To be VERY annoyed with noise kids are making outside

(80 Posts)
HoppinMad Tue 18-Jun-13 20:31:23

I wish I could open the window and scream about the bloody racket. But they're kids so I wont.
Argh the level of screaming, shouting, swearing and loud laughter is getting on my nerves, it has taken me over an hour to settle dc. The baby fell asleep after about half an hour, but toddler is a very light sleeper and despite being shattered from a half day at nursery and various activities just couldn't settle because of the sheer noise.

We live in a quiet cul-de-sac with mainly young families. It is generally the same two or three families that allow their feral dc (ranging from early teens to about two or three years) to be out till very late, and allow them to make all the noise they like disturbing all the other neighbours. Its only since late spring, summer started to be fair, but its beginning to piss me off. I have wasted an hour, when normally it takes 15 minutes max. Kitchens a tip which I promised myself to clean but now I am too tired so dh can do it when he gets home from work

But seriously aibu to think people really should have some consideration for others who have children? I really dont care what time they put their dc to bed, but why allow them to be out till so late and make so much noise. Grrr... They are still at it.

MiaowTheCat Tue 18-Jun-13 20:34:52

Yep we get it too - the bit that winds me up (apart from the fact our car got landed with a good couple of hundred pounds repair bill from one little cherub grabbing the door handle and swinging back on it) is that their mum's told them not to play outside their own house as the noise disturbs her - so we have them further along the street outside OUR house instead.

It unsettles DD1 quite a lot when the noise is particularly bad - which it will be now until autumn, and then again when the snow appears.

MrsLouisTheroux Tue 18-Jun-13 20:36:47

It's 8.30pm and too late to be out IMHO so YANBU.

wigglesrock Tue 18-Jun-13 20:38:30

Swings and roundabouts - did your baby ever cry through the night?, what about night shift workers who sleep during the day - when would you like kids to play outside?

Thurlow Tue 18-Jun-13 20:40:24

YANBU. I'm sure people will come along and say "oh, they're kids, you can't complain and your kids will be doing the same thing" but most parents know there is a reasonable cut off point. 7 on a school night, 8 on a Friday or Saturday.

SodaStreamy Tue 18-Jun-13 20:41:55

I know it's annoying but if it's the older ones out playing I think that's just part of life. I think it's better they are out interacting with each other than being welded to a pc/gaming device in their bedroom.

There'd be no harm though in asking them to keep it down or move further away, they children won't be thinking about potential sleeping babies

cardibach Tue 18-Jun-13 20:44:03

MrsLouisTheroux 8.30 is not too late for teenagers to be socialising - in the winter they will do it inside somewhere, in the summer outside. It is unreasonable of them to make a noise loud enough to disturb people in their homes, though.

Mintyy Tue 18-Jun-13 20:44:50

As the parent of older children I say yanbu. I think its fine to ask children to come inside or stop making a noise at 8pm, in a built up residential area, even if it is the height of summer.

themightyfandango Tue 18-Jun-13 20:50:01

YABabitU.

You may well be my neighbour, I have three noisy boys 12, 9, 6. I have just brought them inside at 8'30pm. I am aware they are noisy but after being cooped in most of the year the fresh air and exercise is good for them. Otherwise they would be playing xbox and vegetating which would also have people hoiking their judgypants.

I remember when eldest DS was a baby I would get annoyed for the same reasons by the teenager opposite revving his motorbike. Mine are older now and are the noise culprits and I guess one day yours will be too.

Not much you can do unless you can afford a gated mansion or are prepared to live in the middle of nowhere.

I do have sympathy though, frustrating when you are a sleep deprived new mum.

HoppinMad Tue 18-Jun-13 20:50:34

Wriggles what has a crying baby got to do with it? Luckily my neighbours cannot hear us and vice versa, but even if they could, I would NOT allow the baby to cry endlessly and do my utmost to quieten him. And of course apologizing profusely in the morning. Unlike the parents of the noisy kids outside who clearly dont give a shit.

Kids have plenty of time during the day to play outside, even those in full time education have around four hours. 7pm is bedtime for the average young child, and they should not be disturbed by its selfish twunts who cannot say no to their dc, or shoo them outside so they can put their feet up and have a cuppa/watch the soaps/have a quick shag/ whatever else hmm

valiumredhead Tue 18-Jun-13 20:52:09

If they are right outside your house what's stopping you asking then to keep the noise down as you are trying to settle the baby?

Sirzy Tue 18-Jun-13 20:52:37

People complain that children aren't out getting enough fresh air/are spending too long infront of computers then they complain when teens are outside at 8.30. They can't win!

HoppinMad Tue 18-Jun-13 20:55:36

The mighty I understand, its not easy to keep older children indoors but surely they can be told not to make so much noise? Its the screaming and shouting and banging. And if the warning is ignored then bring them in.

Fwiw we have a small park literally next to cul-de-sac, surely they can go there if they are so desperate to play outside till the sun goes down.

maddening Tue 18-Jun-13 20:55:37

Fair enough dc have the right to be outside but if your dc are loud the parents should go out and tell them to keep it down.

HoppinMad Tue 18-Jun-13 21:00:12

Valium they aren't outside my house, they seem to generally play all down the quiet road, but I have been biting my tongue because I dont want to get on the wrong side of all the neighbours involved. Not been too long since we moved and dont know them very well, making friends will probably be out of the question if I start complaining. But you are right, I will have to say something if it carries on.

ParadiseChick Tue 18-Jun-13 21:03:42

I just cannot get pissed off with kids playing and enjoying themselves.

Yabu for referring to them as feral.

BellaVita Tue 18-Jun-13 21:07:37

It isn't their fault you have a baby really is it?

When your baby is old enough to play outside I bet you will forget about the moaning you did about other children playing out.

It is summer, light nights, it doesn't last for long.

<sheesh>

burberryqueen Tue 18-Jun-13 21:07:45

was visiting a friend the other night and there were some children running screaming and playing in his cul de sac and we both remarked that it was a good sound, a normal sound, so many parents are keeping their children in these days. Playing out does not make children 'feral'!

valiumredhead Tue 18-Jun-13 21:08:55

Of they aren't outside your house I think you are baying a kill joy. It'll be your kids out there playing before too long.

valiumredhead Tue 18-Jun-13 21:09:08

If not of

wigglesrock Tue 18-Jun-13 21:09:17

So they are not outside your house, just in the cul de sac and your children can't sleep because they're light sleepers.

Look it sounds like you've decided you are not the biggest fan of the family, I'm not sure what you can do about it.

The reasons I've mentioned babies crying is because I know especially with one of mine, there were a good few nights where she cried between 2 and 5am, just no amount of anything would soothe her. We live in -terraced housing, I think it's supposed to be called town houses these days smile and other peoples noise is part and parcel of living in a street.

From lawnmowers to engines running, buses going past, the 3 teenage boys next door thundering downstairs, dogs barking. It's just one of those things that occurs particularly when the weather is a bit better.

TimeofChange Tue 18-Jun-13 21:11:03

Can you children go to sleep with a calming bedtime music cd, that will cover up a lot of the outside noise?

Feelslikea1sttimer Tue 18-Jun-13 21:19:11

My teenagers (13&14) are still playing cricket on the front garden now, I ocassionally bob my head out of the window and tell them to keep it down, they are not swearing or shouting but there is laughter and the odd 'howzat' but hey I'm not gonna keep them in all night although if someone did say they were keeping a baby or toddler awake I'd make them come in, I'm not going to bring them in 'just in case!'

YABU speak to them calmly if its causing a problem.

HoppinMad Tue 18-Jun-13 21:21:51

Bella - and it isn't my fault they have noisy kids.

Btw the feral word was a bit of a joke hence the deletion line, its not the kids I am annoyed at to be honest, more the parents I think. Isn't it wrong to allow children as young as 2 or 3 to be out at this time, really? They have all just gone in now.

Valium and wriggles - not directly outside my house no, but they do play occasionally, anywhere in the cul-de-sac. I dont have a problem with it at all in the day, its just after 7.30 pm really. They can play after that too if they could stop with the shrieking and shouting.

Also when my dc are older, I believe I would still have some consideration for others with young children, and hope to instill that in my dc also.

MaybeBentley Tue 18-Jun-13 21:25:00

Just a little echo of the screaming child in the café thread that ran and ran... Who's rights over-ride the others?

HoppinMad Tue 18-Jun-13 21:27:07

Timeofchange - I did try white noise when they ds was little but didn't really like it, and wanted the room quiet which worked.

I am calmer now, and can see I was being a bit OTT with wanting to scream out the window etc blush but a grumpy toddler and a teething baby cause frazzled nerves by evening and its hard when all I want is them to sleep so I can have rest myself.

wigglesrock Tue 18-Jun-13 21:38:16

Look, I've screamed at my husband for buttering bread too loudly when I've been trying to get mine to sleep smile

It's not that I'm not unsympathetic, it's just that I think it's a bit of a reach to try and stop noise in a street in the summer before 8.30pm. I hope you can get some sleep - feck the kitchen, it's not going anywhere.

Startail Tue 18-Jun-13 21:43:54

It's summer it's light. Noise up to 9pm is acceptable.
Notice after is not on a week night.

But I have a very non British attitude to toddler bed time.

I work in the when they are tired and have had enough fun clock, not the what will the neighbours think clock.

(Actually my neighbours will be drinking, swearing and enjoying the summer evenings in their non too quiet way too.)

BellaVita Tue 18-Jun-13 21:45:27

They are just being children though and when yours start to play out it will be the same.

We had children playing out in our little street tonight up until 9pm and some of them were small but playing with their older siblings. Just like mine used to play out at the front.

Tis life I'm afraid.

8:30 is too late for the little kids to be up and playing. And probably they are being noisy because they are over tired. But in general kids ought to be allowed to play outdoors. They need to show some consideration for others though, which the parents should help them to understand. All depends on how noisy they are being I think...

ChippingInWiredOnCoffee Tue 18-Jun-13 21:49:13

I'm glad you have calmed down a bit - we are all unreasonable at times smile

8.30 is still pretty early really. I think anything up to 9.30 is quite understandable on the few summer nights we actually get!

You'd hate Spain grin

MrsWolowitz Tue 18-Jun-13 21:54:25

YANBU.

Playing etc is fine. Screaming and swearing is not.

Dackyduddles Tue 18-Jun-13 22:03:18

Is it same 2-3 yr olds every night? I'm guessing a parent just in families enjoying light nights?

xylem8 Tue 18-Jun-13 22:09:18

yabu.8.30 isn't late for kids to be playing out on a nice summer evening. It is a reasonable time to be still making noise, you can't expect the world t stop for your kids

xylem8 Tue 18-Jun-13 22:11:55

and why shouldn't a 2 or 3 year old be playing at 8.30 why do theyneed to be up early?

carovioletfizz Tue 18-Jun-13 22:13:41

we get this too, to the point that we are moving. Can take up to three hours to settle our kids at night because of absolute racket outside from April onwards.

Well fuck me. Children out enjoying themselves on a summer's evening. Shoot the bastards.

Exactly. Move. To a nice detached house where you are not troubled by neighbours.

JakeBullet Tue 18-Jun-13 22:20:20

I get this too, and am also in a cul de sac. Same two orthree families who sit outside on the pavement and drink while laughing and chatting. Every other word is "fucking".
All the children are out there too listening to it all.

However, this evening they are all in the back garden and there has been a noisy conversation about a.complaint which has been made. Not by me I hasten to adf bit evidently someone is annoyed. On bad nights they.can go on until 5am

On the other hand they are friendly, good hearted and would help me in a heartbeat if I needed it so I tend to ignore the noise as much as possible.

MrsDeVere Tue 18-Jun-13 22:22:20

I live round a green (in a London borough, not a village)

Kids outside till dark in the summer

Sometimes it drives me bonkers but mostly it is just background noise.

If you are not trying to do something that requires quiet its not really going to bother you, if you are trying to get kids to sleep it is bound to pee you off.

The trouble is, the more annoyed you get , the louder and more unreasonable these things seem.

If it is really causing you distress you are going to have to have a word with the parents.

If you don't want to go that far your only other choice is to become all Zen about it. Or you will be in a constant state of stress through the summer until it no longer affects your DC's sleep pattern.

By then it will be your kids outside annoying people

Awomansworth Tue 18-Jun-13 22:25:54

If you don't like children making noise, why on earth did you move into a cul-de-sac full of mainly young families?

Ezza1 Tue 18-Jun-13 22:28:07

If someone would care to tell my 3 year old that 7pm is the average bedtime for little children, I would be most grateful.

He doesn't appear to listen to me.

Mintyy Tue 18-Jun-13 22:33:33

Presumably your 3 year old isn't outside screaming, shouting and swearing though Ezza?

Pmsl at this typically contrary Mumsnet stance - where it is unacceptable for pre-schoolers to make trampoliney type noises in their own gardens during the day, but perfectly fine for older kids to make as much noise as they like outside in the street until the sun goes down or beyond.

HoppinMad Tue 18-Jun-13 22:38:37

I am pretty surprised so many people think its ok for such young children to be playing out on a school night.

But anyway, like I said not my business what time folks decide to put their kids to bed but if it prevents my dc from sleeping then it kinda does become my business. As i mentioned I have absolutely no problem with them playing out, its the high level of noise. Surely any person with an ounce of common sense knows that many children will be going to/will be in bed by that time and ask their dc to keep it down? Its the considerate and responsible thing to do as an adult who has probably been through the baby/toddler stage and understands how tough it us.

xylem8 Tue 18-Jun-13 22:47:13

HoPPINGMAD-toddlers don't go to school.

xylem8 Tue 18-Jun-13 22:49:53

alsoo by the time op posted she had already spent an hour trying to get them to sleep, so she is actually asking for kids to not play out after 7

ChippingInWiredOnCoffee Tue 18-Jun-13 22:54:45

Mintyy - I think MN is so big these days you just get a lot of different replies - often depending on what time of day you post grin

I am not at all contrary - I'm pretty good with most 'kid' noise day or night!! Anyone who object to kids out playing needs to take a good long look at themselves IMO!

HoppinMad Tue 18-Jun-13 22:56:10

I am not just speaking of the 2 year olds, the group of kids are as I mentioned earlier, ranging from early teens to toddlers. My local nursery takes three year olds full time FYI, my ds will be going after the summer holidays full time.
My dsil is a teacher, was once saying how so many young kids cannot concentrate in class and are falling asleep at the desk. Well its clear video games aren't the only things to blame keeping them from having their full rest and sleeping on time.

Tilly333 Tue 18-Jun-13 22:57:03

I had this too. My house is next to a bus stop and we have a wall which the local 'youths' like to congregate on, shouting, swearing and screaming at each other. So one night, I decided to come out of my house, and go up the drive and actually asked one of them to 'budge up' to make room for me on my wall. I did not say anything, just sat and listened to their conversation. It took around 4 minutes for them to realise that I was a mad woman and move on. If you can't beat them join them...!

HoppinMad Tue 18-Jun-13 23:00:22

Xylem it was 7.15 if you want to be really precise, and where the heck did I say I dont want them playing out. Its the noise levels. Please read carefully before posting

ChippingInWiredOnCoffee Tue 18-Jun-13 23:03:23

Hoppin they aren't my children, so it's none of my business. As a rule, you can't go wrong far wrong with that line of thinking (unless there are signs of abuse of course).

... and no, it doesn't become your business when they go to bed just because you can't settle your children. That's life in a built up area.

ChippingInWiredOnCoffee Tue 18-Jun-13 23:05:54

Tilly grin FAB. I might just use that one for the kids who stand and smoke outside my place - I'll ask for a cig off of them too. Do you think it would be abundantly clear I have never smoked a cig in my life??

HoppinMad Tue 18-Jun-13 23:06:24

Tilly thats a great idea I might try that tomorrow. Run from one end of the cul de sac to the other screaming and jumping with the little darlings, dh may feel inclined to call the men in white coats if he sees me grin

Iamsparklyknickers Tue 18-Jun-13 23:07:16

Fwiw I agree with the OP. For context I live in a cul-de-sac between a park complete with skateboard ramp, and a primary school.

Kids playing is a nice enough noise - kids swearing, screeching/screaming, using your car as a goal post and running through your front garden isn't. The only problem I have is a couple of the neighbours kids who you can either hear the 'thump' of their basketball or their earsplitting screaming competitions from anywhere in the house. Oh and the ones who pop out from behind your porch when they're playing hide and seek.

I don't think anyone is saying kids should be tied to their beds, just wondering why you wouldn't tell them to play appropriately that close to peoples houses. Kids aren't stupid, they understand instructions and the difference between a park and a back garden. How else are they supposed to learn how to behave and when? I have to say, the fact the kids can be heard swearing from the end of the street doesn't give me much hope in approaching the parents. There's no way they haven't heard it and just let it go.

I can only presume some people have never had a bunch of kids like that practically under their window. Lucky buggers.

AnnaFiveTowns Tue 18-Jun-13 23:15:14

How many warm, light evenings do we have in this country? Over a whole year - very few. We shouldn't stop kids (of any age) from playing outside on the few nights that they can. Even until 9pm. Or even until it gets dark. These summer evenings are so precious, it's sad to waste them. As a previous poster said, it'll be your children soon. And it's very difficult for people, kids or adults, to be quiet when they are having fun. Try it next time you're out with a big group of mates.

HoppinMad Tue 18-Jun-13 23:29:27

Why do so many posters seem to think as soon as my dc are older I will suddenly become selfish and inconsiderate, and allow them to make as much noise and annoy the feck out of the neighbours, regardless of whether they are sleep-deprived young parents with small babies, or an older unwell couple, or whoever it may be [Hmm] I am not that sort of person I assure you.

Hmm also why do so many posters think older children having fun is more important than the sleep of a babies and toddlers. Baby discrimination right there! hmm

ParadiseChick Tue 18-Jun-13 23:33:01

In the same way that as your children leave toddler hood you start to notice how annoying toddlers are when whining and tantruming.

But of course not yours.

ll31 Tue 18-Jun-13 23:36:56

Indeed, how dare children play, nasty beings.

HoppinMad Tue 18-Jun-13 23:39:39

Err actually, I KNOW how annoying toddlers are thank you. Yes my own. Hence the frazzled nerves.

ChippingInWiredOnCoffee Tue 18-Jun-13 23:57:08

I guess most of us hoped that once you got enough sleep you would see how unreasonable you are to want children in the house by 7pm - guess we were being wildly optomistic!

HoppinMad Wed 19-Jun-13 00:12:08

Look, I am repeating myself here, I dont want children locked up in the house by 7pm ffs I am not a horrible or cruel person. But I would appreciate it if parents would tell their kids to crank the volume down a bit at around that time, I dont feel that is unreasonable tbh. Yeah i'm all for let kids be kids, but why does that have to involve screaming and shouting, and swearing and banging God knows what that awful sound was. I wonder if it was an elderly ill person who was being disturbed by the screaming and constant noise, would you have the same opinion, that 'kids are allowed to play out and have fun'? Well screw you ill person. You know babies and toddlers are helpless little beings too, who need their sleep and rest to function.

WorraLiberty Wed 19-Jun-13 00:52:46

What makes you think the parents haven't told them to respect the neighbours?

Also when my dc are older, I believe I would still have some consideration for others with young children, and hope to instill that in my dc also

I agree with that but look how often kids get excited and have no idea how loud they're actually being?

You as an adult need to have a polite word with them. Tell them that their noise is disturbing your children who are trying to sleep.

For all you know, they could be mortified and very apologetic. If for any reason they're not...or you get a mouth full of cheek - then it's time for a polite word with their parents.

But kids aren't mind readers. If they don't now they're disturbing you or they don't realise how loud they're actually being, they're not going to keep it down are they?

ChippingInWiredOnCoffee Wed 19-Jun-13 00:58:24

You'll understand one day - until then seethe quietly.

fackinell Wed 19-Jun-13 01:08:02

Gah!!! I live right next to a primary school and impossible to get a lie in. The bell wakes me and there is one kid that does this constant high pitched shriek. Not to mention constantly finding rubbish thrown into our garden plus balls, hoops, clothes and shoes.

I did ask the school to mention to the kids about the rubbish but can hardly tell them to be quiet.

BellaVita Wed 19-Jun-13 06:19:39

Agree with Chipping.

Smudging Wed 19-Jun-13 07:49:22

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Abra1d Wed 19-Jun-13 07:55:37

Go outside and say, very politely, 'Hi, everyone, isn't it great we can be outside now it's warmer! Would it be possible for you to be a little bit quieter when you're outside our house so the little ones can sleep? Thanks for your help.'

MiaowTheCat Wed 19-Jun-13 08:41:07

I get pissed off when the parents turn them out of the house, telling them not to play out in front of theirs (the very very quiet in terms of traffic end of the street) because THEY don't want the noise of their own children and kick them further along the street so we have to put up with it. That's being a twat- sorry, and if we have another summer like we did last year with them outside OUR houses till 10pm most nights, and our car being damaged again (just by them playing and not really thinking - hence us having to just suck up the cost which we could really ill afford) - I'm going to their letting agent with a complaint.

If it was a game going up and down the street in front of everyone's houses I wouldn't mind as much - but the kicking them well away from their own houses so the parents in question don't have to put up with the noise (and we know this goes on - we've heard the shouted conversation... you could have heard it in the next county to be honest) pisses me off a lot.

Thankfully the kids' bedroom's to the rear of the house so the noise for DD1 is minimal. DD2 though still is in with us downstairs till we go to bed and then our room so does get disturbed by it.

IWipeArses Wed 19-Jun-13 08:50:06

Just because your kids bedtime is 7, don't presume that everybody else's is.
I think 9 o'clock is a reasonable time for things to quieten down.
As if school kids get four hours to play after school, haven't you read any of the homework threads?

mrsjay Wed 19-Jun-13 08:54:15

I think I have got to that age where kids making noise just gets on my wick , in a few years I will be the grumpy old lady who wont give them there ball back blush we seem to have had an influx of kids here and god they are bloody noisy my own precious DDs were never as noisy wink

mrsjay Wed 19-Jun-13 08:54:29

their*

valiumredhead Wed 19-Jun-13 08:58:13

Baby discrimination did you really just say that ? grin

xylem8 Wed 19-Jun-13 09:16:57

so OP perhaps you should not use your garden during the day, because night shift workers might be sleeping?

Nanny0gg Wed 19-Jun-13 09:42:53

Oh you lot do make me laugh!

Indeed, how dare children play, nasty beings.
How many warm, light evenings do we have in this country? Over a whole year - very few. We shouldn't stop kids (of any age) from playing outside on the few nights that they can. Even until 9pm. Or even until it gets dark. These summer evenings are so precious, it's sad to waste them. As a previous poster said, it'll be your children soon. And it's very difficult for people, kids or adults, to be quiet when they are having fun. Try it next time you're out with a big group of mates.

The OP wasn't objecting to children playing, just the fact it was bedtime, they were loud and they were outside her house, not their house. Funny that. Especially when you know there is a park right next door to the street.

I also highly doubt, that when the OP's children are old enough to play out, that she will let them disturb the neighbours during those 'precious' summer evenings.

And as for being quiet when out with a big group of mates - how old are you? Do you hang about outside people's houses 'having fun'?
Really?

doormat Wed 19-Jun-13 09:48:28

Yabu...good gosh...life doesnt revolve around your babies....kids are kids...have a quiet and nice word if they are outside in your garden but otherwise they are only playing...and 8.30 lare lmao ...my 12 yr old stays out to 9.30...11.00pm on fri sat as long as i can see him on the front

xylem8 Wed 19-Jun-13 14:40:05

I think this thread should go into classics.
It's 7 pm. hush world! Ops babies are trying to go to sleep!!

halcyondays Wed 19-Jun-13 16:22:26

Can't see the harm in two or three year olds being out at 8.30 on a bright summer evening, they don't have to get up for school in the morning. Nearly all the kids in our street play out until 8.00-8.30 in the evenings. I think it's fine, although if they are screaming and shrieking very loudly, then they should be told to keep the noise down.

halcyondays Wed 19-Jun-13 16:26:41

The kids here that are out until that time are from 3 or 4 and up. Can't imagine anyone calling 8.30 a very late time for teenagers to be out, you'd hardly expect them to be tucked up in bed at 7p.m!

youmeatsix Wed 19-Jun-13 16:42:40

i think we all go through cycles, when we have babies & toddlers, kids outside are annoying, then its our kids outside, annoying other folk probably, then yours get older and you are annoyed again at kids outside!

mrsjay Wed 19-Jun-13 17:13:30

then yours get older and you are annoyed again at kids outside!

^ ^ this is me grin

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