To think if you practice you should get a chance

(69 Posts)
lisad123everybodydancenow Tue 30-Apr-13 23:29:07

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Sirzy Tue 30-Apr-13 23:33:49

How old is she?

At primary level I would go with the "let everyone have a chance" way of thinking biking at secondary school I would expect them to pick the best avaibale team

lisad123everybodydancenow Tue 30-Apr-13 23:38:44

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BackforGood Tue 30-Apr-13 23:50:28

I totally agree with you. It's only by playing and learning from that, that they will improve. It's shocking that someone involved in education thinks it's OK to give the message to 9, 10, and 11 yr olds that they are 'not good enough'.
I have to say, at my dcs school, everyone who turns up reliably to practices gets to represent the school in matches. It's a very, very, very successful school (in terms of winning sporting competitions) by following this policy, rather than only playing "the elite".
IMO because they encourage eveyone to play and build their experience and therefore skill, they have a huge amount of strength in depth in many, many sports they play against other schools.

CloudsAndTrees Wed 01-May-13 00:01:10

YANBU.

Even if it meant playing in the B team against another B team, schools should make that happen if they are going to do it at all.

It's as if they forget that they are there to benefit children sometimes the way sports clubs are run. hmm

Cherriesarelovely Wed 01-May-13 00:07:05

Agree with you OP. How soul destroying for your Dd. Recently a child at our school was rewarded with a trophy for having attended every single football practice for FOUR YEARS despite never being given the opportunity to play a match. I felt like crying when that was read our in assembly. This was a little village football team, not the national bloody squad. So horrible!

BlackeyedSusan Wed 01-May-13 00:14:25

yanbu.

ThisIsMummyPig Wed 01-May-13 00:14:43

Well, I was never picked for the team, and I wouldn't have been good enough, but I did get to go a couple of times, and I was brought on as a substitute. I knew I wasn't as good as the others, and not being picked didn't bother me.

Not all schools are big enough for a B team. At my DDs school there are only about 16 girls in total in Y5 and Y6, and obviously not all of them would want to be on a sports team.

MidniteScribbler Wed 01-May-13 00:20:26

YANBU, regardless of age, it's incredibly rude to expect someone to constantly train, but never get a chance to perform in any capacity. Schools should be taking the whole team, and then switching players in and out during a match to give everyone a chance. I'm not necessarily one of those "everyone should get everything they want" type people, but if you're going to only have a select team, then you need to pick that team at the start of the year after tryouts. Don't lead kids on letting them think they have a chance if they don't.

OkayHazel Wed 01-May-13 00:20:50

I think sport provides the particularly sporty kids an area to excel in. Life isn't about taking part generally.

Just being okay with not being good enough is sometimes a good lesson to learn. How would you feel if your DD had a real talent, but wasn't allowed to play competitively because the rota had to be fair to everyone? The talented girls would lower their levels of play to accommodate the less able ones.

That's certainly less fair.

I realize this opinion will be unpopular.

BegoniaBampot Wed 01-May-13 00:30:05

I agree with you. Crap way to encourage all kids to play sport and excerise if they keep getting pushed aside. No reason they can't have several teams to accomodate more kids of all levels. Played netball and other sports as an adult and they have lots of diffent divisions, teams etc to make it more accessible for all.

Kids sport is getting more and more competitive in this country from an earlier age. If you don't start young it is difficult to catch up at an older age.

jaywall Wed 01-May-13 02:50:44

Kids sport is getting more and more competitive in this country from an earlier age<<<<<<< what !!!

I disagree, it is becoming less competitive and hugely so. There used to be leagues in football, rounders, netball, hockey, cricket etc in our area and the best players were picked. When you got picked you and everyone else knew it was on merit and this built a real team spirit. But no more it seems, not according to DS school. I think that is a sad change.

Not everyone can be the best at a certain thing at a certain time, but if they get picked anyway what will that teach them? Entitlement.

Everyone is different and will excel in different areas, accept this and teach it your kids. When they find something they like and they are good at, it will be all the sweeter knowing the failures they endured already.

Learn a little life and let your kids learn too.

deleted203 Wed 01-May-13 03:05:40

If it's primary I think they should all get a chance to play in the team. It's just fun at this age - hardly serious competition. And it is soul destroying to keep going to practise and never getting picked. If there are enough kids then they could run a B team.

Once at secondary level they should pick the best ones. Agree with those saying that it gives sporty ones a chance to shine - and often these are kids who are not necessarily academic. No one is going to give you the Maths prize if you're crap at it, so why should you give up your team place to someone who isn't much good, just so that they can all have a turn?

By secondary age most pupils start to realise that you can't be great at everything - and would be highly annoyed it their fab Art project was given low marks whilst someone else's piss poor effort came first. Similarly kids who are very sporty don't take well to being dropped from the team for someone who is keen but unco-ordinated.

You can't play in the school orchestra on your squeaky recorder whilst they drop the kid with Grade 5 violin - so by this age they should not be dropping the best netball players to let the weaker ones 'have a go'.

Gentleness Wed 01-May-13 03:22:51

25 girls in our year at primary. I was always put in the C team! And yes, it has scarred me, silly though that sounds. I would rather have my toenails pulled off than engage in any competitive sport now, and define myself as being no good at any kind of physical activity. And yes, I'm overweight, unfit and unhealthy. There must be a way of involving all without creating such depressing attitudes.

I'd love to know more about your school Backforgood.

Gentleness Wed 01-May-13 03:25:08

Should say, it's not that I expected recognition for abilities I didn't have, just that it was always sooooo clear that being on the third team made you a joke.

ItsallisnowaFeegle Wed 01-May-13 03:46:29

YANBU They should all get their chance, but although I see the logic of an A & B team, it doesn't sit comfortably with me for some reason.

I remember being in primary school and being desperate to get a chance to play on the netball team, even just once and I was never picked. I actually remember one specific instance in which I was particularly upset.

I, by nature, am a drama queen and that could explain why after 20 something years it's still something I remember having as having a negative impact on me but my opinion stands. Give everyone the chance to feel pride in themselves for being part of the school team.

Thumbwitch Wed 01-May-13 05:03:10

I'm a bit torn about this but since it's primary level, I think I'm leaning more towards "everyone should get a go".

However, I'm more concerned that it's ALWAYS the same girls who are chosen - do they only have 7 players who can play well? How many are in the "squad"? (I use the term loosely as they only have one team, it seems).

Our senior school was highly competitive at sports, particularly netball, but even so they didn't field exactly the same team every time!

kickassangel Wed 01-May-13 05:18:06

But there's loads of evidence that those who Get picked for teams and extra experience improve far more than those who don't, so they are making it harder for the non team players to compete. It's in the school's best interests to have a range of players to choose from, not just a few.

Mind you, when I was at school the best players got to choose their own team, so no favoritism there, then.

I'm with Okayhazel, but also find it bizarre that people think that if you don't get picked its bad or you'll give up.

I run, wasn't great at it at school but enjoyed the physical activity and knew it was good for me.

Instil into your kids the positive health and social benefits of sport and concentrate on that rather than the all inclusive bollocks which I find a bit demeaning. I'd rather not be picked than be on the pity team. Doesn't mean has to give up totally.

frazmum Wed 01-May-13 06:23:25

At our cricket club selection rules for primary & younger secondary kids are that all must be given a regular chance to play. The way this works in reality is that there is a core group of good players always picked and others are rotated so all get games over the season. I'd be challenging the school. YANBU.

gorionine Wed 01-May-13 06:27:49

What Backforgood said.

EmmaBemma Wed 01-May-13 06:29:02

I agree with you too. Where's the incentive to keep practising if you never get a game?

mrssprout Wed 01-May-13 06:35:51

My DD tried out for the t-ball & soccer teams last year at school & got in to represent the school in both. This year she tried out & didn't get in to either. There were lots of girls trying out both years so I think they just chose different girls this year to give everyone a go (these are teams that represent the school & she is yr 5 this year). At this age I really think they should be giving them all a go, I can understand as they get into secondary school basing the teams more on ability but when they are younger just let them all have a try.

BalloonSlayer Wed 01-May-13 06:45:14

This has happened to my DD. I think she is getting disheartened and I don't know what to say to her sad

I haven't seen my DD play but clearly she's not much good. I so wish they would have one place in the team that they kept for people like her so that all the not-so-goods got a chance to play in a match once or twice a year.

I felt so sad the other day when I had to pop into the school office for something and there was the netball team - all basically DD's good friends - all excited off to a match . . . then driving home, I passed DD walking home all on her own*.

* she doesn't want a lift BTW.

HollyMadison Wed 01-May-13 06:53:18

I think they could do with a B team. Even if they don't have enough players to play as a B team in the league they could have a few games. Or could you organize some "friendies" against other schools outside the league competition and then the playing team could consist of a wider group of players?

I'm not sure I agree that it is a valuable lesson to miss out on playing even though you've turned up to training for many months/years. I don't think that really happens in adult life, unless you're in the upper echelons of your sport. Which applies to very few people. I think the lessons you learn by actually playing the team game - teamwork, fairplay, respect for the referee, always try your best etc - outweigh these.

And in adult life you are often working in groups of people with a wide range of abilities and it makes sense to develop everybody, not just the people who might be the strongest today.

A couple of years ago the All Blacks' fourth choice fly half was called into the playing team from a fishing holiday, ran on in the World Cup final wearing someone else's jumper that didn't fit, and kicked what turned out to be the winning points to win the World Cup. I hope that happens to your DD, in the primary school netball context....

Thumbwitch Wed 01-May-13 06:54:05

I meant to say something about that too kickass - if you're in a team with better players, chances are your game will pick up too, thus giving you more of a chance to improve.

DH plays tennis - his game varies according to the level of his opponents, always improving when he's playing better players.

lisad123everybodydancenow Wed 01-May-13 07:01:52

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OutInAllWeathers Wed 01-May-13 07:05:17

YANBU op I help out with sport and we always acknowledge those who put the effort in and turn up to training by playing them in some matches. At this age they need proper game experience to get the feel of the game and improve techniques.
That said many schools we play against do just choose their best so it's not particularly unusual.

WeAreEternal Wed 01-May-13 07:06:16

I was entirely ready to say YABU, just because you practice doesn't mean you get to play.
I hate how everything is so PC now, trophies for participating, medals for everyone in the race, it is silly. children need to be taught that to succeed (and win) you have to work hard to be the best, if everyone is rewarded all the time then there is no motivation to work hard.
If everyone who trains gets to be on the team then the team won't be it's best. Realistically they should pick the best players for the team and send the rest away, but it is good that they are letting other have the chance to practice and improve for a chance to join the team.

HOWEVER, when I saw that your DD, and the rest of the children, are only years 5 and 6 I do think that applies as strongly, they are only young, and why I still think its important to teach them that it's hard work that makes you succeed, I think it's also important to let DC's all have a chance at that age.

IUWY OP I would pull DD from that team and find another local netball team for her to join.

RatherBeOnThePiste Wed 01-May-13 07:09:34

You have to think too about the competition - if a mixed ability team go to a match against a selected ability team and get slaughtered 35 nil, that is awful for confidence.

In our area it is competitive, and there are leagues, and at primary boys and girls both play in the same netball team, and in borough competitions you have to field a mixed team, the same for the football and tag rugby

I certainly don't think the school are organising this well, really doesn't seem fair though, there surely is a better way.

2fedup Wed 01-May-13 07:16:00

I'm with the unpopular view and think YABU to some extent. I think the school could encourage the other children to be more involved in games outside school matches. My DC as house teams for this reason, so everyone gets to play competitive games within the school environment with other non players cheering them on, but only the better players get to play external matches.
Not everyone can be good at everything and learning to support others is an important skill.

WorrySighWorrySigh Wed 01-May-13 07:21:19

Not everyone can be the best at a certain thing at a certain time, but if they get picked anyway what will that teach them? Entitlement.

Everyone is different and will excel in different areas, accept this and teach it your kids. When they find something they like and they are good at, it will be all the sweeter knowing the failures they endured already.

IME this attitude tends to be held by people who have already found the thing they excel at and so tend to be quite smug about it.

At school many children havent found the thing that they excel at (an awful lot never will). Teaching children from an early age that no matter how hard they try they wont be good enough seems to be a very harsh lesson and not a good one as it encourages children to give up if they dont get a quick result.

lougle Wed 01-May-13 07:37:31

I remember being so desperate tojoin netball that I volunteered to be the ball girl. I got changes every practice, just to get the balls as the went off court. Then someone was off sick and I was put in goal shoot. I was actually good. The teacher had just judged me on my footwork.

I hate sports and think I'm no good, despite being tall and slim.

Lonecatwithkitten Wed 01-May-13 07:48:26

DD's school have some competitive matches and some inclusive matches. They are not listed as the A and B team, but this week as the red and yellow.

YANBU, if you are playing at a high level then of course you field team you can, but certainly for friendly matches everyone should get a chance. Recently we have noticed that this is happening in club rugby as well, there are plenty of players who play for several teams (higher level) and yet these boys are still first choice to play the regular fixtures, whereas boys who only ever play in these matches only get half a match at best. As the league is non-competetive, ie. just friendly matches I feel very strongly that the "weaker" boys who turn up to training should be given the most time on the pitch while the "prima donnas" who feel that they have no need to practice as they are SO good should be the substitutes. (and yes, my own DS plays every match, so it's not sour grapes). Children will NOT improve at sport unless they get a chance to play matches, fact! Training is a completely different thing to having a match.

CloudsAndTrees Wed 01-May-13 07:54:54

Just being okay with not being good enough is sometimes a good lesson to learn. How would you feel if your DD had a real talent, but wasn't allowed to play competitively because the rota had to be fair to everyone?

The thing is, this is school sports we are talking about here. You would have a fair point if it were an out of school club that exists just for the sake of playing that sport, but this is in school, where every child should have access to what is on offer.

All children need to learn to be part of a team, all children can benefit from the experience of going to others schools and competing, and most importantly, all children need to be able to take part in a form of exercise they enjoy.

If school sports teams exclude children on ability, then it's no wonder that we have the highest rate of child obesity ever. You wouldn't tell a dyslexic child that they aren't allowed to enter the school spelling competition. This is no different.

BegoniaBampot Wed 01-May-13 07:56:16

Yes, many sports do get competitive from a young age. My kids play football. one started out in a new B team for an established team at age 7. By the bend of the season the weaker players who had been there from the start through hail and snow and when they were desperate for players were dropped as better players were brought into the team. At age 6 my youngest's team was quite established and competitve that new kids coming along to play for the first time and get involved didn't have a look in. Don't get me started on tennis with kids age 7 playing 3 and 5 times a week with private tution.

I just don't remember sport being that organised and competitive when I was young in the 70's and 80's.

flossymuldoon Wed 01-May-13 08:03:46

I think its crap.
I was a good sprinter but not recognised as being one of the sporty ones so never got picked. The PE teachers only ever picked their favourites and the ones that participated in all the sports.

We had a race between the 4 houses and i wanted to run for my house. I seriousley thought that when i raised my hand i'd get picked as i was miles faster than anyone else but i was ignored and they decided for us all to run and the person that won would be chosen. I won by a huge mile so i did get chosen in the end but the point i'm making is that although i was fast i wasn't in the core bunch of favourites so no-one ever noticed if i was good or not. I used to get a C on my report every term no matter how hard i worked and it's because the teachers never took any notice of me.

When i got to high school i had the same fave girls in my PE class. We did timed runs against each other and i came joint 2nd (and equal to the 2nd fastest fave girl who used to run for my city). I thought that would mean i would get some recognition but sadly not. I think that with a bit of encouragement i could have been pretty good but it just put me off competitive sports for life. How is anyone ever going to get better if they are not encouraged?

I am sad to see that in the 20+ years since i left school nothing has changed.

LIZS Wed 01-May-13 08:15:04

yanbu but ime it simply doesn't work like that even in an ostensibly "inclusive" school. Teams are preselected and others get the odd token match. The gap between those who matter and those who don't gets wider as more attention is given to them and they gain more match experience. dd got so peed off with hers that when it came to deciding between "team" practice and Brownies she opted for the latter much to the annoyance of the games teacher !

anothermadamebutterfly Wed 01-May-13 10:06:55

YANBU - this is primary school, the kids are very young, and the ones who show enough interest and dedication to turn up for regular training should be given a chance to be on a team, either through a rota system or having A and B teams.

I don't buy all that 'kids who are good at sports but not at academic subjects have to be given a chance to shine' stuff - my DD (year 5) is one of those kids. She competes regularly in her extra-curricular club sports, enjoys it, and knows she is good (and she happily accepts that she finds english and maths more difficult).

Her school is very inclusive, and always rotates the teams, giving all the children who attend the practice sessions a chance to take part.

macreturnofthe Wed 01-May-13 10:36:25

why is it that with sport we have to be all about the taking part, but we happily set kids in other subjects like maths. I still remember being the only kid in the school not allowed in the choir (junior school) but the thing I was great at sport - the team had to rotate so all the kids got a go - fair?!?!

However, now I am a grown up (boo!) i get it - I think school sport should be about encouraging children to live a healthy life and stay involved in sport as they grow up, so the school does need to come up with a way of allowing all the kids to play in matches, while not upsetting the competitive ones - friendly matches could be an option

meditrina Wed 01-May-13 10:54:58

If they have enough players, then I think they should have a B team (and C and D, or however many). If they're arranging fixtures, then surely some of the other schools they play could also field more than one team?

That way, you can have both an A team of the best players, and other less selected teams so everyone can join in.

Wishiwasanheiress Wed 01-May-13 10:57:25

Def YANBU

quoteunquote Wed 01-May-13 11:07:33

Just ask for a B team to be formed,

You cannot ask for someone to give up their deserved place on a team.

The only problem with A and B teams is that the gulf gradually gets wider. My DS plays football for the local under 9s, he is doubly disadvantaged as he only joined last year and he has Asperger's syndrome. The coach is brilliant and has set up a B team for the boys who aren't strong enough for the A team (which is very strong, they are top of the area under 9 league), The B team play friendlies but not every week and some of the players play for either team. However it is apparent in training that the A team regulars are getting better and better while the B teamers are improving much more slowly. It is fine for now, my DS is happy with it, he loves it when he gets a game but would get slaughtered in the A team, however I don't think it's is sustainable long term.

DontmindifIdo Wed 01-May-13 11:10:12

Well there's 2 things here, firstly, I don't think it's a case that your DD goes to all the practice sessions so should get a place, more that the other children who don't go to practice should learn they lose their place for that week for not turning up to training.

However, it's also a useful lesson that there are somethings you aren't as good at as others, no matter how hard you try. On the face of it, that's not fair, but that's how things outside of schools work. It's not always "if you do X and Y you'll get Z" sometimes, you can do X and Y and not get Z, or someone can miss either X or Y and still get Z.

ryanboy Wed 01-May-13 11:18:30

forming a B team is the way forward

nancy75 Wed 01-May-13 11:24:41

If the school wants to always put out the best team they should pick a squad (team +3) and run the practise sessions just for the squad or make it quite clear that others can come to practise but will not be picked because they are not in the squad.

I don't think it's fair to get little kids turning up week in week out, thinking they might be picked when its not going to happen.

I work for a company that teaches a sport to children and I can assure you that there is massive competition within kids sport form an early age, however there are ways to manage it so that everyone gets a go. We run elite teams for those that are very talented and play 3,4 or 5 times a week, but we also run teams for those that are not quite up to that standard.

Fillyjonk75 Wed 01-May-13 11:27:33

I agree, OP. I was picked for the team I think precisely because I was committed, I was never that good at team sports. Also see drama club. I got picked for parts because I would always be there, learn my lines quickly and everyone elses!

Andro Wed 01-May-13 11:38:48

Best players in the A team (and have B team if there are enough numbers). Competitive sport is ultimately about winning, it's soul destroying when someone is 'given a chance' despite being an obvious weak link...it also causes resentment (on the part of more skilled players who have been left out and the rest of the team if they then lose).

ReallyTired Wed 01-May-13 13:37:53

I think that primary school level that all children who attend the practice should get the chance to compete. I like the idea of having competitive and non competitive weeks. Talented children need to compete against talented chidlren to improve and the no hopers don't want to be beaten 35 nil.

Otherwise you end up in a situaiton where the netball team is mostly september born girls and the august born children have no chance.

School sport should be about fitness for life particularly at primary school.

SneezySnatcher Wed 01-May-13 13:43:49

YANBU - I used to coach my primary school's football team before I went on maternity leave. I made sure everyone got a chance to play in a match even the ones who weren't very good.

Sadly, the parents would often complain about me putting on the less confident players and risk losing matches (although we were great). I'm sure if it had been their children who were never picked they wouldn't have been happy.

thezebrawearspurple Wed 01-May-13 16:08:30

yabu, the whole point of competition is to win, it's not fair on those who practice hard enough to be the best to be stuck on a losing team just to make the less talented/dedicated feel better about themselves.

If your daughter wants to compete, she needs to practice harder and more often.

CruCru Wed 01-May-13 16:27:35

This reminds me of my junior school. Are there any other teams she could join (outside school) or other activities she is interested in?

I wonder if, should she drop the practice, they would give her a hard time because they want to keep numbers at practice up (particularly if those who play in matches don't always show up). Is it worth having a word with the coach to see if there's any chance she'll play in a match ever or if she should look into another team or activity? It sounds PFB but she is missing out on the main event by never going to matches.

WorrySighWorrySigh Wed 01-May-13 20:19:22

If this were an out of school club then I would say YABU but this is a school club, run by the school for the school. School sports teams shouldnt be but were in my day run for the aggrandisement of the team or the school.

If parents want all out competition for their children then go to local sports clubs where there will be competition aplenty. School sports should be about teaching teamwork, sportsmanship, participation etc etc.

YANBU

BegoniaBampot Wed 01-May-13 20:20:04

a good point about the september/august kids. there have been studies done (don't know how thorough) which seem to suggest that the footballers who made it were the older boys in the year. they have the edge over the much younger ones, get picked and it becomes a viscious circle about catch up but where the divide gets bigger. sometimes the same with kids who didn't start early enough and again often never got the chance to catch up.

ReallyTired Wed 01-May-13 22:34:15

"yabu, the whole point of competition is to win, it's not fair on those who practice hard enough to be the best to be stuck on a losing team just to make the less talented/dedicated feel better about themselves"

Some people would say that winning is not the most important thing in life. Primary school sport is hardly the olympics and children of all levels of ablity need to be catered for.

Not all children are going to be top mathematicans, but children are all given sums at a level that they can cope with. It is called differentiation. Our local gymnastics club has groups for children with special needs and also produced an olympic bronze medalist. Good sports clubs often give children of all ablities opportunites and I feel schools have a duty to do the same.

Children who are weak at sport need a lot of encouragement to continue with sport. I feel that a mixture of friendly/ non competitive matches for the weaker children and competitive matches for the high ablity children.

BegoniaBampot Wed 01-May-13 22:48:05

exactly Reallytired. good points.

Thumbwitch Wed 01-May-13 23:03:09

Agree with Reallytired.

Whatever happened to the "It's not about winning, it's about taking part" maxim?

Budgiegirlbob Thu 02-May-13 14:15:59

I agree with Reallytired, the school should try to arrange a combination of competitive matches and friendly matches.

My OH runs a school football club, and for competitive matches he will usually pick the strongest players, and I do think that that is the best thing to do. But he also arranges friendlies where the weaker players can get involved.

He also tries to stress that football club is all about having fun at training, they play football skill related games, and also have mini matches against each other. Being picked for the team is just a bonus.

Sometimes though, it's not always the best thing for a weaker player to get picked, if the opposition is strong. There is nothing worse for a child's ego to be the reason that his/her team lost a match ( I speak from personal experience !!), that can be far more humiliating that not being picked in the first place.

There must be ways and means of managing this. DC's school have a policy that every child that wants to compete will get to do so, at an appropriate level. There is no disguising the level (teams are A/B/C/etc) but a really keen child might be taken as a sub and given part of a game against weaker competition to give them a flavour of a "higher" team, IYSWIM. By year 5-6 there are some DC who clearly do not want to play competitive team sports, and there are other non-competitive but still active sports for them, but when needs must - the head said yesterday that due to the numbers off games for one reason or another, every single child in the top 2 years who was fit was playing in a match.

OP - is there a non-confrontational way that you could ask the school about this - what their policy is? It seems pointless to ask all DC to join if they want to, and then never arrange matches for any but the elite.

Butkin Thu 02-May-13 14:43:00

DD's school has been playing competitive sport against other schools since Yr 3. They play - at various times of the year - hockey, netball, rounders and tennis.

DD has been lucky enough to play in all the teams since the start. Now in Yr 5 she has struggled to get in U11s A team because they were all Yr6 girls so she was content to play in the B team. By going to every "Club" after school she's finally broken into the A team - the only Yr 5 girl - and is loving playing in the tournaments etc. She is looking forward to leading her team mates when they move into Yr 6 next year.

A lot of other parents moan that their children don't get picked for the B or C team but as DD points out to me they don't go to all the clubs and don't concentrate fully throughout the lesson/matches. At lot of it is about showing the teachers that they are dedicated as well as skilful.

She also plays for her town hockey team and this also helps because they get harder tuition than she receives at school. It is noticeable that all the A team schoolgirls do the same.

School do have house matches which gives them all a chance to be competitive - no child misses out on these matches unless they select "non-Sport" on those days.

Butkin Thu 02-May-13 14:57:38

OP you say that the girls are Yr 5 and 6. Does this mean that they are playing U11 matches against other schools? It is hard for Yr 5s to break into the A team but don't forget they will be the eldest girls next year and should find it much easier as they will be the biggest and, hopefully, most competant.

BackforGood Thu 02-May-13 14:57:43

At Primary school level - possibly older, but we are talking about Primary here - teams can substitute players in and out throughout the match. My dd plays a lot of football for her school, and knows that, for each 7 a side game (which is what they play most) there is a squad of 10, and that everyone will play, and everyone (usually except the goalie as she's the only one who wants that job) will, at some point in the game, be on the sidelines. Her school side have won, or come runners up in lots of things this season, and occasionally they have come 3rd or 4th. They play in all sorts of different tournaments - from indoor 4 a side, to outdoor 9 a side. Yes, there are 2 or 3 girls who play %wise more time than some of the others, but everyone who comes to the practices gets to play. Generally the teacher knows which other schools will be stronger / weaker competition and picks his squad accordingly. He then arranges competitions for just the Yr4 / 5s, so they all start getting experience before the league and cup matches in Yr6.
It is of course a massive time commitment for him, and I wouldn't expect many teachers to give even 1/4 of the time he commits to after school sport, but the principle is still the same.
Gentleness - what do you want to know ? It's a state school, 3 form entry. That I know of, they play other schools at : football (girls, and boys), tag rugby (has to be mixed) netball (girls) basketball (mixed), golf, athletics, cricket, table tennis, and there are also dance and gym clubs which are for participation rather than competing against others. Some are run by the PE chap (who has a full time class commitment), others are run by other staff, some by outside coaches. Sometimes he has more than one fixture on a night then another teacher will go along with a parent or two and the fixture goes ahead without him if he is at a competition elsewhere. Not sure when he sees his wife and family though!

BackforGood Thu 02-May-13 14:59:00

Oh - forgot hockey... they just started that too!

happyyonisleepyyoni Thu 02-May-13 15:11:00

I agree with you OP, had the same issue with my DS and football.
If kids show the commitment to practice then they should get a chance to play somehow or other in matches, no matter their ability level, whether thats by having a B team or substituting in.

ShadowStorm Thu 02-May-13 22:20:32

YANBU, especially as it's primary school kids.

Even if they do want to pick the best players, you'd think that if they don't have enough for a B team, they could have a core number of good players on the team, and then let the other kids rotate in, so that all the kids get to play at least some games over the year.

Also, it'd make sense for them to try and develop all the kids. If they're putting all the effort into developing the handful of kids who are picked for every match, what are they going to do if one of them gets flu or something and has to miss a few matches?

ll31 Fri 03-May-13 08:02:32

and Yanbu,primary should be about developing all pupils skills and encouraging a love of exercise and activity.

MummytoKatie Fri 03-May-13 18:17:04

Right or wrong - it's actually really short sighted.

Netball ability is at least partially about height. I was very sporty and had decent throwing and catching skills but I was also an August birthday so one of the shortest. In primary (which went from Year 4 to Year 7 due to the county I was in) they had netball club for Year 5 to Year 7. I went for ll of Year 5 then half of Year 6 and never got picked. Then my gym club set up a new training session that clashed so I picked that instead.

And then I grew! By the time I got back from the summer in Year 7 I was confusingly tall. And so mix that with the decent ball skills I was really good at netball in lessons. But I now had other commitments on netball team practice so I didn't go. (Plus I'd been put off so wasn't a fan of the whole thing.)

Got to secondary. Played in the A team for the whole time. Only one from my primary.

Was talking to my mum about it recently. Apparently the (ridiculously competitive) PE teacher in primary actually phoned her to try and get her to tell me I had to play.

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