to wonder what crosses DP's mind somedays when he dresses DD

(105 Posts)
Thurlow Wed 06-Nov-13 19:53:07

I don't care if the colours don't match. I don't care if she has a blue polo shirt under a yellow cardigan. I don't care that her ponytail is two inches nearer one side of the head than the other. I don't care if she is wearing flowery, lacy leggings with a cowboy t-shirt.

But bless her, being dressed in pink cords that are clearly too small and which DP picked up from the charity pile, and which have left her with little indents around her tummy, and a thick bright green wool jumper when she has a temperature... hmm

Poor mite. Shall I start laying her clothes out - or maybe I should start laying his clothes out for him instead <rubs hands evilly>

lola88 Wed 06-Nov-13 19:54:57

DP once sent DS to the childminder with his slippers on and she had to take him around all day with them blush

RoseRedder Wed 06-Nov-13 19:55:06

Hope this has a twist like she is 16 or so grin

cupcake78 Wed 06-Nov-13 19:56:18

My dh is rubbish at dressing the children and himself . Ds always ends up in t-shirts and ankle bashers on cold days. Dd is frankly a mystery how he covers her up.

He's a 'drab and throw on in the dark' kind of man.

cupcake78 Wed 06-Nov-13 19:56:54

Err that's grab not drab grinwink

temporarilyjerry Wed 06-Nov-13 19:58:30

DP was a SAHD when DSs were small. I would often come home from work to find them wearing each others clothes. There are 4 years between them so for instance, DS1 aged 6 would be wearing the clothes of DS2, aged 2 and vice versa.

Thurlow Wed 06-Nov-13 19:58:30

grin Lola.

It would be better if she was 16. Somehow I think a 16 year old might actually rock that look quite well.

The irony is we had a conversation this morning before I left for work about how DD was running a temperature and how the advice is to keep them cool in layers.

So she had layers on. Just one of them was wool.

<sigh>

Mim78 Wed 06-Nov-13 19:59:07

I had to stop keeping too small things that I was waiting to give away/give to charity in dd's bedroom because dh always managed to find them and put them on her, despite array of other clothes available...

DHs have a homing instinct for too small/unsuitable clothes I think.

Have now labelled all the draws in dd's room and made sure there is nothing in the room that doesn't fit her.

Thurlow Wed 06-Nov-13 19:59:09

Ha! I want to see a 6yo in a 2yo's t-shirt!

magicstars Wed 06-Nov-13 20:00:33

I've come home to find dd in some pretty unusual outfits when DH has dressed her. My favourite was baggy, pink pyjama bottoms, a green vest, a navy blue bolero cardi and multi-coloured Stripey slipper socks. The other day it was just tights and a T-shirt (he'd taken her to play group like that)... smile

eagerbeagle Wed 06-Nov-13 20:01:32

My DH is hopeless. Once put DS in trousers that had been handed down to DD (2.5 years younger).

He's still living down when he rocked up to pick me up from my aunts with DS in just a t-shirt and nappy. Well babies don't need trousers dontyaknow and it wasn't in a heat wave there were hmm all round.

He also routinely forgets to put DCs shoes on.

No sense at all.

Barbeasty Wed 06-Nov-13 20:57:59

DH sent DD to nursery in a top and tights. He thought they were leggings with feet, and had wondered why DD hadn't seemed very impressed.

It's worse now she dresses herself.

Chopsypie Wed 06-Nov-13 21:03:05

This is why I put clothes together in outfits in the drawer.

So he knows to get a trousers/t shirt combo out of the top drawer if it's warm, or the second drawer if it's cold.

He is utterly useless.

Tinklewinkle Wed 06-Nov-13 21:07:27

DH used to do this. I swear he used to rummage around until he found stuff I kept for painting/ready to go to the charity shop, whilst completely ignoring the neatly hung up clothes in their wardrobes.

When he did dress them in their actual clothes it would be wildly clashing and mismatched

DorisShutt Wed 06-Nov-13 21:07:50

DH brought DS to visit me in hospital. DS was wearing too small trousers, a too large vest, and a pyjama jacket.

My dad may have been involved in the outfit choosing too grin

cocolepew Wed 06-Nov-13 21:10:00

"Leggings with feet" grin

OneUp Wed 06-Nov-13 21:13:55

My DP never has the chance to dress DD strangely because I lay out all her outfits for the week in her room with matching socks and shoes.

Mim78 Wed 06-Nov-13 21:15:28

My dd stills wants to wear "leggings with feet" on weekends - even though she is 5.

mrsjay Wed 06-Nov-13 21:16:44

I was in hospital ill while pregnant he brought dd1 into visit with the teeny tiniest jacket i had ever seen the poor kid had her arms up in the air, I said where did you find that, Oh it was at my mums, his mum had bought it for her friends d 2nd birthday dd1 was 4 shock

elliejjtiny Wed 06-Nov-13 21:17:02

DH does this. He brought DS1, DS2 and DS3 to visit me in hospital. DS1 and DS2 (aged 7 and 5) were wearing each others school uniforms. DS3 had DS2's t-shirt and a pair of dungarees that he'd outgrown. None of them were wearing their own socks, DS1 was wearing my pink ones. I grin now but at the time I was flapping about what the nurses must have thought.

mrsjay Wed 06-Nov-13 21:17:52

I also coped with mis matched colours she was clean and tidy but the wee jacket was the last straw

Thurlow Wed 06-Nov-13 21:18:40

I love the fact that it's the sizing that is throwing them!

I can't imagine how many times today DP struggled getting those too small skinny cords down and up to change a nappy...

Clashing I can cope with. Clashing is 'fun'. It's the bloody sizing!

mrsjay Wed 06-Nov-13 21:19:47

do they not even realise how tiny it is didnt they struggle to get them on them hmm

Chesterado Wed 06-Nov-13 21:20:56

Yy to total inability to determine pyjamas from day clothes. My mum also struggles with this though too ("I thought they were a nice matching set") covered in sleeping owls/elephants/whatever

Tinklewinkle Wed 06-Nov-13 21:21:15

Yes, sizing is a definite problem for my DH.

He gets in a terrible mess when sorting laundry - there's me, DD1 who is 11 and DD2 who is 8.

You'd think it would be easy to tell our clothes apart, but no. Every time he sorts out clean washing I end up with a load of my 8 year old's knickers, DD1 ends up with my jeans, etc, etc.

How hard can it really be?

Pilgit Wed 06-Nov-13 21:22:10

Oh God my DH does this - then when I point out that the clothes are way too small or unsuitable for the weather he says something like 'well what are they doing in her drawer then?' (to the too small) to which I rather tetchily point out that it is OBVIOUS when clothes are too small and that I AM NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN PUT THINGS IN THE CHARITY BAG! But for some reason it is MY job! DD1 just rolled with it (and started picking her own clothes very early anyway- which did throw up some amazing combinations but that's another story) but DD2 will absolutely not wear something too tight and will scream and screech for ages.

CookieB Wed 06-Nov-13 21:22:22

This has made me laugh. I used to work very long hours at weekends & watching dp attempt to work out how baubles work for a simple ponytail in dds hair was priceless grin. Took about 2 weeks to figure it out under my supervision as I was sick of coming home & looking at her rats tails hair.

Mim78 Wed 06-Nov-13 21:22:42

I bet, bet, bet that midwives and nurses are really used to this. They must see nothing but older siblings being brought in by dads in their old clothes, each other's clothes, hair all a mess etc.

Sorry this is really sexist but so funny.

mrsjay Wed 06-Nov-13 21:22:50

when mil was alive she did have trouble with Pjs she thought they were jogging suits EVERYTIME dd1 slept over I always picked her up with her clean pjs on ,--and wondered what she slept it--

Thurlow Wed 06-Nov-13 21:22:54

I can forgive the pyjamas and really, it doesn't matter too much if it is a PJ t-shirt not a normal t-shirt. Though obviously everyone else seeing your DC will know that a sleepy bunny means it's PJ's grin

Twinkle, he is at least sorting laundry!

mrsjay Wed 06-Nov-13 21:24:32

tbf my dh was like a ninja getting the hair up in a bauble it was very tight though the dds always looked like they had a an instant face lift grin

Mim78 Wed 06-Nov-13 21:24:45

Pilgit - I have had the "what is it doing in the draw" line too. Gave in in the end and have made sure there is nothing too small anywhere near dd's bedroom any more... But I totally agree there is no reason why you should be responsible for putting things in charity bag.

Thurlow Wed 06-Nov-13 21:25:17

Cookie, yes, the ponytail has been a long and slow battle. I kept trying to teach him - fair enough, he's a man with a number 4 all over, of course he doesn't know how to put a ponytail in - and he wasn't listening until recently, when DD's hair got so bad even he had to admit she couldn't have it down all day.

And yes, I know it's awfully sexist blush... but it seems true? Maybe it's more dad's dressing girls though?

mouldyironingboard Wed 06-Nov-13 21:25:50

It's worse when the fashion victim is an adult. Many years ago, I had an unexpected hospital admission and needed my DH to bring clothes for me to go home in. I had to leave the hospital in a bright yellow t-shirt, red cardigan, grey leggings and odd shoes (odd as in they weren't a pair!) smile

CookieB Wed 06-Nov-13 21:26:06

Oh and the dc now pick their own clothes as it looked like they dressed in the dark when he was 'putting together' an outfit for them. Funnily enough he is very particular about his own clothesblush.

Mim78 Wed 06-Nov-13 21:27:17

mrsjay my MIL has bought dd a set of pyjamas as an outfit before when she was staying with them. Sweet of her, but obviously pyjamas. MIL would be quite capable of finding the only too small item in the vicinity too - she is really lovely but not overly worried about clothes etc.

Also - think what you are referring to is known as a ""Croydon face lift"

Imsosorryalan Wed 06-Nov-13 21:27:29

The thing is, I've had to stop commenting on all the inappropriate clothes wearing as he then has a go at me for not letting him get on with it! I hate seeing them in uncomfortable clothes!

nickelbabe Wed 06-Nov-13 21:28:04

dh struggles to put clothes on, yes, so he probably wouldn't notice the wrong size. all of dd's clothes In the correct size are on one shelf.

he's rather good at choosing outfits.

SayCoolNowSayWhip Wed 06-Nov-13 21:29:48

Just to go against the grain here, but DH dresses DD beautifully better than me

So it's not all men.

mrsjay Wed 06-Nov-13 21:30:15

think what you are referring to is known as a ""Croydon face lift"

OH i didnt want to be Croydenist grin

MIl also bought dds pj day outfits

BerstieSpotts Wed 06-Nov-13 21:30:22

DP is fine normally but did manage to pick out too-small stuff from the charity pile. We have just moved and actually charitied it all so hurrah grin And to be fair at that time, he didn't live with me so it was my responsibility.

However he can't tell apart a "jumper" from a "coat" (this goes for himself as well, he will wear one or the other, never both confused) and I used to get told off at nursery when I picked DS up because he was supposed to have both. DS has a huge aversion to any kind of warm covering or extra layers and so will happily go out in -1 in just a t-shirt and cotton jumper. Probably shorts as well. Now, OK, DP I agree that there is no suitable word to describe a zip-up hoodie made from cotton but "jumper" is acceptable as a shortcut for "anything one layer above a t-shirt", who calls it a coat?

Thurlow Wed 06-Nov-13 21:30:33

I had thought DP was getting better. A few times recently I've been pleasantly surprised by a fully matching outfit including the best match shoes. Today was a definite backwards step...

knickernicker Wed 06-Nov-13 21:31:30

They all know how to dress themselves though.

CookieB Wed 06-Nov-13 21:32:59

Haha I will always have the image of hairbands pinging around the room while he's trying to figure this complex manoeuvre out. He is ok now though thankfully. 2 bouts of nits later vastly improved his detail to hair maintenance.

Mim78 Wed 06-Nov-13 21:36:01

Mrsjay thanks for not being Croydonist - I live in Croydon!

BerstieSpotts Wed 06-Nov-13 21:37:20

I must say that DP's own dress sense is appalling and he "doesn't believe in trying things on" confused so I can write any of this off as him just not caring that much about clothes. And to be fair he is fine - dresses DS better than he dresses himself except that all of his clothes now match. Jeans jeans jeans jeans jeans jeans black jeans. 70 million black t-shirts, 3 grey t-shirts, one brown t-shirt. All freebies or under £10 for the jeans. One of his friends tried to take him shopping recently and he was totally baffled as to how or why anybody would spend lots of money on clothes just because they look nicer grin

pianodoodle Wed 06-Nov-13 21:38:01

DH actually spends a lot of time and thought putting together outfits for DD. He's very good at it! I throw any old pattern together because she's 2 and looks cute anyway!

But...yes, the sizing and appropriateness for the temperature are often way off.

Tonight he bathed her and accidentally got bath water on her gro-bag for bed. I said to see if her old gro-bag would do for the night otherwise we'll just use a blanket.

He brought her out in the old gro-bag saying "yeah this'll do fine" when in fact her legs were bent at the knee and she couldn't have straightened them out if she'd tried grin

Basically if he's managed to shoehorn her into it somehow, that means it "fits"

Strumpetron Wed 06-Nov-13 21:39:00

Haha bless.

My dad used to do my hair with the hoover nozzle.

But a bobble on the nozzle, hoover my hair up, then slide it over.

I thought nothing of this until I told my mum one time and she looked at me like hmm

Pontouf Wed 06-Nov-13 21:42:54

DH does this. I can sort of cope with the fact that he appears to be both colour and pattern blind - polka dots, stripes and tartan all in the same outfit anyone? (I especially like it when the colours are all very similar but not actually matching so it looks a bit like a colour run washing mishap). hmm It's the fact that he puts both DC in totally season inappropriate clothing. DS (3yo) is often in just a short sleeved t-shirt at the moment and DD (7mo) will often be sporting a beautiful thin cotton short legged romper (the sort designed to be worn on it's own in really hot weather) with tights and a thick cardi.

Last night he put DD to bed in a long sleeved vest and dungarees. Apparently it was my fault because I accidentally put the dungarees in the drawer with her sleepsuits. Not his for being an absolute fool.

CookieB Wed 06-Nov-13 21:44:06

Strumpetron grin. That is actually quite clever.

pianodoodle Wed 06-Nov-13 21:44:35

strumpetron your dad sounds brilliant grin

DrinkFeckArseGirls Wed 06-Nov-13 21:45:50

Strumpetron shock I don't believe it!!!

Thurlow Wed 06-Nov-13 21:49:06

Pontouf grin

I'm rather relieved the weather has turned properly. DP spent most of September and October insisting it wasn't cold enough for DD to wear a coat. He couldn't get his head around the fact that he was warm enough in just a sweater because he was pushing the pushchair, whereas she was just sitting there!

SecretLimonadeDrinker Wed 06-Nov-13 22:04:22

Ha ha, I feel so relieved reading this!

DH said to me that he doesn't understand my complicated system for DS clothes, that would be all tees together, all pjs together, all jeans together, etc!

So... how do they dress themselves again?!

Strumpetron Wed 06-Nov-13 22:10:09

piano and drink apparently he isn't the only one! I posted about it on facebook once and a few people posted videos of dads doing it on youtube! Must be a 'dad' thing grin

www.youtube.com/watch?v=AoR-_dQGdvU

enormouse Wed 06-Nov-13 22:10:37

These stories are hilarious. Dp is quite good at dressing ds, primarily because I buy miniatures of DPs clothes for him.

The only time I was a bit miffed was in the very early days when DS was about 3 months old and DP took him to his mum's so I could nap.
When I turned up the poor mite was next to the aga, wearing a vest and a sleepsuit with dungarees OVER IT and a little cardigan OVER THAT.
I was so sleep deprived it took me a while to realise that DSs feet matched his arms for some bizarre reason.

storynanny Wed 06-Nov-13 22:15:53

when one of my boys was a baby he had a lovely pair of velour dungarees with shaped feet and a big red apple applique on the front. When he was dressed one day in this outfit by daddy, the shaped feet were pointing the wrong way and the apple was on the back. Daddy had absolutely no idea it was on back to front .

storynanny Wed 06-Nov-13 22:19:13

... he also let the same baby crawl about in the damp muddy garden "helping" to do some weeding while I popped out quickly to the shop. No big deal, except the baby was dressed in a vintage family heirloom romper suit sort of outfit made of silk. All dressed up ready to have a photo taken with the elderly original owner of the garment.

midgeymum2 Wed 06-Nov-13 22:23:39

My dh cannot get his head around the difference between leggings and tights either! He frequently dresses dds in just tights on bottom half - yy to "aren't they leggings with feet?" I think he likes them cos he doesn't have to find socks. Dds look like mini wrestling tag team hmm

milkysmum Wed 06-Nov-13 22:29:19

Laughing so much at these! Dh not to bad both my mother and his seem to find it impossible yo tell difference between leggings and t shirts and pyjamas!

Yes to tights being confused as leggings. When DD was tiny DH dressed her in red tights on back to front and a red vest - she looked like an old fashioned Strong Man.

I love how he dresses her now. He seems to put on loads of clothes at once. She's always allowed to wear her huge party skirt when daddy dresses her - even though she can barely walk in it.

killpeppa Wed 06-Nov-13 22:33:25

trying to stifle my giggles!

my exMIL is the WoRST!!!!

I would pack matching outfits, put socks and a vest in the middle and fold it up as one little parcel. yet when I collect DS the next morning he would be in THE MOST random combination ever!!

I pulled her on it one day and she said 'she thought it looked nicer that way'

she also put my DS in a coat that was on one of her teddy bears (she collectshmm) as she didn't understand that his pramsuit was outdoor wear and not for bedtime, it had mittens attached to it, was fur lined, had a hood and said 'snowy days...' on it.

Weasleyismyking Wed 06-Nov-13 22:34:35

I'm actually laughing at these! Leggings with feet smile, pjs as matching outfits grin (what DO they put them to bed in?!) and the pony tail/Hoover thing is just inspired!

I found my DS1 in his brothers 0-3 joggers after DH changed him. DS1 was 2.3 at the time!

NoComet Wed 06-Nov-13 22:39:11

DH has to have his clothes put out for him, no way was he let loose dressing DDs.

By three, both probably had a better idea what was in Dad's wardrobe than he did. They certainly were more competent at dressing themselves!

trixymalixy Wed 06-Nov-13 22:46:58

Yes, DH has sent DD to nursery wearing pyjamas and clothes several sizes too small that were in the charity pile. Worst was when I picked her up from nursery wearing a tunic but no leggings, tights or socks. It was the middle of winter and she was on antibiotics for a chest infection hmm.

I have a photo of ds1 when mil dressed him.

He's wearing light blue trousers and a hand knitted blue jumper. 'That's ok' I hear you think. But the trousers had a stretchy waist and she had tucked the jumper into the trousers.

He looked like a sack of potatoes shock

I was in hospital for a few days when ds1 was about 14 months. Xh brought in ds1 to visit. He was wearing a red sleep suit which had dried weetabix down the front, and a pair of wellies.

I wonder if that's why ds1 is now so particular (fussy) about what he wearsgrin

grin My DS is only 10 months and DP loves him in a baby gro so he manages okay for now. I definitely have this to come as he is completely colour/pattern blind.

My sister was taken in to hospital for an appendectomy last month. Her DP collected her some clothes to go home in - a pair of holey black leggings out of a rubbish bag, red converse and an orange thermal walking top made of spandex! She had to ring my mum to see if she'd left any clothes at her house that she could bring her grin

ICameOnTheJitney Wed 06-Nov-13 23:44:04

My mate continually dresses her DC in clothes that JUST fit. They're 3 and 1 and never look comfy. It's not that she can't afford new...she just seems to have a blind spot about fit....they're both big kids for their age...tall and solid...and she buys the clothing for their actual age instead of their SIZE. I've mentioned "That top's a bit of a tight fit...looks quite restrictive" but she just looks at me like I'm nuts!

I'm dying to show her the RIGHT way!

bolderdash Thu 07-Nov-13 00:05:23

My dd has a section in the wardrobe of what I'd call unwearable clothes. These are presents from great aunts, gp etc. They are mostly made of nylon (pretend chiffon) and involve bat wings and the like. I thought it was obvious. These are things she doesn't wear that we keep to be polite. But no, occasionally he'll team one up with a pair of too small leopard leggings. He normally takes her to a class that is very early on Saturday mornings. I am ashamed to ever go there because of the attire I've seen her coming back in. I don't know what they must think.

MrsMook Thu 07-Nov-13 01:02:49

DH's special moment was early on when DS1 was dressed in a velour baby blue dungaree with feet, teamed up with a sunflower yellow stripey vest. My eyes hurt.

It's pretty hard to clash his wardrobe these days as everything was bought in one batch and is easy to mix and match. DH managed to put DS1 in DS2s socks though. To be fair, they are only one size apart (0-2 and 3-5)

I love it when DH attempts to put my hiking trousers on by accident. It always takes him so long to process why it's so difficult to wrestle on XS trousers instead of L.

Xochiquetzal Thu 07-Nov-13 01:13:59

I did my Mum's washing over half term as her washing machine broke and she had my youngest siblings' stuff to wash so I've had 5 children's worth of school uniform, PE/rugby/football/ballet kits and Brownies/cubs/scouts uniforms between 9 years up to 15 year old sister size which DH has been trying to dress our very small 5 year old DD in... They even have name labels in so he should have realised they weren't DDs!

Brittapie Thu 07-Nov-13 01:22:17

I once got unexpectedly admitted to hospital and asked XH to bring in some bits - pyjamas etc.

He brought TWO PYJAMA TOPS.

His excuse? "I didn't think you would mind if they didn't match"

Sigh. He isn't actually all that daft. He just didn't know how clothes operated, or something...

Kimye Thu 07-Nov-13 03:28:49

My DH regularly dresses our DC like they are going to clown school!!

And for all the same reasons others have listed too, too small, too large, wrong child's clothes, wrong weather....

I find it quite mystifying as he works for a luxury brand clothing company, he wears their clothes and always look great. So he can co ordinate outfits and buy great clothes. He also buys a majority of the kids clothes too.

I just don't understand how he gets it so wrong so often! Especially when he will dress one child in winter clothes and the other 3 in summer clothes!

I think there is definitely a market for stickers which say "My Daddy Dressed Me" which we could stick on the kids!!

Livvylongpants Thu 07-Nov-13 03:49:37

I'm on maternity leave but DP used to do this! He was a SAHD. He once took her out for lunch in a fleecy sleepsuit, feet and all. In August! And just put some sanders over the top.

He said that's what she wanted to wear hmm and she's often come with no, trousers/top/shoes on 'because she didn't want to wear then'

After having DD we were going to stay with my SIL for a few days to rest, I asked him to pop home and get the baby bits and me some clothes. He came back with 5 pairs of pyjamas! I only noticed this when he were 70 miles away from home and couldn't leave the house for 5 days

I love the story of my dad going to the hospital to pick up my mum and newborn (firstborn) brother - he stopped at the shop and bought some little shoes, because how is the baby supposed to go outside without any shoes on!

Itsallabout Thu 07-Nov-13 04:09:35

My Dd spent a long hot Australian summer wearing jeans and jumpers because it didn't occur to Dh to look in another drawer for her summer clothes ( despite me tellling him repeatedly).

Pull Thu 07-Nov-13 04:24:00

I think I may have an answer for some of them (going by what my dh does anyway)
I think what it is, they get an outfit right once and it gets the nod of approval so they just keep on dressing them in said outfit, despite the obvious that it's TOO BLOODY SMALL!!!!!!
<<and breathe>>

Lavenderhoney Thu 07-Nov-13 05:19:18

Dd always look like Bjork on acid when dh dresses her. I don't know how he does it, as everything matches.

Ds won't let him help himsmile

Tortoiseonthehalfshell Thu 07-Nov-13 05:51:43

Wait, am I the only one who is hmm at this?

My DP never has the chance to dress DD strangely because I lay out all her outfits for the week in her room with matching socks and shoes

Seriously? Seriously ?

TheBookofRuth Thu 07-Nov-13 06:17:27

I will own up to extreme control-freakery over what DD wears too - I won't let anyone else pick out her clothes for her, mainly due to the frankly bizarre combinations my DH and DM have put her in.

When my MIL was staying she had been asked to dress DD in the outfit I'd laid out, and I heard over the baby monitor saying "we don't think we should wear that, we don't think we should wear matching stuff, we just think we should wear what we wear." First of all, what's all this "we" business, because at 20 months DD didn't have a strong opinion on clothes (apart from an obsession with "shoooooes!" - she even told her wellies she loved them yesterday); and secondly MIL herself was quite literally head to toe in red at the time. She didn't seem to get the irony when I pointed this out.

I am aware, btw, that DD will soon start to develop opinions on what she will and won't wear and that's fine, I'll accept that from her. Just not from anyone else. grin

hooochycoo Thu 07-Nov-13 06:59:08

YES! My DH does this too.

I've thought about making " my daddy dressed me" stickers too

One time I picked her up from playgroup after work to find her in a pink and orange flowery sun dress with a stripey purple long sleeve vest underneath and red and white stripey tights and black patent shoes.

Another time I was away and he took her to a birthday party in a grey velvet and poufy net skirted party dress. Which is good. But put one of DS's old long sleeved stripy green vests underneath and a pair of tracksuit bottoms! Which wasn't so.

He's got it sorted for himself tho. He only buys exactly the same jeans and trainers. That way he only has to worry about choosing a t shirt, and they all go with jeans apparently. He is scared of jumpers though. Never wore them until I bought them for him!

ILetHimKeep20Quid Thu 07-Nov-13 09:24:19

My six year old son went to school in his dads socks twice when I was in hospital having ds2. Between them they could not locate a pair of his socks, of which there are many. A pair of my black socks would have done better than the size 10 sports socks..

Thurlow Thu 07-Nov-13 10:03:43

There are some days I'd quite like to put her in a "Daddy Dressed Me" sticker. Particularly when we do a handover as I'm coming home from work and he's heading out, and I'm stuck in public with a not only badly dressed child, but one who is also covered in baked beans and has her hair glued solid a la Something About Mary... (DP's logic - what's the point in cleaning her up when she's going to have a bath in an hour or so?)

mrsjay Thu 07-Nov-13 10:08:40

Mrsjay thanks for not being Croydonist - I live in Croydon!

your welcome grin

Dahlen Thu 07-Nov-13 10:13:39

Do you all buy your DH's clothes? Or do they look as mismatched as the children they are dressing?

I'm just amazed at how many people this is normal for. I suppose it must be explained by women being the focus of much more aggressive marketing about clothes and appearance so that they have a greater understanding of fashion, co-ordination and sizing. Because it sure as hell isn't the fact that women are born with a "know how to get child dressed appropriately" gene.

Or it could be that some men just don't consider it important. Is that laziness on their part or simply reflective of the fact that maybe some people set too much store by what our children look like?

No excuse for badly fitting clothes though. It's fairly obvious even to the most un-fashion-conscious that trousers which pinch a child round the waist and ride half-way up the legs are too small.

pianodoodle Thu 07-Nov-13 10:23:26

I once got unexpectedly admitted to hospital and asked XH to bring in some bits - pyjamas etc.

He brought TWO PYJAMA TOPS.

Lol reminds me of all those animal characters on cbeebies that just wear t-shirts.

I can understand either no clothes or fully clothed but why do they just have t-shirts on with bare bums? grin

DorisHerod Thu 07-Nov-13 10:23:54

<nods wearily>

YY to all of these DH dressing children quirks. My DH was terrible at this and also terrible at dressing himself. Intelligent man. Clothes often inside out. Genuinely cannot seem to see that a seam looks different on differnt sides and that the overlocked one on a tshirt goes on the inside. Also totally confused by labels as sometimes 'they are on the outside'. No DH that's a detail on the front where the maker puts their logo.

And to the poster who said her DH used the term coat for any layer over a tshirt..Yes! And thinking that coats and jumpers are either/or garments. Has seriously suggested a jumper to DS3 as a suitable outer later when it's raining.

Facebaffle Thu 07-Nov-13 10:31:09

Slightly off topic...I sent a picture of dd to a friend of her wearing the new outfit she had bought her for her birthday. We were out having a meal. My friend replied that she looked very nice but she was wearing pajamas blush I though they were a top and leggings.

AngelicaFirestar Thu 07-Nov-13 10:58:14

DH dressed DD yesterday in bright red trousers and what he said was a matching top. It was a kind of off slub purple with a flower on the front. It definitely did not match and she looked like she'd got dressed in the dark. I picked her up from nursery and she was wearing a stripy t-shirt that definitely matched. There are mornings though that I end up misjudging the situation and putting her in something god awful. I just tell nursery that she dressed herself grin.

Xochiquetzal Thu 07-Nov-13 17:22:38

Dahlen DH buys his own clothes but as he only owns lots of identical pairs of black jeans, band t-shirts and leather jackets it all matches... I've never yet seen him wear a matching pair of socks though!

MummyPig24 Thu 07-Nov-13 17:47:13

Ds fortunately hasn't let anyone pick his clothes since he was 3.

Dd just wants to wear a dress all the time. So dh goes with it and she ends up in very odd combinations, striped multi coloured tights with a flowered dress and a spotty cardigan.

Although the other day dh came home and I did say to him as he spotted dd "please be aware, I did not dress her today." She now dresses herself.

Topseyt Thu 07-Nov-13 18:07:22

My husband never got the hang of dressing our three daughters when they were young.

When I was in hospital having my youngest daughter (long story, but it was clear she would have to be slightly premature at 35 weeks), he was at home looking after the older two, who were then aged 7 and 3. On the day it became clear that my baby would have to be delivered he had to take them to his mum's to stay overnight. He sent them to get themselves dressed rather than take responsibility for it himself.

Down they both came 10 minutes later, dressed as a witch and a fairy. He didn't bat an eyelid and took them to his mum's like that. No proper overnight bag, just one loaded with toys, no spare undies, no toothbrushes, hair not brushed. His mum sorted some of it out at her house, and he has never lived it down. They came to see me in hospital the next day and meet their new baby sister in the same clothes (a witch and a fairy). grin The sight of it was so funny, not to mention bad for my stitches, as I had needed a caesarean.

CailinDana Thu 07-Nov-13 18:39:12

My DM dressed 2.5 yr old ds in a pair of his sister's 3-6 mth pink trousers, thinking they were shorts. Funny thing was, when I tried to change him he wouldn't let me!
DH doesn't get what the difference is between a dress and a skirt. How does a man get to 31 with a PhD without knowing that! He finds dds clothes entirely baffling.

Mim78 Thu 07-Nov-13 20:13:25

I have never met a man who could get his head round the difference between a dress and a skirt. Obviously men who are in fashion must (in fact my Dad worked for a clothes shop so he must get it) but no men I've met as boyfriends etc.

They just can't get it the right way round - even to the point of consistently saying them the wrong way round.

thesixteenthtry Thu 07-Nov-13 20:51:11

DH knew that the DDs needed new winter pyjamas so picked up some on his way home. Batman marked Age 5-6 years and pink frills, short sleeves and shortie bottoms, Age 11. Our DDs are twins and were 7.

Sophie18 Thu 07-Nov-13 21:12:22

My DP is so useless I have to lay out clothes for him!!! There have been times when I've been away and he's worn tshirts or pants inside out all day and never noticed. I don't think he would ever be trusted to dress children, he can barely look after himself.

Vix1980 Thu 07-Nov-13 22:10:09

My mil told me once years ago when she was in hospital she had left fil in charge of the 3 kids, 2 boys and the youngest who was a girl.

They were brought in to visit her and as her dd was walking towards her, she suddenly realised why the clothes she was wearing looked so familiar - they were off her favourite doll! Fil had actually taken clothes off a doll to dress his daughter in as he had no clue at all about what to put on her!!

My dp must have inherited the same gene though as i came hom to find 16 month old ds squriming around on the floor, when i changed him he had on a babygro aged 6-9 months that id left in a pile for charity shop!

birdynumnums Thu 07-Nov-13 22:45:46

Sitting here nodding at so many of these replies. Once when I was work, my Dp was given the task of just getting my then 3 year old DS ready to go to Winter Wonderland with his grandparents. I nearly died when he got home and saw he was wearing one of his outfits age 9-12 months.He was small for his age to be fair but the trousers were all up his legs, the sleeves up his wrists - I was mortified and so was his poor nan.

wamabama Fri 08-Nov-13 07:19:34

My Mum does this when she looks after DC. I leave her spare clothes and PJs laid out in a pile for each DC and explain to her who they are for plus I put them in age order. She never uses them. I always walk in and she's either picked DC3 babygrow that was drying on the radiator and put it on DC2 (never mind its a size too small and cutting off her blood supply) or she's gone into their bedrooms to pick the most mismatched clothes you've ever seen. And she's put nappies on backwards before now.

Why why why?! How my DB and I survived I'll never know. It wasn't even that long since we were kids either. Thankfully my DH has more sense.

This thread is hilarious.grin at leggings with feet and the hoover ponytail. Can't stop laughing.

SueDoku Fri 08-Nov-13 09:44:57

Oh thesixteenthtry I have just burst I into loud laughter at your twins' PJs..... I'm on the bus, so it got me some strange looks grin

DeWe Fri 08-Nov-13 10:47:48

Dh once dressed dd1 (a large 4yo) and dd2 (just turned 1yo). I had laid out the clothes carefully for them. He put them in the wrong clothes. So Dd2 was trying to run around with about 8" of tights off the end of her toes and dd1 was complaining her tights were falling down. How he managed it I don't know. grin

When df took me and dsis to the hospital to visit dm and (newborn) db, dm nearly cried when she saw us. He had found the rag bag where dm put clothes to be taken away by the coal man for rags, and dressed us in clothes from there. These were all too small, stained, and full of holes. She said she'd seen smarter orphan Annie outfits. hmm

GhostsInSnow Fri 08-Nov-13 11:25:55

DH took me to Paris once and arranged for the inlaws to look after DD and DS who were then 6 and 10 respectively. MIL worked so FIL, who had by then retired was charged with getting them to school for the few days we were away.

When we got back DD, who couldn't keep a secret to save her life, had a great time telling us all about how Grandad had let her go to school in her pyjamas. Transpires she'd had a brilliant idea that to save time she'd jut put her school uniform on over her PJ's so trousers, shirt and jumper were put on top and off she went. Only when she got home and stripped off the uniform in the lounge did FIL realise what she'd done.

Thurlow Fri 08-Nov-13 11:54:18

I asked DP last night why he'd put DD in the two small trousers. He looked flummoxed. "They looked fine," he defended. I asked him if he thought the three inches of bare ankles was part of the look. He shuffled off muttering about how it wasn't his fault... grin

sixtheenth, that is brilliant.

I might have to teach DP the hoover/hairband trick...

enormouse Fri 08-Nov-13 17:07:53

Oh God, I take back what I said about DP being good at dressing DS.

Like your DP, thurlow, he put DS into a pair of tiny trousers (6-9months) and a tiny top (9-12months). Ds now wears 2-3 clothes has a wardrobe full of clothes that are the right size and he zeroes in one the one top and one pair of jeans I was about to pack away for our as yet unborn 2nd DS.

His mum rang to tell me that DS appeared to be wearing a crop top and pedal pushers.
DPs response? Those were the only things in the wardrobe and the top was ok. And they matched.

armani Fri 08-Nov-13 22:40:42

my dp usually sorts the washing out in our house. I always find dd1s clothes in dd2s wardrobe. dd1 is in age 11-12 and dd2 age 2-3 shock grin

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