To think they did this on purpose? PIL related

(303 Posts)
Dannilion Thu 02-May-13 16:01:24

Bit of background..

PIL's are shit with money. They have had failed business after failed business, declared themselves bankrupt, borrowed £££££'s from friends as investments, asked DH to launder money for them etc.

FIL is nice enough, just made some very silly decisions as well as being on the receiving end of some very bad luck. MIL are very different but get on on a surface level.

Anyways, a few months ago PIL's came round and asked if they could open a bank account in DH's name in order to receive their wages or something as due to their bankruptcy they were struggling with doing so. DH said no, as it was obviously illegal and he is also self employed and didn't want to be investigated. Also PFB was due and we were worried about the effect it would have on us when it came to claiming tax credits etc. Not that we should have had to have given a reason for not wanting to partake in this, but we had plenty.

Fast forward to them coming to visit the baby last week and bringing some letters for him that had arrived at their address. He gets the odd one every so often. He opens one and it's from Santander, thanking him for opening a new account. He never opened a new account with them, ever.

PIL's were very quick to say 'oh your father opened an account with them but they did it in the wrong name by accident, never mind all sorted now etc' and changed the subject.

I just can't see how a bank could open an account in the wrong name for someone who hasn't lived at that address in years. All his other mail comes here so if there is some sort of grand database it would had him at our home address surely?

I haven't broached this with DH yet as it would be devastating for him. But AIBU to think that they have probably gone ahead and opened a bank account in his name? Obviously if they have we will have to deal with it ASAP.

olivertheoctopus Thu 02-May-13 16:03:25

Yikes, sounds unlikely to be a mistake. Tell your DH and let him decide what to do, they're his parents!

They've opened a bank account in his name. He needs to get it sorted asap.

minouminou Thu 02-May-13 16:05:18

Oh my shit!

I would be on it like a car bonnet.

I'd move this into Legal, as you may need more detailed advice, and also, because you are deffo NBU.

Accident my bum!

MaxPepsi Thu 02-May-13 16:05:31

I don't want to sound harsh but they need reporting for Fraud.


I'm still boggling at the fact they asked your DH to launder money. Did they get prosecuted for that?

monsterchild Thu 02-May-13 16:06:02

eek! I would get on that sooner rather than later.

And as the owner of the account, your DH can close it too. And stop any payment to it as well. Which he may want to do ASAP.

YANBU and that is really bad. Like you say, it could have massive implications for your DH. He needs to have a word with them and tell them to get it sorted or he will inform the bank. It is quite a rigmarole sometimes opening a new account and at some stage they must have forged his signature - fraud pure and simple.

Sokmonsta Thu 02-May-13 16:06:36

Id be going in asking what ID was used (they'll have copies) and close the account immediately, registering with the bank and the credit scoring people that it was opened illegally in your dh's name, family or not.

actually, no ignore that - he needs to sort it not them...but like now...

diddl Thu 02-May-13 16:08:38

Would it be easy to check?

So-how do you open an account in someone elses name (unless a minor)

Don't you need various proofs?

Bloody fraudulent anyway.

Hope you get sorted out.

cozietoesie Thu 02-May-13 16:09:24

I would also report them for fraud, no matter how hard it might be for you - they clearly had no compunction about potentially putting you in it and who knows what else they might have done. You need the whole thing on record.

ImTooHecsyForYourParty Thu 02-May-13 16:10:04

Of course they have opened an account in his name. And he needs to deal with it right now. Tax credits will be a problem, yes, but also if he is self employed then what happens when the inland revenue decide all the money going through that account is his and tax him on it?

He should go to the bank, with his ID and close it down. He can't leave it and he can't be bothered about how they feel about it.

They asked to open an account in his name. He said no. Coincidentally, an account was opened in his name. Umm, no. It's not a mistake. It is illegal, immoral and stupid but not a mistake.

I do some facilitating with low income families and part of that is financial literacy. Every time I say there are two kinds of identity theft. One, your Russian mob, Nigerian 'royalty', internet gangster type. The other is family. The first is much easier to deal with.

diddl Thu 02-May-13 16:10:18

That said, if they have-good news for you-they've been shit at covering their arses!

ImTooHecsyForYourParty Thu 02-May-13 16:10:52

He also needs to get a copy of his credit report from experian and equifax, in case there's more to this than the bank account.

mrsyattering Thu 02-May-13 16:11:32

I can't see how they could open a new account?? Dh & I just opened a joint account for household stuff, and we had to take passports, a utility bill and show other bank account details. He needs to sort this out sharpish! shock

cantreachmytoes Thu 02-May-13 16:13:53

Agree with all of the above. I'd also call the police fraud number and check it out with them (don't have to give name), because it might be that if he doesn't report it, it could pose problems for him in the future if a credit agency does a check, even if the account was only open 1 week.

I had to call them about a year ago and they were extremely helpful.

ImTooHecsyForYourParty Thu 02-May-13 16:14:40

oh, and re the bankruptcy - there are basic accounts you can open. I think the co op does one for undischarged bankrupts or there's always the post office account, while many banks have basic accounts you can open after discharge.

carabos Thu 02-May-13 16:15:23

That's identity theft isn't it? He doesn't need to have it out with them, he needs to let Santander know and leave them to do the rest wink.

LIZS Thu 02-May-13 16:24:00

If he occasionally gets other post to their address maybe they have intercepted something which was used as id . However it is not that easy to open an account in someone else's name without photo id. Agree he goes into Santander branch, tells them it is not legit and ask them to freeze it. If they have done this now , I'd be concerned about what they may have done , undetected, previously.

sooperdooper Thu 02-May-13 16:26:51

How have they even managed that, they must've stolen some of his ID to show them?

They need reporting, that's identity fraud - what if they now apply for loans or credit cards in his name too??

cozietoesie Thu 02-May-13 16:27:37

What if they already have sooperdooper?

TigerSwallowTail Thu 02-May-13 16:28:00

Didn't your dh phone the bank and ask why an account was opened in his name?

treas Thu 02-May-13 16:28:36

Get your credit score checked out at the same time. If they've opened this account they may well have got loans out in you DH's name.

Dannilion Thu 02-May-13 16:32:49

Well this is the thing, I can't see them taking his i.d at any point, but am thinking it may be possible to have just done it online?

I've brought it up with DH and he agrees that it doesn't seem 'right' and has text MIL about it, I guess giving her a chance to explain before he calls Santander tonight. He doesn't want to believe they would do this though obviously.

Your dh needs to phone Santander and ask about it. And then immediately close the account. You can put the money somewhere safe and quietly wait for the PILs to ask about it. At which point they better have a good explanation!

Although I would be worrying about what ID they used, and what else they've used it for.

Cravey Thu 02-May-13 16:36:56

I would be getting my dh to call the bank ASAP and get a credit check. It's not a mistake you and I both know that. In fact at the end of the day it's bloody fraud and if investigated later on then your dh will be dragged into it and asked why he allowed this to happen. I would also be asking the bank concerned how they managed to do this. It is very very hard to open a bank account nowadays unless you have birth certs proof of id etc. There is something not right here.

ImTooHecsyForYourParty Thu 02-May-13 16:37:56

He's still going to call them, even if she denies it though, isn't he?

Tailtwister Thu 02-May-13 16:39:35

Sounds very suspicious. Do you still have the letter? I would be tempted to get in touch with them to check what it's all about.

Cravey Thu 02-May-13 16:39:59

No point in asking the parents about it IMO if the bank had made a mistake then it's a bloody huge one that has long reaching implications in terms of credit score and fraud. Don't call his parents call the bank ASAP and see what's going on.

cozietoesie Thu 02-May-13 16:40:01


Your DH will be at pains to avoid thinking that his parents could involve him in fraud or put him in the deep doo doo. From what you've said though, they've likely acted completely callously and without thought for your family and where you might end up. In my book, that relieves you and him of filial obligations. You're going to need to be tough here.

myfirstkitchen Thu 02-May-13 16:40:34

As well as sorting this out you need to get any post in DH's name forwarded to your address.

Use the post they brought round and proof of current address. Nip any other accidents in the bud too.

GettingObsessive Thu 02-May-13 16:40:56

It is possible to open Accounts online without taking ID into a bank - I've just done it (in my own name...)

ImtooHecsy I don't believe for one moment that they've done this because they can't get a bank account, they've done it to avoid the trustee in bankruptcy finding out about that account and those earnings. When the trustee finds out about this, which they will inevitably do, FIL is going to be in a LOT of trouble.

DH needs to nip this in the bud NOW.

EldritchCleavage Thu 02-May-13 16:41:02

Your PIL sound thoroughly dishonest, actually.

However reluctant your DH is to think badly of them, given their history I would say you need to speak to Santander urgently and do a full credit check. If they have opened the account your DH needs to act decisively so you don't suffer any adverse consequences.

sudaname Thu 02-May-13 16:42:48

Whatever they say l would go in Santander yourself and explain what you have on here and say although you appreciate data protection rules etc etc and they cant give you any feedback you want to make them aware that your DH lives with you and does not live at that address so any account opened at their address in his name is fraudulent. Or even write to them anonymously. I am sure they will look into it wherever the information comes from.
l wouldn't trust them as far as l could throw them by the sound of it.

ImTooHecsyForYourParty Thu 02-May-13 16:43:32


Yet another reason for the OPs husband to sort it out and make it clear he was no part of it.

Cravey Thu 02-May-13 16:43:59

You can open bank accounts online that is true but it is very hard to open one with a new bank orin a new name. The op really does need to sort this ASAP there are so many implications re the law and fraud etc that its scary. I would imagine this has been done in some way to defraud someone or other as the parents are bankrupt etc.

Oh my god. You need to get on the phone now. The sooner you act, the sooner you are covered. You don't want anyone saying you are complicit because you didn't report it soon enough.

fuzzywuzzy Thu 02-May-13 16:44:53

Carry out a credit check on your names ASAP. Do it online with Experian it will show you what loans and bank accounts and other financial ties you currently have.

Ledkr Thu 02-May-13 16:47:00

Gish how awful what horrible pil.
Make mine look like the partridge family.

SmellsLikeTeenStrop Thu 02-May-13 16:49:27

Get on to Equifax and Experian ASAP. You can get a 30 day free trial where you can see your credit report. This may not be the first time they've used his details.

Zalen Thu 02-May-13 16:52:10

Whether it's a mistake or not, (and face it, if anyone here truly believes it was an accident I have a very nice bridge to sell you, Central London, great location) he still needs to contact Santander to sort it out, explain about the letter and raise hell that either someone has been able to fraudulently open an account in his name or that they have made such a huge error on a genuine application. It would be great if he were able to take the letter with him but I imagine your PIL have taken that away with them.

One thing another poster has written about closing the account and keeping any money from it until PIL ask about is obviously a bad idea. You want absolutely nothing to do with this account or any money that may be in it, the account has likely been opened fraudulently and he has to be very clear to the bank that the account is nothing to do with him so clearly he will have no right to any funds in the account.

LIZS Thu 02-May-13 16:53:44

How often do they visit your house , could they have taken any bills or unused cards ?

whattodoo Thu 02-May-13 16:55:54

I recently did a credit check on myself (for very boring reasons) and found a link through moneysaving which gave me £5 cash back for signing up.

But I must cancel my subscription within 30 days or I get charged a membership fee.

The site (can't recall if it were experian or Equifax) asks for all your previous addresses, so your DH could run a check including his parents' address.

Dannilion Thu 02-May-13 16:58:36

The credit check thing is a brilliant idea, are any of them instant or do they all require you entering a code they send in the post?

I vaguely recall having to wait 2 weeks for a bleedin' code once, and I don't feel we have 2 weeks to wait at the moment.

cozietoesie Thu 02-May-13 17:00:01

I don't know but I think it likely that they'll require a postal check via posted code.

whattodoo Thu 02-May-13 17:00:27

Did mine online. Took about 15 mins and I got an instant report that I could download/print.

cozietoesie Thu 02-May-13 17:00:37

If you report it as fraud though, the authorities would do it all for you.

knittingirl Thu 02-May-13 17:01:02

I did a credit check a couple of years ago, I think it was experian (although it could have been equifax) and it was instant.

cozietoesie Thu 02-May-13 17:01:17

Which one, whattodoo? (I had to await a code with Experian.)

Cravey Thu 02-May-13 17:02:22

Most credit check are instant to be honest though I would be calling the bank first to see what they had to say. It really does need sorting as if this is fraud your husband could be implicated.

cozietoesie Thu 02-May-13 17:02:53

Or I may correct myself. I can't recall precisely (it was 6 months ago) whether I had to await the code for any use at all or just for full functionality.

NotSoNervous Thu 02-May-13 17:03:43

It sounds like they r opened an account. No matter what explanation your mil gives your DH should still phone the bank tonight

whattodoo Thu 02-May-13 17:04:47

I've just checked, mine was with Equifax.

I did do a check about 4/5 years ago though, so maybe I already had an account, but I'd give it a go if I were you (and £5 cash back is a bonus!)

Whoknowswhocares Thu 02-May-13 17:08:33

Ok just so you know, it is absolutely impossible that this is an'accident'. The link shows what forms of ID you need to open an account for each individual branch, both online or in branch.
However much your oh might like to believe otherwise, they have definitely committed fraud and done this on purpose

HolidayArmadillo Thu 02-May-13 17:14:30

Have a look on checkmyfile, that should show up any accounts in your husbands name.

Cravey Thu 02-May-13 17:14:48

As I stated no matter why this was done if it is not reported by your husband and this gets found to be fraud he can and will be implicated.

TigerSwallowTail Thu 02-May-13 17:15:36

They've already asked your dh to launder money for them, now they've asked him to open a bank account which he has refused and now mysteriously a bank account has been opened in his name at their address which they've denied. I don't see what can come from your dh speaking to them first, they'll most probably just try and work out another way to use him to get money. Your dh needs to phone the bank which would hopefully put an end to this behaviour before your dh is left in a lot of debt or gets into trouble.

diddl Thu 02-May-13 17:18:07

Of course he should check-and without warning them!

In fact he should have checked as soon as he got the letter.

Why wouldn't he??

aldiwhore Thu 02-May-13 17:19:10

Wow. They're not just shite with money they're cheeky, selfish bloody bastards.

Not helpful I know!!

It's bad enough that they're dubious anyway, but I'd pretend not to know if I liked them, but they've implicated your family in their grubby dealings now so it really needs to be tackled doesn't it?

Sorry I can't offer advice on real terms. Stand your ground, and be there for your DH who will be utterly devastated I'm sure but it IS time to stand your ground and do the right thing. x

LividDil Thu 02-May-13 17:27:51

I'd also suggest your DH sets up a redirection service with Royal Mail so that all post to his name gets to him. Otherwise he'll never know what other arrangements his parents have been setting up in his name. I assume the letter they did pass on was a mistake on their part.

Cravey Thu 02-May-13 17:28:50

Also you need to check your dh didn't say yes he would help. I can't enforce enough the legal ramifications of this. Either way this account needs checking on to make sure it is closed.

quoteunquote Thu 02-May-13 17:29:55

Your dh needs to phone Santander and ask about it. And then immediately close the account. You can put the money somewhere safe and quietly wait for the PILs to ask about it. At which point they better have a good explanation!

DO this^^ What Berthabog said

Although I would be worrying about what ID they used, and what else they've used it for

and this is why you have to phone the police if they have opened an account, and don't let them in your house until they confess how they opened an account if they did,

I suggest you keep bills and ID locked away.

fuzzywuzzy Thu 02-May-13 17:32:32

The credit check gets done immediately online.

Of you redirect post thro the post office they will send a letter to your IL's house telling them that post to your husbands name will now be redirected and if this is incorrect to let them know.

HighJinx Thu 02-May-13 17:35:25

Now that you know they have done this in your DH's name I really think that you MUST take steps to sort it out officially.

Otherwise when the shit hits the fan your DH will not be able to claim he knew nothing about it and could be implicated in their deception and fraud.

MildDrPepperAddiction Thu 02-May-13 17:37:46

I think you should be able to check with Santander. There would be a reference or account number on the letter. Get your DH to ring and check to be sure.

SolomanDaisy Thu 02-May-13 17:37:56

You can select not to have a letter sent to the previous address when you arrange to have mail forwarded. They send it to the forwarding address instead.

Blatherskite Thu 02-May-13 17:40:55

"Of you redirect post thro the post office they will send a letter to your IL's house telling them that post to your husbands name will now be redirected and if this is incorrect to let them know"

But does that matter? He's already texted to ask for an explanation so they know he's onto them.

SolomanDaisy Thu 02-May-13 17:44:26

I think (but am not certain) that if they opened the account online the credit check would involve the electoral roll, so they would need to have added him to the electoral roll at their house.

Dannilion Thu 02-May-13 17:46:27

The reason we didn't think of it sooner is that we've just had a baby and can't make our heads from our arses at the moment, and yeah it doesn't really matter what MIL says as he'll be calling Santander anyways. I guess it's just utter disbelief that this could really be happening. MIL finishes work at 6, I'm trying to get a credit check done before then!

fudgeit Thu 02-May-13 17:46:48

srsly, is this a Santander thing? the mother can barely speak English, she went to Evans to buy a pair of shoes and they opened a store card - managed by Santander- for her! they got most of her address wrong and started calling her constantly to pay for a card she never she applied for. they were thoroughly unhelpful until i started tweeting about how they had taken advantage of her and how suddenly she owed approx £150 in charges for a £10 pair of shoes. fortunately they saw the error of their ways and it was soon sorted. def get your DH on the case about this.

cozietoesie Thu 02-May-13 17:58:15

I'm wondering whether Santander might not have internal procedures for going to the police anyway if someone phoned up to close an account and said that they had not opened it?

IDontDoIroning Thu 02-May-13 17:58:41

Of course it's on purpose - they asked if they could do it, he said no, they did it anyway,

can you really imagine the convo "oh look I accidentally opened a bank account in my sons name as one does"
"Hm what do I do ? Just leave it - commit identify fraud and breach the terms of my bankruptcy potentially cause lots of problem for my son with his credit rating or just leave it knowing its wrong?"
"Hm decisions decisions"

IDontDoIroning Thu 02-May-13 17:59:20

Or put it right

I mean

ekidna Thu 02-May-13 18:09:30

how grim.
its quite clear you have no choice but to report it.
santander will have to involve the fraud team and the pils will be in the utter shit. there's no way round it. they'll have to face up to it.

JerseySpud Thu 02-May-13 18:23:11

Oh my god.

I would be freaking completely at this point

ChasedByBees Thu 02-May-13 18:40:58

Terrible that they would put you in this situation sad

DontmindifIdo Thu 02-May-13 18:50:56

Experian didn't make us wait for a code, it's not free though, but if they do have form, it might be worth checking monthly anyway.

Your DH needs to call the bank tonight and get that account closed/frozen - explaining that he didn't open and it's been open frauduantly.

If they have done this, then I'd be tempted to tell your DH you've got no choice but to go to the police this time - they've crossed a line, they'd done something that doesn't just effect their financial security, but also that of their adult DS and their DGC - they really don't give a shit about you do they? You told them this could effect your tax credits, they are making you risk an allogation of benefit fraud because they think hiding money from their creditors is more important than if their DS risks being financially sound.

BTW - if they've managed to open a bank account in your DH's name, they might have been able to use that to apply for loans/credit cards, if they haven't now, then they might in the future, you need to be all over this. Police.

cozietoesie Thu 02-May-13 19:01:41

I'd agree (and have said so.) Police.

greenfolder Thu 02-May-13 19:09:53

bet you they have swapped a utility bill into his name to use as proof. the bank could not have accidentally opened an account in his name.

i would contact the bank and ask them what has happened, what proof was presented?

WireCatWhore Thu 02-May-13 19:14:18

This is just what you need when you've just had a baby.

This is fraud, they could go to jail.

You should be able to get a credit check done online via experian on a 30 say free trial, you can cancel online easily without charges.

cozietoesie Thu 02-May-13 19:20:31

I tried to cancel, TiaMaria and you couldn't do it online. Had to be by phone.

RenterNomad Thu 02-May-13 19:29:51
HaveTeaWillSurvive Thu 02-May-13 19:33:56

This makes me feel ill - your credit history has such long reaching impacts and it's seriously hard work to get errors removed.

I'm sure your DH doesn't want to believe the worst of his parents but this is incredible, bad enough to think of doing this and ask but then to do it anyway - WTF. Don't really see you've any choice other than to report to Santander and let them deal with it - may at least avoid the stress of going directly to the police yourselves.

Definitely get a post redirection and the online credit rating to give you peace of mind - you don't need something else to lose sleep over. I joined all the major reference agencies lately to check they'd removed my financial association to ex and got all reports instantly. Was easy enough to quit as well - you do have to call but there was no hard sell.

Oh my God, I can't believe they'd do that to their own son! Awful situation.

cocolepew Thu 02-May-13 19:36:01

What an awful thing to do. They are bloody criminals shock

lunar1 Thu 02-May-13 19:41:47

I hope this is the only thing they have done, have you got the credit report yet?

cozietoesie Thu 02-May-13 19:42:05

I'd be interested to know the MIL's role here - the OP is being desperately circumspect about her.

But that's neither here nor there really.

Just go to the police. They'll do the leg work for you both.

Metbird Thu 02-May-13 19:47:37

Unfortunately, it is surprisingly easy for family to steal your identity...after all they know all your personal information. My sister stole my ID and the first I knew of it were when the bailiffs called. Take this very seriously and report them now...

Timeforabiscuit Thu 02-May-13 19:51:05

This happened to my DH - His father opened up a student bank account in DH's name as he was going through "a rough time", DH delayed going to Uni by a year - by the time he applied for a student account his credit rating was trashed and no bank would touch him.

utterly utterly selfish thing to do.

cozietoesie Thu 02-May-13 19:53:57

Yes - it would be pretty easy for me to do that for my siblings for instance. Partly because I know personal details about them but more because they trust me.

Any self-serving breach of trust in such circumstances, though, and I believe you're relieved of family loyalties.

Metbird Thu 02-May-13 19:57:23

Funnily enough we don't speak.

Boggler Thu 02-May-13 19:58:28

If they have done this I think a call to the police will be required - parents or no parents.

shock Definitely not a mistake! I'd not even bother waiting for their excuses and would just sort it with the bank's fraud department.

Your DH needs to update his address so NO mail goes to his parents.

I've also opened accounts online, it's easy to do if you knew someone's details.

LookingForwardToMarch Thu 02-May-13 20:09:41

Did you get the credit report op?

Dannilion Thu 02-May-13 20:13:41

Didn't get a credit report no, but DP is on the phone to Santander right now and it turns out there is a bank account in his name, with his DOB and everything.

I am shaking with rage.

Metbird Thu 02-May-13 20:15:50

You poor thing sad but it is better to can now take control and get it sorted.

cozietoesie Thu 02-May-13 20:16:46

I'm not surprised you're filled with rage, OP. Let's hope that that's the full extent of it.

jojane Thu 02-May-13 20:17:52

Getting a bank account could just be the start, now they have bank statement s they can start tomget loans sand credit cards etc you need tomget it on record that it's a fraudulent address, even if it means getting in laws into trouble which your dh might be reluctant to do

buildingmycorestrength Thu 02-May-13 20:20:06

Oh dear Lord. This is awful. You poor thing having to deal with this and first baby.

They are vile.

SayMama Thu 02-May-13 20:21:16

Oh you poor things, you don't need this stress now with the new baby here (congratulations btw!)

I dont know if anyone has said it but Noddle credit check is free and instant. I think you need to check just incase they've done it before!

SugarPasteGreyhound Thu 02-May-13 20:23:15

OMG, how bloody cheeky is that? Has mil replied at all?

OhTinky Thu 02-May-13 20:24:02

There's a credit check company called Noddle. It does free instant credit checks. No catch that I could see, but did very cleverly list all bank accounts/mortgage/linked family members at my address etc within about 10mins - might be worth a go. Hoping that its only 1 account and not the tip of the iceberg! How worrying!

Have they closed it or suspended it or something?

you defo need to get the police involved. family or not it is fraud. you wouldnt think twice about it if it was a stranger.

i agree with the posters that mentioned loans and credit cards. jeez they could have borrowed 1000's in his name shock

they dont care... and they'll never learn unless you do something. act fast!

alienbanana Thu 02-May-13 20:29:00


This is unbelievable!

msrisotto Thu 02-May-13 20:30:14

Wow...just wow. What a new low, to defraud your own son. I am sure you are incandescent with rage and your poor husband is devastated. I do hope he tells Santander that he did not open the account, you have to protect yourselves.

ENormaSnob Thu 02-May-13 20:31:12

This is awful.

You need the police involved asap.

What a set of bastards they are. Absolutely no regards to the welfare of their son and grandchild.

filthypig Thu 02-May-13 20:32:44

this is identity theft surely. Awful.

sorry, but police are the only way to go now.

his parents have committed serious fraud.

imagine if they went overdrawn. you'd be liable and that's effectively stealing money from your kids' mouths. unbelievable.

As Cosytoesies said. Once they have breached your trust, they forfeit all right to any 'family loyalty'.

TidyDancer Thu 02-May-13 20:40:14

Jesus Christ. What shits they are.

I realise this is very difficult, but I would broach the subject of the police now.

cozietoesie Thu 02-May-13 20:40:14

I just signed up with noddle. Looks like a great little free service.

KeatsiePie Thu 02-May-13 20:48:22

That is appalling, I'm sorry.

Can you put a fraud alert on his name? That would prevent anyone from doing anything that involves accessing his credit without contacting him/you first. Each of the big three credit bureaus (Experian, Equifax, Transunion) will have a separate link for you to do that, after a quick look I think I would set it up with all three of them. It's supposed to be easy to do it.

From one of the sites: "An initial 90 day fraud alert indicates to anyone requesting your credit file that you suspect you are a victim of fraud. When you or someone else attempts to open a credit account in your name, increase the credit limit on an existing account, or obtain a new card on an existing account, the lender should takes steps to verify that you have authorized the request. If the creditor cannot verify this, the request should not be satisfied. You may also request one additional free credit file disclosure.

An extended fraud alert is similar to an initial 90 day alert, except that it lasts for 7 years, and to verify your request a creditor must contact you on the telephone number(s) you provide to Equifax when you requested the extended fraud alert. A valid police report showing that you have been a victim of identity theft is required to place an extended fraud alert. Also, you may request two additional free credit file disclosures, and your name is removed from prescreened offers of credit or insurance for 5 years."

Wow. Hard to fathom how a parent could do that to their child. I agree with others, you really need to report this - your poor dh could be signed up to all sorts and liable for the lot if he doesn't.

MikeOxard Thu 02-May-13 20:54:39

Bloody hell. What has the MIL said about it?

Dannilion Thu 02-May-13 20:59:56

Well it turns out the account was opened recently when PIL's went into the branch to open an account in FIL's name. The account has no money in it and no transactions have been made yet

DH has just got off the phone to MIL, who explained that the girl doing it was 'in a rush', and only realized that she had opened it in DH's name right at the end. Apparently she assured PIL'S that she had cancelled it.

When asked how the bank had managed to obtain all DP's details like DOB etc, MIL was stumped but insulted we could think they'd stoop that low. Even though they were going to anyways hmm

DH obviously wants to believe his parents. Me not so much.

cornyderpy Thu 02-May-13 21:01:53

you know that's an absolute crock of shit? There is absolutely no way that could happen if they were using FIL's ID.

So is DPs name the same as FILs then?

Definitely get mail forwarding so any post in dp's name sent to their address gets automatically sent on to you.

cozietoesie Thu 02-May-13 21:03:07

Just how did she get DH's name then? Is it the same as his father's? (I'm not even going near the DOB and the other proofs of identity etc.)

cozietoesie Thu 02-May-13 21:04:16

Check those credit reports, OP. I don't believe her.

This is awful sad

SolomanDaisy Thu 02-May-13 21:06:50

Umm, what a load of bollocks. They went in to open the account they can't get cos of their bankruptcy? And the cashier accidentally opened it in the name of an entirely different person which just happened to be their son's name? Why would anyone believe that?

AudreyParker Thu 02-May-13 21:07:09

This is serious. I really hope you go to the police.

CSIJanner Thu 02-May-13 21:07:43

Your DH may want to believe his parents but he can request copies of the identifying documents used to open the account. If they've used his birth certificate, photo ID etc then they are clearly lying. If this is the case, then family or not, they will need to be reported for fraud as Santander will flag this up against your husband.

Am really sorry you're going through this when you should be enjoying your new baby flowers Congrats btw

DontmindifIdo Thu 02-May-13 21:08:18

yep, if they were using ID from FIL, it might get opened with the wrong first name, but not the wrong DOB, she might also have typed in the wrong DOB, but to get the right one for your DH seems a little much of a coinsidence. Ask her to explain that, because you're going to be putting in a formal complaint to Santander and will need both of them to go in to make the complaint too.

Get a full credit report, find out what else might be going on.

Dannilion Thu 02-May-13 21:09:45

Nope theirs names are different, and don't get me started on the 30+ year age gap.

I don't believe it. I wish I could. MIL has offered to take DH into the branch and point out the woman on Saturday so DH is holding out until then, and asking me how I'm going to react if it's all proven to be an innocent mistake. hmm

myBOYSareBONKERS Thu 02-May-13 21:10:23

what UTTER crap!! I do hope your DH is not sucked in. Feel so sorry for him BUT his own family is at risk now and he needs to realise how serious this is and the ongoing implications it could have for you.

cozietoesie Thu 02-May-13 21:10:29

MIL is the eminence grise in that relationship is she?

Wibblypiglikesbananas Thu 02-May-13 21:11:45

Your DH is in denial. They have clearly set out to open an account in his name.

However, I'd also be calling the Santander processes into question as if they went into a branch and managed to open an account as they claim, Santander have broken a number of rules around money laundering by not carrying out appropriate identity checks. My DF is a bank auditor so knows this stuff backwards - trust me, Santander have messed up big time here too and you have recourse against them as well as the parents if this is all accurate.

More to the point though - what a shitty way to treat your own child. Your poor DH. I'm not surprised you're having trouble convincing him of his parents' dishonesty. But they have stolen his identity! Shocking.

Go to the police and get it sorted before you're any further along with the pregnancy and cut that toxic pair our of your lives. If they're prepared to risk your whole family's financial future, they're not worth the time of day.

AudreyParker Thu 02-May-13 21:12:38

They are criminals and they do not give the tiniest shit about either of you, or your dc.


myBOYSareBONKERS Thu 02-May-13 21:12:57

and when he goes to the branch on Saturday he can ask to see the copies of the documents that the account was opened with

BlueberryHill Thu 02-May-13 21:13:40

What is pointing out the woman going to achieve? Will your DH be able to talk to here about opening an account, one of many in the past month or so?

Different names, DOB? Don't they get them from the set forms of ID, due to anti money laundering legislation, banks have to be shit hot on this and get all the relevant forms of ID so that the account opened is for the person in front of them. One question worth asking is whether the cashier looked at the DOB and wondered if your FIL had been living it large for ages to have aged 30+ years.

lisaro Thu 02-May-13 21:14:14

You need to ask your husband if he'll still be in denial when YOU and HE are in the dock charged with tax credit fraud. Sorry, there's no way around this - he needs to soeak to Santander tonight, and get this sorted. And any money in the account would be frozen, as it's not his by his own admission. You BOTH need to check your full credit history immediately. Once again - will he only take note when bailiffs are at the door?

Wibblypiglikesbananas Thu 02-May-13 21:14:26

And quite honestly, if your DH can't - or won't - see what his parents have done, then you need to question whether you want your children brought up in this kind of environment. If fraud, identity theft and such a hideous level of deception won't make your DH see sense, where would he draw the line?

ENormaSnob Thu 02-May-13 21:15:13

What a load of shit.

I would be letting the police and the fraud team deal with it.

Dannilion Thu 02-May-13 21:16:37

cozie - MIL is the spokesperson. DH thinks FIL is the eminence grise behind this, as he has form for these sort of ideas.

I clearly don't know wtf goes through anyones heads these days.

BlueberryHill Thu 02-May-13 21:16:47

Have you run credit checks, including on your PILs address?

Get the CIFAS flag put on your name / address so that additional checks are run if anyone tries to take out credit in your name. PP gave all the details, we had it on ours, a complete pain in the ass at times but it was great for peace of mind.

Protect yourself, it doesn't matter if your DH does / doesn't believe them, get this in place yourself. Please.

They are utter bastards, who could lie to their child like that.

dont most accounts have a security question attatched too them? dm's mainden name, favourite place, favorite word etc?? would be interesting to see if there is one attatched to this one.

i dont know what going to the bank to find the woman is going to do. for starters, she's probably seen 1000's of people since the account was opened and wont remember anyway

Mimishimi Thu 02-May-13 21:24:18

It's imperative that you get those credit reports ASAP regardless of what your MIL says about use of the accounts. They sound like they feel entitled because they 'own' their son. As much as your DH doesn't want to believe that they could do this, it's going to feel so much worse for him if he gets legally implicated in their financial misdeeds. You need to find out the full scope of the false transactions and then report them for fraud. As a PP said, it's much easier when it's obviously organized crime than when it's family - the authorities will not look upon you kindly if they discover you have known for quite some time.

StuntGirl Thu 02-May-13 21:24:21

What a shitty thing to do to anyone let alone your own family angry

If I were your husband I would go to the bank and demand to see what documents were used to open the account. When he sees it in black and white he won't be able to deny it any longer.

As well as closing the account, alerting the fraud team and getting a credit check I would be looking into where and how I can report Santander for this spectacular breach of security.

cozietoesie Thu 02-May-13 21:25:27

Aw Heck, Dannilion. All I know is that she's reacting all wrong for innocence (leaving aside any facts) - but frankly, they sound so messed up that judging their reactions to your DH by normal standards is probably less than useful.

Go to the police - and don't wait until Saturday! Who knows what could happen tomorrow. (Why did she even suggest Saturday anyway. Anybody I know would have been banging on the bank door at 08.30.)

Wibblypiglikesbananas Thu 02-May-13 21:26:03

And if I was the woman in the bank who'd set this account up, I wouldn't want to admit to it as my job would now be on the line. It won't take the police long to investigate and discover this though. At the very least, she's looking at a disciplinary - at worst, getting fired for failing to implement money laundering identity theft checks properly.

zzzzz Thu 02-May-13 21:26:13

Poor Dh how utterly awful that he is hanging on to the fact that "it could all just be a mistake". sad

He knows perfectly well no one could open a bank account by mistake in their child's name.

Give him a hug and tell him very gently that he must face this. He will need you, poor man, to deal with the misery his parents have caused.

FWIW he sounds like a very strong and upright man and he needs to focus on the kind of man his dc will want him to be.

Snazzynewyear Thu 02-May-13 21:28:02

As myBOYS says, tell them that when they visit the branch DH can check the documentation used when opening the account so that he can refer to that in the official complaint he will be making to Santander.

Get the redirection of mail done yesterday. And if there is no option other than sending a letter to the 'former' address, then you'll need to send one yourself to test it is working, or ring the Post Office and at least partially explain the situation.

CSIJanner Thu 02-May-13 21:29:13

Get DH to ring up the branch beforehand so that they can get the paperwork out of the files so he can see it and the signature on the bottom.

Snazzynewyear Thu 02-May-13 21:30:57

I would get your DH to ring Santander in the meantime anyway and ask them to look into it as he is confused about how this has happened. That way they will investigate and it will not be down to you - or that's what you can tell PILs.

Bobyan Thu 02-May-13 21:31:51

I would be very very careful about visiting the branch with them, if they later change their story they could implicate your DH.

Did your DH tell Santander that he didn't open the account?

If he hasn't and then waits and goes into the branch and it is his parents committing fraud and he doesn't declare it there and then, he could be seen to be covering for them.

BlueberryHill Thu 02-May-13 21:33:11

Actually, your DH should go in himself tomorrow and ask them, he should take all his ID and compare them to those on file and as CSIJanner (very apt name in this case) says, the signature at the bottom will be decider.

Sorry that you are having to deal with this, very angry for you.

Bobyan Thu 02-May-13 21:34:37

Also if Santander are at fault they are looking at a massive fine and you may well get compensation, which should be another reason to report it.

sicutlilium Thu 02-May-13 21:37:49

Perhaps someone should email a link to this thread to

Hissy Thu 02-May-13 21:40:49

I'm so sorry, this is just awful for you both. It's like lobbing a hand grenade in the middle of the family.

OP, you know how this is going to go down, don't you? Stay calm. Stay very cool and just think things through. Your poor H is going to need all the support you can give him.

DontmindifIdo Thu 02-May-13 21:44:48

I'd calmly tell your DH that if he believes his mother, then ok, so a massive mistake has been made by Santandar, you are entitled to compensation, they should be able to show the ID that the account was opened with and see that it's got different dates of birth and name on it - so he needs to call them back or go in tomorrow (not waiting until Saturday) and start a complaint. Your MIL doesn't need to point out who opened the account, it'll be on their files as she'll have got commission on it.

If he really really believes his mother, he'll do this now, if he doesn't, you're taking it as proof he doesn't and is trying to keep his mum out of trouble. He can't have it both ways, either he is a victim of an almighty fuck up by the bank and they should be made to pay for their mistake, or his parents did this deliberately.

gallicgirl Thu 02-May-13 21:46:41

Not read all of thread so apologies if someone has mentioned this already. Is your FIL an undischarged bankrupt? If so, you might want to speak to their official receiver. They might have opened a bank account in your husband's name just because it's more convenient to have a current account, but if that's the case there are a couple if banks that do basic accounts for bankrupts. It would concern me more that they either want an overdraft facility it they're hiding money from the OR. Given the other behaviour, I think it's the latter.

Your DH really needs to go to Santander on his own or with you, not with his mother. Does he bank with Santander? It is much easier to open an additional account with somewhere that already has your ID than to open a new one.

Khaleese Thu 02-May-13 21:48:28

Words fail me. The most shameful behaviour.

You can't trust them, you know that. I would be pressing santander for a full investigation. Let them deal with this.

You must get the flags put against yourselves.

Dannilion Thu 02-May-13 21:51:07

MIL is saying that no I.D was asked for, the girl just rushed it through, realized her mistake and then got her manager to cancel it.

Only it hasn't been cancelled.

If this is actually true there must be a prize for the worlds biggest coincidence ever.

That just isn't true. Banks don't let you open accounts without ID.

And it is very difficult to forget your own name and DoB but coincidentally remember your son's and think they are your details. Perhaps your FIL needs to go to see a doctor for to have his memory checked.

Banks seem to want a form of photo ID and proof of address. So there is a real risk that they have bills coming in his name to provide the proof of address, this is very likely to be the tip of the iceberg.

Mimishimi Thu 02-May-13 21:56:20

I really wouldn't take anything your MIL has to say about the matter into account. Neither should your DH given their history.

So no id was asked for?

How does mil explain the fact they have your dh's dob on the account then? Because if they didn't ask for Id she's not only given them the wrong name but also date of birth. So either way she has fraudulently opened the account. I would actually bet my mortgage on this.

This is total and utter Bollocks. Your dh needs to go into the branch tomorrow first thing without mil and ask for this to be investigated. As others have said if he wants to believe this is a fuck up by the bank then that is fine but either way it needs investigating. And now.

fuzzpig Thu 02-May-13 21:57:15

I will eat every sodding hat, scarf and glove in the house if this was a mistake. Absolute bollocks.

Fuck, it's terrifying to think they have done this to you. Absolutely horrible. I hope they are arrested for fraud, I really do. This will only get worse.

BlueberryHill Thu 02-May-13 21:58:33

Bollocks, I was an auditor for a bank, utter, utter, bollocks. She is lying, she is going to be found out.

Ignore what she says.

What did your DH say to Santander, did he say that he didn't open the account and asked them to investigate? If he didn't, he should. You need ID to open an account, either they had it and the assistant didn't check it correctly or she acted in collusion with them. I think it is the former, but Santander need to investigate. If may implicate your PIL but tough, they are talking shit to try to get out of it.

Triumphoveradversity Thu 02-May-13 22:00:56

This is one of the lowest things I have ever read on MN. I agree he should not go along with them at all as could appear complicit. I opened an account with Santander about two years ago and had to make an appointment and I think they photocopied my ID at the time.

Your DH needs to remove all misguided family loyalty he has left to deal with this.

DontmindifIdo Thu 02-May-13 22:01:42

Then if they didn't ask for any ID, then they won't have any on file. Get DH to call back without his mum there and talk to them. tomorrow if need be, or go into branch tomorrow, he needs to get this sorted, because he has a good case for complaint against Santandar. They must be asked to investigate.

newbiefrugalgal Thu 02-May-13 22:02:18

Bloody hell

Wibblypiglikesbananas Thu 02-May-13 22:02:56

Had a rethink. I would go to the police tonight and then when you go to Santander in the morning, you will have the details of the investigating officer two they can get in touch with. I really wouldn't sit on this any longer as the PILs could be doing all sorts online right now.

natwebb79 Thu 02-May-13 22:03:25

I went into my bank with DH to be last week to turn my account into a joint account. Even with me present he had to provide photo ID and proof of address. We both had to go through a Rainforest's worth of paper and both sign it. I had to redo my signature to prove that I was the account holder. Seriously, they are talking out of their backsides and need to be reported. So sorry OP.

Wow sad

Not good.

cozietoesie Thu 02-May-13 22:06:54


I think that regardless of what may have happened here (and I've made my own views clear) your DH and your relationship with his parents is now damaged beyond repair if only from this incident.

Myself I think that's a good thing from all that you have said including the events previous to this.

It does also mean that you can just go for it, tomorrow. There's nothing left to protect.

Ledkr Thu 02-May-13 22:07:40

So not only are they trying to screw her own son over but trying to lose some poor fucker her job too. Nice people.
Op id be concerned that his inability to see the truth despite such damning evidence will prevail no matter what?
Why did they not say what had happened when they saw the letter come to your house?

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CSIJanner Thu 02-May-13 22:10:25

Call the police and then goto Santander first thing in the morning with the letter. It's v clear that nothing's been cancelled. Inform them of the officers name who you have reported the potential fraudto and demand to see all documentation pertaining to your husband under the Data Protection Act 1998.

Double check your credit scores etc tonight to see if a credit account has been taken out against either of your names. And I am really sorry to suggest this, but also check against the name of your newborn. People can get to rock bottom and sink low. Set alerts against all credit check accounts so that you will be notified the moment a credit check for an account goes against any of your names.

If its Santanders mistake, then you get payout. If it is unfortunately the PIL's then I'm sorry, but they asked, DH said no and they went ahead. A lesson needs to be learned before they start using their grandchild for credit checks as well.

i agree with wibbly... there are a lot of hours between now and saturday. they know they've been found out... they could do anything in that time

WafflyVersatile Thu 02-May-13 22:17:22

At the very least you need to get credit checks from the 3 main agencies (I think you used to be able to do this online from one place for about £20) and you need to put a note on the credit record that DH does not live at his parents address. And then do regular checks as I think bank statements can be used for about 3 months as proof of address for other things.

/not a legal or finance expert]

Charlesroi Thu 02-May-13 22:18:37

No, not possible to open an account with no ID. They'll run an e-check on the electoral roll and if the person doesn't appear at that address you'll have to produce even more paperwork to prove your address.

Total horseshit, I'm afraid.

iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii Thu 02-May-13 22:30:01

Wow, what a awful situation.

I really feel for you.

My thieving bastard BIL has stolen 'used' money that was in his mums current account (my MIL) He has done this for years. Everyone knows about it but it would cause too much family upset if anyone actually dealt with it. confused

Deep down, i bet your DH knows the truth. sad

Callthemidlife Thu 02-May-13 22:39:09

KYC (know your client) and Money laundering rules mean you need multiple ID to open an account. birth certificate, passport and utility bill are the standard docs they ask for generally to open an account (can supplement with things like driving licence, benefits ID, etc). Even if they have his details from an old account they have to run these checks fresh for a new account. I opened an account in my married name and had to do this, despite being with the same bank for 20 years (and having same personal manager for 5 years).

They are clearly lying. I would tell the parents that you are going in to bank to complain at their incompetence and will be seeking substantial compensation from the bank for their negligence as they have broken all their money laundering rules. Then sit back and wait for them to call back and come clean as they will realise they need to do this in order to try to stop things going out of their control.

What you do then, Christ knows. At least you can let yourself be indignant and apoplectic, your DH is going to have to process some far darker stuff. Good luck.

JerseySpud Thu 02-May-13 22:41:47

To agree with the others, you can not open an account with no ID whatsoever and you also have to sign forms. Surely if she was cancelling the account they wouldn't have signed the forms?

So this lady at the bank 'accidentally' entered your dh's details instead of your fil's including name and dob, despite her having never met your dh and him not banking with Santander?! Hmmmm...

Dannilion Thu 02-May-13 22:53:26

DH agrees that we'll go alone together and ask the bank what the hell has happened and for a copy of the I.D used etc. I think he feels better about doing this as he hasn't got to be face to face with his parents when it all unfolds if that makes sense.

He has told the bank to close the account and that he didn't open it, but after being on hold to the fraud team for half an hour on a premium rate number he decided to just go in branch and sort it. Not what I would have done but hey.

I've watched him try to process this over in his head tonight and it's really saddening. He has said that if they have really done this then that would be the end of our relationship with them.

Christelle2207 Thu 02-May-13 22:53:33

This smells very very bad.
However, I recently opened an account with Santander (online) and didn't have to produce ID or sign anything, to my surprise.
Not that that makes it ok, but certainly easy to do.
For fil to have applied with your dh's name, dob and address instead of fIL's by mistake ???? Never.

Maggie111 Thu 02-May-13 22:53:38

FGS do the credit check!!!!!!

FairPhyllis Thu 02-May-13 22:54:36

I really think you need to call the police tonight before PIL have an opportunity to do anything more.

You need to get it on record ASAP that you knew nothing about this. I would not put it past PIL to claim that your DH was an accomplice. They will quite happily fuck you over if you don't protect yourselves.

Christelle2207 Thu 02-May-13 22:54:54

If it turns out as feared I would, in your situation, never want them in my house again.
Feel very sad for your dh.

SmellsLikeTeenStrop Thu 02-May-13 22:57:45

I bank with a building society, when I opened a second account with that bank I didn't need to show any ID. Has your DH ever had an account with Santander or whatever it was before it turned in to Santander?

Christelle2207 Thu 02-May-13 22:59:46

See my post, I didn't have to show any ID or sign anything and didn't have another account with Santander.

iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii Thu 02-May-13 23:04:54

If this is a deliberate act by your In Laws it doesn't mean your DH has to end his relationship with them. If he did maintain contact it would just have to be done with the knowledge of what his parents have done. It would have to be under his terms.

If I were you though, I would not want to see them again.

iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii Thu 02-May-13 23:07:16

Christelle2207. Did you already have an account with Santander before opening your online account? I would be curious to know what type of account it was?

CSIJanner Thu 02-May-13 23:10:20

Dannilion please do the credit checks in *all of your names. It might be important. And when I say all, I mean your husband, yourself and your baby.

And ask to see the new account application to see if it had been signed.

BelleJolie Thu 02-May-13 23:13:00

MIL is lying and her story has so many obvious holes it's actually astonishing she thinks it's credible. How on earth would your DH's name even come into it when FIL is opening a bank account?? It doesn't make sense! What, were they just chatting about their son to make small talk and did the teller then just somehow put it on the application form...? Along with his DOB? Bollocks.

I'm sorry, though. It's going to be very hard for your DH to face up to this one because it is a huge breach of trust. They clearly have no regard towards their son and his new family and the potential situation they are putting you all in. Utterly shameful of them.

It needs to be dealt with in order for you both to protect yourselves.

Christelle2207 Thu 02-May-13 23:23:36

I opened a standard "123" current account jointly with dh and at no point did I have to show Id, nor did he. Never been to a branch. No other accounts with Santander.
However I may have entered NI number which would have checked that names and addresses matched- I recall something about having to send in ID if our details couldn't be "verified" but they were ok.

KenAdams Thu 02-May-13 23:25:20

shock that's insane! Utter cheek! I'd be fuming too.

As awful as this is I'm glad for you that you found out now.

We found out when we put ourselves on the electoral roll after living overseas for a year....

Except we didn't get a bank letter, we got DEBT COLLECTORS for various credit card companies looking to collect eight and a half grand DH apparently borrowed whilst living at his mother's - except he hadn't lived there for years.

Sorting it out was hugely stressful, every time we thought it was dealt with up popped yet another creditor. It went on for over a year and ended up with him disassociating himself from his parents.

I couldn't believe anyone could do this to their kids, but they do.

MidniteScribbler Thu 02-May-13 23:45:55

Quite frankly I think that ending this relationship would be better in the long run. Anyone that could do this is not someone I would want as an influence in my child's life. They need to learn that their are consequences for their actions, which may include criminal charges. They really are the worms that infest the dog shite that is on the shoes of the lowest of the low.

MrsPoglesWood Thu 02-May-13 23:50:01

What everyone else says. Please do credit checks as there may be other accounts you know nothing about.

For Experian you have to enter card details but the first 30 days are free. You can cancel before they start charging. I did, wasn't a problem.

Cravey Fri 03-May-13 00:00:13

Your husband needs to make an appt with the bank concerned go in and ask to see all paperwork etc that refers to him. Once this have been done he needs to ask the bank to call the police although he may find they have already done so. He needs to do this ASAP in order for it to be seen that he is not a part of this. It's fraud pure and simple and the last thing you need is for him to be dragged into it in terms of being complicit.

K8Middleton Fri 03-May-13 00:02:54

I used to work for Santander and dh still does. This is my advice:

1. Do not go to the branch.
2. Your dh should deal directly with the fraud department and tell them everything he knows and get them to deal with it and closing the account down.
3. Do not ask for copies of ID seen etc at this stage (they are not allowed to keep that at the branch so no point and also, although you have been defrauded there may be more to it, so let the investigation run first)
4. Do not go to the police yet
5. Do not touch a penny of any money that comes into the account
6. Ask the fraud department for written confirmation that the account has been closed, that it was opened fraudulently and the action that has been taken to protect his credit rating.
7. Contact Equifax, Experian and the other credit reference agency I forget the name of and ask them to place a caution on file due to identity theft.

You are unlikely to get any compensation from Santander if they were not at fault (if they followed anti-money laundering procedures, took all reasonable precautions and immediately put right the problem as soon as they were made aware) and if there are no damages. It is quite possible they are the victim in this too and I'm no great fan of Santander so it pains me to have to stick up for them... even with caveats.

Do not deal with the branch. This will either inflame the situation or, more likely, just hold things up. There is also the possibilty that the person who opened the account was involved in the fraud and you do not want to tip them off.

Fraud will liaise with the police and give advice. Let them sort out the financial stuff and once you have all the information (independently verified - do not trust pil) you can decide what to about pil.

Think carefully about going to the police. At the moment you don't know what happened. Once you do know you may need to make that decision and consider all the wider implications. You don't need to do that yet.

Regarding identification for account opening they use electronic identification which checks things like dob and other personal info to electoral records, credit reference agency info and other databases. If you doesn't pass that then you have to provide proof of identity and address. All new customers must be verified (ie is that person in front of you the person they claim to be?) using preferably photo ID (usually passport/driving licence) or signature (credit/debit card for example). They should be checking things like dob, sex and other stuff matches too.

It used to be the case that branches should not must not open accounts for people not physically present (can't ask dh he's asleep) so the wrong dob is ringing alarm bells for me and is another reason to stay the hell away from the employee who opened the account. If it happened as mil says the employee is either negligent or involved. Or mil's lying.

K8Middleton Fri 03-May-13 00:10:03

There should be a 24 hr fraud number that's 01908 (Milton Keynes). They should also ca you back if you ask.

I can ask dh tomorrow but it used to be 01908 237 963 can't remember what I did yesterday but can remember that from years ago hmm

Wibblypiglikesbananas Fri 03-May-13 00:54:12

k8middleton - why do you advise holding off on contacting the police? Surely the only implications of this would be that PIL get their just desserts?! Yes, family ties may be severed - but they were severed the minute the PILs acted like they did.

The OP did say earlier that her DH had spent ages on the 'phone trying to get through to someone in fraud and given it was a premium rate number, gave up and decided to go into the bank in person. Again, surely management would have a procedure to put in place in this instance? I'd want to talk to someone in person if this was me, not some godforsaken call centre automaton - can you imagine anything more frustrating?

K8Middleton Fri 03-May-13 01:10:56

You mean further to what I've already said? Because at the moment they are not in full possession of the facts and it will wait for a bit... but mainly because the bank fraud department should deal with all that which will probably be much less stressful for OP and her dh. I don't have any advice about the relationship side of this (and if the suspicions that PIL have been up to no good are true it's a massive betrayal) but I do know about the boring, practical stuff which might be useful.

I'd want to talk to someone in person if this was me, not some godforsaken call centre automaton - can you imagine anything more frustrating? Err yes I can. From direct experience. I can imagine talking to someone in person who might as well be a call centre IVR system. Or talking to someone who lies to you because they have done something wrong. I can imagine having to relay the whole thing once and then again to fraud. I can imagine lots of sympathetic nodding and nothing being done. Btw, I'm not suggesting going through to the generic call centre. I am suggesting speaking to the fraud department directly and have offered to get the direct number.

zzzzz Fri 03-May-13 01:22:53

Why "should" the bank fraud department deal with all that?

Surely the police are a perfectly sensible port of call?

piprabbit Fri 03-May-13 01:33:01

There is a slim chance there is a reasonable explanation.
When I married and changed my name, NatWest managed to change my records to show I was married to and cohabiting with my DH's deceased father (who had a different name to DH). It was bizarre and took a lot of sorting.

However, your DH should act on the information he has i.e. phone Santander and ask them 'what account' and see where it leads, which may be towards PILs.

ratbagcatbag Fri 03-May-13 01:34:34

Definitely do the credit check, and I'd double check with electrolyte roll that DH is not still down at his parents house.

ratbagcatbag Fri 03-May-13 01:35:18

Erm electrol roll smile even

K8Middleton Fri 03-May-13 01:35:53

They should deal with it because they will know more than the OP and more than the OP will ever know - they will not reveal commercially sensitive or fraud prevention information or other confidential information that might be relevant but not specifically about the op to the op (if that makes sense - I'm not about to blab all the bank's my secrets grin). They will have to be involved any way and they have an obligation to report fraud to the police on behalf of the customer. I'm not saying don't go to the police, I'm saying don't go yet because it's too early.

Of course this is just my opinion based on 10 years working in the industry plus a further 4 listening to dh blather on. Obviously different banks differ but I do know about this particular bank and if it was me I would do what I have described.

K8Middleton Fri 03-May-13 01:37:00

x-posted. That was in reply to zzzzz. Which as it happens is what I'm about to do.

DoubleLifeIsALifeHalved Fri 03-May-13 01:40:34

Oh lord, this sounds awful, good luck with first enquiries tomorrow... So stressful and upsetting for you & dh.

geologygirl Fri 03-May-13 01:54:20

Just reading this thread and I definitely think the staff member could be involved. This is probably why MIL is offering to point her out - that way your DH deals with her directly, tips her off so she can then cover tracks.

Fraud department NOW

Credit checks now too. Can be done for just need to ring up and cancel before trial period ends

zzzzz Fri 03-May-13 01:54:36

K8 I'm sorry I really don't understand your point. I understand your experience which is vastly superior to mine. I just would have assumed that the police were best placed to tell you how to proceed with things, given that their job is to investigate crime? I'm sure the in house fraud department are also capable of pursuing things but I would want someone a bit more independent.

The bank obviously have a part to play in this given that a bank account has been opened without the named individual being aware of it.

piprabbit Fri 03-May-13 02:03:04

zzzzz, since 1st April local police are no longer the first point of contact for investigating fraud.
Instead, you should call Action Fraud on 0300 123 2040, which is part of the Home Office, and they will log all the details and give you a crime reference number.

There seems to be some dispute about whether fraud reported this way is actively investigated or if it is just lost in a drawer somewhere. It is possible that the frauds reported to Action Fraud are so new that they haven't worked their way through the system yet, which is why victims are finding it hard to see what action is actually being taken.

Either way, I think K8's advice to involve the bank's fraud dept. initially seems very sensible. Hopefully the bank has reputational reasons for being tough on fraud and won't just let it drift.

DoubleLifeIsALifeHalved Fri 03-May-13 03:36:07

When my account was emptied recently, it was the banks fraud team who investigated and took responsibility for involving police if they decided it was necessary. It's the way it's done with banks now, as it's in their interests to pursue strongly any fraud committed. A big multinational is far better placed to investigate than a single person (& an over stretched police force). They are a completely separate team from any other and therefore don't have a conflict of interest, they have immediate acces to the account and all details of that, can trace transactions and check theyre authentic and legality etc. the local police wouldn't be able to do any of that without major difficulties.

If I'd have thought the bank could be in any way to blame then They would not have been the right people to investigate and the police etc would be the way to go.

It seems sensible to deal with the fraud team first as that's the reason for their existence, and as the situation develops make a decision on whether police are the right next step. From the info you've given here / know yourself at the moment, it sounds very likely the bank is not to blame.

Good luck...

Thepursuitofhappiness Fri 03-May-13 05:31:13

Understand the wish to go into branch, there is something reassuring abou dealing with massive issues in person with bank manager rather than over the phone. You may be able to call fraud line from bank (ridiculous it's a premium rate number...)

Ridiculous for PIL to assure its a coincidence. Maybe mistakes are mad in the bank of this nature once every hundred thousand or so...but toa person who asked whether they could money launder and open an a account in another person's name. Obviously not.

Ridiculous of PIL to not screen letters for your DH addressed from Santander though. Not the brightest if you are money laundering.

zipzap Fri 03-May-13 07:06:27

Hmm. Has your dh checked that your PIL haven't put him onto the electoral role at their house - I'm assuming that when you say they brought the post over it went to their house.

Because it would be easy for them to just add another line onto their form, there's already 2 of the at the house so wouldn't up their council tax and everything would go to their house so you wouldn't ever know. unless they were silly enough to bring it over

And then that way they could then do all sorts of things more easily as they would be able to pass through the 'living at this address and on the electoral role' hoop that needs to be jumped through.

Also - have you thought about checking your own credit reference as if they can do it to your dh, they can do it to you too as I'm sure they will know enough about you. And if they can do it to their ds then I bet they'd have no compunction in doing it to their dil.

Do you think they bright the letter over as they got cold feet and decided they couldn't go through with it at the last minute?

Actually, I'm inclined to suspect the account wasnt opened in branch, or if it was, it didn't happen in the way mil says. To me, the offer to point out the woman who served her smacks of panic. I'd be willing to bet that if your dh took her up on the offer (which he definitely should not) when they got to the branch she'd either say the person who served her wasnt Worthing "must be her day off" or would point out a random person but persuade dh not to speak to her "it would be embarrassing" "you'll get her in trouble" "her manager is already aware, sure they came over to cancel the account"
Your poor dh. Please make sure the fraud team follow through on this, and please do those credit checks!

Ledkr Fri 03-May-13 07:43:22

After this thread I shall tomorrow welcome my pils for the weekend.
I shall embrace their bossiness, greediness, procrastinating, bathroom hogging, overstaying.
If they are still sat i my house at 7 pm Monday when I'm clearly stressed and trying to get ready for school and work, I shall stil kill them but painless and with dignity. grin

cozietoesie Fri 03-May-13 07:49:04

....I shall stil kill them but painless and with dignity.......

Now that raised a real laugh here with me.


ChasedByBees Fri 03-May-13 07:51:47

I can't understand how your DH is semi-believing this. I guess he's in denial? There's no way, absolutely no way their story could be true.

Ledkr Fri 03-May-13 07:54:39

Good. Would you like them?
They maybe safe if they leave when I go to my (imaginary) BBQ
Trouble is last time I went off for a bit (so they'd leave) they sat here until 4pm (I left at ten) so I was locked out if my own sodding house shock
They will be leaving with me this time mark my words.

Xiaoxiong Fri 03-May-13 08:05:12

Whenever I read shocking stories like this I imagine the OP and her DH looking at their PFB and imagining someday behaving the same way towards their own child. And only then being able to emerge from the denial confused

OP I hope your DH is sitting on the phone (even if premium rate since you stand to potentially lose a hell of a lot more money than that!) to the Santander fraud department right now. It sounds like going into the branch could be frustrating and useless at best, and positively dangerous at worst if they manage to somehow construe his visit as proof that he agreed to this in the first place or that his "signature" was done at that time.

Oh and all the credit checks too. This is just the one you've found out about so who knows what else is out there confused

Wowserz129 Fri 03-May-13 08:08:55

They are clearly lying. There is no way they would ask you to open a account in your DH name and then magically there is a new account opened in your DH name but its all a big misunderstanding. Yeah right!

That is the lowest of the low. Committing fraud against your son, there is no way I would be letting then near me!

LIZS Fri 03-May-13 08:11:43

There is no way they could "accidently" have it set up in his name , with his DOB etc. Maybe they thought they'd been rumbled or had a late pang of conscience hence the fuss over trying to cancel or maybe they are lying about that too. I doubt this is the first time they have tried this and it will be to hide away funds from the court and creditors or get loans they cannot support. If your dh chooses to believe them it will have al sorts of ramifications - not least that any income is taxable, liability for any loans and overdrafts, credit history etc

cozietoesie Fri 03-May-13 08:25:55


If you're at a loose end for two or three minutes, why not try that Noddle credit check for you and/or DH. It only takes a few minutes (I opened one last night) and it's really pretty good for free. Will keep you occupied.

Blu Fri 03-May-13 08:29:50

OP, all v difficult and it is understandable that your DH would wish to seize any chance that it could be an accident.

I would try to avoid the focus of this being the morality if your PILS , eg any question if 'how will you feel if it is an innocent mistake' and simply focus, for now, on the facts. An account has been opened, your DH needs to know that it is closed, that there is no stain on his credit eating, and the bank need to know that it was not your DH who opened the account. NONE this is the business of your MIL. so no going into the branch with her. And dealing with the account itself avoids MILs melodramatic hoo ha as in 'how could you think...'

K8middleton's advice seems good and based on a knowledge of the system.

Leave the relationship with the PILs until it is sorted. In any case once your DH has sorted put the factual aspects with the bank the bank may well deal with PIL.

Just calmly proceed with what needs to be done wet to the account.

Metbird Fri 03-May-13 08:36:00

I would really follow K8Middleton's advice OP. When my sister stole my identity, I couldn't get the police to do anything. The fraud was committed by my sister against the company with whom she borrowed money from. Therefore I should imagine that it would be the same in this case, and the PIL have defrauded Santander...not DH. Phone the fraud number and get them on to it. You may well want the satisfaction of a confrontation, but this way the professionals carry out the investigation while you piece your life back together without additional stress.

I am just so sorry for you.

sudaname Fri 03-May-13 08:46:29

I feel your pain - or more your DHs, l have watched my DH for years now - an intelligent, very savvy man, soak up the most outrageous crocks of shit from his son about car insurance letters, road tax final reminders, speeding tickets, bailiffs,debt collector mail coming to our address. He always has an excuse or unbelievable series of events up his sleeve to explain this.
His son, very obviously to me and the rest of the world with at least one brain cell is using our address for purposes of shaking off debts, traffic penalties and to keep his car insurance costs down (we live in an area of much lower insurance costs than him). He hasn't lived here for two years.
I guess it's just very hard to believe someone you love is blatantly dishonest most of all to yourself, maybe it's just too hurtful.

DontmindifIdo Fri 03-May-13 08:58:21

OP - suggest to your DH it's better to call up those fraud helplines during the working day rather than the evenings, because most people wait until they are back from work at home to call, can he call today during normal working hours, (avoiding lunchtime) because he'll be kept on hold a lot less and is more likely to get the ball rolling today than going into branch this afternoon/tomorrow.

As others have said, it could well be hte 'girl' in Santandar is in on it too, or if MIL goes postal, she'll be onthe back foot and will apologise for her 'mistake' in face of an angry customer, which when investigated will turn out not to be a mistake at all...

buildingmycorestrength Fri 03-May-13 09:12:00

I have seen other posters on here whose husbands have happily colluded in their parents' fraudulent behaviours to the detriment of their several disabled children. It is a horrible psychological blind spot.

You and your DH are likely to have a v hard time but I agree you should focus on facts right now.

Zalen Fri 03-May-13 09:31:12

*Your dh needs to phone Santander and ask about it. And then immediately close the account. You can put the money somewhere safe and quietly wait for the PILs to ask about it. At which point they better have a good explanation!

DO this^^ What Berthabog said*

Just seen this advise repeated and have to say, in my opinion it's really bad advice. You can't have it both ways, either your dh knows nothing about the account, had nothing to do with opening it, the account is fraudulent and he wants nothing to do with it, or he wants the money from the account in which case it must be his account and he must have opened it anything else would be stealing!

LadyFlumpalot Fri 03-May-13 09:38:04

OP - please can I just also say that you and DH have a legal obligation to report suspicious activities. If your PIL are at any point investigated and it comes out that they asked your DH for these favours, he would be seen as complicit and could face a jail sentence.

I work in the financial industry and it is drilled into us on a half yearly basis how important it is to report ANYTHING we think may be related to fraud or money laundering.

Even if you decided that PIL were legit, if it turns out they are not and an investigation decides that it would have been reasonable for you to have suspicions, you could be in trouble.

It's a really shit thing your PIL have done.

Dannilion Fri 03-May-13 10:10:00

Hello everyone, sorry for disappearing. Had a bad night of a growth spurting refluxy velcro baby and there just aren't enough matchsticks to prop my eyes open.

Will do that noddle thing ASAP.

DH is at work today and unfortunately works in a trade that would be very dangerous to use your phone in, but I'll try and persuade him to take a break and call the fraud team. And before anyone says 'how can he be at work whilst this is going on', he's self employed and we're skint. He needs to work. He didn't even take any paternity leave after I had an EMCS!

I can totally appreciate that they would be the best people to talk to, but a large part of his world has come crashing down around him and it's difficult to be both assertive and considerate of his emotions. Would they take a report from me or would it have to be DH?

iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii Fri 03-May-13 10:11:16

blu and k8Middleton have given excellent advice. I agree with the idea that you focus on finding out the facts rather than thinking about what scumbags the InLaws appear to be.

ConferencePear Fri 03-May-13 10:14:03

You've been offered some good advice here and I appreciate that you need to be sensitive to your OH's feelings I think you absolutely must get this started today. If you don't you may begin to look like accomplices.

iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii Fri 03-May-13 10:14:08

You could phone and ask? The fraud number isn't premium rate (I don't think).
Good luck.

BTW. I completely understand if you can't deal with this the 'best' way, it's not always possible when there is so much emotional stuff involved.

diddl Fri 03-May-13 10:43:01

Well I appreciate it's a shock for him, but he needs to protect himself, you & his baby!

They asked him to launder money-so it's not exactly implausible that they might have done this-nor has it come from nowhere!

For me the laundering money request would have been a reason to cut contact!

They only care about themselves!

Dannilion Fri 03-May-13 10:59:42

Sorry I just realised my last seemed really arsey. It wasn't meant to be, I really am grateful for all the advice. I'd probably still be staring at the wall sweating under my breath if it wasn't for mumsnet smile

Dannilion Fri 03-May-13 11:00:29

Swearing! Although it is quite hot today..

cozietoesie Fri 03-May-13 11:02:45

It didn't sound off at all, Danillion. I can only guess the stress you must be under right now so if you want to offload a little bit here, you just go straight ahead.


zipzap Fri 03-May-13 11:23:46

I would ring up the fraud department on your dh's behalf now, especially if your dh is in a job where it is very difficult to get to the phone, let alone for a call that you could be on hold waiting for a very long time and you would like to make it in reasonable privacy, where you can think, make notes and not be rushed and stressed about making a call from work when you shouldn't be.

Tell them that you tried to call last night but that you were on hold for half an hour and couldn't wait any longer, especially on a premium number (If they tell you that it's not, then that's great, but from what you've posted here, you obviously thought that the number you were calling was - hopefully you'll be able to use the local number somebody else put on the thread for you so that won't be as expensive).

If you explain the situation - that you only found out last night, you spoke to PIL who explained they thought it had been opened up in mistake and cancelled, then looked up on what to do so tried to call but had to give up after half an hour to go to bed/too expensive/baby screaming etc.

Which brings you to today - you are phoning on behalf of your dh as he is at work without access to a phone, you are ringing to get the ball rolling. You appreciate that they will need to speak to him, but you want to find out if you can open a case file, get a flag put onto the account asap in case anybody tries anything with it, and to find out if they can ring you back this evening (or whenever, I assume if dh is working today and you have young dc then he will be home this evening) or to find out when a good time to call out of working hours is, and typically how long they expect somebody to hold on whilst on hold to speak to them. Also find out from them whether or not you should be reporting it to the police and what your next steps should be.

Then that will show that you are making an effort, trying to get into contact with them asap despite difficulties of work and babies. Plus hopefully it will make it easier to contact someone or be contacted by someone this evening for your dh. And you will know if you need to go to the police or not, go into the bank or not and so on.

With regard to your PIL and MIL's offer to point out the girl in the bank, I'd just say that you were able to speak to someone on the phone about it, and that now the bank obviously want the fraud team on it (omitting to mention that it was the fraud team you rang directly grin) so that for the moment they don't want her to point out the girl at the bank, but that obviously they will want to speak to her and as part of that they may well want her to point out the girl at the bank at a later stage in their investigations, depending on what they find... If it was all a massive coincidence and cock up then no problem, they can improve their procedures to stop it happening again, that's a legitimate thing for the fraud squad to be investigating because it could happen again and next time it might turn into a fraud situation.

Then that gets you & dh off the hook from going to the bank with MIL, and hopefully scare your mil if she has done anything dodgy to make her think twice about doing anything like it again, whereas if she hasn't done anything and it was a genuine accident then she doesn't need to worry as they'll be investigating where their procedures let them down.

Good luck - sounds like lots of stress at a time when you really don't need it!

BlueberryHill Fri 03-May-13 11:37:00

Agree with zipzap, KMiddleton, great advice there. Try to get the ball rolling, I have done it when DHs wallet was stolen, he wasn't in a position to get his cards cancelled there and then, so I called all the issuers. All cancelled on my say so, some were joint accounts, bar one who put the card on hold for 24 hours to allow DH to call and confirm later.

I wouldn't mention the fraud team to MIL, you could say that you wanted to be sure the account was closed so contacted the 'accounts closing team'.

It stops any comeback from your PIL at the moment and MIL doing the hysterical distraction thing as it looks as though you are going along with their story. It gives you and your DH some breathing time whilst Santander investigate. It may not scare your PIL not to try anything again, but by the sound of it they keep trying anyway and you might need something stronger in the future depending on what the bank say.

CheeseandPickledOnion Fri 03-May-13 11:56:59

OMG, this is just awful. I cannot see how it can be anything other than his PIL lying. I hope your DH can cope when the truth comes out.

K8Middleton Fri 03-May-13 12:22:14

Yes give them a ring. They won't discuss the account with you but you can give them the information. And yes I meant to say it you just deal with it as if you knew nothing about the pils (except telling the bank - do tell them everything) you can avoid all the unpleasantness for a little while to give dh some breathing space.

It's not unusual for people to be unable to come to terms with people they trust defrauding them - so keeping it separate can help. In the past I've had to sign big cheques where I strongly suspected the account holder of being bullied or coerced and so I have talked to the account holder alone to make sure they understand exactly what is happening. Even when it is blindingly obvious people can still be in denial. It's heartbreaking.

It is possible it's a mistake if a series of unlikely coincidences occurred: previous account at Abbey, Alliance & Leicester or Bradford & Bingley causing dh to be on the database; enough credit history at old address for credit score to go through (possible if pil are bringing round letters for dh); bank employee picking the wrong customer and not spotting the wrong name and DOB; the system crashing when trying to cancel account... and nobody noticing... but it would be extremely unlikely. It would also take about 5 mins for fraud to tell because for a current account you need lots of info in addition to standard 'know your customer' details (name, DOB, nationality, occupation, account funding). If that's all dh's info then on the balance of probabilities it's no accident. Particularly because fil's financial situation would make getting any account other than a basic very, very difficult and it would be unlikely to be approved on the spot.

So, proceed as if it is possibly a mistake for now and deal with pils when and if you need to later. Hopefully that will make things a tiny bit easier.

Tanith Fri 03-May-13 12:22:38

I don't think the lady from Santander is involved.
It is very easy to steal someone's identity, once you have their personal details - and these are his parents who, not only know him thoroughly but also receive his mail, too.

K8Middleton Fri 03-May-13 12:36:21

It's unlikely but not impossible. Pils much more likely IMO sad

But best to wait and see before doing anything other than speaking to bank.

i would advise not telling your pil's anything else from this moment on. you cant trust them... and to be honest, involved or not, they do not need any further information or updates wrt this. even if they come to you (which screams guilty imo) wanting to discuss it or needing updates, just say its being dealt with and leave it at that.

good luck

Cravey Fri 03-May-13 13:08:31

Said it before and wil say it again I cannot stress enough that this is sorted ASAP. It's not only a potential fraud case but it involves people who are bankrupt which makes it ten times worse. If your husband is even thought to be involved in some way there will be the biggest heap of shit on your heads ever. Not trying to scare you just telling you facts. It cannot be left too long you need to listen to what others are telling you and get on with credit checks etc. including the new baby's name.

RenterNomad Fri 03-May-13 13:30:31

Hope your DH manages to get some concentrated work time today to clear his head. If he can't ring banks, hopefully his parents can't ring him to badger him either...

Footface Fri 03-May-13 13:32:57

How awful for you both, it's a heart rending situation for dh in to in. I can't imagine how awful it must be to need to call the police for something his mum and dad have done.

By the way equifax do a free month trial which checks out your credit rating and any accounts it debts you may have.

You need to give them credit card details but as long as you cancel within the time it's free and instant.

Cerisier Fri 03-May-13 13:51:51

Another vote for not telling DH's parents anything. Also keep your financial paperwork away from them when they visit. Any bills with your address on can be used to open accounts in your name, if they register for internet banking you won't know what is going on as you won't receive any letters.

sicutlilium Fri 03-May-13 14:00:26

Yep, say "I have been advised that I must not discuss this matter". That should make them sweat.

Wibblypiglikesbananas Fri 03-May-13 15:57:43

Any update OP? I hope both you and your DH are ok.

I don't doubt that the pils are up to something here, but am struggling to see how it has worked in practice. Surely if they were in branch with someone she might have noticed that your fil looked a teensy bit older than the DOB he was quoting? Did she think he'd aged badly??

I don't think you need a code to open an equifax online account. I would definitely second all of the pps who have stressed that you should check your credit report. Tbh, everybody should really, but definitely when you have slippery as fish ils.

I have seen the devastation caused to my dh by his worthless mother, but even she never committed a criminal offence to stitch him up. Hope you can get it resolved quickly and easily.

ChestyNut Fri 03-May-13 17:10:05

How awful for you and DH sad
Can't imagine how poor DH feels being betrayed by his parents like that.

Hope Velcro baby has a better night thanks

I really feel for you - I've been the victim of fraud before and it's bad enough when it's some random but family? Words fail me.

StuntGirl Fri 03-May-13 18:21:16

Have you/your husband managed to speak to the bank today dannilion?

SugarPasteGreyhound Fri 03-May-13 18:59:32

Hope things are OK - this must be so awful for you

Blu Fri 03-May-13 19:13:41

Since the OP's DH has already told the bank to close the account and that he didn't open it, I doubt the risk of being seen as an accomplice or having HMRC breaking down the front door are minimal for now.

Probably best to deal with it when he can be calm and effective, and not by jeopardising his job.

Be preprared for MIL to arrive with another oven-ready crock of shit, trying to cover her tracks or emotionally blackmail DH out of taking action. Just take no notice, and say 'it's all in hand, I don't know how this happened, but the bank are now dealing with it. Lovely weather, isn't it?' and dpn't go into details.

helenthemadex Fri 03-May-13 21:15:31

hope you have managed to sort things out, its sounds a really horrible position to be in

brizzagirl Fri 03-May-13 22:59:42

How awful OP, that is bad enough at any time but unbelievably stressful with a newborn.
If you still only have a premium number for the fraud department you could try this website to see if there is a landline number for the same department which isn't a premium one.

Please keep us posted.

buildingmycorestrength Sat 04-May-13 09:12:26

OP, I've been thinking about you. I hope things have moved forward productively with the bank and credit check.

I keep thinking that the emotional fallout from the PILs is probably awful already. Hope you are okay and able to protect yourself and the baby.

Keep us posted, thinking of you!

ModernToss Sat 04-May-13 18:08:59

I've been worrying about you too. Horrible, horrible situation for you and your poor DH.

INeedThatForkOff Sat 04-May-13 18:46:20

Can I just ask, do posters really think of MN threads when they're going about their daily lives, or is it just a euphemism for being impatient for gossip news?

cozietoesie Sat 04-May-13 18:56:11

I do on occasion. I always assume that someone only comes here for advice if they have a real issue and I think hard, myself, about any advice I give - so I like to see whether the situation is such that more thought is needed.

But that's just me.

Xiaoxiong Sat 04-May-13 19:10:11

Ineed I did think about the OP today. I was telling DH about this thread over lunch and he asked whether the OP's DH was ok and had managed to close the account. I didn't know, so checked to see if the thread had been updated.

Fingers crossed no news is good news...

yes i do. sometimes the lives of others touches me deeply, even though it's just the net. still people on the other end.

SugarPasteGreyhound Sat 04-May-13 19:40:07

I did think about op today-in fact I was telling dh the story as he works for a bank (but not in retail banking). He thought as well that oil were in this up to their necks.

Bloody selfish behaviour. Threads like this actually make me angry, dh asked me why I had a face like thunder when I first read the op. Apparently I was grinding my teeth as well <attractive> grin

SugarPasteGreyhound Sat 04-May-13 19:40:56

Frigging auto correct is driving me mad! Oil=pil

Here's hoping that the reason there has been no update is because now there is a proper fraud +/- criminal investigation the op can't be seen to publicly discuss it as it might compromise the investigation and subsequent prosecution....

ChestyNut Sun 05-May-13 09:39:11

Hoping you've got it sorted OP?

Areyoumadorisitme Mon 06-May-13 00:02:13

Hope the weekend has gone ok Dannilon, have been wondering how you and DH'S are getting on?

cumfy Mon 06-May-13 01:42:15

Well, Santander will have kept copies of everything supplied.

Just wondering how long before the police get involved.

I'm guessing this Thursday.

cumfy Mon 06-May-13 01:55:55

Wonder if they're trying to make out that they were trying to open an account for PFB DGC ?

"Oh the girl got mixed up who was the baby who was the father, it was all going to be a big surprise <cry,cry>" hmmhmmhmm

PeeJayEll Mon 06-May-13 18:45:32

Oh, this is absolutely dreadful for you all. Hope it's all sorted as soon as possible

Pendipidy Tue 07-May-13 21:21:01

Op , come back!

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn Wed 08-May-13 08:17:21

Any news?

Camwombat Wed 08-May-13 15:04:41

OP, where are you??????

cumfy Sun 12-May-13 23:50:17

Anything happen ?

Just dropped in to say I agree with K8 about contacting the bank first. They have huge departments dedicated to fraud as they have a duty to protect customer's and also their own reputation. I think it unlikely staff are involved - there are very heavy personal fines and jail time as deterrents! Also, if they opened a savings account or a basic account they may not have needed to show ID? Don't know all the details, but if no borrowing can happen then maybe this is the case?

I hope DH has called the fraud team back. Credit checks may not show anything yet other than a search under his name as it can take up to 6 weeks for the info to be updated.

What a horrible situation. Thank god your PIL were too stupid to keep the information to themselves though - if they had, you might never have found out.

suburbophobe Mon 13-May-13 02:15:46

I haven't broached this with DH yet as it would be devastating for him.

We're on page 12 now so this may have been resolved already, but what do you mean?

He didn't get it? That their parents went behind his back and opened an account in his name?

Whatever, you and him need complete clarity with each other and find out how you can stop his parents using him for their - basically - criminal activities.....

glastocat Mon 13-May-13 02:41:22

I'm an ex bank auditor, and K8middletons advice is spot on.

ChairmanMeoww Mon 13-May-13 21:10:43

K8 is spot on. Speaking as a senior financial crime employee at another bank.

CrapBag Mon 13-May-13 21:32:21

Just read this!

Bloody shocking. Hope you come back and update OP. And I hope the PIL think this was worth their family relationships. They are dreadful dreadful people.

Hi OP, any update? Did things get sorted?

buildingmycorestrength Sun 19-May-13 22:00:16

Also keen to know what happened?

lechatnoir Thu 23-May-13 20:25:23

just wondering if there has been any update on this thread?

buildingmycorestrength Wed 29-May-13 14:47:41

Danillion (OP) is back posting elsewhere. Wonder if she'll come back here...

mummymccar Sat 01-Jun-13 21:28:32

Hoping that it has gone quiet because all is well OP. x

quietlysuggests Sat 01-Jun-13 21:54:54

senior financial crime employee

That's the fanciest job title I have ever heard!
And I met a nuclear submariner!

Nah,i once met a 'chief inspirer' now that's a title

Sorry for being flippant Dannilion, you're in a tough spot.

Hope all has worked out and you sorted it without causing too much trouble for the in laws. However they may have deserved it.

SybilRamkin Thu 01-Aug-13 16:13:07

Just wondering about this thread, what happened OP?

nauticant Thu 08-Aug-13 13:54:30

Sadly, Dannilion was killed and eaten by her PILs who took over her MN account so they could post in her name so no one would ever know.

doorbellringer Thu 08-Aug-13 16:00:09


doorbellringer Thu 08-Aug-13 16:02:12

Maybe MN opened the account under the wrong name but its all sorted now.
Sorry not being horrible to the OP just thought nauticant was amusing.

ImperialBlether Thu 08-Aug-13 16:29:29

Oh no! I've just read all of this with horror for the poor OP and her husband, only to find it's an older thread with no conclusion!

riskit4abiskit Thu 08-Aug-13 17:03:47

I wanted to know too!

newbiefrugalgal Sat 24-Aug-13 11:45:36

Thought an update was here too!

Misknit Sat 24-Aug-13 12:16:09

OP updated on another thread. It's with the ombudsman. It seems it was a clerical error on the bank's part.

buildingmycorestrength Sat 24-Aug-13 16:01:16

Ooh, thanks for updating, I'd wondered. Wonder what the ombudsman will find....

birdybear Sat 24-Aug-13 16:05:59

Wheres the other thread, do you know?i always wondered how this turned out!

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