To think I'm not an idiot so I'll dress my child in whatever coat I choose?

(36 Posts)
Dollslikeyouandme Mon 11-Nov-13 15:35:09

Quite annoyed at what I've just read in ds school newsletter.

'Some children are still wearing thin Summer coats or fleeces, children not dressed appropriately with a warm coat may not be allowed to play outside'.

Ds is still in his 'Autumn' coat. Quite thin, with fleece lining inside and a hood. Yes it is thin and hasn't got much warmth, but, he'll be wearing a jumper underneath, and running around getting hot at playtime. I've got him a thick winter coat ready for when in my opinion it's cold enough to wear it. And he has had it on Fireworks night for example when it has been bitter.

He's sent in with hat, gloves and says he is warm enough and doesn't want his thick coat on as he's too hot.

Our choice or the schools?

WorraLiberty Mon 11-Nov-13 15:39:40

Fleeces aren't waterproof

Summer coats (not sure what defines them really) are fine imo, as long as they're waterproof.

Perhaps the letter is just worded badly?

Frostedloop Mon 11-Nov-13 15:39:59

Yours, school is probably blanketing all parents with the message as a couple really do have thin coats on. Nothing like pissing the many off rather than tackling it directly with the few.

WaitingForMe Mon 11-Nov-13 15:42:14

If it was a general thing I'd assume your child is dressed appropriately (I wouldn't put a kid in the coat you described in summer) and this was aimed at parents who aren't dressing their kids appropriately.

I would however, send a note explaining that you read and understood their letter but clarifying that your child will always be dressed appropriately and if they disagree to raise it directly.

BuzzardBird Mon 11-Nov-13 15:43:12

The school are just trying to get the message over to the parents that are not sending their children into school with a suitable coat without starting a mass kick off.

Not working well obviously grin

The temperatures around here recently haven't been too toasty. brrr!

Dollslikeyouandme Mon 11-Nov-13 15:50:41

Well I got the coat specifically for Autumn when it's cold but not bitter/windy. He has a Summer coat that's thinner again, and short.

His coat is thin and not very, very warm, but imo its sensible and yes, waterproof.

I had a warm coat on at the weekend and got very hot just going for a walk.

Atari Mon 11-Nov-13 15:54:30

Neither of mine have taken a coat at all yet blush

I do keep expecting to be spopen to but they say they don't need one and tbh I'm not fighting. They're not tiny though.

Atari Mon 11-Nov-13 15:55:52

I don't think the letter's aimed at you op

curlew Mon 11-Nov-13 15:57:54

It says "may not" not "will not"

That means that if the school thinks it's too cold to go out without a coat at any time the kids won't be allowed to go out with a coat. Not "as from the date of this letter, no coat=no play outside"

Has he been "not allowed to play outside"? If not, I would assume the teachers are sensible like you and have realised that his coat/fleece combo is perfectly fine. I don't know where you are OP but around here there has only been one properly cold day so far this season.

I think there are always going to be a handful of parents who really don't dress their children properly, unfortunately.

YouTheCat Mon 11-Nov-13 15:59:42

We've had parents who send their kids with no coat at all because they bring them in the car and just don't think.

I wouldn't worry about it, OP.

Dollslikeyouandme Mon 11-Nov-13 16:00:32

They'd love you then Atari! Ds is 5, but he'd sure tell me if he was cold. We're outdoors every weekend when it's not tipping it down, long walks, in the park, for hours and he hasn't froze yet. In fact he's always warm and toasty.

redskyatnight Mon 11-Nov-13 16:01:12

There's a whole bunch of children at DC's school that turn up with no coats at all whatever the weather.
A whole other bunch that turn up in just thin fleeces (in the rain).
And a whole other bunch that won't wear their coats for love nor money though they are forced to take it with them, looking at my DS here.

The school is targetting these folks, not those that make a reasonable attempt to provide their DC with something appropriate.

Joysmum Mon 11-Nov-13 16:02:54

It's the schools choice because they are responsible got them whilst they are there.

Having said that is was a newsletter, not a personal one aimed at you. Discus it with his teacher or send him in with a letter if you don't feel it's appropriate to your situation but it wouldn't surprise me if there are many children at your sons school who aren't feeling as warm. The letter will be for their benefit.

In other words, don't take it personally as it wasn't a personal letter.

Joysmum Mon 11-Nov-13 16:03:25

*for them

Dollslikeyouandme Mon 11-Nov-13 16:07:47

No, he hasn't been stopped from playing out, only on rainy days when it's wet play and no one is.

Just don't want them thinking I can't be bothered to get him a proper coat or anything. But November doesn't automatically = freezing, I haven't even had to de ice the car yet. If last year is anything to go by thick coats will be needed right up until April, we had snow and minus temperatures right up until early April.

Atari Mon 11-Nov-13 16:08:47

I think there are very few days when boys children playing outside would be cold in UK. They're far too active. If you go to watch football in deepest winter the players are still in shorts even though it feels bitter as a spectator.

DowntonTrout Mon 11-Nov-13 16:10:15

Pah. DDs school has a uniform coat. No arguing there. Black, John Lewis waterproof with inner, removable fleece. It is to be worn over a blazer.

DD does not wear this coat. Neither does anyone else. They all carry it to school and either stick it in their lockers for the week or just carry it backwards and forwards. She ^may> wear it in snow but very, very rarely otherwise.

Floggingmolly Mon 11-Nov-13 16:11:44

It was in the Newsletter; it wasn't aimed at you.

dollywashers Mon 11-Nov-13 16:12:17

The letter is prob not aimed at you but parents who send their little children in with no coat/v lightweight summer jackets. I am a nursery teacher and it happens a lot. Sometimes it's easier to send a general letter rather than speaking to individual parents. Sometimes I don't think parents of foundation stage children in particular don't realize quite how long their children spend outside.

I think you are taking this too personally - it won't be your DS's coat that they are worrying about.

SkullyAndBones Mon 11-Nov-13 16:15:54

a fleece lined waterproof coat is perfectly appropriate this time of year. The letter is obviously aimed at the numpties still sending their kids in with either no coat or totally weather inappropriate ones.

i wouldnt worry about your ds at all!

Dollslikeyouandme Mon 11-Nov-13 16:16:33

Yes probably not MrsCakes, took it a bit personally as it mentioned thin coats/fleeces, and ds is fleece lined.

I shall just carry on as I think best.

WorraLiberty Mon 11-Nov-13 16:17:42

If your child is wearing a thin coat with fleece lining inside and a hood, and a hat and gloves...the letter obviously isn't aimed at you.

Just ignore it.

ZingWantsGin Mon 11-Nov-13 16:33:40


you know nothing.
nothing about kids. at all.
definitely nothing about your own kids. the notion! ha!

you don't understand about the weather either. It's cold when The School says so.
how dare you think you could choose what's best for your kids?! ever?!
you have to wait for The School to tell you what's best for them.

It's appalling really that you have dared to make any life choices at all without consulting The School first.
tsk tsk.
you should have waited for them to provide you with the relevant information about your job options, if & when to get married, when & how many children you should have etc.

but you didn't.
so you have failed as a parent, as a citizen and as a human being. fact.
shame on you.

ZingWantsGin Mon 11-Nov-13 16:35:19

btw, I was kidding.

of course it's your choice, and I don't think it was aimed at you.
but I would have gotten annoyed about that too.

same with the suncream & hat warning in the summer.

ExcuseTypos Mon 11-Nov-13 16:42:19

Gosh I work in an infant school and most of the dc are still not putting coats on at break time. They run around so much that they get very hot. The children are allowed to decide whether are not to put a coat onshock. Imagine that!!

I will say, if it is very cold, they do have to put their coat on.

Dollslikeyouandme Mon 11-Nov-13 16:48:03

Did make me smile zing. Usually I find the school take the common sense approach about most things. I do get slightly annoyed about these messages in newsletters, regarding sunhats/sun cream/lunchbox contents. Always seems a bit patronising.

NicknameIncomplete Mon 11-Nov-13 17:03:02

My dds school dont even seem to care that much. You walk passed the playground somedays in the middle
Of winter and there are kids without coats or jumpers on.

Sunnymeg Mon 11-Nov-13 17:09:53

I had a wry smile when I read this thread. A couple of years ago DH went to Canada on business. While he was there he bought all three of us winter coats made of some thin material but designed to withstand temperatures down to minus 30.

The coat is warm, toasty warm, so warm that I hardly ever wear mine, it gets too hot. Obviously I had no hesitation in sending DS to school in his knowing it was warm and waterproof. Imagine my surprise when I was asked in by his teacher who wanted to have a word because she thought the coat was too thin to be warm enough for English weather! Luckily DS's coat had a label stating it was suitable for minus 30, that shut the teacher up! grin

ZingWantsGin Mon 11-Nov-13 17:20:14


shock really? whatever next? are they also allowed to choose when they need to go to the toilet?

<clutches pearls at the thought of hippy schools>

ExcuseTypos Mon 11-Nov-13 17:37:51

Well that would be taking things a bit far Zing wink

CrohnicallyTired Mon 11-Nov-13 17:41:28

The school are just covering their backs, so if some poor kid is freezing cold because they don't have suitable clothing, and the school decide not to send them out to play, the parents can't say they weren't warned. Unfortunately, there are parents who will eg send their child in plimsolls in the snow.

ZingWantsGin Mon 11-Nov-13 17:42:53

imagine Sheldon Cooper as headteacher.

you'd never hear the end of it.

"class mate agreement" grin

Sheldon Cooper wouldn't care about anyone else's coat - so long as he had his own correct coat and was able to maintain his own optimum body temperature, everyone else could go hang.

colleysmill Mon 11-Nov-13 18:06:16

Reminds me of the time I was pulled aside at pre-school regarding ds and his coat.

I was approached at pick up informing me (quite firm my) that ds's coat was not suitable for the ( then weather) and asking me to purchase him a warmer coat. I very gently pointed out that actually yes he had a warmer coat that was hanging behind her on a peg that I had also sent in that day but for reasons only known to 3 year olds he insisted on wearing the thinner coat on his head as a superhero cape.

Apparently at outside play ds had said the warm coat wasn't his and wore the thinner one instead and no-one had checked to see whose name was inside the extra unclaimed coat.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now