To be a bit miffed with DS's school

(39 Posts)
adriennemole Thu 27-Feb-14 20:40:22

Not sure if I'm over reacting.
DS came out of school clutching an autograph from an author that had visited school today, so far fine but he then announces he needs £6 by tomorrow for the book he chose to buy ( by said author).

A bit confused I went in to speak to his teacher who said that a letter went out quite a while a go and that children could bring money in to buy a book.
I can't remember the letter and we certainly didn't receive a reminder. His teacher said that if they didn't have money that they could still order a book if they were sure their parents wouldn't mind hmm.

AIBU to be a bit annoyed that my 9 year old was allowed to make this decision and that there was no reminder?
Feel I've been put on a spot a bit, what about parents who wouldn't be able to afford the £6?
Of course this could be a kick up the ass for me to make sure I remember stuff going on at school grin

Amandine29 Thu 27-Feb-14 20:54:11

Well if he's 9 I think he should be capable of making the decision/knowing what you would want (speaking as a teacher I would assume he had discussed it with you at that age). It's not like he's in reception. Also, some parents are just slack and wouldn't respond to the letter but would be annoyed if their little darling didn't have the chance to buy a book.

But if I'm being honest I think you should be more organised. And I certainly wouldn't expect a reminder from school if you've already had a letter!

SuburbanRhonda Thu 27-Feb-14 20:59:26

Agree, amandine, this is the kind of thing that happens when you don't go through your child's book bag!

The school staff are way too busy to send out a follow-up reminder for this kind of thing, not to mention the waste of resources involved in doing so.

adriennemole Thu 27-Feb-14 21:01:04

I see what you 're saying about knowing what I would want and for most 9 year olds probably true but not for my DS he's quite impulsive and was probably carried away by the excitement of it all, know him well enough to know he wouldn't be thinking of what I would want!
We hadn't discussed it as DS hadn't mentioned it beforehand.
Point taken on being more organised though.

OpalQuartz Thu 27-Feb-14 21:02:57

Do you not want your son to have the book?

CoffeeTea103 Thu 27-Feb-14 21:02:59

They've sent you a letter, no need to remind you again.

adriennemole Thu 27-Feb-14 21:03:12

Also should add that school always send out parent mail reminders so it's obviously made us all a bit lazy grin

adriennemole Thu 27-Feb-14 21:04:28

Yes he does want the book and is paying with it with his own money. Thanks for the replies just wanted to check.

OpalQuartz Thu 27-Feb-14 21:05:57

Maybe he told the school he was going to pay for it with his own money then and that's why they let him have it?

JohnFarleysRuskin Thu 27-Feb-14 21:06:38

The authors visit- the kids beg to buy the book- they bring it home- it's not v good- everyone miserable.

JuanPotatoTwo Thu 27-Feb-14 21:06:51

Apt username in this instance smile

JohnFarleysRuskin Thu 27-Feb-14 21:07:08

(Except the author) ;)

adriennemole Thu 27-Feb-14 21:09:49

Yes, meet the author day, lovely idea but pretty sure book will be lost down the side of DS bed in a couple of days.

Amandine29 Thu 27-Feb-14 21:15:24

I do get what you're saying but if you know your son is a bit more immature than others his age you need to take steps to help him with that. Like checking his book bag grin

adriennemole Thu 27-Feb-14 21:16:46

Found the parent mail from just before they broke up for Christmas! I didn't stand a chance grin

adriennemole Thu 27-Feb-14 21:20:24

Amandine 29- yes, book bag check, PE bag check, lunch check, homework books check, got your coat/jumper etc check. Think I should have learnt by now!

RustyBear Thu 27-Feb-14 21:22:02

This is why schools can't win! If they give short notice, parents complain, if they give a lot of notice, parents forget and complain anyway! And if they do both, parents complain that they are being 'bombarded' with junk mail! (We have had all three complaints from the same parent in our school office.)

adriennemole Thu 27-Feb-14 21:26:15

Rustbear- oh dear, that's a bit crap. I'm not a usually a complainer and certainly haven't complained about this ( just muttered under my breath a bit) grin

starfishmummy Thu 27-Feb-14 21:29:52

Before xmas? Then they should have sent a reminder!

Jinglebells99 Thu 27-Feb-14 21:29:58

Who's the author? A couple of years ago, an author visited my dd's school and there was a frenzy to buy the books, but the author was self published and the books were rubbish. I didn't buy.

adriennemole Thu 27-Feb-14 21:33:39

Jingebells- that the best part, I haven't a clue as could read the autograph and DS couldn't remember either!! The parent mail just said visiting author so I'm guessing he's not well known.

adriennemole Thu 27-Feb-14 21:36:59

Sorry, should say couldn't read the autograph.

Jinglebells99 Thu 27-Feb-14 21:43:10

Hmmm, I would definitely find out who it was before parting with any money. The author who visited my dd's school had written books about a gang of grannies. Can't remember the name of author or books but they were cheaply published and badly written.

Viviennemary Thu 27-Feb-14 21:43:11

I'd be furious. Letters home dropped in a puddle squashed at bottom of bag or disappeared into thin air. I don't think the school was wise making a nine year old commit to buying a book. They could have taken orders from children interested and then no money no book. That would have been common sense.

RustyBear Thu 27-Feb-14 21:43:57

To be fair, most of our parents are lovely - but there is always the occasional exception!

Nocomet Thu 27-Feb-14 21:44:19

I wouldn't have been happy £6 is a fair sum of money and DD2 was a horror for leaving letters in her draw.

JohnFarleysRuskin Thu 27-Feb-14 21:45:56

Exactly jingle bells!

charmschool Thu 27-Feb-14 21:46:52

It gets worse as they get older - when they don't give you letters about school trips, music exams... best to get into the habit now of making sure your son gives you all the info - regard this incident as the kick-start to a more communicative future.

adriennemole Thu 27-Feb-14 21:53:32

Charmschool- I also have a DD at secondary and as well as receiving parent mail from her school she is also completely the opposite to DS. No way would she let me forget! Will investigate more about the author tomorrow I think.

venturabay Thu 27-Feb-14 22:21:12

It sounds an absolute con. Just say no.

missingmumxox Thu 27-Feb-14 22:27:03

Yet another reason I love my boys school, they had a visiting author in year 3 she is a published author and has several children books published, all the Children got given a book free the same one but both sets of twins 1 got a different book and they where all signed with the child's name and a little message, I have no idea who paid but I got the impression it was the author who supplied them by the thank you from the school, it was a clever idea as the books where good and I have actually brought some of the other titles for friends children.

mymiraclebubba Thu 27-Feb-14 22:37:25

adriennemole chalk it up to experience! i have taken to making notes of importnant info in a notebook in my handbag, my diary, the calendar on my phone, the family calendar in the kitchen and the to do list on the fridge cos i have no hope otherwise! however, i don't think yabu to have expected a more recent reminder - even if it was just on a newsletter from school saying 'don't forget X is coming into school on Thursday and any child wanting a book will need to bring pennies in'

Yanbu op. I'm a head of English and I had a row with a publisher over this. She was cross we hadn't made enough sales at an author visit and wanted to offer ious. I refused as I felt it was unfair to parents. I love books and think author visits are great, but this kind of sales technique is outrageous.

wonderingteacher Thu 27-Feb-14 22:52:12

Op I'm with you - most children I know would say 'mum will let me' if their friends are getting one regardless of whether their parents can afford it etc.

wonderingteacher Thu 27-Feb-14 22:52:30

Op I'm with you - most children I know would say 'mum will let me' if their friends are getting one regardless of whether their parents can afford it etc.

adriennemole Thu 27-Feb-14 23:00:54

Wonderingteacher- YES that would be my DS! I think the maturity levels of 9yr olds vary quite a lot and I don't think I would trust DS to have taken that amount of money to school even if I had remembered but I would have no problem with DD doing so at that age.

Maybe a reminder is needed when it comes to children taking money in or an ordering system as mentioned below.

It all sounds a bit dodgy to me.

Scholes34 Thu 27-Feb-14 23:22:51

It's only £6 but it's the principle of the matter.

Great way for the author to drum up sales, though. If the school takes a cut, no wonder they were happy for DS to take one on tick?

Mmmbacon Fri 28-Feb-14 00:16:01

Does your school have text a parent, all schools in this area have it, nearly all contact is via text, pt meetings, half days, non school uniform days, even reminders re mid term dates, brilliant service, much more efficient than post sent on the bottom of book bag, dd school texts to leave you know of your child didn't make out to school aswell so no chance of bunking off,

OpalQuartz Fri 28-Feb-14 07:42:37

£6 is steep for a paperback

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