To be furious at poor hygiene

(83 Posts)
PenguinBear Sat 06-Jul-13 18:59:44

We are at a BBQ hosted by another family and he has just put the meat on the BBQ. He touched all the raw meat with his hands and has since poured the wine, touched the chair and then his face! I am a tad very neurotic about raw meat after a horrendous food poisoning incident while camping as a teen. 

I don't feel I can eat anything or let the dc go near anything. What do I do? I feel v stressed ( I knows it's an over reaction) but what do I do?

EliotNess Sat 06-Jul-13 19:00:09

You're being obsessive

Shitsinger Sat 06-Jul-13 19:01:57

ugh grim !
I would go home but I don't do Barbeques for this very reason!

GetStuffezd Sat 06-Jul-13 19:02:00

Agree with Eliot

minibmw2010 Sat 06-Jul-13 19:02:22

It's not great but I thought the risk was raw chicken, not raw meat as such?

Preciousbane Sat 06-Jul-13 19:02:46

The meat will be cooked, just don't lick his face or the chair

maternitart Sat 06-Jul-13 19:03:13

If the meat is cooked through, you'll be fine eating it.

"Jokingly" say "aren't you going to wash your hands after touching all that raw meat, we'll all be puking tonight if you're not careful!"

This is one of the reasons I'm glad I'm veggie! hope it's not chicken, campylobacter is horrid

FruitSaladIsNotPudding Sat 06-Jul-13 19:03:45

I'd be a bit concerned if it were chicken, less so other meats.

Just have plenty of wine. It'll kill the bacteria. Or you won't care anymore.

Isn't it a bit rude MNetting at a BBQ. You should be mingling, and chatting.

If you hadn't been watching him you would never have known. as long as the meat is well cooked you will be fine. Don't stress and try and enjoy yourself.

valiumredhead Sat 06-Jul-13 19:05:20

Add long as the meat is cooked through and he's not chipping salad with same knife as the meat you'll be fine. You'd be horrified of you saw what went on in a professional kitchen if you think that's badgrin

valiumredhead Sat 06-Jul-13 19:05:48


EvieanneVolvic Sat 06-Jul-13 19:05:59

Sweet jesus how do some people even get up in the morning???

And absolutely what Sparkling said...where are your manners??

Make yourself a big sandwich with all the salad/coleslaw. But check for flies in it first.

tripecity Sat 06-Jul-13 19:06:31

Ask him to wash his hands - and dont even do it jokingly, I wouldnt. Thats horrid, I'm not surprised you arent happy!

tiggytape Sat 06-Jul-13 19:06:47

I don't think that's obsessive. Epecially if it is chicken or minced products like burgers and especially if he is touching other things that will be eaten (or drank) without being cooked.
It depends whether this was on the way indoors to wash his hands or whether all the food will be touched by someone handling raw meat.

CaptainJamesTKirk Sat 06-Jul-13 19:07:30

What preciousbane said.

EvieanneVolvic Sat 06-Jul-13 19:07:57

Ask him to wash his hands - and don't even do it jokingly

and this will have the added benefit of making sure you're never invited again!

Poor Man. he lays on a BBQ and everyone is watching him cook and ewwwing.

I wouldn't like it but then I hate touching raw meat and always wash my hands straight after, I did a food hygiene course for work many moons ago so I am always thinking 'cross contamination!' - that was the answer to most of the questions grin

What if he touches the buns next without washing his hands...surely that will leave some raw meatiness ?!

CaptainJamesTKirk Sat 06-Jul-13 19:08:59

And sparkling is right, you're at a BBQ as a guest. Get off your phone and stop MNing!

Sparkling, are you hosting a BBQ right about now? grin

EvieanneVolvic Sat 06-Jul-13 19:11:21

Not everyone Sparkling, just the OP! Who was probably so engrossed with her MNing that she didn't see him slather antibac all over the place!

No Sugar. grin

I feel sorry for BBQ man TBH.

EvieanneVolvic Sat 06-Jul-13 19:12:31

What if he touches the buns next without washing his hands

Wine through my nose...for a moment I thought you meant an entirely different kind of bun in which case raw meat traces would be the least of it!! grin

LynetteScavo Sat 06-Jul-13 19:15:32

You are posting this while at someones BBQ? grin shock Isn't that a bit.....rude?

I hate BBQ's full stop. I expect to be served chicken which is raw in the middle, and burnt on the outside. Which is why I only partake in the wine and puddings.

TSSDNCOP Sat 06-Jul-13 19:15:39

If he touched the meat and had washed his hands first I can't see the problem. It's not like you've got to eat the wine bottle.

wine and unclench.

I did think about putting 'barms' but thought no one would know what I meant, so it was a toss up between rolls and buns grin and the buns won.

Disclaimer, this decision making process took a nano second, I wasn't agonising over it!

EvieanneVolvic Sat 06-Jul-13 19:17:20

grin sugar

Wallison Sat 06-Jul-13 19:21:28

I don't think yabu at all, penguin, and I'm sure that pretty soon the part of his face that he touched will go all green and manky and fall off into the barbeque and then they won't be hassling you for being anal, will they?

Yorkie1990 Sat 06-Jul-13 19:23:55

I'm making love to my OH right now, he just farted, do I carry on or is this bad form on his part?

Wallison Sat 06-Jul-13 19:28:06

Best cut his arse off, just to be sure.

And then wash your hands.

EvieanneVolvic Sat 06-Jul-13 19:30:14

I think Wallison's suggestion is bang on the money.

However if you want a less messy solution I (seriously) suggest you feign the illness you seem convinced you are going to get (so hardly lying at all) and leave before eating.

It never occurred to me to studiously watch the host cook when invited to their home for food.

Report him to Food Hygiene and get him shut down?

EvieanneVolvic Sat 06-Jul-13 19:31:58

I'm making love to my OH right now, he just farted, do I carry on or is this bad form on his part?

Clearly I have been on MN for way too long (albeit with different names) because I can entirely see the relevance of this, at first glance, wholly random post to the thread!

FuzzyWuzzywasaWoman Sat 06-Jul-13 19:33:39

Start singing "When will I see you, again" as he serves you your burger.

Hanginggardenofboobylon Sat 06-Jul-13 19:39:39

Have you ever been to a 'traditional' type butchers?! I think you would keel over on the spot, raw meat contaminated credit card anyone?!

I used to work on the till in a bank. The butcher regularly paid in notes covered in blobs of meat.

At our local butchers where I grew up he had an Alsatian behind the counter who licked his hands between customers. <iron bowels>

RubyThePirate Sat 06-Jul-13 19:45:08

Lick his face.

It will be therapeutic.

BlessedDespair Sat 06-Jul-13 20:44:58

Eeewwww raw meat esp. chicken and pork are very bad for you.

All it takes is for you to touch the chair after him and then touch your mouth and you risk illness.

<admits to being very hygiene conscious with food prep and cooking. Will not admit to how many times hands and utensils get washed while cooking>

TheOneAndOnlyReality Sat 06-Jul-13 21:37:49

How do people go through life like this?


pointythings Sat 06-Jul-13 21:58:28

I have to say when doing BBQ we are scrupulous about hand and other hygiene. It's just common sense. DH is American so BBQ is part of his culture, and it's just a part of his routine. You'd probably be OK with the wine though, but I wouldn't be happy if he were handling salads.

BackforGood Sat 06-Jul-13 22:05:05

1. You need to unclench

2. You need to have a serious look at your manners - someone invites you to their home for a party / BBQ / social evening and you get your phone out and start MNing shock. How incredibly rude.

PenguinBear Sat 06-Jul-13 22:35:10

I was alone in the garden supervising all the dc (theirs and ours) in the pool. I wasn't being anti social, there was no-one to chat to at the time!

PenguinBear Sat 06-Jul-13 22:47:32

Also, to those that said I was watching him so closely, he was quite far away and probably didn't know I was looking!

aliasjoey Sat 06-Jul-13 22:47:42

Just asked DH about BBQ we had tonight. He said he used tongs not fingers to handle meat <smug>

I then pointed out he used the same tongs to handle the cooked meat <no longer smug>

He is defiant, though, and says cross-contamination very unlikely.

Jan49 Sat 06-Jul-13 22:48:06

I think the person most at risk is him, the man that handled the raw meat, because he's got it on his hands and is likely to touch his face and eyes, whereas someone else would have to touch something exactly where he did in order to be at risk.

Someone I know ran a restaurant (not in the UK) and was careless about food hygiene, specifically about handling raw meat. He suffered permanent eye damage. I think it was Toxoplasmosis.

katykuns Sun 07-Jul-13 00:26:27

furious? really?

OhDearNigel Sun 07-Jul-13 00:57:31

I assume he's not a chef and therefore has no clue about cross contamination or food safety.

If you want your food to be prepared with scrupulous attention to food hygiene don't go to a friend's house. Or a restaurant for that matter.

BOF Sun 07-Jul-13 01:03:24

I can just about get why you are bothered by him touching your wine glass, if it was at the rim. Even then, fresh raw meat is unlikely to make you ill.

I fail to see though, why it bothers you that he then went on to touch chairs and his face. You wouldn't be licking either, I presume?

Turniptwirl Sun 07-Jul-13 01:03:37


Who thinks its ok to spread raw meat bacteria over everything including things which won't be cooked (which would kill the bacteria)?

Hope he gets food poisoning

valiumredhead Sun 07-Jul-13 08:18:46

Alias-I have 2 separate tongsgrin

MadeOfStarDust Sun 07-Jul-13 08:48:05

We also have 2 separate tongs - the usual big BBQ ones for cooking the raw meat, then kitchen ones for serving cooked meat - the long BBQ ones have insulated handles so you can leave the metal bits that touch the raw/part-cooked food on the hot BBQ....

I don't tend to eat food others have cooked on a BBQ anyhow - MIL used to marinate the chicken overnight in her (hot) kitchen - out of the fridge to get "more flavour" - kind of put me off...

You suffering yet OP? Or did it all work out alright in the end?

FWIW you could rub a raw chicken breast all over my wine glass and i'd still drink it.

EliotNess Sun 07-Jul-13 08:57:07

Mumsnetters are a joyless lot

I am going to a fete today. I will be watching like a hawk to see if the people serving the cake are following hygiene regulations. wink

shock sparkling whatever you don't let them handle your buns after touching money. Just remember, there's faecal matter on all money!

DoodleAlley Sun 07-Jul-13 09:18:40

We got campylobacter last year. Reading up on how easily that is caught was enlightening.

OMG ABF pooey Lemon Drizzle cake. sad

In the Dominican Republic they keep their money in their socks. confused

fairylightsinthespring Sun 07-Jul-13 09:54:35

raw meat is not inherently dangerous, you can eat raw meat, even chicken actually and it won't make you ill UNLESS there is something wrong with it in the first place. You're far more likely to be ill from eating mayo or the cooked food that has been left out in the sun for too long.

YY fairy I would be more worried about the Coleslaw left in the sun with Bluebottles pooing in it TBH.

MadeOfStarDust Sun 07-Jul-13 10:15:52

ooooohhhh yum <not> sparkling....

gobbledegook1 Sun 07-Jul-13 10:54:36

YANBU, I'm also religious about washing my hands straight after touching raw meat making sure not to touch other things this would get to me also.

LilacPeony Sun 07-Jul-13 11:20:54

I think it's odd not to want to wash your hands after handling raw meat

Gigondas Sun 07-Jul-13 11:26:10

I think you should take a clipboard sparkling and make notes of the food safety issues you see then pass on the notes you make.

miffybun73 Sun 07-Jul-13 11:36:45

YANBU, that's gross.

I really can't believe that anyone would put raw meat on the BBQ and then not go and immediately wash their hands in hot soapy water. It's really not that difficult is it?!

I am back Gigondas. Tongs and gloves were worn. Someone else took the money. All cakes covered in between slices being cut. Humph.

RoooneyMara Sun 07-Jul-13 15:13:09

I think you're all being very cruel to the OP.

It is minging to touch anything after handling raw meat.

No, she won't be licking the chairs but she might touch the chair he touched, and then her hands will have any bacteria that has been put on the chair, and the chair is presumably in the sun so it will be breeding away merrily.

I'd probably not eat anything that had been touched by someone else after being cooked. Or just, nothing. Then eat when I got home. Or steal some bread from their kitchen, instead.

JerseySpud Sun 07-Jul-13 15:23:19

I think some people are way too over the top. However did we all survive before the health and safety brigade came along...

nennypops Sun 07-Jul-13 15:34:38

You have heard of people eating rare steaks, right? How do you imagine they survive given that they're not only touching raw meat, they're eating it? YABU.

phantomnamechanger Sun 07-Jul-13 15:35:12

I'm frankly amazed that so many of you think this is OK and nowt to worry about - as others have said, the contact with raw meat then touching all sorts of other items, coupled with the heat is a recipe <pun intended> for disaster. Someone else can handle the wine bottle just before picking up their burger to eat, you don't expect a wine bottle to be covered in raw meat bacteria

However, I can't be the only one shock at the OP MNing when she * is supposed to be supervising kids in the pool*

phantomnamechanger Sun 07-Jul-13 15:37:04

raw steak or rare/medium is not the same as burger mince or chicken or pork outside on a hot day though, is it.

Dackyduddles Sun 07-Jul-13 15:40:27

You are supervising all kids by a POOL and you are on the phone, mning?!!!

Get off the thing now and pay some fecking attention.

Unless you lick his chair what's the issue?

EliotNess Sun 07-Jul-13 16:19:57

You don't have to STARE at kids to look after them. Really

LilacPeony Sun 07-Jul-13 16:43:21

I'm surprised so many people think there's no need to wash your hands after touching raw meat.

phantomnamechanger Sun 07-Jul-13 17:01:21

EN - maybe you have not read the threads on silent drowning?

For this reason I never let my children go to swimming parties - you do not know how well the adults supervising are doing their job - plenty of children have drowned at family BBQs/holiday homes etc where everyone thought someone else was watching the kids, the sun was out, everyone was in party mode, enjoying a few drinks, what could go wrong....

a quick look up now and then (from MNing etc) to check no one in the water appears to be panicking is NOT going to spot the child who is silently drowning, just out of their depth, and unable to shout for help or act distressed. Most children drown within sight of an adult.

Wallison Mon 08-Jul-13 09:28:12

What is the difference between eating mince and steak tartare?

shootthatfruit Mon 08-Jul-13 10:05:57

Mince and therefore steak tartare has any faecal bacteria like E. coli from the carcass mixed right through it so if it's not cooked through the bacteria are thriving.

Rare steaks have only the inside (where the faecal material won't be) raw, the outside where they might be bas been cooked.

OP YANBU. I'm shocked that people think basic food hygiene round raw meat counts as being fussy - it's basic and I'm amazed at anyone who's comfortable handling raw meat and not washing their hands. Never mind people who do that where they're serving food to other people. It's either selfish and lazy, or it shows really embarrassing ignorance of how food poisoning works.

It's takes a scarily tiny number of individual bacteria for E. coli to make someone ill (you don't need it to have been multiplying in warm food for hours first) and if it's a child under five or an elderly person they can die from it. I'd honestly be more comfortable drinking from a glass my host's child had just wiped bogies all over the outside of, than one my host handed to me straight after handling raw burgers. (Obviously I'd prefer neither, but if I had to choose...)

If there is anyone out there who's a bit vague on food safety and bbqs it would be worth them reading this:

Wallison Mon 08-Jul-13 11:30:42

Yes but steak tartare isn't cooked.

Thatballwasin Mon 08-Jul-13 14:12:45

No, you're being entirely reasonable, that's absolutely grim and I'm very surprised so many people seem to have no problem with this.

The trad butchers near me has a glass booth where a cashier sits, she doesn't handle the meat and the butchers don't handle the money. It's not a posh butchers.

Thatballwasin Mon 08-Jul-13 14:39:58

Remind me never to attend a MN barbecue......

Crinkle77 Mon 08-Jul-13 14:46:32

I don't think you are obsessive either. What if he then goes and touches cooked food, salad or buns? I have to tell my fella to wash his hands after touching raw meat cos he doesn't either, then goes and touches the bread. yuck!

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