aibu to think postman should not be changing tyres/ talking at length with people on his rounds?

(691 Posts)
Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 12:49:20

Waiting for an important letter which is dependent on what time I receive it today. So go for a stroll to see if postie is in area. There is he is in the next street changing some girl's tyre for her-I know this is not his car and ours is his last street. He then proceeds to chat to this girl for about 10 minutes, then another woman for about 5 minutes.

I am peed off about this. AIBU?

HesterShaw Thu 28-Nov-13 12:50:27


Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 12:50:34

Btw, I'm not making out he is a serial chatter up of women; could have just as easily been a bloke he was talking to.

rumpledtitskin Thu 28-Nov-13 12:51:19

Yes, yabu

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 12:52:06

Why am I being unreasonable? Didn't realise it was his job to change people's tyres for them.

5Foot5 Thu 28-Nov-13 12:52:43

He sounds like a lovely postie. Don't be so impatient.

CoffeeTea103 Thu 28-Nov-13 12:53:34

It's not his job but he is wants to help people so I don't think there is anything wrong with that.

judgejudithjudy Thu 28-Nov-13 12:53:52

omg what a lovely postie :-) yabvu & entitled.

community spirit! our work postman is fab, he lives near me so often brings my parcels into work for me. He talks and has a chat, his round is all rural, houses are far apart and farms etc.

You postman is Pat Clifton. Do I win a prize?

MissMilbanke Thu 28-Nov-13 12:55:00


I like people like that. That take a bit a time and help others out.

Did you ask for your post then or wait and watch this all going on for 15 minutes hmm

whatsthatcomingoverthehill Thu 28-Nov-13 12:55:20

YABU because the mail is not guaranteed for a certain time. So long as you do get your post at some point what he does on his round is none of your business. If it was so critical to receive by a certain time then you should have got a courier.

Sirzy Thu 28-Nov-13 12:55:30

How nice of him not to just walk past and leave someone struggling to change a tyre.

LoopyLobster Thu 28-Nov-13 12:55:49

bah, humbug

lagoonhaze Thu 28-Nov-13 12:55:53

Its called community spirit. Take it out of a community and you leave sour entitled people.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 12:56:36

Sorry don't know what you mean by entitled? Entitled to what exactly- to receive mail from a man who is being paid specifically to deliver it? I mean how would you feel if your baby is being delivered and the midwife goes out and pulls a few pints in a pub as the local barmaid is ill?

Sorry, do not agree that I am being entitled here at all.

ihatethecold Thu 28-Nov-13 12:56:55

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

custardo Thu 28-Nov-13 12:57:11

I would be more than pleased to have a great postie like that, in fact I would be ringing up the PO and telling them what a wonderful helpful brilliant specimen of a human being he is.

without people like him, what an awful world this would be

well done that postie

I think you are being a misery

Daiso Thu 28-Nov-13 12:57:24

Hmmm. I can see why you are bugged as if I was waiting for important post then I too, would be chomping at the bit to receive it. BUT if it was you who needed your tyre changing or something similar, then surely you would be grateful of the help if postie offered it?
Sounds like a lovely chap who enjoys his job and sees it as a way of being involved in the community.
Did you get your post?

Nannyme1 Thu 28-Nov-13 12:57:36

If I was your postie your mail would be getting lost.
You sound a treat!

Faverolles Thu 28-Nov-13 12:58:13

Our lovely postman from a few years ago was sacked because he took too long to do his rounds (even though he wasn't paid more for taking longer).
He used to take shopping and prescriptions (collected in his own free time) to elderly, isolated people on his round.
He would stay and chat to some who otherwise wouldn't speak to another person all day.
They still sacked him sad

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 12:58:47

No I asked him for the post. But he couldn't/wouldn't give it to me as he was changing the tyre. I don't want to report him for this but, really, his JOB is to deliver post not change tyres.

judgejudithjudy Thu 28-Nov-13 12:58:51

oh yes op, thats the same rofl! lets hope you never needyour tyre changed as only a tyre fitter will do! pathetic.

moldingsunbeams Thu 28-Nov-13 12:58:51

yabu, its called community, she might have had somewhere she needed to go and could not do it and he offered to help her. We do not know the circumstances why she needed help. I wish more people were community focused.

If post was booked in time slots so you knew he should be with you between 10 and 11 am say then fair enough but it does not work like that. Our postman comes at 7am some days ad 3pm the next, its annoying sometimes but one of those things.

LittleMissGerardPoppyButler Thu 28-Nov-13 12:59:06

Maybe he has to wait for the helicopter to deliver your special delivery wink though something is bound to go wrong, but it will turn out well in the end, and he will deliver it just in time.

judgejudithjudy Thu 28-Nov-13 12:59:53

faver - thats so sad :'(

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 13:00:38

Once his round is over, he can change as many tyres as he likes.

you're going to have to wait a little longer op, he's got to find a lost toy first

whatsthatcomingoverthehill Thu 28-Nov-13 13:01:41


Everyone: "Yes"

OP: "No I'm not, you're all wrong"

Why did you post OP?

DIYapprentice Thu 28-Nov-13 13:02:00

His job is to deliver the post, yes, but not by a particular time of day. You get it when you get it, on his rounds. As long as its delivered by the end of his shift, then that is all you're entitled to quite frankly.

YABU. I think I've only ever posted that twice before.
You are lucky to get your post before lunchtime. Ours arrives between 3 and 4 in the afternoon.
Get off your high horse.

Do you know for certain that he has your very important letter?

rumpledtitskin Thu 28-Nov-13 13:04:08

I don't understand this.

I thought your question was aibu?

We've all said you are.

That should be it!

Why ask if you won't listen?

500internalerror Thu 28-Nov-13 13:04:45

So do you get your post at exactly the same time every day? I don't. I wouldn't even know when it's due. It depends on how much he's got, how many need to be signed for. And, yes, how friendly and helpful he is en route .

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 13:04:46

How can I know until he's actually been Binkyridesagain? Perhaps he has to go and change somebody's lightbulb first.

TimeAndRubberBulletsInSpace Thu 28-Nov-13 13:04:51

I'm surprised he had time to do that. Timings for rounds are very tight and they face disciplinary action if they are late back and these times don't take into account busy post times or when they have leaflets to deliver and so will have to visit every house on the round. My FIL left Royal Mail this year due to the awful way they treat their staff.

rumpledtitskin Thu 28-Nov-13 13:05:15

Oh and nice, threatening to report him..

HellonHeels Thu 28-Nov-13 13:05:22

You sound like a bit of a grump, OP

Why are you bothering to ask if YABU if you aren't willing to accept that you might BU?


Beeyump Thu 28-Nov-13 13:06:52

Imagine if the people of Greendale had your attitude, op. sad There wouldn't be a show

rumpledtitskin Thu 28-Nov-13 13:07:33

Maybe the lesson is not to rely on the postman for time critical letters of high importance.

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 13:07:36

I'm sorry but while I accept that you're (so far at least) all saying iabu, I bet if you were in my position you wouldn't be quite so accepting of his ways.

So if you don't know that your very important letter is in his postie bag and you don't know if it WILL be delivered to day why are you getting so worked up?

DoJo Thu 28-Nov-13 13:08:23

OK, either this is a Postman Pat reference, in which case I am surprised anyone ever gets their post at all in your area, or you should have ensured that your letter was sent by one of the time sensitive services.

whatsthatcomingoverthehill Thu 28-Nov-13 13:08:31

That may all be true TimeAndRubberBulletsInSpace but it's nothing to do with the OP. Her (or rather whoever is sending her the letter) contract is with Royal Mail and they don't do timed deliveries unless you pay for it.

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 13:09:10

rumpledtitskin. You're right there; he might have to rescue a lamb from a field or something. Sure as heck can't rely on him to do the job for which he is paid.

favour- that's sounds like the postman at work. people in this village and outskirts can be very isolated, some of the people he takes the time to chat to, wont speak to anyone else all week.

our post at home never arrives before 1pm but as im at work I'm not too worried.

HesterShaw Thu 28-Nov-13 13:09:41


Yes, Pat would say "piss off Mrs Goggins, not now - I've gor to ge the OP's very important letter to her."

WaitMonkey Thu 28-Nov-13 13:09:55

grin at the op's name.

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 13:10:58

HesterShaw, lol it's a coincidence!

Preciousbane Thu 28-Nov-13 13:12:08

How can you get your knickers in a twist over a letter arriving about twenty minutes later because someone is doing a good deed.

YABU people like that postie are what is good about humanity

There are specific services for items that need to be received by a certain time. If the person sending you the letter didn't want to pay for Special Delivery, before 1pm then as long as your post arrives before midnight they have done what they are paid to do. End of story.

If you want to know exactly when all your mail will arrive either insist everyone who posts you anything uses Special Delivery and stump the charges yourself - or invest in a flight of post owls - but even those don't always deliver at the same time.

BetsyBoop Thu 28-Nov-13 13:14:20

If the letter was soooo important it needed to be delivered by a certain time then the sender should have used the Special Delivery Guaranteed by 9am/1pm option.

If they didn't then yes YABU to expect your post to be delivered by a certain time.

Hadn't you better get in position at the letter box?

You have to be standing there arms folded, cats bum mouth, tapping your foot for when he arrives. Have you got a fag you hold and suck on forcibly when he appears, it will finish the look nicely.

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 13:14:38

The thing is I've got a week off and I really need that letter to arrive before a certain time. If he is not here before then, then my plans will have to change tomorrow.

Is it really too much to ask that somebody does their job first and then does good deeds in his own time? Seems so.

HesterShaw Thu 28-Nov-13 13:15:15

Yeah, lol.

BetsyBoop Thu 28-Nov-13 13:15:30

x=post CoolaSchmoola , great minds grin

kali110 Thu 28-Nov-13 13:15:44

Even if i was waiting for something important would i begrudge him helping others out?no i wouldn't!lets hope you never need some to help you.
How mean.
Plus he is still doing the job he is paid to do.

Beeyump Thu 28-Nov-13 13:16:06

What the heck is this letter?? Does it contain a golden ticket?

whatsthatcomingoverthehill Thu 28-Nov-13 13:17:24

No, OP. If I was in your shoes I would recognise that I can't expect the post for a particular time. I certainly wouldn't go wandering around the streets haranguing the poor guy. I absolutely would not threaten to dob him in to his company.

I think YABVVU to rely on snail mail for anything which is time critical to within a couple of hours. It isn't what the service is designed to provide.

5Foot5 Thu 28-Nov-13 13:18:09

Waiting for an important letter which is dependent on what time I receive it today.

Trying to understand this sentence - do you mean the letter is important because some other course of action you intend to take or some decision you have to make will be dependent on what time you receive it?

If it is that important then surely you should have arranged to have it delivered by some other means that guaranteed a delivery time.

Possibly your postie doesn't actually have the letter at all and as far as he is concerned his round is already finished.

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 13:18:40

Is this mumsnet or the Postman Pat fanclub I see before me?

FraidyCat Thu 28-Nov-13 13:18:40

Apparently the postal service is not what it used to be. I've heard that in "ye olden days" one could post a letter at noon in the home counties, addressed to someone in London, telling them where in central London you intended to meet them at 7pm, and they would get it in time to act on it.

(I'm guessing "ye olden days" was before the telephone made that level of service obsolete.)

Willowbear Thu 28-Nov-13 13:19:07


What a lovely helpful man.

Your post is not guaranteed to arrive at a specific time. If you have a very important letter then have it sent special delivery.

I'm impressed that you can still get letters delivered, I thought posties just delivered junk mail.

Abra1d Thu 28-Nov-13 13:21:00

He sounds lovely. I wish more were like him. I hope he gets lots of large Christmas boxes.

fluffiphlox Thu 28-Nov-13 13:22:11

Leave him alone! He sounds like just the sort of chap the community needs.

onlysettleforbutterflies Thu 28-Nov-13 13:22:49

YABU - I hope you never need to ask a passing person for help and they refuse. Community spirit is incredibly important, well done to the postie, hopefully the girl he helped will contact his boss to commend him. Where I live there is no specific time the post is delivered, it gets there when it gets there.

TurnOffTheTv Thu 28-Nov-13 13:22:49

I can't believe you would actually report him for helping someone out, what a horrid thing to do! Just because you have your knickers in a twist you could affect a whole family and their income, how utterly nasty. You should have arranged to get it guaranteed delivery if it was that important to you.

SwishAndFlick Thu 28-Nov-13 13:24:07

YABU if it was so important you could have paid for special delivery or whatever the service is called so that you get your mail before 10 am.
If its normal post then as long as he delivers it before his shift ends he is doing his job.

Lilymaid Thu 28-Nov-13 13:24:10

Our postie stops for a cup of tea and chat with one of our neighbours every day, leaving his bike and the post unattended.
I haven't complained but it is a little annoying when I'm about to go out and my post is still in his bag parked opposite.

FuckingFuck Thu 28-Nov-13 13:26:23

Faverolles that is terrible, poor postie.

OP YABU, if your letter was as important as you say you'd have had it sent by courier. The postman sounds really helpful and lovely, but he could easily have been held up for any reason on his round so you were never guaranteed to have the letter today.

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 13:27:35

F* me he's arrived...

thebody Thu 28-Nov-13 13:27:57

as a former district nurse I can assure you that a good postman can save lives by looking out for elderly/vulnerable people.

perhaps you need to get out into the real world and see what's really important in life. which isn't your letter!

ghostonthecanvas Thu 28-Nov-13 13:28:18

Beeyump grin

He sounds a very kind man. The importance of posties in the community should never be underestimated.
I grew up in an isolated community and the postie made a huge difference to peoples lives. I went to school on the postbus and 30+ years later still enjoy reminiscing about all the kindnesses of our postie.
I would hope that these days some of that continues.

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 13:28:54

Oh you wonderful wonderful postman you have delivered the letter, let me kiss you all over. I luv you 4 eva.

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 13:29:14

grin Time to go...

Morgause Thu 28-Nov-13 13:29:23

He sounds lovely, I hope you don't try to get him the sack just before Christmas.

Beeyump Thu 28-Nov-13 13:30:11

Is he wearing shorts? I love it when postmen wear shorts, it's so sweet.

Daiso Thu 28-Nov-13 13:30:40

YABU not to tell us what was in this special letter wink

Preciousbane Thu 28-Nov-13 13:32:43

I love it when postman wear shorts because I think their uniforms are sexy blush anyone else or am I alone in my weirdness?

I thought this was going to be a jokey thread about postman pat and his dereliction of duty. Sadly, it seems to be someone complaining about their actual postman helping someone out. The bastard!!

Beeyump Thu 28-Nov-13 13:33:09

Yes Daiso, I am all agog!

Chivetalking Thu 28-Nov-13 13:39:52

So the Very Important Letter has arrived within the timescale you needed it?

No need for the histrionics then really, was there?

hiddenhome Thu 28-Nov-13 13:40:40

I sincerely hope that the OP doesn't report him hmm He sounds like a very nice fellow and people like this are few and far between these days.

ghostonthecanvas Thu 28-Nov-13 13:45:38

I am wondering if ops next post will be about the local taxi driver [bright yellow - always toot tooting] who is never available because he is also always busy in the community, with an unhealthy interest in her neighbour Tess.

nauticant Thu 28-Nov-13 13:49:53

You should buy a single Royal Mail share, going to the annual general meeting, and ask the board to sack him.

nauticant Thu 28-Nov-13 13:50:29
StrattersCat Thu 28-Nov-13 13:52:17

Blimey, our postman at our old house used to call in for hot chocolate when it was really cold. Started off as part of the 'dogs, he really isn't going to kill/burgle/maim everyone' lesson. That was a total failure, but he enjoyed his hot chocolate, I enjoyed the chat, and I always got my post delivered.

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 13:54:47

No I am not going to report him. But I did tell him that I didn't realise it was part of his job to change tyres.

But the vaguely sanctimonious posts here about 'what is really important, not your letter' do get on my wick.

Firstly, because royal mail is NOT a free service. They don't deliver mail out of the goodness of their hearts.

Secondly, because letters (communication in general) are what makes the world go around. OK, letters ARE old hat, but, to put it in modern context, how'd you like it if your internet provider cut off your e-mails because they had to go and deliver a calf or something?

People are right to say that these days you can't expect mail at a certain time, I agree. But that's no excuse to veer off doing other things other than your job, is it?

BenNJerry Thu 28-Nov-13 13:56:25

YABU!! If the letter is that important it should be sent via Special Delivery which will get it there by a specific time.

I had a lady come into my work who was elderly and started to feel a bit faint. I went and got her a chair and a glass of water. That wasn't part of my job, I'm not paid to do it. I thought I was being kind. Should I have ignored her just to make sure I didn't piss off everyone else?

LifeofPo Thu 28-Nov-13 13:58:16

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

StrattersCat Thu 28-Nov-13 13:58:50

Your postman is a human though, not a robot.

Beeyump Thu 28-Nov-13 13:59:32

'But I did tell him that I didn't realise it was part of his job to change tyres.'


judgejudithjudy Thu 28-Nov-13 14:01:38

just give up op is a first class postman stalking twat O:-)

StrattersCat Thu 28-Nov-13 14:02:38

I don't have the physical strength to Po, I have tried on numerous occasions, as it would be far quicker and I know how to. I simply cannot get the nuts undone, and I'm quite strong.

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 14:04:02

Yeah well, judgejudithjudy, see how you feel when you're waiting for something YOU regard as being important and the person can't be arsed to deliver whatever that thing might be because he's doing something else.

Would you complain if the supermarket cashier got up up help someone who'd collapsed? Would you come on here to say that the cashier service is part of the price of stuff in the supermarket and s/he shouldn't be off doing stuff that isn't beeping your shopping through?

Because, honestly, you aren't coming across as a very nice person.

Who goes out wandering the streets to check up on their postie?

He did deliver it, just not when YOU decided it should be delivered by. He has filled the requirements of his job and helped someone along the way.

But the postman doesn't fit the 'can't be arsed to do his job' description at all because he did deliver your letter. He just helped someone else out too.

I couldn't change my car tyre. I don't have the physical strength and I would just do myself damage. I would be very grateful to someone who stopped to help me.

TheVermiciousKnid Thu 28-Nov-13 14:08:16

But did he ring twice? They never do, you know.

StrattersCat Thu 28-Nov-13 14:08:54

Do you mean to sound such an arse?

<PA headtilt>

ChippingInLovesAutumn Thu 28-Nov-13 14:13:44

What a weird thread. It must be one of those stupid ones that are about a TV program - so Postman Pat I assume - how is Jess?

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 14:14:56

If someone had collapsed it would be different but changing a tyre's hardly in the same league, is it? Nor is chatting to somebody for about 15 minutes.

If he'd been ringing an ambulance because somebody was in a car crash of course I wouldn't have moaned at all.

Squidwardtenticles Thu 28-Nov-13 14:15:04

It has absolutely nothing to do with you what the postman does. My local postman is exactly the same as this and it's brilliant.

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 14:17:00

Why exactly isn't it anything to do with me? Does the public not pay his wages by paying for stamps? It's everything to do with me what he does- last time I checked, Royal Mail wasn't a free service.

Heartbrokenmum73 Thu 28-Nov-13 14:17:17

Is this a 'hilarious' take on Postman Pat? Complete with 'comedy' NN?

OP - must try harder, because you're actually coming across as serious, you numpty.

StrattersCat Thu 28-Nov-13 14:18:45

Hah! Missed the NN, it has to be a Postman Pat pisstake.

Doesn't it? confused

JustMe65 Thu 28-Nov-13 14:18:54

He sounds lovely ,, a real community spirited Postie.

I've just had some mail delivered, postie didn't even alert me to his presence. Bastard!

StrattersCat Thu 28-Nov-13 14:20:31

Our postie was here at 7.30am with parcels. <smug>

Heartbrokenmum73 Thu 28-Nov-13 14:20:50


I hope so, but it isn't humorous if it is!

I'm not sure the it would be OK if someone had died stance makes you sound any nicer, actually.

In buying a stamp you don't get to decide how the postie organises his round. Do you want to decide if his haircut is suitable for gracing your front path too? He delivered your letter on the day he was supposed to and that was royal mail's obligation to whoever paid for the stamp on the letter addressed to you.

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 14:24:35

No it's not a pisstake; I am genuinely peed off with him changing tyres, chatting incessantly to people on the street and generally metaphorically saying a big 'f* you, you don't matter" to those who pay his wages i.e. those sending and waiting for mail.

If this is an attempt at humour, I fear the OP was off the day they handed out the senses of humour.

qazxc Thu 28-Nov-13 14:26:04

I agree you do pay for a service from Royal Mail, but the service does not include you getting your post by X time.
You did get your post, so really you got the service that you paid for, regardless on your postman changing a tyre or talking to someone.

ZombieMonkeyButler Thu 28-Nov-13 14:26:26

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

That isn't saying a big fuck you to anyone. That's called being a decent human being who understands how to interact with the public. It is a good thing for everyone (including Royal Mail) if their employees are seen as good, helpful, kind, approachable citizens who get the mail delivered.

It's not like he dumped your mail in a bush and went to the pub, is it?

Heartbrokenmum73 Thu 28-Nov-13 14:26:53

You saw him change one tire, it's not a regular occurrence. And you wouldn't have given a shiny shit but for the letter you were waiting on.

So yeah, you're being selfish and quite nasty with it.

(Still think it's a windup though - 'early in the morning, just as day is dawning, he goes round changing tires on his van...)

ShatnersBassoon Thu 28-Nov-13 14:26:56

This is obviously a cage rattler. Nobody would go looking for the postie because they were waiting for a letter. They'd just assume there was no post for them or that the post was late (perfectly normal, everyday occurrence).

Beeyump Thu 28-Nov-13 14:27:05

Mmm, a tyre changing postman in shorts saying a metaphorical 'f* you' (fi? fo?) - I love this guy!

The OP didn't pay for the service, whoever paid for the postage did and they got the service they paid for.

HarryTheHungryHippo Thu 28-Nov-13 14:28:19

Oh fgs op you don't singlehandedly pay his wages, I think you'll find we all do too and since none of us give a stuff that your having a tantrum and we all like the fact he's a decent human being that argument is invalid.
Seriously get a grip, you got your letter and the world didn't end. Your just making yourself look silly now

GhostsInSnow Thu 28-Nov-13 14:29:22

Is OP Hyacinth Bucket?

Maybe it's a really crappy reverse AIBU and the OP is the postie who has been berated by a weird postman stalker. Although presumably the OP would still be delivering letters.

You might get more sympathy for an AIBU for being pissed off with my postie for being on MN complaining about stuff instead of delivering letters thread. Would also have been funnier.

Squidwardtenticles Thu 28-Nov-13 14:34:12

I hope your letter has been lost in the post grin

Heartbrokenmum73 Thu 28-Nov-13 14:34:40

OP, we all pay his wages, and everyone but you is happy with this situation, so why don't you just stop using Royal Mail, deliver all your mail in person and collect from other people and we'll continue to pay for this lovely man.

HesterShaw Thu 28-Nov-13 14:36:02

Ok OP, you need to be nicer.


DeWe Thu 28-Nov-13 14:36:56

Our postman is like that and he's fantastic. He removed a large spider for me once! He also has waited because he knows I do the school run, come back to me when he saw me coming in because he had a parcel for me, staked up our tree when the stake had come off... all without being asked to.

If you can't change a tyre easily then calling someone out may be easily a couple of hours and where she has to get to may be as important or more important as your letter. I asked some workmen to change our flat on the motorway on the way to a funeral. I'm very glad they didn't say "oh it's not our job" because we would have missed it by the time rescue had got to us.

I think you need to watch the milkman ad.

Now we don't have so many milkmen the postman has to help!

I think he sounds lovely.

Oh and YABU

sparkle101 Thu 28-Nov-13 14:43:50

Why why why why why why why why why why why x 1million come on aibu if you're not willing to accept that everyone has said you are being aibu? Why not just go on chat and show the facts as a thread instead of asking for opinion which is what aibu is after all?

Ilovefluffysheep Thu 28-Nov-13 14:45:22

If you need it by a specific time, cough up and pay for special delivery. Otherwise YABU.

Gileswithachainsaw Thu 28-Nov-13 14:45:26

Yanbu. How dare he be helpful and kind. He must be a grumpy old dick who has time for nothing and no one and eagerly shoves your post through the door at 5am on the dot without eating weeing drinking or anything else that may take away the valuable posting time.

ProfPlumSpeaking Thu 28-Nov-13 14:46:36

I imagine the postie's job is to post all the letters on his round rather than in a particular time frame so he IS doing his job.

When I was waiting for an important letter last year (not time critical, just really important news) I told my postie - he is lovely like yours - and he specially looked up my post first for days as otherwise we too were last on the round. Try making friends with your postie; he sounds just the kind of nice guy that would be willing to go to a little effort in checking out your post from his pile on one occasion when you need it, and in return you can be kind and friendly to him on his round. Everyone will be happy smile.

Hopasholic Thu 28-Nov-13 14:47:32

Well you may have had your post delivered today OP but if I was your postie, it'd be accidentally going astray from now on.

I can't stand it when people trot out the 'I pay your wages' line makes me simmer with rage!

reelingintheyears Thu 28-Nov-13 14:48:40

Miserable sod.

Clumsyoaf Thu 28-Nov-13 14:48:49

Really???? Yabu ... You sound like a lovely person - not ��

kali110 Thu 28-Nov-13 14:50:17

Here, have my first grip.

I wouldn't be able to change a flat tyre either. Lets hope if you are ever stranded anywhere noone helps you as its not part of their job.
What a horrible miserable person.

reelingintheyears Thu 28-Nov-13 14:50:44

Oh, fuck me backwards!

You pay his wages. grin

flipchart Thu 28-Nov-13 14:53:42

Thought you were in a rush! Have you opened your letter or are you still whinging!

moldingsunbeams Thu 28-Nov-13 14:54:27

This is like the water shooter thread all over again.

AIBU - Yes
OP No I am not!
Everyone else - yes yabu
OP no I am not

ZombieMonkeyButler Thu 28-Nov-13 14:54:30

Actually, I've changed my mind, you are completely in the right and definitely have an excellent basis for complaint.

You really must go straight down to the PO Depot/Sorting Office and demand to speak to his Manager. Don't forget to put your issues across in full, not forgetting to mention the desperately urgent time sensitive letter that was sent via normal post and the fact that you pay the wages of everyone in the building (with your 60p stamp).

Go on, please grin.

Contact the newpapers, they could photograph you with a sad face holding the letter and pictures of you pointing at the tyre.

Beeyump Thu 28-Nov-13 14:57:22

metaphorical cake and brew for the good hearted postie - just in the hope of holding him up a bit more...

moldingsunbeams Thu 28-Nov-13 14:59:18

grin zombie

Heartbrokenmum73 Thu 28-Nov-13 15:00:19

Contact the newpapers, they could photograph you with a sad face holding the letter and pictures of you pointing at the tyre.

Love this grin

MelanieRavenswood Thu 28-Nov-13 15:03:28

This is a bit weird. It's nice that the postman is so helpful and all, but if someone posted on here that they were waiting at a PO counter, and the person serving popped out to change someone's tyre - or went over to a customer's house for a hot chocolate - and she was cross at being kept waiting ... there would definitely be a large chorus of YANBU then. I think the two situations are comparable in the OP's mind.

Am not convinced OP is in the right but i do think some of the messages calling her selfish etc are a bit unnecessary.

Lovecat Thu 28-Nov-13 15:04:27

Well, if it's not a postman pat-related joke, I refer you OP to your own posts on the 'how much for your little girl?' thread - you can't possibly report this man without being a mahoosive hypocrite!

After all...

If you report him, they will sack him!

He may have a young family to support!

He didn't really mean it!

Without actually having been there, I determine by my MN psychic powers that he must have been re-enacting a scene from a famous film (Il Postino?) so he meant no harm and you are over-reacting hysterically!

What he wasn't doing was making sexist and belittling remarks to a lone woman with a child. But apparently that's ok while at work...? hmm

knowledgeispowerr Thu 28-Nov-13 15:05:50

I haven't read the thread just wanted to say YANBU and 'entitled' raises eyebrows of course he sounds lovely but he's being paid to do a job and your mail was urgent.

moldingsunbeams Thu 28-Nov-13 15:11:39

But knowledge he did not know her post was urgent did he.
It was not sent special delivery before 9 or before 1 so if his shift is between 9 and 3 and all his post gets delivered between 9 and 3 has he really done anything wrong?

Lets not forget he is probably entitled to a break as well during that time.
Our post comes anytime between 7am and 3/4pm depending on whether someone is ill and been asked to do an extra round.

knowledgeispowerr Thu 28-Nov-13 15:17:08

If he was on a break of course no one has the right to complain but if you're on the job you're supposed to be working, as other pp have compared it with different scenarios its the same thing

moldingsunbeams Thu 28-Nov-13 15:17:38

I have had a look and a FT postman can work 40 hours a week, therefore he is entitled to a break and a lunch break and can change as many tires as he wants.

Beeyump Thu 28-Nov-13 15:19:35

Like the not at all crazy example of the midwife leaving off delivering a baby 'to pull a few pints as the local barmaid'? Yes, I too thought that was absolutely the same thing.

moldingsunbeams Thu 28-Nov-13 15:21:22

How would OP know he is or is not on a break though, our postman walks miles, its unlikely he would walk all the way back to the office for his lunch or his break?

Gileswithachainsaw Thu 28-Nov-13 15:22:49

Geez, just imagine how you would all feel if everyone who could help you just walked by and said "not my job"

One day op that could be you. Stuck in a cold car unable to go anywhere hoping that the aa turn up whilst people just walk on by.

You sound like one of the customers I've had to serve sodding wanting serving whilst we wait for an ambulance to turn up for another customer. Stepping over them on the way to the counter.

He is being paid to deliver letters on a round, he will have all the mail for that area to deliver within a certain amount of time, he is not being paid to deliver the letters at a certain time. If he manages this to do his job and a little extra within his shift brilliant, if his takes longer then its for his boss to deal with.

Its not for the OP or anyone else to dictate what time their mail should be on their doorstep for.

She didn't know if the letter was in his mail bag so she might not have received it today anyway and the postie had no idea that any of the mail in his bag was for her or if it was urgent.

He did his job.

takeitonthegin Thu 28-Nov-13 15:27:08

I bet he takes his pesky cat, Jess, with him on his rounds!!!

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 15:42:38

MelanieRavenswood That is it exactly. To my mind there is no difference between what the postman did and a PO counter assistant nipping out to change a tyre while people are in the queue.

Would those calling me unreasonable be quite so understanding in this situation, I wonder? Doubt it.

Or they're strapped for time in a shop and the assistant nips out to change a tyre.

Think the lone-female-tyre situation has biased some. Like I said, ours was his last street; why not change the damned tyre after his round. Fair enough that would be in his own time.

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 15:45:41

Gileswithachainsaw. Doubt that somebody collapsing is the same as a change of tyre, is it? Hardly comparable. And I'll say this: if I was in your queue in this situation, I would be prepared to wait.

This was broad daylight by the way on a residential street. This girl was not stranded in middle of nowhere.

Mckayz Thu 28-Nov-13 15:45:55

Lovecat I thought exactly the same as you. I doubt it's in a security guards job description to piss off people walking past. But according to Nomorepat that's fine.

You wasn't waiting in a queue. You was waiting at home for something that didn't have to be delivered by a certain time. If you hadn't gone out looking for him you would have been none the wiser and would have just accepted the letter would arrive when ever.

The PO counter example is completely different. The person serving at the counter would have to leave the shop to change a tyre. The postie was walking past.

It's more akin to the person at the counter helping someone whose toddler had just tipped the contents of their bag all over the floor, or someone whose shopping bag has burst in the shop. I'd be quite happy for shop staff to actually help the customer out because you never know when it might be you needing the help.

I'd still think you're a total misery is it was a burly bloke whose tyre he was helping to change. It would still be helping another human out and A Good Thing.

Gileswithachainsaw Thu 28-Nov-13 15:50:18

Well they are legally entitled to a break. Maybe he took it or does he need to ask first if changing a tyre is an acceptable way of spending it.

ShatnersBassoon Thu 28-Nov-13 15:50:50

Stop bloody moaning! You got your letter, and the postman did someone a lovely favour. Everyone's a winner!

I really don't know what this thread is all about, but I'm so glad I don't see the bad in everything. It must be exhausting to be so grumpy.

Gileswithachainsaw Thu 28-Nov-13 15:51:51

Hardly comparable?

Yet you compared a postie to a midwife. My comparison was no worse!!

Also, it's not a fucking queue where people are waiting to be served. You were waiting at home for your post to be delivered. No promises beyond 'today' had been given.

Not the same thing at all.

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 15:52:12

Maybe I'm just old-fashioned in that I think when people are paid to do a job they do that job as their primary duty and everything else-bar genuine emergencies -can wait. Obviously I am.

Didn't realise that the consensus was that Postman could treat his job as a social run. hmm

Gileswithachainsaw Thu 28-Nov-13 15:53:09

And so glad you would have been prepared to wait in my queue. You wouldn't have had a choice though!!

In fact, had promises of today even been given?

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 15:54:47

It's a valid comparison, the PO counter assistant has to leave the shop and the Postman's 'shop' if you like is walking and delivering letters and not being sidetracked by anything else than emergencies.

ShatnersBassoon Thu 28-Nov-13 15:54:51

Ha! You're over-egging the pudding now op. This made absolutely no difference to your day, yet you're still moaning about what the postman did for someone you've never met in the next street.

Perish the thought that this had happened on a day when you weren't home and you never got to find out about it. Who would have made the bloke feel bad for being normal then?

Yes, OP, you are the only person who thinks the world is a better place is people don't do each other favours and show kindness. HTH.

It is not a valid comparison. The only way in which the two are similar is that they involve post.

What do you class as a genuine emergency? How do you know that the person who he was helping didn't have a genuine emergency? you have no idea of the circumstances prior to you seeing the tyre change, so have no idea what the owner of said tyre was going through or why they needed their car.

You got pissed off because something wasn't happening when you wanted it to so have gone out hunting for something to vent your anger at.

I almost wish the OP has the kind of dodgy postie who steals your amazon packages or opens cards to check for cash, not the kind who helps people out and is friendly. Then she might have something to complain about.

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 15:59:25

Binkyridesagain, so what about the FIFTEEN minutes he spent chatting then? He's an arse and he is ALWAYS doing this sort of thing? I would not report him, but by goodness, when he's not around, the mail gets delivered a lot more quickly.

His job is to deliver mail. Not chat to people in the street.

pianodoodle Thu 28-Nov-13 15:59:29

Our post comes pretty late on in the day so I wouldn't want to rely on it arriving at a specific time.

I don't go out hunting down the postman though grin

Beeyump Thu 28-Nov-13 16:01:02

He's not an arse, he's a lovely postman! angry

Gileswithachainsaw Thu 28-Nov-13 16:01:08

He also spent 6minutes stroking the cat at number 37 grin

ghostonthecanvas Thu 28-Nov-13 16:01:52

He is an arse? You know him then?

ShatnersBassoon Thu 28-Nov-13 16:02:45

What difference did it make to you that your post came a bit later than you expected? Serious question.

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 16:03:14

Gileswithachainsaw, wouldn't surprise me. Perhaps he wormed it an' all and delivered its kittens whilst mopping Splodgekins (cat) sweaty brow*

*or cat equivalent.

motherinferior Thu 28-Nov-13 16:03:47

I still remember the absolutely lovely postie who brought heavy stuff in for me when I was hugely pregnant. He came in to see DD2 after I'd had her and told DP how happy he was for us.

This is possibly irrelevant but it gives me a Warm Glow, so I reckon YABU.

He does deliver the mail. It gets there when it is supposed to (I.e on the day he is issued with it).

Most people aren't sitting next to their letter boxes waiting to pounce, or stalking the streets monitoring their postman. Both those things are odd.

I'm pretty certain that Royal Mail would see an employee who helps people out and is friendly while wearing their uniform (and delivering his mail) as a very good thing. That's the best kind of advertising they can get.

Misery guts jobs worth types don't do anyone any favours.

sparkle101 Thu 28-Nov-13 16:07:14

He gets his job done in the time allotted to him. It is none of your business how he does that. He doesn't stand there when you're getting ready to out casting aspersions on how long it takes you to do stuff and what you should not do.

Calling him an arse? Aren't you just a treat?

Gileswithachainsaw Thu 28-Nov-13 16:07:15

Why don't you write to the bbc and see if you can co host "postie watch" with bill oddie

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 16:08:18

Really, ArbitaryUsername, never waited for exam results or job application results or a cheque or anything else important in the mail, then?

To have not done so is odd IMO.

What is more, once he's been around and he's not got your mail that day, you can get on with other things. He shouldn't be making people wait when his job is to deliver mail. He can be helpful and play Mother Theresa in his own time.

jammiedonut Thu 28-Nov-13 16:09:02

Yabu simply because he wasn't late delivering your post, it just got to you later than you wanted it to! You'd have hated my ex, he used to do half his round, pop round for brekkie (1hourish) then carry on. He also used to leave half the post in his boot if he couldn't be bothered and just do it the next day. He was a rubbish postman, and boyfriend come to think of it!

My Postie has a natter to me, breaks his day up, talking to people as he goes along, I haven't invited him in for a brew yet but he does like having a peep in my garden.
I've also scooped a postie up from the pavement when he went arse over tit on some ice, maybe I should have left him, wouldn't have wanted to interfere with his round wink

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 16:10:34

I'm pretty sure Royal Mail would not view it as a very good thing at all. None of my business what other mn-ers do for a living, but I'll say this: if you were going 'off piste' in your jobs to carry out arbitary acts of kindness (not talking about genuine emergencies here) for others instead of doing your jobs, would your employer be pleased? I think not.

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

Beeyump Thu 28-Nov-13 16:11:55

nomorepat the world you live in sounds like a cold, grey sort of place. That is all.

erm yes my DHs employers were very happy when he changed the tyre on a couples car, they saw it as a very good advertisement for their company.

Beeyump Thu 28-Nov-13 16:12:56

<applauds Laurie>

Gileswithachainsaw Thu 28-Nov-13 16:13:46

You can't have that much to do if there's time for documenting chat times and stalking postmen

I've waited for stuff in the mail, but I'm pragmatic enough not to be sitting by the letter box or stalking my postman.

Last time I was 'waiting' for post it arrived a few days later than I'd expected. Nothing to do with my postman, the sender just took longer to process stuff than I'd've liked. Still, I didn't complain or grumble to anyone.

If you wanted it by a certain time, you need to pay for special delivery. If you're not going to do that, then stop imaging that your 60p stamp made you your postie's line manager.

I'm willing to put money on you being the sort of person that treats your waiter like s/he's not really a person. Do you click your fingers to get their attention and such like?

thebody Thu 28-Nov-13 16:14:48

you sound like a peach op.

Heartbrokenmum73 Thu 28-Nov-13 16:15:23

Gosh, OP, you're just lovely, aren't you?

And having read your comments on the thread about the little girl, who on earth are you to complain about anyone?

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 16:16:22

LaurieFairyCake, as you think it is OK to call people cunts, I think you have no imagination.
What if somebody was waiting for a cheque that HAD to be paid in before a certain time of day else their car tax (or something else) would be late meaning they wouldn't be able to get to work without breaking the law or similar? (random example)

Mail IS important and it beggars belief that people could think the Postie's good deeds and socialising comes before it. hmm It really does.

The world would be chaotic if everybody behaved like him.

I vote we all go round the OP's house with mince pies and carolling. With buckets of empathy and niceness.

We could strap her to a chair and show her 'a Christmas Carol' grin

No one deserves to be this unhappy or lack so much humanity as the OP

Acts of kindness as well as his job, not instead of.

You don't seem to be able to get your head around the quite simple concept that he still did his job.

Heartbrokenmum73 Thu 28-Nov-13 16:17:40

What if somebody was waiting for a cheque that HAD to be paid in before a certain time of day else their car tax (or something else) would be late meaning they wouldn't be able to get to work without breaking the law or similar? (random example)

well, then they should pay for special delivery - which is what you should done, you cheap arse.

DoubleLifeIsALifeOfSorts Thu 28-Nov-13 16:17:52

He sounds lovely smile

reelingintheyears Thu 28-Nov-13 16:18:26

May I ask why you posted in AIBU when you clearly don't think you are?

You could have posted in legal matters and found out how to sue/sack the idle bastard.

sparkle101 Thu 28-Nov-13 16:18:30

I'm sorry everyone.


the world does not and never will revolve around you.

I didn't say post wasn't important, but unless you pay for it to be delivered at a certain time you get it when you get it.

Post is scheduled to arrive between 7am and 6pm.

Feel free to complain if it arrives after that.

Until then shut the fuck up.

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 16:18:52

No he did not do his job at all, ArbitaryUsername, his job is to get the mail delivered as soon as he reasonably can. He failed.

And no fyi I do not snap my fingers at waiters. I am polite.

Gileswithachainsaw Thu 28-Nov-13 16:19:23

Don't cheques take five days to clear? Why would u send it the day before it was needed confused

reelingintheyears Thu 28-Nov-13 16:19:27

What with you being his employer an' all. wink

The world is chaotic.

I suggest you look up chaos theory grin

Heartbrokenmum73 Thu 28-Nov-13 16:19:37

Hope OP never needs help from anyone when out and about in case it impinges on someone's job.

flipchart Thu 28-Nov-13 16:19:50

You are also boring!
Change your tune!

No, that is not in the job description of a postie.

There is nothing in there about doing your round as quickly as possible.

You are completely wrong and know nothing about postie employment contracts.

The person waiting for the here would already know that they were cutting it fine and would probably be expecting it not to arrive before that deadline. You They should be annoyed at yourself themselves for being so badly organised not the bloody postman. Or SORN and get public transport to the meeting, then sort out the tax once the cheque has cleared. You do realise they don't clear immediately. It's not a good idea to rely on cheques in the mail for time sensitive stuff.

Everyone knows that the post could arrive at any time during the day. If they need it before noon, etc, they have to pay for special delivery.

reelingintheyears Thu 28-Nov-13 16:21:19

I'd leave Chaos out of this, her theories are quite bonkers. grin

sparkle101 Thu 28-Nov-13 16:21:40

Dear mumsnet,

Please can we have a topic entitled "I am not being unreasonable, I am correct all the time no matter what anyone says" or IANBUIACATTNMW for short. So people who clearly don't think they're wrong can go and whinge.

Isthatwhatdemonsdo Thu 28-Nov-13 16:21:45

FFS OP. Stop clutching your pearls and lighten up. Your a right misery.

reelingintheyears Thu 28-Nov-13 16:23:19

<<wonders what to do for tea>>

His job is to deliver the mail during his shift. He did it. He fulfilled the requirements of his contract.

LucySnoweShouldRelax Thu 28-Nov-13 16:23:48

I work in a pub. I often give people change, offer directions, lend neighbouring pubs co2 or whatever, even if there are others at the bar. Hasn't gotten me fired yet.

For the numpty millionth time, you are not entitled to post at an exact time. You got your post, thus he did his job.

(I am biased, 1. people I like thoughtful people and 2. some of my favourite customers are posties. They wear shorts, and they work hard. Boo you.)

reelingintheyears Thu 28-Nov-13 16:24:02

I fancy minted lamb chops.

What shall I do with them, new pots?

I find it hard to believe that you are polite to waiters. You weren't polite to your postie today.

And you seem to think that you get to redefine his job role to suit you. His job is not to do it as quickly as possible, in an it's a knockout style event, but to deliver it all to the right addresses before his shift finishes. He achieved that.

reelingintheyears Thu 28-Nov-13 16:25:27

NINE pages because the postman helped someone out and someone else got all cross and red faced.


Sirzy Thu 28-Nov-13 16:26:05

The world would be chaotic if everybody behaved like him.

The world would be a much nicer place if people behaved like him. Nice to see people being selfless, unlike you OP who is very much demonstrating the selfish approach to life.

Reeling: I suspect this particular OP will be irate about you using this thread for anything other than telling her that she's totally right in everything discussing the topic at hand. Deviation for the task set will not be tolerated. grin

reelingintheyears Thu 28-Nov-13 16:26:17

Ooops, ten pages. grin

fluffiphlox Thu 28-Nov-13 16:26:41

Oh OP, I'm generally a grumpy, self-righteous git but even I think he was doing a good deed. Get over yourself and your 'important letter'.

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 16:27:02

ArbitraryUsername that's because every waiter I've met has politely asked me what I'd like to order and not nipped out to change a random stranger's tyre halfway through the order. So, yeah, I am polite to waiters or anybody who's doing the job for which they are being paid for that matter.

reelingintheyears Thu 28-Nov-13 16:27:14

So, minted lamb chops, new pots and what else?

Sautéed Jess cat?

Sirzy Thu 28-Nov-13 16:28:01

Can you imagine the OPs uproar if the waiter stopped to help an eldery lady to her chair, or helped a chocking infant meaning she had to wait longer for her food!

Heartbrokenmum73 Thu 28-Nov-13 16:28:42

It would be interesting to see what Royal Mail think of this thread.

As the vast majority agree that the postie did a wonderful thing (and is, in general, a wonderful person), while a tiny minority are miserable bastards and would happily see the bloke hung, drawn and quartered.

I think what he did is excellent PR for them.

Not good PR for The Grinch OP though.

mateysmum Thu 28-Nov-13 16:29:22

My postie is lovely, walked past him today when he was chatting to a neighbour and we all had a chat whilst he stroked my dog (who regards him as a pal). We are in a rural area, Martin has been doing this round for years and he is part of the village community - posties are not automatons, they provide a real service. YABU.

When my late mum was living on her own and not in good health, her postie Carlton kept an eye on her and when I told him she'd died, he had tears in his eyes. Bless.

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 16:29:33

No uproar at all, Sirzy as that would be an emergency.

reelingintheyears Thu 28-Nov-13 16:31:11

Having thought this thread through properly I have decided I agree with the OP.

Who did he think he was, a bloody boy scout doing his goo deed for the day?

Orf with his head.

Sirzy Thu 28-Nov-13 16:31:11

And for the person needing a tyre changed it may have been an emergency.

RaRa1988 Thu 28-Nov-13 16:31:13

Good lord OP, did you just call yourself 'polite' on the other page? And this one in fact? Hahahahahaahahaha grin. You sound like one of the rudest people I've ever met. Your postman, on the other hand, sounds lovely and a credit to Royal Mail.

Just out of interest...

If you GP pauses during your consultation to ask how your day has been, do you get annoyed because that's got nothing to do with prescribing your meds? Do you get upset waiting longer for a dentist because he pauses to give a little girl a sticker? Would you get pissed off getting stuck in a queue of traffic because someone had stopped their car to help a broken-down motorist/fallen old lady? Would it upset you if the lady at your local corner shop asked you to wait a minute while she picked up the shopping a disabled person had dropped? You sound really charming. God help everyone who comes into contact with you!

Gileswithachainsaw Thu 28-Nov-13 16:31:36

How kind of you pat so glad you approve of medical energencies . Can I go to the bathroom now?? hmm

LittlePudding1 Thu 28-Nov-13 16:31:43

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

reelingintheyears Thu 28-Nov-13 16:31:56

*Goo deed, he was helping a baby.

judgejudithjudy Thu 28-Nov-13 16:31:56

does the postie not know how important op is? after all she pays his wage with her 60p stamp rofl.

ormirian Thu 28-Nov-13 16:32:11

Ha ha ha ha! ROFL etc <wipes away tears of mirth>.....

...err.. it WAS a joke wasn't it?

Gwan.....surely it was?

TimeAndRubberBulletsInSpace Thu 28-Nov-13 16:32:49

OP as you are paying Royal Mail's wage bill, how about suggesting to the sorting office that your house becomes its own round with one dedicated postie and therefore you are the only person that will be delivered to.

sparkle101 Thu 28-Nov-13 16:33:03

May I suggest the only way out of this catch 22 we find ourselves in is if the op gets up nice and early and goes and delivers the post with the arse postman, she can then tell him ways to streamline his route, things to avoid, important houses to cross off the list, do not have any breaks, any fun, any communication, and most importantly do not help anyone.

Oh and get him to post at yours first because after all you are more important than.... Well everything.

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 16:33:29

'Excellent PR' . Lol. Just wait until you're waiting for something and the Postie's chatting away for 10 minutes down the road. Won't be quite so forgiving of him then, I bet. Nor will anyone here.

Or if post is a bit too old hat for some, substitute any situation for which somebody is being paid to do you a service but can't be asked because they're doing something else.

reelingintheyears Thu 28-Nov-13 16:34:28

My Postman, my own personal one that is, is still wearing shorts.


<<wipes brow>>

ormirian Thu 28-Nov-13 16:34:36

I get paid for my job. But sometimes, when I am feeling very irresponsible, I post on MN and talk to people before I finish all my work shock Should I shop myself?

Gileswithachainsaw Thu 28-Nov-13 16:35:03

I've waited for important things before. I've also seen our postie sit down and take a break.

The world didn't stop turning and no one died.

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 16:35:19

Go on, just imagine how you'd really feel and be honest instead of towing the party line about good deeds and all that stuff.

ghostonthecanvas Thu 28-Nov-13 16:35:34

Am I the only person thats wondering how op got to where she needed to go after the letter arrived. <<pissed everyone ignored my noddy reference upthread>> I have been worrying that Thomas is helping with an emergency on the line and that Bertie is similarly engaged. Noddy, well he visting Tess so no taxis. Course op could drive. Hopefully she wouldn't get a flat tyre. Or walk. Can't think of a kids reference for that. Distracted by lamb chops.

NoComet Thu 28-Nov-13 16:35:44

It isn't the man in Sainsbury's job to wait by my car and warn me I'd got a flat tyre, but I'm massively Glad he did.

Being able to pump it up at their garage and meant DD2 wasn't standing on the doorstep wondering where I was.

ShatnersBassoon Thu 28-Nov-13 16:35:57

OP, I'll ask again. What difference did it make to you, having to wait longer than expected for your post today?

reelingintheyears Thu 28-Nov-13 16:36:00

Report him Giles, sitting down on the job will NOT be tolerated.

Sirzy Thu 28-Nov-13 16:36:30

I really couldn't care if I had to wait longer while the post man helped someone, or had a chat with someone who may not see another person all day. The world doesn't revolve around me though but it seems it does you.

Gileswithachainsaw Thu 28-Nov-13 16:38:20

I very nearly did reeling he was having a drink and every thing shock

He should have been delivering till he passed out in the heat god damn it

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 16:38:57

It revolves around me when the postman whose wages I help pay for through ridiculously high stamp prices decides to chat all day and change tyres, yes. Yes, this does revolve around me. As it revolves around every other customer of Royal Mail, too.

All this revolve around you stuff is nonsense in this situation.

phantomnamechanger Thu 28-Nov-13 16:39:25

come on OP, YABU and we all know it. Your postie sounds lovely, as is ours. sometimes the postie will be the only person a housebound person may see or speak to for days on end. They are often the ones who raise the alarm about folk taken ill, because they notice things and know their patch. It is LOVELY when someone goes out of their way to help change a tyre or something. It has happened to me and I cried like a loon because the guy who helped was so sweet and calm and I was in a total panic. random acts of kindness make the world a better place and just maybe that woman whose tyre he changed will be on here later to say how he made her day, got her to her interview or work on time etc etc.

ormirian Thu 28-Nov-13 16:39:25

Look OP, if it was that vital that you received it before a certain time it should have been sent by a different method, email, or one of those arkane services that require you to fill in forms at POs and stick stuff on your letter, or something. It can be done! The normal standard mail service doesn't have any time-related guarantees as far as I know. It simply promises to take something with the right postage on it from one place to another. They did that. Hurrah!

Retroformica Thu 28-Nov-13 16:39:54

The postmen here are like pillars of the community. They have jump started cars, helped old ladies in need etc. He always manages his round - so what's the problem?

reelingintheyears Thu 28-Nov-13 16:40:21

Anyone see this at the top of the page. ^

Tyre Fitting On The Drive

Tyre fitting at home on your drive or at your workplace car park


Sirzy Thu 28-Nov-13 16:40:27

All day? I thought he chatted for 5 minutes? Quite worrying that you even timed in.

Anyway, surely the person he helped also pays his wages so that argument is sort of nulled anyway not that it was a valid one anyway

sparkle101 Thu 28-Nov-13 16:40:29

Does anyone have a brick wall please? I need to bang my head against it.

Heartbrokenmum73 Thu 28-Nov-13 16:40:50

Just wait until you're waiting for something and the Postie's chatting away for 10 minutes down the road. Won't be quite so forgiving of him then, I bet. Nor will anyone here.

I know how crazy this is going to sound OP, but I have actually experienced waiting for important mail. My old postie (we live elsewhere now) was on my route for 13 years. He was fantastic and knew everyone by name on the street. I loved him. Never, once, did I think he wasn't doing his job properly if the post wasn't there when I wanted it.

And we were last on his route too. My post generally used to arrive during the school run at the end of the day - big fucking deal. If I wanted something urgently, I paid for special delivery. It's not your postman's fault that you are a) tight and b) miserable/rude/Grinchy*

*delete as applicable.

Do you honestly believe you are the only person who's waited on important post?

ShatnersBassoon Thu 28-Nov-13 16:40:51

So really, what difference did it make to you, having to wait longer than expected for your post today?

BenNJerry Thu 28-Nov-13 16:41:07

OP, may I ask, HOW did you know this letter would be arriving today specifically? I work at the PO and first class mail takes 1-3 days, second class 3-5. No mail is GUARANTEED to arrive on a certain day unless you send it Special Delivery or a similar service. What if the letter hadn't been in his mail bag?

Retroformica Thu 28-Nov-13 16:41:53

Hard nosed op. Where is your community spirit? Maybe he was for to take a break anyway?

Heartbrokenmum73 Thu 28-Nov-13 16:42:14

As it revolves around every other customer of Royal Mail, too.

Right, so that's all of us here then - and we don't give a shit and we think your postie is fucking wonderful. So who would Royal Mail prefer to listen to?

HellonHeels Thu 28-Nov-13 16:43:28

Dear god OP are you still arguing?!

The postman is not in dereliction of his duty. You got your post within the time allowed. One of my mates is a postie, you can crack on and get your round finished extra quick and then finish for the day or you can go a bit slower, pause for a tea break (or to change a tyre) and finish your round later. As long as you finish in time, job's a good 'un.

Are you usually this ridiculous?

kali110 Thu 28-Nov-13 16:45:12

Think majority of people on here have had to wait for important post but wouldn't moan at the postman for doing these things.
Still cant believe how unreasonable and rude you are. I have actually been waiting for my mail this week.
I wouldn't go moaning if my nice postie was helping a man or woman change a flat. My god we need nicer people in this world, we definitely have enough nasty ones.

judgejudithjudy Thu 28-Nov-13 16:45:26

op answer the question? if so.important why send normal mail? could of been lost? btw still imagining youstalking the postie lol

RaRa1988 Thu 28-Nov-13 16:47:18

I'm starting to think the OP is a troll... This has gone beyond the realm of the ridiculous.

Mckayz Thu 28-Nov-13 16:47:23

Fucking hate these threads.

OP: no I'm not <throws dummy out of pram>

You got your post. Ergo he did his bloody job!!!

My post comes at different times everyday. Providing it arrived before 4pm then he has done his job.

Heartbrokenmum73 Thu 28-Nov-13 16:47:30

I had a parcel arrive while I was reading this thread earlier! It's a conspiracy, I tell you.

And it was a very important parcel too - without the contents I can't get any further in the first dungeon in Zelda grin.

lollilou Thu 28-Nov-13 16:47:34

The only way the op can salvage this is to tell us what was in the letter! Then we will all realise that a random act of kindness was NOT in any way shape or form as important as her letter. smile

Whenever I have been to the post office they always state that buying a stamp is no guarantee that they will deliver the letter to were its meant to be. So frankly I think the postie in managing to deliver your letter to you has gone over and above what is required.

EauRouge Thu 28-Nov-13 16:49:33

This is hilarious, I'm in stitches at the OP's inability to let this go.

shimmeringinthesun Thu 28-Nov-13 16:50:26

Gosh, this is unbelievable.

Op - if you were so desperate for your post, and as the postie isn't allowed to just hand you your mail in the street, why didn't you offer to change the car wheel, leaving the postie free to go deliver your letter.

That way, you would have done a good deed for the day, and the postie would have done his job to your satisfaction.

I think what he did was brilliant...and the world hasn't even stopped turning!

thebody Thu 28-Nov-13 16:51:11

set your dogs on him op. I don't know what the servants are thinking these days keeping you waiting like this! bloody disgraceful.

Heartbrokenmum73 Thu 28-Nov-13 16:51:32

I wonder if it occurred to the OP to see if she could lend a hand with the tire-changing?

That way, the postie would have been done quicker and it would have been a nice thing to do. Plus, OP wasn't doing anything anyway, other than curtain twitching and getting irate.

Doubt that very much though - suspect the OP is a troll person who walks by anyone needing help.

Heartbrokenmum73 Thu 28-Nov-13 16:52:15

Oooooh, massive cross-post with shimmering - great minds, eh grin

LadyInDisguise Thu 28-Nov-13 16:53:30

Well the customer if Royal Mail isn't you OP. It's the sender if the letter so as such you can not ask for anything specific.

On a customer pov, the letter should be delivered in a day normally if it's first class. There is no time limit to it, just an indication if a day. So the postman still delivered the post as per the agreed service. It would have been different if the post was supposed to arrive before 1.00pm and it had arrived at 1.30. but not if you saw the postman at 10.00am, he delivered the post at 12.00 and hanged a tyre in the mean time
The fact he was having a chat etc has nothing to do with you as recipient ie who the letter is delivered to, or as a customer, when you send the letter. This might be an issue for the company but this is an internal issue that had to be dealt with internally they might well have nothing to say about it if he still does his round within the time frame he was given

Tbh I think you were stressed and pissed off by a tight deadline but have put all your anger onto the wrong person. A bit like killing the messenger.

Gileswithachainsaw Thu 28-Nov-13 16:54:53

Well none of our post matters as much as op's does. We haven't had to wait for drs appointments, test results, cheques, job offers or school admissions allocations have we. Nope not us.

"Just wait until you're waiting for something and the Postie's chatting away for 10 minutes down the road. Won't be quite so forgiving of him then, I bet. Nor will anyone here."

Speak for yourself, nomorepat - and while you are about it, stop implying that people who think what the postman did is OK, are just 'toeing the party line'. You have NO right to imply that they are not being entirely honest.

And to answer your question - no, it wouldn't bother me if my postman was helping someone change a tyre, or having a chat. I think the world is a better place for having someone like him in it.

NOTHING dreadful happened because your mail was delayed by 20 minutes. Get over yourself.

Heartbrokenmum73 Thu 28-Nov-13 16:57:11

Giles shock

Did you not read my post about waiting for my game guide to arrive? That was massively more important than a poxy cheque/hospital appointment/school admission letter.

Get some perspective grin

Gileswithachainsaw Thu 28-Nov-13 16:58:06

grin wink

JustRestingMyEyes Thu 28-Nov-13 16:58:37


JustRestingMyEyes Thu 28-Nov-13 16:59:58

That jammy dodger is for the OP obv.
Having been a postie her attitude sucks big cocks.

member Thu 28-Nov-13 17:01:46

Oh dear! I can understand getting worked up about the contents of a letter/ not being able to exert control over the delivery time causing anxiety and over-reaction.

The dogged commitment to curmudgeonliness is shock though.

You got your letter, move on!

shimmeringinthesun Thu 28-Nov-13 17:02:09

Great minds indeed mum73 wink

StrattersCat Thu 28-Nov-13 17:04:58

Is it just me that is secretly wishing a flat tyre upon the OP, and her poor postie goes sailing past her, finger in the air?


Willowbear Thu 28-Nov-13 17:06:42

There is also the idea that the postman was actually using his break time to change the tyre.

He is entitled to take a break from delivering post and can use this to chat/help/fix if he so wishes.

If i was your postman OP i would rearrange my round so your street was the very last one i delivered to.

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 17:08:46

Heartbroken73 if it meant the Postman delivered his rounds earlier to me I would have offered but I do not know how to change a tyre-like most mners in that respect. And you are completely wrong about me not offering assistance to anybody. Completely and utterly wrong.

frogwatcher42 Thu 28-Nov-13 17:09:47

I love our postie. God knows what time he gets home as he has tea and cake at numerous places around here - picks stuff up from my mum and gives it to me (or vice versa depending on what direction he is going), helps out the elderly with all sorts etc etc. If the weather is bad and he can't get up the tracks then he leaves stuff with somebody else who is going that way later or in a tractor etc.

He is very well thought of in these parts and a real treasure. But some days I don't get post till very late. But if that means Elsie up the road has company for half an hour, and Bill gets help with something then so be it!!!!

I think this thread is a wind up. My post is real.

BackforGood Thu 28-Nov-13 17:09:48

What makes you think MNers can't change a tyre ? confused

HesterShaw Thu 28-Nov-13 17:09:50

Perhaps the OP can call the Daily Mail and be in a sad face photo, holding up her late post?

ShatnersBassoon Thu 28-Nov-13 17:09:55

Ooh, you're back op. I'll ask again.

What difference did it make to you, having to wait longer than you anticipated for today's post?

StrattersCat Thu 28-Nov-13 17:10:10

So you have no idea how to change a tyre, yet you begrudge your poor postie helping someone else do something you are incapable of doing?

Jeeeeez. You really are a piece of work.

GhostsInSnow Thu 28-Nov-13 17:10:57

My postie is named Greg. He's very nice, always stops for a chat (mostly about the football). He'll get a bottle of wine at Christmas from me grin

He keeps an eye on the 90 year old lady 2 doors down, if I have a parcel and I'm not in he'll pop it in his car and bring it to me later, often on his way home and on his time. When I had a phone delivered recently and the address was wrong he knew it was for me from the name so brought it straight over.

I think I probably have the best postie ever and I'm bloody grateful for him because over the years he saved me dozens of trips to the PO and several lost items. And yes, he's still wearing shorts hmm

MildDrPepperAddiction Thu 28-Nov-13 17:11:53

He was being a Good Samaritan. Stop being so miserable.

Would you like a lesson? You'll be prepared for next time, you could also learn the art of polite conversation as well, then you could take over when he stops for a natter with someone.

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 17:12:22

He does this all the time, though, on one occasion he was chatting to somebody on the street (it was a saturday so I was at home) and I was waiting for the post. I politely asked him how long he'd be getting to my house; he was there 15 minutes later just chatting. He is an arse who has forgotten what his job is.

Going to let this go now. One more thing, though, don't forget to be all forgiving and sanguine next time you're anxious and impatient and somebody's not delivering a service that you've paid for, will you? wink

My mum's postman will take her parcels to the post office for her, because she lives in a tiny village with a bus service once a week!

Sirzy Thu 28-Nov-13 17:13:03

Why assume that most MN-ers can't change a tyre? I can and I am sure plenty f others on here can.

I would still be greatful if someone stopped to help me though, just like I have stopped and helped others in the past.

FixItUpChappie Thu 28-Nov-13 17:13:26

You sound like a bit of a grump, OP

What an understatement. If I said what I though the OP was acting like my post would get deleted.

My postman stopped to help someone who's car broke down waaaah! Why isn't it all about ME, ME, ME, ME!!! waaaah!


StrattersCat Thu 28-Nov-13 17:13:37

Mine's still in his shorts too and that makes me very happy, he's lovely. If I'm out he calls back on his way to the PO as his route goes past me. He's also quite used to parcels turning up for me with all sorts of odd names.

Best one so far was 'To The Mad Dog Lady'. The house number was one out, but he still knew it was for me. grin

So its not the first time you have been badly let down by him then?

Nope still can't raise any sympathy for you.

ghostonthecanvas Thu 28-Nov-13 17:14:35

If nothing else, it is lovely how many great posties there are out there. This thread has highlighted that.

StrattersCat Thu 28-Nov-13 17:15:14

Look OP, you have a big thread here, and NOBODY ELSE AGREES WITH YOU.

Doesn't that give you a great big fat hint that you really are being quite remarkably unreasonable? Or are you still on your 'world revolves around me' planet?

Beeyump Thu 28-Nov-13 17:16:09

Actually, op, it is you who is an arse. A massive, massive arse.


RabbitFuckerFromAHat Thu 28-Nov-13 17:17:04

YABU, and making yourself sound rather unpleasant, TBH.

StrattersCat Thu 28-Nov-13 17:17:37

I think postmen do a fairly shitty job. They're out there in all sorts of crap weather, fending off dogs, wading through snow and puddles, just to put bits of paper through our letterboxes.

And all that awful walking <shudders>

fluffaduck Thu 28-Nov-13 17:18:16

OP I can just see the thread now, from you if the boot was on the other foot.

"AIBU to be annoyed that my postie refused to help me change my tyre this morning even though he could see I was struggling! Said he was too busy doing the job he's paid to do. What a jobs worth! Where's the community spirit"

I would hate to be a person in need when your about.
Lets hope the next time you are stuck and need help there are nicer people than you about who will take 15 minutes out of their day to help you.

I think your postie is great and if I knew where he was based I would contact the local sorting office and sing his praises.

frogwatcher42 Thu 28-Nov-13 17:18:39

Op - really?? You can't see that YABU???

The post isnt going to arrive at the same time each week or day anyway because it depends on too many other factors. Surely you can wait an hour or so longer for it as it is unpredictable anyway.

If something is that important and has to arrive on a specific day, nobody in their right mind would send it by normal post especially this close to Christmas!!

TimeAndRubberBulletsInSpace Thu 28-Nov-13 17:18:45

Was it a parcel of salt and vinegar for the massive chip you have on your shoulder OP?

StrattersCat Thu 28-Nov-13 17:19:13

You'll be singing a different song if you get a flat, and he sails past you.

I'd flip you the bird if I were him.

Gileswithachainsaw Thu 28-Nov-13 17:19:21

But YOU didn't pay for it. The person sending the letter did.

phantomnamechanger Thu 28-Nov-13 17:20:08

how can you politely ask him how long it will take to get to your house???? I can't see anyway that could come across as polite. Each day will be different, depending on how heavy his bag is and how many other people have/do not have mail that day, how many gates he has to open, dogs he has to dodge or long drives he was to walk down. Oh and how many other rude people stop him to demand exactly what time he will deliver their mail too! Why the heck do you think you are entitled to ask him this? as long as you get your mail eventually, its none of your business!

If your letter was special delivery before 9 and it was 8.58 then yanbu, otherwise yabu selfish and entitled. Postie doesn't get paid by the hour, and so what if he's chatting or helping someone out. You never know, one day you might be in a pickle and he's the one who offers to help. It's called community spirit, and long may it last!

LadyInDisguise Thu 28-Nov-13 17:22:28

OP once again you are not the customer! the person who send the letter is the customer because it's them who laid the stamp!!

FuckingFuck Thu 28-Nov-13 17:22:31

Nothing wrong with being a bit anxious or impatient if the service which was paid for wasn't being delivered. However in this instance the service which was paid for was provided!

Had the postman swung naked from the lampposts he would still have delivered the service as you got your letter.

phantomnamechanger Thu 28-Nov-13 17:23:16

Was it a parcel of salt and vinegar for the massive chip you have on your shoulder OP? arf!!

Gileswithachainsaw Thu 28-Nov-13 17:24:53


If there are posties swinging naked from lamp posts tomorrow im blaming you grin

EauRouge Thu 28-Nov-13 17:25:29

don't forget to be all forgiving and sanguine next time you're anxious and impatient and somebody's not delivering a service that you've paid for, will you?

What, and miss the opportunity for a thread like this? No chance, I'm going to throw my toys out of the pram big time and then insist IANBU even though everyone else disagrees.

BenNJerry Thu 28-Nov-13 17:26:27

So you've harassed him before about the mail OP? He probably delivers your mail last because you're such a douche about it. As would I if I were him.

FuckingFuck Thu 28-Nov-13 17:26:55

Giles stranger things have happened wink

Gileswithachainsaw Thu 28-Nov-13 17:28:32

I'd send a strongly worded letter but it might be late grin

BarfaStewart Thu 28-Nov-13 17:28:42

I love our postman, he chats to everyone, always gets our post delivered before midday and delivers in the most horrendous weather, and still chats cheerfully.


happydutchmummy Thu 28-Nov-13 17:29:35

The last time I had a flat tyre I pulled into tesco car park. The very lovely and helpful security guard offered to help me change it as I am an incompetent fool when it comes to cars. Would you argue that that as he was not in the store searching for shoplifters that he was not doing his job? Because technically I am sure that changing tyres isn't in his job description, and it could be argued that it was a dereliction of his duty to go out and help me. However I was so grateful that I wrote an email to tesco praising him and his helpfulness. I hope his boss is more understanding that you.

What a lovely postman, changing someone's tyre for them. I am sure healso spends time chatting to people, but that's not an issue- there are some lonely people out there and he may be the only bright spark in their day/week.

Bowlersarm Thu 28-Nov-13 17:31:12

Wow op. You just stick to your lonely point of view.. I'm joining the rest of mumsnet.


fluffaduck Thu 28-Nov-13 17:32:35

I think this is the biggest collective of YABU's I have ever seen!
It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside to know that "the world revolves around me OP" is in the minority.
I may flash my postman........................and extra smile tomorrow grin

Twitterqueen Thu 28-Nov-13 17:33:01

OP, I cannot believe you are being such a tight-arse about this.

This postie was doing someone a huge favour. It probably meant he was late coming off his shift, which he wouldn't be paid for.

Surely this is what community-minded society is all about?

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 17:35:49

One more thing, though, I'm not a troll. To be honest, why would I troll mumsnet with a post about an idle postman, doesn't make sense. So, yeah, I accept that the consensus is that IABU, but that doesn't make me a troll.

fluffaduck Thu 28-Nov-13 17:39:13

Ok own up you lot who said the T word???

I don't think even a troll would be as unreasonable as you in this situation OP wink grin

member Thu 28-Nov-13 17:40:40

Do I hear the swinging of stirrups??

thistlelicker Thu 28-Nov-13 17:41:57

I think somebody should tweet this to Royal Mail and see what they say!!!

Maybe won't go large like penis beaker, but after all the shit with Royal Mail in the news it's nice to see some humane actions !

cricketballs Thu 28-Nov-13 17:43:52

Can't believe that the op is still convinced she is right grin

We all love our postie in our village; he chats to the elderly every day, called an ambulance for someone the other week when he looked through the window and saw them collapsed when they weren't there to speak to him. I for one prefer to have my post late if it means my community has someone who keeps a look out for those in need

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 17:45:08

I really wouldn't do that. Yes, I have moaned like crazy over the postman here, perhaps vented too much, but I would not report him for it. Royal Mail might not see it as humane, after all.

StrattersCat Thu 28-Nov-13 17:47:15

I'd pay good money to see my postie swing naked from a lamp post.

Hey, maybe tweeting this IS a good idea grin

StrattersCat Thu 28-Nov-13 17:47:47

I don't think anyone else thinks you're humane either tbh.

Preciousbane Thu 28-Nov-13 17:48:52

Op I really want to know what kind of job you do, a time and motion officer perchance?

member Thu 28-Nov-13 17:49:12

Or just the creak of a saddle

Gileswithachainsaw Thu 28-Nov-13 17:49:24

envy at all these nice looking posties everyone seems to have

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 17:53:50

No tweeting this is not a good idea at all. Really it isn't, yes I've moaned like crazy here and been told IABU and seems that the majority say that I am an old misery guts. Well that's mn and how it operates. Nevertheless, being really serious now, all I've done is moan about him. I would NOT report the postie all the same. Tweeting this may genuinely cause trouble for postmen everywhere and Royal Mail may put out a warning for postmen not to chat etc etc. So, really, it may backfire. So, please, no tweeting.

Chippednailvarnish Thu 28-Nov-13 17:54:14

Is it 'cause he's ginger?

shimmeringinthesun Thu 28-Nov-13 17:54:51

How can you call the postie idle OP, when you yourself are complaining of him going beyond the call of duty for the community?

Mckayz Thu 28-Nov-13 17:54:53

My postman is a grumpy bugger. Looks about 12, but it wouldn't bother me if he stopped to change a tire.

I do wish he'd put trousers on though. His shorts makes me feel cold.

RaRa1988 Thu 28-Nov-13 17:55:20

I said the t-word Fluffaduck. I refuse to believe the OP is serious. If so, how does she function in daily life? Must be really difficult being constantly on another planet to everyone else hmm. And, assuming she works, does she never take a loo break/blow her nose/say hi to anyone/make a coffee on company time??

COCKadoodledooo Thu 28-Nov-13 17:56:04

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 17:12:22

Going to let this go now. One more thing, though, don't forget to be all forgiving and sanguine next time you're anxious and impatient and somebody's not delivering a service that you've paid for, will you? wink

Unless you sent the letter that your life depends on so much to yourself, then you weren't paying for the service, were you?

One of those things. I think your postie is great. And I think maybe it really wasn't worth you getting het up about.

LoveLikeStarlightNeverDies Thu 28-Nov-13 17:56:12

Is anyone familiar with the expression "going postal"?

Although I do think the OP is BU, a little situation with a local postman is really annoying me. He stashes his bike in the bushes near the local uni., then goes into the library to read all the papers! Should I tell the librarian that he is not a (mature) student? Should I tell the post office? I think it is really annoying. he takes up room on the small couches where students are supposed to sit and he really is not doing a good deed or being friendly, like in the OP's case

Heartbrokenmum73 Thu 28-Nov-13 18:01:59

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

cricketballs Thu 28-Nov-13 18:04:22

Or love is he taking his legally entilled break?

Bogeyface Thu 28-Nov-13 18:05:18

I got a full house on "I pay your wages", anyone else?

Heartbrokenmum73 Thu 28-Nov-13 18:05:28

Who are all these bastard postmen who think they're entitled to breaks? Nail 'em up!

LoveLikeStarlightNeverDies Thu 28-Nov-13 18:07:03

No, he is there for three hours in a row. (I have been spending a lot of time in the library researching, but leave at 2:30 to collect DC. He also leaves at 2:30 to collect his DD)

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 18:07:55

To be fair, LoveLikeaStarlightNeverDies, sounds like the guy is on a break to me.

Heartbrokenmum73 Thu 28-Nov-13 18:08:51


Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 18:09:23

Heartbrokenmum73, I dislike it when people drag comments from other threads here, but I guess that is your choice to do so. It's bad taste IMO.

Beeyump Thu 28-Nov-13 18:11:40

I reported suspected troll, mostly because I just didn't want this to be true. Sorry.

Gileswithachainsaw Thu 28-Nov-13 18:11:41

Perhaps he doesn't drive and it's not worth going home only to have to go back out again to pick up his kids?

StrattersCat Thu 28-Nov-13 18:13:54

It's bad form, but rather relevant given your attitude on this thread, compared to the other one.

Heartbrokenmum73 Thu 28-Nov-13 18:15:04

Well, I dislike it when people behave like utter prickwits towards someone who is helping someone else and also when they behave like arseholes towards someone who was asked 'how much for your daughter'.

Personally, I think everything you write is in 'bad taste'.

And I brought up the other thread to further illustrate what a cockwomble you truly are.


StrattersCat Thu 28-Nov-13 18:15:59

I would say that the Library Postman has finished his shift.

They work hard to finish their shifts in time, and there is no way he'd manage a 3 hour break without being noticed. He probably doesn't drive, and it's not worth him going home before picking his daughter up. Or he simply likes going to the library to read the papers, which he's perfectly entitled to do.

StrattersCat Thu 28-Nov-13 18:16:25

<childish snigger at 'cockwomble'>

MommyBird Thu 28-Nov-13 18:17:22

My dh is a postie.

He once waited for ambulance with a drunk woman who had fell and cut her head. He helped an old lady who fell over in the snow, drove her home, put her shopping away and rang her daughter. He has helped an old man carry a TV and set it up for him. oh! and helped a woman looking for her cat. they found him!

That is just off the top of my head.
All whilst he was working, because he is a good egg.

So yes. yabvvvu.

LoveLikeStarlightNeverDies Thu 28-Nov-13 18:17:31

ooops, sorry I should not have asked a question when I have to go so soon (Cubs meeting), but it is more the library use that I think is wrong. There are signs up about how it is only for student use. He takes up lots of space and the students seem to be wary of him, sitting crammed together, a good distance from him. I cannot believe he has a 3 hour break, but it is possible. I am in Ireland, so not Royal Mail. Also, this is petty, but do postmen own their bikes- those High Nelly ones? Because I think some student might help himself to it, the way it is thrown in the bushes...

LadyBeagleEyes Thu 28-Nov-13 18:19:21

Is that you a amillionyears?

BlueSkySunnyDay Thu 28-Nov-13 18:20:26

YAB hideously U - I dont think they are committed to getting the mail to you by a certain time are they?

Our postie pops his head into MIL and puts the post on a chair for her as he knows she is disabled and struggles to get it - I guess it throws his timings off a bit but its community spirit and how the world used to work when it was a nicer place and not run by killjoys with their eyes on the bottom line ££££££s

I guess the kind of people who complain about this sort of thing are the same ones who were always dobbing you in at school...killjoy hall monitors grin

StrattersCat Thu 28-Nov-13 18:23:14


I was thinking more along the lines of the Lowing One.

So it's a student only library? confused

LoveLikeStarlightNeverDies Thu 28-Nov-13 18:23:52

yes, giles and stratters have a good point. I asked one of the technicians in the library about this guy, since her husband is a postman, and she was like "Oh, yes, he has already been kicked out of Easons and Centra for spending hours reading the papers."

foslady Thu 28-Nov-13 18:24:04

Hope you or yours never need a favour OP...........

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 18:24:27

Beeyump Thanks for that. I am not trolling here. I accept that I am in the minority, but my views are genuine and I am not trolling. Do you report everybody who disagrees with you? I've had a lot of abuse here on this thread but never have I retaliated with name-calling etc.

Gileswithachainsaw Thu 28-Nov-13 18:26:12

How can you get chucked out a library for spending too much time reading. confused

LoveLikeStarlightNeverDies Thu 28-Nov-13 18:28:19

Also, yes, a student- only library. They was a problem with secondary school students meeting there and hanging out, so they have signs up and actually used to check student id/ library cards at the door. But |I accept the break is probably legit. Cubs on...

Heartbrokenmum73 Thu 28-Nov-13 18:28:29

No, you just called the postie an arse. The one who isn't actually here to defend himself.

Bet you didn't say that to his face though, did you?

Beeyump Thu 28-Nov-13 18:28:32

Yes, I report everyone who disagrees with me. It's tiring! grin

moogy1a Thu 28-Nov-13 18:31:59

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

Heartbrokenmum73 Thu 28-Nov-13 18:33:27

Moogy hold your breath because....I agree with you!

Bet we both thought that day would never come, eh? grin

StrattersCat Thu 28-Nov-13 18:34:25

It's really up to the librarian then, if she doesn't mind him being there, there's no real problem. If she does, it's down to her to sort. I can't imagine any student being intimidated by a postman, it's not like they hide axes in their sacks.

Ok I've not read all comments on this thread because frankly I can't be arsed but surely the day when we all go to work "just to do the job" will be a very sad one indeed.

So the hospital employee who takes time to sit and talk to a distressed patient or relative, get them a cuppa or a box of tissues, working late at the end of a shift to catch up on time spent "not doing the job they are paid to do" - do they fall into the same category as your postman?

Or the council worker who finds a dead cat at a refuse point, who calls an owner to tell them the sad news? Again, not doing the job that they are "paid" to do. Criminal, eh? Particularly given how much council tax costs hmm

Or the pharmacist who makes sure that an elderly patient who can't get out of the house gets their insulin on time by taking said medication to them in the middle of the day. Should they also be criticised for "not doing the job"?

Or do you think that maybe, just maybe, that by simply being kind, and human, and going the extra mile and using some of your own time to get the job done to make sure that others are OK, might be a worthwhile use of time?

Naive? Perhaps. But I know what type of a world I'd rather live in.

moogy1a Thu 28-Nov-13 18:36:11

law of averages meant it had to happen eventually! grin

Gileswithachainsaw Thu 28-Nov-13 18:36:37

<checks papers for man eating ferel postmen reports>

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 18:36:53

I don't actually mind being called a 'twat' or a 'cockwomble' -offensive as that is, I wouldn't report anybody for it ever, however, reporting somebody for being a troll when they just disagree with you well, that really is bad form, isn't it? Once again, I am not trolling-just asking for opinions and I've been told that I'm in the wrong. Fair enough.

DeMaz Thu 28-Nov-13 18:42:12

No it's not a pisstake; I am genuinely peed off with him changing tyres, chatting incessantly to people on the street and generally metaphorically saying a big 'f you, you don't matter" to those who pay his wages i.e. those sending and waiting for mail*

Doesn't the postman have to pay other peoples wages too? So really, he could say a big fuck you to the world too!

Sorry OP, I really would love to see things from your point of view but frankly I can't get my head that far up your arse!

Enjoy your fucking letter!

Nomorepat Thu 28-Nov-13 18:45:46

ohfourfoxache, there's nothing at all with people helping others out, but why couldn't he do it in his own time?

Gileswithachainsaw Thu 28-Nov-13 18:50:27

Yes people always need help at convieniently times confused tires set to go flat at 5:02 when people are allowed to help hmm

IneedAsockamnesty Thu 28-Nov-13 18:51:05

I like the sound of your postman

Jux Thu 28-Nov-13 18:54:30

But all those people do pay his wages don't they? Don't they send letters, cards, parcels? Or do know for csure that none of the, ever do? So he's going a bit above and beyond for his customers, fostering good public relations among a lot of people. While delivering mail to you, which he did.

Did your letter say on the envelope "Very important letter. Must be delivered by ....."? If not, how would he know? And if you are usually at work during the day, then usually it wouldn't matter what time he delivered it. Do you expect him to be psychic too, and just know?

Perhaps he could chat with a few people along the way and then maybe he'd find out that you're at home this week waiting for an important, time-sensitive letter, maybe he could do a good deed while he's at it .....

Botanicbaby Thu 28-Nov-13 18:54:56

If this letter was really hmm 'so important/time dependent', then you should have arranged for special delivery by a specific time.

As for asking people not to tweet about this OP, well, you thought it was okay to start a thread about it on an anonymous online forum so you can't really control where it leads. (Penis beaker anyone?)

I think your postie sounds fantastic and wish there were more like him. I agree with many others on this thread that YABVVU*

*Assuming you're not trolling, of course

Heartbrokenmum73 Thu 28-Nov-13 18:55:28

If you had any feeling for anyone other than yourself, OP, you could have bothered to find out why the person with the flat tire needed it doing now.

You have no idea what kind of situation they were in. It may have been an emergency, for all you know. They may have needed to get somewhere ASAP for something urgent. But none of that is relevant to you, is it? On his own time ffs.

If you had not gone out looking for the postie and stayed in, waiting for him to arrive you wouldn't have known any of this. It was your own weird stalkerish behaviour that caused this not the postie doing a kind act.

Would I have cared if my postie had taken longer than I would have liked to deliver my letter. No because I wouldn't have gone looking for him. It was a really stupid thing to do in any case because you could have missed him delivering to your house. There is no obligation to deliver the letters in a particular order so long as they are delivered within the time scale allowed for the round so he could have come from a different direction and on finding you not in, taken your post back to the post office. Or if it weren't signed for, you could have not received it until so late that your vital plans for tomorrow would have changed anyway. You really should have stayed at home, saved all this angst and not wasted your day, moaning on here and generally having a hissy fit.

And if you aren't home most of the time (you said you had a week off work) how do you know that he didn't deliver the post earlier than normal, that today wasn't a light day and he actually had plenty of time to change the tyre and still arrive at the normal time with your post? You have no idea.

Get a life and find something worth worrying about would you. Your attitude stinks.

Rubybrazilianwax Thu 28-Nov-13 19:09:02

Yabu. The post woman and I often have looong chats about furniture diying and painting. One day she came in and I showed her all the painting I was working on.

PennySillin Thu 28-Nov-13 19:10:49

Aww what a lovely postman! Isn't it great to think there are local people out there you can depend on. YABU and a bit of a grump wink

lottieandmia Thu 28-Nov-13 19:11:45

I think that generally YABU because as long as he's delivered all the mail he is supposed to by the end of the day then anything else he chooses to do is fine.

Years ago, I was not happy with a beauty treatment I had that cost £100+. The therapist left me lying on a table 'half done' while she opened the door wide (during the really cold winter we had of sub zero temperatures) and disappeared to look at her father's new car for 20 minutes. She couldn't have cared less about customer service. But that is a very different situation from the one you describe, OP.

fluffaduck Thu 28-Nov-13 19:14:41

OP this has been a harsh thread but in all honesty did you really expect anyone to completely agree with you?
Can you honestly say you were completely in the right to be so hard on what appears to be a kind and conscientious postie?

I would like to think that after this you start to be a little more reasonable and a little less selfish. smile

lottieandmia Thu 28-Nov-13 19:15:27

The people on this thread making loads of personal attacks are not exactly covering themselves in glory either hmm

soverylucky Thu 28-Nov-13 19:15:45

I wish there were more posties like him in the world. It would be a better place. I had a flat tyre once. Luckily for me I was at a garage and a policeman was there. Only he refused to change it because it was not his job to. The forecourt attendant let me use the phone in the shop as I was out of credit to call the AA. Luckily a builder who was on his break heard me make the call . He was in the shop buying a snack and gave up his break to help me out. This was years ago but I have never forgotten his kindness.

LadyBeagleEyes Thu 28-Nov-13 19:16:08

I'm loving this thread.
It is a pisstake isn't it? grin

HungryHorace Thu 28-Nov-13 19:16:22

I think YABU also.

And I wouldn't know where my postman was or what he was doing if he arrived at my house later than usual as I wouldn't go out to hunt him down.

A) I've no doubt he will appear at some point; b) I can't really be arsed to play hunt the postie and c) even if I could be arsed and went out to find out where he was, I know he wouldn't be allowed to hand my post to me anyway, so my effort would have been wasted.

Good on the postie for helping someone is what I say.

(No shorts here, by the way...the NW coast is clearly too cold for exposed flesh!)

lottieandmia Thu 28-Nov-13 19:21:33

Where I live the postmen are in such a rush to finish their rounds that they drive badly and certainly don't stop to help anyone. I think a helpful postman would be a nice thing to have.

WooWooOwl Thu 28-Nov-13 19:27:17

Am I the only one that wants to know what the postman was delivering that was so important that it was worthy of 17 pages?

LCHammer Thu 28-Nov-13 19:31:32

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

HesterShaw Thu 28-Nov-13 19:40:48

Don't assume everyone on mn has children. They don't.

unless the op has said she does in which case I apologise

StrattersCat Thu 28-Nov-13 19:41:44

I'm disappointed sad

I was so sure this thread was either a massive Postman Pat wind up, or Mitmoo had finally snuck back in.

And I was wrong, it's just another hugely unreasonable, self important fool who won't accept they're B massively U.


I think you're still getting the wrong end of the stick OP. People have suggested tweeting the thread to Royal Mail because it is actually good publicity for them. You are the only person on the thread complaining about postal workers, and many other people have given examples about how lovely their posties are and how they really support their local communities.

You seem to think that a thread where literally everyone tells you that you are being a misery over someone managing to squeeze a good deed or two while still doing his job will get him in to trouble. The rest of us think that Royal Mail would be delighted to see so much praise for their employees who do much more than just deliver mail. And it can show them how much their customers value the non-letter based aspects of what many postmen and women do every day.

It's not 'reporting' him so as to get him in to trouble. Sadly, you think it is because you really don't seem to understand that he completely fulfilled his obligation to whoever actually paid for the stamp on the letter you were waiting for.

This could be a fishing thread for some new exciting Postman Pat episodes? Maybe we should start thinking of some daredevil stunts for Jesse to do. grin

ShatnersBassoon Thu 28-Nov-13 19:44:48

Of course this is a piss-take (nobody who seriously thought they weren't being unreasonable would keep coming back to fan the flames), but it's fun to be part of.

Op, I know it's a joke thread, but I would still love to hear your answer to the question I asked a few times - what difference did it make to your day, getting your post later than anticipated?

I need to know, just for fun, so please humour me.

eofa1 Thu 28-Nov-13 19:45:53

Perhaps the OP can call the Daily Mail and be in a sad face photo, holding up her late post?

Ha that made me proper laugh.

I think, in all my time on t'internet, I have never seen such an utterly knobbish thread. Actually feel kind of sorry for the OP. Imaging being that person.

justgirl Thu 28-Nov-13 19:46:28

YABVU! I was stuck once with a burst tyre and i had no clue how to change it (even if i did, I am not strong enough to undo the nuts) a PCSO laid in the road and changed it for me. I was VERY grateful. Its called being a kind citizen.

phantomnamechanger Thu 28-Nov-13 20:16:38

<hijack> could someone please tell me where to find the other thread that has been mentioned a few times on here, about the daughter and the security guard saying how much? TIA

phantomnamechanger Thu 28-Nov-13 20:18:09

OPs name may be Victoria Meldrew?

I can just imagine the curtain twitching, the note taking and the "I don't believe it, he's been talking to MrsX for 3 whole minutes..."

WhereIsMyHat Thu 28-Nov-13 20:21:53

Just pay for special delivery by 9am if it is so bloody important. Sorted.

tracypenisbeaker Thu 28-Nov-13 20:22:10

'Postman Pat, Postman Pat, get in your van and deliver my letter you lazy twat.'

32flavours Thu 28-Nov-13 20:37:34

OP are you Liz Jones?

BigPawsBrown Thu 28-Nov-13 20:39:22

Wonder if you were in the position with flat tyre and no help. You'd want his help!

moldingsunbeams Thu 28-Nov-13 21:59:51

"His job is to deliver mail. Not chat to people in the street."

Do you work? Do you never chat to anyone while you are at work? In the office or whatever. Every office I have ever worked in has! Do you sit at your desk in silence not interact with anyone and not take your breaks.

overfacebook Thu 28-Nov-13 22:00:22

JEEEEZ op, yab sooo u. Do you keep a notebook on the activities of your neighbours and milkman?

Givemeanear Thu 28-Nov-13 22:11:01

He should not give the post, he should put if through the door. That's his job! If you want to be pedantic!

OH is a postman, on tv switch to digital day, he had to help three elderly people do their tuning. Should he have said no?

One did try to give him £5 and a bar if choc as her son told her too, he wouldn't take the fiver, but he took the chocolate grin

Don't be so miserable, sometimes the only person someone sees all day is the postman on his rounds.

trixymalixy Thu 28-Nov-13 22:13:36

YABU, the postie sounds like a lovely guy.

Givemeanear Thu 28-Nov-13 22:26:42

Actually instead of watching him change the tyre bad then talk for 10 mins, could you not of politely approached him during that time and said, could you see if MY VERY IMPORTANT letter is there? He may have been human, recognised you and just given you the letter. Instead you observe for 20 mins! YABVU

MysteriousHamster Thu 28-Nov-13 22:39:25

Hey dude, being a postie is a community job. They have to deliver the post in a day, if he wants to take longer than a few hours and finish later it's up to him.

Your attitude sucks.

Hope that helps.

Beeyump Thu 28-Nov-13 22:40:40

Nomorepat - I didn't really report you as a possible troll because I didn't agree with you (that was a little joke, humour me) but because... I thought you were possibly a troll. Strange, I know!

TheWazzock Thu 28-Nov-13 22:54:12

DH is a postie. He's still wearing shorts I'm very grateful as t'would be a crime to hide his muscly calves which are the result of all that walking grin

It's a tough job and yes he stops to chat to people shock.
He even takes breaks shockshock

As everyone else has said really, if you wanted it delivered for a certain time you should've shelled out for a special delivery.

The postie might've been giving up his break to help the woman change her tyre, what would you have said if you'd gone postie hunting and seen him sitting on a park bench munching a sarnie? Cos he's entitled to do that in his break you know. So is it just the helpfulness you object to?


sweetiepie1979 Thu 28-Nov-13 22:56:34

OP your attitude is shit. Your head is too far up your own arse to think about anybody helping anyone else out. Or that someone might have a bigger problem than you and your letter. It's sad and really annoying that people like you have forgotten community spirit. Reading this thread I see you are in a minority that at least is a positive. Just so your clear, yes YBVU

milkysmum Thu 28-Nov-13 22:59:46

Sounds like a lovely person- you on the other hand op do not! YABU

magicberry Thu 28-Nov-13 23:00:36

Our postie is great. He remembers my name, says hi in the street. He walks bloody fast (and has muscly calves as well). He wears shorts in all weathers because he burns off so much energy - he walks fast, pushes that heavy trolley and carries a heavy bag. yet he has a smile and a wave for everyone.
OP what a miserable attitude.

Fannydabbydozey Thu 28-Nov-13 23:11:56

Just wow.

OP, you make me want to give up my job, become a postie, be YOUR postie where I would skate past your entitled house wearing a tyre on my head and eating cake. I would deliver to your house last. Every single day possible. I'd also piss through your letterbox if I had the right equipment

You can't be real. Can't be. But now every inconsiderate driver, every wanker Parker, every tosser customer, every finger clicking diner etc I see, I will imagine is you. Because that is how you come across.

I actually initially read your username as NOMOREXPAT which I felt explained your entitled spoilt brat behaviour. I lived in Dubai for a couple of years and was surrounded by sour faced, lemon sucking "world revolves around me" types, just like you. Maybe move there. You can't get any fucking post as there are no addresses really. Something you'd be able to really rant about. But I reckon you'd rant about any tiny misjudged slight against yourself.

Jeez, talk about first world problems. "My post was delivered even though my postie changed a tyre and talked to someone. Waaaaaaaaaaaa"

Debs75 Thu 28-Nov-13 23:21:34

Sounds like a lovely postie. When my 73 year old auntie fell this year and broke her arm and ankle her postie completely ignored her and carried on with his round. he didn't ask if she was OK, offer any help or even ring an ambulance for her.
My auntie had to drag herself back onto the kerb and was struggling so long he had finished her street and was on his way back. A neighbour ended up helping her.

I would much rather have a postie like yours then one like my aunties so YABVU

AchyFox Fri 29-Nov-13 00:30:32


Would it still be OK if it was his girlfriend ?

Would it still be OK if it was a male friend ?

Would it still be OK if he was doing a bit of say accounting/ IT moonlighting ?

Slippery slope.

ZombieMojaveWonderer Fri 29-Nov-13 06:43:54

If I had a flat tire I would be so grateful for any help. Your postie sounds lovely. YABVU and mean spirited!

Sirzy Fri 29-Nov-13 06:48:59

Achy - I couldn't care less who he was helping. Not sure why someone sex would have any bearing on it at all

DropYourSword Fri 29-Nov-13 07:10:52

I'm genuinely astonished that people who hold this sort of opinion exist OP. You are truly breathtaking.

I think in future you should cut out using the mail service and do it yourself. See how far your 30 / 40p gets you. "Paying their wages" bullshit...that wouldn't even pay to get me to the end of my road!

AND, however long it takes for him to deliver your letter, the contents remain the same. Exam results, job acceptance letters don't spontaneously change I'd they are delivered half an hour late.

You are TRULY unbelievable!

Gileswithachainsaw Fri 29-Nov-13 07:20:45


If he was taking a legally entitled to break it wouldn't matter who it was.

AndyWarholsBanana Fri 29-Nov-13 08:38:30

Our postie is fecking gorgeous. He can change my tyre anytime. Maybe I should tamper with the engine and then ask him to have a feel under my bonnet?

PresidentServalan Fri 29-Nov-13 08:41:45

YANBU - that would piss me off too - he should be doing his job.

BitOutOfPractice Fri 29-Nov-13 08:47:44

Gosh the OP's world is a happy place isn't it?

Trills Fri 29-Nov-13 08:53:47

Nobody has mentioned the 93% yet?

Royal Mail's target is to deliver 93% of first class post the next day.

So even if they are operating as they should, that's a 1 in 14 chance that you won't get your letter at all that day.

Comparing delivering post to working behind a counter or in a shop or at a restaurant doesn't work- it's not a job where you are paid for a certain amount of time, it's a job where you are paid for a certain amount of stuff done.

As long as all post is delivered that day (probably by certain deadline, but that could be 6pm) then he can do it in whatever order he likes and spend as much time as he likes on "distractions" as long as it is DONE by the end of the day.

Trills Fri 29-Nov-13 08:55:40

I have a small amount of sympathy - if I were waiting for an important letter and I could see the postie meandering up the other side of the street slowly I would feel deliver to MEEEEEE next but I'd acknowledge that I was unreasonable.

Your subsequent posts rather evaporated that sympathy though.

TiggyD Fri 29-Nov-13 08:57:48

I'm with the OP. What a horrible world we would be living in if people gave each other help when they needed it. Crime would stop. Wars would end. The Israeli President would french kiss the leader of Hamas. Poverty would be no more. That's what Love-A-Lot Bear wanted. Disgusting.

Mignonette Fri 29-Nov-13 08:59:48

My god If I had only stuck to 'my job' as in the contract my clients would have been all the worse off. It was not in my 'job description' to connect washing machines, do shopping, round up thirty feral cats found in a clients house, clean windows, go crabbing.......The World goes round and kindness prevails because people are not jobsworths.

Extraordinarily concrete ideation by the OP.

Nomorepat Fri 29-Nov-13 09:19:52

TiggyD you really think wars would end, they wouldn't. Most people who start wars think they are doing the right thing. For the 'good' of the people. The road to hell is paved with good intentions.

Once again, before somebody does tweet this thread or something similar, please don't: it doesn't really matter to me because I am anonymous and the postie is anonymous, too, however, I will say this about Royal Mail: they will not take kindly to it.

There will be more 'your job is to deliver the mail, not do x, y, or z' notices sent around to postman. Remember, their drive is profit, not kindness.

See what I mean about the road to hell? Ironically, by tweeting this, you will be helping to stop acts of kindness.

StrattersCat Fri 29-Nov-13 09:25:53

No they won't, a postman is required to deliver the letters, within the timeframe of that day, he's also legally entitled to take a break when he needs one. Postmen aren't sat in a little office, and able to nip out for a sandwich and a coffee when it's their legally entitled break. They're allowed to take it when they want. Their job is to deliver the letters they are given to deliver, they have a shift they're assigned to, but they don't have to get the post delivered within that shift, they just have to get the post delivered.

Your postman did nothing wrong. Give up, it's getting tedious, and you are showing yourself up.

ChristmasCareeristBitchNigel Fri 29-Nov-13 09:31:16

I work in the police. I spent a considerable amount of time going out of my way to do something not related to my specific job for a domestic violence victim. No doubt the OP would have thought it was an outrageous waste of time for which i was not employed

Still got a commendation from our divisonal chief superintendant and a letter to the chief constable from my HOD about it. So no, not every employer would be angry at you spending work time doing something not entirely in your JD

Nomorepat - are you going to tell us what was so world-shatteringly important about this letter, that you couldn't wait an extra half an hour for it?

I suspect you won't - because it wasn't actually that life-alteringly vital, and you know you would look like a tit for making such a fuss about it.

Nomorepat Fri 29-Nov-13 09:40:39

Actually, Achycat makes a very interesting point here: everybody is saying IABU because he was changing somebody's tyre; it's an act of kindness and all that. OK.

But what if this his bit-on-the-side? Would you be so forgiving then?
If I had said, 'he was changing the tyre of the woman he is having an affair with'? reactions would have been different, although, of course, in his eyes it would have been an act of kindness to the woman he was having an affair with.

We're all different in what we see as acts of kindness, aren't we? I don't think there's any argument to be had on that issue-we just are.

And this is precisely why Royal Mail wouldn't take kindly to it: every postie carrying out acts of kindness would be doing so at their own subjective reasoning, not royal mail's.

Another aspect that has not been considered here is this:

The reason companies don't take kindly to postie's changing tyres is that he could have injured himself doing so and been unable to deliver the mail at all.

So, the idea that Royal Mail would take kindly to his actions is not true.

BarfaStewart Fri 29-Nov-13 09:43:25


Vast Majority: Yes, YABU.

OP: No I'm not!! How dare you!

Vast Majority: Why did you ask then?

One Poster: Actually, YANBU...

OP: Ha! See, IANBU at all

Bowlersarm Fri 29-Nov-13 09:45:08

But he wasn't changing the wheel of a woman he was having an affair with so don't try and justify your mean mindedness with a fake scenario, OP.

Sirzy Fri 29-Nov-13 09:45:26

I really wouldn't care what he realtionship with the person he was helping was. If someone needs help then the KIND thing to do is stop and help them.

And your right, of course royal mail would HATE to see people talking so positvely about their employees wouldn't they.

The reason companies don't take kindly to postie's changing tyres is that he could have injured himself doing so and been unable to deliver the mail at all. well in that case they better wrap them in cotton wool 24/7 hadn't they, make them live in a cupboard when not delivering - although how they could guarantee no injuries just walking who knows.

You really are getting daft now!

400 odd posts and I still don't know what the important letter was about. sad

<Cunningly marks place for bun fight deletion message.--

Sorry obviously couldn't decide whether to use < > or -- -- there. blush

What do you want, OP? Do you honestly think that if you keep banging on about this long enough, we will all come round to your point of view, and agree that the evil postman should not have done a deed of altruistic kindness when he should have been delivering your frightfully important letter?

Ain't gonna happen, love. Just because two posters have agreed that YANBU, doesn't mean the majority are about to change their views. We are just mourning the fact that there are more people out there who don't want altruism and kindness in the world - not if it inconveniences them!!

Nomorepat Fri 29-Nov-13 09:50:50

Sirzy no it's not daft at all: there is a difference between getting injured doing what you are employed to do in this case perhaps postie slipping on the pavement during his job and getting injured doing what you are Not employed to do i.e. changing tyres.

The former is unavoidable the other most certainly is avoidable.

Bowlersarms how do you know he wasn't? Anyway, he may not have been nevertheless the point remains, if he was in his eyes he'd be being kind.

BarfaStewart Fri 29-Nov-13 09:51:29

My postman has just been, he gave me my letters, then we had a really nice chat. Next he will go around the sheltered bungalows around the corner, in our small, not terribly well-connected village. He will chat to every person he sees, and make some very lonely OAPs very happy.

Thank god there are more like him!

BarfaStewart Fri 29-Nov-13 09:52:28

And of course it doesn't matter who it was. It is still a good deed, regardless.

Sirzy Fri 29-Nov-13 09:53:09

but he could change a tyre after his shift and get injured - so do you want to provide postmen with a list of what they can and can't do at any time incase they get injured and mean you have to wait for a different postman to be free to deliver your post?

Preciousbane Fri 29-Nov-13 09:53:59

Seems a bit desperate asking if we would feel the same if he was having an affair with her.

Nomorepat Fri 29-Nov-13 09:54:43

BarfarStewart seriously? So if he was having an affair with this woman, it would be OK in your eyes, then? I don't buy that for one second. Sorry.

Everybody's got their different views on acts of kindness, don't they? Postie gets carte blanche to do acts of kindness.

'Sorry, boss, only being kind to my bit on the side'.

Sirzy Fri 29-Nov-13 09:56:42

what relationship he had with her if any is irrelevant. Someone was struggling he helped her. He was kind, you are simply carrying on showing how self centred you are.

I hope if you ever have a flat tyre the postman walks past and leaves you stranded. Wouldn't want him stopping being kind incase people complained or assumed you were having an affair with him.

Nomorepat Fri 29-Nov-13 09:57:57

Sirzy I don't want to give anybody a list: not my place, but I'm pretty sure 'changing tyres' is not on an approved royal mail list.

The road to hell is paved with good intentions, isn't it? Pretty young girl flashes eyes at postie, he changes her tyre, gets injured, and 20 people don't get that important letter.

BarfaStewart Fri 29-Nov-13 09:58:06

Having an affair wouldn't be ok.

If he was popping in for a quickie, it wouldn't be ok.

But he wasn't. He was changing a tyre. Regardless of whose it was, it is still a good deed. There is nothing for you to "buy", your view is different to that of others. Don't assume that other people have the same ethics and vision of what constitutes a good deed. If I say "it doesn't matter to me", then it doesn't matter to me.

CaptainSinker Fri 29-Nov-13 09:58:30

OP - have you considered masturbating more often? I really think this could be the solution.

Nomorepat Fri 29-Nov-13 09:58:39

I hope he leaves me stranded, too, seriously, I'd rather he got on with his job.

BarfaStewart Fri 29-Nov-13 10:00:00

And actually, the road to hell is built on mistrust, selfishness and indignation.

One good deed deserves another.

Spartak Fri 29-Nov-13 10:01:18

So lets turn around the "having an affair" scenario.

What if he was changing the tyre for someone who needed to get to hospital to see a dying relative for the last time. Would he still be an arse then?

Why are you avoiding answering the question about what was in this important letter?

BarfaStewart Fri 29-Nov-13 10:02:14

Maybe it was a job offer from the Royal Mail? grin

Nomorepat Fri 29-Nov-13 10:02:38

BarfaStewart you have no idea what his motivations were for changing that tyre, nor do I.

And this is kind of the point: it appears kind to you, but maybe he was just trying to get inside her underwear.

The bottom line is this: employers cannot allow people carte blanche to carry out subjective acts of kindness or we'd never get any mail.

EauRouge Fri 29-Nov-13 10:02:44

He must have been delivering you a new kidney the way you are carrying on.

Mckayz Fri 29-Nov-13 10:03:18

He changed a bloody tire, you got your post so why the fuck are you still going on??

Unless the person posting the letter pays for before 1pm delivery, Royal Mail say that post is not late unless it arrives after 4pm. So he wasn't even late.


SaggyOldClothCatPuss Fri 29-Nov-13 10:04:29

This is the Royal Mail you are talking about? You'll be lucky if you get your letter at all! "They aim to deliver 93% of first class mail the next day", yeah, 93% of what they don't steal, lose or send to completely the wrong area!
My postman turns up whenever the hell he likes, leaves all of his parcels in the depot and just sticks a card through the letter box!
If he's doing something positive for somebody then so what? There's more to life than being a fecking jobsworth. If your letter is that important, then it should have been sent special delivery!
Get a grip and stop being such a misery!

fluffaduck Fri 29-Nov-13 10:06:48

Good morning postie lovers smile

Just read the latest posts and have I missed one?
Is the postman now having an affair?
Has OP admitted she IBU or is she grasping on to the 3 posts out of 300 that agree with her?

<gets comfy with a cuppa awaiting next incident in postie gate>

Nomorepat Fri 29-Nov-13 10:06:51

Never thought there might be a connection to your postman turning up whenever the hell he likes and him doing something 'positive' for somebody, SaggyOldClothCatPuss?

Maybe your's is like mine: doing 'good deeds' all day instead of delivering the post.

Nomorepat Fri 29-Nov-13 10:09:37

Spartak because I've been told that what was in my letter is irrelevant by the posters here. That's why. Because his doing 'good deeds' is more important than my peace of mind (or any other poor bugger waiting for the mail).

Sirzy Fri 29-Nov-13 10:10:22

If the postman was having an affair surely they would have disappeared inside for a quickie rather than standing outside talking?

BarfaStewart Fri 29-Nov-13 10:11:56

It doesn't matter what his motivations were. If you didn't receive your post, I would have more sympathy. But you did. And he helped someone in need. Whether it was so they could rush to hospital, go shopping or meet their lover in the lane for a quickie, it doesn't negate the good deed.

It's the action that matters, not the motivation.

EauRouge Fri 29-Nov-13 10:12:30

What time did the letter arrive, OP?

fluffaduck Fri 29-Nov-13 10:18:05

If you hadn't of gone looking for your postie, which by the way is weirdly stalkerish you would be non the wiser and would of just excepted that your letter arrived at the time it did.

I just cannot understand why you are so arsey that your letter arrived 1/2 an hour later than if he hadn't of helped. Did that delay make such a difference?
Was the letter written in magic ink that would disappear by a certain time mission impossible style?

Out of interest OP (and apologies if this has been asked already as have only skimmed through). if your important letter had arrived on time so you could go and do whatever you needed to do and you had then stepped outside only to discover you had a flat tyre and the kind postie had offered to fix it would you have refused his help ?

desertgirl Fri 29-Nov-13 10:19:19

OP, he is entitled to a break, just like anyone else, if he wanted to pop home for a 'quicky', why would that be a problem? I work in an office, I have popped out to sort my own car problems in work time before; the people who pay me have never objected. Seriously, I don't think anyone goes to work in the morning, does and says nothing outside their job description for 8 hours straight, and goes home. Do you?

(And disagree entirely with the comments upthread about Dubai; maybe it is like that in the new shiny expat enclaves, but it's not the city I've lived in, blinglessly, for almost 12 years)

hareinthemoon Fri 29-Nov-13 10:20:45

Wow. This is still going?

We need a new Topic heading, IANBU, for people who aren't really asking a question.

cardamomginger Fri 29-Nov-13 10:21:10

Not read the whole thread. Actually think YANBU. He is being paid to do a job and should do it. He is not beign paid to be a generally helpful person in the community who does whatever needs doing, includign delivering the post.

If there is an emergency that he comes across on his rounds, it's nice that he's not so much of a jobsworth that he won't help. If the tyre change had been urgent - e.g. she had to get to a hospital appointment, then great and fine. But chatting for 10 minutes afterwards suggests it was not an emergency.

diaimchlo Fri 29-Nov-13 10:21:47

Oh dear OP what a sad life you must lead..... you seem to spend your time when not at work holding a stopwatch and timing your posties activities.... something not quite right there confused. Please do bear in mind that you also took up his valuable posting time by telling him what you thought about his kindness.

OP: no I'm not <throws dummy out of pram>

May I respectively request that all posters send the OP new dummies via 1st class Royal Mail today so that they will hopefully arrive tomorrow, as she is at home, so that she can wait for important mail to replace all those that she has thrown out of her pram over the last couple of days.

I hope your important letter included a heart as you appear to have a swinging brick.

fluffaduck Fri 29-Nov-13 10:26:06

The OP received her letter around 15 minutes or so after he changed the tyre. It was not on a timed delivery so what difference did it actually make?
The postie is paid to do a job and the postie did do it. HE DELIVERED THE LETTER!!!

whatsthatcomingoverthehill Fri 29-Nov-13 10:28:02

"Children often seek negative attention when they don’t receive enough of the positive kind. Although being scolded and punished is usually unpleasant, the child feels validated by this negative reinforcement and may seek more. This pattern often starts a cycle wherein a child’s disobedience and poor behavior escalates because he or she wants additional attention."

Poor OP clearly doesn't receive any positive attention.

Nomorepat Fri 29-Nov-13 10:30:00

cardamomginger Exactly, it was hardly an emergency.

Think too many people think that being postman is not a proper job but a kind of trivial job where he floats about helping people out.

Ironically, they're being disrespectful to postman everywhere because if I said to an IT consultant 'can't you fit in good deeds during your day?' they'd tell me that their job was far too important for that and while they'd love to...etc etc

I'm the one who is actually taking his job seriously here, but I'm the bad guy grin

BarfaStewart Fri 29-Nov-13 10:32:22

No, people actually know what his job entails, and as long as he does it - there's no problem.

He did his job.

fluffaduck Fri 29-Nov-13 10:35:51

You seem to ignore all the posters who disagree with you then you dive open armed on the odd one out of 300 that agrees with you!
You asked if you were being unreasonable the majority vote is YES accept it and move on.

You got your letter. The world didn't end.

Mignonette Fri 29-Nov-13 11:03:31

My second ever biscuit.

puntasticusername Fri 29-Nov-13 11:12:01

Actual lol @ CaptainSinker @9.58 (which was not easy to explain to DS grin)

Excellent thread, loving it.

ElfontheShelfIsWATCHINGYOUTOO Fri 29-Nov-13 11:12:02

Faverolles did that same community whip round and write to post office in support of him? Sign a petition?

Anyway our post is erractic, i am lucky if it makes it into my post box and not the sqaut next door where I may never see it again.

Its really sad to cristise someone fixing a bike, as long as the post gets delivered I cannot see the problem.

As for time reliant mail, mail is mail, whoever set the time limit on you getting it was at fault.

bragmatic Fri 29-Nov-13 11:38:16

Do you have a dog? If not, get one. Then it can bite the bastard.

Sirzy Fri 29-Nov-13 11:42:03

I think the only person being disrespectful to the post man is you.

Oh and I also think any nice it consultant who looked out of his office window and saw someone struggling to change a tyre would go out and try to help if they were able to.

Kindness isn't defined by your job, but by your actions.

extracrunchy Fri 29-Nov-13 11:46:42

Postman Pat helps out with all kinds of s**t. YABU.

Spartak Fri 29-Nov-13 12:00:22

Anyone else still wondering what was in the letter?


BlueSkySunnyDay Fri 29-Nov-13 12:15:37

Only just read more of this thread ROFL at Wille's "you're going to have to wait a little longer op, he's got to find a lost toy first" [GRIN] [GRIN] [GRIN] [GRIN]

BlueSkySunnyDay Fri 29-Nov-13 12:16:53

That should have been grin grin grin grin


It's amazing how the OP (and now cardamom) haven't been able to grasp that the postman did his job. He wasn't helping people instead of doing it; he did that as well as doing it. It's really not a difficult concept.

Nor is the idea that he can use his break time however he likes: changing tyres, eating sandwiches, shagging his mistress. It really isn't any of my business. His wife can be pissed off about the mistress stuff, but it really isn't anything to do with me.

I am actually saddened that people like the OP exist. The whole 'road to hell is paved with good intentions' thing has now meant that I can only think of her as Grahame coats from Neil gaiman's anansi boys. Hopefully she's not actually that bad.

KidLorneRoll Fri 29-Nov-13 12:19:28

If you needed something delivered at a specific time, you should have paid extra for a guaranteed delivery service.

Suggesting that a postie shouldn't stop and help someone in need is dickish.

BlueSkySunnyDay Fri 29-Nov-13 12:30:18

fluffaduck " is she grasping on to the 3 posts out of 300 that agree with her"


I expect she was waiting for the Daxon catalogue supplement, its very exciting you know wink

So is the gist of it that the op was out looking for the postie wow I cant remember the last time anything that important came through the traditional

AndyWarholsBanana Fri 29-Nov-13 12:35:04

OP, you're actually starting to sound a bit deranged now. Bet Christmas is fun in your house.

stealthsquiggle Fri 29-Nov-13 12:36:55

"HesterShaw Thu 28-Nov-13 14:36:02: Ok OP, you need to be nicer. HTH"


Our postman chats his way gently through his round, checks on people, gives me parcels if he happens to see me elsewhere, occasionally signs for things on our behalf, is always smiling and friendly, and goes home at the end of his round to look after his elderly mother and his bee hives. In an extremely rural community he is very much a member of that community, as are the people who run the sub post office. Which is why Royal Mail still needs some protection from the full cold wind of market forces. OP maybe next time you should use one of the courier companies which think they can compete - see what their customer service is like and then see how you feel about your friendly local postman.

MysteriousHamster Fri 29-Nov-13 12:47:16

fyi OP he wasn't let. So er, get over yourself?

MysteriousHamster Fri 29-Nov-13 12:47:31

*late, I hate my keyboard.

AndyWarholsBanana Fri 29-Nov-13 12:53:16

My colleagues and I are currently happily sitting at work discussing bum sex, strap ons and nipple clamps. My boss obviously isn't fussed as she's sitting here as well. Do you really think that everyone spends their entire working hours literally doing nothing but work?

reelingintheyears Fri 29-Nov-13 13:09:25

The road to hell is paved with good intentions

The meaning of the phrase is that individuals may have the intention to undertake good actions but nevertheless fail to take action. This inaction may be due to procrastination, laziness or other subversive vice. As such, the saying is an admonishment that a good intention is meaningless unless followed through, which is notoriously difficult for common good intentions such as losing

So, the postman did a good thing and is not on the road to hell after all, he was not a lazy, uncaring meanie, he was a good Samaritan!

BarfaStewart Fri 29-Nov-13 13:16:25

Reeling, yep! I prefer "do unto others" myself.

Gileswithachainsaw Fri 29-Nov-13 13:18:59


Well it is Friday so that's ok grin

Ok, so you like a what if do you Pat and sorry if this have been done already, I got bored reading everyone agreeing that yabu and other not seeing it. So here it is ....... What if that girl with the flat tyre had just been told a kidney was available and she had to get to hospital, what if she had had a call saying a relative was in hospital and needed her, what then, would you expect her to be left without help so you don't miss a bloody letter that you received anyway?? And the person he was talking to, what if he was asking the post man if he had seen a young girl that needed help? What if he was saying thank you for helping his relatives in their time of need?

You just assumed your letter was more important than anything else happening today, what an utterly self centred way to live your life. And yes, I wouldn't mind my post being late if I knew it meant someone else being safe, it's called human kindness you might want to look that up!

ghostonthecanvas Fri 29-Nov-13 13:44:10

shock can't believe this is still going. I have a funny feeling this may end up in classics.

Nomorepat Fri 29-Nov-13 14:01:12

OK, well since I started this thread, I feel it's fitting that I invoke Godwin's law grin

reelingintheyears, I disagree Hitler had -in his eyes not any rational human beings' eyes- good intentions and he followed them through.

And I'm not saying my postman is on the road to hell at all; just that situations arise that are negative based upon the good intentions of others.

He probably meant well, but what if he had injured his hand? How would he explain it away to his boss-remember, changing tyres would not be described as being 'injured whilst carrying out job' like slipping on a pavement might be. He'd have been disciplined. Simple as that.

Also, his good intention would have led to the post not being delivered that day; who would cover for him at such short notice? So everybody in my street misses out on important mail for his 'good works'. hmm

If he had been injured by slipping on the pavement, I wouldn't moan as that would have been unavoidable.

Sirzy Fri 29-Nov-13 14:02:25

But he wasn't hurt, you did get your post. You need to get over yourself and stop trying to make out that someone being kind is unreasonable. It isn't.

NurseRoscoe Fri 29-Nov-13 14:08:11

I would of been annoyed if he was dawdling, having a fag or going for a pint or something lol not if he was helping someone who needed it.

reelingintheyears Fri 29-Nov-13 14:12:24

Fucking hell

You are using the saying wrongly.

Your Postman is not Hitler and if he'd injured his hand you'd have shock horror, had to wait till someone else could do his round.

Nomorepat Fri 29-Nov-13 14:17:15

No, I am afraid that you are using the saying wrongly, reelingintheyears, Hitler -deranged as he was - had good intentions in what he did-he wanted to create a super-race.

I cannot stress how evil I think Hitler was; in his own mind, though, he was doing the right thing i.e. he had good intentions.

Let's imagine you were married to this postman (just for a second or two) and he came in having injured his hand having changed somebody's tyre.

I'd feel sick to the stomach because I would know that Royal Mail would come down on him hard and he wouldn't get paid.

Being kind hmm

Blondeshavemorefun Fri 29-Nov-13 14:19:09

What a lovely postie

I would like to think if I was stuck and needed a tyre changed and a man (sexist sorry I know) walked past me he would help

Some people like to help others and he went an extra mile

D0oinMeCleanin Fri 29-Nov-13 14:19:18

Our old postie used to have sight problems. Say if we lived in no 10, we'd sometimes get our own letters, sometimes we would get letters for 110 or number 01. Often we'd get letters for number 3 or 35 or various other random houses that have numbers not even remotely close to no. 10.

The new one is always late, but he can see so I is happy. As long as he delivers the right mail, to the right house at some point during the day, then he can do what he wants afaic.

Gileswithachainsaw Fri 29-Nov-13 14:22:56

Oh ffs you get more and more deranged.

Like you would give a shit if he hurt himself changing the tyre. Don't make out you would care about how work would treat him.

reelingintheyears Fri 29-Nov-13 14:23:20

Hitler did not have good intentions, he had bad intentions, he was a mad man and wanted to eradicate whole races of people.

You cannot compare, comparisons are odious is another saying.

reelingintheyears Fri 29-Nov-13 14:24:34

Look up Godwins law.

reelingintheyears Fri 29-Nov-13 14:25:03

Bows out of discussion.

21 pages in and we've gone from postie not doing his job to hitler had good intentions.

Is it a full moon? has the world actually started revolving around the OP? am I the only sane person left on the planet?

Can we get back to postman pat and Jesse the cat please, at least that had some normality about it.

EauRouge Fri 29-Nov-13 14:26:09

Hitler? Just when I thought this thread couldn't get any more ridiculous.

Gileswithachainsaw Fri 29-Nov-13 14:27:30


Chippednailvarnish Fri 29-Nov-13 14:30:15

Hitler had good intentions.

Of course he did Pet, he was nothing but sweetness and light and he was only deranged on the occasional off day.

A bit similar to you and your concern about the postman's uninjured hand.

You are clearly having a similar off day to Hitler.

BarfaStewart Fri 29-Nov-13 14:30:45

No, you are using it wrongly not that you will ever admit to it and again with the what ifs. He didn't pop for a quickie, he didn't hurt himself, he didn't try to create a super-race and he didn't post dog shit through your door. He delivered your mail on time, in good condition and he possibly made someones day. I notice you don't address the people asking what if the person he helped needed to get to hospital etc.

You are being unreasonable. Accept it. Move on and try to be a bit more understanding and kinder in future. What a bleak world if none of us helped each other or spoke while working.

extracrunchy Fri 29-Nov-13 14:34:15

I think this is the weirdest thread I've ever read. OP, wtaf??

I don't think YABU actually. Maybe she couldn't go to Halfords or Kwik-Fit because the tyre fitters there pop out to deliver pamphlets for a local cat charity at regular intervals.

Gileswithachainsaw Fri 29-Nov-13 14:39:32

Or perhaps they just wouldn't come and get her because that would mean leaving the premesis and they might hurt their hand towing the car mackeral

StrattersCat Fri 29-Nov-13 14:52:46

Fucking hell, this just gets more and more batshit shock

Somebody needs therapy, imo. And it ain't me.

Beeyump Fri 29-Nov-13 14:54:40

How did we get from Postman Pat to Hitler, how??!

Good intentions Beeyump, and something to do with paving and a man in a red suit with horns.

fluffaduck Fri 29-Nov-13 14:58:48

Ok so I have been out for a few hours and I have come back to Hitler and an injured postie!!!!
I don't know, you leave mumsnet alone for a few hours and it all goes tits up!

Has the OP admitted she was being unreasonable yet or is she still fighting her corner?

Gileswithachainsaw Fri 29-Nov-13 15:00:23

Oh she still thinks she's not being unreasonable only now she's pretending it's out of concern

Beeyump It is Godwin's Law

It states: "As an online discussion grows longer, the probability of a comparison involving Nazis or Hitler approaches 1."[2][3] In other words, Godwin said that, given enough time, in any online discussion—regardless of topic or scope—someone inevitably makes a comparison to Hitler or the Nazis.

has any one thought of the children?

fluffaduck Fri 29-Nov-13 15:03:15

Concern for her mail or the postman?

Why concern for the postie, he's a grown up. Can make decisions regarding his own personal safety. What the frick has it got to do with the OP?
Plus I do still find it really strange that she went looking for him. I think if he knew he may need to get an injunction out on her then she would never get her bloody mail grin

Gileswithachainsaw Fri 29-Nov-13 15:09:04


More likely to injur himself running from creepy stalkers than changing a tyre.

Or falling over drunk. But that's ok cos it was in his own time and he was paying the bar staffs wages grin

The OP must have been hanging around watching him for quite a while to know that he spent so long changing a tyre and then 10 mins talking.

That's very scary behaviour and I am very concerned for the Postie, it can't be nice for him being watched so intently.

diaimchlo Fri 29-Nov-13 15:20:10


Would you be holding the same concern if he had tripped on your ie: doorstep/doormat and knocked himself out before you got your ever so important, life changing letter through your letterbox??? From your posts I think you would have just looked through the letters the poor man is clasping in his twisted hand and ripped yours out, turned around and closed your front door.

Hitler fgs!!!!!! Please seek some therapy there must be some out there.

I don't think he was changing a tyre, I think he ducked behind the car to escape the OP.

reelingintheyears Fri 29-Nov-13 15:25:36

<<Sneaking back in>>

The law is sometimes invoked, as a rule, to mark the end of a discussion when a Nazi analogy is made, with the writer who made the analogy being considered to have lost the argument.

reelingintheyears Fri 29-Nov-13 15:26:11

<<fucks back off>>

EauRouge Fri 29-Nov-13 15:31:04

I think the OP lost the argument in her opening post.

Nomorepat Fri 29-Nov-13 15:32:25

No, Hitler -deranged as he was- thought that he was doing the right thing. In his own mind, he was acting out of genuine goodness and good intentions.

Just because the rest of the world-correctly IMO- disagreed with him doesn't mean to say that he didn't in his own mind have good intentions.

Look up Messiah complex for goodness sake

desertgirl Fri 29-Nov-13 15:33:42

Why in the name of creation would an employer come down hard on someone injuring himself in a break from work, carrying out a perfectly normal activity (it's hardly an extreme sport, you don't need special insurance or anything...). OP do you live in the same world as me?

Gileswithachainsaw Fri 29-Nov-13 15:36:10

And now she defends the hitler comparison. confused

This thread has had me in hysterics for two days now. Thank you op for the entertainment.

ShatnersBassoon Fri 29-Nov-13 15:38:40

OP, please humour me and answer the question I asked a few times.

What difference did it make to your day, getting your post delivered later than anticipated?

No need to mention Nazism or Hitler in your answer, although it would be good if you could.

Nomorepat Fri 29-Nov-13 15:40:15

desertgirl because he wasn't on a break from work.

Don't know what world you live in, but the world where I live in a person who gets injured through carrying out a non-work -related activity during the hours they should be working usually gets a rap on the knuckles from their employer.

For example, if an office worker nips out to deliver leaflets not related to his work during his work hours and injures himself, you can bet your life that his employer will be doing their damnedest to stop his/her sick pay.