cakes

(254 Posts)
pinkglitter Wed 21-Aug-13 13:16:47

I currently make cupcakes and my friend has given me only 3 days notice to make 20 cupcakes for a special occasion , anniversary- she must have known i would not be able to get the bits by three days trouble is I said yes but it is short notice. I don't want t let her down but his is last minute. com

HatieKokpins Wed 21-Aug-13 13:21:37

How could she have known if you didn't tell her? Why did you say yes, then?

Fakebook Wed 21-Aug-13 13:24:22

What bits do you need? Flour, eggs, sugar, butter and icing sugar, cupcake cases and decorations. I can make 40 cakes in 4 hours and I'm not even an expert or sell them.

FredFredGeorge Wed 21-Aug-13 13:24:40

"Can you make some cakes for Friday?"
"Yes!"
"Great I love your cakes!"

vs

"Can you make some cakes for Friday?"
"No, I can't get the bits?"
"Oh, that's a shame, I love your cakes, could I help out with buying stuff?"

YABVU

WorraLiberty Wed 21-Aug-13 13:26:15

Why does it take 3 days to bake some fairy cakes?

lovestogarden Wed 21-Aug-13 13:27:03

I always have cake components in the cupboards. I live in fear of someone saying 'I fancy chocolate/madeira/fruit/polenta cake' and me not being able to rustle one up. This is a habit I inherited form my mum.

aldiwhore Wed 21-Aug-13 13:27:55

YABU.

She hasn't 'given you 3 days notice', she's asked you if you could make the cupcakes for an event that's happening in 3 days time.

You could have said no.

But you said yes, so you'd better get baking.

And agree with others, unless you're baking them individually, 3 days is plenty of time unless you have other orders. Usually I bake cupcakes the day before I need them so they're fresh (when I can be bothered, which usually I can't be) and you can make beautiful cupcakes without ordering whacky stuff.

Now stop moaning and get baking.

This is why I hate cupcakes.

MammaTJ Wed 21-Aug-13 13:29:25

20 cupcakes is less than two batches. Not that big a deal.

Even with fancy decorations, it is not that big a deal.

My DD has given me one days notice that she would like a Hello Kitty cake for her birthday tomorrow. I am doing a night shift tonight, but she will get her cake.

YABU.

What is so extravagent about them that you can't get before then?

I made a pirate ship birthday cake and 36 spider cupcakes in one day last week. 20 cupcakes is nothing.

WorraLiberty Wed 21-Aug-13 13:31:37

Now stop moaning and get baking.

This is why I hate cupcakes.

I have no idea why that ^^ genuinely made me laugh out loud grin

20 cupcakes? With 3 days notice? What's the problem?

I knocked up a Vicky sponge this morning while placating teething 6 mo crawling twins after 3 hours sleep.

Unless she has asked you to fashion them in the image of the Taj Mahal, surely you can bake them in an hour this evening and decorate tomorrow. Voila, job done.

KarmaBiatch Wed 21-Aug-13 13:33:21

just pretend you're a contestant on 'the british bake off' and get cracking..

ViviPru Wed 21-Aug-13 13:46:06

not be able to get the bits by three days assuming you mean bits other than ingredients, Amazon Prime is your friend, my friend. (bloody LOVE Amazon Prime)

she must have known i would not be able to get the bits by three days Really? I would assume that a) 20 cakes wouldn't take 3 days and b) that you would say if it did.

Also, I want a bloody Pirate Ship cake <stamps feet>

SaucyJack Wed 21-Aug-13 13:50:44

Shame for you Luisa Zissman didn't win The Apprentice.

Yabu. Its 20 cupcakes! I could do that by tonight with one trip to asda/ hobbycraft. I really don't understand your beef.

OneLittleToddleTerror Wed 21-Aug-13 14:16:16

I'm intrigued what bits are the OP after! 3 days for 20 cakes?

HoneyDragon Wed 21-Aug-13 14:17:54

What does she want on them that takes 3 days confused

BackforGood Wed 21-Aug-13 14:20:43

Please come and tell us why it would take so long to make a couple of plates of cakes confused

PatriciaHolm Wed 21-Aug-13 14:20:49

OP, did you mean to write 200 not 20?

HoneyDragon Wed 21-Aug-13 14:21:34

Ooooh ood think Patricia, didn't consider a typo

adagio Wed 21-Aug-13 14:23:39

I have visions of elaborate and intricate decorations on cup cakes in three different flavours with 5 different colour combinations…

mmmmmmmm ….. cake…….

[diet not going so easily]

adagio Wed 21-Aug-13 14:24:26

ooo 200 cakes wow now that could be more challenging

I seriously hope that are based on the Taj Mahal. Or a series of 'wonders of the modern and ancient world'. That would be amazing.

If they are, post pictures.

If they are standard swirly icing/glittery shit, YABU.

RobotHamster Wed 21-Aug-13 14:26:57

I don't understand why this is a problem.. is there some specific ingredient thay you can't get?

Lweji Wed 21-Aug-13 14:27:23

Come on OP, is it 20 or 200?

20 is a piece of cake wink

RobotHamster Wed 21-Aug-13 14:27:49

Ah.. typo makes sense.

I could still do it in a day though.

Lweji Wed 21-Aug-13 14:29:59

Could you still ask her to get the bits you need?

OneLittleToddleTerror Wed 21-Aug-13 14:31:35

No, the OP didn't come back and say it's a typo yet. We are all just speculating.

Alwayscheerful Wed 21-Aug-13 14:37:14

Monday I started 24 fairy cakes at 12.00 by 1.00 they were on the WI stall, by five past one they were sold.

I could be bothered to get the mixer dirty.

Come on OP just crack on with it.

Alwayscheerful Wed 21-Aug-13 14:37:50

Meant I couldn't be bothered to get the mixer out!

Do they look like this?

hermioneweasley Wed 21-Aug-13 14:43:37

Dammit, this is making me hungry. If only I coukd bake a cake, but apparently it will take 3 days

HeySoulSister Wed 21-Aug-13 14:45:53

whats the difference between a 'cupcake' and a normal fairy cake?

SaucyJack Wed 21-Aug-13 14:48:24

About 4 quid Soulsister..........

littlewhitebag Wed 21-Aug-13 14:50:54

My sil makes cupcakes and can knock out 200 in no time. Even I could Make 20 in three days. If you can't buy special bits to top the cakes then Improvise?

Boom boom cha.

adagio Wed 21-Aug-13 14:51:22

Do NOT click ^MrsT's* link if you are hungry.

That is all.

That was a high hat to Saucy.

CissyMeldrum Wed 21-Aug-13 14:51:41

My friend is a cake maker ,last week she did a two tier wedding cake and six one tier birthday cakes and 60 cupcakes.

MadBusLady Wed 21-Aug-13 14:55:02

Maybe you are not cut out for the high octane deadline-driven world of cupcake baking.

jojane Wed 21-Aug-13 15:19:16

I'm not a professional but in 3 days I made a 3 tier hello kitty cake with a giant huge hello kitty cake pop on top, hello kitty iced biscuits, hello kitty choc crispy cakes with hello kitty choc on, hello kitty and legoman head cake pops, hello kitty sandwiches, and 4 marshmallow trees. I think pretty much anyone could knock out 20 cupcakes - and even if it's a typo and should be 200, you aren't going to want to make them more than a couple of days in advance otherwise will be stale and horrible

MadBusLady Wed 21-Aug-13 15:33:31

I have now stopped reading about Mesopotamia and am about to make a cake.

I blame all of you.

pinkglitter Wed 21-Aug-13 18:26:56

thank you for all the lovely messages - it was for an anniversary so there would be no way I would be able to get anything delivered in that time as she wants them all 10th anniversary & 18th.
my point was its not much notice.
p.s i don't need rude shit.

ViviPru Wed 21-Aug-13 18:29:27

Oh sorry you feel a bit picked on, I'm genuinely glad you came back! But I still don't really get it....

I understand that you feel it's not enough notice, but I'm a bit baffled by

"so there would be no way I would be able to get anything delivered in that time as she wants them all 10th anniversary & 18th."

ViviPru Wed 21-Aug-13 18:30:28

p.s. I LOVE "p.s i don't need rude shit." grin

If we had tickers, that'd be mine

Eilidhbelle Wed 21-Aug-13 18:30:38

Wait, was it twenty or two hundred? Is it because you won't be able to get the decorations on time?

ViviPru Wed 21-Aug-13 18:34:24

No no no, Eilidhbelle, now pay attention. It's because she wants them all 10th anniversary & 18th see?

confused

Fakebook Wed 21-Aug-13 18:35:38

Wth. Why can't you just get some fondant icing and colour it, cut into star or heart shapes or whatever and write 18th and 40th on it with some food pens and then jazz it up with icing and flowers or some shit? Surely as a cake maker you have decorating equipment at hand?

Nottalotta Wed 21-Aug-13 18:38:06

But what stuff do you need? I made 60 cupcakes and iced them and my sister madedecorations for them on the day before my wedding. Sister also made a sugar craft spray of flowers for my wedding cake. The day before the wedding. Two days before we went into the baking type shop in our very small town and bought the stuff.

MadBusLady Wed 21-Aug-13 18:57:23

Fucks sake my cake looks rubbish. I tried to do icing sugar dusting on top and it looks like it's been in an attic for 20 years. And I look like Marie Antoinette.

The OP's right, this is way too stressful.

I think someone needs to get over themselves.

ViviPru Wed 21-Aug-13 18:59:29

Mad My cake doesn't even exist yet as I have spent the entire afternoon/evening on MN. I'm starting to sympathise with the OP too......

LemonBreeland Wed 21-Aug-13 19:03:18

I'm confused as to why it is so difficult to get stuff, unless you live in the middle of nowhere like me. But then why say yes? confused

mynameismskane Wed 21-Aug-13 19:05:47

Are yo really being serious? I think your friend should go to someone more professional than you as you don't sound very nice at all.

ViviPru Wed 21-Aug-13 19:09:02

no way I would be able to get anything delivered in that time

Are you a resident of mainland UK? I have literally just this minute checked out a Tesco online order which is being delivered tomorrow and I'm currently rinsing Amazon for supplies for our trip on Friday....

Lj8893 Wed 21-Aug-13 19:37:54

I live in a small town and even i could get any cake decorations I needed.

Unless you live in the middle of nowhere, and you don't drive and there's no public transport then I think YABU.

That's not me giving you any rude shit btw, just confused as to why its so difficult to get the decorations you need?!

firesidechat Wed 21-Aug-13 19:57:03

Can't think for the life of me why I'm posting on a cupcake thread, but here goes anyway.

Is it the fancy decorating stuff that you need? Don't you already have some in stock if you bake professionally? I have never made cakes for money, but even I have a cupboard full of sparkly sprinkles and a few food colourings knocking around.

3 days for 20 cakes does seem doable, but maybe I've misunderstood.

MammaTJ Wed 21-Aug-13 20:17:26

So, what is it you are struggling to get hold of within the time frame allowed?

Edendance Wed 21-Aug-13 20:29:00

I do some cakes for money... 3 days is more than do-able, for 20 very easily, for 200 definitely possible. Day 1- go to town of some kind and get supplies, day 2- bake cakes and make any decorations that need drying time like flowers etc, day 3- decorate cakes. Job done! smile

HoneyDragon Wed 21-Aug-13 21:28:39

Vivipru
Poor neglected mixer sad

Doingakatereddy Wed 21-Aug-13 21:41:37

I can't bake for shit, it is very possible it would take me 3 days to make 20 flat cupcakes that rabid toddlers may eat.

P.s I don't need a tirade of 'oh it's fricking easy to bake'! grin

Lweji Wed 21-Aug-13 21:44:27

So, how many were the cupcakes?

And have you said yes (OP) or no (update)?
One anniversary or two?
Confusing.

Sorry, what's the question here? Are you asking if she's being unreasonable?

ZingWantsCake Wed 21-Aug-13 22:46:11

vivipru what's a ticker?

OhDearNigel Wed 21-Aug-13 23:18:48

OP, What is it that you need to get ? I think sugarshack do overnight orders so they could be worth a punt.

When i've had very last minute orders before i do them strictly on the understanding that they would be getting whatver i had to hand. I feel your pain, having moved from a town with 3 sugarcraft suppliers, a hobbycraft and a lakeland to one where i can't buy so much as a 12" box, you dont realise how tricky it is to get things if you're not near a large town with, ahem, middle class shops.

ViviPru Wed 21-Aug-13 23:31:44

HoneyDragon I made one in the end. But it was a total shambles. I realised once the pans were in the oven that I'd used the wrong flour. So I whipped them out to add some baking powder, only to fumble and accidentally tip an entire pan of raw sponge mix down the oven door and into the hinge. It was the most horrendous mess... although PruPuppy thought licking the dripping batter was a jolly wheeze. I can only conclude that karma has bitten me on the arse good and proper after my behaviour on this thread.

Zing tickers are like signatures which appear under your comment in some forums, they're generally sneered at and rightly so round these parts.

OnTheBottomWithAWomensWeekly Wed 21-Aug-13 23:38:36

1) you didn't ask an AIBU
2) you say she must have known you couldn't get the stuff, but you said yes, which means you must be able to get it or you're just shit stirring
3) I could make 20 cupcakes in an hour. Why do you need 3 days?

HoneyDragon Wed 21-Aug-13 23:43:34

ps I don't need rude shit

Well that's probably a good thing, I don't think they sell that next day delivery on Amazon.

But you can get cake decorations.

MamaMumra Wed 21-Aug-13 23:49:05

You've already agreed I presume? 20 cupcakes can be done in no time - have you seen cupcake wars?

Spell it out in sprinkles ? Candles. ?

MidniteScribbler Thu 22-Aug-13 00:56:37

Huh? Twenty cupcakes is half a day, tops.

Or is it one of those "just because I'm home all day she shouldn't expect me to drop everything to help her out" AIBUs? We're all supposed to sympathise that the OP has very busy and important things to do dammit.

ZingWantsCake Thu 22-Aug-13 10:05:12

grin @ I don't need rude shit

MadBusLady Thu 22-Aug-13 10:11:48

Oh no, ViviPru! Yes, tis the cake karma gnomes have got us.

MrsLouisTheroux Thu 22-Aug-13 10:28:51

Do you live in the middle of nowhere?
No shops, no shopping delivery, no Internet to do shopping delivery (but you're on MN so maybe not)?
No oven or bowl perhaps?
I don't see the problem!

purrpurr Thu 22-Aug-13 10:37:20

Op, plz to be with the esplainin', I'm all OMGWTFBBQ. >.<

ViviPru Thu 22-Aug-13 11:11:48

I actually heart this thread. Longtime.

Fakebook Thu 22-Aug-13 12:32:05

One day up OP. 2 more to go. Have you weighed the ingredients out today and popped the cases in the trays?

ZingWantsCake Thu 22-Aug-13 12:34:56

pinkglitter where are you?

tell us what happened - are you or are you not making these cupcakes?
I need to know details of size, flavour, decoration, colour scheme and what kind of cupcake paper you are using.

purrpurr Thu 22-Aug-13 12:40:30

... shock Maybe they're not, you know, normal cupcakes. Maybe they are... <whispers> special cupcakes shock

That would explain the long lead time. You don't get special ingredients overnight y'know... Perhaps a little cooking needed to be done first...

SmiteYouWithThunderbolts Thu 22-Aug-13 12:43:32

Do you need T-rex decorations?

Fakebook Thu 22-Aug-13 12:45:41

Cupcake paper must be made out of gold and the flavour must use something rare, like saffron or mahalepi. She will need time to source the spices, perhaps buy them in the black market in Outer Mongolia. 3 days won't be enough. Well 2 days now.

purrpurr Thu 22-Aug-13 12:47:56

Could be enough if she employed a yak. Yaks are pretty darn fast.

AnneUulmelmahay Thu 22-Aug-13 12:51:00

I think op lives in the Sticks (ho yesh, Sticks suck for last min stuff if your postie don't deliver til 3 pm and you don't quite trust postal in a pinch) [kindface]

ViviPru Thu 22-Aug-13 12:51:15

But Fakebook, surely you'll appreciate that for precision icing, a bespoke piping bag has yet to be woven from silken hairs harvested by moonlight from the testicles of the rare and elusive Cuban Selenodon.... There simply isn't the time.

Oh for goodness sake. It's a fast day and now I really badly want a fairy cake or 20.

Fakebook Thu 22-Aug-13 13:08:01

ViviPru, you're absolutely right. And don't forget, she needs manure from a 5.2 month old unicorn, that has been spoon fed by the Dalai Lama so she can use it for fuel to light her fire. How will she bake the 20 special cupcakes without the special fuel? confused.

ViviPru Thu 22-Aug-13 13:12:13

we're gonna get told off for this aren't we....

fancyanother Thu 22-Aug-13 13:19:21

It must be 200 cupcakes, otherwise the guests would have to be rationed to one each, surely???

Lweji Thu 22-Aug-13 13:21:01

But, for an anniversary, would they really need 200?
How many guests do they have?
How many cupcakes can a guest eat, realistically, at a party with other food?

Fakebook Thu 22-Aug-13 13:24:26

grin

HoneyDragon Thu 22-Aug-13 13:37:15

I live in the sticks
I still managed to make the cake of shame™ at short notice.

And due to a lack of communication get it iced and delivered in 20 minutes.

And I'm not a professional cup cake maker. I'm just a woman. With a dog. Sitting in a kitchen chair wishing the kids would be quiet.

Can yaks cook cakes? I know of some alpaca locally, I hear they enjoy working and can turn their hooves to anything. In fact I'm sure I know of a couple available for hire.

TramadolDaze Thu 22-Aug-13 13:41:14

Now if we're talking tickers........

* I'm just a woman. With a dog. Sitting in a kitchen chair wishing the kids would be quiet* ..............except I'd change 'the kids would be quiet' to 'everyone would fuck off'

grin

I did 96 Bollywood themed cupcakes in four hours a couple of weeks ago. Beat that in the cupcake misery stakes!

Emilythornesbff Thu 22-Aug-13 13:41:45

I need to know about these cakes.
Are you up to your elbows in buttercream and silver dragees?

purrpurr Thu 22-Aug-13 13:46:55

This thread is totally saving my mental health today. Thank you for The Mystery of The Cupcakes Op cake

zzzzz Thu 22-Aug-13 13:47:27

grin

I love "have you weighed the ingredients yet?"

They better be bloody good if they take that long grin

candycoatedwaterdrops Thu 22-Aug-13 13:50:55

"I don't need rude shit."

Sadly, AIBU is the home of rude shit.

candycoatedwaterdrops Thu 22-Aug-13 13:51:40

I want cake now but I have no ingredients and no energy to go to the shops either. sad

adagio Thu 22-Aug-13 13:53:47

as a complete aside, never, ever input the ingredients for a batch of cakes into my fitness pal after you have eaten the uncooked batter and feel rather sick. I now have no calories left for lunch or tea and I blame this thread.

HatieKokpins Thu 22-Aug-13 14:18:21

My shit is never rude, thank you. How's the baking going? Got your shit together, OP?

Lweji Thu 22-Aug-13 14:30:39

Maybe she means 20 of these.

That might present a colossal challenge.

Perhaps she's struggling to find what to do with the rest of the two days and 23 hours she had left and that's why she's not been back.

Dolallytats Thu 22-Aug-13 14:47:56

Oh Lweji, I NEED the carrot cake one!! I want cake now.....

StudentFuming Thu 22-Aug-13 15:07:03

....i'm just going to knock up 20 cupcakes quickly because i really want cake now. grin

StudentFuming Thu 22-Aug-13 15:09:55

maybe pinkglitter lives on a tiny island somewhere ..or up a mountain where there are no shops that sell icing sugar...

we didn't think of that....

Lweji Thu 22-Aug-13 15:11:49

Tibet?

Those giant cupcakes feed 6-8 and cost $42. They've got to be having a laugh!

I really badly need the peanut butter one though. Sob.

ViviPru Thu 22-Aug-13 15:30:50

Yeah that one is saying suggestive things to me through the screen too, farewell. Mmm salty.....

salty and sweet. Oooh

HoneyDragon Thu 22-Aug-13 15:41:21

Student wouldn't she also be somewhat lacking a customer base too? Thus no need to make cup cakes.

HoneyDragon Thu 22-Aug-13 15:41:57

I now have a hankering for marshmallow Krispies ....

ViviPru Thu 22-Aug-13 15:42:16

Salty sweet fan? Get you chops round these

We can pass a bag around on the Mystery of the 20 Cupcakes bench while we wait in vain for the OP's return...

Yes op - please tell us what kind of cupcakes you want to bake?

There must be a shop where you can nip to and get ingredients.

If you make them can you put a pic on your profile?
I love cake porn cake

StudentFuming Thu 22-Aug-13 15:45:16

Maybe there is a small cluster of lone houses at the bottom of the tibetan mountain whose inhabitants may occasionally require cupcakes..

HoneyDragon Thu 22-Aug-13 16:11:53

The BEST sweet and salted popcorn is the big Tescos bag for 80pence. I have concluded this through strenuous and extensive research.

Marshmallow crispies now sat setting nicely Thankyou.

HoneyDragon Thu 22-Aug-13 16:15:01

Anti cake porn...

Honeydragons Cake Of Shame?

HoneyDragon Thu 22-Aug-13 16:15:42

? Is a ™ btw

MrsLouisTheroux Thu 22-Aug-13 16:18:24

That's a good cake honey Who got to chop his head off cut it?

ChippingInHopHopHop Thu 22-Aug-13 16:18:43

If you don't need 'rude shit' - then don't post 'silly shit'.

You make cupcakes.

You were asked to make 20 cupcakes.

She wanted 10th & 18th decorations on them.

.........???????????????????????.....................

Unless she wanted them made with hand carried water from Lourdes I'm failing to see a problem here.

I don't 'make cupcakes'.

I don't bake these days so have nothing in for baking.

I could make and decorate 20 cupcakes, to professional standard, in 3 hours - let alone 3 days.

I hope to god you aren't trying to make money out of baking cupcakes.

HoneyDragon Thu 22-Aug-13 16:23:30

The recipient lovingly kept the head in a box. I shit you not.

That went from a pink and purple chocolate sponge, to iced and delivered in well under half and hour. Thank god I store butter at room temp.

StudentFuming Thu 22-Aug-13 16:23:31

Because of this thread, i've just eaten two packets of biscuits. I hope you are all happy with yourselves...............

Silverfoxballs Thu 22-Aug-13 16:25:06

I really don't like cupcakes, they are not proper cake. Proper cake is brown or yellow, I hate icing.

Lweji Thu 22-Aug-13 16:26:45

I was wondering if that was a boy or a girl, and why would a boy have so many flowers on a cake, until it dawned on me that it must be the Bieber. Dough!

Mmm salty sweet popcorn. Damn this 5:2 diet. Still staying strong despite there being a tea loaf in the kitchen.

Lweji Thu 22-Aug-13 16:28:22

I love butter icing.

To bake or not to bake tonight... Do you think I might be finished before Sunday?

HoneyDragon Thu 22-Aug-13 16:33:00

Depends. If you're a professional you'll be lucky to be done by Sunday, if you are just a rank amateur than you'll be finished by tea time tonight.

MadBusLady Thu 22-Aug-13 16:34:11

Ye gods, do you realise you can get "electric cupcake makers"?? We are living in the end times, people.

HoneyDragon Thu 22-Aug-13 16:35:20

I bought one of those when my oven packed in grin, it was great.

Fakebook Thu 22-Aug-13 16:38:49

I've just put some cakes in the oven and will ice them later. OP, where are you up to?

MadBusLady Thu 22-Aug-13 16:40:32

I like your priorities, Honeydragon. Roast shmoast, casseroles meh, pasta bakes bleh. CAKE. NO MEANS TO MAKE CAKE. AAAAAAAAAAH.

fancyanother Thu 22-Aug-13 16:42:13

Don't go to Cineworld, buy a medium popcorn deal with diet coke thinking it's a low cal alternative to a hotdog and then put it into myfitnesspal shock

MadBusLady Thu 22-Aug-13 16:42:40

Look, you could also have bought this Electric Pie Maker which is apparently "a lot less hassle than firing up the oven".

Well, that's a relief. <downs coal shovel, wipes black rag across face>

fancyanother Thu 22-Aug-13 16:44:03

They get 4 hours to do the showstopper challenge on Great British Bakeoff!

HoneyDragon Thu 22-Aug-13 16:44:50

MadBusLady clearly, you were in my house at the time grin

HoneyDragon Thu 22-Aug-13 16:45:37

Now I have a hankering for scotch pies .....

Lweji Thu 22-Aug-13 16:48:27

There's also the 5 min cupcake
Who needs an oven?

Lweji Thu 22-Aug-13 16:50:23

I certainly hope not to fire up my electric oven!

MrsBucketxx Thu 22-Aug-13 16:59:39

Op probably feels a bit silly, well a lot silly.

I only ever make batches of 24 anyway cause they go too fast I inhale them blush

The only reason it would take me 3 days to make a batch of fairy cakes is because I spent the intervening 2 days and 22 hours scoffing the 4 previous batches I had made. ..

weirdo

ChippingInHopHopHop Thu 22-Aug-13 17:58:40

grin

JerseySpud Thu 22-Aug-13 18:08:08

yabu

and why is it anyone who can bake fairy cakes nowadays without burning them suddenly makes cakes to order?

Lj8893 Thu 22-Aug-13 18:13:33

I have just bought and ate a pack of doughnuts because of this thread.

I would have made cakes instead but wanted them now, not in over 3 days time.

grin jersy

HoneyDragon Thu 22-Aug-13 18:35:18

I don't bake to order

Well unless you count the dcs coming in the kitchen and wailing

Caaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaake

Ad infinitum until I switch the oven on.

ViviPru Thu 22-Aug-13 18:50:01

I love it when people call cupcakes "fairycakes" it must be so irksome to the wannabe cupcake professionals.

HoneyDragon Thu 22-Aug-13 18:54:14

A properly done little fairy cake with a blob of buttercream in the wing divot and lightly dusted with icing sugar "wings" is a thing of beauty.

ViviPru Thu 22-Aug-13 18:58:48

Amen to that. I've got the Prospero out and am now attempting Vicky Sponge Take Two. Self raising self raising self raising self raising self raising self raising.

HoneyDragon Thu 22-Aug-13 19:23:37

Viv

You need self raising flour

Ooh Viv are you the vicky sponge woman from a previous thread about the weird names people call food? Like Tommy K for ketchup? I've called it a vicky sponge ever since. grin

PresidentServalan Thu 22-Aug-13 19:59:36

..... and THIS is why I love MN! I thought this was going to be a boring thread.... grin

MrsAlanKey Thu 22-Aug-13 20:06:55

I would give worlds for a cup cake right now and I don't even like the fuckers

ZingWantsCake Thu 22-Aug-13 20:38:48

pink

if you find later that the cupackes are no longer required by your customer could you decorate them with members of the Sylvanian (?) family and take them to Tidy's Gluezilla's wedding reception?
(interthread co-operation)

grin

nobutts Thu 22-Aug-13 20:45:00

This is the fucking best thread ever. I've pooped myself with laughter a number of times now. Thank you, thank you very much. I have a very vivid image of pinkglitter in a flour strewn kitchen desperately trying to separate cake cases with tweezers and painting 10's and 18's in the air with tempered chocolate, hurling edible glitter at them and hoping they'll set before they hit the ground.
I think it's also incredibly important that we remember that she said yes to this.
Also pinkglitter, I hope you can come back and laugh after you've made the cakes.

Op COME BACK sad

We were only teasing...
We want to know more.

Notafoodbabyanymore Thu 22-Aug-13 22:42:06

This thread has had me snorting with laughter.

Now I wanna eat bake cupcakes, but I'm busy for the next few days...

goldface Fri 23-Aug-13 00:02:51

Ah...you funny, funny lot. Have had a shitter of a day, including pmt, overstaying guests and an unexpected bill, and yet I go to bed with a smile on my face. Thank you mumsnetters.

ZingWantsCake Fri 23-Aug-13 00:18:57

pink will you make me just one cupcake please?
I know it's short notice, but it's my birthday today and I'd like a special cupcake that looks like this:

.......♥......
..@@@@..
~~~~~~~
.\\\\||||////
..\\\|||||///

any chance, pretty please? grin

MamaMumra Fri 23-Aug-13 00:21:05

OP is now very busy making 20 cupcakes, one at a time.

ZingWantsCake Fri 23-Aug-13 01:09:00

mama

I now suspect pinkglitter may have run out of pink glitter.
that might be the cause of panic?confused

MamaMumra Fri 23-Aug-13 01:41:14

I'd just use ordinary glitter, or even glitter glue at this late stage Zing grin

MrsKoala Fri 23-Aug-13 02:41:04

grin

For those of you who like sweet and salty have you tried dipping salt n vinegar crisps in nutella or peanut butter and chocolate spread stripey (if you can still get it over there)?

Lweji Fri 23-Aug-13 07:34:18

Perhaps her problem is that she only accepts perfect cakes and throws away any that aren't.

Fakebook Fri 23-Aug-13 09:26:11

It's the final count down OP! One day to go! We're all here cheering for you! 👏👏👏👏🎂🎂🎂

ZingWantsCake Fri 23-Aug-13 10:20:20

<opens mouth wide to catch any thrown cupcakes>

MidniteScribbler Fri 23-Aug-13 10:31:36

Maybe she doesn't have the dough to buy the ingredients?

MadEyeMoodyBitch Fri 23-Aug-13 12:45:00

This op reminds me a bit of rosepetel(sp?) But much, much better.

I am bumping. I will continue to bump for all eternity until the Op comes back and with a tale of cupcake success against all the odds.

HoneyDragon Fri 23-Aug-13 13:39:50

We don't actually know what the odds were.

ViviPru Fri 23-Aug-13 14:34:55

Haha MamaMumra when it comes to precision Tibetan cupcakery, it's a one-at-a-time process, for sure.

Incidentally, my Vicky Sponge MKII was an unbridled success (it is in fact now a raspberry and mascarpone picnic gateau but that is neither here nor there).

I think I will eternally feel as though there is something missing from my life if we never get to find out what became of pinkglitter and The Worlds Most Time Consuming Cupcakes sad

HoneyDragon Fri 23-Aug-13 14:39:22

It is not fair of her to tease us this way sad

purrpurr Fri 23-Aug-13 14:47:36

I just know, in a conversation about making cupcakes in the future, I am going to say something like 'they take three days to make y'know!' <pause for comedy effect> <other person looks completely baffled> '... Oh, right, you had to be there. On the Internet. No, but it was really funny...' <winces in advance>

I already say AyeBoo to my DH. I am probably the only MN member to do that so I'm not even going to explain myself...

Do you think pinkglitter will name change? That would be just so annoying. I will be thinking of her friend tomorrow in a twisted agony of not knowing whether she got her 20 gold-encrusted fairy cakes.

MadBusLady Fri 23-Aug-13 14:55:18

Well, the odds were very good, basically weren't they. So this thread is a sort of suspenseful tale for the anxious and nervously afflicted who can't cope with anything more perilous which is why I keep returning.

HoneyDragon Fri 23-Aug-13 15:01:07

You know we have actually been speciest too,and assumed the op is human?

What if she is actually a Borrower? But her friend is a full size human? That would take longer as they will ned a crane to get the ingredients, and it would take days to shovel the mix into the cases.

I am feeling shame.

KarmaBiatch Fri 23-Aug-13 15:09:31

I hope the unicorn was ready to trot them over to the friend in a beautiful box made of clouds..

I hate you all. I was going to tidy the house. Really I was. Think I'll make cakes instead...

We've got a meccano crane the OP could borrow. Actually, having said that, I've no idea where it's gone. Blimey!

Lweji Fri 23-Aug-13 15:37:09

(Very disappointed that this thread has not made it to the Round-up.) sad

Willdoitinaminute Fri 23-Aug-13 16:07:34

In the time it has taken to read this thread I have lost the will to live could have made 40 cup cakes decorated them and eaten them! Give me a good old fashion fairy cake decorated lovingly by hand with the help of a child.
When it comes to cake less is more with regard to decoration - less crappy icing and more moist well made cake.
I am now inspired to make a Victoria sponge for the weekend. Kills two birds since ds is getting bored and loves cooking.

Crikeyblimey Fri 23-Aug-13 16:30:49

Well just to chuck my two penneth in...

I've made 4 chocolate cakes (ready to turn into a very retro Black Forrest Gateaux), a gluten free orange cake (recipe courtesy of the lovely MNers,) roasted a ton of veg for a couscous salad, boiled 2kgs of new potatoes and am currently roasting a 5kg rolled turkey joint. All since 10am.

20 cupcakes - piece of cake.

ViviPru Fri 23-Aug-13 16:35:41

Friends Of This Thread could unite and make a cupcake each. We could then send next-day delivery to the OP. if we're quick we'll just catch the post!

<rolls up sleeves>

Lweji Fri 23-Aug-13 16:39:07

But then, if we do her work, how will she learn?

hmm

KarmaBiatch Fri 23-Aug-13 16:39:13

Vivi

I'll do my bit by going to costco and buying the cupcakes if you send the OP the 18th and 19th anniversary adornments..

I will stick my fingers in a few of the cupcakes to make them look more 'homemade', might sprinkle some sweat on them too.. just for added autenticity grin

KarmaBiatch Fri 23-Aug-13 16:39:50

*10th

purrpurr Fri 23-Aug-13 16:41:03

I can't bake! <panics> Can I just buy one to send?

KarmaBiatch Fri 23-Aug-13 16:42:06

purrpurr you could send the candles grin

ViviPru Fri 23-Aug-13 16:46:50

Deal. I'll just get them on a next day from Amazon Prime like the OP could have done

Oh god Honeydragon, what if she fell not the NHL of ake mixture and got eaten by a dog or something? Can we get MNHQ to sound the octoalert?

ViviPru Fri 23-Aug-13 16:50:59

She's never coming back is she sad

lunar1 Fri 23-Aug-13 16:52:55

FFS I hate you all, am now in the kitchen making fairy cakes. I had a busy afternoon of doing nothing planned.

Lweji Fri 23-Aug-13 16:55:50

No, she won't be back, because she needs polite shit.

KarmaBiatch Fri 23-Aug-13 16:55:52

lunar are they to send to the party? did the OP pm you to tell you that she failed miserably?!

Alibabaandthe40nappies Fri 23-Aug-13 16:59:18

I've been ignoring this thread but DS1 is forcing me to watch Wall-E with him for the 100th time so I thought I would have a glance through.

grin So glad that I did!

lunar1 Fri 23-Aug-13 17:02:19

If I can get them to the post office without eating them I'll send them. Don't have any sylvanians, will Lego men do or will that ruin the theme?

Runningchick123 Fri 23-Aug-13 17:07:29

Oh my days, I started reading this thread thinking it would be boring but ended up laughing so much that I had to hibernate in the kitchen for 20 minutes Until I could stop laughing as my children were looking at me as though I've gone stark raving bonkers. My eyes were streaming with tears from laughing but at least i managed not to wet my knickers.
I'm going to have to make some cakes tonight.
Does anybody have a good recipe for dairy free buttcream that doesn't take 3 days to make?

KarmaBiatch Fri 23-Aug-13 17:11:09

lunar I think legomen would ruin the theme..

Could you not nip out to the garden and collect rabbit poos and put them on the cakes? you could send them along with a note saying "sorry, tried to get the sylvanian rabbits to sit on the cakes for 3 days, but they shat themselves at the thought of being eaten"!? I'm sure the party organiser would understand..

lunar1 Fri 23-Aug-13 17:15:34

Karma, no rabbit poo available but don't worry fil left a packet of senna last time they stayed and they look pretty similar.

KarmaBiatch Fri 23-Aug-13 17:17:52

now THAT is irony!! haha, a laxative in replacement for rabbit poos. genius, PURE genius!

mrspremise Fri 23-Aug-13 17:19:47

Grr, hate 'cupcake people', they take it waaaaay too seriously. I don't want to eat half a pound of buttercream and a shitty piece of rice paper on a cocktail stick, just give me a decent sized bit of cake! By the way, I live in a minute, remote hilltop village and I can get next day delivery on all sorts of stuff. I madey friend's WEDDING cake and even that didn't take me three days. Get a grip, love... or just some balls and learn to say no!

Lweji Fri 23-Aug-13 17:23:10

I don't want to eat half a pound of buttercream

Often, I could do without the cake, I have to admit.
blush

HoneyDragon Fri 23-Aug-13 17:35:47

Christ, those Costco cupcakes are fucking terrifying. I bought a couple of boxes into work once and what was left people took home for their dc.

My friend took one home for her 8 yo dd. Who after going Squee, actually started crying confused. When her mum asked what was wrong it turned out that she was simply overwhelmed by its sheer massivity and didn't know where to start so burst into huge wracking sobs at the enormity of the task ahead. grin

KarmaBiatch Fri 23-Aug-13 17:46:18
Lweji Fri 23-Aug-13 17:48:39

Not this one I hope...
It looks too much like...

KarmaBiatch Fri 23-Aug-13 17:50:28

Ha!! Look how hairy the OP's arms are..!! Some of those hairs could be added to that cupcake to make it look like some pubes were caught in the steaming turd whilst it was being squeezed out on the table!

LittleEsme Fri 23-Aug-13 17:53:39

My tin makes 20 at a time, and since I have 2 tins, I would have made enough mix to make a small at least another 10 batch for me grin

OP mix for fairy cakes is the easiest in the world and even a numpty like me can do it at 3 days notice.

Fakebook Fri 23-Aug-13 18:05:25

THIS is why OP needed 3 days. It all makes sense now! Come to think of it, we had a rainbow here yesterday <rubs chin>....

Damnautocorrect Fri 23-Aug-13 18:09:37

My local sainsburys do all the fancy bits and sugarpaste if you have the cutters

slapandpickle Fri 23-Aug-13 18:11:56

dairy free buttcream....

shock

cake is cake
cupcakes are not cake, they are models of cakes

MadBusLady Fri 23-Aug-13 18:27:02

Ooooh. What could biscuits be models of?

Edendance Fri 23-Aug-13 18:35:37

Cheesecake without the cheese??

rockybalboa Fri 23-Aug-13 18:49:17

Fucking love this thread. Snorting at Borrowers, unicorns and rabbit poo. And you know that OP can't help but keep reading but hasn't yet formulated the appropriate snippy come back. Fingers crossed...

Runningchick123

"Does anybody have a good recipe for dairy free buttcream that doesn't take 3 days to make?"

You really asking for a recipe for buttcream? On MN? On a Friday night? grin

I just follwed Karmabiatch's link. and I would like to say, to the designer of this cake -

SPELLING - You're doing it wrong!

(Please ignore the irony of my typo in the above post blush )

DaftAda Fri 23-Aug-13 19:20:33

May I suggest that Waitrose Bottom Butter is edible and dairy free?

ZingWantsCake Fri 23-Aug-13 19:22:49

what I don't get is you all overlooked the most important fact on this thread, so I repeat:
It's my BIRTHDAY!

cake
cakecake
cakecakecake
cakecakecakecake
cakecakecakecakecake
cakecakecakecakecakecake

21 slices of cake - enjoy!

Therealamandaclarke Fri 23-Aug-13 19:28:30

Happy birthday

cake wine thanks cake

purrpurr Fri 23-Aug-13 19:40:55

Ziiiing! Happy birthday! Have cake and wine

Lweji Fri 23-Aug-13 20:27:09

Happy birthday!!!

Loving my cake, thank you.

I went shopping after work and now I have the butter, I have the flour, I have the eggs, I have the sugar and everything else.
But, I can't be arsed to make any cakes. At this rate it may well take until Sunday... blush

Runningchick123 Fri 23-Aug-13 20:29:29

Buttcream - only I could make that typo on such an off the wall thread grin.
Can't start laughing again, my husband is home now and will phone the psychiatric ward to come and get me if I start behaving strange again.

KarmaBiatch Fri 23-Aug-13 21:50:44

runningchick there is a product called 'monkey butt', don't know if it's dairy free though.. Maybe it's just made up of the bodies of 1000 ground monkeys? Does that help? :D

trixymalixy Fri 23-Aug-13 21:59:12

grin at buttcream!

My recipe for dairy free buttERcream= nip to Tesco and buy a tub of Betty Crocker's frosting.

Runningchick123 Sat 24-Aug-13 07:46:54

Betty crocker frosting is not guaranteed dairy free - the label says it may contain milk sad. I so wish some company would make a dairy free frosting -- as I'm a lazy git who likes the easy life-- so my son can enjoy nice cakes. Or maybe i contact the OP who is a professional cake maker and give her 6 months notice of needing a gluten and dairy free cake. Would 6 months be enough notice to get the ingredients?

I use M&S dairy free margarine to make butter icing. It turns out ok honestly.

Runningchick123 Sat 24-Aug-13 07:58:33

Thanks caffeine drip . Does it turn out ok as all my attempts with dairy free marg have turned out quite oily. Might try switching to the m&s one as so far I have tried vitalite dairy free and pure margarine and had no success.

I always find it turns out ok. But I do have a KA so can get it well mixed and light.

It's certainly the best marge I've used to make cakes with as well.

ElaineVintage Sat 24-Aug-13 08:28:53

Cupcakes are shit. Much prefer a slice of lemon drizzle.

trixymalixy Sat 24-Aug-13 08:40:38

Runningchick, my DS is very allergic to dairy, he can't eat chocolate wuth a may contain milk warning and he has an epipen, but has never had an issue with Betty Crocker icing. I used to make it with pure but it was never very nice so I don't bother and just buy Betty Crocker now.

Lomaamina Sat 24-Aug-13 08:54:12

For non-dairy, try kosher parev margarine (search your supermarket for soft Tomor), assuming you live in a Jewish part of the world).

www.titanics.co.uk/cgi-bin/sh000000.pl?REFPAGE=http%3a%2f%2fwww%2etitanics%2eco%2euk%2findex%2ehtml&WD=tomor&PN=Butter%2ehtml%23a445#a445

KarmaBiatch Sat 24-Aug-13 14:26:57

pinkglitter were your cupcakes delivered with pride.. literally gasping to know!!

ZingWantsCake Sat 24-Aug-13 15:05:18

runningchick
for dairy free buttcream (grin ) try Pure spread in place of butter.

LookingThroughTheFog Sat 24-Aug-13 15:58:54

Today I made a cake for my son's birthday. Well, he did most of the work, being a bit of a baking nut. I am now counting down the hours until we can eat it.

redandblacks Sat 24-Aug-13 16:09:03

I have not read this thread but having joined at page 10, I am wondering how it has grown this long based on Op?

Runningchick123 Sat 24-Aug-13 16:21:36

Thanks trixy . My son has an epipen too for a few different allergens, but dairy being the most severe. I love betty crocker vanilla frosting but was always a bit wary of using it for my son sue to the allergy warning on the label, but I will give it a go seeing as it has already been road tested by another dairy allergic kid.
I have tried the pure marg in place of butter but as that marg is essentially solid vegetable oil I find it doesn't make decent icing.
I'm gonna test a bit of delicious betty crocker and failing that I will try m&s dairy free marg.
Thanks all - I now have the chance of making decent cupcakes and buttercream iced birthday cakes.

I'm not going to be trying the betty crocker on my butt cheeks though for anybody who was wondering grin.

trixymalixy Sat 24-Aug-13 16:28:49

Dairy is DS's worst allergy too (although we don't know how he will react to nuts as he has never been exposed apart from the SPT).

May I recommend the chocolate fudge icing, particularly if you heat the cake in the microwave and serve with dairy free ice cream or cream, mmmm.

Lweji Sat 24-Aug-13 16:33:24

I have not read this thread but having joined at page 10, I am wondering how it has grown this long based on Op?

I suggest you actually read it...

nailslikeknives Sat 24-Aug-13 16:38:34

Snort at
actually a Borrower!
Snort again!
gringringrin

Come on Pink, update us!

Runningchick123 Sat 24-Aug-13 16:39:25

Can't do the chocolate one as DS is sensitive to cocoa - he has to have Carob cakes instead of chocolate cakes sad

Groovee Sat 24-Aug-13 16:46:11

You could have said no OP.

KarmaBiatch Sat 24-Aug-13 17:22:37

maybe pink didn't have enough time in the end due to reading the enormity of this thread..

or maybe she just procrastinated for 2.5 days and finally turned on the oven and rolled up her sleeves..

candycoatedwaterdrops Sat 24-Aug-13 17:42:28

I ate a lovely cupcake today. Just saying. wink

catinabox Sat 24-Aug-13 18:30:41

can someone send a private message to pinkglitter perhaps? I need some closure on this.

Did the cakes get made? Does anyone know?

redandblacks Sat 24-Aug-13 19:08:31

Even I could manage it in three days, unless she was talking about knitted cupcakes in which case I do sympathise

TSSDNCOP Sat 24-Aug-13 20:19:30

Brilliant thread. I have laughed til a little bit of wee came out blush

I'm no baker but wouldn't cupcakes be stale if you made them more than 3 days in advance?

Stripedmum Sat 24-Aug-13 20:22:01

Eh? Is this your business? When I did it I'd take orders up until 6pm the night before and nip to Tesco if needs be.

Running use Pure or Vitalite mixed 50/50 with Trex - I know it sounds revolting, but it really isn't and it sorts out the texture problem.

redandblacks Sun 25-Aug-13 00:07:59

The 3 min microwave cakes are fab - I still make those religiously. you could knock off a batch in ten minutes with a bit of planning

KarmaBiatch Sun 25-Aug-13 01:38:40

red does it take 2 days, 23 hours and 50 minutes of planning..? wink

HoneyDragon Sun 25-Aug-13 09:23:53

Yes Striped. But you are not living up a mountain, on an island in the middle of the country side and actually a borrower.

And you don't have so called friends who are insensitive to the intricated methods of cupcake construction.

You are lucky enough to be a human being who lives near a Tesco.

Poor misunderstood op sad

Stripedmum Sun 25-Aug-13 10:00:59

Pfft!

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