My colleague apparently has never done a poo or even farted while at work.

(131 Posts)
Babybunny88 Wed 28-Aug-13 23:53:54

AIBU to think she's either lying or has had a really sore tummy for the past 8 years? confused

joanofarchitrave Wed 28-Aug-13 23:55:40

I hear all sorts of things about other people's bowel habits, including that they never go in certain places or that they never actually sit on a toilet seat.

Makes me feel like a complete slob but when it's time to go (well,actually a bit before that) it's gonna happen, there's not a lot of choice in the matter.

LeaveTheBastid Wed 28-Aug-13 23:57:19

I'd believe it, I've trumped but the only time I've ever actually needed a poo at work was when I had a dodgy tummy. And I was literally shitting myself incase someome came in and caught whiff of me grin

FannyMcNally Thu 29-Aug-13 00:01:20

Euurgh! People pooing at work! Will no one think of the others? <wrings hands>

The pooers at work never clean the bowl after them. They should be hunted down and shot. I'm sure they only do it to save buying toilet paper at home.

silkboots Thu 29-Aug-13 00:02:38

I bet she/he has done a sbd (silent but deadly)

M0naLisa Thu 29-Aug-13 00:03:28

I e trumped at work albeit quiet wink but the only time I have had a poo at work is when I've been ill or IBS had a flare up confused

joanofarchitrave Thu 29-Aug-13 00:04:44

Seriously????

I just have no idea how - and why - anyone holds it in for that long.

LadyStark Thu 29-Aug-13 00:04:51

I don't poo at work. I do work near fortnum and mason and often pop in for a poo at the lovely F&M bathrooms.

joanofarchitrave Thu 29-Aug-13 00:10:05

How much warning of an impending poo do you get, then?

DuckToWater Thu 29-Aug-13 00:11:23

I poo two or three times a day so one of them would usually be at work. If you've got to go, you've got to go, it's very bad for you to hold it in!

Also if I get stressed at work it goes straight to my stomach, I can hardly help that.

BrokenSunglasses Thu 29-Aug-13 00:11:41

I don't see anything unbelievable about that. For years I never did a poo outside my own home unless I was on holiday for more than two nights. I still don't really.

I can't poo anywhere other than at home. Even on holiday, I have major problems and usually return from a week away looking 9 months pregnant. It's not for want of trying, my body just will not go anywhere else! I have trouble if there's even anyone in the house!

Chottie Thu 29-Aug-13 00:12:55

Does it really matter either way? Do you really sit there discussing this at work? I would not be interested enough to even think the question

Wuldric Thu 29-Aug-13 00:13:06

I never do a poo in the office. Never. Had the trots badly once and took myself off to the disabled loos. Could not would not ever willingly do a poo in the office.

Boaby Thu 29-Aug-13 00:14:50

I try not to poo at work but if I really have to go I use the toilets across the hall (in a business centre) I have been known to let rip big stinky farts at my desk though & be all 'ooh what's that smell? Must be the harbour' haha

utreas Thu 29-Aug-13 00:15:33

Your colleague is a liar

sarascompact Thu 29-Aug-13 00:15:39

You asked? shock grin

Home and when stopping in a hotel with ensuite, any where else is a no no for me.

2kidsintow Thu 29-Aug-13 00:18:09

I also have a colleague who claims this. I admire her restraint. I would rather avoid it, but sometimes it can't be avoided. smile

Oh, and I have mastered the art of passing wind silently in my classroom and then walking away, leaving the children to blame each other. Most amusing. smile

joanofarchitrave Thu 29-Aug-13 00:26:31

Am truly mystified.

FannyMcNally, the flaw in your argument is that if a pooer at work hmm does clean the bowl, you don't necessarily notice they have shat there apart from the industrial smell. And I don't do it to save toilet paper at home FGS, I do it because if I don't go to the toilet pretty much when I get the urge, I shit myself - I've done it twice in the past two months due to putting it off too long. It's unimaginable to me that anyone can hold on in the way you're talking about - what eventually comes out, pig iron?

EBearhug Thu 29-Aug-13 00:30:48

When I was a child, I would go a whole day without using the school loos (this stopped once I got my periods.) It was probably terribly bad for me, and I don't even know why I did it, I don't remember any particular fear or anything, it's just I was either in lessons, or playing with my friends, so there wasn't time.

And also as a child, we stayed with someone for a couple of nights during the hols, and it was not a very pristine place, and I refused to do a poo till I was back in a nice place (not that I told anyone, I just couldn't do it.) My mother unusually agreed when I said I didn't ever want to stay there again.

As an adult, I've travelled all over, and when you've dug your own long-drop and stuff - I'm just not that uptight about using loos any more, because real loos and running water and so on are a bit of a luxury. Although I do prefer the other cubicles to be empty if I need a poo.

ChubbyKitty Thu 29-Aug-13 00:36:42

Only time I ever pooed at work was when I was ill. I blocked the toilet.

Never. Again. hmm

ScornedWoman Thu 29-Aug-13 00:38:54

I believe it - I once drove the 8 miles home from work to do a poo, then drove back. I'd no more do a poo at work than do one in a public toilet!
My ex- husband could poo anywhere. He regularly used a carrier bag over a bucket in the back of the work van :*)

NuggetofPurestGreen Thu 29-Aug-13 00:43:18

I am fascinated by this. How can you dictate when you will and won't poo?? I couldn't hold it in if I tried!

Babybunny88 Thu 29-Aug-13 00:43:46

Yes, actually, we did discuss this at work once, and I can post a topic about it if I like. And working with babies, poo is often a talked about subject in my work. Don't like the topic then don't post.

I can understand never pooing at work, but surely nobody would hold a fart in?

If you fart at work, please remember to do so near at least two other people. Let it drift out before moving away or it will follow you.

ScornedWoman Thu 29-Aug-13 00:56:12

I wouldn't just f* at my desk; if I really had to, I'd go somewhere deserted, like the stairwell or the prayer room or the toilets.

silkboots Thu 29-Aug-13 01:02:16

To get rid of the smell from a heavy duty turd is to light a match afterwards it works a treat. More tea vicar ?

I always, always avoided doing this if I possibly could.

Unfortunately, early on in pregnancy I didn't have much choice. One of the only times I did, a member of staff came into the toilets to tell me there was an important call for me. No-one else in the other cubicles. I may have well written "I WAS POOING" on my forehead when I came back into the office.

As I was the manager, it did slightly cross my mind to sack her

shakeandvac Thu 29-Aug-13 01:24:23

She's lying! She needs to fart every now and again. She'll blow up.

maddy68 Thu 29-Aug-13 01:27:47

I honestly have never done a poo at work. I think I am a bit phobic about toilets. I can only go on my own toilet, my mums and my best friends.
I get really I'll on holiday as I genuinely can't go!

MrsKoala Thu 29-Aug-13 01:34:27

I would never have farted at my desk in my old job - open plan office with everyone sitting very close. It was so hard when i was pregnant. I would have to get up and walk to the loo while clenching my arse tight. I am a quick, non splashy and quite non stinky pooer, so i would time it and be in and out quicker than a wee would have taken.

Chattymummyhere Thu 29-Aug-13 01:59:11

Only poop in my house and farts are reserved for between 7am-9am unless I'm on my period then I will go somewhere far away... Also no poops at home between 6pm-11pm as dh is home and awake, unless I'm ill but then I only poop about once every 3/4 days

EBearhug Thu 29-Aug-13 02:08:30

Surely people at least try to control a fart so it doesn't burst out noisily in the middle of the office?

Because you know it would be at that moment thst all the clicky keyboards and chinking coffee mugs and annoying ring tones and people on the phone and chatting - it would be at the moment you decide to risk a noisy fart that it all goes silent.

digerd Thu 29-Aug-13 07:08:51

Well, now I am an 'old fart', I remember I never did either when I was working and younger, despite eating loads of currysgrin.

Now I am retired it seems a permanent whirlwind of turbulance going on in my guts - but has no smell. My bathroom too is stink free. smile

forevergreek Thu 29-Aug-13 07:29:40

Of course. You only fart if your body has foods which have rotted in stomach and give of gas. If you are eating correctly and pooing regularly there is no reason to ever fart

Beaverfeaver Thu 29-Aug-13 08:00:24

I have only pooed at work once when I was quite ill.

Otherwise I alsways poo at home

BlackholesAndRevelations Thu 29-Aug-13 08:01:23

forwvergreek that can't possibly he true. Vegetarians fart loads and they eat healthy diets of veg and pulses wink

Poo at work? No way. Fart- yes of course, silently.

livinginwonderland Thu 29-Aug-13 08:17:11

I only poo at work when it's an 8 or 10 hour shift. Otherwise, I normally go before I leave and then when I get home. tmi

Rufus20 Thu 29-Aug-13 08:19:42

Work is about the only place I do poo

LimitedEditionLady Thu 29-Aug-13 08:26:15

Tbh ive never pooed at work,just how my body clock is i guess!

FriskyHenderson Thu 29-Aug-13 08:27:34

I used to work with someone famed for going to 'have a word' with someone, letting off a pungent silent fart and then walking away.

I have farted in an empty lift at work and then realised there is CCTV (does it have sound?) Over the years I must have pooed at work, I might have gone to another floor (which in itself is a give away).

I used to live with someone who could only poo in one toilet at home and it was so restrictive.

scarletforya Thu 29-Aug-13 08:28:51

I'll never understand this! Who cares if someone poos! Everyone poos. What's with the poo shame?

I can't bear the idea of holding a poo in my body when it's ready to come out. The thought of it stewing in there is revolting! envy boak!

DuelingFanjo Thu 29-Aug-13 08:30:21

I poo at work, most days. If you have to go then you have to go. Guess what? Shit smells. All these prissy people who refuse to poo at work and complain when the communal toilets smell really annoy me. Most of all I hate it when people spray perfume around like a maniac in the loos. Urgghh.

CharlotteBr0nteSaurus Thu 29-Aug-13 08:31:36

i will happily poo at work

anyone who has read my contribution to the Piles thread will understand my keenness to avoid impaction

the non-pooers are doing themselves no favours

magimedi Thu 29-Aug-13 08:34:22

When I have to go I go. It's a normal function. No wonder there are so many people with bowel problems & that the sale of laxatives is so high.

You would think we were living in Victorian times with all this embarrassment about bodily functions.

MrsWolowitz Thu 29-Aug-13 08:35:04

If I need a poo a dim at work then ill poo at work.

Why wouldn't I?

MrsWolowitz Thu 29-Aug-13 08:35:49

And I'm, not a dim hmm

madasa Thu 29-Aug-13 08:37:24

<<<<longs for a job where there is time to poo let alone discuss it....sigh<<<

whois Thu 29-Aug-13 08:37:52

Why is there poo shame? As long as you leave the loo clean what's the problem? I pop at work. Not intentionally but if I need to go when I'm at work I go!

DownstairsMixUp Thu 29-Aug-13 08:41:41

I don't poo at work but then i only poo every other day so i rarely need to. Pretty sure plenty of others do though the state the bowl is left in sometimes. hmm

MrsDavidBowie Thu 29-Aug-13 08:53:01

None of my children have ever done a poo at school, and they are 17 and 14.

HoobleDooble Thu 29-Aug-13 08:58:36

I only work 3 hour mornings, so there's no excuse but I have pooed at work on a couple of occasions. I do try to time it with my visit to the bank, and use the public loos in the nearby precinct.

I also go to the toilet to trump as I'm in an office with only one other person so, unless I fall lucky and we have a client waiting, it's quite obvious who did it. Unfortunately a real raspberry escaped as I was passing my bosses office a couple of weeks ago, she was dictating at the time and I still wonder if her secretary actually typed "Thrrrrrrrrrump!" halfway through that letter.

VivaLeBeaver Thu 29-Aug-13 09:03:30

I've never had a poo at work. Not in 20 years.

Only poo at home and john Lewis.

Every time I go to JL within five minutes I need a poo and do a massive one which blocks the loo. Every time!

Buddhagirl Thu 29-Aug-13 09:18:37

What? How do you control a fart so it comes out silently?? This is advanced flatulence technique!

forevergreek Thu 29-Aug-13 09:26:25

Of course you can reduce farts. If you eat say a sandwich and piece of fruit after, the fruit will be digested first but be blocked by the heavier sandwich, hence people fart. If you ate the same thing but fruit first then sandwich they would go through your system in order of what digests first, leaving no trapped gases

LittleBearPad Thu 29-Aug-13 09:32:55

Why wouldn't you go if you needed to? I don't get it.

Fine if your body clocks means you only ever poo at 8am like Sheldon but that can't be the norm.

limitedperiodonly Thu 29-Aug-13 09:43:58

A friend never used to poo at work. She once drove home about five miles away when she unexpectedly got the urge. I can't understand how she thought shitting herself in the car would have been better.

Her mother had taught her to hold it in and by the time we met she was 23 and physically couldn't poo anywhere but home without days of trying.

We went on holiday and for a week we couldn't move from the hotel pool because she couldn't face using toilets at the beach. It wasn't a cleanliness thing.

One day she quietly went off and came back a good hour later and announced that she'd 'been' like a toddler. I was pleased for her but not so pleased when I realised she'd taken my book into the loo with her.

Growing up her mother used to insist that shit went in the downstairs loo only. If people went to the other loo she would interrogate them in front of everyone else if she thought they'd a sneaky shit.

No wonder my friend had issues grin She also had horrendous piles.

Weirdly she had no embarrassment about telling us very funny and humiliating stories about what she called her bottom problems.

limitedperiodonly Thu 29-Aug-13 09:45:34

What happens to the queue if you eat banana sandwiches forevergreek? Or jam ones?

EverybodysGoneSurfing Thu 29-Aug-13 09:46:17

Viva, I have that (the needing to go, not the giant thing!)in libraries and bookshops. Apparently it's a real phenomenon...

VivaLeBeaver Thu 29-Aug-13 09:48:30

Its bizarre isn't it, I must feel at home in john Lewis!

I've never needed a poo at work, if I did then I'd go.

thebody Thu 29-Aug-13 09:50:21

your boss needs to find you all more work!😃😃

MissBracegirdle Thu 29-Aug-13 09:53:22

I only poo at 8am grin
Seriously, I am very regular.
If I miss a day it just carries over.

Sometimes I also have a poo in the evening. I really like those days. A two-poo day. I tell dh and he approves.

Anyway, no need to involve work or John Lewis!

iloveweetos Thu 29-Aug-13 09:53:33

lol
If ive needed to poo i do. but farting i dont really do during the day. DP said that i fart alot at night lol

theres a lady at work who always acts grossed out with BO, poo and toilets etc, but every now and again the toilets smell of her perfume that she sprays everywhere. Wonder what shes been doing...lol

AndHarry Thu 29-Aug-13 10:03:28

When I was pg I needed to poo every day at 1pm. No help for it I'm afraid. That wasn't nearly as bad as the male cleaner who used to wee all over the seat in the women's loos hmm Weirdo. He got sacked in the end.

DryCounty79 Thu 29-Aug-13 10:13:44

I have had to poo at work on several occasions, as I can't hold it for long. But I try to go when no-one else is in the toilets, and I always clean up after if there is any evidence left. Can't do much about the smell unfortunately, but I'm not the only pooer so I think others are pretty understanding.

I never fart in public, ever. I hold it in. I've been doing that for years, so am pretty good at it.

angelos02 Thu 29-Aug-13 10:28:39

I've never understood the not pooing at work thing. Some people are so uptight. I'd rather have a shit on work time than my own.

I do not fart or poo at work. EVER.I also tell people this. I don't know why but I have a real issue with this. I also don't fart ever where there is anyone around -including DH(apart from one occasion when I was drunk).
I have also worked in a place for eight years. I also work with children.
Do I know you OP????

MyNameIsSuz Thu 29-Aug-13 10:45:23

I don't ever go at work, but I genuinely don't ever need to, I'm a once a day girl and it's always very first thing in the morning. Maybe your colleague's the same?

facedontfit Thu 29-Aug-13 10:45:28

If you are eating correctly and pooing regularly there is no reason to ever fart

What a boring life that would be. smile Farting is one of the few free pleasures left in life!

angelos02 Thu 29-Aug-13 10:47:22

But why is it an issue? Do you go for a pee at work? I really don't see the difference.

I have no idea why it is an issue (searches memory for some long forgotten incident). I have no issues with going for a wee, in fact I announce said fact often.

squoosh Thu 29-Aug-13 10:52:58

Wow, some people are so uptight. I'm not surprised they don't poo at work, their shit is probably impacted straight to diamonds.

mrspremise Thu 29-Aug-13 10:54:24

T. M. I. What other sort of conversations do you have when you're 'working'? Yes, it's a perfectly natural bodily function, yada yada, but REALLY?! confused

Pennyacrossthehall Thu 29-Aug-13 10:57:52

I am utterly baffled why anyone would be so uptight about pooing at work.

a) Don't be so prissy, you're all adults now.

b) What could be better than being paid to sh*t (to quote an old friend)?

PostBellumBugsy Thu 29-Aug-13 11:02:13

I can never understand how people are so in control of their bowels. If I need a poo, I really need a poo & it is very uncomfortable to hold it in. Obviously, if I am in the middle of a meeting or doing 70 on the motorway, I can restrain myself - but why would I at work? We have flushing toilets in private cubicles!

However, while I'm secretly fascinated on Mumsnet, I would be mortified if a work colleague suddenly started telling me about their bowel habits and particularly if they dropped logs in the work loo or not.

nomorecrumbs Thu 29-Aug-13 11:02:45

Wow, is she really anally retentive as well? Does she label her stapler and count the Post-It Notes?

PixieBumbles Thu 29-Aug-13 11:06:19

I try not to poo at work but sometimes I just have to. I did go through a very lucky phase a few years when I worked in an office where I finished at 5.30 but everyone else left at 5 or 5.15.. My body clock somehow set itself so that I always needed to go pretty much bang on 5.30, just after everyone else had gone home, so I was able to go to the (very nice) staff toilets and poo in peace and quiet.

Those were the days...

Floggingmolly Thu 29-Aug-13 11:08:13

Did she tell you this off her own bat, or did you ask? Conversations in your office must be positively scintillating smile

Brodicea Thu 29-Aug-13 11:13:44

Hell yeah I poo at work. When no-one else is in the office, I even take a book.

Those who say all pooers leave skidders in the pan - not true, all you have to do is pop a bit of paper in the pan before you go (also mutes plopping sounds). Also our loos have toilet brushes if it gets messy.

In my old job one of the loos even had a window so you could poo without leaving a stench, although if you came out of that cubicle everyone knows you pooed. But you know, who cares, we all poo!

NoMoreWasabi Thu 29-Aug-13 11:18:25

I don't understand how people feel the need to poo but then avoid pooing for the next 5 hours until they get home from work. How does that even work?

angelos02 Thu 29-Aug-13 11:24:21

"Who cares, we all poo" Exactly.

It can't be good for you to hold it in surely.

Feminine Thu 29-Aug-13 11:25:29

Matches don't cover the smell.

Just smells like burnt poo IMO.

DP said one of the first things he loved about me was when I let rip a massive fart in his presence blush.... my farts depend heavily on whether I've eaten the wrong things (bread being the worst) and as I have mentioned on the piles thread, I have ibs which sometimes means when I have to poo, I have to! I have known several people who only poo once a week

That is my idea of bum hell

maleview70 Thu 29-Aug-13 11:32:13

I you suffer from IBS then you will poo wherever the nearest toilet is!

Damnautocorrect Thu 29-Aug-13 11:48:48

I never poo'd at work, only farting was the odd slippage after a wee. I also can't poo if oh is home.

Pennyacrossthehall Thu 29-Aug-13 13:46:19

Damnautocorrect I also can't poo if oh is home.

That is very odd. I can understand not in front of him (as it's not a spectator sport, although some folk don't mind) but not when he's in the house?

How long have you been living together? And what do you do if you feel the need in the evening . . . and he's going to be there for another 12 hours?

Bumpotato Thu 29-Aug-13 15:51:07

My workmate that I shared an office with about 15 years ago and I used to almost always go at the same time and have a natter while shitting.

She remains one of my best friends.

I poop at work but don't fart usually. When I was pregnant I had surprise farts that always stank. I used to hope that people thought they belonged to the older chap who sat next to me.

I used to have an app that you entered your salary into and clicked it when you went for a shit at work. When you got back to your desk it would tell you how much you'd earned while pooping!

HokeyCokeyPigInAPokey Thu 29-Aug-13 15:58:03

I don't do either at work, dh finds it astounding that anyone can go a whole day without doing either!!

GoshAnneGorilla Thu 29-Aug-13 17:39:46

It is very bad to hold on poos when you need to go and it definitely causes problems with constipation.

Toilets are made to handle pop and wee and I have no problem using them for their intended purpose.

If I need to fart, I need to fart, although I do try to make sure no one is within whiffing distance.

Babybunny88 Thu 29-Aug-13 17:41:41

No, the colleague in question doesn't have a DH grin

I do label my stapler though!

SilverOldie Thu 29-Aug-13 18:26:06

I rarely if ever pooed when I was working. I guess everyone farts but there are ways of not trumpeting one. One problem is I am claustrophobic and would spend any time in a loo not my own, wondering how I could get out of the cubicle if the lock jammed. Could I squeeze under the door, or climb up and over by balancing on hinges and handles and locks etc. Fortunately never happened.

As a child I would never even do a wee if out with my family for the day. I was absolutely desperate by the time we got home and would be like a bullet out of the car and up the stairs.

i want that app bump!! i love to poo at work, getting paid to shit! great smile

DrHolmes Thu 29-Aug-13 19:17:37

I do as many poos as possibly at work. Saves on toilet tissue at home!

Don't know why people are so embarrassed about it. Everyone shits. What's new?

Does she keep a diary? Honestly, who bothers to remember the location of every poo and fart for eight whole years? Does she have nothing else to think about?

IShallCallYouSquishy Thu 29-Aug-13 19:28:11

I don't like to poo at work. I have a couple of times when I've really needed to but that's it. If I need to fart I go to the ladies and do it rather than at my desk.

That's just me though. I don't poo at other people's houses (except my parents grin) either or in public toilets. My body just doesn't allow it!

mizu Thu 29-Aug-13 20:43:20

This thread has had me nearly crying with laughter grin, it is so funny.

I would poo at work as I do feel that if you need to go, you should go.

I usually poo in the morning before I go to work so don't usually have the need to but have done before.

My problem is that where I work, staff and students alike have to use the same toilets so it is a rare occasion when no one is in them.

Also, in my job I don't very often have the time to have a wee let alone a shit.

And at home I am quite happy to have a poo with the bathroom door unlocked and if DH wanders in so be it.

squoosh Thu 29-Aug-13 20:45:43

My bowels are total slags, they will poo in anyone's toilet.

hagle Thu 29-Aug-13 20:48:21

I don't understand the concept of being picky about what toilets you poo in. They are all the same.

complexnumber Thu 29-Aug-13 20:54:20

Good grief, there has been a lot of pooh threads on here recently.

And it's supposed to be males that are anal!

nightowlmostly Thu 29-Aug-13 20:59:24

I do poo at work when I need to go, but I'll pick a time when I think nobody else will be there, tactical pooing!

I did work with a woman once who would be in the toilet on her phone talking to her kids, whilst pooing noisily. I was shocked that she didn't care who was in the toilets when she was doing it but good on her I guess!

I know we all do it but I still get embarrassed about it and will climb 5 sets of stairs sometimes to ensure privacy when pooing at work! I can need a poo and not go for a good few hours though, I'm not one of those people who needs to go right now with no warning, that must be a stressful way to live!

Capitola Thu 29-Aug-13 21:01:46

I have never, ever done a poo or farted at work.

I never get intense urges to poo and I can easily hold farts in.

I think it's really revolting to poo at work, not including those with IBS blah blah blah.

VitoCorleone Thu 29-Aug-13 21:35:35

This thread has made me cry with laughter.

For the record, i never poo'd at work. I farted, but i worked in a loud environment full of men so nobody suspected me.

I dont poo in anybodys toilet but my own. I try not to when DP is in the house either, my bowels are well trained, i dont even feel the urge/need to go when he or anyone else is around.

So i dont poo at the weekend, but sometimes i have to if its a bank holiday.

VitoCorleone Thu 29-Aug-13 21:36:01

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

VitoCorleone Thu 29-Aug-13 21:37:01

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

VitoCorleone Thu 29-Aug-13 21:37:12

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

VitoCorleone Thu 29-Aug-13 21:37:51

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

squoosh Thu 29-Aug-13 21:52:01

You don't poo at the weekends? shock

squoosh Thu 29-Aug-13 21:54:23

'I think it's really revolting to poo at work, not including those with IBS blah blah blah.'

Ummmmm, what????? What difference does it make if you poo at home or poo at work? Honestly some people are NUTS.

maleview70 Thu 29-Aug-13 22:00:46

Exactly....surely doing a poo is something that everyone does? It is actually weirder that some people find pooing at work weird!

MistyB Thu 29-Aug-13 22:02:37

My DS (8) said 'I'm just not the kind of guy who poos at school.' And indeed he is not! I find it endearing and oh so him!

WipsGlitter Thu 29-Aug-13 22:06:54

I'm LOLing atbthis thread.

I don't mind pooing in work.

I have an office to myself and caught myself raising a bum cheek to fart today.

Capitola Thu 29-Aug-13 22:28:52

I think it's revolting to shit at work because it STINKS! Do it at home! Would people not be embarrassed to take a smelly shit in a cubicle loo with a colleague next to them?

It is not just me - all of my female colleagues feel the same. For some reason, this topic occurs quite regularly because there is one woman on our floor who takes a shit, like clockwork at 10am every day and renders the loos unusable for some time afterwards.

There is a mad rush of women going to the loo just before 10, before the fetid stench descends.

She is notorious for this and is known, rather imaginatively, as 'shits at work'.

xkittyx Thu 29-Aug-13 22:32:36

That's really bitchy of you all Capitola.

squoosh Thu 29-Aug-13 22:33:15

Are the toilets beside your actual desk? Are you watching people squeeze their faeces out whilst you're tapping away on your keyboard?

No, they're in designated shitting zones, y'know, just like they are in our homes.

If I need to shit in work I shit in work.

xkittyx Thu 29-Aug-13 22:35:35

I heard a colleague have a good poo in the next cubicle today. Am now feeling extra fond of her for not being an uptight weirdo.

EndoplasmicReticulum Thu 29-Aug-13 22:38:19

I'm a teacher. I do not fart at work. I can't imagine it would do much for the lesson if the teacher started farting.

I also do not poo, as there is not time. I cannot leave a class to go poo.

ethelb Thu 29-Aug-13 22:57:19

Capitola that is bitchy and it is the rest of you who have issues.

daisychain01 Thu 29-Aug-13 23:04:23

OMG, I'm grossed out with this thread

<rushes off to get room-spray, matches and a fan>

chirpchirp Thu 29-Aug-13 23:16:23

I like to poo at work as often as possible. Just love the feeling of knowing I'm getting paid for it.

Notcontent Thu 29-Aug-13 23:28:56

Some people are completely mad. We all poo. That's what toilets are for. And unless you are ill poos are not that smelly really.

BonaDea Thu 29-Aug-13 23:35:27

I am so surprised by this thread. I knew there were a few people who struggled outside of home but there are so many of you.

Morning is always my poo time and if I'm at work, I'm at work! I clean up after myself so what's the big deal!?

HappyYoni Thu 29-Aug-13 23:42:51

Pooh at work! Pooh at work!

<gets placard>

Damnautocorrect Thu 29-Aug-13 23:47:16

Pennyacrossthehall
We've lived together 5 years.
I cant seem to actually poo when he is home, and he's home. Luckily (for poo purposes!) he works alot!!

selsigfach Thu 29-Aug-13 23:54:36

The first thing I do in the morning is have a poo and then, after shower and breakfast, I'll usually have another. Will have an after lunch poo at work, and maybe another in the evening. It's just the way my body works and I reckon it keeps me slim. The thought of keeping poo trapped in your body all day whilst at work makes me feel quite ill.

LimitedEditionLady Fri 30-Aug-13 00:05:55

How can people not poo when their partner is home?they dont have to come with you you know ....grin revelation here

HE KNOWS

he knows you poo.

nomorecrumbs Fri 30-Aug-13 17:15:11

4 poos a day shock I guess if it's all coming out well, then you just have a remarkable efficient digestive system, selsigfach grin

I love a hot drink in the morning (herbal tea) to get me ready and set up for the day. It's meant to speed up the timing of your movements, apparently.

NuggetofPurestGreen Sat 31-Aug-13 15:03:16

I'm not one of those people who needs to go right now with no warning, that must be a stressful way to live

It isn't really nightowl, personally I think worrying about people hearing or knowing that you poo must be a stressful way to live. Who gives a shit??? grin

ClangerOnaComeDown Sat 31-Aug-13 17:02:57

When you gotta go, you gotta go!

I'm not a bashful pooer, I use the toilet for its intended reason and therefore give it a great sense of purpose smile

Although the funniest pooer I know is a friend who was traveling the uk in his van. At one of his stops he ended up pooing in a plastic bag and hanging it from a tree outside his van. He was worried the wildlife might have taken a fancy to it if he left it under his van. Still get the giggles when I see him grin

LongEaredOwl Sat 31-Aug-13 22:30:02

I have that app, paid2poo, it's hilarious! grin

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