To have been so rude to this shop assistant?

(57 Posts)
ICameOnTheJitney Mon 07-Oct-13 16:41:57

I probably was and want to vent anyway. Perfectly prepared to be told either way.

I was in The Entertainer toy shop today...I had a couple of items to put away for Christmas in my bear in mind that I'd been greeted and asked if I needed help three times by different assistants...and I'd smiled at each and said "No thanks, I'm fine." and carried on browsing. Then I saw a display of Nerf guns and remembered that both my DDs had liked playing with our neighbour's son's Nerf guns so stopped to ponder the wisdom of buying them one each.

I was irritably looking at the "Girl's" version (in pink naturally) and thinking about how shit it is that the "girl's" version was more expensive.....when another assistant arrived at my side and interrupted my thoughts to ask "Do you need any help at all?"

I said "No thanks I'm fine" and just glanced his direction as I was a bit sick of being asked by this point.

He then launcehd into a sales pitch anyway! "Oh well these are the latest...the girl's ones are just in...and they're..." so I interrupted him and said "Really I';m fine I don't want any help"


So I said "No. I'm fine...I don't want to know...I want to be left alone" and he rolled his fucking eyes at me.

AIBU to think "No thank you I don't want any help." means just that???

AmberLeaf Mon 07-Oct-13 16:44:29

He is probably told he has to do that though.

I agree it can be annoying though.

Is that the toy shop owned by christians, that won't stock harry potter type stuff because its evil?

claraschu Mon 07-Oct-13 16:45:36

YABU to contemplate buying a gender-specfic nerf gun.

YWNBU to be annoyed at the annoying sales person.

Famzilla Mon 07-Oct-13 16:45:40

Complain. The staff are being told to act like this and the companies really need to know that they're pissing their customers off.

ICameOnTheJitney Mon 07-Oct-13 16:47:33

\claraschu I wasn't going to buy it! God no....mine are getting the normal version!

claraschu Mon 07-Oct-13 16:47:46

Guns are for BOYS; pink is for GIRLS. Haven't you heard? You had better be careful or your girls might end up bisexual, or having gender dysmorphia.

ICameOnTheJitney Mon 07-Oct-13 16:48:30

Amber no that's that other shop...smaller and more "novelty" based....I'm sure they ARE told to do it but I'm also sure the management wouldn't have liked his style.

StarfishTrooper Mon 07-Oct-13 16:48:41

YABU for being rude. YANBU for being annoyed.

ICameOnTheJitney Mon 07-Oct-13 16:49:18

Clara funnily enough it wasn't even a gun...the "girl's" version is a crossbow. hmm so they can be "An Avenging Angel" apparently.

pollyblue Mon 07-Oct-13 16:49:30

Doesn't sound rude to me, you just reiterated what you'd already said. So long as you didn't scream it at the top of your lungs grin

YouTheCat Mon 07-Oct-13 16:49:32

Vote with your feet and shop somewhere else.

ICameOnTheJitney Mon 07-Oct-13 16:49:48

Starfish how should I have dealt with it do you think? Genuine question?

claraschu Mon 07-Oct-13 16:49:50

I'm just kidding and being silly- didn't mean it seriously, (and wasn't really accusing you of being sexist). I agree that this kind of sales pitch is really annoying. I usually run from the shop

TEErickOrTEEreat Mon 07-Oct-13 16:50:07

GAME used to do that to the point that my husband and I used to keep score when we went in.

Interestingly, since their financial troubles, they've stopped. So much nicer to shop there now.

HeySoulSister Mon 07-Oct-13 16:50:20

I feel sorry for the staff. Yes, they will be told to approach customers.... Probably scared you were the 'mystery shopper'

ramonaquimby Mon 07-Oct-13 16:50:36

Amberleaf is right, it is owned by devout Christians. Their shops don't open on Sundays either.

TEErickOrTEEreat Mon 07-Oct-13 16:50:52

Sorry, YWNBU. I would have also added 'you are the X person to ask me that. So annoying.'

KatoPotato Mon 07-Oct-13 16:51:19

The Entertainer dont open on Sundays, even in the middle of a huge shopping centre when my DS has behaved all day round grown up shops.


AmberLeaf Mon 07-Oct-13 16:55:25

Had to google it, it is the entertainer that are christian and banned HP.

TEErickOrTEEreat Mon 07-Oct-13 16:55:37

Not very entertaining then, eh? smile

HeySoulSister Mon 07-Oct-13 16:56:44

Yet they stock guns? How odd

AmberLeaf Mon 07-Oct-13 16:56:56

KatoPotato grin that's familiar! My son was incredulous that that shop was closed when all the rest were open.

He has boycotted it since!

AmberLeaf Mon 07-Oct-13 16:57:50

Oh but guns aren't operated by dark forces so that is obviously fine hmm

KatoPotato Mon 07-Oct-13 16:58:20

After an 'encounter with Rolf Harris and Tom Cruise' in 1991, Gary Grant decided that he would only sell toys that he felt comfortable with from a Christian perspective for children to play with. Items that are seen to promote witchcraft and satanism are not sold.

Please, please please let someone here know what this encounter was?

That's so the kids can pretend to be God and smite people. (spells no, smiting YES...)

MadeOfStarDust Mon 07-Oct-13 16:58:38

I think it is nice that they stand up for their own principles and don't open on Sunday.... (I am an atheist so don't give a monkeys)

ZZZenagain Mon 07-Oct-13 17:03:22

I didn't find you rude.He was rude to override you like that and also to roll his eyes at a customer. Bet that would go down brilliantly with the boss.

I hate hard sell, in fact it drives me out of shops when shop assistants are too aggressive. If you tell one assistant you don't need help, it is annoying to be asked again by someone else. I suppose they are made to do it but I think it is counter productive. If you want help, you look around and at that point, they can jump if so inclined.

MadeOfStarDust Mon 07-Oct-13 17:04:50

I don't work for them - really - really - really - a friend does - but they also pay above minimum wage and actually pay more for night work, and have a whole life approach - students will be employed for a max 20hours a week in term time for instance.... I quite like them

ICameOnTheJitney Mon 07-Oct-13 17:06:55

Hmm. I don't know about the Rolf Harris and Tom Cruise thing but I DO know that the shop is horribly gendered anyway. One glowing pink side and one bright blue side....

JamieandtheMagicTorch Mon 07-Oct-13 17:07:22

I'm not sure you were rude. It sounded more like assertiveness to me.

KatoPotato Mon 07-Oct-13 17:09:35

It's like the parting of the red sea, pink on the left... blue on the right

NicknameIncomplete Mon 07-Oct-13 17:09:54

I hate rude people.

But you were not rude. You had told him a few times that you didnt need his help & he wasnt listening. Some people need a stern talking to and thats what he got.

KatoPotato Mon 07-Oct-13 17:10:48

Wonder if it involved a Rolferoo...

diege Mon 07-Oct-13 17:13:55

Assertive yes, rude no. I had a confrontation on Saturday at the till at the Entertainer when they tried to push those gendered Kinder eggs on me. She insisted they were gender neutral and not targeted at either girl or boys hmm..

nicename Mon 07-Oct-13 17:16:24

I'm sure I've seen Harry Potter tat in there.

SueDoku Mon 07-Oct-13 18:34:38

I think that I would just have smiled, handed him all the things that you had picked up and said something along the lines of, "If you really don't want to listen to your customers, I'll make my purchases somewhere else" before walking out. Hit them in the pocket and they take notice...angry

Sukebind Mon 07-Oct-13 18:35:20

So The Entertainer doesn't open on a Sunday. It doesn't have to. It seems unfair to criticise it for a decision made in line with the owners' beliefs. If they aren't open or don't sell the products you want then take your business elsewhere.
Pushy assistants are annoying but I bet they are not enjoying being pushy either.

itsonlyme85 Mon 07-Oct-13 18:45:40

I wondered why i couldn't find monster high dolls on there website last night

chateauferret Mon 07-Oct-13 18:55:07

YANBU. This is why I don't go to PC World. They always wittered on at me about how good such-and-such a box is at running Widoze. I couldn't give a stuff. I won't have Windoze in the house, except on DW's PC, and it causes enough bother there.

Wibblypiglikesbananas Mon 07-Oct-13 19:42:44

This drives me mad too! I'm in the US and you can't walk into a shop without a welcoming committee and 15 different people coming to see 'How you're doing today'. It is annoying, intimidating and just serves to drive me out of the shop.

There was a Michael McIntyre (sp) scetch once about the difference between the Apple stores in the US and the UK - brilliant, and exactly this kind of thing.

nennypops Mon 07-Oct-13 19:46:49

I don't know why shops think this is a good idea. I'm in the ranks of those who absolutely hate sales pitches and will leave a shop if they try to subject me to one. OK, it may be that it works with some people, but really assistants need to be taught to pick up the messages. If a customer says "No" to an offer of help there really is a very good chance that she means it, and the shop will stand a better chance of making a sale if they leave the customer alone.

Nanny0gg Mon 07-Oct-13 19:51:56

So, no Harry Potter but they sell toy guns...

How very Christian.

picnicbasketcase Mon 07-Oct-13 20:01:07

Ah but they need the guns to shoot all the demons when the apocalypse comes. They'll have no need for wands, y'see.

HicDraconis Mon 07-Oct-13 20:06:57

Hate it hate it. You weren't being rude at all, just reiterating what you'd already said ten times already .

I have a "graded assertiveness" approach to this - it starts off at " No thanks I'm just looking", moves through "thankyou but I will ask for assistance if I need it", past "I've already explained to your colleagues, no thank you" and finally "that's it. I'm shopping elsewhere."

If I found a shop where assistants waited to be asked before nagging at you I'd shop there always!

OldRoan Mon 07-Oct-13 20:10:39

I was browsing in Russell and Bromley the other week (I'm in my early twenties) - nobody in the shop asked me if they could help. My parents joined me, and within 1 minute three different employees wanted to help us.

At least you weren't written off as a skinflint trouble-maker, OP.

ZillionChocolate Mon 07-Oct-13 20:11:15

He was rude, not you.

itsn0tmeitsyou Mon 07-Oct-13 20:21:06

Sounds like a typical Christian to me. Won't stop going on about what he wants to talk about even though you've given a clear message you don't want to talk to him. [Grin]

[ducks hands over head ]

kali110 Mon 07-Oct-13 20:22:42

Think yabu they are made to do this. Theyp prob don't like having to do it either!

needaholidaynow Mon 07-Oct-13 20:27:29

The management probably tell him to do it. He probably knew you didn't want any help, and he genuinely didn't want to help, but his manager was eyeballing him across the room!

ICameOnTheJitney Mon 07-Oct-13 20:50:33

Surely his manager wouldn't tell him to persist in offering help once it's refused?

"I've asked that lady if she needs help..she says no...."

"Only wimps and losers believe shoppers who refuse help son! Get back over there and CONVINCE her she needs help!"

"But she was very rude to me..."

"Then be rude back son! Just MAKE her receive help!"


ICameOnTheJitney Mon 07-Oct-13 20:51:44

oldRoan Hmm....I WAS dressed very respectably for once. I will go in my oldest jeans at the same time and see what happens...I think you might have a point!

needaholidaynow Mon 07-Oct-13 21:19:05

Jitney Clearly you've never worked in asda! grin

Shakey1500 Mon 07-Oct-13 21:23:46

YANBU. I don't think anything you said was rude.

I'd have been tempted to say "Actually yes, you can carry these things I was going to buy and pop them back on the shelves"

grin I'd have thought it though.

KarinMurphy Mon 07-Oct-13 21:52:56

It always used to make me laugh that our local Entertainer refused to sell Harry Potter stuff but had a huge Lord of the Rings section. Why is Gandalf and acceptable Wizard but poor Harry not?

LimitedEditionLady Tue 08-Oct-13 09:53:45

Yanbu i wouldve got annoyed,fair enough they have to ask if you want any assistance but sometimes it verges on stalking.I end up not wanting to buy anything if they pressurise as i feel like its not help anymore.There are different types of shoppers,some people want the staff to choose for them and some be left the hell alone!

LimitedEditionLady Tue 08-Oct-13 09:58:25

Ive found that how people dress doesnt reflect what people spend,a millionaire client of mine comes to me in scruffs lol

TheBigJessie Tue 08-Oct-13 09:59:08

I don't work for them - really - really - really - a friend does - but they also pay above minimum wage and actually pay more for night work, and have a whole life approach - students will be employed for a max 20hours a week in term time for instance

Not at the lowest echelons of packing they don't. They will only offer work to people who can commit to "100% flexible working". Works well with childcare, eh?

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