to think it is not polite to keep breastfeeding when you have been asked to stop -

(71 Posts)
TanglednotTamed Mon 08-Jul-13 14:23:47

I'm looking at you, DD.

Three times, I have said 'One, two, three, BLAST OFF' - which is our trigger for you to unlatch.

And what do you do? You clamp your mouth tighter and shake your head like a dog coming out of water. Which is quite uncomfortable. And if I work a finger in to unlatch you, then you bite it.

I know it's hot, and your back molars are coming through. But this is very poor manners. And from the glint in your eye, I think you know that.

It's damn lucky you're so cute, that's all.

BitBewildered Mon 08-Jul-13 14:25:30


Pascha Mon 08-Jul-13 14:25:44

grin Thought it was just mine! Our trigger is "chopchop onetwo onetwo" which fails at least half the time.

I came on to say "unless its the child doing the asking yabu" grin
But yanbu

chill13 Mon 08-Jul-13 14:30:39

I was ready with yabu too but yanbu. my little one is just the same.

Celador Mon 08-Jul-13 14:31:16

DS shrieks wildly as if in great torment whenever I unlatch him

This is why it's 2.30 and I haven't got dressed. Or had lunch, unless you count 2 chocolate biscuits and a slice of mango :-(

Doingakatereddy Mon 08-Jul-13 14:31:16

It's obviously a small DD revolt, mine is sweetly sleeping as long as my nipple is in mouth clamping distance. Should I dare to move she howls like a banshee & gives everyone the Shrek cat eyes.

Some days <whispers> I wish she was bloody bottle fed

Mama1980 Mon 08-Jul-13 14:34:42

grin My ds is just like that he sleeps ok so long as my nipple is within reaching distance but if I try to prise him off or heaven forbid move away he screams blue murder until said nipple re appears....

MooseBeTimeForSpring Mon 08-Jul-13 14:35:24

I say "booby wants to go to sleep" to my 18 month old DS. Most of the time he rolls over and goes to sleep too. Sometimes he doesn't. Booby might be asleep but mummy most definitely isn't.

<knows he will stop nursing eventually, but wonders when>

mrstigs Mon 08-Jul-13 14:36:23

grin , my littlest does the headshake too whilst latched. I usually say 'right, all done now?' and she gets off, but several times recently she's decided to take this as a real question with more than one answer, and shakes her head emphatically whilst grinning and drinking. I admire her ability to do these things at the same time but am rather worried that I'll be able to tuck my nipples in my socks by the time she's finished with them...

WildeRumpus Mon 08-Jul-13 14:39:20

Ah hello! Ds2 is 7 weeks and won't be without boob today so all trips out have been cancelled and ds1 is kindly making do with the paddling pool. I have so much to do today but instead I am sitting, sitting, sitting... Arf.

Celador Mon 08-Jul-13 14:41:23

This thread has made me feel a whole lot better, thanks OP!

DS is currently asleep on my legs, i.e. within eyeshot of nipples.

I have leg cramp but am too afraid to move.

SimplyRedHead Mon 08-Jul-13 14:43:26

I feel your pain! Have to leave for school run in 6 mins but 12 week old won't take the hint!

itsonlysubterfuge Mon 08-Jul-13 14:47:21

It's the heat, my DD has been on and off the boob all day. Pointing at my chest and shooting Boob!, at least I can say No sometimes and she goes back to her toys. Glad I do not have a newborn in all this heat.

SummerMyArse Mon 08-Jul-13 14:50:35

DS is 21 months and politely resists all attempts to get him to stop

"Have you finished? / do you want some water / shall we stop now?" - slightly opens mouth to mumble matter-of-factly "no" (his only word!) then clamps down again.

Most irritating now is that he also performs gymnastics whilst feeding, practically standing up on my legs, or walking his legs up the back of the sofa...

I really wish he'd self-wean!!! But I can't say no yet because he gets so excited when it's time for a feed (evenings only)

DS 2.6, exactly the same. Again, all ready with guns blazing "YABVVVVVU!!!!" but no, you're not, SHE is! I don't think the heat helps (had to have him sleeping in my room last night as his window is annoyingly just the right height for him to climb out and doesn't have restrictors for when it's open). Sharing a bed is just too much temptation for him, I kept waking up with him having stealth latched! My boobs today in my strapless maxi dress = very unfortunate for anyone who ventures to glance. sad

LRDLearningKnigaBook Mon 08-Jul-13 15:20:02


There was a woman on the bus this afternoon - was it you?! I doubt it as her baby looked younger than that to me. She'd started off with plenty of polite 'now stop pulling mummy's hair ... now, stop pulling ... now, stop!... OUCH!'. The baby had a big chunk of it and she clearly didn't want to wrestle with him (her?) in front of everyone.

I promise my smile was meant to be all supportive. grin

TanglednotTamed Mon 08-Jul-13 15:28:39

I must admit the thread title was intended to fire you all up a bit in case it's hard to summon the energy to click on threads in this heat.

DD has gone off with Grandma now. I need a drink. My fluid levels must be at drought level.

notsochic Mon 08-Jul-13 15:33:46

Ha I too came on to be all fired up but am nodding nodding nodding as DC2 12 weeks keeps a watchful eye on the proximity of my nipple while pretending to be asleep smile

LookingForwardToMarch Mon 08-Jul-13 15:34:00


It's not just my dd that has some sort of internal nipple gps tracking system?!

VikingVagine Mon 08-Jul-13 15:37:39

I came here with a whole packet full of biscuit for you!

BlackeyedSusan Mon 08-Jul-13 15:55:17

nice op. another one sucked in.

ds used to wriggle and shift position. he was quite into the standing on one leg and putting the other in the air. the tuning over and trying to take the nipple the long way round was the worst.

clamping down and bit fingers do not sound fun.

BlackeyedSusan Mon 08-Jul-13 15:58:01

turning over

scrumpkin Mon 08-Jul-13 16:02:21

I threaten ds (2) that mummy's boobies are going in the bin or that they're broken. Never works confused

TanglednotTamed Mon 08-Jul-13 16:04:45

Are they chocolate bourbons, Viking? I'll take them anyway if so smile

DD tried to climb over me in bed last night, without unlatching. That is against all sorts of physics and biology, FGS.

VikingVagine Mon 08-Jul-13 16:11:20

They are home made chocolate chip and walnut cookies. Still interested grin ?

MissStrawberry Mon 08-Jul-13 16:14:34

Thank goodness this isn't the thread I thought it was going to be!!

Now, OPs DD, behave!!

MousyMouse Mon 08-Jul-13 16:15:22

blackeye oh yes, remember very well the 'flamingo' and 'radio tuning' on the other nipple.

MousyMouse Mon 08-Jul-13 16:15:52

oh, op, you are nbu at all

beginnings Mon 08-Jul-13 16:18:10

Do you know what you all need to do? Get pregnant again. I knew DC2 was most surprisingly on the way (DD took a lot of work, DC2....Emm...didn't) when DD started looking at me as if you say, you taste funny. And then just stopped!


WaitingForMe Mon 08-Jul-13 16:20:25

DS is nearly 8mths and last week had 3-5 feeds a day. Suddenly it's like having a newborn again. Except that he now twists and looks around while kicking his legs happily. He will take water from DH but only if he can't see me.

Ergo I keep hiding from my baby blush

Lweji Mon 08-Jul-13 16:21:46

YABVU to stop someone's meal halfway through. wink

Celador Mon 08-Jul-13 18:10:01

It's great to know it isn't just DS that's like this (new mum, I know nothing).

He's finally fallen asleep face down between my boobs. DH calls it 'marking his territory'.

MrsHoarder Mon 08-Jul-13 18:18:55


Can still unlatch ds with a finger so long add I'm quick, but he screams blue murder and pulls my top down. Suspect I won't get away with that much longer either.

iamadoozermum Mon 08-Jul-13 18:22:31

My DD is also refusing to stay asleep if I dare unlatch. She is also trying the pulling with her gums (she's teething her first front teeth), then biting down real hard at the end of the nipple. I am not impressed!

SmiteYouWithThunderbolts Mon 08-Jul-13 18:22:54

YANBU, it's SO RUDE <looks at ds>

It's too hot to have a sweaty, wriggly 14 month old climbing all over my chest, sticking his feet in my face and pinching my arms.

Oh lordy, here he comes again....!

Alibabaandthe40nappies Mon 08-Jul-13 18:24:30

I was all ready to be furious - but YANBU!

<eyes hot sweaty wrestle two year old>

YANBU. DS2 will refuse to unlatch and start humming so he can't hear me. He hums Food, Glorious Food.

ChunkyPickle Mon 08-Jul-13 18:30:51

DS (nearly 3) was forced to give up when I got pregnant again and the milk dried up.. but he's still obsessed with them ('your bouncies are GRREEAAAT'), and if miffed for some reason will only fall/stay asleep with one hand possessively draped on one or shoved down my top.

I have a horrible impression that when the new baby comes he's going to be expecting to have a go again..

Mind you the other day I was straight out of the shower sending an urgent message and he attacked them by licking, so it might be that he's forgotten what he's supposed to do with them anyhow.

Booboostoo Mon 08-Jul-13 18:31:32

Fantastic thread OP!

DD is 2yo and will only unlatch if I tell her the cat needs feeding...needless to say the cat is getting fat!

DorothyMantooth Mon 08-Jul-13 18:36:13

Argh! DD (15 wks) has got into a really annoying habit of pretending she wants to feed, then as soon as I'm ready to go turning her head and sucking her thumb whilst rubbing my nipple aggressively. If I dare try to protect poor nipples from her neglectfully long claws all hell breaks loose. This happens about 5 times a day at the moment, please say it's the weather!

Llareggub Mon 08-Jul-13 18:38:03

DS is 4. I'm so over breastfeeding but he loves it. He said he might think about giving up at Christmas. Pah.

maternitart Mon 08-Jul-13 19:08:12

Another "trying to find my favourite pirate station on a transistor radio" nipple twiddler baby here. Other times he grabs it and twists like it's the stiff lid on a jar of pickles.

Worse though is that he bites me hard and seems to find it entertaining when I shout OW or say NO.

Burmobasher Mon 08-Jul-13 19:23:48

Yep, having one of those days too. Dd has two modes today feeding or crying for food!

MooseBeTimeForSpring Mon 08-Jul-13 20:25:23

My DH wants to know when he can have them back grin

BonaDea Mon 08-Jul-13 20:30:31

Does everyone have an 'unlatch' word or phrase they use?! I just stick my finger in but I guess it would be fair for DS to get some chance to finish off on his own.

Any suggestions??

CatsRule Mon 08-Jul-13 20:33:46

I'm glad I'm not the only one.being abused by a baby!

My ds is 16 months and the master at head twisting...feels just lovely that does...doesn't hurt at all either!!

<wonders when I can have my own boobs back>

ZingWidge Mon 08-Jul-13 20:54:28

OP, this must be the sweetest AIBU thread starter ever! smile

TanglednotTamed Mon 08-Jul-13 21:37:51

BonaDea - suggestions for an unlatch phrase. I think that could be a whole new thread - but, I proffer

'AAARRRRGH! PLEEEEEEAASSSE OPEN UP!' (DD has this strange jaw-clamp thing she does about 2 minutes after she falls asleep - I have a very short window to retrieve my nipple - too soon, and she wakes up, too late, and I am screaming, trying not to swear (DSs are in the next room), and frantically tugging at her jaw.

Bringmewineandcake Mon 08-Jul-13 23:10:40

My 8 month old dd has taken to grabbing my nipple and pulling it into her mouth then sucking whilst still holding it....unnecessary!!
And YY to pinching my arms! Why do they do that?? I'm tired of saying "ouch! That hurts mummy" and being ignored...

FirstVix Mon 08-Jul-13 23:46:20

Ooo I have this too atm. My personal new 'favourite' thing that DD (2yo) does is stretching the other nipple with one hand and 'twanging' it like a guitar with the other. The saddest thing is that it took me soooo long to work out what she was doing - no WONDER I was going OWwwww! How desensitised must I be?! I also personally LOVE that I don't need oxygen and, yes, of COURSE my neck is the best place to put your elbow during the baby gymnastics feeding sessions.

My best current strategy for delatching is either having an alarm go off (usually related to the bath) or counting down from ten after a time limit warning. These seem to have gone out the window since it got hot though!

(Loved the 'nipples in socks' comment!!)

Signet2012 Mon 08-Jul-13 23:53:01

10 month old dd id the same. I feed her to sleep, she is most definitely asleep, arm drop test yup asleep.

Remove nipple from mouth and eyebrows shoot upwards and eyes shoot open and she looks at me with pure disgust on her face before wailing.


FirstVix Tue 09-Jul-13 00:05:50

Actually, I've just remembered the best 'nipple GPS' thing (loved that too - making me feel sooo like I'm not alone!) - DD's asleep, definitely asleep, arm drop, everything...yet.. I move slightly...she shuffles (boob in range/back in mouth)..I shift slightly....she crawls on me...It's like a synchronous dance that I can't win.


DD2 hasn't thought of biting my unlatching finger yet. It can only be a matter of time...

BlackeyedSusan Tue 09-Jul-13 00:15:24

from a few months old, they were told no and put down if they bit. worked with dd.

i came back to say how impressed I was that you managed to think of a catch in the title in the heat.

Confused40 Tue 09-Jul-13 00:30:33

Ahh this post has made me smile and say uh huh my dd does that! I've spent most of the day bf and she'll fall asleep and I'll slowly ease breast out if mouth and she'll wake up again. Hilarious reading about being scared to move as this was me today several times. She's now sleeping soundly after taking several hours to settle and one cotton sheet cut up to swaddle and not be too hot for her lol smilesmile

Shylepite Tue 09-Jul-13 00:50:27

grin I came on here ready to tell you yabu in a not very polite way before I read your op!

My dd has been doing that all day too

maternitart Tue 09-Jul-13 08:06:35

I told my DS' teeth to fuck off last night... blush

In my defence it was 4am and he was biting the nipple still sore from the previous biting frenzy feed.

TanglednotTamed Tue 09-Jul-13 13:13:42

I am totally anti-swearing around my DC. But one night, I screamed 'FUUUCK!' as DD clamped her teeth into my nipple and wouldn't let go. Fortunately the DSs were asleep. DH got a shock when that was bellowed out of the monitor downstairs, though grin

Booboostoo Wed 10-Jul-13 16:27:55

TangledNotTamed my DD has the same jaw clamp! I have to get the timing just right, unlatch too early and she wakes up again, unlatch too late and she's biting/clamped down for the night!

WitchOfEndor Wed 10-Jul-13 16:35:56

I sympathise wholeheartedly, DS is 3 and still likes to feed to sleep for his daytime nap which is usually for 2 hours. I sit there with the remote, iPad and snacks (no drinks as my bladder won't last for 2 hours). He has picked up a virus which means he wants even more comfort so after his nap he will refuse to unlatch, with full head shake. I've tried promising biscuits, cucumber etc and in the end try to make him laugh by tickling him off. I can't wait till he drops his daytime nap ( although it does give me 2 hours to catch up on the telly)

FridaKarlov Wed 10-Jul-13 18:49:25

Mine's just cutting her first tooth and has discovered biting sad

I managed to wean my boy at 19 months, he was NOT happy!

He still likes to hold my boob when we have a sleepy cuddle and I'm sure if I let him he would latch on! He used to like creeping up to me and latching onto my boob as I sat there after a shower. grin

JesusInTheCabbageVan Wed 10-Jul-13 19:13:41

This morning DS decided to see if he could breastfeed whilst vigorously chewing a mouthful of toast. My toes are still curled.

IfIonlyhadsomesleep Wed 10-Jul-13 19:38:36

Yanbu, op! And just for good measure, dd2, it's also bad manners to lie down for milk and say firmly "no tuddles, no tisses, milk, mummy". It's so all about you and your mispronounced c's! But, I will so miss this when you're done with it all. Worth mastitis (twice) and severely bitten bits (just).

TanglednotTamed Thu 11-Jul-13 09:23:09

DD woke up in the night and wanted milk. After what felt like an endless sleepy feed, I detached her, and she erupted in fury. I patted her back and said, 'Mummy loves you.' She turned away and sternly said, 'I aren't talking to you.' That was me told!

But 5 minutes later she draped herself over my face and sang 'Jingle Bells' all the way through eleventy million times, so I think she got over it.

SummerMyArse Thu 11-Jul-13 10:30:29

Since the heat DS (21 months) has been trying to re-introduce BF in the morning (it's been evening only feeds since he was about 13 months - his choice!). Motivates me to get up in the morning!

Am starting TTC number 2 soon - was hoping to stop BF before getting pregnant but maybe getting pregnant will change the taste and DS will stop voluntarily...

He also sticks his hand down my top for reassurance when hurt/upset/tired etc. but he does that to DH and my parents too grin

Doingakatereddy Thu 11-Jul-13 10:54:30

There's nothing in for dinner, toddler needs picking up at -pm, downstairs needs a good Hoover, I've got a hundred things to do - but my 14 week old DD is fast asleep with protective little hand holding my boob to her mouth while she sleeps.

I'm not moving, this is what I'm meant to do - just lie here and comfort her smile

FriendofDorothy Thu 11-Jul-13 11:16:20

This thread has made me smile all morning.

Sleep404 Thu 11-Jul-13 12:57:55

DS currently screaming his head off for this very reason. So rude.

Then there's the grab and twist of my no longer buoyant breast while clamping down with those sharp things you call teeth, ds.

beginnings Thu 11-Jul-13 14:01:39

Ah Doingakatereddy you've just brought back happy memories. At about that age, DD used to feed and then fall alseep with her arm draped protectively over my boob smile I used to love it.

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