To spend our money on a new bicycle

(120 Posts)
BJunction Thu 16-May-13 20:43:14

Hello all,

I wanted to get the "female" perspective on this...

My wife is due in a few months and we're putting all my recent bonus money and savings towards the required purchases. The issue is there is a lovely bike that I've been eyeing up to compliment my existing stable of bikes. The bike cost is about 40%-50% of the money we have but I'm sure we can get by on what's left. There's easily enough for a good cot and the rest of the stuff we'll need.

I've even made a spreadsheet covering the spend so it's clear we can do it but the wife is insistent that we spend all the money on the new born... who won't even remember this stage of his life.

am I being unreasonable for wanting this great bike whilst making sure there's enough left to cover the cost of the incoming baby?

1Catherine1 Thu 16-May-13 20:47:36

Can I just check that this isn't a reverse AIBU?

If you were my husband I would probably kill you if you did. Expecting or not. How can you take 50% of your savings to spend on your "stable of bikes". It is incredibly selfish.

ItsAllGoingToBeFine Thu 16-May-13 20:49:43

Yabu.

I really shouldn't have to explain why

You're not my DP are you?

Scholes34 Thu 16-May-13 20:52:22

Trade in some of your "stable" of bikes to get the new one. Simple!

BJunction Thu 16-May-13 20:52:44

What's AIBU?

Catherine, by the look on my wife's face I get the impression that she is thinking the same...

I don't think so IAGTBF.

I'm sure it's not a big deal as long as we can afford the other bits and bobs and then I'l have a great new bike too.

PoppyWearer Thu 16-May-13 20:53:53

If not for the fact I'm not pregnant, I would be wondering if this were my DH...

Fairylea Thu 16-May-13 20:57:11

Ermmm I think Yabu.

This is family money that has been saved for the baby, yep? So spend the money on the baby!

Or have an adult joint discussion about providing for the baby more cheaply and splitting the remainder of the money between you both for whatever you fancy - but only if you are both in agreement. You can't just randomly decide to buy a bike with money you've saved for the baby.

boatclub Thu 16-May-13 21:00:02

Yes but it's not just a cot and stuff is it? what about making up the shortfall in income whilst your wife is on ML or if she becomes a SAHM?

How many bikes does one man need? Could you sell one or two and get the new one?

Will you have enough time for cycling once the baby arrives?

Is there anything - not baby related that your wife needs/wants that part of the cash could be spent on ?

Just a few thoughts ...

FreshLeticia Thu 16-May-13 21:04:35

Soooo, why are you not buying all the baby stuff from the bonus etc and then splitting the balance between you and your DW?
It is not your money, it is you and your DW's money. You are a team, a family. YAN being fair.

JiltedJohnsJulie Thu 16-May-13 21:05:37

How about not spending the money and saving it so that one of you can take extra time off with Lo when Lo arrives? I saved my money and had 10 months off with each, DH had over a month off when number 2 arrived.

You won't get time to ride the bike anyway. Your cycling tops will be covered in sick and you'll be too busy fetching your dwife snacks and drinks or trying to console a screaming baby,

Good luck, you sound like you might need it,

rootypig Thu 16-May-13 21:07:20

50% of your bonus and savings?! YABU. keep that 50% for the inevitable unexpected expenses, things you haven't thought you might need, money to take care of your family in a pinch.

though, this reminds me of my MIL telling me that FIL went out and spent all his money on surfboards when she told him he was pregnant, before the baby could get it hmm. She laughs about it, because she sees it as his expression of his natural fears at the time I suppose. That said, she raised DH largely without his help.

so YADBU.

RandomMess Thu 16-May-13 21:08:19

How much time will you get to ride this new bike, do you not realise that your free time is going to at least half imminently?

rootypig Thu 16-May-13 21:09:15

*she was pregnant! FIL was not pregnant in the least grin

As a bike guy, I'd say if you wanted the bike badly enough could you not trade away one of you other bikes?

BikeRunSki Thu 16-May-13 21:11:05

Let me intorduce you to my DH, he can tell you how much time he'd had with his "stable of bikes" in the last 5 years since the DC came along.

I can appreciate a stable of bikes (I have one myself), but now's not the time.

ChippingInLovesSunshine Thu 16-May-13 21:14:50

Are you hands itchy?

JiltedJohnsJulie Thu 16-May-13 21:15:21

smile at BRS. DH has just started cycling lots again, our youngest will be 6 soon and by lots I mean once some weeks grin

HollyBerryBush Thu 16-May-13 21:16:33

Can you not sell the other bikes?

nocake Thu 16-May-13 21:22:42

Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha... before DD came along I was a keen triathlete. I swam twice a week, ran regularly and cycled every weekend. I was the proud owner of a fine selection of bikes.

DD is 2 and the last time my road bike was used was... actually, I can't remember. I still run a couple of times a week but I don't swim any more. There are other priorities in my life now.

Forget the bike. You won't use it. You're now saying to yourself "nonsense, it'll be different for me" but it really won't. Trust me... I know.

JollyOrangeGiant Thu 16-May-13 21:25:01

Hah

Liara Thu 16-May-13 21:27:45

Save that 50% and if, 6 months after your baby is born you still think that buying that bike is a good idea and you will get lots of use out of it, then you can buy it if there is anything left after the divorce settlement

BikeRunSki Thu 16-May-13 21:29:01

Once a week JJJ ? getting some good spring miles in then!

JiltedJohnsJulie Thu 16-May-13 21:30:57

Well almost every week smile

Startail Thu 16-May-13 21:55:44

Buy a really geeky high tec pushchair you won't be cycling for a long while. Which is great poncy Lycra clad cyclists clog up our lanes.

ScrambledSmegs Thu 16-May-13 22:21:45

Oh dear.

You are definitely not thinking ahead here. You'll be needing that money for all the other incidentals that crop up during mat leave. There's always something that requires expenditure, trust me.

If you're planning on being an involved parent you probably won't have time for another bike. Unless it's for getting to work, in which case you should consider getting rid of one or two of your others in order to cover the cost of it.

Is there any chance that this desire for a new bike is some sort of displacement for the nervousness you're probably feeling at the prospect of being a parent? It is fucking scary, I know. It's such a seismic change in your life. But now is the time that you need to be spending more time with your partner, building up some good solid foundations because you will probably need them in the coming months. It's doubtful that a new bike will contribute to that.

FredFredGeorge Thu 16-May-13 22:32:47

How secure is your income, how easily will you be able to build the savings up again, will you get more bonuses...

But, whilst 2 and 6 months is ludicrous times for you to retake up your hobby both my wife and I returned to our hobbies pretty much immediately after birth, having both time to ourselves, and more importantly time for the baby and other parent to be alone together, certainly not 2 years, and I'm pretty surprised by anyone who calls themselves "Keen" actually gives something up for 2 years. There will likely be less time for you to cycle and your performance will go down, so why bother with the new bike?

Babies are not that expensive unless you choose them to be, but they do have a cost, and it does make you more nervous about lack of buffers in times of need, hence the questions about your income / future bonuses.

But no, you are not being completely unreasonable to consider spending money on your hobby, but it depends on what's lost by doing that.

theoriginalandbestrookie Thu 16-May-13 22:43:42

Are you my DH in disguise who has recently bamboozled me into believing that actually buying a second hand sports car is in fact a great economy which is saving our household money rather than frittering it awayconfused.

Look in some respects YANBU. We spent loads on a special cot with a dropside (which we never used), a super duper pram that was replaced within 6 months by a second hand buggy as more light weight and there were various other bits and bobs that I thought were essential and turned out not to be.

But this is really not the time to be adding to your "stable" of bikes. You have more than one already, presumably unless you are superhuman you can only cycle one at a time.

Your wife's life has changed immeasurably already, she is carrying your child inside her. Taking money that you have both saved in good faith for your baby and spending it on your grown man toy is selfish. Plus you are kind of giving the message that 50% of the money is yours and 50% is for the baby. Where do luxuries for your wife come into it - what treat does she get other than necessities for the baby?

badguider Thu 16-May-13 22:48:43

My DH and I are both cyclists and have more than one bike each. But this is not the time to buy a new one. Really.
If the money is still there on your LOs first birthday and you are still cycling enough to warrant it then maybe consider/discuss it then but for now you'd be FAR more sensible to spend half on the newborn and save half for unexpected expenses.

ChairmanWow Thu 16-May-13 23:01:21

As a fellow cyclist I'm really tempted to say YANBU, we don't need to spend mega bucks on babies as long as they have somewhere to sleep, wear and a means of transport, but as a mum of a toddler and young baby I have to say it's unlikely you're going to get tonnes of use out of the new bike. Wait until the dust has settled with your family and you can commit some time to cycling again. There may have been a newer model of your desired bike by this point anyway. Why buy something that will gather dust for a while?

PatPig Thu 16-May-13 23:51:58

It depends. If the bike is £1k and you have a household income of £2k/mth, Yabu. If your household income is £10k/mth, Yanbu.

If you are planning on spending thousands on expensive pushchairs and nursery furniture, then that's probably something for you both to reconsider, unless you can afford bikes and middle class nursery accessories, in which case you can both posses your collective incomes up the wall and sod the future.

NatashaBee Fri 17-May-13 00:06:59

How would you feel if your wife wanted to spend the same amount of money on a new pair of shoes to add to her closet full of them?

I'm sure you can sell some of your 'stable' to fund the new addition, although I don't know quite when you think you'll get to ride it for the foreseeable future.

You don't need a female perspective. You have one of those, your wife's. You need a selfish twunt's perspective. Why do you get to spend half of the saving on you and half on the baby while your wife should... be grateful she is allowed to carry your baby?

PatPig Fri 17-May-13 01:04:21

it depends what they are buying for the baby tbh. A lot of stuff 'for the baby' is for the benefit of the parents.

StuntGirl Fri 17-May-13 01:07:52

Well obviously this is a vastly unreasonable attitude, but you knew that when you posted didn't you?

BJunction Fri 17-May-13 07:24:16

Get rid of a bicycle?! That would be like removing a teddy bear from a child's collection of teddy bears, one that they don't play with as much anymore and it's ear may have fallen off but they still love it.

I've just put a deposit down on a an awesome Specialized S-Works Venge onlinegrin

I get I may get in trouble based on the comments made so far. My thinking is that we can easily make this work, my spreadsheet details all the stuff we should need so am pretty sure we'll be okay.

wonderingsoul Fri 17-May-13 07:28:46

i think you are being increadably selfish indeed.

BikeRunSki Fri 17-May-13 07:29:15

Thing is, if you were going to go and get the bike anyway, why did you even start this thread? The S Works is a nice bike though.

BikeRunSki Fri 17-May-13 07:30:43

<counts self v lucky that DH is happy to sell bikes and but second hand>

tumbletumble Fri 17-May-13 07:33:47

This is either a joke or you are a truly selfish man

Wow, you are a complete twat and I hope your partner sees the light.

lljkk Fri 17-May-13 07:37:11

That's an £8.5k bike at RRP. shock If your wife was planning to spend £17k on "new stuff for the baby" then I may be in the yanbu camp after all. Then again, if you need some of the original £17k total for things like your mortgage or a car bigger than your present Smart car then YABVU.

Please tell me you aren't buy the Venge on credit?!

We are a bikey family. DH just got a £4k bike as a leaving present from his company (Ridley Noah). It lives indoors because we don't trust security in the garage. That brings our stable population up to about 18. 5 of which are basically DH's bikes alone. (Please tell me you have an extra secure place to store that Venge). Are you paying the full £8.5k?

And even I am feeling rather hmm at OP! Are you sure you didn't want to ask this on BikeRadar instead? Or is this all a windup?

SecondRow Fri 17-May-13 07:42:01

Has your wife had input into your spreadsheet and how much discretionary spending for her hobbies/desires up until the end of maternity leave does it include?

lljkk Fri 17-May-13 07:45:56

And what are you going to use the Venge for?
The Noah is for fun rides & long-distance TTing. No commuting at present, but maybe that in future, too.

enormouse Fri 17-May-13 07:50:56

I think you might end up losing that deposit tbh when your wife realises you've done it. What was the point of canvassing opinion if you had already decided that you were going to buy a ridiculously expensive bit of kit?

Fwiw it's worth my DP wanted a new ps3 for when our DS came. He decided to wait till after he was born and realised he has no time. Not to mention, his bike is sitting forlornly is our dining room (has been for almost 2 years). I use it to dry clothes on when it's raining.

In terms of things that are actually useful and slightly awesome we bought a three wheeled rough terrain buggy 2nd hand as we live in the countryside and walk a lot. DP chose it (and was extremely excited about it) and gets way more use out of it than his bike or than he would out of a ps3.

Mondrian Fri 17-May-13 07:51:08

I know you asked for a female opinion but how about a male, cyclist with a stable of bikes. As everyone has already said now is not the time even if you could easily afford it as you will be sending a the wrong signals to your DW which I am sure is unintentional .... It's her time and the new babies time, in other words she needs to know that you will also be able to make sacrifices (as she already is) and that you are not going to shoot off on a different selfish tangent.

To ease the pain of you apparent loss let me remind you how bicycle sales work. When you see 50% off it either means its coming from a mass marketed brand who have changed colour or something which is not a problem coz they do that 3/4 times a year or its from a faulty batch with high warranty replacements or its an old model from a reputable brand .... These things are always out there and can be had if you really want them in future.

enormouse Fri 17-May-13 07:53:46

Oh and if you were my DP and had the audacity to present me with a spreadsheet, I would make you eat the sodding thing.

hormones
smile

noblegiraffe Fri 17-May-13 07:55:46

Bloody hell my car cost less than that, and that was a big purchase!

GoofyIsACow Fri 17-May-13 08:01:36

BUT... HE HAS DONE A SPREADSHEET PEOPLE... SO IT MUST BE OK hmm

edwardsmum11 Fri 17-May-13 08:08:12

Yabu, just wondering if you have multible bums to go on your bikes...

noblegiraffe Fri 17-May-13 08:18:45

I hope the spreadsheet doesn't have a 'finance on new bike' column then Lidl nappies, charity shop clothes, no formula (DW can breastfeed), DW going back to work early, DH doing hours of overtime etc.

BikeRunSki Fri 17-May-13 08:22:18

let's hope you don't get made redundant when your baby is tiny, like what happened to DH. He had to sell his track bike, cyclocross bike and hardtail just to pay the mortgage.

BJunction Fri 17-May-13 08:28:19

at least Goofy gets it

LIZS Fri 17-May-13 08:33:23

Does it include a baby seat or trailer ? Midlife crisis perhaps !

Mondrian Fri 17-May-13 08:34:38

I should really stop reading/posting on AIBU section.

BumpingFuglies Fri 17-May-13 08:46:27

YABU and selfish.

enormouse Fri 17-May-13 08:48:18

Bjunction I suggest you pay for your wife to have a babymoon or spa weekend with her friends (as you can obvs afford it). Also a post baby haircut and some loads of new clothes. That would probably go down better than a spreadsheet, as you seem hellbent on getting this bike.

Fairylea Fri 17-May-13 08:54:14

So this spreadsheet.... I take it once the baby stuff is sorted there is xxx amount left over... I hope your wife enjoys spending her half of the xxx just as you will when you are left with enough to buy a second hand rusty tin bike...

lottiegarbanzo Fri 17-May-13 08:55:00

You should probably read the thread about the husband buying a new PS3.

What massive, equivalent treat does your wife get, out of your joint, family income?

Oh, the baby is her treat, right? Ha, ha, ha.

BJunction Fri 17-May-13 08:58:12

I'm a little disappointed with the reaction so far.

It's important that I keep fit and am able to retain some level of creature comforts. The baby will get a cot and whetever else and my wife is getting a tablet PC for her birthday so it's all good.

HousewifeFromHeaven Fri 17-May-13 09:01:52

Ha ha ha ha. Aha ha ha ha. Good luck with that op.

1Catherine1 Fri 17-May-13 09:03:14

You are seriously unbelievable! I hope your wife pops on and lets us know if she went for serious maiming, murder or divorce.

The bit you have plainly missed is that your actions show that you think the things you want are more important than what she may want or need! Do you really think there aren't things your wife would want but never ask for because it would be financially unwise? Or because that money had been earmarked for your child. And yes - a baby doesn't have to cost a lot, but since that money was for the baby perhaps your DW wanted to buy something nice with it for the baby and now has to change those plans and go for the cheap option.

You are a selfish man-child!

BikeRunSki Fri 17-May-13 09:03:58

Hey,I get it as a cyclist, but people here are giving you the benefit of their experience of also being a parent.

Out of my stable (Specialized Epic full susser, custom frame custom build audax bike, x-cross bike, hard tail), the bike that gets the most use is the ex-hire Dawes hardtail. It's great for babyseats and hauling a tag-along. i'm not going to be doing 100 mile sportiness for while, but i've made my peace with that. I still ride, just differently. Financial insecurity make me v nervous, and if I had £9K or so to spare, I'd want to put it aside as a cushion against some of what life and babies can throw at you.

Actually, I don't get it as a cyclist. £8.5K won't make you a better rider. Are you a Cat 1 rider by any chance? if you really need such a spangly bike, you should have a word with your sponsor grin. Any chance you could nip over to Italy and make up two or three minutes?

BikeRunSki Fri 17-May-13 09:05:13

Sportives,not sportiness!

Fairylea Fri 17-May-13 09:07:56

So you're essentially giving yourself a second birthday.. so where is your wife's second birthday?

You can keep fit by jogging. Its free.

lottiegarbanzo Fri 17-May-13 09:12:35

If it's all good, your wife will have agreed it is good and you wouldn't need to ask us. So it isn't is it? Not in your life, just in your head.

arethereanyleftatall Fri 17-May-13 09:15:48

BJunction

I'm on your side. I would be fine with this (I'm a mum and a wife). You are making sure the baby gets the stuff he/she needs first afterall.

But....would it not be worth waiting a bit? I say this because some babies are really easy, just sleep and feed, but...some struggle and cry a lot and require a lot of attention. You don't know yet whether you will still have loads of time to go out on a bike, or not.

Ermm.. people? Wind-up?

MummytoKatie Fri 17-May-13 09:30:01

Does a tablet PC cost £8k? Because mine was less than 10% of that.

And this is your wife's birthday present?

So you get an £8k present "just because" and she gets a £500 present for her birthday. Doesn't sound that good from her perspective really.

Re: keeping fit. My dh has a bike worth about £200 and no gym membership because he doesn't see the point. He also has a resting pulse of about 50 and the lung capacity of a 19 year old soldier (whatever that means?!) Admittedly he is an ex junior international at a sport so started from a high standard but if you need £8k worth of bi,e to keep fit then you are doing it wrong!

mum47 Fri 17-May-13 09:33:12

Pffffft. What Flouncy said.

Charliefox Fri 17-May-13 09:34:11

Wind up and not even a good one. You sound like a massive spanner.

Snog Fri 17-May-13 09:37:40

Surely you need to discuss spending priorities with your wife not with mumsnet!

DeepRedBetty Fri 17-May-13 09:39:23

hmm

Marking my place in case we get a particularly nice deletion message from HQ

This can't be real. How can someone this clueless be making so much money?

Either your wife is quitting work to stay home, in which case that money will help substitute for her salary.

Or she is going back to work, in which case your shiny new bike will pay for a year's worth of childcare.

Get it?

arethereanyleftatall Fri 17-May-13 09:43:40

I always think many, many of the posters on here need to chill out.
1. They can afford it.
2. Bjunction likes cycling.
3. So, he's NBU.
Why must we give up our lives and hobbies when our kids are born?!? It's really not necessary!

BJunction Fri 17-May-13 09:50:12

Yes, thank you aretheyanyleft!

lottiegarbanzo Fri 17-May-13 09:51:24

Ok, before this disappears, can I really be the first to observe that this thread brings a whole new dimension to the phrase 'all the gear, no idea'! Points please!

Isn't there a "bike to work" scheme where you can do a salary sacrifice to repay a government backed bike loan, thus saving the income tax on the cost? That would be a more tax efficient way to buy the bike, and you'd look less selfish, as the bike cost would come from your income over the next few years rather than family savings.
Just a thought, since you're clearly going to get the bike whatever we say.

ScrambledSmegs Fri 17-May-13 09:56:27

Mmm. Your wife doesn't sound ok with it though. She's the one you're married to, not arethereanyleftatall. If you say ' look, one lone female poster on MN agrees with me, ergo I am right!' I can't really see that changing her mind.

But, it's your marriage. Your family. Don't say we didn't warn you...

arethere:

1. He says they can afford it, his wife doesn't think so
2. Spending half your savings on a luxury item when you're about to have a baby, in an uncertain economy, is pretty foolish
3. Who says he has to give up his hobby??? He already has a stable of bikes. No one would object if he sold one or two to fund the new one.

I am plenty chilled out, I just think that if the OP is real he's being incredibly selfish and short-sighted.

StuntGirl Fri 17-May-13 10:29:49

My thoughts exactly flouncy.

PatPig Fri 17-May-13 10:29:57

I don't think spending £8k on a bike is necessarily being unreasonable.

If a female poster came on here saying 'I earn £500k/year and have just bought myself a new sports car and am having a baby, AIBU?' then people would say 'no YANBU, you earnt it, you spend it'.

Cars costing more than a few thousand pounds are unnecessary extravagances as much as an £8k bike is, yet I see many many mothers driving their kids round in new BMW X5s, Range Rovers, and other such vehicles.

How is a £50k Range Rover not more of a waste of money than an £8k bike?

Oldraver Fri 17-May-13 10:37:24

Are the bike forum lot bored again ?

BookieMonster Fri 17-May-13 10:42:48

I would imagine your wife is keeping a spreadsheet of her own and that the negative column looks pretty heavy.

arethereanyleftatall Fri 17-May-13 10:46:30

fair points dreaming bohemian.

This whole thread depends entirely on OPs financial situation, and unless I've missed it, we haven't been made aware.

Like Patpig states, if he earns 500k a year, it's fine.

If this is all their savings gone and they'll have to scrimp going forward, then it's very silly.

A pot of £8K for a new born far more than is needed. All you need is a cot, a car seat, a baby bjorn, a few babygros and 2 boobs. £500.

So, my assumption is OP has plenty of money.

arethereanyleftatall Fri 17-May-13 10:47:51

And nappies.

SybilRamkin Fri 17-May-13 10:57:55

This is a blatant wind-up. Nobody is actually selfish enough to believe that a PC tablet equals a several thousand pound racing bike. OP is having us on.

sparechange Fri 17-May-13 11:00:25

Another former triathlete here, with joint custody of a his-n-hers stable.
And another person who thinks you are being an arse.

For what it is worth, the best thing we bought was a turbo trainer, and a nice fancy quiet one that is virtually silent, but will give you as much of a work out as 4 hours in the hills. Combine it with some Sufferfest videos and you can still stay as fit as you ever need to be, but without giving your wife the impression that your life carries on as normal while hers stops dead and revolves around your child. That way, if you wife needs some help while you are 'mid ride', you are in the next room, not 40 miles from home. And if she wants to do a bit of gentle exercise in the privacy of her own home while the baby is asleep, she can.

(and the fact you've bought this bike online, rather than going into the shop and a)haggling and b) actually getting it fitted to you makes me think you are probably a bit all-the-gear-no-idea, rather than actually any good)

lljkk Fri 17-May-13 11:06:47

Brad has dropped out of the Giro, BikeRunSki, chest infection. sad Uran is the new Sky leader.

I would REALLY like to know how Wife is going to manage to spend £8.5k on first year baby kit. Can you copy that bit of the spreadsheet over here, BJunction?

Maryz Fri 17-May-13 11:14:11

I am rapidly filling my bingo card:

Fuckwittery - tick
Trolling - tick
Troll-hunting - tick
Sockpuppetting - tick
Posters taking other posters seriously - tick
Boasting about having lots of money - tick
AIBU op insisting they are not (contrary to everyone else's opinion) actually being unreasonable - tick

Bunfighting - getting there grin

Will someone please say she should LTB and then it'll be complete.

ToomuchIsBackOnBootcamp Fri 17-May-13 11:15:03

YABU. £500 quid tablet v 8.5k bike. hmm yeah that is so fair.

Have you though about any of the other possibilities, what if your wife is ill after birth and can't return to work / you have to take extra time off / you are made redundant or have a serious accident/illness / your child is born with special needs requiring massive adaptions to your home / ALL of these things have happened to various friends of mine over the years and they all ate through savings like nobody's business.

Ok you might think the risks of this are small and dont want to put your greed (and it IS greed not need, since you already have several bikes) on hold for a few months, instant gratification nation etc. but Why not wait a year and see how things pan out and if you can still afford/want it then, discuss again with your wife? Who knows what costs may crop up in the early days, it's always more expensive than a predicted spreadsheet.

MummytoKatie Fri 17-May-13 11:19:55

arethere but the £8k may also be needed to cover the cost of loss of incom due to maternity leave.

Op implied that there was enough money according to his spreadsheet. Not that there would be £50k spare sitting in a savings account.

Actually we do have over £50k spare sitting in a savings account. Nd as mentioned up thread dh is an ex junior international at a sport so pretty dedicated really. I would still need quite a lot of convincing for him to spend £8k on the sport.

Fairylea Fri 17-May-13 11:39:01

LTB!

Because she will.

Even if she says oh it's fine get your bike.

You can bet she's seething. And storing this up ready to throw back at you.

Technotropic Fri 17-May-13 11:55:06

Can I ask what group set it comes with or is Di2 the default grin

Nice bike BTW and I hope you're haggling down the £8.5k price as I'm sure there's 5-10% in there somewhere.

Personally I wouldn't though. If it were just 40-50% of the bonus then maybe but I wouldn't want to cash in all my savings too.

You are definitely NBU to want the bike. Whether YABU to actually buy the thing is another matter.

To put it into perspective a friend has just had a baby and they've bought a brand new X3 for £30k. There's no 'real' need to spend £30k on a car but there you go. At least you get the benefit of keeping fit with an £8k bike.

All the best with whatever decision you come to but just hope you don't annoy your wife too much smile

ScrambledSmegs Fri 17-May-13 12:10:17

Oh. I thought it was just bonus. It's bonus and savings. So half of all that on a bike?

Doesn't sound particularly financially astute to me.

PoppyWearer Fri 17-May-13 13:20:47

£8k on a bike. Definitely having a larf.

(Speaking as someone whose DH is a high-earner and has just spent over a grand on a vair naice bike which is perfectly fine for weekend cycling.)

If you earn that much money you won't have much spare time to use it anyway.

arethere -- I totally agree you don't need to spend much on a baby, but they don't stay babies forever... you can easily spend more than 10K a year on childcare in London. If the wife becomes a SAHM then there's her salary to replace.

if it were half a paycheck, that's one thing, but we're talking half their accumulated savings

(IF this is real, that is, which I find so hard to believe)

theoriginalandbestrookie Fri 17-May-13 13:29:52

Well I hope you have pointed your wife in the direction of mumsnet as I have a feeling she is going to be using it quite a bit over the next few months.

MummytoMog Fri 17-May-13 13:38:29

Buy a Taga. You might get to use that. But probably not.

sparechange Fri 17-May-13 14:05:08

Technotropic, I'll eat my hat if it isn't Di2
He's already said upthread that he wants 'boys toys', and with that sort of mentality, he won't go for anything as antiquated as mechancials...

I also have a vision of a proper MAMIL with a paunch, rather than the toned rider that I imagine he thinks he is

Technotropic Fri 17-May-13 14:44:46

LOL @ MAMIL. Talk about shattering the illusion.

<snob>

PoppyWearer. Come on. There's no such thing as a naice bike for over a grand. Tut wink

</snob>

lottiegarbanzo Fri 17-May-13 17:00:51

You will come back and tell us how the subsequent conversation with your wife went, won't you Mr BJ?

VivaLeBeaver Fri 17-May-13 17:02:51

It depends, what bike is it?

grin

BJunction Fri 17-May-13 17:17:26

It had to be Di2, I waited until they were a little more proven but I'm really looking forward to the smooth gear change and especially interested in the auto-trim on the front derailleur.

I'm having the "I've just spent a lot of our saved money on a truly awesome bicycle" chat this evening.

Helmet on, thick skin engaged, spreadsheet detailing spend at the ready. I'll update the result but I'm sure it won't go too terribly... If you don't hear from me again, it's been nice knowing you.

BJunction Fri 17-May-13 17:19:07

VivaLeBeaver, it's a Specialized S-Works Venge (Di2)

Excite grin

JiltedJohnsJulie Fri 17-May-13 17:25:52

That's settles it then. All the bike forums are slagging off specialized big time.

Save your money. Then once Lo has arrived put £1 in a pot everytime you go out cycling. In 10 to 15 years you might have saved up enough for a decent bike grin

VivaLeBeaver Fri 17-May-13 19:28:16

I like Specialized, I've got one but mine is a Tricross.

VivaLeBeaver Fri 17-May-13 19:31:03

OK, so bike is £8500. Its very nice and I do love bikes and will happily spend 1k plus on a bike. But really - 8.5k???

Do you need a bike that good? How much racing do you do? How much are you likely to do once baby is here?

On the other hand if thats 50% of your savings and you have another 8.5k left to spend on baby.......well that's more than enough money for baby stuff, etc.

But you could put the 8.5k towards a college fund.

Bakingtins Fri 17-May-13 19:47:49

Pre-kids, my husband was a pretty committed cyclist (cycled to work, frequently doing 100 mile+ rides, mountain biking at the weekends). Oldest is now 6 and he's back to doing a bit of cycling, but it is cycle to work, tootle down the railway path at the weekend, family MTB trails, nothing that requires anything other than a basic bike. He has a decent pre-kids mountain bike, an old racer and a pub bike. I have a 1k hybrid, the kids have islabikes. We're a pro cycling family. I would kill him if he spent that much of our savings at a financially uncertain time on his hobbies. You need that cushion when your wife will not be earning for a while. If she goes back a big chunk of your income will go on childcare. You will not have time for the sort of cycling that requires an expensive bike. Your baby may not need much now but they sure as hell will at some point - if you have savings put them in an ISA for your child's future. Stop being a selfish arse, step up and start being a parent.

chrome100 Fri 17-May-13 20:11:32

Yanbu. As long as your wife gets one too.

Technotropic Fri 17-May-13 20:39:10

BJunction

The fact that you're saying that you've spent 'our' savings leads me to think that you're taking the pee a weeny bit (am being kind!). Like I said earlier though, if you went out and bought a brand new 4x4 you'd lose £8.5k very quickly in depreciation. Also if you spend £8.5k on kids stuff then, in reality, you will only be putting it up on ebay in a few years whereas I hope you'll still be polishing the bike in years to come.

Therefore, woah, enjoy! The bike sounds awesome. Personally I don't get the attitude that you don't 'need' such an expensive bike. Sure we don't need anything but it's good to have luxury in your life.

No-one needs granite/marble worktops, Aga's, swanky houses, the Mercedes Benz, 1ct diamonds, or holidays in the Maldives. Personally I would rather have split the £8.5k 50/50 with my OH but that's just me. Just make sure you remember this and spoil your wife rotten when you next have the opportunity (bonus time perhaps).

For now though, enjoy the bike smile

FarBetterNow Fri 17-May-13 20:41:18

BJunction: I feel sad reading your comments.
I feel sorry for your wife and your new baby.
I feel sad that you seem to want a new bike more than a baby.

I was married to a selfish git. He only thought of himself.

Never mind, you can always cycle off into the sunset on your new bike.

Fairylea Fri 17-May-13 20:45:34

I can't believe everyone is being so civilised about this.

These are savings. For a baby. That belong to both people.

One of them wants a bike, not just any bike. 8.5k worth of bike.

Why on earth should that then be okay to use half that money for the bike??

What if your wife sits down tonight and says, "oh by the way I really fancied a new car so I spent 8.5k of the savings on it. It's ok because I know we can use the rest for the baby. You don't mind do you?"

Where would that leave you then?

Up shit creek without a paddle. Or a bike.

You are being an arse. I'm sorry but you really are.

If you don't need all the money for the baby stuff then save it for as the baby grows. You can't just spend half of it or whatever on a bike for yourself. It's actually very controlling behaviour.

Shenanagins Fri 17-May-13 20:48:28

Farbetternow - except he won't be able to peddle off into the sunset as the bike would be matrimonial property and the wife owns half of it!

FrequentFlyerRandomDent Fri 17-May-13 20:49:28

OP, here you go, here is a bike for you and your growing family. Enjoy. grin

Technotropic Fri 17-May-13 20:54:46

It has just occurred to me, whilst reading the OP again, that your wife is insistent on spending a theoretical £16k on baby stuff. Is this for real?

I think we spent less than £1k on our first baby (cot, pram, clothes, etc). What is she thinking of buying? Silver spoons wink

rainbowbrite1980 Fri 17-May-13 21:02:25

This ihas ito be a joke. Biuy a trailer for the back of one of your existing bikes, to put the baby in :-)

Techno required purchases could include childcare and loss of earnings. 16K would be a snip.

FredFredGeorge Fri 17-May-13 22:28:31

A good trailer costs 190 quid, and yes they're good things to have for when the baby is a bit older - depending on where you have to ride them. 16k is a ludicrous amount to spend on a new baby, just as ludicrous as 8.5k on a Venge, there are better performing bikes for less money but the amounts are really irrelevant in this.

The question is all about what is appropriate way to spend savings and bonuses, I've no idea if me and DP have shared are discretionary hobby spends evenly, it's not that important, we've certainly spent a lot more on ourselves than DD, but then a baby doesn't need much.

lottiegarbanzo Sat 18-May-13 08:00:10

Still awaiting the post-discussion update - and our opportunity to welcome Mrs BJ (bet she doesn't choose that name!).

lljkk Sat 18-May-13 08:18:21

ah, I now realise Di2 is electronic derailleur.
We know a lad who is in the youth development squads (14yo & already has professional sponsors, very committed to training). He's got Di2 or something very equivalent on his sponsored bike & doesn't rate it, would not have it again. Loads of problems. DH steered well away.

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