To take neighbours washing down

(171 Posts)
FrussoHathor Sat 27-Jul-13 15:02:00

Just took my washing in as clouds looked threatening. Got mine in and the heavens opened.

Neighbours have washing out. And gone out for day.

I have access to their garden (fire escape route) so I took their washing down, into one of my tubs, and pinned a large bag over the top and left by their door.

Is this acceptable? It is tipping it down out there now.

Would you be annoyed if it was your washing? We're not really on speaking terms. confused

Sirzy Sat 27-Jul-13 15:03:58

Personally I would be grateful if my neighbours did that but we get on well.

Maggietess Sat 27-Jul-13 15:05:14

Sounds very kind of you to me!

OddBoots Sat 27-Jul-13 15:05:27

It's already wet now, I'd leave it.

chocoluvva Sat 27-Jul-13 15:06:29

What a lovely thing to do. The house next door to me is up for rent - would you be interested?

OddBoots Sat 27-Jul-13 15:06:59

Oh, I see you've already done it, sorry, I didn't read right, if you got in before the downpour then I'd be very grateful in their shoes.

LazyMonkeyButler Sat 27-Jul-13 15:09:54

If my neighbours did this then I'd be happy - but then we get on well & I would have no problem with them being in my garden whilst I was out.

However, if my previous neighbour had done the same - horrible man who never spoke unless it was to complain about something or other (always minor), and liked to stand in his bedroom window with binoculars watching my DC "getting up to no good" (i.e. playing) then no. No, I would have been pissed off that he was sticking his nose in my business again.

So hard to judge what they'll think really!

RoadToTuapeka Sat 27-Jul-13 15:09:55

I think that sounds kind! Did you leave a note? They might get home and be a bit puzzled but hopefully grateful. If no note (or unless you pop over when you see them) they might be slightly anxious about who was in their garden though.

SuperiorCat Sat 27-Jul-13 15:12:49

You sound lovely OP. But not sure I would want someone touching my knickers.

AnnabelleLee Sat 27-Jul-13 15:13:03

I would have been happy in my last house where I knew all my neighbours, I'd be a bit weirded out in my newer house where I don't.
I think I'd be being unreasonable as its the same gesture with the same intent, but I wouldn't be very happy in the second instance. I'd say thank you and smile though.

pixwix Sat 27-Jul-13 15:14:46

That sounds lovely - I do it for my neighbours and vice versa. When you say you aren't on speaking terms - does this mean you just haven't had chance to get to know each other yet?

Pickle131 Sat 27-Jul-13 15:18:18

If this happened to me I'd think that it was very kind of someone. I'd maybe feel there was now some kind of obligation on me, but be happy I had nice neighbours. If the person left a note saying "I hope I did the right thing but I saw your washing was about to get soaked" I'd feel less concerned that I had an interfering neighbour. If I'd had underwear on the line I'd think they had overstepped a bit.
I bet you're standing by the window wondering whether to put it back on the line and panicking you'd get it back in the wrong order wink

youarewinning Sat 27-Jul-13 15:19:30

Id be extremely grateful. Probably get you a bottle of wine. Nothing worse than being caught in a downpour if on a day out and then coming home to have to sort out soggy washing.

FrussoHathor Sat 27-Jul-13 15:22:00

They've live there for a couple of years, normal family. we just don't talk more than saying hi.

Didn't touch knickers. <eeew> Just unclipped pegs and caught it all in basket. Was mostly work uniform.

I'm just hoping the black bag trick works or it'll just be a soggy mess when they find it, and that won't have been helpful at all.

Joanne279 Sat 27-Jul-13 15:24:00

I wish you were my neighbour. Very kind of you x

FrussoHathor Sat 27-Jul-13 15:25:05

Will leave a note like pickle said. I'd never get it in the right order if I put it back wink

TidyDancer Sat 27-Jul-13 15:25:46

Oh that is very kind of you, and I would've been very grateful if someone did this for me. smile

deleted203 Sat 27-Jul-13 15:27:51

I'd be very grateful! It was a kind thing to do.

GibberTheMonkey Sat 27-Jul-13 15:29:58

Always nice to hear stories of kind
and considerate neighbours as a balance

deepfriedsage Sat 27-Jul-13 15:31:58

I wouldn't be grateful to have a stack of ironing if you just chucked it all in a crate to crease up. I would rather it be left till it dried so I could fold it, thus avoiding ironing. I would appreciate your kind thoughts, just wish you left it alone rather than give me an unpleasant task of ironin , I would not need to have done otherwise.

FrussoHathor Sat 27-Jul-13 15:36:51

deepfried it's stuff that they would iron anyway. I contemplated folding it, but that would have involved touching it more than would be comfortable. plus it was seriously starting to hammer down

AudrinaAdare Sat 27-Jul-13 15:38:20

Go for it. Mine have just soaked my almost dry washing by sitting and watching their children in the pool fire the hose over the fence angry I had my laptop out there earlier. That would have been an interesting conversation.

They are about to light their BBQ. I don't think any of them have looked at the forecast and it's already clouding over. Good.

LifeIsSoDifferent Sat 27-Jul-13 15:38:40

I'd be grateful

AudrinaAdare Sat 27-Jul-13 15:39:06

Oops, didn't RTFT. Well done smile

FrussoHathor Sat 27-Jul-13 15:43:09

audrina can't believe someone would let their kids soak the neighbours washing. shock

ZillionChocolate Sat 27-Jul-13 15:44:02

I think it was kind. If they think it's overstepping the mark, then they can say "thanks, but no need in future, just let it get wet".

I'd be grateful. I wouldn't dry kinky sex gear out in the garden (or in the house, I don't have any to dry), I could handle neighbours briefly handling my clean briefs.

I'd think it was a very nice thing to do even if it meant I had to iron it all! You sound a bit grumpy deepfried sad

FrussoHathor Sat 27-Jul-13 15:49:30

Zillion I think I'd draw the line before kinky sex gear - I'd have let that get rained on. Eeeww.

Have left note.

Doingthedo Sat 27-Jul-13 15:50:57

yy about the ironing, it must be folded immediately, what if they are against ironing, like me???!!! I do not iron anything

Yonihadtoask Sat 27-Jul-13 15:51:30

I would thank you.

My previous neighbour used to take mine in . He ironed it on more than one occasion too!_

Steamedcabbage Sat 27-Jul-13 15:51:45

A neighbour used to do this for my parents if they were out for the day and he wanted to have a bonfire and they were always very grateful ...

Doingthedo Sat 27-Jul-13 15:52:02

but very thoughtful otherwise!

FruOla Sat 27-Jul-13 15:58:36

I think that's really kind of you smile

deepfriedsage Sat 27-Jul-13 16:00:52

I don't like ironing, it sublax's my wrist, hurts my back and exacerbates dysautonomia symptoms. I buy clothes that rarely need ironing and fold carefully once dry, to avoid ironing. Hence why I would not want my washing chucked in a crate all creased up.

FrussoHathor Sat 27-Jul-13 16:05:14

If I'd have folded it it would have been soaked through and pointless to take it down.
Its definitely items that would be ironed to within an inch of their life anyway.

yoni I draw the line at ironing it for them I'm afraid What if he ironed pants too?

If your own washing got soaked would you wash it again, or just leave it out til it dried? Just wondered what other people do..

curlew Sat 27-Jul-13 16:07:51

Yes of course. Mumsnet will tell you that it's a gross invasion of privacy, but it's not!

deepfriedsage Sat 27-Jul-13 16:08:39

It stays on the line till it is dry. I dry inside on an surer, if there is risk of rain.

deepfriedsage Sat 27-Jul-13 16:09:40

* airer *

Tittypulumpcious Sat 27-Jul-13 16:10:59

That's a lovely thing to do, can you be my neighbour too!

digerd Sat 27-Jul-13 16:11:23

I don't hang mine out. I have a lean to/utility and is boiling in there in summer.
I think it was very thoughtful of you but I also don't iron and hang mine up immediately to dry which they do without wrinkles.
Anything that does need ironing gets chucked out for the charity shops.

Where are you that it's pouring down?

OrangeLily Sat 27-Jul-13 16:13:41

I would be grateful and touched that you had gone to the trouble. I'd you had creased them beyond repair I would just wash them again! The world would not end grin

Although I've seen a similar thread on here where everyone told the OP that she was bonkers, that it was a huge invasion of privacy and that they couldn't bare their neighbours touching their knickers (some on that thread didn't even put their knickers outside because God forbid the neighbours realised that they wore undies hmm).

AudrinaAdare Sat 27-Jul-13 16:16:11

FrussoHathor they are all hammered as are the guests. They are determined to enjoy themselves and are now sitting out in the rain shouting and playing jungle music.

unlucky83 Sat 27-Jul-13 16:23:43

It was a kind thing to do - no one would think badly of you for doing it - even if it made them feel a bit uncomfortable...just think how would you feel if someone did it for you?
I do know how you feel now- when my old neighbour was away for a month and their gutter was overflowing so badly I thought it would come off the wall -after dithering for ages I took my ladder round to see if I could unblock it easily for them... but felt a bit awkward for it ...
We didn't take in each others washing - but did knock at the door to say it was raining...
(Neighbour on other side another matter ...but then they wouldn't do anything that wasn't in their interest)
Bit of an advertising pitch (although their website seems to be inactive) - if you have a rotary line dryer -you need to get a Rotamate -or one of the other makes (were more expensive) - a rain cover...love mine ... if it really chucks down it might get a wee bit damp and need 10 mins in tumble dryer rather than spinning again...

RatUpADrainpipe Sat 27-Jul-13 16:27:28

they might be slightly anxious about who was in their garden though.

Well, if someone came in and took my washing down in a thunderstorm, put it in a basket and covered it up, I wouldn't actually give a hell who they were!!

RatUpADrainpipe Sat 27-Jul-13 16:29:39

they couldn't bare their neighbours touching their knickers*

Hee hee - talk about a Freudian Slip !

RoseFlowerFairy Sat 27-Jul-13 16:31:52

What do you ladies do if you have stains that do not come out from your period, in your knickers? Do you put those knickers out on the line?

FrussoHathor Sat 27-Jul-13 17:11:24

rose those ones go through the tumble drier

MadBusLady Sat 27-Jul-13 17:14:57

I would think you were very nice and meant well BUT it would slightly weird me out and make me feel like (a) you are generally watching my stuff and (b) I am obliged to watch your stuff and do you similar favours. Sorry. Just like my privacy (and really not bothered about having to dry washing twice). And before anyone tells me to go and live in a detached house in the middle of a National Park - I would if I could.

Lizzabadger Sat 27-Jul-13 17:20:36

I would think it was kind and well-meant but it would weird me out having my neighbour touching my underwear. Unless we were on very close terms I would rather my washing was left to get wet - sorry.

PuppyMonkey Sat 27-Jul-13 17:27:24

Crikey if you're that particular about your precious knickers and who sees and touches them, don't hang them out on the line in full view of everyone. hmm

As for ironing, the clothes would probably get ruined in the rain anyway, so who cares about the "not being folded up correctly" problem.

Chill out people

JackNoneReacher Sat 27-Jul-13 17:28:37

You could be the creepy neighbourhood weirdo for all we know. Perhaps that's why they don't speak to you. Id rather you didn't thanks.

MadBusLady Sat 27-Jul-13 17:41:29

Who said anything about knickers? It's the idea of people looking into my garden and taking decisions about my stuff. I'm not that comfortable with it, bite me.

MadBusLady Sat 27-Jul-13 17:44:05

Oh ok Lizzabadger did. blush Well, I'm not fussed about the knickers bit per se, but it comes to the same thing really. We all have different boundaries and this is - pay close attention, here - not wrong.

FrussoHathor Sat 27-Jul-13 18:02:28

Ooh I'm actually pretty intrigued that i could be the neighbourhood weirdo. grin

MrsWolowitz Sat 27-Jul-13 18:12:53

What a kind thing you did.

footphobic Sat 27-Jul-13 18:22:32

When I was growing up everyone would do this for each other where we lived, it was normal, expected even. Not so much these days, but still a nice thing to do.

I wouldn't worry about the ironing aspect of it.

I didn't know there were people who didn't iron until I joined MN, but then I was brought up by my grandparents and my gm ironed everything...pants, socks, tea towels!

HotCrossPun Sat 27-Jul-13 18:29:24

deepfried You would leave washing that has been soaked by the rain to dry out so you could fold it and put it away confused

It was a nice thing you did OP, some people overthink things way too much.

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sat 27-Jul-13 18:36:30

We always did this when I was a child - if it rained, slack Alice over the cut would have everyone's washing in in a trice. She could do four houses in three minutes!

I was tempted to do this for my neighbours the other day whilst bringing mine in and getting soaked at the same time, but didn't for the reasons outlined already.

I don't think I'd appreciate it in reverse, we don't talk at all.

Wibblypiglikesbananas Sat 27-Jul-13 18:42:00

Where I grew up, all the neighbours used to do this for one another. I think it's nice.

OrangeLily Sat 27-Jul-13 18:49:17

I don't have any stained pants at all, despite many leakages over the years. Always soak in salted water before wash to get out.

revealall Sat 27-Jul-13 19:05:27

I would absolutely hate this for many reasons.

1) Going into my garden
2) Touching my things
3) Someone seeing my grotty knickers
4) Feeling I owed them a favour
5) Not knowing who did it (you left a note but you aren't a friend).

I would only do it for someone (which I did the other day) if I knew the person well enough to know they wouldn't mind. Sorry - a kind thought but I would be livid.

revealall Sat 27-Jul-13 19:06:15

OrangeLily - doesn't salt set colour?

apostropheuse Sat 27-Jul-13 19:13:42

salt removes blood stains actually.
Milk removes ink stains.

...and I'm a boring person. smile

revealall Sat 27-Jul-13 19:39:48

My mother told me that too but in my experience it didn't work. How much salt do you need? Is it just a bleaching action?

Jux Sat 27-Jul-13 19:43:17

Oooh apostropheuse, does that include ink from a leaky biro which covered a tape measure in leaky goo which was then used to measure dd's waist which left sticky goo biro leak on her school summer polo shirt which then got soaked and scrubbed in Vanish for some time and then put in the wash but didn't come out?

If it does, then you will have become my new hero grin

Samu2 Sat 27-Jul-13 19:49:45

I wouldn't like it. I like my privacy and don't want anyone in my garden without my permission. However, I would take it in the spirit it was intended and thank them.

BackforGood Sat 27-Jul-13 20:00:51

I would be extremely appreciative but I have seen other threads on here where some loony MNers have got very uptight about it. Still, there's nowt so queer as folk, as they say.

inneedofrain Sat 27-Jul-13 20:03:26

Many years ago, someone did this when we were on holiday. All the washing including the big heavy beach towels where on a line on the Balacony we had gone out for the day in our hire car (hence the reason the big heavy beach towels where being washed) it hacked it down. Flooded the roads out, the resturant we were staying above out. distroyed peoples houses, some roads where inpassable for a week or more etc.

The Mum in the appartment next door (also on holiday) climbed over onto out balcony (a good 15 foot drop if she had fallen) took all the washing down folded neatly and put the blind down to prevent it from getting wet (couldn´t get in as we were out and the doors off of the balcony were locked)

We were incredibly grateful when we got back! It was a very kind thing which saved us alot of work as there was no washing machine, so the beach towels had been rinsed in the bath etc.

As a beside the point, we later that evening wondered down to the resturant to each to find the waiters, owner etc heart broken as it was flooded, the chairs tables etc soaked. In typical style for us we rolled up our torusers kicked our shoes off (about 2 foots of water on the outside patio)and got mops, brooms, buckets, cloths and said "we english rain we understand"! and cleaned the resturant for them, once they realised that we were not going to quit they joined in, took 8 people a total of 1 hour to have them back open. It was the only resturant open for the next three days! They were incredibly grateful and couldn´t believe that we would just "help"!

You did the right thing!

eurozammo Sat 27-Jul-13 20:08:53

How would rain ruin clothes? It's only water. Like, um, the stuff the clothes were just washed in...

MikeOxard Sat 27-Jul-13 20:20:29

How lovely of you, I'd be really grateful.

Bumblebee333 Sat 27-Jul-13 20:20:44

I would appreciate it. its a kibd and thoughtful thing to do.

I would never hang my knickers outside on a washing line unless I had no neighbours.

2rebecca Sat 27-Jul-13 20:58:09

I think it sounds a nice thing to do

Maggietess Sat 27-Jul-13 21:02:04

revealall you'd be livid??? About someone doing a kind thing for you??? Some of the responses here astound me. And the OP clearly didn't do it so someone "owed her" she did it to be nice.

Gosh is it any wonder people don't talk to their neighbours anymore if you have to worry about being so judged from being kind never mind if you actually did something that could be wrong.

We've got a lovely relaxed relationship with all out neighbours, they've taken in parcels, we've brought in bins, kept an eye when they were on holiday, called them when their alarm went off one day, they've let us know about loose tiles, we've jointly arranged for trees/shrubs facing our houses to be tidied up. It's just win win all around to have a nice relationship with your neighbours, makes life so much easier!

I'm really really shocked that this could be viewed in any other way than nice.

ClothesPegs Sat 27-Jul-13 21:23:29

Lovely thing to do, you sound like a great neighbour!

mmmuffins Sat 27-Jul-13 21:28:53

While I understand how a lot of people would think this is a nice thing, I would be really upset to find you'd done this.

I don't want you in my private space, I didn't invite you. I don't want you touching my clothes. I don't mind if they get rained on, and as I don't own an iron I certainly don't want the clothes left in a heap.

Mainly I would feel very creeped out. Some of us really value our privacy, and to have someone invade it is quite upsetting.

CeliaLytton Sat 27-Jul-13 21:33:05

YWNBU, you were being very kind and thoughtful. Personally though I would hate anyone letting themselves into my garden and though I would appreciate the gesture I would not want you to do it again.

I am totally uptight though and have been scarred by many weirdo neighbours!

mawbroon Sat 27-Jul-13 21:40:59

Where I live, there are lots of families in the street and the kids play together often and we are popping in and out of each others houses for cups of tea all the time. Some of us have keys for neighbours houses too in case there are any problems.

Taking in the washing for each other is a regular occurrence too. I just can't imagine living somewhere are not knowing the neighbours!! And, it's not like we live in the back of beyond, this is in a city street!

llittleyello Sat 27-Jul-13 21:41:43

I would be pissed off.

FrussoHathor Sat 27-Jul-13 21:57:26

I'm quite worried now that the neighbours might think I want something in return. confused
I simply thought that had they known it was going to rain they wouldn't have put it out. They don't usually I'm not a stalker neighbour honest, I just spent a lot of time in the garden with the dcs, and it's quite a low fence

inneed that was nice. I don't think I'd risk a 15ft drop though.

Interesting views brought up though. Maybe i acted rashly; I didn't think too much about their reaction, and that they might feel put out by it. blush

ouryve Sat 27-Jul-13 22:00:56

I think that what you did was lovely. Don't worry about it flowers

revealall Sat 27-Jul-13 22:02:26

Maggietess yes livid.

And the OP clearly didn't do it so someone "owed her" she did it to be nice. ....er but as she isn't friendly with the neighbours (not on speaking terms) they could read anything in to it. I know people who just love to be "needed" and would love to do people a favour even if not required.

And please don't assume that people not friendly with my neighbours because they don't want people entering their property when they aren't there. I also don't want my neighbours cutting my grass without me asking or painting my fence even though this would also be a nice (and necessary)thing to do.

Where I live we all take in parcels for each other, have drinks in the garden on summer nights and discuss clearing communal weeds etc.Just don't touch my personal things without asking. Thank You.

revealall Sat 27-Jul-13 22:04:16

Sorry -and please don't assume that people are not friendly with their neighbours because they don't want people entering their property when they aren't there.

DifferentNow Sat 27-Jul-13 22:05:35

I have OCD and I would hate it.

Meglet Sat 27-Jul-13 22:06:37

It's a nice gesture but I'd be really annoyed. All the clothes would be crumpled up and I'd have to wash them again to get the creases out, I never iron - ever. The washing line does the de-creasing for me.

My washing stays out in the rain, snow, overnight.

MadBusLady Sat 27-Jul-13 22:10:11

I think the majority of posters have said they'd appreciate it OP, and those of us who wouldn't have mostly said we would know you meant it nicely, so your odds are good. smile

miffybun73 Sat 27-Jul-13 22:12:57

I agree with mmmuffins.

Though it was a kind gesture done with the best of intentions I would be really upset by it and feel it to be a major invasion of privacy.

PicardyThird Sat 27-Jul-13 22:13:06

Tbvh I would have preferred you to have left it... but I would have very much appreciated the kind thought and thanked you effusively when I saw you next.

Goooooooooooooooooooooood Sat 27-Jul-13 22:14:49

I would be pleased if you did this for me. I have lovely nieghbours - we would do this type of thing for each other.

starjules Sat 27-Jul-13 22:20:34

I would and do think its lovely, my neighbours do that ( and we for them) just a nice neighbourly thing to do. My neighbours now all have keys to each others houses and if they are away etc do pet sitting, plant watering etc. When the neighbours have been away we have got shopping in for them. Just being nice and looking out for each other.

FrussoHathor Sat 27-Jul-13 22:24:52

revealall by not on speaking terms I meant I don't hang over the fence nattering to them, or pop in for tea. Not that I've never spoken to them ever.

However I have said that perhaps I was too hasty in my actions to fully think about how they'd feel. It honestly didn't cross my mind that they'd feel their privacy had been invaded. Although I do now accept that I may have overstepped the line.

PolkadotsAndMoonbeams Sat 27-Jul-13 22:26:45

I wouldn't like it if you hadn't left a note (wondering who'd been in my garden, wanting to thank them etc.) but since you have, I'd be really pleased.

I hate it if I've left washing out and it starts raining when I'm out. But I iron, so I don't mind chucking everything into a basket to bring it in. I'd rather that that have to dry it for about three times as long!

So I don't think YABU at all (I would be if I did it, because I'd have to scramble over the fence which I think would be too much of an invasion of privacy and too hard work ).

revealall Sat 27-Jul-13 22:36:40

FrussoHathor- yes I worked that out as you wouldn't (possibly) care about the washing of complete strangers.
However you aren't friendly enough to know if they would object or not. I would thank you but would probably add - "I really don't mind if it's left out" or something. I wouldn't have the words to say "keep the fuck out of my garden". My garden is tiny so to me it feels like the entrance to my living room rather than "outside".

What did your note say by the way?

SecondStarToTheRight Sat 27-Jul-13 22:36:46

Personally, I would have done the same thing (and thanked you if you had done it for me).

Next time you see them ask if it was ok or if they would prefer you to leave it next time.

Whatever they feel, no major harm will have been done.

curlew Sat 27-Jul-13 23:32:02

I consider myself to be quite an empathetic person- but I just cannot even begin to understand why anyone would mind this.

curlew Sat 27-Jul-13 23:36:00

And I would actually go so far as to say that the <hesitates- then decides to jump> normal reaction is on the not minding to delighted side of the curve- and the not minding to being livid side is a bit odd.

MadBusLady Sat 27-Jul-13 23:44:58

Then evidently you need to consider the possibility that you are wrong about your powers of empathy, curlew.

I'm quite taken aback that so many people are taken aback that people might have different views, needs and priorities to them. To my mind, neighbourliness is as much about being easy-going about difference as it is about the Pleasantville-esque utopia some people seem so committed to.

The OCD thing is actually a very good example of how someone's kind thought might be totally inappropriate for someone else's needs. Why not take half a minute to consider how your actions, even if they suit the majority, might not suit some people who are not you? You still might decide to do the thing, of course, it depends on your knowledge of the situation.

MadBusLady Sat 27-Jul-13 23:48:03

X-post, and quite a fitting one really. Oh dear. You definitely need to rethink the empathy thing.

curlew Sat 27-Jul-13 23:52:13

"Then evidently you need to consider the possibility that you are wrong about your powers of empathy, curlew."

Obviously. But, frankly, if every spontaneous gesture has to be mediated by every single possible mental issue that people might or might not have, then life would be impossible. I would most certainly not take in the washing of someone I knew to have OCD. I would most certainly not think " oh,it's chucking it down, but I'd better now take I next door's washing I case they have OCD"

deepfriedsage Sat 27-Jul-13 23:55:25

I don't have OCD, would you create a job that physically caused pain and fainting/collapse by interfering with my washing?

ladymariner Sat 27-Jul-13 23:57:58

Agree totally with maggietess

fiverabbits Sat 27-Jul-13 23:58:22

When I was staying at a caravan site another caravan owner who I didn't know had hung out 4 big bath towels on an airer. Then they went out for the morning, when it started to rain I took the towels into my awning and hung them up to dry. When it stopped raining I put them back on the airer. When the owner came back she was trying to work out why the towels were dry but there was puddles everywhere. I gave the game away by laughing. She was really grateful as they were the only towels she had.

minkembernard Sun 28-Jul-13 00:00:32

I have done it for my neighbours when it was a white wash and i was lighting a bbq. they did not seem to mind and have done the same in return.

and a lot of it was underwear. but it was clean underwear so no big deal. i would rather get my bras put in a bag than stinking of burgers.

think you are over thinking it Op it is fine smile

jchocchip Sun 28-Jul-13 00:00:42

If it was just drizzly rain I'd probably prefer my washing to be left and dry later in the day. However a downpour like today, if my washing was nearly dry and had been kept from a soaking Id be really grateful smile You did what you thought was right at the time and that's the best any of us can do, really.

Bogeyface Sun 28-Jul-13 00:04:33

Not read the thread but when I was a kid and there was downpour Ma would leg it out to get our washing in and yell me and DSis to go and get our NDN washing in. It was what you did, she did it for us too.

This was in the late 70's/early 80's btw.

I would do it now for my neighbour but NDN A doesnt hang hers out, and NDN B is a total fecking bitch and her washing can fall to bits for all I care!

fiverabbits Sun 28-Jul-13 00:07:15

I would love to take in my neighbours washing but in the 9 years they have lived next door they haven't hung out as much as a tea towel even though they have a large garden. They had the tumble dryer going last week when it was 29 degrees, it is in their conservatory which has the only door to the garden which was shut along with all their windows.

trixymalixy Sun 28-Jul-13 00:10:23

I would be very grateful as would most normal people.

fiverabbits Sun 28-Jul-13 00:15:17

When DH ad I went out today we left out a line of washing but when it rained neither DD or DS aged 34 and 32 years old noticed it was raining so I brought it in when I got home it is still hanging in the kitchen nine hours later, hopefully it will be dry by the morning. I only did the washing because it was sunny !

Alisvolatpropiis Sun 28-Jul-13 00:18:47

Yanbu.
You sound like a lovely neighbour.

ChippingInHopHopHop Sun 28-Jul-13 00:52:41

Honestly?

I think you did it with the best of intentions, but if you had just chucked it in the basket I would have preferred you just to have left it. I don't mind if it gets rained on, but I do mind ironing things I wouldn't normally and your idea of 'would be ironed anyway' and mine are probably vastly different grin I admit I am weird I iron tea towels, duvet covers, pillow cases and sod all else - clothes don't get a look in!

Breezy1985 Sun 28-Jul-13 01:10:09

I think you sound lovely, my ndn got my washing in earlier as it started chucking it down while I was bathing DS. I don't hang underwear on the line though and I never iron either, I don't even own one.

But then I don't mind others.in my garden, I often come home to find half the neighbours kids in my garden.

curlew Sun 28-Jul-13 01:13:49

I think you have to remember that you will come across outliers on here- the overwhelming majority of people would be heart warmed and grateful- anyone who isn't- it's, frankly, their problem.

JeanPaget Sun 28-Jul-13 01:13:56

I'd think it was lovely of you!

Even if I'd personally have chosen to just leave it out to dry after the rain/ had very specific views on ironing, I'd still think it was a very kind, well intentioned gesture.

everlong Sun 28-Jul-13 03:42:34

In my old house we had shared access to the back garden.

We all brought each others washing in when it rained.

Would have seemed very rude to leave it!

You did good.

Jan49 Sun 28-Jul-13 04:37:52

I think I'd only do it if I were on friendly terms with the neighbours, not if I didn't really know them. But I've never lived anywhere where I could access someone else's garden or they could access mine.

If someone took mine in, I think I'd be relieved at not having soaking wet washing but maybe uncomfortable, depending on what items it was. I mean, fine it was towels or sheets, a bit uncomfortable if it was more personal stuff. I'm picturing my nosiest neighbour checking what size I wear.blush

everlong Sun 28-Jul-13 04:45:53

My decorator once brought my washing in and folded it neatly.

It had knickers, bras and thongs among it.
<slightly horrified>

I've done it many times in the past, but haven't thought about it for years tbh. Maybe, now that you've broken the ice you will start speaking to your neighbours more or possibly they will run when they see you wink and for what it's worth NEVER assume what other people iron! I just don't! Ever! Anything! If DH wants his work shirts ironed - there's the iron! grin

FrussoHathor Sun 28-Jul-13 06:53:55

and for what it's worth NEVER assume what other people iron!
* justforlaughs* based on what what on the line, the only items that would have creased, would definately be ironed. Knowing what job they do, they would be ironed. Even if nothing else ever was.

This aside, it was raining. I'm not going to stand outside getting drenched while folding NDNs clothes neatly, if I'd have done that it would all be soaked, and therefore a pointless action.

Also, now that I'm into over thinking territory what if I'd folded it wrong? I mean do you fold t-shirts lengthways, or width ways or do the shop fold?
What about socks,do you fold the when you bring them in or when you put them away?
<head explodes>

OrangeLily Sun 28-Jul-13 11:40:34

Everlong... You don't say if your decorator is a man or a woman but surely they would be aware that women wear bras and sometimes pants or thongs? Why are you commenting on that?

FrussoHathor Sun 28-Jul-13 14:22:01

Can safely say there were no thongs on the line. grin

HugAMoo Sun 28-Jul-13 17:22:51

My neighbour does this for us sometimes, I find it kind. However, he refrains when we have our smalls out there, which I am grateful for as that would be a bit weird grin

WhiteandGreen Sun 28-Jul-13 17:35:59

I would think you had definitely overstepped the boundaries of good neighbourliness. Are you honestly saying there were pants on the
line but it was OK cos you didn't touch them?!

everlong Sun 28-Jul-13 17:36:24

Erm odd comment orange

I wouldn't normally expect someone decorating your house to bring in the washing whether they be male or female!
Not really in the job description.

It was a chap. And yes I was slightly embarrassed that he'd been out and brought in some scant underwear!

ll31 Sun 28-Jul-13 17:40:23

surprised anyone thinks it's unreasonable to bring in neighbours washing. Amazed at the shock horror that neighbour might touch their underwear taking it off the line.They're clothes ffs

ChippingInHopHopHop Sun 28-Jul-13 17:46:11

I don't get why some people can't understand that others would find it an invasion of their privacy and would rather the washing got wet.

Get over the fact that others have a different opinion.

... and Curlew, you are wrong. It would not be 'their problem' - people are quite entitled not to want neighbours in their garden messing with their washing - even if it's supposedly a 'kind' thing to do. People put up fences for a reason and it's not just to keep the dog in.

Beastofburden Sun 28-Jul-13 18:00:25

Hmmm. I think that even if my preference was for privacy, I would see it as a kind and neighbourly thought, and I would be pleased to be living next door to someone who cares about being neighbourly and is considerate of others, thoughtful and prepared to help where needed.

Even if I really didn't like people in my garden, I would still think that. Because the number of times you would need to get their washing in is tiny, but having a good neighbour is priceless. Look at all the other threads on music etc.

So, op, I think you did a good, kind and considerate thing and they will see that. Have them round for a drink if you are worried.

As for knickers, meh, once I went back to work I had someone who cared for my younger kids and did the washing at home, and I have long got over the thought that she knows all about my underwear. Privacy is about more personal stuff than just who sees your knickers, IMHO.

FrussoHathor Sun 28-Jul-13 18:14:53

*Are you honestly saying there were pants on the
line but it was OK cos you didn't touch them?!*

Whiteandgreen Without going into a discription of exactly what they had on their line, and even my memory isn't that good I think there were some socks. There may or may not have been pants, but I would have done the not touching the pants thing because I've always done the not touching other people's pants method since I did chores as a child.
I did the unpeg and drop into basket method of removing from line because it was hammering down by the time I got to the 2nd item. Folding would have meant everything would be soaked, as would have inspecting what items they had on their line.

ps. have spoken with neighbour.

ShadowMeltingInTheSun Sun 28-Jul-13 18:15:29

Personally, I'd have found this kind of annoying. I'd prefer the washing to be left on the line until the sun came out to dry it again or until I could sort it out myself.

But I appreciate that most people taking the washing in would be doing it with good intentions, so I'd be doing my best to keep my annoyance to myself.

curlew Sun 28-Jul-13 18:49:27

I do see that there are people who wouldn't like it. But, assuming the getter inner had easy access to the garden, and didn't batter the fence down, then I stick to my line that it is the people who wouldn't like it who need to get over themselves. There is no possible legitimate reason to object to a kindly neighbour rescuing your washing from a thunderstorm. None at all.

SloughCow Sun 28-Jul-13 19:28:20

read this whole thread to see if there was a mention of the neighbours reaction??????????/

notapizzaeater Sun 28-Jul-13 19:33:02

Personally I'd have been delighted, knickers and all :-)

revealall Sun 28-Jul-13 19:40:40

curlew -apart from the fact that they were in your private space touching your things without your knowledge.

Yes it might have been "kind" back in the day something because clothes were relatively expensive and less available then today's bulging wardrobes of Primark specials. Washing machines were slow and a bit crap and tumble dryers an unheard of luxury.

Now people have no space or privacy living on cramped estates the kind thing to do would be to respect that.

NotAQueef Sun 28-Jul-13 19:44:29

What did your neighbour say frusso ?

curlew Sun 28-Jul-13 19:51:13

"Touching your things"- give me strength!

What about taking in a parcel for you? Would you prefer your neighbour to say "sorry- I can't touch that, it's not mine?" What if you went out accidentally leaving your door wide open- could they not close it? Your bin blowing away? You drop a scarf as you run for the bus- best left on the pavement?

Bogeyface Sun 28-Jul-13 19:51:56

apart from the fact that they were in your private space touching your things without your knowledge.

grin Its a bit of washing on line outside! Its not quite on the same level as entering your home and rummaging through your drawers (ooer!). Sorry but I thin "get over yourself" does pretty much cover it. On what planet can you possibly imagine that anyone would care what brand of knickers you wear?!

curlew Sun 28-Jul-13 19:55:55

Ooh, I keep thinking of things. You go out for the day forgetting that you've left the paddling pool filling. Rather your neighbour let your garden flood than "touch your things" by turning the tap off?

revealall Sun 28-Jul-13 20:34:31

How is taking a parcel in the same? Or dropping a scarf - neither involve going into someones space uninvited?

I often leave my back door wide open. We are not a high crime area and my back gate is locked. I would be pissed off if a "kindly" neighbour shut it actually.

I might forgive the paddling pool as it could possibility cause damage to the other neighbours. As I wouldn't mind intervention in any other "emergency" situation.

However leaving washing out in the rain is fine for many people me included and certainly not an emergency. Haven't you read the other thread by the way?

And yes I do make some judgement about people knickers actually even if it's just "lucky cow to be able to wear those..". I assume that if I do it so do others.

Lweji Sun 28-Jul-13 20:37:49

Interesting thread.

Now, I live in a flat.
A while ago, the upstairs neighbour's bra fell on my clothes line, off the kitchen window.

What would you guys have done? grin

PS - I think you did a lovely thing and would thank you, OP.

We did it for our camping neighbours once in the alps. They seemed grateful and it felt like a good thing to do. However it felt a bit awkward the next time it rained.

FrussoHathor Sun 28-Jul-13 20:50:28

this thread has left me double guessing everything. Ndn didn't tell me to F off and stay off their property.
Appeared genuinely grateful.

This may however have been a cover and ndn is now planning my demise. hmm

On what planet can you possibly imagine that anyone would care what brand of knickers you wear?! bogeyface was i meant to check brands?

deepfriedsage Sun 28-Jul-13 20:58:13

Ha, ha at judging knickers, is it wearing judgey pants, hoiked up?

FrussoHathor Sun 28-Jul-13 21:52:59

What brand are judged pants deepfried? Are they a particular style? couldn't be a thong they would hurt too much pulling them up

curlew Sun 28-Jul-13 22:34:59

"PS - I think you did a lovely thing and would thank you, OP."

Now, I don't think she did a "lovely thing". I think she just did a normal, human thing that anybody who wasn't a bit bonkers would do, and would expect to have done for them.

curlew Sun 28-Jul-13 22:37:35

And I don't care if people get cross with me about that last post. I hate the way we think being insular and "looking after number one" is the way to go. I want my children to grow up in a society where we watch out for each other, in big ways and small, and I try my hardest to model that for them.

countrymummy13 Sun 28-Jul-13 22:43:38

Although you may only have had kind intentions, I think as a general rule you should just leave other people's things alone (unless you are very good friends).

The problems is, have you now set a precedent which your neighbours now need to worry about?

What if, like me, they don't mind leaving their washing to get wet then dry again on the line?

And what if, like me, line dried clothes don't get ironed? You've just creased them up!

So now does your neighbour need to worry about leaving her washing out in case you think you've got to go round and take it down?

You can't assume other people think the same as you.

I think the best thing to do is go round and kind of rationalise taking the washing in. Somehow letting the neighbours know that it won't be a regular occurrence and that you thought it would be helpful but perhaps in hindsight it might not have been.

A lovely thought, but perhaps don't do it again.

Maggietess Sun 28-Jul-13 23:19:31

curlew we totally agree. All this double and triple thinking thinking what other people might possibly (but probably don't) think is just NUTS!
Good god people have too much time non their hands and some serious middle class problems if this is the root of all privacy invasion evil.

OP NDN most likely thanked you and was genuine about it. Of she was one of the secret harbingers of privacy doom for stepping inside the hallowed garden of smalls then smile, step ba k and don't go there again... There madness lies!
grin grin

Maggietess Sun 28-Jul-13 23:26:21

As always I apologise for the typos on my phone "if" and "don't" were the two I spotted there.
And im witting back now cringing and waiting to be lambasted (don't normally stick the neck out there, but I couldn't hack it any more!). DH agrees with me so all is good wink wink wink

aufaniae Sun 28-Jul-13 23:32:25

If you did this for me I would be genuinely grateful, and would be happier in general knowing I had someone living next door who was looking out for me.

Fifi2406 Sun 28-Jul-13 23:33:03

Please move next to me! You sound lovely smile

revealall Sun 28-Jul-13 23:46:52

countrymummy13 - yes this sums it up perfectly.

Curlew - you are the reason I would fear someone taking in my washing.
Because even though I have given good good reasons why I would hate you getting my washing off the line apparently it's for my own good. You know better and are being kind and I am being ungrateful and unneighbourly.

Can I reassure you that I do not not look after number one and that I play a very proactive (and understated) role in my community. However taking in someones washing is without at least some sort of inference that this is OK is being a bit needy at best and an assuming busybody nightmare at worst.

Thanks. But no thanks

zatyaballerina Mon 29-Jul-13 00:01:03

I would hate if a neighbour did that tbh, none of ours can see into our garden (high fences and trees) but if they could and invaded my privacy like that I would feel extremely uncomfortable no matter how good their intentions. I don't want people in my space, touching my stuff, end of. I'd think anyone who did that as being very interfering and a bit creepy.

Maggietess Mon 29-Jul-13 00:19:05

revealall finds curlew a bit creepy apparently.... For taking in washing...
Where's the DAILY mail so I can complain "the world's gone mad'

ladymariner Mon 29-Jul-13 01:36:38

revealall how is taking someone's washing in being 'needy'? I really cannot understand this at all.
Op, it was a kind thing you did, the neighbour thanked you as most normal folk would , now carry on with your life. Leave the over thinking to those who seemingly enjoy it and join the rest of us in getting on with things whilst looking out for other people in the process smile

justanuthermanicmumsday Mon 29-Jul-13 01:56:34

I'd be grateful but id be embarrassed if my lingerie was out there, since i do hide it on the lower lines ( rotary line). underwear aside its a very kind thoughtful gesture wht a wonderful neighbour you are.

I had one super neighbour. He would put my washing out when I was heavily pregnant, hed see me struggling with basket waddle waddle.

Garden was also full of weeds and huge the landlord refused to turf or slab it up. So come summer it was a nightmare I'd do what I could but i was pregnant and husband was a.ways working. One day i saw my neighbour digging weeds out for me on a humid summers day. and this was a long garden. I had to go out and tell him to stop but he insisted. I miss that neighbour new ones we hardly see, i don't even know their names.

Are you serious poster suggesting ironing would be am issue, surely if the items are soggy through and through ironing is irrelevant lool

Jux Mon 29-Jul-13 02:45:58

Tbh, I'd hate it, but would assume thst it was kindly meant and would be genuinely grateful to you. I had assumed that I was the only person happy to let washing get wet in the rain and then dry again. Compounded by the physical diffi ulty I have lugging a basket of wet washing outside and keeping my arms up above my head in order to peg it up.

I would actually thank you for thinking so kindly, but I would also babble about why I would normally just leave it there.

FrussoHathor Mon 29-Jul-13 07:18:36

Can I reassure you that I do not not look after number one and that I play a very proactive (and understated) role in my community
head of neighbourhood watch perhaps? hmm

Joking aside, i am grateful that my neighbour was okay about it, and took the gesture in the good will that it was intended.

I'm now off to find some barbwire topped fences to clamber over to inspect the makes of pants, and perhaps move a few garden gnomes about. wink

Morloth Mon 29-Jul-13 07:29:33

I think that is a pretty normal and considerate thing to do OP.

My neighbour brings my bins down my drive for me if they are out late.

They collect the junk mail from around our letterbox if it gets messed up.

If they have the hedgetrimmer out they run it over our hedge as well.

Much the same as if I am weeding, I go a bit further along and do 'their' bit as well. Or grab their mail if it is teeming down and I know they are out (it would appear impossible to buy a waterproof letter box in Oz).

Our firey neighbours were clearing branches on their property the other day and he stuck his head over to ask if I wanted any done, then jumped the fence with the chainsaw (in hand! eep) to do so.

Is all part of normal neighbourly interaction, we don't actually have that much to do with each other on a social basis, but hey, little things make life nice.

The 'neighbours' mentioned above are not all the same household, just the houses that are directly next door or around me.

lazydog Mon 29-Jul-13 07:54:42

Well I'm someone who never irons and personally would have much rather you'd left everything to get rained on and I finally bring it in 2 days later than you'd chucked it, to get creased, into a laundry basket.... BUT I'm also totally aware that no-one would have done what you did with anything but kind intentions.

Peachyjustpeachy Mon 29-Jul-13 07:56:28

OP you are very thoughtful... i'd be pleased.

deepfriedsage Mon 29-Jul-13 09:59:08

Even people who would seethe inside at the ironing you created and wish you left it alone, realise you had good intentions and would thank you.

deepfriedsage Mon 29-Jul-13 10:02:43

Due to your sarcastic comments and nit picking at anyone who doesn't think you are wonderful, I am changing my mind, YABU and now I can see why someone earlier accused you of being needy.

FrussoHathor Mon 29-Jul-13 11:40:16

Oh so deepfried 2 saracastic comments, and a couple of lighthearted ones, because this thread should have died at least 48 hours ago and I'm needy?
And can you quote where I was nit picking, because I fail to see that I have. except perhap this one

MrsCampbellBlack Mon 29-Jul-13 11:50:25

Frusso, am currently sat watching my washing getting rained on. If you are my neighbour please come and get it in for me wink

Seriously, before posting on here, I would never have thought getting a neighbour's washing in would result in anything but a thank you. I live and learn.

MissTweed Mon 29-Jul-13 11:54:19

To me it depends on how close you were. If I lived next to one of my close friends then yes definitely but I certainly wouldn't do it for a neighbour especially as you say you are not on talking terms at the mo. if my neighbour did this to me I would feel slightly violated, especially if I had underwear etc hanging up. Even though I know that they meant well I would rather if had wet washing. I know I'm in the minority and everyone's different but that's just me :D

FrussoHathor Mon 29-Jul-13 12:18:57

New question to throw into the ball pit...

if you let your washing get wet, do you wash it again or not?
and if you wash it again, do you live on the coast?

ChippingInHopHopHop Mon 29-Jul-13 12:37:48

No - I don't wash it again. It's fresh water, just another rinse cycle smile

(Why do you ask about being on the coast? I was the same when I did live on the coast. <Which I miss <<SOB>>>)

janey68 Mon 29-Jul-13 12:46:24

This may have already been mentioned as its a long thread, but this is one of those scenarios where the best thing is to leave the washing , but ask what the neighbour would wish you to do in future

In our old house, I was on maternity leave one spring so home a lot, while our neighbours with teenage kids were busy at work and school. We has typical spring weather for weeks- blustery and great for drying but showers now and then. They had a big family and washing out most days so I just asked whether, since I was around during the day, they wanted me to bring it in if rain looked imminent. They were fine and very grateful . But I wouldn't have just done it without asking; it's a little intrusive to assume that teenage sons and daughters will be ok with a neighbour handling their undies

FrussoHathor Mon 29-Jul-13 12:49:11

chipping only because I'm on the coast, and would wash it again due to the salt.

MiaowTheCat Mon 29-Jul-13 13:06:07

I'd be grateful but inwardly a bit cringey about my pants being on the line. I'm funny I'll admit - I really don't like other people touching my underwear (apart from DH obviously since we have two kids!)... my mum takes it upon herself to bring my washing in when she's here and it drives me fucking nuts (but it keeps her away from reorganising my kitchen cupboards and other more irritating exploits).

Yes I dry my pants outside (like someone else mentioned - I hide them on the inner reaches of a rotary airer), but in my own garden with a 6 foot fence I tend to work on the assumption no one's going to be furtling through them really.

cjel Mon 29-Jul-13 14:30:01

Did you hear from them? were they ok?

Crinkle77 Mon 29-Jul-13 14:40:16

sounds like a nice thing to do and this may be a way that you get on speaking terms

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