to think weddings are a rip off?

(74 Posts)
KissMyStardust Wed 13-Nov-13 22:14:45

£3.50 for chair covers?! £400 for a harpist for a 20 minute ceremony?!

These things were the final straw today, the costs are actually making me feel sick. Its not even value for money. I refuse to buy in to this industry. But in laws (to be) think im being unreasonable as, apparently, we must have this, that and the next thing - what is a going away outfit anyway?! Thing is, it is the in laws that wish to fund all this but I still can't bring myself to spend such massive amounts of money, even if its not mine.

Sparklingbrook Wed 13-Nov-13 22:16:52

YANBU. Can you run away?

EndoplasmicReticulum Wed 13-Nov-13 22:19:19

Elope.

My wedding cost about £400 total. We're just as married as anyone who spent £20,000.

Lilacroses Wed 13-Nov-13 22:21:39

I feel for you....I have exactly the same feelings about the cost of weddings. We did nearly everything ourselves and not only because we didn't have alot of money...I actually think it's nicer and more personal. I agree, it makes you feel sick that you are "buying into" all this crap. It's a right racket.

frogwatcher42 Wed 13-Nov-13 22:22:02

I totally get where you are coming from. I would rather spend the money paying off a mortgage, or on the honeymoon!!!

Could you talk to them and explain that you just don't want it. It is a total rip off and if you are anything like me, the best weddings you have attended have been the slightly alternative, cheaper versions and not the bog standard large house, large meal (usually pretty tasteless and cold!), dismal disco/dance, standing for hours for photos etc etc.

The best one I went to had the reception in a pub! Good luck. You're going to need it (but I am sure whatever you end up doing it will be lovely and one of the best days of your life!).

ReluctantCamper Wed 13-Nov-13 22:24:03

God, I loved my wedding and properly bought into all the racket. However, you should have the wedding that suits you OP. Find a way to escape. Good luck!

Weddings don't have to be like this though, and you don't have to buy into it.

Just be firm with your In Laws, even if they are funding it, try to get them on your side in helping you organise a brilliant party for all yor friends and family without throwing money away.

Would it help if you decided exactly what you 8do* want for your wedding, what feel you want, the general atmosphere, everything, and then talk to your in laws about this and say that some things just don't 'go' with your theme.

For example, I'm having rustic wooden mismatched chairs at my wedding, so chair covers are definitely not needed!

Tell them it is just a party, will only last one day, and there is no need to spend silly money on it.

PrincessKitKat Wed 13-Nov-13 22:27:30

You're not wrong OP. I had many a panic attack as I hate wasting money and couldn't cope with the excess.

I ended up looking at what I felt was essential & with that in mind, setting a budget I was comfortable with and working strictly to it.

Could that work for you?

Onefewernow Wed 13-Nov-13 22:27:49

YADNBU.

I have thought the sane for ages. The sorts if weddings people have now are first world madness.

My cousin had a marquee, a field, hay bales and trestle tables, local flowers and food bought by guests. A home made cake.

It was really lovely.

KissMyStardust Wed 13-Nov-13 22:29:03

thought about eloping but would love all my family
there, especially grandparents and with having a young dd going away is a bit stressful!

fil has turned from a lovely man to some sort of wedding obsessed monster...i need to have quiet alone time after seeing him...i have mental health issues which prob doesn't help matters.

i like the pub idea though...much more us.

ElizabethBathory Wed 13-Nov-13 22:29:05

Elope.

ElizabethBathory Wed 13-Nov-13 22:29:24

Sorry xpost OP!

WooWooOwl Wed 13-Nov-13 22:31:23

Weddings are not a rip off. Weddings are lovely celebrations.

Certain wedding services are a rip off though, absolutely. You don't need even half of what's available and marketed as essential to brides, and I say that as someone that had the whole big shebang of a wedding.

Think about the things you actually want for your wedding, like happy guests and a lovely memory, and work out what will make that happen. Chair covers contribute nothing of real value to a wedding. Drinks, good food and good music contribute massively to happy guests, and that is what you will remember.

Let the inlaws spend their money, just make sure they spend it of stuff that will let you and your future husband have the wedding you want.

frogwatcher42 Wed 13-Nov-13 22:32:41

The pub was genuinely lovely. They had a church wedding, then we all went to the pub, had pub grub (pre ordered - there were a lot of us but pub had a few rooms which were all traditional and lovely) then informal speeches and music in pub with locals coming and going. Pub fires in the evening - all very casual. The pub only charged for the actual menu prices, we all commented on how great the food was compared to most weddings, and the informal dancing and chatting with log fires was excellent. It was a great knees up - bit like a pub party at new year!!!

fannyfireworks Wed 13-Nov-13 22:35:45

I couldnt take money if it meant compromising on what i wanted. Too late to back out and do it all yourselves OP?

80sMum Wed 13-Nov-13 22:36:21

Weddings are a bit of a rip off, I agree. As soon as the word "wedding" is mentioned, the price of everything seems to go up. Why does a fairly ordinary meal that would normally cost less than £20 suddenly cost £50 a head? How come a nice evening dress might cost £300 but if it's a wedding dress it's £1,300?

KissMyStardust Wed 13-Nov-13 22:38:14

WooWooOwl - i totally agree with you, weddings are lovely celebrations, i want to have that.

Im not good at standing up for myself and there is so much pressure from ILs.

Slimchance Wed 13-Nov-13 22:38:44

YANBU. And the worst of it is that you are a hostage to fortune on the day because it is a one-off event and for most people it is the first time you are arranging it all and therefore naieve when it comes to potential problems.

The surroundings for my reception were lovely, but (very expensive, supposedly top notch hotel in Suffolk) decided (without consultation) to restrict us to one room area, when we had been told it would be two, reducing the space we had available by about 40%. (Fortunately it was boiling hot so we could spill out on to lawns, but still.) They also changed the serving/food arrangements.

We were not happy but we were too busy and caught up in the day to complain at the time, then we were away on honeymoon, and then I was moving countries. And I guess I was younger and less savvy than I am now and I suppose overall it wasn't quite bad enough to make me want to spoil the memory of it by making a fuss.

They have you over a barrel basically!

diddl Wed 13-Nov-13 22:38:48

Well they might wish to fund it, but you don't have to let them!

You can arrange it yourselves & just invite them!

Slimchance Wed 13-Nov-13 22:40:03

Your cousin's wedding sounds lovely * Onefewernow *

Onesleeptillwembley Wed 13-Nov-13 22:40:04

It's perfectly possible to have a wedding without chair covers.

lighthousesea Wed 13-Nov-13 22:42:16

80% of the weddings I have been to were boring and unoriginal (and expensive). Agree with the other posters that the best weddings are the cheaper but more thoughtful weddings.

It's one day! And yes it's lovely, but it's definitely not worth the money. I would much prefer a slightly bigger house or a few amazing holidays.

DownstairsMixUp Wed 13-Nov-13 22:42:52

YANBU. As soon as you mention "wedding" you see dollar signs in the eyes. Mine is on a strict budget, registry office, piss up in a legion pub and a bbq.

lighthousesea Wed 13-Nov-13 22:42:58

Ps. Really do not bother with the chair covers!

KissMyStardust Wed 13-Nov-13 22:43:47

thankfully not too late to back out and have a total rethink though, fannyfireworks .

I always just wanted this to be about us getting married with the people we love...not a big showy do.

Iaintdunnuffink Wed 13-Nov-13 23:02:25

No one remembers the chair covers at a wedding they went to. People are far more likely to remember a free bar.

The nicest weddings I've been to have been in places like a church hall with a hog roast, booking out a restaurant, or going to a pub.

LastOrdersAtTheBra Wed 13-Nov-13 23:04:34

Add wedding to the word dress, cake, car, meal, venue, photographer, etc and you can add a 0 on the end of the normal price.

No matter whose money it was, I could not spend £thousands on one day, there are so many things you could spend your money on, which would make a difference to the rest of your life, not just one day.

My parents gave me a large chunk of money as my first home deposit, my friend's parents paid a similar amount for her wedding, around the same time. I'm now mortgage free, she is divorced and still screwed by negative equity, as it took her all the house price boom years to save the deposit to finally buy somewhere. I see big weddings as a really quick way to ruin the rest of your life, but maybe that's just me!

Louise1956 Wed 13-Nov-13 23:05:12

You don't have to spend a lot of money. just have a quiet wedding. Why do you need a harpist?

KissMyStardust Wed 13-Nov-13 23:10:22

just to clarify, the chair covers and harpist were not my ideas but ILs lastest must haves.

melbie Wed 13-Nov-13 23:14:51

Whatever you do someone will moan so just do whatever you want! A week after all they will remember is that it was a lovely day

ems1910 Wed 13-Nov-13 23:17:55

If it were me, I would tell them that while I appreciate their very very kind gesture, I cannot accept their money as I do not want a big wedding.

My ILs paid for their daughter's wedding reception and took it upon themselves to invite a lot of people SIL didn't know. They already know that OH won't let them do the same, he will return their money.

It's your day, don't let this overshadow it x

IAlwaysThought Wed 13-Nov-13 23:20:53

I think weddings are a bit like children's names - it's best not to discuss your plans before they are finalised. It gets more tricky when PILs are helping to pay.

PrincessKitKat Wed 13-Nov-13 23:46:45

Kiss - why not suggest that the money you're saving by having a low-key affair could be put towards a vow renewal, filled with MILs 'must haves'?! Doves, albino peacocks, ice sculptures... She can go mad on unnecessary tat

lisianthus Wed 13-Nov-13 23:48:42

Don't have an incredibly expensive wedding you don't want especially if someone else is paying for it as on the day you will be walking around feeling sick at all the expense and won't enjoy it. Then afterwards you'll have to be grateful for years and pretend you enjoyed it or the PILs will get all huffy at your "ingratitude".

NoComet Wed 13-Nov-13 23:53:27

YAVVVNBU
I'm eternally grateful We got married as students and that neither DH, me or our parents had the money to contemplate a hotel wedding reception and all the nonsense that goes with it.

ZenNudist Thu 14-Nov-13 00:10:50

Stardust def lay down the law. It's got to be what you and your dp want. No one will remember chair covers. Harps are bland. Don't let your ILs live vicariously through your wedding, making it what they want.

Know what you mean about not wanting to spend other people's money on overpriced nonsense. Better to spend your own money on the day you like not on ILs big day.

Don't wait for it to spiral into an unstoppable behemoth of a wedding. Politely thank them and say no to everything you don't want. Research & source what you do want. Can you afford to pay for things yourself?

I turned down £10,000 offer from ILs as I didn't think a wedding should cost that much & anyway we were planning on marrying abroad. I also didnt need it and did want things to be on mine & dh's terms.I did eventually spend a decent amount of my own money but mainly on a fab holiday not the actual wedding.

You also need to watch for ILs inviting all their friends & family that you don't want there. I got random add ons at the last minute that MIL 'couldn't say no to'!!!! She said she'd pay for them but I don't think they ever did. It didn't matter, they took the whole wedding party out for loads of meals when we were on holiday!

delasi Thu 14-Nov-13 00:10:56

Pretty much just repetition of the above but... weddings don't have to be expensive. Costs £50 to get married Mon-Thu at our local registry office, £90 on a Friday and somewhere around £150 on a Saturday. No Sundays or public holidays. I know of people who've gone along with the minimum required guests - 2, to serve as witnesses - in just regular clothes and been in and out in 10mins.

Not saying you have to be at the other extreme end of the spectrum, just agree that it doesn't have to be a mega blowout on the budget. What's more, if your ILs are set on something a bit 'swish' a lot of it can be done without spending lots of money. Like others say, it's only when you attach the label 'wedding' to it that it becomes so expensive.

PS here's a tip if they really want a live musician: hire a music student from a reputable college/university locally! They're very talented and very cheap grin

delasi Thu 14-Nov-13 00:14:20

Btw I agree with everyone else though, it's about the atmosphere of the day and if you don't want an OTT experience in the typical sense then you and your DP especially need to be able to communicate that to them. I think it's okay to accommodate some of their ideas or suggestions, DH and I certainly did things we didn't plan on doing originally because of close relatives who were funding it, but it all had to stay within some pretty key criteria of what we wanted from our wedding. Yes, just because someone else pays for it doesn't mean that they own it!

DoJo Thu 14-Nov-13 00:17:36

When they say these things could you just say something like 'thanks, but if we are going to spend an extra £350, I'd rather we got the band to play for an extra hour/put it behind the bar/give our guests a gold bar each' or similar?

Bogeyface Thu 14-Nov-13 00:29:46

Someone else money = someone elses wedding.

Say thanks but no thanks and elope.

CanucksoontobeinLondon Thu 14-Nov-13 03:32:34

It's your damn wedding, and it shouldn't be stressing you out. If it is, thank your in-laws sincerely for their generosity, and elope.

DH and I had a big wedding. We just wanted something simple, but succumbed to pressure from my parents and my in-laws. It was a logistical nightmare, and don't even get me started on the cost of everything. My mom especially was determined we should have the wedding of her dreams, mostly because when she and my dad got married they had very little money and were forced to have a tiny wedding by circumstance. As she orchestrated my wedding, I often found myself wishing she'd had a big wedding of her own back in the day and gotten it out of her system when she was the bride.

DH's sister also had a big wedding, but they were filing for divorce barely two years later. She revealed much later that she'd had second thoughts about marrying the guy starting a few weeks before the wedding, but she suppressed them because the whole production was already in progress and was "too big to fail".

Bearandcub Thu 14-Nov-13 03:34:52

YANBU

www.youtube.com/watch?v=gimiDBAK2wA
Yes - it is a rip off!!

WaitMonkey Thu 14-Nov-13 07:42:00

YANBU. Good luck finding what you want.

Silvercatowner Thu 14-Nov-13 07:46:22

I had to push very hard to get the wedding I wanted - and even then it was a massive compromise. Luckily I find frilly things such as harpists and chair covers quite vomitous.... had those been arranged I would have made my excuses. It's 28 years ago and I don't have particularly positive memories - do have very positive memories of the last 28 years though!!!!

purplewithred Thu 14-Nov-13 07:52:46

Going through this at the moment too. £1500 for photos when you know only you and your parents will want any of them and really one decent photo will do; etc etc etc. I'd happily elope but dp really wants his family and friends there. Bah humbug.

fluffyraggies Thu 14-Nov-13 07:57:24

Skimmed the thread, sorry if repeating:

OP listen - cancel everything. Seriously. Do it sooner rather than later and stop the madness.

Start afresh and do it your way. Honestly. Don't have the wedding of your Inlaws dreams, have the wedding of YOUR dreams. Other wise you will spend the next X no. of years looking at your wedding pics and thinking they are a reminder of how you didn't stand up for yourself.

It will take one difficult conversation (i hate confrontation too, i know it'll be hard) - but once it's done it's done.

You are obviously very welcome into their family, so they'll have the hump for a bit probably, but the dust will settle quite quickly i recon.

You will feel so liberated afterwards, and free to plan it how you and DP want it.

Thingymajigs Thu 14-Nov-13 08:00:18

They are definitely a rip off. Right from the engagament ring stage "rare diamond must be 3x's your monthly wage" crap it tries to suck you in.
Reception venues aren't even secretive about how they rip you off. Just ask them how much to host a party for 100 as opposed to hosting a wedding reception for 100. They will triple the price.
Last Summer I went to a very pricey wedding which was traditional, far too long and a bit dull. The bride had been saving since she was first engaged 10 years earlier. She spent the entire reception and evening do outside feeling faint, possibly from the stress and feeling overwhelmed.
In contrast we attended a fun ceremony in a bar/restaurant. They had slideshows of the couple growing up and all of their friends. Lots of fun stories and quirky individual ideas all put together very cheaply by their friends. I loved that wedding.
If I get married I'd just sign a piece of paper with 2 witnesses and enjoy a nice honeymoon.

olgaga Thu 14-Nov-13 08:09:26

What does your DP want/think about it? Is it because they've spent the same kind of money on siblings' weddings and want to treat them all equally?

Trills Thu 14-Nov-13 08:26:00

How much do you think it costs to buy a harp, keep it maintained and tuned, travel with it somewhere, turn down other offers that afternoon?

If you don't want a harp £400-worth of wanting, then don't have a harp. But don't complain that "20 minutes of harp" costs a lot of money. It's not just 20 minutes.

struggling100 Thu 14-Nov-13 08:29:13

Because we had similar stresses, my husband cancelled our planned (and more elaborate/expensive wedding). When we got married, we did it very simply, and we didn't tell the in laws until a week beforehand. It significantly cut down on the hassle. I think they were disappointed, but it made it 'our' day again.

OneLittleToddleTerror Thu 14-Nov-13 08:30:42

YANBU. It's your wedding, your day. We did it at the registry with just family, and have a meal afterwards. That would suit what you say about the pub thing. Invite all your family to the registry and then have a big pub reception? DH and I both feel the money is better spent on a deposit of a house.

loopdaloo Thu 14-Nov-13 08:38:50

Weddings can be as cheap or expensive as you like! I got chair covers for 99p each, bought reduced Christmas chocolates for favours, made my own invites, dh did a fabulous buffet to go alongside a hog roast, made the bouquets with artificial flowers bought wholesale. We didn't skimp on anything but I hunted for the best price for everything! We splurged on the venue as it was amazing and on the entertainment but there are always bargains to be found! I was lucky in the fact my parents funded it and the only thing they insisted onwas prosecco for toasts, bought on special offer months before!

HotelTangoFoxtrotUniform Thu 14-Nov-13 08:40:50

YANBU. Ditch the chair covers - surprisingly they don't disguise the fact that the chairs are, in fact, chairs and are just a new way to make money from people. TBH if I were you, and I was you, I'd cancel the whole thing as struggling did and rebook on your terms. The only bit that matters is that you're getting married. The rest is froth.

chalkythecat Thu 14-Nov-13 08:42:23

You do have a choice.

I have a friend who runs a chair cover business and works her finger to the bone. She doesn't earn a lot of money. All those chair covers are transported (petrol £££), carried into the venue (heavy), pimped and preened (dull!), taken down (dull), carried out of the venue (heavy) probably on a Sunday (unsociable), transported back (petrol £££), laundered (£££ and dull), packed away (dull). This is why chair covers cost £3.50.

I'm a florist and flowers are expensive but you don't have to spend £2.5k on flowers. £100 doesn't go very far but I am a magician and it will look 500 times better than a Tesco special. Hopefully you will only get married once so I would advise brides not to be a total scrooge...

fluffyraggies Thu 14-Nov-13 08:44:45

trills are you a harpist by any chance? grin

(i agree with your point by the way)

Kerosene Thu 14-Nov-13 08:51:09

It's up to you how much you buy into it all - the idea of spending a quarter of his salary on a fucking ring makes me nauseous (does anyone actually do this, or is it one of those wedding magazine/DeBeers marketing campaign things?) TBQH, a quarter of your salary on the wedding in total is a bit overmuch. Throw a party that you'll enjoy, not one other people think you should have even if it's grim.
(which is to say, if you're the kind of woman that enjoys the stately home/croquet lawn/string quartet/humongous dress - if that's what you'd choose even if the media were pushing pub function rooms and celebrities were all having registry office weddings - good on you for knowing your own mind and rock on with your bad self)

My friend's tolerance for wedding gouging broke when she was quoted some thousands for use of the chandeliers, and I remember a cousin fully weeping on her wedding day because someone broke a vase and the cost of replacing it was more than her rent. I'm quite glad we had an overseas wedding that I organised (rather than going through a company) - we avoided a lot of the assumptions you get in British hotels, even if it meant my mum's wedding faff was focused rather oddly - there was considerable flailing over Special Wedding Umbrellas They've Got To Be Special It's Your Wedding.
You can get far with 'ooh, I'm sure it's lovely, but it's just Not Very Us, so we'll just keep on with Plan A', repeated often enough - particularly if you can say 'we don't really know what to do about <thing you don't care two hoots about>, what do you think?'

YANBU. I am planning my wedding at the minute. Was shocked by the prices of 'must have' wedding items.

In the end we got offered use of the place where best man works. Not exactly a wedding venue, however I am past that & now think its lovely.

Have had lots of help and ideas planning it. We are on a tiny budget, & have had to rethink that a few times ( budgets gone down a bit due to realism)

I cant wait! We are doing most things DIY.

PS YY to bloody chair covers being a waste of money

sandfrog Thu 14-Nov-13 13:58:06

Agree the harpist will have many more expenses than just sitting down to play. Hours of practice, buying music, travel etc. (No, I'm not a harpist!)

But in general no, weddings don't have to be expensive if you don't want them to be.

harticus Thu 14-Nov-13 14:11:50

YANBU
It isn't compulsory to buy into all of this wedding bullshit.
Incredibly silly money is spent on utter tat.

PestoPeachissimos Thu 14-Nov-13 14:20:06

They don't have to be a rip off.
It doesn't cost much to get married at your local Registry office. We did that, had a meal afterwards with our Best Man & Best Woman, job done!

MostWicked Thu 14-Nov-13 16:05:41

Most weddings make me want to vomit.
By the time all the plans are complete, the marriage has been forgotten.

ocelot41 Thu 14-Nov-13 16:14:36

YADNU. You are in danger of being pushed into having a day you don't want to: perhaps your in laws are trying to 'treat' you or perhaps they are trying to control things. But the bottom line is you aren't comfortable with this, and this is your bloody day!

We got married on a cliff top in Scotland (my family are from the English side of the border - just) specifically because the person is licensed and not the place, which keeps a lot of the wedding racket within limits, as there are no restrictions on the 'venues' you can choose.

EldritchCleavage Thu 14-Nov-13 16:58:15

Lots of people will probably say pick your battles, but the problem with that is the constant small-ish issues that are tempting to let go will add up to a day that is not what you want and makes you feel alienated from your own celebration.

Could you get your DP to speak to them, after you have both sat down an set out the things you do want? Bear in mind this may mean paying for it yourself.

I really would draw the line at chair covers and harpists. My favourite wedding crap discovery when I was planning ours was special knives for cutting the cake at the bargain price of £70. I think wedding 'favours' (since when are they called that?) are a bag of shite as well.

Without wishing to sound snippy (merely curious) why are you telling us all this not them?

I had a big white affair but we worked out what would be important to us and budgeted for it. It's not really different than a birthday. You could have fireworks for that. You just don't usually.

Work out together what you want and tell them together.

KissMyStardust Thu 14-Nov-13 19:36:08

Minnie - i posted here to vent my feelings pre speaking to ils.

i see what people are saying about why chair covers and harpist may cost - fine if you have the money but in day to day life me and dp have a tight budget so to spend so much money on these things makes me feel ill.

I have spoken to ILs. MIL is lovely about it, just wanting us to enjoy the day but FIL has taken huff. Even when I told him i was stressed to the point of feeling ill he said that of course you get stressed planning wedding, no matter how you do it.

KissMyStardust Well done for speaking to ILs.

Ignore FILs huff. However, even though he is probably going the wrong way about it, maybe he just wants to feel involved. Is there something you wouldnt mind him taking control of? Cars perhaps?

Shonajoy Thu 14-Nov-13 20:12:38

Listen to your gut. We did ours then dinner in merchant city for smaller amount of 55. Bar bill included they drank a lot, was £1500. So our wedding cost £2,200 21 years ago.

DanceWithAStranger Thu 14-Nov-13 20:24:33

Kiss, you haven't said anything about your DP's feelings about all this. Does he want the big wedding? If not, why isn't he speaking to ILs, not you? If so, have you talked to him about how you feel and how much it's stressing you out?

GirlWithTheDirtyShirt Thu 14-Nov-13 20:26:01

We got married a couple of weeks ago. It cost a fairly large amount, and we had help from my mum and DH's parents.

We chose to spend money on the things important to us - food, a free bar and a jukebox. And they're the things that everyone enjoyed and commented on.

Nobody mentioned the fact we'd scrimped by having a register office marriage, a one hour only photographer and no bloody chair covers!

Xmasbaby11 Thu 14-Nov-13 20:27:37

I agree - it is sooo expensive!

I do understand why the harpist, etc cost a lot - we were very happy with ours as the atmosphere was beautiful and live music is something special, worth paying for IMO.

It's the overpriced alcohol that got me!

mumaa Thu 14-Nov-13 20:40:47

Its up to the couple involved but I'd be gutted if I spent tens of thousands of pounds on one day, that's one of the reasons we eloped.

you don't have to have anything other than what you want. Each to their own but if you think its a lot for certain items or you wouldn't spend the money if it was your purse then you are entirely right to say its not what you want.

Everyone has a different idea as to what a wedding should be, my friend actually ended up lying to her DM over her wedding, saying she had ordered things just to keep her quiet, when in fact she didn't want them. Cue a rather confused mother of the bride on the day "where are you chair covers?" hmm

byanymeans Thu 14-Nov-13 21:16:22

I married the man of my dreams this summer, in my favour (8yr old) skirt, a primark top and topshop £25 jacket. Holding a my hand made bouquet we had made over pizza the night before in our favourt town. We got married, walked to pub, then sainsburys, got picnic food and enjoyed the day.
We never seem to have money, we would never have able to keep everyone happy. So we chose to just a have a great day, fun relaxed and please ourselves for the one day. It was amazing.
What Im trying to say is if YOU BOTH want chair covers or a harpest then its worth the money, if its not going make a difference to you dont let other people include it in your day.

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