To think addressing your unborn child/newborn baby/child who can't read on fb is strange?

(106 Posts)

I'm new to FB. I was weak and gave into family and friend pressure to have an account for events and groups I belong to. I find many elements totally bizarre (outright racism, sexism and general twattery) but try to steer clear/defriend members who partake in that behaviour. What I can't escape us generally level headed, normally sound friends or family who address their offspring (born and unborn) as a status e.g today someone directly addressed their one year old saying 'Happy Birthday X, one year today since you let up our lives. We love you the world over blah blah blah'

Is this a new custom? I haven't addressed the Gertrude clan when its their birthday unless 2. They can read 2. They have a FB account. AIBU to find these status' odd or us it very normal?

Apologies for fat fingered phone typing.

bearleftmonkeyright Mon 08-Jul-13 15:16:16

It's normal, what can you do? (shrugs)

Tee2072 Mon 08-Jul-13 15:18:24

No different than writing letters for them to read late, is it? I have a letter a month to my son from before he was born and the first two years of his life.

MrsBungle Mon 08-Jul-13 15:21:02

Totally normal. Hth.

maddening Mon 08-Jul-13 15:26:53

Did you write a birthday card for your dc?

Jubelteen Mon 08-Jul-13 15:43:22

YANBU, it's weird, I assume that her one year-old lives with her, so she said 'Happy Birthday' and gave a card this morning. Only reason to post on FB is to remind people who may have forgotten don't really care that her wonderful child is one today.

bellablot Mon 08-Jul-13 15:44:27

I'm on the same page as you OP, it's ridiculous, people do it so everyone can comment happy birthday and apparently the more 'likes' you receive the better you are (more of a twat you are).

I don't write my children birthday cards, why would I if they can't read it?

Latara Mon 08-Jul-13 15:49:15

YANBU, I have FB and find this very annoying.

Latara Mon 08-Jul-13 15:52:24

Like stealth boasting; ''ooh look at meee I have a child...''

IME photos and messages regarding babies / Pregnancy / children / marriage ALWAYS get the most likes.

(Can you tell i'm a slightly bitter singleton?) grin

pinkyredrose Mon 08-Jul-13 15:56:06

Whatever rocks their boat. It's not hurting anyone is it?

pinkyredrose Mon 08-Jul-13 15:57:30

Tee2072 that's really lovely about the letters smile

What a great idea.

JessieMcJessie Mon 08-Jul-13 16:03:12

I hate it when people address cards from children who are not old enough to have any idea who the recipient is or what a birthday/ Christmas etc is. My pet, pet hate is "from Tony, Sheila and bump". Vom.

Jubelteen Mon 08-Jul-13 16:05:51

tee2072 the letters are totally different, a lovely idea to put in their keepsake box, which is personal and private and can be read in years to come. Is a FB message posted today going to be accessible in 2033 when the child is 21?

Annakin31 Mon 08-Jul-13 16:09:16

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Annakin31 Mon 08-Jul-13 16:11:22

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

KellyElly Mon 08-Jul-13 16:15:32

It's their child's birthday, they are expressing it more to family and friends on FB than their one year old who can't read obviously. Whats' The problem? It's not odd at all. In fact if someone is a regular status updater it would be odder if they didn't comment on important life events on FB.

KellyElly Mon 08-Jul-13 16:15:50

*What's the problem

Tee2072 Mon 08-Jul-13 16:17:24

Well, I write them on my blog, so not private at all.

Guess I'm twatty. shrug Whatever.

ThisWayForCrazy Mon 08-Jul-13 16:28:53

Would you get a birthday card for their 1st, 2nd, 3rd birthday?

Crinkle77 Mon 08-Jul-13 16:36:10

Latara so with you on that

musicalmum40 Mon 08-Jul-13 16:56:29

I'm with you it's downright weird. So is wishing your spouse Happy Birthday on fb. Like you don't see them in person?!! Unfortunately it's catching on/. I don't really give a monkeys but this is one practice I won't be adopting

FeckOffCup Mon 08-Jul-13 17:12:49

I've never written to my DD on facebook but I do write her name in cards to other people, she's part of the family, to me it would feel wrong only putting from me and DH and leaving her out.

bellablot Mon 08-Jul-13 17:20:56

Annakin a shame for who exactly and why?

I do like the idea of letters but I like photo story books even better and hopefully my adult children will to.

FB messages are self-indulgent, my opinion. smile

Snoot Mon 08-Jul-13 17:26:37

What drives me mad is the really soggy-baby-brained, previously articulate women who post as their baby confused

AllYoursBabooshka Mon 08-Jul-13 17:30:40

But that's nice, isn't? Someone saying their child lights up their life.

I like nice things.

AllYoursBabooshka Mon 08-Jul-13 17:31:02

However posting AS your baby is slightly creepy.

phantomnamechanger Mon 08-Jul-13 17:31:53

I think it's odd too - odder still is the way people address dead friends and relatives.

Mum its been a year since you left us, love you and miss you. RIPxxx

its attention seeking, and it has replaced simple talking ie telling a friend youre a bit down cos its a difficult anniversary - no, paste it on the WWW instead

AllYoursBabooshka Mon 08-Jul-13 17:37:06

Isn't FB one big hub for attention seeking though?

It's a look at my photo, like my post twirlathon.

Posting as your baby is strange.

But I like messages to children. They make me smile that there's this little child out there who's loved so much.

phantom, a lot of people do that.

so you know what. Its not attention seeking, and FUCK YOU.

combinearvester Mon 08-Jul-13 18:08:00

Even worse than people who post as their baby...people whose profile picture is their baby/children.

Women of the UK - reclaim your identity!

AnotherWorld Mon 08-Jul-13 18:15:04


It is not normal. It's bizarre.

These are the people I delete or hide on FB.

themaltesecat Mon 08-Jul-13 19:02:36

My husband's Facebook profile picture is of our baby daughter. What's not to love? She is far better looking than either of us, and it's rather comical reading his belligerent, middle-aged, Telegraph-rustling rantings accompanied by a picture of a tiny little girl in a bobbly jumper with a pink satin bow on her head.

Snoot Mon 08-Jul-13 19:03:37

I find it entertaining when you get someone who over shares, sometimes to the point of getting banned by FB. Labour pictures, posts about their stitches, breast feeding photos with everyone looking knackered and hardly coping, not the serene earth mother they'd perhaps envisaged. I know it sounds cruel but when your timeline fills with babies you have to find amusement somewhere! grin

It's nice for a child to be loved, of course it is. But can you not just directly address your child through, I don't know, spoken language? Do you actions on yr child's birthday not show how lived they are?

I thought things like this are posted to get likes/comments. Social cocaine. How do the likes/comments benefit the child if they can't comprehend them?

Never thought I'd be a Luddite but this is one modern trait I will never adopt because Just can not see the merit in it.

Snoot-not had the real time labour status yet. Quite look forward to that!

Snoot Mon 08-Jul-13 19:41:46

When people post on another FB page and for some reason your timeline notifies you, what's that about? I found out about an old school friend's haemorrhoids than way shock

phantomnamechanger Mon 08-Jul-13 19:43:57

nice to meet you too K hmm

HappyDoll Mon 08-Jul-13 19:46:58

This is a stupid practise. I get it all the time...and currently it's the hoardes of parents congratulating their infants on excellent school reports. I just want to say 1. Infant school reports are always lovely, 2. your infant isn't on fb and 3. isn't your infant right their in front of your face...isn't it more efficient to just, I don't know, say it to them? Stupid.

phantomnamechanger Mon 08-Jul-13 19:51:53

FWIW, what I actually meant was that it IS odd to address the dead - they cant see it or read it, just as babies cant. Only in this case, they never will, which IMHO makes it odder, as it CAN'T be argued that it's a sort of keepsake thing.

Why not just say - "I am having hard time today as its a year since mum died/first birthday without her" or whatever, rather than addressing the post to the deceased directly

anyway, each to his own - folk are quite entitled to do it, others entitled to express that they find it odd - no need really for shouting abuse over the net though.

flipchart Mon 08-Jul-13 19:52:08

It's no better or or worse than people writing a message to their dead parents or friends. The dead can't read either.

I couldn't care less what people do with regard to this, it just goes over my head. Whatever floats your boat!

flipchart Mon 08-Jul-13 19:52:52

Lolz at the cross post there about the dead!

phantomnamechanger Mon 08-Jul-13 19:53:07

oh yes it's report bragging season here too!

HappyDoll Mon 08-Jul-13 19:58:22

I have one friend in particular that posts messages to her toddler at night when she is sleeping like 'Dear dd, please settle and have a good night, mummy is tired'. It's odd, thing is I adore this woman otherwise, just find this fb practise odd...but then I find most fb behaviour stupid.

themaltesecat Mon 08-Jul-13 20:01:16

The world would be a much poor place if, say, Robert Burns hadn't written Address to a Haggis.

Fair fa' your honest, sonsie face,
Great chieftain o' the puddin-race!
Aboon them a' ye tak your place,
Painch, tripe, or thairm:
Weel are ye wordy of a grace
As lang's my arm.

Or if Robert Browning had not addressed his dear, departed wife in Prospice:

O thou soul of my soul! I shall clasp thee again,
And with God be the rest!

Why should the addressee have to be able to answer? That is tosh.

themaltesecat Mon 08-Jul-13 20:02:03

poorer place, that should be. Running away before I find more typos..

HappyDoll Mon 08-Jul-13 20:06:30

Fb tripe cannot be compared to Burns' musings!!!!!!

Towanda Mon 08-Jul-13 20:21:13

I address posts to my DC. I address posts to my dead child. I don't give a shit what anyone thinks of me got doing so though I'd hope anyone who thinks I'm weird for doing it would just delete me.

Towanda Mon 08-Jul-13 20:21:56

For not got.

ageofgrandillusion Mon 08-Jul-13 20:28:18

YANBU. Its harmless i suppose but it is also thoroughly pointless and i strongly suspect that it is only those of a lower intellectual capacity who engage in such daft, infantile behaviour. But, as i say, each to their own.

HappyDoll Mon 08-Jul-13 21:54:54

What do you get from it though Towanda? Isn't it just seeking attention that is better got from telling people how you feel? When I tell my friends how much I adore my kids they smile and join in the proud mummy moments. Most people who see those fb statuses just roll their eyes or at best take a nanosecond to click a 'like' button. I way prefer the former interaction.

Towanda Mon 08-Jul-13 22:07:25

Not attention seeking in the slightest, I wouldn't care if noone saw, liked or commented. It's nice that people do but it doesn't matter. It doesn't hurt anyone if I use Facebook whichever way I choose to - if anyone doesn't like it, they're free to delete, hide, block me.

I'm far from alone, particularly in posting to my daughter who died.

pleiadianpony Mon 08-Jul-13 22:12:49

Yes it's bizarre. Just like people who talk about themselves in the third person or discuss God as if God was a person. Strange and Infantile. However. Each to their own.

Jessie I have signed cards 'and Bump' I think because to me, this person growing insidde me feels very real and very much part of our family already. Is it generally 'vom' inducing or just you that feels like that?

sweetiepie1979 Mon 08-Jul-13 22:21:29

Self promotion I have a child. It's embarrassing to read really.

HappyDoll Mon 08-Jul-13 22:21:44

I get that it's up to you how you use fb and I respect that. I am just trying to understand what you get from it,simply because I don't understand and I see it a lot. If you don't want attention, you don't want people to see it, so why do it?

Actually have given this a bit more thought. IABU to think this is a modern day thing. It has happened before Facebook in the family announcements section of local newspapers where they have First Birthday sections and In remembrance and Birth announcements.

I didn't mean that if someone can not respond its tosh. I said if someone can"t actually comprehend then what's the point. Actually quite humbled and cross with myself for upsetting people who have lost a child. I'm sorry.

Jubelteen Mon 08-Jul-13 22:24:43

phantom I agree people should be direct "Everyone congratulate me because I gave birth one year ago", "I feel like shit because so-and-so died ten years ago and I miss them"

Towanda Mon 08-Jul-13 22:30:28

For dd1's first anniversary I put a birthday remembrance notice in the paper. I didn't want or expect replies, she wouldn't have been able to read it but in the absence of celebrating it was something I could do to say hey world it's her birthday. The following year I couldn't afford it and the year after that I used Facebook to do it. I didn't expect replies. I have 4 dc since then and they each get a birthday message each year - all my DC get the same.

Towanda Is it a way of keeping a line if communication open to your DC? Hope you don't mind me asking it's just I do understand this a little, DD had a twin who didn't survive past 14 weeks gestation (its called vanishing twin syndrome) so on DD's birthday I release a balloon to acknowledge the existence of this baby.

SHarri13 Mon 08-Jul-13 22:34:35

Ha, real time labour updates are hilariously stupid. '5cm, Woop, Woop'

And messages to partners and spouses, blerghhhh, pass me the sick bucket!

needaholidaynow Mon 08-Jul-13 22:35:45

Thinking back to the holiday thread a few weeks ago. I said people posting about their holidays when they are on holiday is sad and I got slaughtered.

People posting about their children however is classed as stealth boasting and posting about how amazing your holiday isn't.

I realised I was in the wrong when I said that. Anyone can post what they want. But this ill feeling towards anyone mentioning their children, or writing a birthday message on Facebook, is classed as boasting! Everything else people just shrug and say "my friends can post what they like. I'm always happy to see what my friends are getting up to."

Anything to do with kids is a taboo confused Why?

Towanda Mon 08-Jul-13 22:38:13

Partly. Partly so my DC know they are all equally loved (2 can read now)

I think many things on fb are bizarre, weird, odd or plain stupid. Posting to dead people and children who can't read isn't up there for me. Each to their own as long as it's not offensive it illegal?

HooverFairy Mon 08-Jul-13 22:52:19

Over sharing pisses me off, unfortunately I've had real time labour updates, as do 'cryptic' status updates leading to "what's up hun?", "nothing hun", "inbox me", "yeah I've inboxed you hun" "thanks hun" - Facebook at its MOST irritating, this is attention seeking at its finest, giving half the story and posting nothing else for hours but then reverting to inbox because whatever it is is private. Idiots!

However, what's wrong with talking about your children? It's nice to put your little thoughts on, they don't harm anyone and it's probably 'what is on you mind'. Profile pictures of your children are absolutely not an example of a loss of identify. My profile picture is of my baby, he's cute. I don't care what anyone else thinks or cares to comment, he's on there because I like the picture. I still have an identity. It's the same with pets, holidays, new houses, new cars etc. No harm done.

Facebook is a medium to release thoughts, we have control over who we are 'friends' with and who we are not. If you don't like the way someone uses Facebook then don't be friends with them. If you are too worried about the implications of defriending then simply hide their posts from your newsfeed. I imagine that posts to deceased loved ones are a ways of still feeling like there is a connection, or at least a small acknowledgement to the world that you haven't forgotten - what, exactly, is bloody wrong with that????

HappyDoll Mon 08-Jul-13 22:57:30

Thank you Towanda and I can relate. Some years I need to verbalise that it is DDs b'day and others I just spend the day at her graveside. But I still don't understand what you get from putting it on fb? Wouldn't it be better to speak to your friends / family.
The whole living childs birthday thing still bemuses me - it's not a taboo, I just don't get it. Don't get me wrong I'll post after a 6th b'day party or whatever but usually along the lines of 'that was fun, now I'm gonna get vair drunk!' It's me talking to my friends who are on fb.

cerealqueen Mon 08-Jul-13 23:03:50

Maybe they can read, don't you know how talented some children are these days. grin

jaabaar Mon 08-Jul-13 23:06:00

Ohhhh dear..... I'm one of those who occasionally writes such stuff.
Did not realise how annoying it is to others...

I even opened a hotmail (!) account in my dd name and sometimes send her emails either with funny things she said, or poems, or what values I try to teach her, funny things she does etc.

When she is a certain age on one of her birthdays maybe when she is 14 I will give her a gift box with the email address and password....

I do this as a memory keeper... We forget so many tiny precious moments.

I know it's silly but it makes me happy and I'm sure she will find it warming to read it all.... Hopefully

jaabaar Mon 08-Jul-13 23:09:13

Word by word exactly what I think as well

pleiadianpony Mon 08-Jul-13 23:15:46

I think i'm a bit conscious that children are little people in their own right who in years to come might not be happy to have lots of pictures and status updates about them 'out there' in the world.

God, I wonder how i'd feel now if there was a public ally available ongoing record of me as a child or even worse, teenager?!!! I guess our generation of children won't know any different.

jaabar I love that. That is personal though, between you and your dd. It's different. I have a little book and box for my ds.

twinklestar2 Mon 08-Jul-13 23:16:55

Ah jaabar I think that's a really nice idea.

IRCL Mon 08-Jul-13 23:39:32

Jaabar that's a lovely idea, reminds me of the advert.. Think it was Google?!

I share what I want on Facebook, I figure if people don't like it they know where the delete button is.

NigellaEllaElla Mon 08-Jul-13 23:43:51

I'm with OP on this. It's odd and pointless in my opinion. Not just about children though, I've seen people wish husbands a Happy Birthday on it - To my gorgeous husband, happy birthday, love you so much! - And the husband isn't even on FB. Why?????

This I could deal with - It's my husbands birthday today! Love him loads!

It's not the posts about birthdays etc I have a problem with, it's addressing them to someone who will never know anything about them!

And a FB post cannot be compared to a birthday card, that's a ridiculous comparison to make. You are sending the card to an individual as a keepsake, not sharing the wishes with god knows how many people, but not the one it's intended for.

Dixiefish Mon 08-Jul-13 23:48:12

I don't think the message is intended for the baby - surely it's aimed at friends and family, particularly if accompanied by a cute picture of the birthday child.

AllegraLilac Mon 08-Jul-13 23:57:52

Note to everyone - the elements of Facebook you find bizarre - ie, outright racism, homophobia, sexism etc... are not elements of Facebook. They are elements of the people you know.

The problem people have with Facebook is usually their friends, not Facebook. It's just that before Facebook your friends' twattery usually went unseen.

katykuns Tue 09-Jul-13 00:05:42

agree with everything hooverfairy wrote.

I am like the worst person ever according to this thread, I have pretty much done all of it (bar the writing as my child... I do think that's a bit strange). My profile pic is of my baby, I wrote a status about how proud I was saying well done to my 7 year old, I posted up live labour statuses and scan photos. I go with the opinion that if someone doesn't like it they can remove me. I don't constantly do it every day, but I do like to do it occasionally. Most of my friends like or comment, so I don't think I am annoyinggrin

angusandelspethsthistlewhistle Tue 09-Jul-13 00:20:40

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

garlicsmutty Tue 09-Jul-13 00:30:52

Yabu and way too literal, OP. I'll have to forgive you as you're new to FB and probably see it as a written medium, rather than the extension of "talking to friends" that it is for most people.

You would sing Happy Birthday at a one-year-old's party, wouldn't you, despite the fact that the baby neither knows nor cares about it's birthday?

garlicsmutty Tue 09-Jul-13 00:31:59

its, dammit! I wrote you're for your earlier on, too. What's happened? Has my grammar melted? blush

SunshineBossaNova Tue 09-Jul-13 00:56:12

Meh. I left a 'missing you on your birthday' message on the FB page of a dead friend this week. I don't know his family personally, but thought they might like to know that they're not the only ones thinking about him.

Oh, and YABU.

differentnameforthis Tue 09-Jul-13 04:18:19

First rule of fb...if you don't like what people post, unfriend them. It is their page & they can post what they like.

Tee2072 Tue 09-Jul-13 05:15:12

BTW, most of this stuff has been going on longer than FB.

LiveJournal is used the same way.

So was MySpace.

Stop blaming FB for making you a misery gut.

Or, hey, stop using it. It's not required.

Alconleigh Tue 09-Jul-13 06:42:23

I do think there is a definite recent element of things not being real unless you document them and publish them for others to see. I am not talking about people wanting to commemorate a child they have lost etc here by the way, I understand that. But Eg on nights out with younger friends. They can't just be in the moment, enjoying the evening. It's group photos every 10 mins, to be instantly uploaded. I get that it's virtually effortless to do so, but why is showing that you're having a good time more important than actually having it?

exoticfruits Tue 09-Jul-13 06:54:34

FB causes such upset! Don't go on if you don't like it- or choose your friends more carefully.

SummersHere Tue 09-Jul-13 06:58:58

Yanbu, people share far too much on fb. When I see updates from friends wishing their babies a happy birthday I just think why don't you just wish them a happy birthday to their face, they're right there in the room with you.
Yesterday a friend of mine announced her child did their first poo on the potty, I mean in what world is that of any interest to anyone other than the parents?
Fair enough write in a journal or something but to share info like that with hundreds of people is just weird and unnecessary imo.

saintmerryweather Tue 09-Jul-13 07:03:07

its nothing but attention seeking.

Bunbaker Tue 09-Jul-13 07:05:01

It is because far too many people are too full of their own self importance. It is "look at me" on the internet - just attention seeking IMO.

As a private person I really cannot understand why some people want to live their life so publicly.

mynameisnotmichaelcaine Tue 09-Jul-13 07:06:22

I always post when it's my Mum's anniversary. I usually write something like"Missing Mum today, 9 years". Mainly it's to warn people that I will be vile and unreasonable all day. I don't want to tell everyone I see face to face as, obviously unreasonably, I find the fact that my Mum died when I was 24 and three weeks away from giving birth a tad upsetting.

I also post when it is my dc's birthday. Usually a pic of their excited face and "Happy Birthday X, 7 today!" This is mainly to remind my brother that it is their birthday.

If people don't like it, they know where the unfriend button is!

maja00 Tue 09-Jul-13 07:20:50

I like hearing about my friend's children/holidays/weddings.

I think some people's problem is they just add people indiscriminately to Facebook. If these people aren't your friends, and you don't want updates about their lives, don't add them or block them from your newsfeed. It's really not hard.

exoticfruits Tue 09-Jul-13 07:33:20

I agree maja- too many people just add acquaintances that they couldn't care less about. Keep to a few real friends and you won't have the problem.

At least it s short. Blogs are far worse.

icklemssunshine1 Tue 09-Jul-13 07:39:47

I'm with previous posters who say the "cryptic" messages are the most annoying but I choose not to comment in them.

DD was 2 last week & both DH & I write a status not aimed at her directly but stated how she had brought joy into our lives. I also mark by DF's anniversary of his passing & this September I'll also honour the baby I lost on their birthday. Yes it maybe "attention seeking" but I only have true friends & family linked to me & its nothing I would say to them IRL. FB to me is about sharing, if people annoy you maybe they aren't your "true" friends & you should just hide then or "unfriend" them?

ZillionChocolate Tue 09-Jul-13 07:40:47

How about people who post to their partners when they're in the same house? Can we agree that's pointless attention seeking?

hamdangle Tue 09-Jul-13 07:42:58

I have a friend on Facebook that posts happy 5/6/7 month birthday DD every month! And not just one post about each imaginary birthday either. Same person also posted about DD using their name before they were born e.g. "Sophie's feeling happy today. Just read her a bedtime story" Or "bought Sophie some chocolate. Yum yum." Stop it. Just stop it.

I also really hate, with a passion, people who post pictures of their child's massive pile of presents at Christmas or birthdays. I can understand taking a pic of the child happily opening the presents and posting that but what actual reason does a person have for taking a picture of the unopened presents and then putting it up on FB other than to boast about how much you spoil your kids/ money you have? Gah!

I like seeing pictures of my friends' or family's children but I definitely think it becomes an obsession for some people and they feel the need to share every little part of their life.

jaabaar Tue 09-Jul-13 09:26:34

I find nothing more sad when I see 3 people in a living room, each with their phones posting and reading FB in an eerie silence....

I have seen so much communication disappear. I used to have lovely discussions with SIL. Since she discovered FB she never talks anymore, doesn't pay attention to her kids. When you visit she disappears in other room and checks her FB for long periods of time.

My husband asked her why you have to do this while you have visitors? She says because she has to answer to messages.....

She went out for lunch with a friend and during lunch they post each other on FB...

I find it all very sad. You should not let any social media take over your life at the cost of everything else....

ilovechips Tue 09-Jul-13 09:51:33

If you don't like what people post then de-friend. Or if that's a bit awkward, eg family, just hide them from your news feed. You're not being unreasonable to find some posts irritating, but it is unreasonable to not do something about it! People can post what they like on their wall.

It was actually my dsis who did the posting to my DN yesterday. Then her DH did it. Then his Manna. Then his godparents. All wishing one little boy Happy Birthday and how they live him sooooooo much but he isn't going to ever see it hmm I can't defriend my sister but I will hide her news feed when she irritates. I didn't know you could do it.

The passive aggressive 'Some people are horrible. I'll get over it but hope you feel good ' type posts are purely and utterly attention seeking. How can anyone argue with that?

Bunbaker Tue 09-Jul-13 18:49:15

"I think some people's problem is they just add people indiscriminately to Facebook. If these people aren't your friends, and you don't want updates about their lives, don't add them or block them from your newsfeed. It's really not hard"

I agree. I have about 20 friends on Facebook because they are genuine friends, and none of my friends post twattish stuff. Someone (age 13) at DD's school has over 1500 "friends". How can you possibly be real friends with that many people?

happyhorse Tue 09-Jul-13 18:59:27

I have a FB 'friend' who wrote a message to her cat. I wrote that I was very impressed that her cat was on Facebook as mine couldn't even read yet. She didn't reply grin

garlicsmutty Tue 09-Jul-13 19:18:14

When I speak to my friends with younger DC - on the phone, with our voices - the conversation's at least 25% updates about the kids, and 50% asides to DC: "It's in the fridge, just help yourself ... Why is she crying? STOP HITTING HER! ... No, where did you last have it? ... I'm talking, please go in the other room ... etc etc" grin

Facebook's just an extension of that. It's called 'sharing' because that's what we do, share pieces of our lives with friends.

NigellaEllaElla Tue 09-Jul-13 19:46:35

I have no problem with people sharing bits of their lives with friends. I'm not on FB but have been but I love Twitter.

However what the OP is objecting to is addressing children/people directly that can't possibly see the posts, and I agree with her. Simply daft and highly annoying.

YummyYummyYum Tue 09-Jul-13 20:50:42

My aunt (she is just 39) became a mother through adoption and she is 'guilty' of posting many lots and lots of messages to her baby boy, from the day she became a mother (when she took her baby home) and now his first birthday.

She was a virgin when she got married (old fashioned Catholic family) and only after she got married (she was 30 years old) she found out she had endometriosis, so advanced she had to have a hysterectomy.

I do not think it's a stealth boast, I think she knows she has been blessed with a child and wants to share her happiness with her fb friends.

oreocookiez Tue 09-Jul-13 21:08:52

Fb is complete garbage. It is mostly self indulgant posts by people who want others to think they have an oh so amazing life. Id rather phone my mates for a chat, visit and meet up. Fb 'friends' are mostly not friends. People posting to their babies are doing it so people will say ahhh isnt that sweet. YANBU you are just normal! X

MyHumpsMyLovelyBabyBumps Tue 09-Jul-13 21:16:28


FunkyNails Tue 09-Jul-13 21:16:52

YANBU I have a friend who has set up pages for her kids (with fake birthdays obv) she will check in with photos our day at the beach then tag her DDs 2 and 10 weeks! That seems odd but to be fair sometimes nice to see and certainly not the most annoying of offensive thing I
I have seen on Facebook. The one that annoys me is people posting football comments Come On my team" like oh yeah they'll win now you posted that I don't mind if its along the lines of discussing the game and starting an actual conversation just the pointless "My team rule" from grown adults.

Fuzzysnout Tue 09-Jul-13 22:08:36

After the cryptic posters, the most pointless are those who post those stupid pictures / memes about how wonderful it is to have a daughter & put 'share if you love your daughter'. Always gives me the rage - who doesn't love their kids FFS & if you want to declare your love for them, bloody well tell them, don't copy some pointless shite from fb.

exoticfruits Wed 10-Jul-13 06:38:11

These posts about 'FB being garbage'- 'self indulgent posts' etc always make me smile. It isn't FB - it is the people you choose to have as 'friends'- quite clearly they are not friends! Prune it down to real friends- lots of people have more than a hundred and probably don't have the remotest interest in the majority of them.

cerealqueen Fri 12-Jul-13 10:02:58

I wish there was a like button for that comment Fuzzysnout!

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