To think my MIL really is a bit odd?

(97 Posts)
gail734 Tue 30-Apr-13 15:20:26

I was in PIL's house, talking to MIL. During our conversation, she kept getting up to peer out of the window. Then I heard a car pull up and she ran to the window. She turned to me, clapped her hands and cried, "That's my baby!" And then she did a little skip!
I was totally confused. I looked out of the window, (obviously) to see 65 year old FIL walking up the path. By this time MIL was running for the front door. FIL was not returning from the war, he was coming home from work. He's semi-retired. It was 2pm and he'd been at work since 9am. FIL certainly does not behave like this. So go on, tell me IABU, that this is romantic and you'd do the same after 40 years of marriage. I think she's crackers.

PanpiperAtTheGatesOfYawn Tue 30-Apr-13 15:23:34

I think that's kind of cute if a bit OTT. Sorry, it's a YABU from me.

Was she high?

seeker Tue 30-Apr-13 15:24:55

Yet a another example of a MIL being unable to win!

WouldBeHarrietVane Tue 30-Apr-13 15:25:46

YABU - it's cute smile

PoppyAmex Tue 30-Apr-13 15:26:19

I'm laughing at the excess enthusiasm, but I think it's actually really sweet. YABU

gail734 Tue 30-Apr-13 15:28:06

Oh, go on, the lot of you! She's bonkers! Calling him "my baby" especially!

musickeepsmesane Tue 30-Apr-13 15:29:24

I always check MIL threads in case I have freaked my DDIL out. grin Might give this a go. YABU. I fully intend to skip everywhere from now on though DH may leave me

musickeepsmesane Tue 30-Apr-13 15:30:09

yeah, she is a tiny little bit bonkers, in a good way wink

zoobaby Tue 30-Apr-13 15:30:21

Maybe she was pleased that he'd come home to rescue her from you? grin (joke)

MaxPepsi Tue 30-Apr-13 15:30:39

No, she just loves her husband.

Or she knew he had a new diamond ring in his pocket/was bringing her favourite lunch and was starving/got her a new puppy.

gail734 Tue 30-Apr-13 15:32:02

No, musickeepsmesane, surely your DH would love it if you threw the door open and jumped into his arms as if you hadn't seen him for a year?

SoniaGluck Tue 30-Apr-13 15:32:37

I think YABU. It's nice to think some people still feel like that after x years of marriage.

It's a hell of a lot better than PIL sniping at each other.

WilsonFrickett Tue 30-Apr-13 15:32:43

Oh that is cute! I'm not sure I have ever been able to muster up a skip for DH unless he had chips and wine

cornyderpy Tue 30-Apr-13 15:33:35

aw I think that's really nice

If my MIL did that I would assume she'd got some form of early dementia. I cannot tell you how far outside her normal character that behaviour would be!

PanpiperAtTheGatesOfYawn Tue 30-Apr-13 15:34:53

gail, have you considered how much SEX they must be having to still have this kind of relationship?


ScrambledSmegs Tue 30-Apr-13 15:34:53

Yes, a little odd. But in a really sweet way smile

Come on, isn't it actually rather lovely that she clearly still adores him after 40 years of marriage? I would love to know what their secret is.

ShatnersBassoon Tue 30-Apr-13 15:35:17

It is a bit odd, but in a totally harmless and quite cute way.

I wish DH dashed for the door when I arrived home, instead of dashing and trying to do the job he was supposed to have done in my absence in the time it takes me to get from the car to the door.

NotSoNervous Tue 30-Apr-13 15:36:01

Okay I think YABU but I do think its abit OTT

gail734 Tue 30-Apr-13 15:36:44

zoobaby Even before he turned up, I was getting a bit annoyed by the window-watching. I was thinking, whoever she's expecting must be pretty damned interesting! Then that old duffer arrived!

MaxPepsi I get that she loves her husband, but I've never seen anybody love their husband that much, ever, in real life! I've been to plenty of weddings at which the couple weren't that demonstrative.

Tee2072 Tue 30-Apr-13 15:37:00

grin Panpiper

I think it's sweet too.

SoniaGluck Tue 30-Apr-13 15:38:32

Oh, and what seeker said.

God help me when I become a MIL. I'm going to be afraid to open my mouth, or not open my mouth. Or offer to help, or not offer to help. Or ask what the grandchildren would like for Christmas/birthday presents, or not...etc.,etc. hmm

gail734 Tue 30-Apr-13 15:42:26

OK, Panpiper thanks for that image. Mrsminivers I can only compare this to my own mother, who before her death had been married to my DF for 30 years. They always danced together at weddings and that was the only time I ever saw them being romantic. All joking aside, when MIL clapped and skipped, I thought "That's it, she's finally lost it." My second thought was, "Have you been at the sherry?"

diddl Tue 30-Apr-13 15:43:07

Well it's kind of cute-but imo massively rude to keep getting up & looking out of the window when you have a visitor.

I guess you're not that interesting, OPgrin

PanpiperAtTheGatesOfYawn Tue 30-Apr-13 15:43:28

My pleasure Gail. grin

My work here is done! <twirls off>

mrsjay Tue 30-Apr-13 15:43:48

I think that's kind of cute if a bit OTT. Sorry, it's a YABU from me.

Was she high?

<arf> that made me laugh

op I think it is nice she still loves him after how ever many years together maybe a bit ott but stil nice, what did she really do that was so wrong, did her love for her husband embarrass you ?

Branleuse Tue 30-Apr-13 15:44:17

cute !

mrsjay Tue 30-Apr-13 15:45:12

*gail, have you considered how much SEX they must be having to still have this kind of relationship?


grin yep the father in law is a tiger in bed OP have a think about that

usualsuspect Tue 30-Apr-13 15:47:00


It's not my way but jeez some people find the stupidest things to slag their mils off for.

YouDontWinFriendsWithSalad Tue 30-Apr-13 15:47:14

Aww, that's sweet! I hope I'm still that excited to see DH in 30 years' time.

musickeepsmesane Tue 30-Apr-13 15:47:32

gail !! grin omg, would DH expect more sex if I was all skippy and pleased to see him................forget that grin

gail734 Tue 30-Apr-13 15:50:22

Bleugh, I wish you'd all stop talking about my PILs having the sex!

JerseySpud Tue 30-Apr-13 15:51:01

YABVU. I think its cute. You are grumpy.

musickeepsmesane Tue 30-Apr-13 15:53:28

maybe a wee sherry loosens her up for some afternoon delight. I hope you had the good grace to go home and let the lovebirds have some fun!

gail734 Tue 30-Apr-13 15:57:16

I'm not saying it isn't cute, I'm saying it's weird. Nobody behaves like this. I was thinking that you might all be commenting saying, "My grandma still calls my grandpa Cupcake", but nobody else has given me any equivalent. Also, my FIL frequently looks a bit fed up with it, quite frankly.

Crinkle77 Tue 30-Apr-13 15:57:49

I think it's actually rather sweet that she is still in love after all these times. Ok I can see your point that she is acting a bit like a love struck teenager but I think it's lovely

gail734 Tue 30-Apr-13 15:59:13

OMG, music. "afternoon delight"? Now you have taken it too far!

aldiwhore Tue 30-Apr-13 15:59:47

Oh it's utterly bonkers, but I like utterly bonkers.

I think it's something to be celebrated. YANBU because you're right, YWBU if you pulled a catsbum face when it happens. Roll your eyes and laugh inside.

My 94 year old Granny was posher than the Queen, a terrible snob, and very undemonstrative as far as PDAs were concerned, she thought it vulgar.

Then she met my DH, and suddenly, this rickety old dear with no pulse in her legs started jigging and clapping hands in joy whenever she saw him... she'd look crest fallen if I visited without him. To my knowledge, they never had sex (urgh I didn't want THAT thought) but he brought her joy, and I'm glad of it.

That your MIL gets that joy from her own husband is a lovely thing.

mrsjay Tue 30-Apr-13 16:00:48

maybe a wee sherry loosens her up for some afternoon delight. I hope you had the good grace to go home and let the lovebirds have some fun!

gail i think your mil is probably bonkers but she is happy can't remember the last time I skipped to see my dh if ever maybe once the kids move out IYSWIM wink

WTFisABooyhooISBooyhoo Tue 30-Apr-13 16:12:23

maybe today is their 'date' day and she'd been anticipating his <ahem> arrival all day wink

SanitaryOwl Tue 30-Apr-13 16:15:22

It's bonkers, but it's also really lovely. Stop being a grump!

chickydoo Tue 30-Apr-13 16:18:41

I think it's lovely

iliketea Tue 30-Apr-13 16:19:36

Maybe it was a dare? Maybe your MIL is an MNer and trying to suss out your user name?

Imagine her sitting around with her frienda, plotting to see if she can get on a MIL thread! grin

gail734 Tue 30-Apr-13 16:23:00

OK, I'll ask you all a direct question: has anyone here, ever, in real life, heard a 65 year old woman (in the UK) call her husband "BABY"???

I bet sweet Orangey Love Pete is like this...

iliketea Tue 30-Apr-13 16:25:39

Nope (therefore, my previous post is totally plausible)

If your FIL frequently looks fed up then it sounds a bit sad and attention-seeking <bitter old hag me>

Someone once told me that part of growing up is accepting that your parents have sex but you will never be able to cope with the idea of them having oral sex.

Just wanted to add that to your mental photo album of the PILs grin

PanpiperAtTheGatesOfYawn Tue 30-Apr-13 16:40:18

Nope. She's high, for sure. Your FIL is fed up because he knows she's for the rehab again.

gail734 Tue 30-Apr-13 16:41:16

(Puts fingers in ears, closes eyes..) " Lalalalalalalalalalalalaaaa!"

ENormaSnob Tue 30-Apr-13 17:00:26

Anyone else reckon mil got the licking of a lifetime last night?

Maybe she was skipping because she'd got her love eggs in and the increased movement gives her an extra thrill?

Thingiebob Tue 30-Apr-13 17:04:45

I'm with Enorma

I think she was still riding on a BIG sex high.

HintofBream Tue 30-Apr-13 17:06:34

For heaven's sake Gail, lay off the ageism. Afternoon delight? Of course, that's one of the bonusses of being retired, lots of time to spare.

ScrambledSmegs Tue 30-Apr-13 17:08:02

Actually, I've just been reminded of an episode of House. Previously rickety elderly woman presents with a newfound lease of life and the raging horn. Her boring son is not amused.

OP, is there any chance your MIL has <whispers> syphilis?

The only time I've reacted like your MIL did today is when my Chinese takeaway arrived after 20 minutes when they had told me it would be an hour.

<I wish I was joking>

IcingTheCake Tue 30-Apr-13 17:18:00

YANBU you aren't criticising her just pointing out how odd (and pretty hilarious) it is! Hahaha i would love my mil to do this hahahaha bless them though, like a couple of schoolkids smile

greenformica Tue 30-Apr-13 17:21:37

cute but makes me wonder if she has her own life? Does she do anything interesting without him?

Loa Tue 30-Apr-13 17:26:36

Like many MIL threads its actually down to your DH.

He should have nixed this kind of public display of affection between his parents during his childhood years if not before his teenage years then definitely during them.

gail734 Tue 30-Apr-13 17:31:09

Mmmm... Southern, if it had been a Chinese takeaway I would have been jumping and clapping with her!

digerd Tue 30-Apr-13 17:46:24

I'm gobsmacked that she can run and skip. I'm her age < and a bit>, and I haven't been able to run or skip for yearssad envy.

But the excitement about seeing her "baby" after all those 5 hours apart, is a bit surprising. Wonder how FIL reacted?
I think it's amazing/peculiar. Acting like a teenager in love , strange .

Did you find it blush?

He was defo turning up with a prescription of Viagra

She'll be riding the pole all afternoon.

HintofBream Tue 30-Apr-13 17:58:50

Digerd, I'm nearly 69 and have recently returned from a skiing holiday; we are not all totally decrepit and many of us are well up for a bit of romance with our DHs.
Why is it OK to be obnoxious about oldies and sex, yet if anyone expressed distaste about people with disabilities making love, MN hell would let loose?

HoneyDragon Tue 30-Apr-13 18:00:14

Aaaaaaaw smile

My Mum and Dad always hold hands. And my Dad writes her little love poems.

She doesn't call him Baby though. She calls him Cunt, but she's dead affectionate when she does.

LifeofPo Tue 30-Apr-13 18:06:01

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GibberTheMonkey Tue 30-Apr-13 18:07:31

Your mum sounds cool honeydragon

They sound sweet
Both parents and my inlaws are happily married still and are obviously so. It's a lovely example to have of marriage.

BiteTheTopsOffIcedGems Tue 30-Apr-13 18:12:13

I agree with the sex comments. I think they were going to do bumsex.

HoneyDragon Tue 30-Apr-13 18:36:53

Sharon calls Ozzy Baby.

Is your FiL a rock star? Cool.

I agree with the sex comments. I think they were going to do bumsex.

On a Tuesday afternoon? shock shockshock

Montybojangles Tue 30-Apr-13 19:03:44

Are there set days for bumsex badgers?? confused

I think it's nice, I'm always happy to see the OH (so he can fetch and carry for me). I'm going to agree with the idea they haven healthy sex life. 60s is hardly over the hill for goodness sake!

BiteTheTopsOffIcedGems Tue 30-Apr-13 19:06:00

Yeah it's usually Friday.

SarahAndFuck Tue 30-Apr-13 19:07:26

Maybe they have been on one of those Meet the Fockers style sex therapy weekends or something, and have rediscovered each other.

Otherwise she would surely have been doing this for the entire time you have known them, and it wouldn't have come as such a shock.

Remember to knock before you walk in on your next visit. You don't know what you might walk into. grin

gail734 Tue 30-Apr-13 19:10:23

greenformica : She is a bit of a golf widow, but she does go out for lunch with all the other golf widows. It honestly didn't cross my mind that it had anything to do with sex. Not that silvershaggers shouldn't be having all sorts of sex, at any time of the day. I did find it a bit embarrassing - I don't know why. Just a bit sort of "heart on sleeve" or something. I was genuinely confused too, by the whole "baby" thing. I thought she was talking about her son, my DH. He's her baby, or was, forty years ago. I'd never heard anyone calling their spouse baby, except Justin Bieber.

musickeepsmesane Tue 30-Apr-13 19:15:26

gail we are messing with your head!! I had not realised this MIL stuff and retirement could be so exhausting. Thank goodness I have 15 years before I retire, I will need to buy some books. By books I mean sex manuals, but I will make sure I am busy on Fridays blush Is Justin Beiber married? confused

HintofBream Tue 30-Apr-13 19:16:17

Silvershaggers eh? How about fatties being called Porkypokers?

Montybojangles Tue 30-Apr-13 19:16:58

Thank you BiteTheTopsOff grin

miffybun73 Tue 30-Apr-13 19:17:09

Bit bonkers, but really lovely smile

Fillyjonk75 Tue 30-Apr-13 19:27:01

I'm with you OP, I think it's odd. Not necessarily bad odd, but still odd.

mrsmillsfanclub Tue 30-Apr-13 19:43:13

I have been known to clap hands excitedly and do a little dance- usually on the day that dh returns to work when he has been home for a long weekend, gotten under my feet and irritated the hell out of me.

HintofBream Tue 30-Apr-13 20:12:46

Thanks, Gail for giving us over-sixties permission to have "all sorts of sex,at any time of day". I think the patronising attitudes and the general amazement that sex and love can last are far odder than OP's MIL's activities. Jealous maybe?

PanpiperAtTheGatesOfYawn Tue 30-Apr-13 22:26:04

Hintofbream Re disabled/'oldies' hmm - we are all going to be old someday (hopefully). We are not all going to be disabled. Growing old is a fact of life, not an altered state, so it's not really an 'ism', is it?

I personally have absolutely no issues with older people having sex. I hope Gail's FIL and MIL are at it like rabbits. Gives me hope for the future. However I don't particularly want to imagine my ILs at it. Nor do most people, hence the mild hilarity here.

I do however find it odd when people get all ruffled-feathers over what has clearly turned into a rather silly light-hearted thread.

valiumredhead Tue 30-Apr-13 22:29:01


I still get butterflies when dh puts his key in the door and we've been together 22 years.

randomtask Tue 30-Apr-13 22:40:04

I hope I'm still excited to see DH when we've been married for so long, at the moment it tends to be me pointing out he's arrived and DS aged 2 and I running to the door to greet him!

As for having sex when we're retired, bloody hell yes-it'll be the first time we've had together without children or work so we'll have some catching up to do. wink

HintofBream Tue 30-Apr-13 22:44:34

Panpiper, does the fact that we are all, one hopes, going to get old, nean that we can never complain about prejudice against those who have attained that state? Why should we be compelled to conform to others' notions of appropriate behaviour?

Top marks for your marvellously passive-agressive final sentence.

PrincessFiorimonde Tue 30-Apr-13 22:52:33

OP asked: OK, I'll ask you all a direct question: has anyone here, ever, in real life, heard a 65 year old woman (in the UK) call her husband "BABY"???

Errrm, today, here in the SE of England, I heard a 63yo woman (a friend of mine) call her 61yo partner 'Baby'. Is her age close enough to answer the question and win my five pounds?

She didn't do any skipping, though.

<disclaimer: we live on the coast, so maybe it was just the sea spray that got her going vocalising>

musickeepsmesane Tue 30-Apr-13 23:15:27

This was a light hearted thread. The post made me smile. The replies made me smile. Hintof Bream, really?? I guess the expression 'life is too short' is inappropriate here

LimitedEditionLady Tue 30-Apr-13 23:40:10

Awwwww thats really sweet!
Maybe it looked strange because theyre older but thats really lovely.i dont know any couples like parents are a bit offish like that maybe just in front of people but i think its really romantic that shes missed him so much.FIL must be a bit like that to her for her to react like that.thats beautiful,i wish me and OH were like that now!

gotthemoononastick Wed 01-May-13 13:06:55

Over 60 here,married forever,Angelbaby-balls is what I say!!Shoot us for still being alive.

wealthypensioneriamnot Wed 01-May-13 18:43:53

Spot on seeker ! You just can't win whatever you do. Personally I think it's great that she misses him so much. Scary.... but great .

wealthypensioneriamnot Wed 01-May-13 18:47:47

Oh brilliant "moononastick" . !!! Can't think why we don't just wear our elasticated waist trousers and shuffle off into the sunset when we reach 60 .

wealthypensioneriamnot Wed 01-May-13 18:55:36

Oh stop it " iced gems " ...... I'm doing pig-snort laughs now and it sounds terrible .

Tuppence2 Thu 02-May-13 08:17:25

Ha! This is my stepdad! My mum works 3 days a week, he is retired and does nothing but play golf twice a week and watch dd 2 days. When he knows my dm is due home from work, he stands at the bay window to watch for her walking down the street! Its so funny! All that's missing is a wagging tail when she appears!
Then, as soon as she's in sight, he sprints to the kitchen to put their dinner on and make her a cuppa!

Now, this all sounds very sweet, until you realise they spend most of their time together winding each other up and bickering about stupid stuff! They are THE odd couple!

edwardsmum11 Thu 02-May-13 08:27:39

Yabu, so sweet.

MusicalEndorphins Thu 02-May-13 09:41:23

My aunt went on hormone replacement patches, and became very enamored with her gentleman friend whom she had been stepping out with for 10 years. She told me she didn't know what came over her, but she was suddenly crazy about him and was "necking" with this gentleman. Next thing you know, they were married.

Is your MIL on HRT?

mrsjay Thu 02-May-13 09:42:34

My aunt went on hormone replacement patches, and became very enamored with her gentleman friend whom she had been stepping out with for 10 years. She told me she didn't know what came over her, but she was suddenly crazy about him and was "necking" with this gentleman. Next thing you know, they were married.

bring on the HRT it might make me skip grin

digerd Thu 02-May-13 17:16:23

At 48, I went onto the strongest contraceptive pill to stop a period for a stressy occasion.
Within 20 minutes, my body and mind rejuvenated more than 20 years and I was on a high, giggling at things, and had so much energy and never felt tired.
20 years ago now, and can't remember if it affected my libido.

I did go on HRT a few years later, and do remember the romantic and libido feelings did increase, but DH was ill sad

WireCatWhore Thu 02-May-13 18:06:24

Maybe she was relieved at being rescued from you! wink

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