Ok on a serious note I need some advice regarding my old neighbors

(40 Posts)
Longhotsoaks Fri 23-Aug-13 20:50:23

We moved from our old house, at the time I lived in our council house I was bullied and intimated in front of my dc's on a daily basis for three and a half years by both neighbors .

I was to scared to do anything and it made me very unhappy,and my dc's.

We gave our house back in the end and moved into a new house that we bought, today the old neighbor was at the end of our drive, its a dead end, she was watching me in her car and the dc's , I saw her and she that I saw her she then drove of quickly.

I know it is her I have then reg of the car so should I be worried it will start again, I do not think I can face it all over again,wwu do?

Wishfulmakeupping Fri 23-Aug-13 20:52:48

Police straight away no messing have you reported her in the past, if not to the police then the council will have a record of your complaints.
How do they know where you moved to?

I'd try not to panic for a start, it is possible that it was coincidence. Did you report the past abuse to anyone? If you have the reg and she comes back you can go to the police and report it as harrasment.

SarahAndFuck Fri 23-Aug-13 20:53:22

Keep a log of everything with dates and times, registration number and make of car, note of who was in it and what time you noticed them and what time they left and contact the police if it happens again.

Make sure your security is good and perhaps let your new neighbours know if you find you get on with them well enough.

LucyGoose Fri 23-Aug-13 20:56:10

OP - that is a bit scary. Is it possible she is so fixated on you that she has followed you to new home? Why were police not involved when you lived at your previous address? Systematic bullying becomes harrassment, and they should have been charged with that. No one ever stopped this behaviour?
I would call the police - they sound really unhinged. But if you never let the police know the extent of the problems before, they may be reluctant to do anything now.

ReginaPhilangie Fri 23-Aug-13 20:59:42

Call the police?

Longhotsoaks Fri 23-Aug-13 21:08:52

I have a 10 page document on them both, every incident was reported.

We have not moved far they could of followed our car and seen where we live , we still have the same cars ,any reason.

The council did not do anything until we were appointed a new Ha then we were ready to leave I was very depressed at this time and wanted out.

The one who did the intimadating was not involved today it was her side kick because the other neighbor I think may have been warned by Police and Council that I was about to get a injunction on her.

The new neighbors are aware of our situation I chased the car whilst I wa s with them, they came to see if I was alright.

I have informed the old HA and the police and I am taking this very seriously now.

Just wanted a new start now I am not so sure.

MammaTJ Fri 23-Aug-13 21:11:35

Film and report-every time!!

Harassment of this kind is taken very seriously!

Longhotsoaks Fri 23-Aug-13 21:18:18

Thanks waiting for the police and the old Ha to contact me, I am not going to stand for this anymore I want the police to visit her an I want answers.

I do not have a camcorder I am so worried, do not want my children to go through anymore grief and see me freeting back to when I had to sleep in their room because I was scared to sleep.

Thank you to those who have listened it means a lot.

Longhotsoaks Fri 23-Aug-13 21:19:38

Could they find out from redirection of post from the new neighbor that moved to my old house?

SlobAtHome Fri 23-Aug-13 21:24:15

Nothing helpful to add other than I hope this ends for you OP. Nobody deserves that

SeaSickSal Fri 23-Aug-13 21:26:08

Have you got video on your phone? If not could someone lend you a phone which is capable of shooting videos?

LanguageTimothy Fri 23-Aug-13 21:32:16

No they would find out from redirect - it's all done at the post office, the new people won't ever see it.

LanguageTimothy Fri 23-Aug-13 21:33:05

wouldn't sorry wouldn't find out.

Could she just have been visiting someone in your new street?

Longhotsoaks Fri 23-Aug-13 21:35:14

No I have asked around ,its weird she was sat in her car watching me.

how scary!

do you have a camera so you can take a picture if it happens again?

is your house secure? make sure windows and doors are locked at night.

glad the police have a record of whats happened so far.

easier said than done but try not to panic. hope the police can do something

Mia4 Fri 23-Aug-13 22:26:21

I'm sorry OP, it may be innocent but might also be her wanting to continue the abusive bullying behaviour. If you see her again call the police right away and photograph her. Do you have a mobile? You can use the video function on that.

Sister77 Fri 23-Aug-13 22:28:21

No comfort but what a load of sad bastards! Feel for you op but at least your bring proactive! Hope your ok x

LimitedEditionLady Fri 23-Aug-13 22:44:16

Jesus,sitting watching you?insane.You stand strong and dont back down.Maybe she is fixated on fighting you or maybe she was very curious to where you went and thatll be the end of it. Dont rise to any ridiculous behaviour,you are better than behaving like a yob.You will come out in top.All the best xx

Longhotsoaks Fri 23-Aug-13 23:10:24

Had an argument dp said she is here because of me im so mad um crying i can not go through this again i cant .

Longhotsoaks Fri 23-Aug-13 23:15:58

I am just getting my life back together with my self confidence and its like i have been attacked all over again .

shock op you are not to blame for any of this. for some unknown reason, these women have been, and possibly are, targeting you for reasons only they know! THEY are responsible for THEIR actions, NOT you!

i hope you're ok. sorry, but your dp is a twat if he's blaming you angry

Longhotsoaks Fri 23-Aug-13 23:28:26

Thanks Inlove i have gone to bed i am so mad right now my blood is boiling . I had to deal with it on my own i felt like i was trapped with no escape. I tried to say how it made me feel and its now my worst nightmare has come back over again i want to move again.

sweetestcup Fri 23-Aug-13 23:35:24

How scary, my heart goes out to you, last year we went through a really bad experience with a neighbour that eventually meant we had to move to get away, now my children are safe and I have my piece of mind which they took from me. One warning though, after one particularly nasty incident my DH told the Police he had wished he had filmed it on his phone, and basically they said we could be charged if we had did that, yes really! So check that out with your Police first.

Mia4 Sat 24-Aug-13 09:10:24

Longhotsoaks Does you DP make a habit of blaming you? And why did you have to deal with it all alone? He's not sounding very supportive here.

MammaTJ Sat 24-Aug-13 09:11:56

Do you not have a camera on youe phone? Most of them will video as well.

catinabox Sat 24-Aug-13 09:19:21

Oh got poor you. Having been bullied by a neighbours also really do sympathise. When we moved i saw our old neighbour near my work and i literally panicked and was worried about it for weeks. I haven;'t seen her since. That was a year ago.

Perhaps your reaction to seeing this neighbour is a stress reaction and nothing will come of it. (she will probably be working on whoever moved into your old house by now)

But...if you do see her again, contact your local PCSO's mine were absolutely brilliant. really supportive.

FrigginRexManningDay Sat 24-Aug-13 09:26:35

OP you poor thing,hopefully the police and HA will scare the shit out of them. I can't stand this sort of pack hunting,there's something very feral about it. Almost like the people who do it have nothing in their lives.

FannyFifer Sat 24-Aug-13 09:37:11

Your DP sounds like an arse.

Did they physically threaten you previously?

Let them watch you, fucking cunts, phone police every time.
Get a camera and photo or video them.

Don't be scared, it's not your fault.

Longhotsoaks Sat 24-Aug-13 10:03:27

He burys his head a lot i have to deal with it . I wont let it get to me this time thats why i am waiting to see what the police say.

Longhotsoaks Sat 24-Aug-13 10:08:36

Yes was verbally threatned twice infront of my two dcs and the second time she had four mstes with her.

They damaged my kids trampoline threw thingd in our garden encouraged their kids to do so.

The one who did all the threatning was not their it was the other neighbor who did the stirring but she will know where we live now.

Longhotsoaks Sat 24-Aug-13 10:15:30


LimitedEditionLady Sat 24-Aug-13 12:35:56

Have you thought of putting a small cctv camera pointing on your garden?as long as its not pointing at anyones property and you put a little notice on i think thats fine.It could be a nice detterant. If they THINK they are being filmed that will put them off.
Your DP is obviously scared too but you need to be a strong unit.

breakingup Sat 24-Aug-13 12:42:07

What was the reason for them targeting you to start with?

Was there something that happened that caused an argument?

Is there anyone on your new street that she could of been visiting?

Your dp doesn't sound helpful?

TheUnicornsGoHawaiian Sat 24-Aug-13 13:01:50

Did the police come round? I have only skipped through the thread, so may have missed that bit.

What did they say?

Longhotsoaks Sat 24-Aug-13 13:17:17

Have not heard from police yet.

It started by neighbor saying things to other neighbor about things i was meant to said.

Its down to jealously on their part and them not having s life and envious because i did.

Neighbor who threatned me try to say sorry the day i left i ignored her little to late id day.

LimitedEditionLady Sat 24-Aug-13 16:20:40

I thought it might be jealousy.was it the neighbour who apologised who knows where you live now?

Longhotsoaks Sat 24-Aug-13 22:00:13

No she didnt but her side kick does now.

Finola1step Sat 24-Aug-13 22:38:52

Hi long. I didn't want to read and run. I haven't got any useful advice but I did want to say a big, fat well done.

Well done for getting yourself and your family out of the old house. Well done for taking a stand and reporting what has happened. I know it is scary and there must be a part of you that wants to just run. But you are doing the very best thing as a parent - showing your children how to take a stand against horrid people like this.

Def continue keeping notes etc. I do wonder if the side kick was bored and wanted a bit of fun at your expense. Wanting to see if they can still push your buttons. Don't react in front of them. Ignore and report. Good luck.

Mia4 Sun 25-Aug-13 09:46:12

Do you have a mobile phone Long? Record her if ever you see her as proof and given that she's threatened you if you call 999 if she turns up again then they should respond quickly.

Also perhaps ask at the citizens Advice Beauro (or like) and the police about a restraining order? If they are known to be harassers then the police should be able to caution them (if not now then if they try again) and place an order to stop them coming within so many feet.

CCTV is also a good idea and a burglar alarm (through a proper company).

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