to take out an enormous bank loan and get me a gastric band?

(62 Posts)
AtYourCervix Tue 23-Apr-13 07:43:11

I have an extremely unhealthy relationship with food.
The thinnest I have been and when I looked my best I was pretty much bullimic.

I am now old and fat. I don't like being fat. I start the day in a healthy frame of mind then crave carbs and butter and shit. I'm all or nothing. At a push I can be 'good' for a month, drop a stone, then return to 'normal' and over do the cheese, bread, butter and wine. Again.
Dietwise- you name it I've done it. For a month or so until I get bored and think I can control it and have just a little.
I am unreasonable. I know I am. But I am also a bit desperate.
If I were to do a band I have some questions.
Where? How much? How quickly? Would someone as weird and obsessive and crap with food be able to break it? If not surgery what elae?

trixymalixy Tue 23-Apr-13 07:47:17

My sister has lost nearly 8 stone after having a hypnotherapy gastric band. It has really changed her attitude to food. I'd give that a go before having such a drastic operation which won't have any effect on your relationship with food, just your ability to eat it.

Mosman Tue 23-Apr-13 07:53:56

You would save a fortune in food and be able to pay the loan off ... is that helpful, it is meant to be grin

AtYourCervix Tue 23-Apr-13 07:54:52

That's the logic that works for me Mos.

Do hypno thingys actually work?

DamnBamboo Tue 23-Apr-13 07:56:12

Unless you address your bad relationship with food, getting a band is pointless. They are not the magical solution you think and if you do't address you eat, you will simply stretch your pouch and put the weight back on.

this is actually not uncommon in people who don't get the appropriate CBT to deal with their issues with food.

So whilst YANBU, you are uninfomred and should seek treatment to help you get to the root cause of your problem, which isn't just about what you put in your mouth, but why you put it in there.

hedgefund Tue 23-Apr-13 07:56:34

how much is it?

DamnBamboo Tue 23-Apr-13 07:57:43

CBT, coaching of some kind...all of these things will help you change your behaviour.

You may well find that you don't even need a band.

And good on your for thinking about doing something about it.

Honestly, you sound like me. Like you have an extremely unhealthy attitude towards food and would probably not benefit from a band.

I would love a band myself, as my problem is overeating, but I know this would lull me into a false sense of security and I would stretch out my stomach again until I was fat again. I do it every time I lose weight (not this time hopefully!)

I'd like to try and hypnotherapy one, but I fear my underlying opinion that it is all bullshit would make it not work!

AtYourCervix Tue 23-Apr-13 08:01:22



DilysPrice Tue 23-Apr-13 08:03:07

Do a load of research on the power of placebo Jackie. That might convince you that it may be bullshit, but it's bullshit that can work - and once you are convinced of that, your mind is free to let it work it's bullshitty magic on you.

DamnBamboo Tue 23-Apr-13 08:03:49

No, don't say damn.
Give yourself a bloody big pat on the back for recognising that it's not as simple as cuttting back (forcibly or otherwise).

You've realised this, and that's a big thing! Now move with this and take the next step in getting the help you need.

AtYourCervix Tue 23-Apr-13 08:04:27

Jackie - that is what I also fear. My cinicidm would thwart it.

Would that also be a problem with CBT?
I know what the problem is. I know what my issues are. I know why. I know how to eat healthily. I know what I should or shouldn't do. I know.

Problem is knowing doesn't stop it.

BalletIsMyNemesis Tue 23-Apr-13 08:04:35

I want to echo what Bamboo just said, I have a friend who has lost 6 stone with a gastric band and has the body she wanted but her very unhealthy relationship with food remains unchanged.

She is seriously struggling to maintain her weight loss as she still eats all the wrong foods. Having lost the weight she is now trying to learn a new way of life but has no tools or strategies to help her.

If you go for it make sure you have support and help in place or it won't work, especially if you tend to bore of an eating regime after a month or so.

NewAtThisMalarky Tue 23-Apr-13 08:07:17

There's a weightloss app called easyloss which takes you hypnotherapy sessions and ultimately to a hypno gastric band - a lot of people are having good success with it, and it's much cheaper with a lot of support on Facebook etc.

Worth a look.

SoupDragon Tue 23-Apr-13 08:11:58

Paul McKenna does a hypnotic gastric band - the book is only about £10 or so and thus cheaper than real one - even if it doesn't work you've not lost much.

AtYourCervix Tue 23-Apr-13 08:12:40

I'll be over it by lunchtime. And back to my normal rotund self.

I think if you were overly obese then you get it on the NHS?, Have you explored the GP route?. They can recommend good slimming clubs or in some cases prescribes diet pills. I wouldn't think about having a gastric band lightly, it's major surgery and things can go horribly wrong.
I second other posters and suggest the hypno bands, it's worth a try if nothing else.

TheYamiOfYawn Tue 23-Apr-13 08:20:23

A friend has horrible, life-threatening complications from gastric band surgery, so I'm not keen on them.

januaryjojo Tue 23-Apr-13 08:22:34

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ENormaSnob Tue 23-Apr-13 08:23:08

I wouldn't tbh.

I know 2 people that have had it done. 1 lost a few stone and has put it all back on. The other has lost the weight but her hair and skin looks dreadful. She actually looks malnourished.

Could you get a loan and get a nice new car, book a dream holiday and then join slimming world or weight watchers? I found being weighed weekly have me more incentive not to cheat.

emsyj Tue 23-Apr-13 08:27:36

If you check on the weight loss board, there are a couple of threads of folk using the Paul McKenna Hypnotic Gastric Band (I've just ordered mine - £7 with free delivery on amazon) reporting amazing results - also the original 'I Can Make You Thin' has a few threads on it. I used to be a Weightwatchers fan but the whole counting, writing it down, weighing and measuring and never being able to go out without starving for a week beforehand just gave me a headache and I think promotes an unhealthy view of food. I used Hypnobirthing with both my labours and found it hugely helpful and effective, so why not try the same sort of thing with my weight?

Lucyellensmum95 Tue 23-Apr-13 08:32:35

But how fat are you? I'm a size 20, im happy wiht that, yes id like to be a bit thinner but hey ho. I wonder if you need to address your body image rather than your relationship with food - start to like yourself a bit more and think about eating a healthy diet rather than a diet. Don't make the goal losing weight, make the goal FEELING better. I lost a load of weight after i had DD, i was a size 12 (I had gallstones - best diet in the world, if you eat = agony!) and I was MISERABLE, but its not who i am. I'm a big girl - i can cycle 20-30 miles and walk for hours. I'm not saying i eat well, at the moment i probably o eat too much shite but it wouldnt be too much of a jump for me to go on a health kick, the minute it comes to depriving me of the food that i want, fuck it. I am quite happy to eat healthy food, knowing i can have a packet of crisps if i want them - i tend not to eat much chocolate, because i CAN!

januaryjojo Tue 23-Apr-13 08:33:05

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

orangeandlemons Tue 23-Apr-13 08:39:40

I'm with you. I have tried everything, including all mckenna stuff and paid 500 quid for a hypno gastric band. None of them worked despite my perseverance.

I think when your eating is out of contol as mine is, it takes more than changing attitudes. If I could do that I wouldn't be considering a gastric band. For me, I want to reset my eating thermostat as it'scompletely off the wall, and I'm pretty desperate. I don't know how to/can't do it despite everything.

Go for it is my advice

mummymeister Tue 23-Apr-13 08:41:48

OP you have said ...I know what the problem is. I know what my issues are. I know why. I know how to eat healthily. I know what I should or shouldn't do. I know....

There is a gulf between knowing and understanding. A GB is a huge operation. it carries a lot of risks and is not a quick fix. it will have implications for your health for years and once done cannot be undone. There is no quick fix for eating disorders or weight loss. if there was I would be first in the queue. you have to try lots of different things until you find the one that works for you. it could be a book, hypnotism, counselling, exercise, sw, ww or whatever. Overeating is self abuse and it is also an addiction. there is no quick fix. stop looking for them and start trying out things that will help you to understand the issue. good luck.

orangeandlemons Tue 23-Apr-13 08:43:41

But what if you have tried all those things to no avail? I have failed at all of them spectacularly.

Sometimes drastic action may be the only option

orangeandlemons Tue 23-Apr-13 08:44:22

...and I think they can be undone, and they aren't reallynthatbig an operation

JakeBullet Tue 23-Apr-13 08:48:43

AtYourCervix, have you tried LowCarb diets? I am eating based on Low Carb principles and I have never felt so well, There is an active Low Carb thread under the Big Slim topic and the people there are great. Yes you can eat butter and cream but not bread, pasta, potatoes etc (or only rarely). I have lost well over a stone since starting this way of eating and have not counted a single calorie.

Take a look at "Escape the Diet Trap" by Dr John Briffa (or just google his name). The Diet Doctor (a Swedish doctor) is also a fantastic website and it's all based upon sound scientific principles. Basically concentrating on foods that don't spike the blood sugar and stimulate a massive insulin response. IN Sweden this is now an accepted way f eating...and as the butter sales in Sweden have increase so their levels of obesity are starting to fall. Trust me on this...sugars and carbs are the issue.

AtYourCervix Tue 23-Apr-13 08:52:09

I have tried WW. SW. Pills. Veganism. Bullimia. 5:2. Atkins. Low carb. Low fat. Low calorie. I am active. I walk. I go to the gym. I am genetically lazy and greedy. I like food. I know about nutrition. I have a different excuse for every hour of the day. I have a pretty good insight into why I am fat. That doesn't stop me being fat.

See. Excuses.

JakeBullet Tue 23-Apr-13 08:52:30

...and we are starting a new Bootcamp here if you are interested. Starting on the 29th April I think. Two weeks of Bootcamp then introduce some me you will feel fabulous afterwards.

AtYourCervix Tue 23-Apr-13 08:53:42

I like carbs. With a hefty dose of cheese.

Low carb is quite hard if you don't like meat.

JakeBullet Tue 23-Apr-13 08:54:03

Actually you are fit and tbh that is worth a huge amount. Fitness counts more when looking at causes of illness and health. Thin unfit people die quicker than fat people who are fit.

Maybe it's self esteem and body image that's an issue.

matchpoint Tue 23-Apr-13 08:55:49

Please don't listen to the poster saying that they aren't 'really that big an operation.' My friend had one. She had complications post-op which involved being fed through a tube in her nose directly into her intestines for several months. Her family also continued to eat crap food around her, which was very hard for her. She looks very good now (several years later), but when I asked if she'd do it again, she said no.

If you do decide to go ahead with the procedure, you must follow your doctor's advice to the T. Can you do that?

AtYourCervix Tue 23-Apr-13 08:57:52

I can't do it really. I haven't the £££ and am far too chicken.
Just a bit disparing.
I will relook at low carbing.

AtYourCervix Tue 23-Apr-13 08:58:52

Self esteem? What's that?
And I know my body image. It's disgusting.

see? Issues. Huge ones

drfayray Tue 23-Apr-13 09:07:26

About a year (and a bit) ago, I was a size 20 - my weight went up and down and up and down: bloody yoyo me sad.

Then my ex left us. And I wanted to make changes; had tried all sorts of programs but they were always no good. Worked for a bit then it all came back.

So I decided to work at it myself. I changed my attitude to food. It was about fuel; not pleasure. And I started to exercise. Every single day I did something. I set myself challenges. What also helps is that I do not drink nor like cheese!

Now I am a size 12/14 and look amazing (see my pix; I have a before and after as well).

I still have to be on the ball. The key is exercise; I run and dance. I also make sure that I eat well and no crap as that is not good for my body. Attitude change i guess. I knew what I had to do but actually doing to be a habit.

Not wanting to sound preachy but I think a gastric band is too dangerous and need to work on why you want to change...if you do that is..

And I adore dressing up and looking great. Off to tango class now!

Good luck with everything!

uggmum Tue 23-Apr-13 09:15:10

I don't have first hand experience of this but I have a close friend who had a gastric bypass. My friend was addicted to food, always eating the wrong types of food and her weight rose to 25 stone.

She had a bypass 15 mths ago and has lost 13 stone since then. She looks and feels amazing. Her whole attitude to food has changed and she longer craves the foods that she used to eat. To be honest she struggles to eat full stop. But she says she is a lot happier than before.

CocacolaMum Tue 23-Apr-13 09:20:37

Try its completely free. You can track your eating habits and log exercise - post in the welcome forum and you will get lots of friends to offer support x

Lucyellensmum95 Tue 23-Apr-13 09:20:49

Maybe spend the £££s on some counselling - please don't say those things about yourself, i find it really upsetting sad

There are millions upon millions of pounds made by fad diets and bloody fucking weight watchers and slimming world - all of them promoting quick fix solutions. Solutions to what?? Being what society expects us to be. I am not saying that we shouldn't eat healthily but NO, you wont be happier if you are stick thin - You wont suddenly have an idyllic life if only you can shed those last few pounds. I HATE the way that they are using "celebreties" on the WW adverts just now - its like "look, you can be like me - i was oooh, half a stone over my ideal underweight size but thanks to weight watchers I have lost the weight and become my former amazing self with the amazing life and loads of £££ friends and everythings wonderful" FUCK OFF!!!!! These adverts are there to make us feel bad about ourselves - its like, fuck me, if patsy kensit was that worried about being half a stone over weight i must be a fucking hippo and i'll never be happy unless i get my credit card out right now this minute - oh and these companies do really well because its unsustainable, so the weight goes back on, you sign up again...........and so it goes on.

STOP dieting - starting eating healthy food i will if you will! but if you want a tub of ben and jerries, fucking have it!! Just make sure that your main meals are healthy - the craving for the shit should stop.

JakeBullet Tue 23-Apr-13 09:22:06

"Carbs...with a hefty dose of cheese" grin. Yep me too lol but it's an occasional treat now.

Yes I have heard that LC if you are not a meat eater is hard.

Quodlibet Tue 23-Apr-13 09:23:03

OP it seems like you know there's an underlying psychological issue at work here which gastric bands aren't going to fix. Have you looked into any psych support? CBT or counselling to address your self-esteem and food issues? It seems like you know that unless you tackle the root causes (which must be very daunting) you'll just go round in circles. Don't dismiss CBT because you 'know' what your problems are - you still need support to construct different thought patterns to enable behavioural change.

JakeBullet Tue 23-Apr-13 09:23:37

In Sweden WW have been in trouble for using a woman in an advert who actually lost her weight in a health resort on a 500 cal a day diet. NOT on the WW diet as they claimed. hmm

I really recommend and her book taking up space

It's a really helpful approach for people overcoming difficult/disordered relationships with food and eating/dieting.

There's a facebook group too, which is great for support/advice on the road to recovery. It's interesting how the issues and feelings are very similar in very slim women and very fat women. A bad relationship with your body and with food is not cured by losing weight. But it can be cured!

I'm feeling much much better about myself. I'm much fitter and healthier (and slightly thinner), and it's much easier to take the 'right' decisions because I feel like I'm worth looking after.

Good luck.

You could try Slim & Save. Its meal replacement packs, low carb. I don't like meat, and its the only low carb option I could find.

You can do 3/4 packs (milkshakes, bars, soups, meals) a day, plus low carb veg. You order a weeks supply at a time online. You lose about a stone a month- although I understand it dosen't address your food issue, some time away from cooking/kitchen/bingeing can be helpful?

CarpeVinum Tue 23-Apr-13 09:43:29

I think it might be worth checking to see if there is a UK version of something like this.

With such a concentrated array of experience, pre and post op you might get a feel for what your outcome would be like, depending on whose circumstances you relate to best.

It would also highlight any lesser known issues that might be of particular concern to you.

It also appears to offer community for support post op aimed at avpiding pitfalls that lead to regain or wieght.

I just don't think you are going to quite the array of experience and knowledge here that you would get in a topic specific community.

A friend of ours had it done. He lost a lot of wieght, but there were some post op issues that caused him to have to have quite a lot of medical intervention afterwards. He is regaining the wieght. I think possibly he was unprepared for all eventualities, so it was a hell of a shcok for him, and I think he needs life post op input from people in the same boat to challenge some of the stratagies he is inventing that seem to be sabotuaging longer term success.

Whichever forum you pick, make sure it is one that doesn't ban or dogpile people who relate less postivie experiences. If everything looks too rosy, maybe skip that one and see if you can find something with a more rounded range of experiences.

FeijoaVodkaStat Tue 23-Apr-13 09:43:31

Maybe you just don't want to change.

No matter what weight loss route you choose it isn't going to work if your heart isn't in it.

So for now you are active and fit which is good, but until you are in the right head space to change your eating habits, you will stay overweight and fit.

BigFatSpider Tue 23-Apr-13 09:49:54

"I have tried WW. SW. Pills. Veganism. Bullimia. 5:2. Atkins. Low carb. Low fat. Low calorie. I am active. I walk. I go to the gym. I am genetically lazy and greedy. I like food. I know about nutrition. I have a different excuse for every hour of the day. I have a pretty good insight into why I am fat. That doesn't stop me being fat."

Hey smile

I am you. Or rather (oh god, here comes the diet bore) - I was you. I had tried everything and cried myself to sleep most nights, woken with the same 'oh christ I'm still fat and I hate myself' feeling in the pit of my (hungry) stomach, but still employed the same excuses over and over. I'm exercise-induced asthmatic. I have MS and often can't feel my legs and get tired very quickly. I haven't got time what with working and family. Eating carbs'n'shit is my only pleasure. Yada yada yada.

I eventually hit 16.11 last August, barely squeezing myself into a 22 at 5 foot 4. Not pretty, and I suspect I was heading for gastic band surgery within a year or so - I could quite easily see how out of control I was (including purging on and off for years) but couldn't do a damn thing about it.

What has worked for me is Orlistat. It's hardcore - but for me, it's the fact that when I take them, I simply can't eat carbs'n'shit - it's the simplest equation that even I, with my myriad of excuses and 'oh only one won't hurt, go on then' can't get away from. Take a tablet with 3 meals a day, don't eat crap between meals, and stay away from too much fat. I avoid things that are more than 5g fat per 100g to be on the safe side. I love the simplicity of it - if I eat what I've learned is sensibly, I lose weight. If I eat shit, I shit orange oil. It's like post-partum sneezing/bladder weakness - you really don't want to fart in public if you've been eating the wrong thing.

Pretty graphic, I know - but for me, it was just that fact that I couldn't cheat - or rather that if I did, more fool me. Of course I eat 'bad' stuff every now and again - but it's the every now and again bit that's now beginning to get under control. Every now and again is acceptable for life and won't upset my innards unduly. Eating a whole block of Caerphilly with 6 pieces of toast because I want to, goddammit, will.

If you like, I can tell you how much I've lost so far, what size I am and how I feel - but I found there was nothing worse than partly-reformed fatties telling me breezily 'oh, if I can do it, anyone can'. But... that's where I am now.

Hope this makes sense - an awful ramble and my work PC is still on Explorer v.6 so I can only see 6 words at a time...

Have a think about Orlistat - GP prescription only. I'm on a 3 month supply and get weighed at the surgery before they'll give me more. I never, ever thought I'd see myself - or that others would see me - as anything other than 'pretty face, shame about the rest of her'.

AtYourCervix Tue 23-Apr-13 10:11:16

I think I need counselling from samantha brick. She'd sort me out.

Add MyFitnessPal and Orlistat into my list of tried and failds.

Need to untwist my psyche.

Lucyellensmum95 Tue 23-Apr-13 10:17:02

Samantha brick is a shallow egotistical cunt - she would simply take delight in making you feel shit about yourself so she can feel good about herself and move on

<awaits deletion>

AtYourCervix Tue 23-Apr-13 10:24:29


I sort of know how you feel although I haven't considered gastric band. I have tried most diets. Lost 33lbs with WW last year but since around sept have been gaining and losing the same few pounds and feeling like an utter failure.

I met a girl on saturday who is just joining WW. She had done SW for years but not really got anywhere. So tried the Cambridge diet. Has lost over 2 and a half stone but knows she can't carry on with it so she is now starting WW to lose her final two stone.

It made me think about mixing things up a bit. I thought about Cambridge or something similar but not sure I could stick to that for long.

I am bored with WW. I feel like a failure when I see people who have managed to stick to it like I think I should have. So I have decided I need a change. The good thing is that I haven't put back on all I lost last year as I have kept going to WW. So I now want to lose another 2 stone and I am joining the low carb boot camp. I'm wondering if a change will be as good as a rest ifywim? I'll me more enthusiastic and interested in something new. And if after a few months on this I am feeling bored again I may switch to another approach. I think sticking to one plan if you have a lot to lose can seem so daunting and seems to stretch into forever.

I think you just haven't found the way that works for you yet. I'm loving 5:2 as I get to eat carbs with a chunk of cheese the vast majority of the time.

What is it about the 2 day fast that's difficult for you? Have you tried cutting down gradually on those 2 days? I know someone who was at 900 calories for a few weeks and it took her over 2 months to get down to 500. She is now happily losing at a pound a week.

For me every single 'diet' has been utterly unsustainable apart from 5:2.

frumperina Tue 23-Apr-13 10:41:16

I would recommend trying the Hypnotic Gastric Band, I did the Paul Mckenna one and lost 5kg in 2 weeks with no effort what so ever.It was so easy. then I found out I was pregnant. It did not work for me when I had morning sickness and weird food cravings,but I'm through the first trimester now and feeling better so will try again. Just ordered one for my mum too.
I work with people who have had Gastric Bands and Bypasses sometimes and they are not a magic solution at all, especially if you don't deal with the psychological causes of over-eating.

recall Tue 23-Apr-13 10:41:43

atyourcervix can I just say that if you are considering a weight loss surgery, please think about having a gastric bypass instead. I had a gastric band, and I lost 6 stone, but then my pouch above the band stretched, and I put 5 stone back on.

I then had revision surgery, and had the bypass. I can't recommend this surgery enough. My whole attitude to food has changed. My appetite has greatly reduced, and I don't eat for pleasure/comfort any more. I only need to eat a small meal, and I feel satisfied and just stop eating. If I eat too much fatty/sugary foods,I feel quite nauseous and tired, so naturally avoid them. If I eat a balanced meal, with plenty of protein, a small amount go carbs, and salad/veg I feel just right. I now share puddings because one is far too much. About 4 squares of chocolate is my limit now or I spend the next 40 minutes feeling bleurgh.

I have regained control of what I eat, and more importantly the desire to eat. The compulsion to eat has gone, and I find myself making choices. For example, if i am preparing a meal, I am careful about testing it because even that can knock my appetite off. I don't eat too many carbs now, because it is a waste of my small appetite, I just see it as filler now. I would rather eat the tasty bits. I will buy a sandwich, and remove half of the bread, and make it into one triangle. Sometimes, I get to 2-3 pm and suddenly realise I haven't eaten because I feel tired, that would have been unheard of pre bypass.

The surgery itself only takes about 10 more minutes than the band, it is laparoscopic, and it is also fully reversible, no part of your anatomy is removed, just adjusted. I found that the recovery was quicker too.

And the best part is that I have lost 3.5 stone since the surgery, and still losing it slowly. Food is now about nutrition, and is no longer an addiction.

specialsubject Tue 23-Apr-13 10:44:53

If you want to pay for medical treatment, spend on the psychiatric and other help which is what you actually need. Your problem is in your head, not your stomach - there's no shame in that but please get the right body part treated.

a gastric band is not a cure. You eat soup for the rest of your life, or you keep eating, throw up and eventually burst the band and are back to square one.

Babyroobs Tue 23-Apr-13 10:51:16

My weight issues sound similar to yours. I am a size 20 and feel disgusted with myself. However I would never have a gastric band, I've known someone who had complications following gastric band surgery and can now only be tube fed. I'm not prepared to risk it but that's just my personal opinion. I ahve just bought the paul Mckenna hypnotic gastric band book and will try that .

MansView Tue 23-Apr-13 12:13:58

yes, having a band won't solve your issue - you'll need to get the relevant support afterwards...

Iwishitwouldgetwarmer Tue 23-Apr-13 14:05:09

I've just ordered the Paul Mckenna Gastric Bypass book from Amazon as I've heard some good things about it. Here's the link:

bollockstoit Tue 23-Apr-13 14:36:57

Do you binge op? If so, this blog is worth a look, it has helped me.

emsyj Tue 23-Apr-13 18:45:30

For the poster who asked me to link to the Paul McKenna thing, a couple of folk have already posted links to the book on Amazon but here are the Mumsnet threads about his methods:

I Can Make You Thin thread

Hypnotic Gastric Band thread

Samu2 Tue 23-Apr-13 19:24:40

I haven't had hyno for a gastric band but I have had it for severe health anxiety and I can honestly say that it is changing my life.

Don't dismiss it, try it first smile

Samu2 Tue 23-Apr-13 19:26:49

My hypnotherapist charges £145 for three sessions for the gastric band.

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