What do I get nanny for Christmas?

(51 Posts)
mamayaya Wed 20-Nov-13 21:51:14

Sorry am crap and can't find the chat or Christmas sections!

Nanny has been fab. Only does after school 4 days a wk, 1 dd and only since September but I split up with partner a month ago and she has been great - extra hours (paid for obviously!) as he wasn't there when would have been previously, really flexible. And so sweet and nice.

She is 23, works as teaching assistant in a primary in mornings, and is a pretty cool girl, has a bit of an Afro going on, cool clothes. Lives at home with her dad. (Ie I don't know what accessories/bracelet I thought initially to get her as is frankly cooler than me and no stuff for house).

My budget is a bit limited due to split, I would like to spend £30 if poss but will go a bit more and up to £50 if necessary.

Any ideas?! I am at a loss and only coming up with vouchers or cash. I gave her £20 for her birthday recently and she said she hadn't received any presents from family (think they may be Jehovah's witnesses) so i would quite like to buy her something nice...

Thanks for any ideas in advance!

ConventGarden Wed 20-Nov-13 21:54:33

90% vouchers and 10% a thoughtful chosen gift from you xx

stoopstofolly Wed 20-Nov-13 21:55:00

Presents are nice if you can think of something perfect for them- but I'm never that organised! I've given my nanny (also after school 4 days per week!) £50 M&S vouchers for the last few years. I know she appreciates being able to buy what she wants with them.

gordyslovesheep Wed 20-Nov-13 21:55:10

ask her?

Catnap26 Wed 20-Nov-13 21:58:44

Cinema vouchers?

FortyDoorsToNowhere Wed 20-Nov-13 22:00:59

I would say cash in a nice Christmas card.

Catnap26 Wed 20-Nov-13 22:01:11

Love to shop vouchers?covers lots of things then.i think vouchers is the way to go that way she can get what she wants.also perhaps get your dd to make something for her,it will be nice and personal.

NomDeClavier Wed 20-Nov-13 22:01:14

Tough one! I see why you want to give her a physical gift although usually vouchers/cash is appreciated. What about something everyone needs but nice, like pens or notebook?

Agree with CoventGarden- mostly vouchers but something small and thoughtful from you and DD.

Definitely a homemade, sparkly, gluey, messy, lovely card from DD!

Caitlin17 Wed 20-Nov-13 22:05:31

To be honest, unless the vouchers are for shops she really, really likes I'd give a Christmas cash bonus and a box of chocolates/ bottle of wine. She won't be earning much and if it were me I'd prefer she can get something she really wants. Thats what I did when I had a full time nanny.

mamayaya Wed 20-Nov-13 22:19:35

Oh my god thank you for so many replies! Been doing my ironing. In my dressing gown. With a glass of red wine. Being a single mum is ok.

So if I give her say £30 cash plus say a nice diary as know she uses one and a bottle of wine and a home-made card from dd that is good??

Caitlin17 Wed 20-Nov-13 22:23:44

That sounds good. I honest think a cash bonus is fine for the main gift.

Catnap26 Wed 20-Nov-13 22:23:48

I would be pretty chuffed with that smile

foreverondiet Wed 20-Nov-13 22:28:52

Money, I think convention is to give extra weeks salary.

mamayaya Wed 20-Nov-13 22:35:21

I think a week's salary is beyond my means.... I pay her cash in hand (at her request) but have paid her when we were on holiday, when dd was sick and me off work so didn't need her and when exp has picked her up from school instead of normal 6pm so don't feel I'm tight in general, just a bit pushed at present as am paying her alone plus all bills. My ex is unreliable to say the least confused

What about say topshop or house of Fraser vouchers? I am feeling major stress about this for some reason - prob as no 'd'p to buy for! Thanks for advice..!

Caitlin17 Wed 20-Nov-13 22:44:10

I honestly can't remember how much I gave, it might have been as much as a week's salary, but my situation was different. When I had nannies they were full time employees who only worked for me, they paid tax and I paid employer's NI and OH and I both worked full-time.

What you suggested, £30 and a nice gift sounds fine. I really wouldn't go down the voucher route.

Talkinpeace Wed 20-Nov-13 22:48:20

I pay her cash in hand (at her request)
hate to put a damper but be VERY careful as you are not in compliance with employment law

Caitlin17 Wed 20-Nov-13 22:57:04

Talkinpeace, not necessarily, it depends on whether the girl is an employee. When DS was too old to need a full time nanny but still needed after school collection we used a nanny who was legitimately self employed and worked for at least 2 other families who also didn't need full time care.She paid her own tax and self employed NI.

Talkinpeace Thu 21-Nov-13 12:40:37

we are drifting rapidly O/T but its an important issue.
If you pay somebody cash in hand who works for you, YOU are the one potentially committing the offence if checked.
If they are self employed, ask for their UTR and a written receipt, even if paying cash.
Tie up your camel, THEN trust in Allah

cingolimama Thu 21-Nov-13 12:45:08

The best gift from an employer is always CASH!!!!

hettienne Thu 21-Nov-13 12:49:04

A regular job working 4 days a week will be an employed position - it doesn't matter that it is part time or if she has another job.

OP - if you are paying her illegally then be very careful, it is you that can be caught and fined not her.

valiumredhead Thu 21-Nov-13 13:32:56

Cash, always!grin in a lovely xmas card.

luckylavender Thu 21-Nov-13 13:49:25

If she's a Jehovah's Witness then a present and a card may not be at all appropriate. Ditto wine.

WaitMonkey Thu 21-Nov-13 13:50:11

I like your idea and Topshop vouchers would be good.

Pigsmummy Thu 21-Nov-13 20:40:27

Cash. That never offends

Beastofburden Thu 21-Nov-13 21:10:40

Cash and diary sound good. Wine, as long as it won't cause ructions with her dad.

But you ought to be paying tax and NI - she is so not self employed.

BABaracus Thu 21-Nov-13 22:35:45

Definitely cash!

GoldiChops Thu 21-Nov-13 23:25:07

As a nanny- cash all the way! A couple of years ago my boss gave me £100 voucher for john lewis, lovely generous gift but I just don't shop there! I only just used them. A card from my charges is always appreciated, but the main thing is just a thank you from boss. Means the world to me if I know I'm appreciated, I do a tough job with long hours so just a few words in a card to say thanks for going above and beyond, a note to say they know the job is tough etc.

And please look into the employment thing, you're the one that'll end up fined. No matter how generous you are being, make sure she is in fact registered self employed and is paying relevant taxes etc.

Beastofburden Fri 22-Nov-13 13:00:19

Goldie, no way can she be registered self employed if she has a regular job every morning at school and a four day a week commitment to the OP.

It's the OPs responsibility to deduct tax and NI and pay employers NI.

If that comes expensive, perhaps the child maintenance from the father will need to reflect that.

fromparistoberlin Fri 22-Nov-13 13:02:19

get her ASOS or topshop vouchers

fromparistoberlin Fri 22-Nov-13 13:05:32

But you ought to be paying tax and NI

sorry but if a single Mum and a young girl have a cash in hand agreement, I am not going to fret about tax.

Teaching assistants earn fuck all.

I hate tax avoidance as much at the next person, but this for me does not fall into that category

Load of people do this type of informal arrangement, and it works

GoldiChops Fri 22-Nov-13 13:06:10

I have a nanny friend who registered self employed, after much discussion with HMRC or whoever sets the regulations. She had a couple of regular jobs and lots of temp jobs for loads of families. It was all legal and above board, as the regs are not well worded and there is some room for some interpretation. So it is possible.

MollyMatey Fri 22-Nov-13 13:12:31

The temp jobs can be self-employed, a regular job is very unlikely to meet the criteria. You can be employed and self-employed at the same time.

In the OP's case, having 2 part time jobs doesn't make someone self-employed. If I worked in a shop during the day and had an evening job in a pub, that wouldn't make me self-employed.

Beastofburden Fri 22-Nov-13 13:16:31

From, the thing is, the person who will suffer is the OP. she will be prosecuted if they catch her. instead of having a dodgy arrangement that she has to conceal, she should get the father to contribute enough for his child support that she can afford a legal deal instead.

And we do need the tax to pay for social care, health and schools so no, I don't think it's harmless.

Goldi, yes, but the facts here are not helpful.

MollyMatey Fri 22-Nov-13 13:20:59

Paying someone cash in hand isn't doing the employee a favour - it just means the employer saves some money! The employee is losing entitlement to things like maternity pay, NI contributions if they ever need to claim JSA.

fromparistoberlin Fri 22-Nov-13 13:31:33

i get it beast (we are soo off the topic) but in these cases

OP is skint, if tax comes into the equation she will pay +
Nanny is skint, she has a low paid job, and still lives at home
Doing it this way, means OP is not claiming for child tax credit anyway, which kind of balances itselfout
the money they get gets ploughed back into the economy anyway

I suspect given the hours/what nanny gets paid the tax in this case would be very little

I dunno, sometimes the good outweights the bad


Beastofburden Fri 22-Nov-13 13:37:44

Agree, from. But also agree with Molly that having an NI record really matters.

It does make me a bit cross. Often it is young, lower paid women who are expected to take cash in hand (I know in this case, the OP has explained that it was not her idea, also in this case the nanny is protected as she has another job). Young women do need to build up a NI record for their pensions and their future benefits, and they deserve the chance to enrol in person schemes. Keeping them in the grey economy means that all those years they have worked count for nothing. It's not fair.

Beastofburden Fri 22-Nov-13 13:39:03

Person= pension. Does anyone know how to turn autocomplete off on iPads? <grinds teeth>

Ericaequites Fri 22-Nov-13 14:55:02

Cash is always nice, as well as a card. Candy is far less likely to offend than alcohol.

LimitedEditionLady Fri 22-Nov-13 15:03:37

Voucher for a salon so she could have nails done or hair done or something pampering for her.

LimitedEditionLady Fri 22-Nov-13 15:06:56

She was asking for gift ideas not a grilling about how she pays the nanny.Cant this just be a nice thread about someone wanting to thank the nanny and show her appreciation rather than an argument about tax evasion?

ThenSheSaid Fri 22-Nov-13 15:11:30

Cash and a card, every time grin It is a thoughtful present.

mrsjay Fri 22-Nov-13 15:18:47

maybe vouchers for top shop or somewhere as people have and a nice bracelet from the children you can get funky ones on the high street maybe a leather one or something she would probably love something from the kids too

mrsjay Fri 22-Nov-13 15:20:19

how did we get from a nice gift too paying the nanny confused

NomDeClavier Fri 22-Nov-13 15:28:23

"It does make me a bit cross. Often it is young, lower paid women who are expected to take cash in hand (I know in this case, the OP has explained that it was not her idea, also in this case the nanny is protected as she has another job). Young women do need to build up a NI record for their pensions and their future benefits, and they deserve the chance to enrol in person schemes. Keeping them in the grey economy means that all those years they have worked count for nothing. It's not fair."


Although nanny is not as protected as one might think, especially if she earns diddly squat as a TA or more than £109 with the OP.

Also if the OP is struggling to afford a Christmas present they're likely to struggle even more to afford back paid tax and NI plus a fine equal to that amount.

Talkinpeace Fri 22-Nov-13 16:39:23

Sorry, I was the one who spotted the tax thing : I'm an accountant after all.

The thing is that all 'historic' deals with HMRC about tax status were torn up on 6th April when RTI came in, paving the way for Universal Credit.
And HMRC in their wisdom find it easier to target 'little people' rather than take on big corporations.
They love to get the Daily Heil frothing about 'tax and benefit cheats'.
Through my work I know that HMRC routinely check back 7 years when they spot a problem and if they suspect deliberate wrongdoing, go back 20 years.
Helping people through the turmoil of such visits is never fun.

there are vouchers that can be used at lots of stores : why not get her one of those
once she's told you her UTR.

TheListingAttic Fri 22-Nov-13 16:44:17

Dragging this thread back to original topic: Etsy vouchers? It's all cool, quirky, handmade type stuff. So maybe some vouchers for there and then box of chocolates/bottle of wine (although you mentioned you think family are Jehovah's witnesses - are they not teetotal? May be totally wrong about that, or she might not be strict/practicing but might be worth noting!)

ovenbun Fri 22-Nov-13 16:47:36

how about one of the boots star gifts? this week its the sanctuary one, £19 from £40 if she is the kind of girl who is into spa stuff? I always lust after these when the offers are on smile

shrunkenhead Fri 22-Nov-13 16:57:01

Er, she's a JW.....so doesn't celebrate xmas! Save your money, you don't want to offend.

Charotte31 Fri 22-Nov-13 16:59:33

I was a nanny for years. Cash everytime!!!

sashh Fri 22-Nov-13 19:20:26

Er, she's a JW.....so doesn't celebrate xmas! Save your money, you don't want to offend.

OP said the family were JW, doesn't mean she is. I've known a few in my time and I don't think any of them had entire families that were/are JW. And the OP knew about the nanny's birthday, most JWs keep quiet about their birthdays.

And if she is JW then I think an 'end of year bonus' is fine.

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