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To think it is incorrect to refer to zombies as dead

(74 Posts)
Lucyellensmum95 Sat 20-Apr-13 22:14:47

They are clearly not dead! They are moving, breathing, they respond, need to feed etc - they are not dead are they???

NumTumDeDum Sat 20-Apr-13 22:15:55

Why, has a zombie complained to you about this?

deleted203 Sat 20-Apr-13 22:16:18

I thought they were 'the living dead'...

MadCap Sat 20-Apr-13 22:16:34

They're living challenged or partially living grin

Beehatch Sat 20-Apr-13 22:16:59

They are Undead clearly

Do they....poo? Because they need to excrete to be a living thing apparently.

Don't judge them to harshly, you can tell by just looking at them that they have ishoos

ShadowStorm Sat 20-Apr-13 22:19:01

Reanimated?

Lucyellensmum95 Sat 20-Apr-13 22:19:21

no no, they have just been referred to as dead on the film that DPis making me watch IN THE DARK!! ffs I just think that to describe them as corpses is wrong and the fact taht they can function (albeit at a basic level) with servere injuries should be treated as a potential wealth of possibilities in terms of medical research. Also, is it morally acceptable to kill them even more, unless of course they pose an iminent threat to "life"

MinnieBar Sat 20-Apr-13 22:20:01

Have you watched 'In The Flesh'? In that they are described as having 'partially deceased syndrome' grin

floatyfloni Sat 20-Apr-13 22:20:04

Ooh how very PC grin

Lucyellensmum95 Sat 20-Apr-13 22:20:45

I don;t knkow - do they poo??

NumTumDeDum Sat 20-Apr-13 22:21:32

Are you watching Cockneys vs Zombies?

SprinkleLiberally Sat 20-Apr-13 22:22:20

Why is not a zomby? And several zombies? Irritates me daily I tell you.

cornydash Sat 20-Apr-13 22:23:21

they are the walking dead

NumTumDeDum Sat 20-Apr-13 22:25:23

What would be in a Zombie Bill Of Rights?

Lucyellensmum95 Sat 20-Apr-13 22:25:47

also, how do they know who is a zombie and who isn't? why don't they eat each other? I have often wondered this

FranKatzenjammer Sat 20-Apr-13 22:26:49

In the Zombie Survival Guide, it says a zombie doesn't have an active digestive system. The human flesh it ingests just builds up until it gets pushed out of its bumhole.

NumTumDeDum Sat 20-Apr-13 22:26:59

And now Sprinkledaily, it will irritate me too. Why have I not noticed that anomaly before?

Surely it's incorrect to refer to them as anything but 'fictitious' or maybe 'imaginary'

Lucyellensmum95 Sat 20-Apr-13 22:27:22

The right to eat arms??

RhondaJean Sat 20-Apr-13 22:27:42

I imagine they smell off, rotting flesh n all. Not appetising.

Off to google do zombies poo...

kim147 Sat 20-Apr-13 22:27:44

Do they reproduce?

GreenPeppercorn Sat 20-Apr-13 22:28:29

I think they are "re-animated corpses" aren't they? Cuts out all the unnecessary PC zombie bullshit about their alive or unalive status. Eating brians may or may not cause poo.

They are alternatively alive.

deleted203 Sat 20-Apr-13 22:29:15

I believe if we are to be politically correct about this that the correct term is now ''The Corporeal Bereft of Life"...anything else is just rude.

NumTumDeDum Sat 20-Apr-13 22:29:30

Sprinkleliberally. Not daily. Well I guess it depends what you are sprinkling. Anyway, I digress. I think the key here is that they are no longer human and become 'other' and thus dead.

GreenPeppercorn Sat 20-Apr-13 22:29:47

Brains not brians! Although that isn't to say that the re-animated are not able to eat Brians. Anyone can eat a Brian.

Lucyellensmum95 Sat 20-Apr-13 22:29:58

i don't know kim, but then if they don't die, do they need to? but yes, reproduction is a criteria of life.

NumTumDeDum Sat 20-Apr-13 22:30:46

Brian may not want to eat Brian. Or have anyone else eat him for that matter.

GreenPeppercorn Sat 20-Apr-13 22:31:44

They don't need to reproduce because they just have to bite a member of the non-dead community in order to produce another member of their alternative community. FGS people have some compassion.

If it's Brian from the Yoni thread, eating's too good for him.

MacaYoniAndCheese Sat 20-Apr-13 22:32:12

They are dead...but not in the traditional sense?

GreenPeppercorn Sat 20-Apr-13 22:32:16

Typical MN. Now they start on the Brians....

GreenPeppercorn Sat 20-Apr-13 22:33:05

I wonder if Brian attends to the yoni (plural?) of the re-animated community?

Lucyellensmum95 Sat 20-Apr-13 22:33:27

I can't imagine that a zombie has the dexterity for yoni massage

ZOmbie yoni massage with brian. shock

someone pass me the brian bleach

SprinkleLiberally Sat 20-Apr-13 22:35:02

Well. They have definitely been previously dead, hence their unusual status. But they are now alive. So, "the creatures formerly known as dead" is both snappy and factual.

*BRAIN bleach ffs brian, brian why is brian on my brain, feckin zombies they've learnt mind control

MrsDeVere Sat 20-Apr-13 22:35:48

I think you will find the correct term is 'living impaired'

MrsDeVere Sat 20-Apr-13 22:38:32

It is also a spectrum. No two zombie are the same. They are not just some homogeneous lump you know!

And please don't refer to them as 'The Zombies'. It just rude.

They are more than just their mortality you know!

Iaintdunnuffink Sat 20-Apr-13 22:38:44

Why do you all feel the need to label them sad

Lucyellensmum95 Sat 20-Apr-13 22:39:45

but have they really been previously dead? wasn't there a disease in papua new guinea that resulted in people being buried alive because they appeared to be dead? WAsn't this where the zombie myth started? I think its called Kuru, its a prion disease like CJD and BSE and was actually thought to be passed on via cannibalism.

SprinkleLiberally Sat 20-Apr-13 22:42:06

Oh yes. I saw it on The Walking Dead. Actual brain activity stopped for hours. And Egg from This Life said it.

GreenPeppercorn Sat 20-Apr-13 22:42:25

I really think people need to listen up here. If it wasn't for the OP I would have had no idea how to repel distasteful haribo munching plebs on the bus with the handy placement of a bag. This woman knows her onions.

GreenPeppercorn Sat 20-Apr-13 22:43:46

Speaking of cannibalism, as we clearly were, is feeding left over egg sandwich to the birds in fact encouraging cannibalism? One does wonder.

HoneyDragon Sat 20-Apr-13 22:44:12

They are Differently Dead.

I'm not labelling them. One of my most favourite Mnetters is a zombie [wink[

HoneyDragon Sat 20-Apr-13 22:44:26

Or wink even

UnexpectedItemInShaggingArea Sat 20-Apr-13 22:45:35

Zombies have feelings too y'know. sad

IamtheZombie Sat 20-Apr-13 22:45:50

hmm shock

Zombie is NOT dead. Nor is she "ficticious" or "imaginary". Her Yoni has had bits cut out of it this week but is otherwise in fine fettle - or will be once her cervix has healed.

Lucyellensmum95 Sat 20-Apr-13 22:46:59

yes but greenpeppercorn - it didn't work! So selective bag placement is not part of my zombie plan!

Lucyellensmum95 Sat 20-Apr-13 22:48:53

grin I am glad that THE Zombie is feeling better - and i hope your yoni is feeling happy and harmonious really soon! x

GreenPeppercorn Sat 20-Apr-13 22:52:59

Hey it worked for me. Bus home that night, absolutely full of undesirables. I put my bag on the seat next to me and lo and behold, none of the dirty barstards sat next to me. I was free to smoke and fart and swear loudly down the 'phone to my bff for the entire journey. Job done wink

Lucyellensmum95 Sat 20-Apr-13 22:55:00

I think it was the farting and smoking that did it to be honest GP

gordyslovesheep Sat 20-Apr-13 22:55:27

they are the once alive - or the PC term is 'people of none living status'

technically they are dead as their organs and circulatory system has shut down (no heart beat etc) but their is minimal brain activity

unless they are 'infected' so not technically zombies in the old school sense ...those bastards can RUN

GreenPeppercorn Sat 20-Apr-13 22:58:16

Did you mean to be so rude you utter cunt? grin

EmpressOfThe7OceansLovesMN Sat 20-Apr-13 22:59:37

<waves to Honeydragon>
Zombie is one of my most favourite Mumsnetters too. Zombies have a right to (un)life, just like everyone else.

Lucyellensmum95 Sat 20-Apr-13 23:00:12

shock I bet you have a Juicy couture bag, or a pauls boutique sack, go on, admit it..........

GreenPeppercorn Sat 20-Apr-13 23:03:46

To be honest it surprises me very little that you would think that.

It was a highly fashionably "JD Sports" school pe style bag which I wear around my shoulder in a postman/woman/whatever stylee. Keep up wont you.

GreenPeppercorn Sat 20-Apr-13 23:04:09

I keep a Next bag with good handles for best. I thank you.

Lucyellensmum95 Sat 20-Apr-13 23:08:40

I suppose it would give good leverage if you had to use it to beat off approaching zombies

GreenPeppercorn Sat 20-Apr-13 23:12:06

Clearly you are a beginner. You beat zombies off with a good quality sainsbos canvas bag full of gin bottled water.

gordyslovesheep Sat 20-Apr-13 23:13:33

why beat them off?? ...JOIN US JOIN US ...mmmmm Brains

GreenPeppercorn Sat 20-Apr-13 23:18:12

See i'm clearly brainwashed and i've only had 5 2 g&ts and I still read that as Brians...

Lucyellensmum95 Sat 20-Apr-13 23:22:18

I don't need a bag, ive had half a bottle of retsina (greek wine) i can just set light to my breath and i'll have a flame thrower - um, GP can i borrow your lighter?

(((((Zombie'sYoni))))) Now, if that isn't a Mumsnetty hug, I don't know what is. Healing thoughts to you IamtheZombie

gordyslovesheep Sat 20-Apr-13 23:30:55

I have had 3 large wines ...I typed it as Brians ...which is funny if you think about it ...I am a zombie who likes men called Brian grin hick

GreenPeppercorn Sat 20-Apr-13 23:50:16

FGS lucy i can't afford lighters, have a match and be grateful you bloody wank badger.

Lucyellensmum95 Sat 20-Apr-13 23:51:41

Can I light it on your chin stubble??

GreenPeppercorn Sat 20-Apr-13 23:59:03

You know I shaved last night ffs, you cleaned the razor.

sashh Sun 21-Apr-13 04:32:40

also, how do they know who is a zombie and who isn't? why don't they eat each other? I have often wondered this

Smell, if you cover yourself in rotting zombie flesh you can pass the undead.

Better still catch a couple, chop of their jaws so they can't eat and their arms so they can't do any damage, put on a chain and the zombies won't smell you.

Bearandcub Sun 21-Apr-13 04:45:08

Aren't they the undead?

sashh have you seen Shaun of the Dead. Just act undead, they will never know.

Lucyellensmum95 Sun 21-Apr-13 21:52:40

Shaun of the Dead is on now on itv2 - i am watching closely for hints of life/death

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