To be worried about DP's night time antics?

(47 Posts)
fanjofarrow Wed 30-Oct-13 09:20:54

Last night while fast asleep he sat bolt upright, shrieked ''ZIG A ZIG AH!'' apropos of nothing, cackled like a demented hen, then promptly fell back down again and resumed snoring.

In the past he has done exactly the same while yelling ''HEEE HE!'', Michael Jackson style.

While in the depths of slumber, he's also quoted Alanis Morrisette.

He is not a fan of any of the artists listed above.

AIBU to force him to sleep on the sofa forevermore?

fluffyraggies Wed 30-Oct-13 09:28:24


At least his rantings are 'artistic'.

My DH often shouts out in his sleep things like:

''I'm going to fucking kill yer!'' and

''Listen sunshine - you're gonna be sucking up dinner through a straw tonight!''


He's a lovely bloke. Gentle and caring.

MrsRajeshKoothrappali Wed 30-Oct-13 09:33:29

You married a Spice Girl.


fanjofarrow Wed 30-Oct-13 09:39:50

I don't mind him telling me what he wants, what he really really wants. That's fine. However, I think Zig-a-zig-ah-ing at 4am in his sleep is, ahem, too much. sad

YouTheCat Wed 30-Oct-13 09:40:29

Scary spice! grin

fanjofarrow Wed 30-Oct-13 09:41:25

fluffy Are you sure he's not leading a double life and is really Danny Dyer in disguise? shock

Freddiefrog Wed 30-Oct-13 09:44:09

My DH woke me at 3am once and insisted I pinch him.

He was all "pinch me! no, pinch me now! I need you to pinch me!!!!"

So I did. grin

BerstieSpotts Wed 30-Oct-13 09:49:47

grin You need one of those apps which records sleep talking! Then you can blackmail him forevermore grin

livinginwonderland Wed 30-Oct-13 09:50:10

Are you sure he's not a wannabe X-Factor contestant?!

fanjofarrow Wed 30-Oct-13 10:12:23

living With his voice, that would put an end to the X-Factor for good!

maras2 Wed 30-Oct-13 12:01:26

Mine does a throat clearing cough thing to the rhythm of 'That's the way < ah hu ah hu > I like it '.I could sell tickets but do find it a bit creepy as he has his eyes wide open though fast asleep.

fanjofarrow Fri 01-Nov-13 13:07:12

I have been spared any musical ramblings in the middle of the night for the last few days. Although, early this morning, DP rolled over and announced ''Time to boil the cat!'' before snoring again. confused

This is not a euphemism as far as I am aware, thankfully.

ShirakawaKaede Tue 05-Nov-13 23:53:53

All I can say is LOL!

Plomino Wed 06-Nov-13 00:03:14

Mine is away for the night due to work . Apparently he is room sharing with a ZZ top lookalike . I bet he's just going to love DH's night time burbling's , along the line's of 'I TOLD you I'm not wearing orange '.

As long as he doesn't try to turn the thunderstorm down by twiddling the knobs on the wardrobe door (again) he'll be fine .

everythinghippie29 Wed 06-Nov-13 00:15:52

About two nights ago my DP rolled over cuddled me spoon style for a moment before rather firmly spanking my ass 3 times. It didn't hurt at all but I was just dozing off and am struggling to sleep at 8 months pregnany and so was initially angry

I turned around to tell him off for being a bizarre perve and that was when I realised he was fast asleep, at my movement he stirred and mumbled 'stay out of the bloody fridge, cat!' I couldn't do anything but laugh.

Our cat is forever breaking into the fridge and stealing food if we forget to block it, I should add though that DP never smacks either the cat or me whilst concious and he felt very bad when I told him in the morning!

KnitFastDieWarm Wed 06-Nov-13 01:04:08

DH chats away merrily in his sleep, usually nonsense mixed with the odd bit of confidential work info. I'm pretty sure his sleep talking breaches the data protection act at times ;-p

salsmum Wed 06-Nov-13 03:58:23

My DP does this 'sleep shouting' regularly...the best one to date was when he shouted at the top of his voice 'get off my flowerbeds you c***s...I had to chuckle because A) he is NOT a keen gardener and B) we don't have flowerbeds per say just low maintenance shrubs confused x

fanjofarrow Wed 06-Nov-13 17:54:22

I think I escaped lightly with a DP who just shouts nonsense in his sleep. My mother informed me today that when she and my dad were married, he used to regularly sleepwalk and PEE IN HER UNDERWEAR DRAWER.

Thanks, Mum, for that fond memory! shock

AChristmassyJerseySpud Wed 06-Nov-13 18:05:31

My DH has woken me up in the night and informed me that he 'doesnt want to wear the pink dress' and then gone back to sleep

Mind. Boggles.

harticus Wed 06-Nov-13 19:29:43

My ex was always yelling rubbish in his sleep.
The best one ever was:
"Who do you think I am? Joanna fucking Lumley?"

YoureBeingASillyBilly Wed 06-Nov-13 19:37:45

grin At all these especially the cat in the fridge one!

I am single but previous partners have told me that i 'rock' and 'hush' them to sleep quite often like a baby.

One time i apparently reached over and grabbed exps leg and started yelling for him to help me as ds2 was falling and i couldnt get him up. Ds wasnt even in the room- we were on a weekend break away and dcs were at my mum's grin

lola88 Wed 06-Nov-13 19:53:34

DP dreams of zombies and that his fighting them punches and kicks and shouts your going down bitch...

fanjofarrow Wed 06-Nov-13 20:02:04

@spud I entirely understand your husband's issue. I don't like pink dresses either - they make me look like a skinnier version of Jigglypuff. sad

mrspremise Wed 06-Nov-13 21:06:17

My DH just does a crazy high-pitched and terrifying Iaugh-thing in his sleep. . .

DH acts out his dreams all the time. Which is fine if he's dreaming about being affectionate or kind or lying very still and leaving me the feck alone. Sadly, as a police officer, keen martial artist and zombie phobic, he's either detaining somebody, beating them up or hacking a zombie to bits. Sadly, I am on the receiving end of this crap. He's broken my nose, blackened both of my eyes and severely bruised my cheekbone. He's always screaming and shouting about zombies and pushing me off the bed out of the way of another attack of the undead. It is EXHAUSTING.

CocktailQueen Wed 06-Nov-13 21:21:22

OMG, Stumps, really??? Don't you want to sleep in another room? has he sought help? (or are you kidding??)

LongTailedTit Wed 06-Nov-13 21:23:26

Bloody hell Showy! shock

DH is a 'gripper' - rarely says anything intelligible when asleep, but often clenches his hands on whatever part of me they resting on. He used to fall asleep spooning with his hands up by my shoulders/neck but ever since I woke to his hand closed on my throat I make sure he keeps his hands to himself!

He always leaves for work v early and I sometimes mumble half asleep at him. Apparently the best one was "Mmmm, Wellington boots..."

My dh teaches in his sleep. hmm

I've been told to sit down and be quiet, that I'm not going to get a good grade unless I concentrate a and randomly:

'Why have you put your calculator on Ahmed"

gintastic Wed 06-Nov-13 21:27:26

I woke DH up one night by grabbing him thinking he was DD2 falling out of the bed, I was genuinely terrified when he finally woke me up. Sadly most of his ramblings are in Welsh, so I don't get the pleasure of laughing at him (I don't speak it), just the annoyance of being woken up.

dopeysheep Wed 06-Nov-13 21:32:05

Wow Stumps, your DH sounds a bit intense!
I would definitely be looking at alternative sleeping arrangements - I would be too scared to fall asleep lest I became zombified. Erk.

ShirakawaKaede Wed 06-Nov-13 21:37:57

Me "I think you're dreaming...."
DH:"No, they are!"

...I lol'ed and went back to sleep.

Mim78 Wed 06-Nov-13 21:39:06

I had a ex once who used to reveal his inner horrific social climber in his sleep - going on about "the important people" and "the famous people". Was v funny.

waceystills Wed 06-Nov-13 21:46:28

How did I miss this thread? It's hilarious!

More please I'm crying with laughter....

AnotherHelenB Wed 06-Nov-13 21:53:53

Apparenlty I sat bolt upright one night and announced that "Michael Atherton is the best opener in country cricket - he should be playing for England". I don't follow cricket and DH had to explain to me what I'd meant.
confused (Though I did at least know who Michael Atherton was since he was the captain at that point.)

I am telling the absolute truth. Thankfully, in waking hours dh is an extremely sensitive, kind and gentle soul. He is mortified by his nocturnal behaviour and after 15 years we've learnt to manage it. The injuries all happened when we first moved in together. He has spent a lot of time finding out what triggers his episodes at night (it's an actual disorder but annoyingly the meds which stop the nocturnal behaviour mean he can't function well during the day). He has cut out certain foods and I know that if he's worried or anxious he will behave like this so he has learnt relaxation methods he uses before bed. He also tosses and turns before the acting out starts, in a very specific way. It always disturbs me and I wake him up which breaks the cycle. It's often funny as he dreams as much random crap as the rest of us. He occasionally sighs and mumbles stuff about "well here I am trussed up in my fripperies and nobody will even hold my hand" (true story). Or a few weeks ago when he rolled over and whispered very fiercely "you've let loose a rabid monkey and there will be hell to pay!"

TeamSouthfields Wed 06-Nov-13 21:58:36

Both myself and partner talk in our sleep... Dp often spks about work staff and says staff members names... I'm normally shouting garbage or swearingshock

celestialsquirrels Wed 06-Nov-13 22:03:02

"Why have you put your calculator on Ahmed?"

CRYING with laughter!!!

fanjofarrow Wed 06-Nov-13 22:04:17

Haha Helen! grin

I love cricket, and have had a secret crush on the now England captain Alastair Cook for years. According to my fiance, during The Ashes earlier this year, I snuggled up to him and called him ''My Beloved Cooky'' while fast asleep.

My fiance is Australian and fiercely supportive of his team.

You can imagine how that went down. For the rest of the summer he referred to Cooky as ''that cross-eyed Pommie bastard.'' It was war in our house!

I'm hoping he'll have forgotten when the proper tests start again soon. Still not sure whether it really happened, or if this was just Aussie propaganda from my fella! (Although knowing me, I may have been guilty as charged.) blush

Apparently I laugh in my sleep.

Mim78 Wed 06-Nov-13 22:07:25

My dd laughs in her sleep

Minshu Wed 06-Nov-13 22:09:45

An ex once fell asleep across me while we were on a sofa. When I tried to move him he told me that we could go yet, as the lights were on red grin

Minshu Wed 06-Nov-13 22:11:07

And DD used to cry in her sleep while teething. It was horrible hearing her cry and not be able to comfort her for fear of waking her hmm

YoureBeingASillyBilly Wed 06-Nov-13 23:55:34

gintastic my ds1 mumbles in irish when he's sleeping. my irish isn't great and the fact he's mumbling makes it hard to decipher but I can catch the odd word.

mycatisawesome Thu 07-Nov-13 08:03:50

Stumps, my DH is also a Police Officer - he has also fights in his sleep lol

My DH talks about boring everyday stuff that we need to sort out. He always asks me to do/remind him to do 'the thing, you know the thing that we must sort'. I just agree to do it, he goes back to sleep and I giggle to myself. I made the mistake once of giggling instead of answering him, cue a 5 minute rant of 'it's not funny Inga it's really important' grin

CadleCrap Thu 07-Nov-13 08:53:34

[grin@*well here I am trussed up in my fripperies and nobody will even hold my hand* but WTF is a frippery?

fanjofarrow Thu 07-Nov-13 16:49:20

frippery [ˈfrɪpərɪ]
n pl -peries

1. ornate or showy clothing or adornment
2. showiness; ostentation
3. unimportant considerations; trifles; trivia
[from Old French freperie, from frepe frill, rag, old garment, from Medieval Latin faluppa a straw, splinter, of obscure origin]

Collins English Dictionary – Complete and Unabridged © HarperCollins Publishers 1991, 1994, 1998, 2000, 2003
frip•per•y (ˈfrɪp ə ri)


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