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To not buy my son toy guns

(45 Posts)
Goldchilled7up Tue 17-Dec-13 22:11:47

As a threat after school if my 4 year old DS has had a good day, we sometimes go to a local pound shop and let him pick any toy. That's the good thing about this age a £1 toy does the trick wink

I've noticed that the store keeps having more and more toy guns. DS is fascinated by them and has been wanting me to buy him one, specially today as he could see that other children were buying them. I told him that guns are bad and hurt people, and that although those are only toys, that it's not good to pretend to do something that can seriously hurt people. I believe he understood because he stopped asking and picked another toy.

I'm I being unreasonable? Will this just increase his curiosity?

Euphemia Tue 17-Dec-13 22:14:42

He'll make guns out of Lego or whatever anyway.

But in your shoes I wouldn't buy him one!

SPsWantsCliffInHerStocking Tue 17-Dec-13 22:15:57

He will play guns anyway. Its up to you though.

Guns don't hurt people, the people that use them do.

"Guns don't kill people, rappers do, calling the police"

grin

Backtobedlam Tue 17-Dec-13 22:17:28

It's your choice as a parent what toys you buy so YANBU, but I think if he's interested in guns he'll find a way. I've seen DS and his friends use Lego, sticks, foam swords and even a piece of toast as guns!

mousmous Tue 17-Dec-13 22:17:30

yanbu
I don't buy them either.
but am a bit torn as building catapults and slingshots outside is great fun...

Annunziata Tue 17-Dec-13 22:20:21

Anything can be a weapon, and anything can be dangerous, will you not let him play cars?

ShylaMcClaus Tue 17-Dec-13 22:22:20

But a lightsaber with FX. Preferably more than one.

We have one lightsaber and one Harry Potter wand. Duelling against wizards is dull. They always win.

Annunziata,

Cars weren't designed with the intent of being a weapon to kill, guns were.

I'm with you OP. no guns for my Ds.

Mim78 Tue 17-Dec-13 22:24:13

Up to you entirely. My dm did buy my dd some toy guns for her cowgirl outfit and I didn't really mind. But I do see the logic of the no guns argument.

FortyDoorsToNowhere Tue 17-Dec-13 22:24:26

Ds has nurf guns, I line empty cans for him to shoot the darts and reset them up.

Yanbu you are his mum and you decide what toys are sutiable

saintmerryweather Tue 17-Dec-13 22:26:01

letting a kid play with a toy isnt going to turn.them into.a gun toting maniac

what if he picks up a stick to use as a gun? or uses his fingers to shape one?

SatinSandals Tue 17-Dec-13 22:26:45

I never bought any that looked like real guns, but they make them as people say using Lego, sticks etc.

MyMILisfromHELL Tue 17-Dec-13 22:27:02

I played with toy guns & guess what? I'm not a mass murderer, I've never shot or killed anyone. <pew pew>

trixymalixy Tue 17-Dec-13 22:30:11

My SIL did the same as you. My nephew just made guns out of anything he could find. Lego, sticks, you name it.

trixymalixy Tue 17-Dec-13 22:31:07

In fact I even remember him biting his toast in the shape of a gun!

DramaAlpaca Tue 17-Dec-13 22:32:22

I had no problem with my DSs having toy guns. As others have said they will make them out of Lego, sticks, cardboard tubes - anything they can get their hands on anyway. The only rule we had in our house was no pointing them at people's faces. All three boys have grown into gentle young men who wouldn't hurt a fly, so I don't think playing with guns did them any harm and they certainly had a lot of fun with them.

I do, however, totally respect your viewpoint if you don't want to allow your child to play with toy guns. You're the parent, so it's your choice.

justtoomessy Tue 17-Dec-13 22:32:29

I have the rule that if it looks like a real gun you can't have it but you can make a toy gun etc. Does that make sense?!?

Explained to DS 4 that the reason he is not allowed a bought toy gun is that he may come across a real gun but think its a toy one and hurt someone.

MegBusset Tue 17-Dec-13 22:32:57

I won't buy my DSes toy guns either, it makes me uncomfortable even though I know rationally it's not a huge deal. They occasionally get one free e.g. with a magazine and I let them play with it for a while before it gets 'lost' wink So I think YANBU.

They did go through a phase of building Lego guns, making stick guns etc but I had a rule that they were only allowed to 'shoot' imaginary baddies, not other people. They're now 4 and 6 and seem less bothered about shooting/guns in general.

CheerfulYank Tue 17-Dec-13 22:35:18

"As a threat" I snorted water out my nose for some reason. grin

It's a tough one. I didn't let DS have any at first and now he has every kind under the sun. It was just a never ending battle that seemed to have no point as he made everything into a gun anyway.

However, we are American and guns are part of life in our (rural, hunting) area. Which is hard sometimes.

Goldchilled7up Tue 17-Dec-13 22:36:27

Thank you for all your replies. It's good to know that I'm not being unreasonable here, but I understand the perspective that playing with guns won't be harmful long term, I played with them too. But for me it just feels wrong buying it for him, and I think that it's a matter of principle.

This might be hypocrite but I don't mind swords, nowadays people don't go out and kill others with swords, but they do with guns.

notapizzaeater Tue 17-Dec-13 22:36:51

I really disagreed with guns, and didn't buy them for my ds but he made them out of anything. He (logically) wanted to know why he could have a water pistol but not a gun.

I eventually gave in when he was 10 as all his friends had them.... Tbh I should have done it sooner as he's more obsessed with them now than any of his friends.

drbonnieblossman Tue 17-Dec-13 22:39:26

if you don't think it's the right thing to do for your ds, stick to your guns.

fwiw, I see no harm in playing with guns and as far as I know there's no correlation between gun crime and playing with you guns as a child. A child's imagination means they will just make one out of something else.

Goldchilled7up Tue 17-Dec-13 22:40:56

Cheerfulyank grin ups I'm on my phone, I didn't notice my spelling until your post smile

SatinSandals Tue 17-Dec-13 22:42:20

I stuck with water pistols, space guns, pop guns etc.

squoosh Tue 17-Dec-13 22:42:45

To be honest I don't really understand the issue some parents have with toy guns. As others have said kids will fashion guns out of anything they come across, it in no way means they grow up to be gun toting loons.

Guns were part and parcel of life for centuries and children playing make believe with make believe weapons is as old as time.

Cat98 Tue 17-Dec-13 22:45:29

I don't buy guns for ds and as a result at friends houses what do you think the first thing he makes a beeline for is?
His friends who were allowed them can take or leave them.
Therefore I probably made the wrong call there, but still wouldn't buy one.

ShylaMcClaus Tue 17-Dec-13 22:46:22

grin at "as a threat"

I might use the same threat of going to Poundland for teenage DD's Christmas presents unless she clears her room out.

SatinSandals Tue 17-Dec-13 22:47:36

Much better not to make it an issue and the phase quickly passes.

Goldchilled7up Tue 17-Dec-13 22:50:39

Shylamclaus gringringringrin

DoctorTwoTurtleDoves Tue 17-Dec-13 22:50:52

SPs, how lovely to find a fellow fan of the GLC. You're a woman of poor taste.

When the boy was about 21/2 he started playing with imaginary guns of his own accord. Eventually we bought him one. He's now 21 and never killed anybody. Yet.

ImagineJL Tue 17-Dec-13 22:52:03

YANBU. I hate guns, and wouldn't have dreamt of buying DS1 a gun at age 4. However, ultimately you can't fight testosterone and you will have to give in eventually. I held out till age 7.

MrsWilliamBodie Tue 17-Dec-13 22:52:31

I did this with my eldest DS. He would just make guns out of his other toys. He is in the army now.

Alibabaandthe40nappies Tue 17-Dec-13 22:52:35

My two year old makes what he calls a 'bammer' with his forefinger and runs around shouting 'Bam! Bam!'

We have no toy guns here, but they build them out of everything and even just their hands suffice if nothing else is available.

Heartbrokenmum73 Tue 17-Dec-13 22:56:23

Guns, I'm quite 'meh' about.

What I don't like (and they're predominantly in places like 99p Shop and Poundland) are those sets you can get for boys that have hunting knives in them. The ones with the serrated edge.

Who the fuck gives their children those?

'Off you go into the garden, dear. Yes, that's it! Just like Rambo did! Ooooh, clever boy pretending to skin a cat!'

DeWe Tue 17-Dec-13 22:58:38

(Toy) Guns are better than swords in the hands of a 4yo.

A gun is fired from a distance whereas even the most accurate 4yo will not be able to avoid contact when sword fighting.

I make my 6yo do the safety (NSPs?) checks on his nerf gun when he picks it up. grin

DramaAlpaca Tue 17-Dec-13 23:01:46

DeWe I agree - there were far more injuries in our house from toy swords than from toy guns.

Heartbrokenmum73 Tue 17-Dec-13 23:04:07

Aaaargh, Nerf guns. DS1 nagged for one for years and years awhile so I got him a target set in the Argos sale last year for his birthday.

It came with eleventy million foam bullets. Could he find one of the fucking bullets three pissing minutes later? Where do they go?

Then the gun disappeared too!

Now, he wants another one.

No.

lifelorn Tue 17-Dec-13 23:05:42

I too banned guns - he made them out of cardboard or rolled newspaper or the favourite stickle brix! When he was ten he saved up all his holiday money to buy a toy rifle and then moved onto video games that involved War in the title, He is now a captain in the army (yes I did cry hidden tears at Sandhurst). We can only attempt to influence but have to accept their life choices,

MrsHeisenberg Tue 17-Dec-13 23:06:20

As a mother of three sons ( and one daughter ) I'd say that it doesn't really matter if you buy him a toy gun or not. He'll fashion a gun out of a twig or anything. Boys are like that. (And little girls who get brainwashed by their older brothers...my two year old daughter said: I've got arms. I'm an arms dealer.)

Preciousbane Tue 17-Dec-13 23:08:13

SP from Bristol Zoo to B&Q. The best line.

I loved a toy gun I had as a child and have managed to not kill anyone yet.

thebody Tue 17-Dec-13 23:10:45

Ffs guns are exactly the same as swords unless you see swords as slightly more mumsnet middle class. Like cricket compared to footi. grin

My lads made guns out of Lego. They also had guns to play with.

They are fine and nice, gentle and caring of their sisters.

SPsWantsCliffInHerStocking Tue 17-Dec-13 23:11:09

Doctor and Precious I'm glad someone noticed. grin

NaturalBaby Tue 17-Dec-13 23:11:39

DH doesn't like toy guns and doesn't want to get any of our boys any guns.
Ds1 got given a nerf gun for his 5th birthday. Now I feel the urge to buy one for my other dc's to defend themselves.

LilyTheSavage Tue 17-Dec-13 23:20:29

As other posters have said, they'll make guns out of anything; lego, stickles, sticks.... My sons all used to play with toy guns and as my dh is in the army I couldn't really say that it's wrong to have guns. However, we did drum it into them that you don't point guns at people, and only shoot things you're going to eat or vermin.
It worked for us.

monicalewinski Tue 17-Dec-13 23:29:03

Guns are fine in our house - just no pointing them in people's faces, and I've always jumped on any ott language 'I'm going to shoot your face off/kill you' etc.

I've always had the opinion that if you ban something it becomes more attractive - try and take the seductive mystery away and it's not as exciting.

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