To be fuming at the Hermes delivery driver.

(134 Posts)
ComposHat Sun 28-Apr-13 21:06:50

I'd ordered a pair of shoes from Clarks (I've done this loads of times before) and have found the service to be fine.

This time they appear to be delivery company called Hermes (who is the Greek God of incompetent and lazy delivery drivers). I had to go and visit my parents unexpectedly and what do you know, there's a card in the communal hallway to the flat. Fair enough, I thought, I'll have to re-arrange delivery/collect from the depot. No problem with that at all.

But no, the idiot driver had dumped the parcel in a completely open communal backyard shared by about 15 different flats. When I got back - what a surprise - the parcel wasn't there.Leaving a package outside in full public view in the middle of a high crime area, who would have thunk it?

I logged onto the Herpes Hermes website and their auto tracking thing says that the customer (me) had not only received the item, but had signed for it!

AIBU to go absolutely crazy at Hermes and/or Clarks at 8:30 tomorrow morning? And what are my chances of getting my shoes replaced?

wendy1969 Sun 28-Apr-13 21:08:46


HollyBerryBush Sun 28-Apr-13 21:09:29

I'd move out of a crime ridden area grin

HoHoHoNoYouDont Sun 28-Apr-13 21:10:59

I feel your frustration.

I have just started using them to despatch orders to my customers since RM introduced silly prices. I have had the same trouble with them. Customers not receiving orders but the card saying it's been delivered. The drivers are lazy feckers.

They need a signature to prove you received the goods so you should be able to get a replacement order. Call Clarks tomorrow.

ComposHat Sun 28-Apr-13 21:11:14

Yeah cheers Holly never thought of that. But finances and all dictate that I can't afford to move to a leafy suburb.

emsyj Sun 28-Apr-13 21:11:52

I would ask for proof of signature and say it wasn't you who signed for it and that you want to know who did. Normally these courier firms have those little hand held things that you sign with an electronic pen thingummy so they should have a copy of the 'signature', which you can then prove isn't yours by showing them bank cards/driving licence or whatever?

Have you got the card saying it was left in the yard also?


MrsRogerSterling Sun 28-Apr-13 21:11:57

Well as you didn't sign for them he won't have your signature. Contact Clarks and have them deal with it for you rather than deal with Hermes yourself.

HoHoHoNoYouDont Sun 28-Apr-13 21:12:44

By the way, Clarks will get a refund from myHermes if the courier can't produce your signature.

I'm really sad that you wear Clarkes shoes, I thought you were cool.

Hermes is shit, there are so many complaints online about them. I reckon Clarkes will refund you.

ComposHat Sun 28-Apr-13 21:15:40

Itts a fair cop guv,

n my defence Akiss they were Originals Desert Boots, not velcro slippers or owt.

roofio87 Sun 28-Apr-13 21:17:06

hermes delivered a parcel to my sister's house and she wasn't in so they left it in the bin. the bin was outside the house waiting to be collected by the bin men. bye bye parcel!! unbelievable!!

LordEmsworth Sun 28-Apr-13 21:17:06

Yodel or HDN or whoever they are left me a big box of books a couple of weeks ago. The card they left told me they had left it in "a safe place".

The "safe place" was on my front door step, in full view of every passer by. But cleverly, they had disguised it by... putting the doormat on top of it.

I can only assume that the job application process for delivery drivers doesn't include a test of common sense...

digerd Sun 28-Apr-13 21:21:20

It wasn't your signature- so can be proved. I have Hermes deliver and is always the same man. But live in a small cul-de-sac <with nosy neighbours who would see any leaflet delivery person leaving my house with a parcel!>.
I am always in at lunch-time when he comes, so never had any problems.

If the Hermes deliverer left a card, then you were not in to sign for it, obviously, so there is your proof.
Good luck

TheseFoolishThings Sun 28-Apr-13 21:21:45

Shit. Really? I've also just started using them because of the absurd RM price increases - and I sell a lot on both Amazon and Ebay. Shitting shit - are they really really bad then?

MalcolmTuckersMyHero Sun 28-Apr-13 21:22:29

YANBU. I had the delights of a Hermes "delivery" recently. Doorbell went and I was literally just finishing changing DS's nappy but by the time I got there, he'd vanished leaving his crappy little "sorry I missed you" card. No number to call, no attempt to leave with a neighbour. Tried to contact them to rearrange, but they won't deal with me, only the Amazon seller as I'm not their customer! angry

HoHoHoNoYouDont Sun 28-Apr-13 21:26:25

TheseFoolishThings make sure you pay the extra for a signature. It annoys me to do this because as it's a courier company they should be getting a bloody signature anyway!

I started using them because of RM price hikes and I'd say within two weeks of using them I'm already into my third claim!

ExcuseTypos Sun 28-Apr-13 21:31:25


My DH ordered me a kitchen aid for my birthday, which the delivery driver left on the driveway, right near the road.hmm

I've waited years for a blooming kitchen aid. I still have flashbacks as to what could have happened. It could have been kidnapped or anything!

ComposHat Sun 28-Apr-13 21:35:43

Slightly more chipper now that most people seem to think I've a fighting chance of getting some replacement shoes or my money back.

I needed the shoes fairly rapidly, so I hope it doesn't turn into a long drawn out process!

mamma12 Sun 28-Apr-13 21:55:15

No way YANBU Hermes are a crock of shite. They "delivered" a pair of UGGs I'd paid £140 for from ASOS in my bin on bin collection day. When I called the driver on the card she'd left she screamed at me and said I should be grateful as other customers were grateful items are delivered into their bin. I laugh about it now but at the time I was fuming. However alot of these courier cos pay these drivers about 50p a parcel and convince the drivers theyre self employed so get round employment legislation and they only get that one 50p regardless of how many times they attempt to deliver it. you should complain to clarks (by law they have to refund you since they have not fulfilled their part of the agreement) and tell them to stop cutting corners and use a decent company

likeitorlumpit Sun 28-Apr-13 22:26:45

akissisnotacontract im glad you said it someone had to thank you . never heard a good word said about hermes.

SundaysGirl Sun 28-Apr-13 22:30:02

I was in my house one time when a postman walked up to the house and put a card through my letterbox saying I had not been in and needed to collect the package. Chased the bugger down the street to get it!

Beckamaw Sun 28-Apr-13 22:34:50

You just need to google 'Hermes reviews' to see how shit they are. Totally irresponsible with bollocks policies. They are cheap though.

ComposHat Sun 28-Apr-13 22:35:31


I have no shame in my love of the Clarks Desert Boot - it is a timeless classic.

I have numerous pairs in different fabrics. If I had to pick one pair of shoes to save from a fire it would be my French Navy Dessies.

It is just a pity they chose such useless shitehawks to deliver them.

lustybusty Sun 28-Apr-13 22:42:56

YASooooooooNBU!! Hermes "delivered" my iPhone screen protectors (so said their website). Not in my postbox. Not under the flat door. No card either! Not in the flat next door. Not in the flat across the hall. Nor his next door neighbour. Nor the housebound little old lady in the ground floor flat. I called O2 and asked them to ask Hermes to hold the delivery of the (one week post release) iPhone 4 at the depot as I was concerned the protectors had gone missing. No problem. Following day, iPhone 4 was "delivered" (so said website). Again, no card, not with any (logical) neighbour. Phoned Hermes, who wouldn't deal with me as not customer. Phoned O2. They arranged for the delivery driver, who couldn't remember what number he'd delivered it to. He came out to the flats to show me. He'd delivered it to the guy 1 floor down and diagonally opposite, who'd lived there 3 days.... and when I asked about perhaps letting me know where he'd posted it, he explained he'd left a card... In the other persons postbox! (So left a card for the guy who'd signed for it, telling him there had been a parcel left for him, at his!?)
Anyway. I now ask how an item will be delivered. If they say Hermes, I don't buy the item. Sorry guys.

tri10 Sun 28-Apr-13 22:45:13

Our Hermes delivery lady doesn't even knock on the door she just lobs it straight over the garden gateshock

LoganMummy Sun 28-Apr-13 22:50:00

We had this yesterday. £100 DVD player left in our bin as a safe place. Previously our deliveries have been left at front door in full view of everyone. Crazy!

stealthsquiggle Sun 28-Apr-13 22:52:38

Our local delivery drivers are generally pretty good - but then again unless the sheep have turned to crime they can leave parcels pretty safely - so they probably have a better delivery rate than their urban peers. I hope they get some sort of mileage rate, though.

OP - don't bother with Hermes. Talk to Clarkes. It won't come as a great shock to them.

IRCL Sun 28-Apr-13 23:13:41


I haven't actually had any dealings with hermes but yodel/hdnl are the bane of my life.

There is an interesting programme on ch4 soon about couriers. Be interesting to see which company they go undercover at.

pouffepants Sun 28-Apr-13 23:15:43

We don't get a mileage rate at all, all costs have to come out of the 45p rate that an average suburban courier will get per parcel. This rate hasn't changed for over 20 years.

I'm a rural courier, and actually make good money, but the suburban routes are easy to do so they pay bottom dollar and get amoeba I'm afraid.

ImAlpharius Sun 28-Apr-13 23:19:41

We got a hermes delivery put in our slop bucket shudders at the memory

MagratOfStolat Sun 28-Apr-13 23:30:57

DPD and Yodel are THE. WORST.


edinbuirgh80 Sun 28-Apr-13 23:45:46

Hermes and yodel are both crap. Not sure which one is worse. Yodel left an ipad ordered from john Lewis in a safe place. Yes ynder doormat. I nearly trod on it when I returned home in the dark.

ExcuseTypos Sun 28-Apr-13 23:54:23

tri10 sorry but your post made me laugh- she chucks it!!

She mustn't give a shit! I think I quite admire her.

HoHoHoNoYouDont Sun 28-Apr-13 23:55:22

My Hermes courier gets paid £1.95 for every parcel he handles. Over the last Christmas period he took 20k over a three month period. He works inner city so gets big contracts from retailers.

olivertheoctopus Mon 29-Apr-13 00:04:39

They should be able to show you a copy of the alleged signature.

brummiegirl1 Mon 29-Apr-13 00:12:21

I ordered a Kenwood mixer from Lakeland and I wasn't in when they delivered. The card said it wad over gate. I can just imagine how they threw my mixer over the gate! How it still works I don't know! Anyway I complained to Lakeland direct and they were really good and sent me vouchers and emailed a complaint to the head office of Hermes. If you contact Clarkes it will probably be a better bet than contacting Hermes. Terrible delivery service.

Yodel once tried delivering a parcel, I wasn't home, so they had to choose which neighbour to leave my expensive item with. The obvious choice - next door? Nope. Across the road? Nope. The drug house 8 doors down and round the corner with boarded up windows? Oh yes. Jokers.

onelittlepiglet Mon 29-Apr-13 02:25:16

Don't get me started on Hermes. They delivered a parcel and on the card it said 'left under front wheel of car'. I had to spend an hour in the dark on my road looking under the wheels of cars parked nearby. I eventually found the parcel (a dress from ASOS) balanced on the front wheel (under the arch) of a random car on my road!

Then for my birthday I ordered an iPad from John Lewis. I had saved up and it was an expensive (for me) purchase. It went 'missing'. Luckily JL sent a new one and were very good about it but even they had to admit that it was blatantly stolen by the Hermes driver who had tried to deliver it once and left a number and had their phone switched off ever since.

Totally rubbish!

Thumbwitch Mon 29-Apr-13 02:41:01

I think you should be able to get another pair sent out from Clarks, tbh, so contact them.

I had problems with HDN handling an Amazon delivery - they "couldn't find the address" (workplace, everyone else could find it no problem). After about a week of this shit, Amazon sent the order out again via RM, and it arrived next day (no extra cost to me). HDN finally delivered their version, by now much battered and torn, a few days later. I returned it to Amazon after phoning them to discuss what I should do - again, no cost to me, iirc they sent me a return label by email to print out and stick on the box and they paid for it.

YouDontWinFriendsWithSalad Mon 29-Apr-13 03:06:10

This happened to me, not with Hermes but with Amazon. Said it was signed for. I demanded to see the signature, they said they couldn't provide it. I demanded a full refund and got it.

Good luck...

PasswordProtected Mon 29-Apr-13 04:43:12

You have my sympathy as this has happened to me twice in the past 10 days. Goods left on front doorstep, once under doormat once wedged beside terracora pot, both in full view of road etc. & I had 'signed' both times. I complained to the companies shipping the goods.

TheFallenNinja Mon 29-Apr-13 05:26:30

Your contract is with whoever sold you the shoes, not the courier.

Going daft with them will further reduce your chances of getting stuff in the future. Just contact the vendor, tell them that you don't have the goods and let them do the chasing, they will deal with the courier as the contract for delivery is between them and the courier.

Hermes are shit.

likeitorlumpit Mon 29-Apr-13 07:41:15

i ordered something from amazon for over £100. my heart sank as soon as i saw it was a hermes delivery. straight away i knew i wouldnt get it. it went to my local depot 3 times before someone stole lost it. i never order if i know they are delivering.

ComposHat Mon 29-Apr-13 15:03:37

Spoke to Clarks, the driver had forged my signature on the electronic delivery machine they carry around. Unbelievable.

Clarks are taking the matter up with Hermes now.


God, reading all of this, I am so so gald my local delivery man is my neighbour!

I had to arrange a courier delivery of something for eBay and the Hermes prices were fab. Then I read the reviews! I didn't know it was possible to be worse than Yodel! Went with Royal Mail and the service was perfect.

Yodel left some books in an open envelope carefully propped up on my front wall in such a way that the gutter run-off would have run straight into the envelope. They didn't knock at all, we found the books hours after they left them, just before the rain came!

Thumbwitch Mon 29-Apr-13 15:47:45

Surely there is some level of criminal activity there, forging your signature? I mean aside from the sheer bonearsed laziness of it, it's forgery! They really ought to do something about it, make an example of the driver or something, so that other employees aren't tempted to continue doing the same. While nothing is done to stop them in this appalling behaviour, they will just carry on, and people will be sick to death of the uselessness of the delivery service. I personally can't believe anyone could want to run a business this way - if it was me and I had the reviews that Hermes have, I'd have been doing something about it by now!

valiumredhead Mon 29-Apr-13 15:51:51

I love my Hermes courier -she is very nice and friendly smile

phantomnamechanger Mon 29-Apr-13 15:52:46

My mums had this with some thing she ordered and she did not let it go till the company supplied a replacement for what she was supposed to have signed for - the "signature" was nothing at all like hers! I hoep the delivery driver got disciplined!

never had such a big problem myself but am right cheesed off with the number of people putting stuff in the stinky bin, too lazy to knock next door!

seriouscakeeater Mon 29-Apr-13 16:01:45

OH LORD! You have my sympathies, Yodel and Hermmes are both as bad! Pay for next day delivery...whats that?? I had to go through a week of the calling every day but no one in (strange as my DGM sat in ALL week for me) so they took delivery back! I had payed for next day delivery too. When she did finally turn up with her husband, she just said the van had been broke all week! my 81 year old nan played merry hell you cant even phone them, just shows how dodgy they are!

LisaMed Mon 29-Apr-13 16:06:10

My view is that if it isn't delivered/bought on the internet then it doesn't exist (had past problems getting out of the house).

My local delivery companies are actually lovely, I've had one or two odd bods but my regular postie is a sweetie and the lady who delivers Lakeland is lovely. My neighbours are also always around and are good about taking in parcels.

However I am well aware that I am extremely privileged, and some parcels I send to certain addresses fall into black holes. I now stick hard to RM, who have been the most reliable.

HoHoHoNoYouDont Mon 29-Apr-13 16:09:01

Spoke to Clarks, the driver had forged my signature on the electronic delivery machine they carry around. Unbelievable

shock - I hope they wipe the floor with him.

ComposHat Mon 29-Apr-13 16:16:33


I hope so too! S/he had scrawled my initials in the box, but then totally shot themselves in the foot, by leaving instructions on where the item had been left -abandoned--.

I worry this is the kind of 'service' we can get used to for all of our post if Royal Mail is broken up and sold off as the Tories seem hell bent on doing.

I think I will ask for the shoes to be delivered to the nearest store, as I have absolutely no confidence that Herpes will do anything different next time.

AlfieandAnnieRose Mon 29-Apr-13 16:26:39

Herpes! grin

HoHoHoNoYouDont Mon 29-Apr-13 16:37:04

Despite the price hikes from Royal Mail I still think their service is fantastic. I hope it doesn't get broken up!

stealthsquiggle Mon 29-Apr-13 16:53:05

In the past 10 days our postie has given me our post when we met in the farm shop, and waved me down as I passed him in the car to give me a parcel grin

He has also been known to sign for things himself, which is clearly dodgy but there is no way that I would shop him for it since we know and trust him and the item in question was always somewhere perfectly safe.

OP - if you are pushed for time now, delivery to the shop definitely sounds like the safe option.

Yodel guy has just redelivered parcel that he tried to deliver on Saturday and checked that we got the card, which I was a little confused about since the card was put through the letter box and I also got a text, but I guess over communicating is better than no communication.

MeNeedShoes Mon 29-Apr-13 17:13:54

I just found this thread and it was timely. I only have 2 experiences of Hermes:

- last week when they called. I was in. Didn't get any signature from me but gave me item. Hours later I received a text to say I had missed the delivery. Eh... no, I did not. I have the item.

- today. Allegedly I should have received my item. No sign of it. No calls while I was home and no card to say I've missed them. I'm in limbo here.

ComposHat Mon 29-Apr-13 17:16:17


Are you sure you aren't a character in the sixth sense?

MeNeedShoes Mon 29-Apr-13 17:26:19

Compos grin

Item just arrived! So in fairness they deliver later than I expected. Didn't get me to sign even though I offered to. There was nothing to sign.

RugBugs Mon 29-Apr-13 17:27:58

Glad Clarks are sorting it.
Our Hermes courier once threw two packages into a gated alley half a mile down the road, no card etc. Someone found them, took them in and dropped us a note to say they had them. Courier was adamant they'd delivered correctly.

GinOnTwoWheels Mon 29-Apr-13 17:29:09

trouble is that ebay, Amazon and all the other internet retailers try to pretend thar delivery is 'free', so pay a pittance to the delivery contractors.

the people delivering the parcels are self employed and get about 50p per parcel.

they have to exploit the tax credit and tax allowance for usimg own vehicles to make anything like a lviing wage.

this won't work under universal credit as it will be assumed that they are making minimum wage, which a lot won't be at the moment.

ComposHat Mon 29-Apr-13 17:32:45

meneed excellent!

GinYes, everyone should paid a living wage and I've worked for the minimum wage in a customer service environment, but I'd never lie, cheat and treat customers with such disdain.

WithASpider Mon 29-Apr-13 17:39:29

My local Hermes delivery man is fab, I use them for ebay too since RM put the prices up.

There was a problem with the parcels he was supposed to be collecting today (my fault) so he's coming tomorrow for them. No issue with where he leaves parcels either.

Lovely man.

AeschylusandtheTortoise Mon 29-Apr-13 17:45:56

I was nearly run over by our ( usually lovely) Hermes delivery lady, who reversed towards me without looking in her mirror! Had to dive out of her way.
That said, she works all the hours god sends, drops things round to my workplace if I'm not in, gets paid a pittance for each parcel she delivers and has money docked if she delivers late, even if the goods are not delivered to her on time.

ComposHat Mon 29-Apr-13 18:14:52

The delivery driver has just been round and told me that the package had been stolen by my neighbours and said it was 'all bollocks' charming.

I was too flabergasted to say much in response.

Flisspaps Mon 29-Apr-13 18:40:39

I'd be straight back on the phone to Clarks, to ask them to report to Hermes on your latest visit from him.

Did your thieving neighbours forge your signature too? hmm Arsewipe.

DeskPlanner Mon 29-Apr-13 19:22:35

He came back to your house ! shock I'd find that really intimadating.

TheRealFellatio Mon 29-Apr-13 19:28:24

I got all excited then, thinking you'd ordered some fabulous silk scarves and handbags. sad

ComposHat Mon 29-Apr-13 19:29:56

To be fair, the card which I'd left had his mobile number on it and I called it when I got the card. It wasn't totally unsolicited but he was quite aggresive all the same.

It does make me a bit nervous about kicking up too much of a fuss in case he keys the car, smashes the window etc.

IHateSafeStyle Mon 29-Apr-13 19:34:34

You do need need to speak to them at all, your contract is with Clark's they must send you a new pair or refund you (do the job of the person you would speak to for a different company)

HoHoHoNoYouDont Mon 29-Apr-13 19:34:39

trouble is that ebay, Amazon and all the other internet retailers try to pretend thar delivery is 'free', so pay a pittance to the delivery contractors.

I'm an Internet and Amazon retailer. I pay the same amount of postage as everyone else. What I charge for p&p is clearly stated so that no one feels ripped off.

JerseySpud Mon 29-Apr-13 19:39:00

It is unfortunatly fairly common that they do forge your signature.

Thank god i don't have to deal with them very much :\

Arisbottle Mon 29-Apr-13 19:40:05

Am I the only one reading this, who thought " how much money must the OP have, I order to have her own personal Hermes delivery driver" as in Hermes scarves etc.

TheRealFellatio Mon 29-Apr-13 19:41:26

Ha! no - see my post a little bit upthread!

Arisbottle Mon 29-Apr-13 19:43:28


ginmakesitallok Mon 29-Apr-13 19:54:11

I got a couple of things delivered by yodel a couple of weeks ago. Left safely in my garage, with note through my door. Which would have been great, except they also left a wireless printer which wasn't for me, but was addressed to someone completely different who lives 2 streets away at a different numbered house......

ProphetOfDoom Mon 29-Apr-13 19:54:42

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

furbaby Mon 29-Apr-13 19:57:35

I do feel your pain op .... love love desert boots shock
I wish all companys would just use royal mail , our postie is fantastic and you always know when abouts in the day he comes .
He always signs and leaves our parcels in the shed and locks it after . He does go the extra mile too when my friend sent some doggy treats to my beloved dog he put them in shed even though they would fit through door as parcel was addressed to the dog he realised that darling dog would have opened them before we got home from work .
Don, t expect many dogs get their own post smile

ComposHat Mon 29-Apr-13 19:57:42

I can just imagine Hermes scarves being delivered by the foul mouthed scruffy herbert (imagine a Roy Chubby Brown who hadn't washed or shaved for a few weeks) who arrived on my doorstep in a smokey and rust flecked transit. I don't know, perhaps White Van Man chic is all the rage in Paris this season. (Accesorize with a king sized lucozade and a copy of the Daily Sport)

As a gentleman mumsnetter a Hermes scarf would be of no interest to me. Tootal scarves I have plenty of, but Hermes no!

Twinklestarstwinklestars Mon 29-Apr-13 20:04:42

Our Hermes driver is great, the most reliable of all, brings me my friends parcels when she's at work and she's not a neighbour.

TheCraicDealer Mon 29-Apr-13 20:11:33

I'm also awaiting some Clarks original shoes courtesy of Hermes (kestrel soar sandals, this weather better perk up!). I'd never heard of them so had a quick google and immediately started to worry about the whereabouts of my shoesies. Still not here, a week later. If they don't arrive tomorrow I'm ringing clarks and will use my shouty ulsterwoman voice.

I have the desert wedges Compo. They are the best shoes in the world! I have an addiction to the originals range [looks at peach ballet pumps]

Flisspaps Mon 29-Apr-13 20:13:32

Very interesting programme on C4 about this right now!

hopkinette Mon 29-Apr-13 20:14:03

I want to work for Hermes.

ComposHat Mon 29-Apr-13 20:27:02

Oh Craic they are great my fiancee has them in white and tan and assures me they are the most comfortable sandals she's ever owned. Hope yours turn up soon - after your shouty Ulsterwoman voice and my dithery West Midlands/East of Scotland voice Clarks won't know what's hit them.

I have two pairs of Desert boots (should have been three!) a pair of Desert Treks and a pair of Oberons (which look like something a geography teacher from the 70s would wear) and a couple of more pairs mouldering away somewhere.

The ones I'd ordered and are now missing in action were for our wedding, I couldn't imagine wanting to wear any other type of footwear on our wedding day.

chocolatemartini Mon 29-Apr-13 20:32:23

Hermes driver this week left a parcel on a ledge overlooking the basement of our Victorian house (flat). I actually had to climb over the safety railings and risk slipping down a 7ft drop to retrieve the parcel. I was a bit hmm but reading this thread I am no longer surprised.

mylovelymonster Mon 29-Apr-13 20:37:20

We had this with my daughter's x-box for her birthday. Driver had said it was left at an outbuilding - we searched within a half mile radius with no luck. Amazon were actually fabulous and sent a new one out by professional courier which arrived by lunchtime the following day.

Contact Clarks. Your package was never delivered so it needs replacing. End of.

mylovelymonster Mon 29-Apr-13 20:41:57

I must say that the driver concerned was a temp. Our usual Hermes lady is lovely and has a good idea of when she will catch us in.
I still don't get why they don't leave you any notification/card when they attempt delivery tho - how do I know they've attempted delivery at the correct address (in stix) if there's no card?

Other couriers are rubbish - have had boxes left on the drive in the pouring rain all day before. Absolute mush when I 'received' them.

mylovelymonster Mon 29-Apr-13 20:43:46

Is anyone here going to buy shares in the Royal Mail? Think they could really do well due to their network and the rubbish competition - if they up their game.

Ha ha. Had a Hermes delivery yesterday! Idiot driver came roaring up our quiet culdesac like a bat out of hell, , and looked at me like I was mad when I pointed out that there are a lot of children and free range cats here.

WellardGrandpa Mon 21-Oct-13 18:56:01

I've joined this castigatory (look it up) thread in defence of my Hermes lady. She always delivers. She knows where I can be found when not in and early in our acquaintance she asked for my mobile number and put it in her LBB. Admittedly I'm a civil old gent and the poor thing swooned clean away on our first meeting, when, new to the job, she had fucked up quite badly and I gave her the full chivalric beans. I am going to order socks from Asos in a minute and I will return with a report. In the meantime I will, on the advice of my granddaughter, explore the joint and see what you all get up to. There are other blokes here, I gather. Bless.

Chopsypie Mon 21-Oct-13 19:07:38

Another voice in defence of a lovely local Hermes delivery person. They do exist!

I also have a v nice postie who signs for stuff and hides things in various (usually very good) places.

kay1975 Mon 21-Oct-13 19:38:30

I had this with clarks a couple of weeks ago! The electronic sig from Hermes was "SNR", so I emailed clarks and Hermes to ask who signed for it and apparently "SNR" means sig not required and clarks allows them to leave the package in a place they deem suitable!! Clarks did send me out another pair of boots, which Hermes again left in the front garden, but at least I found them this time!!

myBOYSareBONKERS Mon 21-Oct-13 20:21:33

This is an old thread - but is the OP still around to give a follow up?

dementedma Mon 21-Oct-13 20:32:05

Hermes are shite. I ordered stuff from Topshop for dds birthday and got an email from topshop saying that the courier had tried to deliver 3 times and had returned the parcel to the warehouse. Bollox. I had left an alternative delivery option and we hadn't had one card, let alone 3 through the letterbox. You can't contact them either to complain.

HereComesHoneyBooBooDragon Mon 21-Oct-13 20:34:54

sad for one joyous moment I thought Compo was back

my hermes lady'hid'my parcel behind the bin in the pouring rain! it was ruined so the company had to send me another item which she cleverly 'hid' inside the bin. doh! hmm

WhatAFunnyPotato Mon 21-Oct-13 20:47:36

Argh, I hate Hermes. Utterly stupid w*nkers.

Got card through the door recently saying parcel was 'in the garden'. I have a six foot fence around my back garden, with a drop of several feet below that.

Yep, the driver had lobbed the parcel over the fence. It had been raining and the goods (fortunately, not fragile) were soaking angry

Aroundtheworldandback Mon 21-Oct-13 20:57:08

I had similar from Hermes- package was thrown over garden gate but actually landed in the thick of a hedge, undiscovered for two weeks...

legoqueen Mon 21-Oct-13 21:00:05

Boden seem to have started using Hermes. Parcel containing new coat for DS was left on our doorstep in full street view on Saturday morning <screams>

JerseySpud Mon 21-Oct-13 21:06:01

I now have a fantastic My Hermes driver who leaves my parcels in the play house in the back garden so i don't have to rearrange delivery grin

Doubtfuldaphne Mon 21-Oct-13 22:17:41

I've been refunded by a retailer when I said that I hadnt received my order even though Hermes had said it's been delivered (but with no signature)
My sister recently nearly lost £300 on an order left in a communal block of flats. It took a lot of work to get the couriers to admit they'd got it wrong and here was no signature. She did get refunded though after 3 weeks.
If you paid by paypal you can raise a case with them too

YoniGetAnOohWithTyphoo Mon 21-Oct-13 23:09:17

This happened to my sister. Find out who apparently signed for it. If they give you a name/flat number tell that person you know they have it. (My sister's neighbour played the innocent at first until she threatened to get the police involved). Definitely boll*ck have a chat with customer services. Good luck.

Caitlin17 Mon 21-Oct-13 23:40:04

I'm slightly surprised they are allowed to use the name "Hermes"

I saw the title and thought what possibly could Hermès, purveyors of extraordinarily nice silk scarves have done to upset the OP.

I don't think Clark's will be difficult.

Mogz Tue 22-Oct-13 07:33:49

Fucking Hermes once threw a large box marked fragile over my 8ft garden fence, knocking a hole in my rabbit's run. Rabbits then escaped from garden and in to the parking lot behind our houses. Took hours after work to catch them back up and one had a cut on her face. Contents of parcel completely smashed (small glass vivarium) AND the fucker had the audacity to mark the delivery as signed for! Complained and was told it was my fault as I hadn't specified a 'safe place' or left instructions for the driver, they were just not interested in acknowledging that perhaps their delivery method was a little flawed and that they'd damaged my property. Quickly changed their tune when I threatened to take the buggers to small claims court.

TheFastCanadian Tue 05-Nov-13 00:01:10

I am a Hermes courier. I don't get paid £1.95 per parcel, I wish I did! I get 45p per parcel. My round is just north of Portsmouth, so you can call it Wymering which is average crime rate area for UK stats.

I have heard lots of horror stories about couriers losing parcels, signing for customers and generally giving the great couriers a really bad name!

I would be really offended to be called a lazy fucker who dumps people's parcels in plain view of public areas? I am not sure 60-100 parcels a day is lazy. Sometimes you got to put over gates, and in recycling bins or last ditch if there isn't anywhere suitable to hide/leave we have to carry forward increasing load the next day? It is a very very physical job that requires strength and stamina, you cannot be lazy or weak and those who are don't last long.

When I am not a courier, I am not wasting my life on benefits but doing a fulfilling if not poorly paid job while in school hours. My wife is s Midwife, so I generally am main childcare facilitator. I get them to school the get my parcels delivered (with greatest care and common sense) then pick them up from school again. I also do my history degree part time and play and run a hockey team on saturdays. So I really do find it hurtful and ignorant to be called lazy by people who have lost a parcel yet bitch about a job they know very little about?

Sorry mums

Ooh I hate my delivery woman angry

She once handed me a parcel that looked as though it had been used as a football , It was a plastic toybox & it was in bits & yet she insisted it was supposed to look like that hmm

Canadia I/They are not saying that All Couriers are Lazy , but their is a vast majority that really are incompetent fools .

TheFastCanadian Tue 05-Nov-13 00:25:24

What would you do if you were say me delivering your shoes and nobody in the entire block of 15 flats is in or willing to take your parcel because they find you obnoxious, or they are fed up with all the stuff you order on a daily basis? Remember you got 5 hours to pick up kids from school and say 55 parcels after this one? How long does it take to knock on everyones door to not get a safe neighbour? Say you get no access and have to do doorbell calling from what seem like a broken intercom?

It takes a lot of time a willpower to call 15 flats when in the back of your mind you have limited time in day, people calling you for collections all the time and day issues with Hermes computer signature box. This one parcel could take 30 minutes out of three days before it's returned undeliverable because of access or customer unavailable, all for 45p I personally don't leave in public areas but the pressure to get job done might push a handful of couriers too?

TheFastCanadian Tue 05-Nov-13 00:33:35

I see parcels squished, wet, with holes, rattling, speaking spanish, obviously broken. That doesn't mean I did it. When they are dragged out of depot in rain they are not treated mistreated but time is money. I see loads of parcel rely poorly packed to save money which the biggest false economy!

TheFastCanadian Tue 05-Nov-13 00:46:58

But your interpretation of an incompetent fool holds no water unless you have ever done job? Thinking on your feet and delivering 15-20 parcels an hour plus collections, dealing with bin men in your way, juggling trades button times, fatigue and tiredness from trotting around. You got to be switched on! A girl covered my round while I was on holiday last week. I have come back to total carnage, with parcels missing, unexplained complaints blatant thieving however cannot prove, and a totally undelivered Fri, sat round. The day I returned I had 75 parcels, plus 129 she dumped back at depot. It took me from 7am to 9pm to complete just over 215 drops/pick ups. She was sacked and is one of these half hearted people who probably thought it was easy peezy. She is being done for fraud and theft to for good measures.

TheFastCanadian Tue 05-Nov-13 00:50:52

Also you can refuse an item?

Hiding this thread now as cba with your rant .

firawla Tue 05-Nov-13 01:19:09

I get a higher than average amount of parcels delivered (several per day normally) and tbh the vast majority of couriers are pretty good I very rarely have a problem. Might depend on area, being in block of flats etc but we have moved around a fair bit and not had many problems anywhere. Where I am now, hermes delivery person is my neighbour directly opposite which is pretty handy tbh! But get from dpd, yodel etc and not really any problem from any of them. I'm quite grateful for my local postmen and delivery people they make my life easy by doing their job well! Sure there are crap ones around and it is a total pain when parcels get lost but many delivery people hermes included are pretty good so i respect you for the work you do fastcanadian

Twinklestarstwinklestars Tue 05-Nov-13 01:32:19

Our Hermes lady is great, she brings me my friends parcels if not in and I only have to text her and hide returns in a hiding place. She's much better than the dx, ups and yodel who go to a totally different address!

Zingy123 Tue 05-Nov-13 07:15:25

Our one seems to think my porch is the local depot. If anyone within about 20 houses isn't in he dumps them in my porch. I don't even know half the neighbours. I have now left a note telling him they will be disposed of in future. I came home one day and couldn't even get in my own porch as he had left a huge box there.

birdybear Tue 05-Nov-13 07:31:14

Wellardgrandpa- i would presume the majority of people know what castigatory means. Did you mean to be so rude and condescending when writing in brackets 'look it up'?

PatoBanton Tue 05-Nov-13 07:39:13

TheFastCanadian, the whole set up sounds like a fucking mess.

If it's truly that bad then you haven't got a leg to stand on...the company shouldn't be in business.

rastamouserules Tue 05-Nov-13 07:47:12

This thread has Madame laugh. I have been having big probs with my Hermes driver. have a little brick out house built on the side of my house which used to house my oil burner now I'm gas this is empty. Not only does Hermes man stash my parcels whether I'm in it not but he puts my neighbours parcels their to. I feel like a RM sorting office FFs

Strumpetron Tue 05-Nov-13 07:52:58

I can't name one good courier. I've worked with many over the years and they're all shite.

Sick of arguing with drivers. Sick of having to argue with customers because they think it's our fault the couriers are shit. Can't blame them though because they are.

ALWAYS get drivers effing and blinding at me 'this address doesn't exist' hmm yes it fucking does you gobshite I'm looking at it on google maps. Then try to bully me for my clients number, which I refuse to give as they are vulnerable adults and I'm not havig them idiots speak to them like they speak to me. RANT OVER

Yodel threw dd2's Christmas present over the fence - it was a ds lite. I returned it. They also left a HUGE Boden parcel in my completely open and in view of the street porch area. When I got home it wasn't there........the next day my neighbour came round with it. The postman had seen it there, thought it would get nicked and moved it, giving it to her. I think he thought she would come straight round with it when I got home but she cba I guess. By then I'd given Boden such an earful that they were preparing to refund me (which I then cancelled) and have put Royal MAil only on my account.

mitchsta Tue 05-Nov-13 10:13:26

YANBU. Hermes are shit. They once left my Amazon order (books) outside in the rain (and I mean heavy rain for DAYS, not just a bit of unexpected drizzle). Needless to say, the [cardboard] packaging and contents were completely ruined by the time I got home and Amazon had to re-send my order. 'Twas a very sad sight, that pile of soggy books...

ena19 Wed 20-Nov-13 13:44:39

I am surprised if Ebay knows that this company is a doggy, why they allow to use it to seller. Ebay doesn't offer any protection as for them the tracking number is valid. So they don't deliver , you chase the seller, you chase ebay as you cannot contact Hermes as buyer. Really disgusting. and I must say I am not happy with Ebay that knows the problem and just blame you if you claim. Hermes is a scam company, They leave the parcel outside and put in the tracking "delivered".....

PearlArgyle Wed 20-Nov-13 13:50:37

Our Hermes delivery person is lovely and efficient. I'm surprised only 45p per parcel!

DisgraceToTheYChromosome Wed 20-Nov-13 14:03:34

Haven't bothered reading the full thread but: most home deivery companies are shit and employ shitheads.

I was asked by one if I wanted a job on the artic side. £7.50 ph, when everyone else was paying £10. Pffft.

enriquetheringbearinglizard Wed 20-Nov-13 14:09:15

*TheFastCanadian, the whole set up sounds like a fucking mess.

If it's truly that bad then you haven't got a leg to stand on...the company shouldn't be in business.*

Agreed. I think your complaints should be against your employer Fast
not its customers.

We used to have a really good HDN delivery man, very good.
Last Christmas I felt so sorry for a private courier delivering on behalf of Debenhams. It was embarrassing for me. I'd put in a very large order, but they sent it all out piecemeal and the poor guy was here what seemed like almost every day over a two-three week period. I tried saying, just wait and bring them all at the same time, but they didn't.

Have had far too many awful experiences to detail, but once couriers for M&S left six boxes of wine in an open public foyer despite the door with the bell being right there and the office being manned. Driver admitted where he'd left them and M&S resent the order.

Last year I had a real row with a delivery company who insisted I wasn't in. They got their driver on the phone while I held and the driver admitted in the end that no he hadn't left a card and he didn't really know if we were in because he hadn't even been to the house hmm

Leaving parcels in plain sight on the doorstep or in a wheelie/recyling collection bin is just ridiculous.

Fleta Wed 20-Nov-13 14:34:30

Nothing you say TheFastCanadian is ANY fault of the person who is hoping to receive a parcel. My contract is with the company who I have bought from who employ Hermes to deliver - that is all I actually need to know.

The last time Hermes delivered to us they delivered an exceedingly valuable parcel to our neighbours.....and then put the card to say what they had done through the same neighbours door. Brilliant.

It doesn't take much more than a modicum of common sense to not leave a parcel in full view of the street / in a bin / in the pouring rain / throw it over a gate.

OatcakeCravings Wed 20-Nov-13 15:02:15

My Hermes delivery lady is fantastic, never had an issue at all and I get about 2 -3 parcels a week. It must depend on where you live...

Purpleknickers Wed 20-Nov-13 15:18:14

My Hermes lady is also fantastic

bigb263 Fri 10-Oct-14 22:25:05

Groupon and Hermes are dreadfull looks like hermes are still employing people who can't deliver a parcel to the correct people and groupon are saying they cant give a refund as it was signed for asked for proof and they keep skirting the request

mindthegap79 Fri 10-Oct-14 23:40:36

A friend sent me a 10kg bar of Cadbury's for my birthday. It arrived in full purple branded cardboard. The courier left it propped against the front door in full sunshine, where it sat for hours

Giant fondue anyone?

QuintessentiallyQS Fri 10-Oct-14 23:50:30

Why would he actually leave a card if you had signed for it? Surely he has lied to the system that you had signed? (In many firms the couriers get better pay if they manage to deliver to an actual person, so they may chose to say that you signed and hope for the best)

kikisunflower Fri 10-Oct-14 23:58:58

I had my first delivery today from Hermes in fact who left items with a neighbour. I nearly had a fit when I thought it was to the wierd neighbours opposite till my DS pointed out it was my lovely neighbour 2 doors down instead.

EatShitDerek Sat 11-Oct-14 00:04:09

I once got a card posted as the item couldn't be delivered because:

'The address couldn't be found'

Yes! It was found to post a card yet not to deliver my item!

That was the best card ever! I rang up and explained what the card said. They thought I was joking!

BedBugged Sat 11-Oct-14 00:16:54

It Hermes man is amazing. The nicecest most sensible person. He figured out our working patterns and makes our deliveries accordingly. I love him. If we do happen to be out and he leaves a card I give him a quick call ato say when we will be in and he drops the parcel then

hsun Wed 22-Oct-14 09:55:48

So glad i found this thread cos i've recently lost a £1000 bag and i'm pretty sure the delivery lady is carrying my bag right now(or sold it for crack). My parcel never came when it was supposed to and when tracked online it showed it's been delivered with a signature!! I phoned hermes up and they couldn't do anything cos 'they can't find the delivery lady'. Then she came again 2 days later to deliver another parcel of my, i confronted her she admitted she 'doesn't remember delivery a parcel to me' but refused to answer where she got a signature from! I secretly recorded everything hoping i could use this as evidence against if 'they get the police involved' (£1000 parcel missing and forged signature)! How naive of me cos no one actually gave a toss where my bag went, seller got there money thru insurance, hermes prop does the same but i've lost the bag i was looking for for years and still have the same lady delivery my parcel every week!(sure i got my money back but that's not the point!!)

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