to have called a woman in TK Maxx an "effing idiot" for this...

(194 Posts)
dontsqueezetheteabag Wed 07-Aug-13 12:46:49

she had her child in one of those shopping baskets that have wheels and a pull up handle. Child must have been about 12 months old. Woman turned round to look at something on the shelf and let go of the handle on the basket. Child stood up in the basket and it tipped backwards. The poor child fell with it banging the side of her little head on the tiled floor.

I was TRUELY appaulled by this and muttered "fucking idiot".

Why the HELL would you let your child stand in one of those baskets???!!!!

soverylucky Wed 07-Aug-13 12:48:52

I wouldn't have used the language you did but I would have been annoyed - its an instinctive reaction I suppose. Was the baby ok?

WorraLiberty Wed 07-Aug-13 12:49:11

I'm quite sure she realised what a stupid thing she did once her child hurt itself.

You're lucky you didn't get a punch in the face to be honest.

Feminine Wed 07-Aug-13 12:49:38

No idea. Some people are just totally unaware.

As long as you said it under your breath, then YANBU

JumpingJackSprat Wed 07-Aug-13 12:50:14

Oh well, lesson learned and none of your business. did she hear you judging her for her momentary lapse in concentration?

KellyElly Wed 07-Aug-13 12:50:44

You sound charming. I'm sure she needed that after the shock of her child falling on the floor. Parents make mistakes and children have accidents. I'm sure the shock of it all will ensure she doesn't do it again. Most people would have rushed to help rather than muttering 'fucking idiot' at the parent.

KellyElly Wed 07-Aug-13 12:51:07

You're lucky you didn't get a punch in the face to be honest. << THIS grin

LRDYaDumayuShtoTiKrasiviy Wed 07-Aug-13 12:53:29

I think you were harsh, to be honest.

She fucked up, I bet she knows it. Seeing a child you're meant to be looking after get hurt is absolutely horrible, isn't it? Have you honestly never done something daft, let a toddler fall over, etc. etc.?

TheToysAreALIVEITellThee Wed 07-Aug-13 12:55:05

Haha if you had done that in my nearest tk maxx you'd probably be nursing a thick lip!!

Yabu, yes she was a bloody idiot, but its easy to misjudge something, and tbh she probably feels worse for that than a stupid comment by someone who has clearly never made a mistake in their life, ever

dontsqueezetheteabag Wed 07-Aug-13 12:55:27

It's not the fact that the mother had a slight lapse in concentration and let go it's the fact that teh child was in the bloody basket... surely an accident waiting to happen and not what they are provided for.

The woman did not seem that bothered to be honest and it was under my breath... not directly at the mother.

weeblueberry Wed 07-Aug-13 12:56:21

Oh yeah. When you've made a momentary lapse of judgement when it comes to parenting you absolutely want someone to mutter under their breath about it.


AnnabelleLee Wed 07-Aug-13 12:57:41


LRDYaDumayuShtoTiKrasiviy Wed 07-Aug-13 12:58:33

Well, if you'd said something snippy like 'excuse me, I don't think that's what the baskets are for' before she did it, I think you wouldn't have been unreasonable.

But it's a bit different swearing under your breath someone for inappropriate parenting.

(Btw, I wonder how under your breath it really was ... I'm just waiting for the AIBU 'some random woman muttered 'fuck' and guess what my baby's first word was?' grin)

AnneUulmelmahay Wed 07-Aug-13 13:00:22

Discusting wink

Op did you offer any help

juneybean Wed 07-Aug-13 13:00:45

I don't act bothered when a charge hurts themself as I don't want them to get hysterical. I wouldn't have judged her for that.

Feminine Wed 07-Aug-13 13:00:54

Putting the child in the basket was a very silly thing to do.

I'm with you dont putting her in it in the first place was beyond daft!

I imagine you said/thought what you did out of shock!

Still hope you said it under your breath smile

LazyMonkeyButler Wed 07-Aug-13 13:02:02

Was the baby seriously hurt? Was there blood? I think I probably would have thought "well, don't put your baby in a basket madam" but I wouldn't have said anything in the situation you describe.

Some people are clueless, yes, some people may have forgotten the buggy & been desperate to put the baby down after carrying him/her for a while. It probably isn't something the parent will do again.

dontsqueezetheteabag Wed 07-Aug-13 13:02:47

I did offer help and went to pick up the child. The mother took a few seconds to notice and I saw it happening. The mother and staff from the shop ended up dealing with the baby who was absolutely hysterical.

rockybalboa Wed 07-Aug-13 13:03:50

Do you even have children OP? I bet you anything the child had made an almighty fuss about getting into the basket and it's mum said, "no, you'll fall out and hurt yourself" but the child kept going on and on and on so she let it go in and oh look it fell out. Mummy proved right, child learns lesson. Fellow shopper muttering abuse under their breath: totally unhelpful and very unnecessary. So yes, YABU.

MissDuke Wed 07-Aug-13 13:04:31

My ds got hurt in TK Maxx once. He was simply walking round a corner at the end of a rail of clothes, and walked straight into the corner of a mirror - it was angled in such a way that there was no chance of him seeing it and just the right height for a 2 year old to get whacked in the face :-( He was marked really badly, and cried for ages. I went and reported it in the hope that they would put something on the side of the mirrors so it wouldn't happen again!

Anyway, that was very off topic! But I was so upset when he got hurt, I am sure the woman you saw was too, and was bound to have realised her mistake :-(

MissDuke Wed 07-Aug-13 13:04:31

My ds got hurt in TK Maxx once. He was simply walking round a corner at the end of a rail of clothes, and walked straight into the corner of a mirror - it was angled in such a way that there was no chance of him seeing it and just the right height for a 2 year old to get whacked in the face :-( He was marked really badly, and cried for ages. I went and reported it in the hope that they would put something on the side of the mirrors so it wouldn't happen again!

Anyway, that was very off topic! But I was so upset when he got hurt, I am sure the woman you saw was too, and was bound to have realised her mistake :-(

dontsqueezetheteabag Wed 07-Aug-13 13:04:45

Lazy - theer was no blood as far as I could see but it was a horrible thud on the floor. I am fairly sure the child would have had a huge lump on the side of her head. Maybe even some bruising to her wee face. Awful.

SirChenjin Wed 07-Aug-13 13:04:59

YANBU - she was an effing idiot. Hope the baby was OK, and as others have said, hopefully she'll not do it again.

dontsqueezetheteabag Wed 07-Aug-13 13:07:57

Rocky - I don't have children, however I do have expeirence of being out and about with very young kids (neices, nephews, friends kids) and I DO know that it can be a nightmare! I would NEVER dream of putting a child into a shopping basket... surely that is just common sense?

ImNotBloody14 Wed 07-Aug-13 13:08:39

when toddler ds pulled the shopping trolley on top of himself after climbing on the side while i searched through the whoopsies in asda people rushed to help me and check he was ok- odd that this didn't occur to you confused

dontsqueezetheteabag Wed 07-Aug-13 13:10:00

ImNotBloody14 - I did go to help.... read the thread.

ImNotBloody14 Wed 07-Aug-13 13:11:59

oh so you did help? whilst muttering 'fucking idiot'? i hope that child didn't hear you. and no i don't act bothered when my dcs hurt themselves- it doesn't help them calm down if i'm wetting myself with panic.

limitedperiodonly Wed 07-Aug-13 13:12:38

What is TK Maxx? It sounds perfectly ghastly.

WorraLiberty Wed 07-Aug-13 13:13:53

Ahh you don't have kids but you've looked after a few


NoComet Wed 07-Aug-13 13:14:12

I'd have muttered too and quite possibly not under my breath.

I spent many years very carefully strapping DD1 into trollies because she tried to kill herself if you didn't.

It gets my goat when people just don't think how hard shop floors are.

dontsqueezetheteabag Wed 07-Aug-13 13:15:26

Worra - when I do have children, hoepfully very soon I will NOT be letting them into a shopping basket in a shop. How irresponsible.

dontsqueezetheteabag Wed 07-Aug-13 13:16:53

Thanks Star.... I actually cannot believe people on here don't think what the woman did in the first place (letting the child into the basket) was totally the wrong thing to have done and directly lead to the child being hurt.

mynameisslimshady Wed 07-Aug-13 13:19:05

When you do have kids you will make mistakes all the time, and you will hate judgy people commenting on you not being the perfect parent. The woman knows she made a mistake, why did you feel the need to stick the boot in?

Babysitting is totally different to the 24/7 of parenting so not comparable.

ImNotBloody14 Wed 07-Aug-13 13:20:28

who said what she did wasn't the wrong thing? confused

nobody here has said she was being perfectly sensible have they? they've just said you WBU to call her a fucking idiot.

KellyElly Wed 07-Aug-13 13:21:18

dontsqueezetheteabag Maybe you won't do that but chances are like any first time mum you will do something stupid and a momentary lapse of concentration will result in a bang or a bump which you will feel awful about and beat yourself up over. Maybe that's why those of us who do have children are a bit more sympathetic to this kind of thing.

WorraLiberty Wed 07-Aug-13 13:23:20

Has anyone on this thread said the woman was right to put the child in the basket OP?


The point many of us are making is that people sometimes do stupid things, then they learn from them (hopefully).

When you have kids, I can guarantee you'll be judged as a fucking idiot due to some of the mistakes you'll make.

Those people may think "fucking idiot" or they may mutter it under their breath.

They may also run home and start a thread on a parenting website, inviting others to agree that you are indeed a fucking idiot.

Meanwhile, you'll already feel like shit due to your fucking idiocy.

LRDYaDumayuShtoTiKrasiviy Wed 07-Aug-13 13:23:38

In my experience of not having kids, it is pretty easy for you and me to think 'hmm, I am well-rested, not at all knackered, haven't been worn down by constant demands all day, and in my considered opinion doing x is daft'.

So what I do is, I think 'hmm, is it possible I'd do something really stupid if I were knackered and sleep deprived'? And is it possible I would feel a right idiot once I'd done it.

If yes, give them the benefit of the doubt, judge it as a stupid thing in your own head, and move on.

It's not like she's going to do it again in a hurry.

MammaTJ Wed 07-Aug-13 13:24:31

I don't have children, however I do have expeirence of being out and about with very young kids

Ah, so you don't have experience of relentless sleepless nights, then dealing with a baby all day.

Come back and stand in judgement when you do. Until then YABU!

adeucalione Wed 07-Aug-13 13:24:51

I've made dozens of stupid parenting decisions over the years. Of course they didn't seem stupid at the time - no one would intentionally put their child in harm's way - and they've usually involved misjudging risk in some way.

Consequently I would have seen a mum who thought 'ok I give in you can ride in the basket and it will be fine if I just don't let go of the handle'. And then got distracted and let go of the handle and felt rubbish.

It's well documented that when we make mistakes ourselves it is due to a set of perfectly understandable circumstances but when someone else makes a mistake they're fucking idiots.

Fuzzysnout Wed 07-Aug-13 13:27:10

"What is TK Maxx? It sounds perfectly ghastly" limitedperiodonly I think I may just love you a little bit.

OP have you not been made aware of the unwritten MN rules which say it is a mother's right to allow their pfb to stand in any shopping trolley or basket they choose, no matter the chance of serious head injury? It comes just before the one about naice ham and after the one that states that on any post about someone's abusive, stupid or downright offensive behaviour, at least one poster must ask 'did you offer to help them?' in a smug tone. YWNBU by the way.

phantomnamechanger Wed 07-Aug-13 13:28:39

YANBU to think it, YABVU to say it, even under your breath

FrogsGoWhat Wed 07-Aug-13 13:31:08

While dealing with a very clingy whingey DD who NEVER fucking slept - I often made stupid mistakes like this.

YABU. Yes she made a mistake and her child got hurt. Although I presume you are assuming it was the mother and not eg an aunt or childminder?

DesperatelySeekingSedatives Wed 07-Aug-13 13:31:28

You sound like a fucking idiot yourself tbh.

SirChenjin Wed 07-Aug-13 13:31:36

Oh so very true Fuzzy.

higherhill Wed 07-Aug-13 13:33:40

I'm sure we've all done stupid sleep deprived stuff if we're honest. I once forgot to strap toddler into car seat and did'nt notice till we pulled up on the drive. Another time forgot to strap ( bit of a theme here) him into his buggy, so we set off down the hill near our house, he rocked backwards and forwards a few times and then catapulted himself out of buggy on to the pavement....thankfully no harm done on these occasions, he was ok and I berated myself for stupidity for ages happens.

dontsqueezetheteabag Wed 07-Aug-13 13:34:03



WeAreSeven Wed 07-Aug-13 13:34:57

Yep, the judgiest ones are the ones that don't have children themselves.
Up all night, buggy forgotten, child whinging to go in basket..........
and accident seen by Miss-I've-babysat-loads.

Pagwatch Wed 07-Aug-13 13:40:44

I mutter under my breath at times. It's not really the same as calling someone something.
I clicked onthe thread hoping for tales of a fantastic stand off, like an episode of Eastenders but even more polyester. Actually the titles should have been
Aibu to have sucked my teeth a bit.

shootfromthehip Wed 07-Aug-13 13:40:48

A deserved flaming IMO dstt- I've relented to things that I would never think possible, simply because of the sheer weight of fighting and saying no all of the time. It's not nice to have voiced your disapproval in such an ugly way: trust me, the tears and screams of that little one who have been punishment enough for the parent.

Feminine Wed 07-Aug-13 13:41:31

I have 3 and have been sleep deprived.

Still haven't put them in anything not designed for babies.

I totally understand car seats, buggies ....the child falling!

In this case , it was a preventable accident.

op I'd ask to get this thread pulled or hide it.

poppingin1 Wed 07-Aug-13 13:43:26

I saw something far worse than that once.

Was in Ikea with DH and DD in pushchair last year when we saw a family of around four adults, one teenager and one toddler in a pushchair walking onto that conveyor belt style escalator at the exit.

They had very large boxes with them on a flatbed trolley and a load of stuff had been piled onto the pushchair, as well as the adults carrying at least one blue ikea bag each.

DH is very against using the conveyor thingy when we have the pushchair so we always use the lift which is right next to.

You honestly cannot miss the lift as you pass right in front of it to get to the conveyor thingy. So we were just commenting on why the large family had chosen to use this apparatus instead (we even watched them take quite a few minutes to figure out how they were going to get on the thing) when as the pushchair loaded with stuff got halfway down, IT TIPPED! There was the most awful scream from the poor toddler and the security guard ran to use the emergency button to switch it off. We all tried to help as the buggy was quite heavy to lift back onto its wheels.
When we saw the little girl I was horrified. The left side of her face was very swollen and her eye had ballooned incredibly!

When DH and I finally got outside, they were waiting for a paramedic.

Honestly it was so awful to see, it still sends shivers down my spine when I think about it.

FrogsGoWhat Wed 07-Aug-13 13:49:19

poppingin shock

My main mistakes were things like forgetting how far she stuck out on either side when carrying her, and whacking her head against door frames. Letting her throw herself back in a tantrum while carrying her - and her whacking her head against doors etc, wheeling a shopping trolley at full tilt into one of those silly mini bollards outside the cashpoint as I just failed to see it - and she whacked her head on the handle (she was strapped in thank fuck) - that sort of thing....

HaroldLloyd Wed 07-Aug-13 13:49:25

She was about daft yes.

Muttering fucks and idiots under your breath is pretty daft too though.

You remind me of a cyclist once who dismounted to shout at me YOU STUPID FUCKING BITCH when I went the wrong way up a one Wat street after I'd noticed right away and pulled over to turn around.

It just makes a miserable situation worse.

WestieMamma Wed 07-Aug-13 13:53:21

When my daughter was little I forgot to strap her into her pushchair one time. First kerb went down and out she went into the road. I'd have been even more devasted if someone had called me a fucking idiot.

Recently I went to take the baby carseat out of the car at the supermarket and was horrified to discover that I hadn't clicked into place when I put it.

Point being, parents make mistakes all the time. Calling them fucking idiots is not helpful and makes you sound like a fucking bitch.


WestieMamma Wed 07-Aug-13 13:55:30

My previous post seems to indicate that I have lost the ability to write complete sentences.

Cravey Wed 07-Aug-13 15:16:15

I'm pretty sure she has learned he e lesson for today. Without the need for someone to judge and swear at her. Nice. Not.

SirChenjin Wed 07-Aug-13 15:18:14

Vast difference between forgetting to strap a child into a pushchair and sticking one in a pull along basket which a)is not designed for the weight of a child and b)does not have safety straps, brakes or an anti-tip mechanisam

There are genuine accidents and there is downright stupidity.

ANormalOne Wed 07-Aug-13 15:36:59

I'm pretty sure OP comes from this viral video doing the rounds on Youtube.

Guiltismymaster Wed 07-Aug-13 15:58:12

Am I worried about parents smoking around their kids? Yes
Am I worried about parents letting their kids ride in baskets? No.
I'm sure if I watched you all day you would eventually do something that wasn't 'common sense', but are you then an 'effing idiot'? Probably not. There's no need to be so aggressive.
But you're not a mum, so people won't judge you for your mistakes.

fuglychicken Wed 07-Aug-13 16:23:27

OP you sound a peach! I'm not really sure how you thought calling someone a fucking idiot (even under your breath) was going to help in this situation??

You just sound very judgemental to me. Hth

MarmaladeTwatkins Wed 07-Aug-13 16:30:53


I bet the mother was both mortified AND worried for her child. Even if she had been a bit of a div, I can't think that I'd want to make her feel even worse by calling her a fucking idiot.

YouTheCat Wed 07-Aug-13 16:33:10

I can't see why the OP is getting such a hard time. The woman was a fucking idiot to use the basket to transport her small child. It wasn't just a lapse. It was outright stupidity.

Yes, we all make mistakes. Putting a child into something not designed for their use isn't a mistake though.

Doubt I would have bothered muttering anything though.

samandi Wed 07-Aug-13 16:36:09

I was going to say YABU for using that kind of language to a stranger, but after reading the OP YADNBU. What kind of idiot puts their child in one of those baskets?

SirChenjin Wed 07-Aug-13 16:36:45

A basket is not designed to carry the weight of a 12 month old baby, it has no mechanism to stop it tipping, and it has no straps to secure a child. How anyone could think "ah, perfect place for a baby while I wheel it round and do some shopping" should be beyond anyone with half a brain cell.

samandi Wed 07-Aug-13 16:37:41

There are genuine accidents and there is downright stupidity.


HaroldLloyd Wed 07-Aug-13 16:41:37

Haven't we all done something in the heat of the moment and thought back how bloody stupid it was?

I have.

I mean yes it's a bit stupid but its not in the league of letting them tightrope on the washing line. These baskets are not exactly 10 feet high are they.

justanuthermanicmumsday Wed 07-Aug-13 16:45:11

I think it would have been better for you to kindly suggest she use a trolley for the baby's safety. If she ignored you or was rude then you could have loudly objected in a polite manner. I don't think there's a need for that sort of language. Or you could have alerted staff to advise her if you didn't want to.

I reckon she was feeling like an idiot and felt bad that the baby was hurt, we all make mistakes we're human and yes common sense can evade us sometimes

It's not like she was towing it down the M4 though is it?

Calling her a fucking idiot was nasty. I bet she felt like shit.

BrianTheMole Wed 07-Aug-13 16:46:18

Well you deserve the flaming op for the attitude. Lets hope you don't make any silly mistakes (if you ever have children) that result in your child being hurt.

zatyaballerina Wed 07-Aug-13 16:46:31

yabu, she made a mistake and I'm sure she felt bad enough without judgmental idiots swearing at her. When you have kids of your own you'll make your own mistakes (sleep deprivation with guarantee that), nobody's perfect, not least you and you'll realise that. Hopefully when you do, your dumbest moment will happen in front an ignorant, rude childless person like your current self.

I'd suggest you practice some manners, some people will respond very aggressively to being sworn at, particularly if they are very stressed, you may find yourself on the receiving end of another persons suppressed rage, don't invite that. The most respectable looking of people can turn on you and if you swear at people often enough, especially in stressful situations, it's only a matter of time before you're rude to the wrong one.

Whothefuckfarted Wed 07-Aug-13 16:50:46


I guess you've never ever lapsed for a second and let your kids hurt themselves, you must be bloody wonderful.

I would have told you to fuck the fuck off.

Whothefuckfarted Wed 07-Aug-13 16:51:41

Oh you don't have kids

That figures then. Good luck with that cos you're gonna be calling yourself a fucking idiot over and over and over..

namechangeforthispost864269 Wed 07-Aug-13 16:56:19

so you didn't really say effing idiot to her you said it to yourself about her? then came on mnet to see if you we're bu for saying that to yourself and to slate her some more for making a mistake to an even bigger audience?
you are bu for being so mean...

Catsize Wed 07-Aug-13 17:01:36

We have done it. In TK Maxx, M&S and John Lewis. Marvellous fun. As long as you don't let go of the handle. Calculated risk. Fun outweighed tiny risk. And kept child contained, amused and saved him destroying the displays.

limitedperiodonly Wed 07-Aug-13 17:06:16

Where I live people put small dogs in shopping baskets. Sounds a lot more civilised than where you are OP.

runningonwillpower Wed 07-Aug-13 17:07:00

AIBU often = judge not lest ye be judged.

limitedperiodonly Wed 07-Aug-13 17:07:20

And I truely mean that.

Feminine Wed 07-Aug-13 17:09:27

Don't parents use buggies or trollies any more?


LynetteScavo Wed 07-Aug-13 17:10:05

Well, she probably had just figured out for herself she's done something idiotic, and really didn't need anyone pointing it out to her further.

DanceParty Wed 07-Aug-13 17:17:56

appaulled eh? Discusting.

UnexpectedStepmum Wed 07-Aug-13 17:18:25

Aww I remember those "when I have children I will never let them xxx" judgements. Bless you OP.

EverybodysGoneSurfing Wed 07-Aug-13 17:28:46

Once DH and I were pushing DD around on one of those flat bed trollies in homebase and she fell off and banged her head. Yes, it was stupid, but it seemed like fun when we started it and she was loving it! We knew it was stupid as soon as she hurt herself and you swearing and judging would really not have made it any better!

Fifi2406 Wed 07-Aug-13 17:33:08

I think you're totally unreasonable! I've put my son in those before fair enough he wasn't standing at the time but things like that can happen in a split second and you never think it would happen to you at the time I'm sure your fucking idiot comment didn't make her feel any worse than she already did! Judgey mums are so bloody annoying hmm hope you've polished off your halo!

Bambi27 Wed 07-Aug-13 17:34:19

My 2 year old sits in them all the time. She loves it and keeps her happy...I don't let her stand in it but the poor women probably just didn't think for a minute...I believe the sentence you muttered under your breath would have been better said at home, whilst stood in front of the mirror. YABU

SarahAndFuck Wed 07-Aug-13 17:34:21

OP why are you asking if you were unreasonable to call her a name?

She didn't hear you, so there was no confrontation or hurt feelings, and you obviously don't feel that you were unreasonable to do so, so I'm missing the point of your thread?

ILivebytheRiver Wed 07-Aug-13 17:43:41

Whether it would have got me anywhere I don't know BUT I would have done the cowards thing and told a member of staff that someone had a child in one of their baskets. I would suggest they have a word just in case there was an accident and they got sued. Failing that I would have hovered behind the person in a state of extreme nervousness waiting to catch the child.

I'm puzzled though, who goes out with a 12 month old child without a) a pushchair, b) a car seat or c) a sling. Didn't sound like it was an impromptu shop did it?

And are we supposed to automatically sympathise with EVERY incident of crass stupidity because once we let our own child roll off the bed or shut their fingers in a door. Accidents happen sure but this was on a par with putting a baby on the handelbars of a bicycle TOO STUPID FOR WORDS!

YouTheCat Wed 07-Aug-13 17:46:05

These people are the reason for really stupid and obvious signs put up telling you not to do something.

The kind of things I look at with a confused face and wonder who the hell would do that?

Seems half of the people on this thread are the reason for these signs. hmm

Fifi2406 Wed 07-Aug-13 17:58:28

Ilivebytheriver...don't be ridiculous that's not the same thing as putting a baby on the handlebars of a bike! A bike goes at more speed than a shopping basket and the child would fall from a 3 foot height not half a foot!
the op is just being mean about a mum who probably feels like the worst mum in the world right now without anyone slagging her off wether you think it or not...when your child has an accident comments do not help the situation one bit, I tripped over once not looking where i was going holding my son and basically fell on him an dropped him on him on his head if anyone had made any comments to me I would have gone mad as I already wanted to cry with guilt!

monkeymamma Wed 07-Aug-13 18:00:32

If you had sworn at me in front of my one year old I would NOT be impressed. What a horrible way to behave.

YouTheCat Wed 07-Aug-13 18:02:17

Tripping up is an accident. What the OP described was entirely preventable had she not put her child in a pull along basket in the first place.

Lackedpunchesforever Wed 07-Aug-13 18:04:42

YANBU and it's amazing how many fucking idiots there are in charge of small children.

Cuddlydragon Wed 07-Aug-13 18:05:11

Some of these responses are deeply unpleasant OP. you're right though. She was a fucking idiot and on top of that she wasn't paying any attention. This was an entirely preventable and foreseeable accident. Poor kid but we mustn't upset mummy. FFS. Some people's priorities are seriously skewed. I'd take the advice of someone up thread and have this thread pulled.

Fifi2406 Wed 07-Aug-13 18:09:20

Yeah it was totally an accident but if I had been paying attention to where I was walking I wouldn't have tripped over an obvious trip hazard! My point is she didn't mean for her child to get injured and probably already felt shit

lovecupboards Wed 07-Aug-13 18:11:06

She was an idiot, you are a chav. The end.

Cheesyslice Wed 07-Aug-13 18:23:57


She put her child in a shopping basket, therefore she is a fucking idiot.

Cheesyslice Wed 07-Aug-13 18:26:07

grin at everyone getting arsey at your for swearing when this other woman had done worse by putting her kid in a position where she could hurt herself. Superb.

HaroldLloyd Wed 07-Aug-13 18:33:37

Oh a recent spate of perfect parents! Marvellous.

Bet none of you have ever put a foot wrong. Most accidents are preventable you know.

lovecupboards Wed 07-Aug-13 18:35:42

everyone getting arsey at your for swearing when this other woman had done worse by putting her kid in a position where she could hurt herself.

So your philosophy is that as long as somebody is behaving worse than you whatever you do is fine? You must be a lovely person.

YouTheCat Wed 07-Aug-13 18:37:14

Plenty of feet put wrong. But I have enough common sense to see when something could be dangerous and so I don't do it.

I don't understand why some people treat a trip to a shop as some kind of adventure playground for their kids? Why can't they sit in a trolley and be a bit bored? Will they combust or something? hmm

HaroldLloyd Wed 07-Aug-13 18:40:35

I bet we've all done something that could end in tears once in a while.

Last thing you need is someone muttering at you.

Anyway that point the OP was asking was if she was unreasonable to mutter you fucking idiot at the woman - which I think she was.

HaroldLloyd Wed 07-Aug-13 18:41:40

My DS could quite easily combust in a trolley BTW he gets that ragey in a shop.

That's why I shop online!

MrsDeVere Wed 07-Aug-13 18:41:41

come off it!
I am a laid back lazy parent and I tend not to get all bunchy about stuff but putting a kid in a wheel along basket??
That is just stupid.

They are not very strong, they are not very stable and kids are not very sensible.

It was an accident waiting to happen. She was an idiot.

This is not a lapse in concentration. She didn't fail to catch her child tripping, she didn't turn round suddenly and give her a clump by accident.
She put her in a shopping basket.

Even I wouldnt do that.

poppinin was that the Coventry store?

OP there was no need for swearing really. The mother would have been feeling bad as it is.

I'm surprised she managed to find one where the handle stayed put tbh, I seem to always get a dud one that keeps going back down. [sadface]

HaroldLloyd Wed 07-Aug-13 18:43:02

I think I might have done it for a little bit, if I wasn't thinking.

Letting go of the handle was unwise.

spotscotch Wed 07-Aug-13 18:47:47

I am usually hmm at the 'don't judge the woman you just saw calling her kid a little cunt while repeatedly kicking him in the head, she might just be having a bad day' types on mumsnet.

However, I do think that the situation you have described was no more than an unfortunate accident due to a lapse of judgement. Yes, letting her kid go in the basket was stupid, but people are only human and parents make dumb mistakes. When you have your first lapse of judgement (and trust me it will happen, no matter how much of a careful parent you think you will be) you will just have to hope that no one is muttering 'fucking idiot' at you, when you are panicking about your screaming g child.

Reddwarflover Wed 07-Aug-13 18:48:29

It's like when people over load the buggy with shopping and then let go of the handle = pushchair tipping over. I think thats pretty stupid too.

WhiteandGreen Wed 07-Aug-13 18:51:13


HaroldLloyd Wed 07-Aug-13 18:54:53

I've done that the first time I went shopping with a buggy.

DS thought it was hilarious.

There was no one on hand to call me a fucking idiot but I kind if knew that for myself.

Bogeyface Wed 07-Aug-13 18:56:02

OP - AIBU for swearing at this woman

MN - Yes

OP But look what she did!

MN - What she did was ill advised, but you didnt ask that, YWBU to swear at her

OP - Oh so you think what she did was ok? IANBU!

Why ask? hmm

Toomuchjiggleinmywiggle Wed 07-Aug-13 19:00:32

I have done exactly what this woman has done in the past, only at Marks and Spencer's,this thread could be about me. I am educated, I have a professional job but for whatever reason at the time I had a lapse in judgment. I was at the till,my 20 month little boy was giggling away and I was paying attention. Then I had to pay.... As soon as he fell I felt horrific and wondered what on earth I was doing . Being a mum is hard enough work without every little mistake you make being pointed out by strangers. He was fine, it was more of a fright for him than anything else. No I won't do it again and I'm sure the woman in op won't either confused

YouTheCat Wed 07-Aug-13 19:10:01

I am mourning the demise of common sense.

I do think the muttering was unnecessary though.

SirChenjin Wed 07-Aug-13 19:34:12

Boegyface - MN? Hardly! Plenty on here (myself included) who think the mother was a complete idiot for putting her child in a shopping basket.

MrsDeVere Wed 07-Aug-13 19:49:37

Dropping an overloaded buggy is different.
Until it happens to you it is not something you would necessarily think about. The buggy is made for a child to sit in.
A pull along basket is not.

In fact a lot of those things have great big stickers in them saying 'don't let your child ride in the basket'

What the mother did is not a capital offence. It was stupid though.
That doesn't make her a bad mother.
It means she did something stupid.

If you had put 'and she swore when he fell out' OP you would have 15 pages of people telling you that you should have called SS.

PrettyKitty1986 Wed 07-Aug-13 20:39:49

I was once in Tesco with the dc (2 and 4 at the time). I had just picked them up from my mums after going to the gym so I was wearing a track suit. The dc were filthy and streaked in mud from a day in the garden.

I put them both in the main part of the Trolly to be quick. I was only nipping in for a bottle of wine for df so went straight to the alcohol aisle. As I was browsing I stupidly turned away from the dc for a split second. As I turned back, ds2 was leaning far out over the side of the trolley with a bottle of wine in his hand and the trolley was just at tipping point.

I made a grab for the trolley and the wine at the same time, got the wine but couldn't stop the trolley tipping.

10 seconds later when about 5 people came running, they found me in my tracksuit flat on my back on the floor and clutching a bottle of wine, with my two filthy toddlers in a heap on the floor, screaming their heads off and the trolley on its side next to them.

I am a fucking awesome mum most of the time. One stupid incident does not change that, it just makes me human and apt to have lapses in concentration and/or judgement.

FrogsGoWhat Wed 07-Aug-13 20:53:52

Sorry PrettyKitty but the mental image I had then really had me laughing.... hope they were ok grin

PrettyKitty1986 Wed 07-Aug-13 20:59:18

I can laugh now, I wanted the ground to swallow me at the time though!

I should have added they were both fine, not a scratch on them, just got a bit of a fright!

blueshoes Wed 07-Aug-13 21:03:42

Not surprised OP has not had children ... I know the sort.

spotscotch Wed 07-Aug-13 21:18:53

prettykitty I'm really sorry, but that is hilarious!

candycoatedwaterdrops Wed 07-Aug-13 21:23:26

There are posters berating the OP for being rude by.....being rude! confused

AnnabelleLee Wed 07-Aug-13 21:37:03

Loads of us put our kids in positions where the could hurt themselves, all the fucking time, even all the perfect parents saying what a daft cow this woman was. Get fucking over it. So a kid bangs their head, so fucking what?

kali110 Wed 07-Aug-13 21:57:35

I dont think it was a lapse of concentration i think it was stupid. I feel awful for the little one. Op shouldnt have said it but i dont blame them for thinking it.
I dont understand people taking prams and pushchairs on escalators. I once saw one tip over on one :-/ it was terrible. There are signs everywhere saying use the lifts i honestly dont understand why people would take the risk.

MarmaladeTwatkins Wed 07-Aug-13 22:08:00

So I take it that all of the pious crew on here berating basket woman have NEVER caused their child a mischief through being a bit dim-witted, momentarily?

My, my. What charmed lives and exemplary parents your DC have. Let me see if I can find a medal for you... <rummages in bag>... oh look, FOUND ONE

Bogeyface Wed 07-Aug-13 22:16:37

Boegyface - MN? Hardly! Plenty on here (myself included) who think the mother was a complete idiot for putting her child in a shopping basket.

I dont think anyone is saying that she was right to do that, at best there have been suggestions of her not thinking it through to its natural conclusion, at worst, yes an idiot.

But thats not what the OP asked. She asked if SWBU to call this woman a fucking idiot and yes she was.

YouTheCat Wed 07-Aug-13 22:20:44

No, I have never caused either of my kids an injury due to being a bit dim-witted.

Ds has been to A and E once when he put his fist through a pane of glass in a door (which I thought I had replaced with plastic, but must have missed one pane - typical).

Neither of my two have been particularly wrapped in cotton wool. I must just be really lucky or have a shed load of common sense or something. hmm

Eilidhbelle Wed 07-Aug-13 22:22:15

There are so many threads on MN about people who've been out with their kids and a random stranger has come over and said something about their behaviour/clothes/appearance which has upset them. So it's quite nice to hear the random stranger's explanation of why they do what they do.

OP, YWcompletelyBU to speak to someone like that, it was totally uncalled for - and if you had said that to me, we would have had words. No way would I stand for someone being so rude.

MarmaladeTwatkins Wed 07-Aug-13 22:26:22

Why did you never teach your DS not to punch doors?


FrussoHathor Wed 07-Aug-13 22:27:06

OP I think there's a difference between being silently judgemental in your head and another to call someone a fucking idiot.
Y were BU

YouTheCat Wed 07-Aug-13 22:27:46

He was 13 at the time and is severely autistic. He was having a total meltdown.

Tbh I don't know how he managed to get to 13 without injuring himself.

AnnabelleLee Wed 07-Aug-13 22:33:41

never? I doubt that, very much. Perhaps you just blanked it out? I don't believe any parent never did something they probably shouldn't that could possibly have hurt them.

YouTheCat Wed 07-Aug-13 22:39:31


MarmaladeTwatkins Wed 07-Aug-13 22:41:18

Well then you've been lucky. Because the cleverest of women make errors of judgement/sometimes don't fully think things through. Take my SIL who was a midwife for 8 years and then a registered childminder... she has accidentally injured her own child twice. And been mortified for it afterwards.

You don't get any medals for luck, sorry.

Lora1982 Wed 07-Aug-13 22:44:42

Was this a granny shopping bag??!

YouTheCat Wed 07-Aug-13 22:46:33

Damn it! I want a medal. grin

lastnightidreamt Wed 07-Aug-13 22:47:22

youthecat wasn't changing all the panes for plastic and missing one a bit 'dim-witted'?

Where is the line drawn between an accident and a parent being 'dim-witted'?

HaroldLloyd Wed 07-Aug-13 22:48:05

Yeah you have been lucky. Everyone in the whole wide world does dim witted things on occasion. Drops something. Forgets something. Thinks oh this is a good idea, oh crapola, maybe not.

SaucyJack Wed 07-Aug-13 22:48:09

I nearly killed my then two year old by not putting the brakes on her buggy when I stopped to answer a phone call at the top of a hill leading to a busy road.

If anyone had called me a fucking idiot I would have heartily agreed.

Still, wasn't the nicest or most helpful thing you could've come out with.

YouTheCat Wed 07-Aug-13 22:48:16

The ex changed the panes. You can call him dimwitted as much as you like. I do. grin

Bogeyface Wed 07-Aug-13 22:49:36

I rather suspect that "dim witted" is the least of it eh YoutheCat? grin

AnnabelleLee Wed 07-Aug-13 22:49:52

All of my children have first shown me they could roll over by rolling off something; a couch, a bed etc.
In 13 years you have only done every thing right? lucky you.

YouTheCat Wed 07-Aug-13 22:50:26

There are many, many other adjectives I have used to describe him. wink

HaroldLloyd Wed 07-Aug-13 22:50:43

Come on You, dig deep. There must be something. You never dropped one? left them on the bed and they have fallen off? Used a bumbo on a table? Shut your babies fingers in a window?

AnnabelleLee Wed 07-Aug-13 22:52:34

I shut one childs fingers in a door. And tried to lock it. Thank fuck their bones are so soft at that age.

YouTheCat Wed 07-Aug-13 22:52:47

Nope. Can't think of anything.

The ex shut dd's fingers in the car door once. Never dropped them, even when carrying the two of them upstairs at the same time to save a trip, when they were babies.

Seems I am just really lucky. grin

HaroldLloyd Wed 07-Aug-13 22:55:30

Bloody Hell, Ive only been in this game 2.5 years and I have done all the things I mentioned. Only to DS1 though, he is my practise one. DS2 has got off lightly lucky sod.

lastnightidreamt Wed 07-Aug-13 22:56:17

Ah, well it was your ex's fault then!

Dim-wittedness explained.

YouTheCat Wed 07-Aug-13 22:57:11

I didn't get a practice one. I jumped right in the deepend with two. grin

musicismylife Wed 07-Aug-13 22:59:08

I have four kids. I have NEVER put them in a trolley because, guess what, the trolley isn't designed for the kid to piss about in. It is not a mobile play area.

It was preventable and inevitable.

Shame on her.

HaroldLloyd Wed 07-Aug-13 23:02:29

Shame on her. <snurk>

You cant put four kids in a trolley anyway, where would the cakes go?

Bogeyface Wed 07-Aug-13 23:03:11

I dont remember anything off the top of my head either, but thats because I have a shocking memory! I am sure I have displayed DW behaviour at some point!

My favourite was DWedness on the part of my friends husband and his parents. They all stood and watched my friend as she struggled to get the baby into the door bouncer thing. She asked for help and her (useless) DH said she was doing fine. Then the baby fell and bashed her head on the floor. Friend was in a state, her DH had a go at her for dropping the baby and her MIL said "Oh she'll be fine, I dropped friends DH when he was a baby a couple of times!" and friend said "OH SO YOU WERE DROPPED ON YOUR HEAD AS A BABY? THAT EXPLAINS EVERYTHING!" FIL was not happy, had a go at friend for speaking to his son like that so she had a right go at him and said that if he hadnt been so fucking useless then perhaps MIL wouldnt have dropped the baby either, like father like son!

Funnily enough, her FIL who is known as a bully and a bastard was sweetness and light to her from then on grin

Bogeyface Wed 07-Aug-13 23:04:19

You cant put four kids in a trolley anyway

You can you know. Two in the twin seats, one in the actual trolley and one trolley surfing on the end wink

Bogeyface Wed 07-Aug-13 23:04:51

I think I have just remembered my DW moment, although no accidents occurred I am sure that is more by luck than judgement!

Xmasbaby11 Wed 07-Aug-13 23:05:00

Poor baby! I would have been upset to see that. It was really careless of her, but I wouldn't have got angry as there's no point.

YouTheCat Wed 07-Aug-13 23:05:17

Mmm cakes.

Bogey, good for your friend. grin

Bogeyface Wed 07-Aug-13 23:06:38

She is known for being gobby, but I think that was the first time she told her FIL to fuck off! This was years ago, said baby is now in her twenties and doing just fine!

AnnabelleLee Wed 07-Aug-13 23:10:35

Shame on her ?
Get the fuck over yourself!

poppingin1 Wed 07-Aug-13 23:21:46

Frogs that pretty much sums up what my face did at the time too.

Ferret no it was the Edmonton store.

Personally I don't like putting LO's in anything that isn't actually for the purpose of ferrying them around, but I try not to judge. DH does put DD in the front part of large trolleys at the supermarket but I just take her out and pop her in the toddler seat. The Ikea incident was just obviously very silly and an accident waiting to happen. The lifts were taking a little long so DH and I think they just didn't want to wait.

IRT the OP, parenting is hard and can be exhausting. Sometimes shit happens.

PrettyKitty1986 Thu 08-Aug-13 03:15:18

So some people have never made a mistake, error of judgement or had a preventable accident with their dc?

Mmhmm, Kay grin

ll31 Thu 08-Aug-13 06:44:54

You sound nasty op. So a baby falls, and your reaction is to mutter curses at the mother. Lovely behaviour.

MortifiedAdams Thu 08-Aug-13 07:00:51

If seen a woman wheeling around a toddler in one of these baskets and it was very sweet. Never considered it to be dangerous confused

Also... buggies tip.over from.too many shopping bags with dcs in - do you call those women fucking idiots?

Reddwarflover Thu 08-Aug-13 07:22:17

A little bit of common sense goes a long way.
I like the idea of putting a little dog in one of those baskets though (hmmm wonder if my King Charles spaniel will fit in my nan's one)

Going back to tipping buggies and errant baskets, I have 3 dc's and not once did I overload the buggies with shopping and make them tip. I have seen lots of parents do it and always think 'how did you not realise that would happen, it is kinda obvious' .
As for the 12 mth old in a basket, pretty stupid thing to do, even in an emergency a basket is no place to put your previous baby, and now we all know why.
Sure it was a shock enough though when the child was nearly knocked out without a snide comment on top.

Fraggle3112 Thu 08-Aug-13 07:30:52

18 months ago I would have thought the same although I wouldn't have muttered it.

Fast forward to now and I have a gorgeous 7mo who is yet to sleep through who has: almost had a large glass bottle dropped on him, fell off a bed, banged his head on door frames etc etc.

I'm not a fucking idiot I'm shattered and I'm learning to do something I've never done before and now DS is crawling he's a mini menace who LOOKS for trouble thankfully baby's are resiliant but when they hurt them selves especially because you've done something stupid you feel like shit and a nasty under the breath comment from a snooty cow in TKMaxx is the last thing you need. YWVU

Reddwarflover Thu 08-Aug-13 07:47:56

Why would a snotty cow be in tkmaxx? Surely she would be in m&s muttering obscenities under her breath at the stupidly dangerous oaps? ;)

FrussoHathor Thu 08-Aug-13 08:31:10

Nah redd she wouldn't be able to get cheap last seasons fashions in m&s

honeytea Thu 08-Aug-13 08:54:45

I use pull along baskets to pull ds around shops, he loves it. I never let go of the handle.

You were rude and unkind. I don't think anyone should judge other people's parenting especially childless people.

Wuxiapian Thu 08-Aug-13 08:55:04


It was an accident and I'm sure she felt worse about it than you, OP.

We all make mistakes and accidents happen - don't be so Judgey/holier-than-thou!

Bogeyface Thu 08-Aug-13 09:05:35

Just realised that I have had the overloaded buggy fall over. Was back in the days when I was a single mum to DD and DS and could only get into town once a week as it cost a fortune in travel. DS is disabled so couldnt walk the 3 miles there and back. I used to have to get a weeks worth of shopping for the three of us and get the bus back. Not ideal but you know, you do what you have to and do your best. Sometimes your best aint perfect but I have learned over the years to not sweat the small stuff.

Bogeyface Thu 08-Aug-13 09:06:59

Honeytea I have to admit that whilst I do think the OP WBU, I think you are too for putting your child in the basket. If I am putting new clothes in there that I want to buy, I dont want whatever muck was on the bottom of your childs shoes to get on them thanks!

Reddwarflover Thu 08-Aug-13 09:29:17

Yuck last seasons fashion [horrified look]
That's where she is going wrong then Frusso!
Needs to stop sticking her nose in other people's business and start shopping somewhere decent lol ;)

honeytea Thu 08-Aug-13 09:30:14

Bogey my child is 7 months old so doesn't wear shoes.

poppingin1 Thu 08-Aug-13 15:07:49

Well I dropped DD once when she was 6 months old. Its was actually like when you fumble a ball and try to keep a hold of it and it keeps bouncing out of your hands.

I was very distraught but my friends just told me not to worry about it. Luckily she fell on a nice thick rug. I should have seen it as a sign of things to come though.

Nowhere near as funny as PrettyKitty's story though.

zippey Thu 08-Aug-13 17:58:45

I may have done this as well, but can't remember. Never had any serious injuries. Toddlers injure themselves all the times, part of learning and growing up. I also think its quite sweet and funny if I see people in the shops doing this. I probably do other things that people wouldn't approve ie chase toddler round shop ailes etc.

I think you were being unreasonable to be judgy.

Thepowerof3 Thu 08-Aug-13 18:39:08

Touché honeytea! You just made me snort. My buggy was overweighted and tipped backwards recently DS was unscathed so that's all I'm bothered about

Bogeyface Thu 08-Aug-13 18:56:32

At 7 months that is even more ridiculous and dangerous! Have you not heard of prams?

I can understand someone giving in to a whinging toddler for a quiet life and not thinking through the consequences but a 7 month old?! Hardly pester power!

But hey, as long as its "cute" hmm

honeytea Thu 08-Aug-13 19:19:24

I am an overly cautious mum and I just can't see how ds would get hurt sitting in a basket. The ones at our local shop are very tall so you just see eyes peeping out over the top, I hold onto it the entire time.

There are lots of things I think are dangerous like going in the car, I make every effort to keep ds safe in actually dangerous situations but sitting in a ground level basket is not in my opinion dangerous.

I live in a country where children are kept rear facing in car seats till the age of 4/5 but they are pulled around in sledges without straps holding the in from being babies(which I imagine is a similar risk level if not more dangerous than being pulled around a shop in a basket) I have never ever heard of a child being seriously injured ( or injured at all) falling from a sledge.

WhiteandGreen Thu 08-Aug-13 19:38:52

What sort of person goes through life tutting about 'accidents waiting to happen'.

FrussoHathor Thu 08-Aug-13 19:40:16

What sort of person goes through life tutting about 'accidents waiting to happen'.
Someone who was born to be a health and safety officer. grin

Bogeyface Thu 08-Aug-13 19:47:42

It comes down to the fact that baskets are for putting shopping in and prams are for putting babies in. Call me old fashioned but I prefer to use things for their intended purpose. I daresay it wont be your fault if your baby gets hurt.......

honeytea Thu 08-Aug-13 19:58:43

If my baby got hurt falling out of a basket it would be my fault, if my baby got hurt falling out of a pram or being involved in a pram tipping incident it would be my fault.

Maybe I should keep ds safely wrapped in cotton wool at home.

FrussoHathor Thu 08-Aug-13 20:01:01

What happens if DC has hurt themself falling out of a buggy but not fallen out of a trolley. Does that not make the trolley safer to sit them in.

BrianTheMole Thu 08-Aug-13 20:05:45

We had a shopping basket left behind in a holiday apartment we stayed at. The kids had a whale of a time pushing each other up and down in it.

YouTheCat Thu 08-Aug-13 20:16:37

Surely a baby/child in a buggy would be strapped in?

FrussoHathor Thu 08-Aug-13 21:18:39

Presumably youthecat you don't have double jointed Houdini children? Multiple straps cant hold them.

YouTheCat Thu 08-Aug-13 21:21:53

I did have. Ds decided against the double buggy at 2.5 and would just undo the straps. But I'd assume a baby wouldn't be able to do that.

After the buggy was rendered useless, I invested in reins (and I don't care how un pc reins are considered, they kept him safe).

FrussoHathor Thu 08-Aug-13 22:35:37

Dd1 could get out of her buggy at 1. Wriggling rather than undoing. But she could walk so switched to wrist strap.

dd2 has hypermobility and SNs and can get out of anything, including buggys, reins, Houdini seatbelt clasps, a 7 point harness, double locked doors shes a runner in seconds when she wants to. (Except locked houses, that takes a minute or two, --the time it takes to go for a wee--)

ravenAK Thu 08-Aug-13 22:43:24

She certainly was a fucking idiot.

Was the situation helped by you calling her one?

Possibly not.

Most parents have done something fucking idiotic at some point. Goes with the territory.

YouTheCat Thu 08-Aug-13 22:50:41

I totally understand that kind of thing, Frusso. They have a special seat belt for ds when he goes out on the minibus these days. It can only be released by a device (that ds doesn't have).

PeriodMath Thu 08-Aug-13 22:55:20

YABU to have sworn at a stranger. Shame your instinct wasn't to help the child rather than verbally abuse the mother.

Parmarella Thu 08-Aug-13 23:01:18

Op not coming out looking well...

Poor Sis once had pram not come through at airport and had to walk with handluggage, toddler and baby to passport control. She ended up putting baby on luggage trolley but he fell out and had a cut and was bleeding.

The thing that shocked her most, apart from her own moment of stupidity was that NOBODY helped her, though some people tutted.

Tutters and people like OP are dreadfully devoid of human compassion IMO

mynameismskane Thu 08-Aug-13 23:09:59

Welcome to mumsnet op! Yep, putting the child in a basket like that was pretty stupid.

But whoa, don't come on here flaming people for that, or for the following
Using formula
Smoking whilst pregnant
Drugs whilst pregnant
Smoking over a pram
Giving coca cola to a baby/toddler

If you judgey these it will be YOU who gets flamed! And that's how mumsnet rolls...!

Bogeyface Thu 08-Aug-13 23:30:29

Maybe I should keep ds safely wrapped in cotton wool at home.

Or just dont do bloody stupid things with him.

PeriodMath Thu 08-Aug-13 23:31:08

mskane, it's not the judging that bothers me - it's the foul aggressive language towards a stranger.

FrussoHathor Thu 08-Aug-13 23:45:01

I need one of those youthecat dd2 lulls people into a false sense of security by sitting nicely, until you hit a road where you can't stop and appearing in the seat next to you.

honeytea Fri 09-Aug-13 08:15:32

"Or just dont do bloody stupid things with him"

I keep my child as safe as I possibly can if he is at risk of injury or death. If somehow ds managed to fall out of the basket the worst that would happen is he would bump his head. Ds has just started pulling himself up on the furniture and he often falls over, I posted a thread the other day asking if I should get him a soft padded helmet to protect his little head and everyone who replied said oh no it's not a long way to fall, babies bump their head all the time, don't be so precious, I am confident that ds wont fall out of the basket but if he didhe wouldn't get any more hurt than if he fell over whilst holding onto the coffee table.

I have been involved in a pram tipping incident ( my little sister was 18 months old and I was 18) she wiggled her way out of the straps whilst I was paying for shopping and she clI'm
ed up the back of the pram, I didn't see as I was paying, the whole thing tipped over, she landed on the floor with a bump, she was ok but it was a horrible experience for both of of. Because of that we have a parent facing pram so I can see ds at all times and I tighten his straps every time I put him in the pram.

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