to think you can't just crap in the street!!

(309 Posts)
RescueCack Thu 18-Apr-13 07:25:04

DH has just come back from a run and sheepishly told me that he took a dump in a bush. Again. This is not the first time. It doesn't happen regularly, but it has happened. How can he think this is ok??

He says he has no choice. I asked him, if he was surrounded by people watching him he would have held it, and he said 'yes, but I would have had to end my run'. So finishing a run is more important than not crapping in public???

He asked me to post because he thinks he will be validated. I know he wont. There is no way this is normal or ok. Judge him hard.

RescueCack Thu 18-Apr-13 07:25:36

Oh, and I'm not the poo troll. I just name changed so the shame of this doesn't trail me around...

Sparklingbrook Thu 18-Apr-13 07:26:50

Did he pick it up and bag it?

Smudging Thu 18-Apr-13 07:27:19

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

lucidlady Thu 18-Apr-13 07:27:41

That is gross. I'm sure it's illegal.

Euphemia Thu 18-Apr-13 07:27:42

That's vile! I could understand getting caught short if you've had a stomach bug, or have IBS, but he's making a habit of it!


MissSusan Thu 18-Apr-13 07:28:02

What did he wipe with ?

chrome100 Thu 18-Apr-13 07:28:07

OK, I'm afraid I'm with your DH. I am a runner and have done this a few times. When you have to go, you have to go. Probably TMI but meh...

RescueCack Thu 18-Apr-13 07:28:13

No, he didn't bag it either. He didn't carry a baggy for himself...

RescueCack Thu 18-Apr-13 07:28:46

He wiped with his sweat band and binned it <dies of shame some more>

AnyFucker Thu 18-Apr-13 07:28:53

Dirty fucking bastard

What the hell is wrong with him ?

RescueCack Thu 18-Apr-13 07:29:41

Well, he's not making a "habit" of it. As far as I know, it's happened 3 times including this one since I've known him. Which is 15 years.

He didn't crap in the street though did he?

He crapped in a bush/ in the woods like normal runners right???

ImTooHecsyForYourParty Thu 18-Apr-13 07:30:15

Why couldn't he just end his run?

I'm with you. I think it's revolting

BlackeyedSusan Thu 18-Apr-13 07:30:38

with any fucker on that. disgusting.

RescueCack Thu 18-Apr-13 07:30:47

Chrome posts like yours are what I was afraid of. He says runners will understand, non-runners wont.

5318008 Thu 18-Apr-13 07:31:16

That is disgusting

Defecating in public, beyond the pale

Sparklingbrook Thu 18-Apr-13 07:31:25

You need to send him out with Washlets and a poo bag next time.

Dawndonna Thu 18-Apr-13 07:31:40

What is he, a three year old?

HollyBerryBush Thu 18-Apr-13 07:31:47

Tell him to get up earlier and crap before he leaves the house

RescueCack Thu 18-Apr-13 07:32:08

He says it was off the main road, no-one could see.

Sparklingbrook Thu 18-Apr-13 07:32:27

Doesn't running make you need a poo though?

There's no reason to crap in an actual street - if you're running on streets and don't have a medical condition you run to a public toilet.

If like my dh you're running 5 miles from town in the woods and fields you shit in a field.

Methinks your dh thinks he's Paula fucking Radcliffe wink

CSIJanner Thu 18-Apr-13 07:33:23

YANBU - a gent in Malvern wrote to his local bin depot demanding £1500 compensation as the binmen were doing their business on his driveway - long rural route, no facilities, even brought their own toiler paper.

He should have at least bagged it.

BallerinaZeena Thu 18-Apr-13 07:34:08

Revolting. YANBU

Montybojangles Thu 18-Apr-13 07:34:20

What would he think if he saw someone let their dog crap out on the street/park and then just leave it there without bagging and binning it?

Does he think it's alright as he did it in a bush? Kids play all over the place, they don't want to be having to avoid crap.

he's a filthy git, and he knows it really, or he wouldn't have been admitting what he did sheepishly would he.

CSIJanner Thu 18-Apr-13 07:34:42

Sorry! His run wasn't rural? Yuck! Then there was no excuse not t run to the nearest loo.

Sparklingbrook Thu 18-Apr-13 07:34:47

I remember reading that CSI, Especially the 'it left a stain' bit. confused

Wow that is grim. I have IBS but even if sweating, shaking and ready to pass out, I have always managed to drag myself to a toilet. As soon as you know it is getting desperate you drop everything to search out a toilet.

FoulOleRon Thu 18-Apr-13 07:35:52

It's revolting and unsanitary. I pick up my dogs poo, why doesn't he pick up his?

It happens quite a bit round our way - I now know the difference between human and dog poo as my dog will eat human poo (vile vile stinky habit) but not dog poo.

There is no excuse.

Yonihadtoask Thu 18-Apr-13 07:37:07

Hmmm... If he was just squatting on the pavement outside someone's house then YANBU.

However, if he was away from the roads and it was in a secluded spot - and no one was going to step in it then YABU.

I run - and all that jiggling around does get things moving in the bowel area. However, I tend to cut short my runs if I feel I can't hold it in much longer. I am not so dedicated grin

RescueCack Thu 18-Apr-13 07:40:04

The thing is, I do know other runners who have done the same. Why can't they just not push them selves to that point? Obviously you've gone beyond your capacity as an athlete if you get uncontrollable diarrhoea so why did you do it to yourself??

FoulOleRon I think if he had pre-empted it he would have made sure he could clean it up. But obviously it wasn't part of his plan. He did go before leaving the house as well.

I guess I can't get my head around working out so hard this happens. Very odd.


ihearsounds Thu 18-Apr-13 07:43:47

Search runners diarrhea, you will find that at times even the pro's just have to go.

KatyTheCleaningLady Thu 18-Apr-13 07:44:33

Paula Radcliffe has done this in front of spectators and cameras.

If it was truly in a place where nobody will see it, smell it, or step in it, I don't see the problem.

RescueCack Thu 18-Apr-13 07:45:15

I thought Paula had weed. Now I'm a bit hmm about her as well.

Yonihadtoask Thu 18-Apr-13 07:48:21

I am going for a run later this morning.

Just to let you all know, that I got up especially early - breakfasted etc and have now no need to squat in the street grin ...

RescueCack Thu 18-Apr-13 07:49:10

THank you Yoni we all appreciate your considerate toiletting habits

ChasedByBees Thu 18-Apr-13 07:50:57

That is vile

MarjoryStewartBaxter Thu 18-Apr-13 07:51:49

Paula Radcliffe did a wee in front of the cameras, don't think it was a poo.

I recall someone posting a video of a distance runner rummaging around in his own pants then flinging a poo out onto the side of the road, all without breaking stride. On the bright side at least your DH didn't do this...

That said it is frigging foul however, YANBU.

tulippa Thu 18-Apr-13 07:52:02

One of the hazards of running I'm afraid.

Disclaimer: I have never pooed in the street - on the odd occasion when 'runners trots' have struck me I've always managed to make it home after a very uncomfortable run instead.

Has he tried immodium? A lot of runners use this.

TumbleWeeds Thu 18-Apr-13 08:00:08

I can see how this can happen.

I think it depends what he means by 'needing to go'. Diarrhoea and cramps plus a feeling of urgency, you can't quite control.
Needing to 1/4 of the run in and refusing to turn back is a different issue iyswim.

I don't think you can compare of it to long distance runners in a competition. These people would do anything to win but their situation is hardly comparable to a the Op's DH run.

ShanksYoni Thu 18-Apr-13 08:00:50

Well, I've just added another reason to my list of why I don't want to take up running.

cheeseandpineapple Thu 18-Apr-13 08:01:09

Good grief, had no idea this could be a running side effect. Bad enough to do it but to tell you, he must realise that despite your best efforts you can't help but visualise.

In fact, I can't help it now and to use a soggy sweaty head band... trying not to vomit in my mouth...

imour Thu 18-Apr-13 08:01:15

if he had the squirts and couldnt hold fair enough , but for him to say he could of held on and do it anyway is just gross and what did he wipe with ? , hopefully he will get arrested for lurking in bushes next time smile

AlistairSim Thu 18-Apr-13 08:04:34

As if I needed another reason not to take up running.

"I can't possibly go running, I may shit myself, sorry"

cheeseandpineapple Thu 18-Apr-13 08:05:52

Agree with Tumble. Difference between taking a dump and diarrhoea. I travelled with a friend who had dysentery and had to run into some bushes while we were in some remote place much to the amusement of some local village boys who spectated. She had absolutely no choice.

Fairylea Thu 18-Apr-13 08:07:04

Absolutely vile. No it's not normal.

And more to the point is he not absolutely embarrassed to be sharing this with you ? Surely shitting in a bush is the kind of thing you'd keep private (or share with mumsnet) if you had absolutely no choice but to go !

Bibs123 Thu 18-Apr-13 08:08:15

He could get himself arrested if someone caught sight of him loitering ina bush and grunting!

Osmiornica Thu 18-Apr-13 08:09:24


So next time I'm on a walk with my children and they're running around off the paths and they step in poo, it could well be your husband's. That is just disgusting and selfish.

DH runs. He's never mentioned having to squat and shit during his runs.

<makes mental note to ask him when he comes home from work>

"hello darling, nice day at work? by the way, do you have to shit in the street when you go out on runs?"

I can just imagine his face. grin

Fenton Thu 18-Apr-13 08:14:01


If a grown man can't organise his run around his bowel movements then he just has to cut short his run.


HotelTangoFoxtrotUniform Thu 18-Apr-13 08:14:59

Paula Radcliffe didn't wee. Had she weed she would have just done it as she ran and not squatted in the gutter.

Runners sometimes get runners trots, but it's not that hard to find a loo - especially if you're in an urban area. Plenty of my running friends run loops close to their house if they haven't pooed before a run as they know that running works things through.

Bertrude Thu 18-Apr-13 08:17:04

In woods / rural areas I can kinda understand it.

In a bush just off a main road, not so much with the understanding.

And yes, I am joining the army on MNers who will be using the potential to shit themselves during a run as a reason for not doing it.

Silverlace Thu 18-Apr-13 08:18:44

As someone who owns bushes that people regularly poo in I think it is totally disgusting, vile, revolting etc etc.

I do not want to walk down my drive and see someone's pooey tissue blowing around as often happens.

Yuck, yuck, yuck.

iwouldgoouttonight Thu 18-Apr-13 08:23:58

I can see both sides of your argument. I run, and 'runners trots' is something that happens to me. I can go to the toilet several times before running and then when I'm a couple of miles from home suddenly get the most painful stomach cramps and have to hobble home in agony. If I did a poo I'd be able to carry on without pain. But I've always been too embarrassed to go in a bush in case someone saw me.

On one occasion I was suddenly desperate to go and tried to make it to the nearest toilet, which was closed. Then I considered knocking on someone's for and asking to use their toilet, but thought they'd think I was a weirdo. And then eventually I couldn't hold it in any longer and I had to limp home with a big poo in my pants.

It was one of the worst experiences of my life! And in hindsight I should have probably named changed before telling you all that blush

cardamomginger Thu 18-Apr-13 08:24:41

YANBU. And I am a runner. What he (and anyone else who feels the urge to do this) needs to do is to make sure that they are near a toilet at that part of the run when this tends to happen. Even if that means that he does a loop and ends up back at home. Then he can do his poo before heading off for the rest of his run. Just takes a bit of sensible route planning!

iwouldgoouttonight Thu 18-Apr-13 08:26:06

Although I wouldn't do it myself I don't think shitting in a bush is any worse that the people who don't pick up their dog mess. That's often in the middle of the pavement.

ObiWankenYoni Thu 18-Apr-13 08:26:25

My ex used to do this

Dirty fucking bastard

Doyouthinktheysaurus Thu 18-Apr-13 08:35:32

I run and I understand, it's a running thing. Runners trots, it's a common problem. Not pooing in bushes, I don't advocate that although I have had to do it once but digestive urgency is common among runners.

It is nothing to do with pushing yourself, sometimes there is no rhyme or reason, running long distance does odd things to your digestion.

I eat the same stuff before every run but a couple of times I have had urgency. I have had to take detours to find loo's, but it is harder to find one now as many round here have been shut.

I had to take copious doses of Imodium before I ran my marathon, I didn't go for a week after thatgrin

Fairylea Thu 18-Apr-13 08:50:12

I hope there's lots of bushes on the marathon route !

eccentrica Thu 18-Apr-13 08:51:09

Hmm, It's almost as if humans aren't designed for running long distances for no reason...

Thank God for zumba ;)

Oh and Paula R definitely pooed. So did Gary lineker on the pitch once, but I'm on my phone so can't send link.

ItsAllGoingToBeFine Thu 18-Apr-13 08:53:11

It's minging yes. But the choice is that, or shitting yourself.

Sometimes it just happens, nowt to do with pushing yourself too hard.

Samu2 Thu 18-Apr-13 08:53:23

Perhaps running is my cure for constipation hmm

Fairylea Thu 18-Apr-13 08:53:51 Ewwwww

Fairylea Thu 18-Apr-13 08:54:04
Step Thu 18-Apr-13 09:02:34

Go hang out with triathletes...

Peeing on the bike, pooing in bushes, pooing in their shorts... all regular dinner conversation.
Got to be better tha this:

HousewifeFromHeaven Thu 18-Apr-13 09:06:57

Gosh I've been calling Paula Radcliffe poola radcliffe for ages!

Sorry poola Paula grin

fuzzypicklehead Thu 18-Apr-13 09:09:24

It ain't pretty, but it is a common hazard of long distance running. A couple of tissues and a bag should be a standard part of the kit.

Maybe buy him a bum bag filled with a mini tissue pack and a carrier bag for his next trip out?

LifeIsBetterInFlipFlops Thu 18-Apr-13 09:17:13

'bum bag' <snigger>

MoreBeta Thu 18-Apr-13 09:24:51

RescueCack - but why did your DH even tell you?

There are certain things in life that a man and his wife really don't need to share.

CocktailQueen Thu 18-Apr-13 09:28:33

Yuk. Absolutely revolting.

500internalerror Thu 18-Apr-13 09:29:40

I totally understand this, as an ex runner. However, I do not understand why he couldn't be prepared & just tuck a poo bag into his waistband just in case. Even in a bush it's grim - that's exactly the kind of place kids love exploring. If he's such an ardent runner, he should foresee the possible need for a poo bag!

Sokmonsta Thu 18-Apr-13 09:31:43

I guess as long as he clears up after himself it's no different to a dog doing their business.

But to know it could happen, not go prepared and then to leave it, is not on. I hope he at least buried it.

LadyBeagleEyes Thu 18-Apr-13 09:32:58

Surely that proves that running can't be that good for you if you can't control your bowel movements.
And what about all those long distance runners like in the Olympics?
Are they all pooing their pants?
I think adult nappies are the way forward here.

almapudden Thu 18-Apr-13 09:33:40

A friend of a friend (honestly!) has been known to do this. I've always made it to a loo myself, but it's been a close-run thing lol on occasion.

I am on the fence. Yes, it's gross, but I can understand the need. And to thise freaking out about their children potentially stepping in poo: really, who lets their children play in the bushes on the verge?

Iwouldgoout I'm sure that was horrible for you, but did make me laugh smile

scarletforya Thu 18-Apr-13 09:34:55

Nasty, yuk!

badguider Thu 18-Apr-13 09:35:16

When you run, if you need to go you have to go - it's impossible to hold poo and run. So if you're far from home and need to run back you need to find a toilet or a bush.
I haven't had the problem myself except on my short morning runs when I can get home, but if I did then I would find a toilet if in an urban area and a bush/tree if out in the countryside.
I guess it depends where his poo bush was... by the side of a city street is yuck but deep in a woodland is probably forgivable if a one-off.

Eskino Thu 18-Apr-13 09:35:39

"I'm running" is not an excuse to shit in the street. Even for Paula Radcliffe. It's just disgusting.

He needs to take a bag and some loo roll, problem solved?

badguider Thu 18-Apr-13 09:36:44

Oh, and 3 times in 15 YEARS of regular running hardly indicates he needs to carry poo bags on all his runs... or that he's 'making a habit of it'. hmm

thistlelicker Thu 18-Apr-13 09:37:40

Report him to the police! It's disgusting and a grown adult!! I'd be ashamed of him regardless of how many times its been! Dirty fucker

thistlelicker Thu 18-Apr-13 09:38:06

And to think somebody's as to potentially poppy scoop his shit

ScrambledSmegs Thu 18-Apr-13 09:39:46

I used to run with a club. We were divided on this issue. Most of the older male runners and some of the ultra-competitive runners thought it was fine to dump and leave. The rest of us thought it was vile, but if you really have to, carry a bag to dispose of it.

When I say ultra-competitive I don't mean they were the best runners, by the way hmm

I do hope this is a joke, but if not how absolutely disgusting and disrespectful!!!
Going for a wee is different and isn't comparable to needing a shit, urine is harder to hold in. But ffs shitting is totally witholdable and he could have simply waited until afterwards and go to a lavatory like a decent human would.
Ltb seriously, not even my toddler dc have shit in the street, ever!

thenightsky Thu 18-Apr-13 09:40:15
landofsoapandglory Thu 18-Apr-13 09:41:08


I don't need a reason not to go running, but if I did that would be it!

SoupDragon Thu 18-Apr-13 09:41:12

3 times in 15 YEARS of regular running hardly indicates he needs to carry poo bags on all his runs

Yes it does because he should at least clear it up if it happens. Just like dog owners should.

scarletforya Thu 18-Apr-13 09:41:12

I never realised this was a running 'thing' shock

Running is an even more unpleasant than I thought. I don't get it, what could be so pleasurable that you would think you 'need' to poop in public! shock Just don't run! Get fit near a toilet. Grim!

nenevomito Thu 18-Apr-13 09:42:45

You may want to tell him that my 3yo can manage to hold onto a poo until she gets to a toilet.

How the fuck can he think that shitting in the bushes is OK?

If he's going to do this <pukes> then at least take a baggie and some bog roll so he's not so utterly vile.

landofsoapandglory Thu 18-Apr-13 09:46:02

shock that poor man, thenightsky. Why is he still running, and not somewhere cleaning himself up?

Fakebook Thu 18-Apr-13 09:49:01

Ugh. That is so disgusting, not to mention a health risk to passers by. Male poo is more foul than female poo. Yuck.

Stinkyminkymoo Thu 18-Apr-13 09:51:15

Thanks Nightsky! That's the very image I think of when I hear the words 'runner' and 'poo' in the same sentence, makes me gag!

Idocrazythings Thu 18-Apr-13 09:53:59

I'm a bit of a runner and I understand…. Poor DH. Fortunately it has never happened to me, but I have had to go into one or two pubs just to use the toilets, and also have been seen banging insistently on the front door at home to be let in…

Just a serious question, would you rather he crapped his pants then- it does come on quickly and pain fully?

quoteunquote Thu 18-Apr-13 09:54:23

Campaign for more public toilets?

AgathaF Thu 18-Apr-13 09:56:13

So, was the bush in someone's garden (so the someone might touch it when gardening) or on the verge (so council workers might touch it
when tidying etc)?

Disgusting, he should be ashamed of himself. As others have said, if it's a known problem for runner then they should take a bag and deal with it responsibly.

Women manage to change pads/tampons as required, by making sure that they plan ahead and are near a toilet when they need to be. Can you imagine the outcry if women started dumping used sanitary gear in bushes on the roadside just because they weren't near a toilet?

Your DH is quite right that runners would understand and non-runners wouldn't.

HOWEVER: if he pooped anywhere remotely urban, he should have got in his car as soon as he got home, gone back and cleaned it up.

I've always run in deep woods, and so have just buried myself in deep undergrowth when I've been caught short. I

If I were street running, I'd just stop and walk until I either found a toilet or head home (walking). There's no excuse for pooping where people are nearby.

maddening Thu 18-Apr-13 09:58:18

If you are a runner and often defecate outside - rural or otherwise - take bags with you to take it home.

Even in rural areas - people live there and use those areas too - why should they have to dodge your poo!

And to add, I've always dug a hole and buried it. Deeply!

Bejeena Thu 18-Apr-13 09:59:38

I am a marathon runner and totally understand.

However I will say this in the street it is NOT acceptable. But in a bush or in forest where it will just compost (and actually be good for the soil) then I think it is fine.

There is nothing disgusting about it at all.

thebody Thu 18-Apr-13 10:01:11

Don't run. Problem solved.

Idocrazythings Thu 18-Apr-13 10:01:22

By bush I'm presuming you mean some sort of trail path/embankment area where foxs and squirrels etc live and poo all the time too? And that it is all covered up ready to biodegrade, and not anywhere that someone would step in? unlike a dog poo left in the middle of a playing field or a footpath which people then step in? Like a camping poo?

gordyslovesheep Thu 18-Apr-13 10:03:35

I run and I have IBS

I have NEVER crapped in the street - he is being vile

HeathRobinson Thu 18-Apr-13 10:05:54

So, op, is he going to go back and clear it up?

And if not, why not?

sparechange Thu 18-Apr-13 10:08:32

In defence of runners!
Yes, it happens occasionally (like OP said, 3 times in 15 years for her DH, and about the same for me)
No, you can't predict or plan when it might happen
Yes, it is bloody painful. Not just a 'oh, I think I need a poo' feeling. Really spasm-y stomach cramps like when you have a terrible bug.
If he hid behind a bush, it isn't that bad, and not 'crapping in the street'.
Certainly not as bad as the mum I saw holding her DS over a drain in a supermarket carpark so he could have a crap. It was Sainsburys as well. Oh humanity!

AgathaF Thu 18-Apr-13 10:17:30

sparechange - at least it wasn't Waitrose grin.

sparechange Thu 18-Apr-13 10:32:04

I don't think they have drains in Waitrose carparks.
They have uniformed staff who suck the rainwater away in straws

ConferencePear Thu 18-Apr-13 10:33:04

So he is interested in his own health and too selfish to care about anyone else's ?

sparechange Thu 18-Apr-13 10:35:46

ConferencePear, that is a slight over reaction!
No one is going to die from a cholera outbreak because one bloke has a poo in a bush, where hundreds nay thousands of wild animals will have pooed before him!

ShowOfHands Thu 18-Apr-13 10:36:14

DH is a triathlete and it IS a thing which happens. DH has never done it to my knowledge but when you're on a rural training run and the urge hits, it's impossible to ignore.

You need to hang around with more hardcore triathletes/runners/athletes.

There's a difference between choosing to poo in the street and having an urgent need to go brought on by exercise and there being no facilities available.

My good friend is the fittest person I know, a RAF fitness trainer, triathlete and runner and she cannot go running without it happening, regardless of going before the run starts. She takes stuff with her so she can bag and dispose but she isn't disgusting or abnormal, she's a serious athlete.

Bogeyface Thu 18-Apr-13 10:37:30

If he has to do it then bag it, and 3 times in 15 years isnt a lot but it is enough for him to know that it could happen and be prepared.

Whats his view on people not bagging dog shit?

Why does he not work out a route that passes a public toilet?

Hmmmm, it is a phenomenon known as "runners trots". I'm afraid running for a decent distance does seem to promote that sort of bodily reaction. Yes, I try to go before I run, and no I've never had to resort to poohing in the bushes, and if I was running a 10k race with thousands of others I'd hope I could find a proper facility.

Out in the woods, miles from home, with no-one around? I understand your husband's actions. It's just fertiliser, really, isn't it?

Bogeyface Thu 18-Apr-13 10:38:21

I think the issue isnt so much that he needed to go but that he cheerfully left it where it was.

Dahlen Thu 18-Apr-13 10:38:41


I'm a runner. I've done marathons. I've been running for more than 20 y ears. I have never crapped anywhere other than on a toilet.

ConferencePear Thu 18-Apr-13 10:41:18

You're right sparechange, but I do think that you are more likely to catch a human disease from a fellow human. Flies and all that.
I'm surprised by how common this is and if the runners genuinely can't help it I think that they should 'go equipped'. We expect people to do that with their dogs.

lljkk Thu 18-Apr-13 10:41:59

It's not uncommon among long distance athletes.
Doesn't bother me as long as it's as thrown into unaccessible bushes as a dog turd would be (middle of brambles or nettles, etc.).
Minging if it was left in someone's garden, though.

LadyBeagleEyes Thu 18-Apr-13 10:45:59

But how can it be healthy?
I thought running = healthy body.
Being unable to control your bowels is surely the complete opposite.

MDA Thu 18-Apr-13 10:49:18

Ew. I couldn't do this, I'd get stage-fright. My bum would clamp shut.

I had my gutters and facia's/soffits or whatever they are called done on my house a few years back, and I was surprised that the chaps doing it never came in to use the bathroom. I even said once "I'm popping out do you want a key in case you need the loo" but they said no. I figured they might have a piss-bucket in their van or something. One doesn't like to speculate.

Then a week or so after they'd gone I went round to the side of the property and was overwhelmed by a stench of stale urine. They had been piddling down the side of my property!!!

I can't believe it, I felt so violated. Particularly as the main one had propositioned me for extra-marital shock

BumBiscuits Thu 18-Apr-13 10:51:44

Get him some adult nappies. Re-usables if you want to be eco-friendly.

I am camp, walk, fish and I don't see the problem with digging a hole in anywhere that there is soil and doing what you need to do. I have done this is park bushes, close by to where I have been fishing. They had to close the public toilets because of them being a regular place where group sex was taking place. "Disgusting", ridiculous attitude to have where there are foxes, rabbits etc, but you probably wouldn't understand unless you have outdoor hobbies.

Bogeyface Thu 18-Apr-13 11:04:25

Birds you are talking about digging a hole and therefore hiding it. This guy pooed and just left it. Why is that ok for him and not for a dog?

Just to add, I have my dog with me, whose poo I have to bag because she doesn't let me know she needs to poo in time for me to dig a hole and then she wouldn't balance above it, that is the difference. Poo buried, no harm done. Children should be kept out of bushes they are usually full of rubbish and discarded drug equipment. It isn't people pooing that is ruining the environment.

I agree that the OP should be telling him to dig a hole, which can be done with a stick or large stone, but it wouldn't be that difficult to carry something to dig with, which people who have outdoor hobbies, usually do.

Yonihadtoask Thu 18-Apr-13 11:13:00

I love mn!

nightskythe pic of the guy running with it streaming down his thighs is just so rank.

Back from my run. No poo ing in bushes required.

MyNameIsSpecial Thu 18-Apr-13 11:13:36

But is the OP Dh really a hard core runner though? Because if he was I would imagine that the Op would have already being filled in with that sort of stuff and wouldn't post?

And this different if your are in the countryside (lots of animals, few people walking past) and in a bush in an urban area (More people, less animals and a very high risk to be spotted!). First I could understand (I would put it under the same things than having a wee/poo during a day long walk).
Second is just disgusting. Seriously would any of you agree to see a toddler having a poo 'in the bushes' because he can't quite make it back home/nearest loo? Or would you expect the mum to have a potty with her at the very least? Can you imagine if all parents with young children though it was OK to tell their dcs 'Oh yes that's fine dd/ds. Have a poo here, it will be fine' showing the bushes next to the pavement?

BTW it's not because a small group of hard core runners think it's OK to do so (out of a race situation) that it means it actually IS OK to do so....

MandragoraWurzelstock Thu 18-Apr-13 11:15:35

Oh GOD this is horrible. I always felt bad that I couldn't run beyond the end of the road without fainting.
Now I know it was God's way of preserving my dignity.

Thank the Lord.

I'm now a bit hmm about joggers tbh, reading this. Bloody hell.

MrsHoarder Thu 18-Apr-13 11:15:57

Where were these bushes? Given your title says "in the street" are you talking about doing a shit in someone's garden here? And the bushes in my front garden are not full of rubbish and discarded drug equipment because I live somewhere where there is not drug equipment dropped and I pick the rubbish out. I would be rather pissed off at having to pick up a stranger's shit.

I've never done it. Are there no pubs/cafes/shops around which would let him use the toilet if he asks politely?

angelos02 Thu 18-Apr-13 11:21:45

Can a runner please explain to me what is so important that they would deem this acceptable behaviour. Running isn't a vital part of life.

badguider Thu 18-Apr-13 11:35:12

THREE times in 15 years!!!
If he runs about three times a week (generally minimum most runners do) that's at least 100 runs a year, allowing for illness and injury so at least 1500 runs... and has been caught short 3 times.

That's at least 1497 runs with no issues and no poos. Do people really think he needs to give up running, only ever run a route that passes a pre-identified public toilet or carry bags and paper every time? really??

Bogeyface Thu 18-Apr-13 11:42:19

That's at least 1497 runs with no issues and no poos. Do people really think he needs to give up running, only ever run a route that passes a pre-identified public toilet or carry bags and paper every time? really??


Why is it so hard to understand that if it might happen it is best to be prepared? I took spare clothes out when I took my children out as babies in case of accidents. In 20 years of child rearing I can only remember 2 incidents where I used them, but I took them anyway, just in case. A nappy bag and a couple of wipes could be tucked into his sock ffs, it hardly needs a rucksack!

It comes down to the fact that there is no excuse whatsoever for a fit and healthy man to leave his shit in the street.

Crinkle77 Thu 18-Apr-13 11:44:28

It is pretty gross but it did make me laugh. My boyfriend had to do this once when he was playing sunday league football. There were no toilets available and as it was sunday morning no pubs or shops open for him to nip in to so he had to do it in a bush then use his sock as toilet paper

K8Middleton Thu 18-Apr-13 11:49:51

I think it's fine if...

a) he's a bear
b) it was in the woods

One expects that.

Lazyjaney Thu 18-Apr-13 11:50:21

I wonder how many people here tutting about joggers caught short occasionally are happy to let their dogs shit wherever, given the large number of dog poos vs infinitely small number of jogger poos one comes across?

Branleuse Thu 18-Apr-13 11:51:00

ok if its in a forest or off the beaten track/trail running with noone about.

In an urban area, absolutely no way.

I dont go for runs unless ive already been for a shit that day, as i know the run will make me need to go, and ive had many an excruciating run home practically touching cloth

AgathaF Thu 18-Apr-13 11:55:56

"Disgusting", ridiculous attitude to have where there are foxes, rabbits etc, but you probably wouldn't understand unless you have outdoor hobbies

Lots of people, myself included, have outdoor hobbies that don't involve leaving a turd in a bush "off the main road" (to me that implies not in a very rural/wooded environment). It's not the fact that he needed to go, it's the fact that he left it lying around in a bush where someone else could end up touching it. Why, when it is so, so simple to just take a bag with you?

Skybore Thu 18-Apr-13 12:03:09

Presumably he gets his kicks from doing this. And although he says 3 times in 15 years, I think you will find it is probably every time he goes out now.

He was telling you just to gauge your reaction, to see if there is a chance that in the near future you might join him in some scat-related play.

Adult nappies might solve his problems, in more ways than one...

LadyBeagleEyes Thu 18-Apr-13 12:03:40

Please tell me he didn't put the sock back on, crinkle.

MrsHoarder Thu 18-Apr-13 12:06:33

Lazyjaney I get annoyed by dog shit too. In fact I would like people who leave dog shit anywhere that isn't their own private land to be banned from keeping dogs add they aren't responsible enough. And human shit is more likely to contain nasties that people can catch.

Pigsmummy Thu 18-Apr-13 12:11:10

Running causes this to happen, it's not pleasant but what is the alternative? If there had been a public toilet nearby I am sure that he would prefer to use that but I am guessing that the bush was nearest option. If no one saw him and the poo is in a bush whois he harming? I am sure that he couldn't get into the shower quick enough when home.

Paula Radcliffe did it during a marathon, there will be people stopping for this reason during the London marathon on Sunday too?

GoSuckEggs Thu 18-Apr-13 12:16:49


twofingerstoGideon Thu 18-Apr-13 12:23:08

So where did he wash his hands?

sparechange Thu 18-Apr-13 13:17:05

Bogeyface - I have been sick about 5 times in the last 10 years
Should I carry a sick bag around with me at all times, just in case I suddenly feel queasy?

And I've locked myself out the house a couple of times as well. Perhaps a tent about my person at all times also.

If everyone carried everything they might need for any eventuality, at all times, we'd all look like we were climbing everest!

sparechange Thu 18-Apr-13 13:18:05

MrsHoarder - And human shit is more likely to contain nasties that people can catch.
Really? Because I've been googling this since OP mentioned it further up the thread and can find zero evidence for this. Zilch

If he is shitting so much, then he is eating too much. Maybe if he reduced his food intake he would not be caught short?

It is disgusting. Dh is a runner, and he cycles. He would NEVER poo on the run so to speak.

BastardDog Thu 18-Apr-13 13:23:07

I used to run so I understand, but I always made it home.

One of my friends had to do it on holiday when she was struck with travellers diarrhoea. She was mortified.

ShowOfHands Thu 18-Apr-13 13:32:15

I do so love the attitude of 'it's never happened to me therefore it can't be true'. What a wonderful and compassionate pov to tote about.

I've never had gallstones therefore they don't exist. And I didn't poo myself during labour so everybody who did is just bloody disgusting.

Idocrazythings Thu 18-Apr-13 13:35:33

Are you sure quint do you always go with him? He might not tell you! grin

LessMissAbs Thu 18-Apr-13 13:35:40

So what do you think a person would do if they were absolutely desperate to go, were miles from home with no handy public toilet nearby, and on foot (either running or walking)?

You'd all be horrified at the start of a reasonably serious women's running race, particularly cross country, where the combination of cold weather and race nerves somehow make your metabolic rate speed up. Conversations tend to be peppered with "I've got to take a crap" answered by "Theres a good bush over there with tree cover". Sometimes on approaching said bush/tree, there will be a sort of handover system, with the next runner acting as look out.

Get more practical, man up, or leave the house for extended periods of time under your own propulsion, and stop being so squeamish about a natural bodily function!

Its a shame you don't share your DH's (running) hobby with him OP!

I so wish I could say : I run with him! grin

But I am not that fit. sad

Maybe he just does not come home and feel the need to tell me that "you know honey, today I found the most marvelous bush to poo behind, you should come and see!"


Idocrazythings Thu 18-Apr-13 13:41:07

I'd say so. They'res not always a lot of dignity in running- it can be a dirty little secret!

FannyFifer Thu 18-Apr-13 13:42:27

Wtf, if you need a shite go to a toilet.

Jaskla Thu 18-Apr-13 13:43:43

It isn't just a normal urge to go that can be put off for those thinking he should have waited/gone to look for a toilet.

It's an awful cramp-like pain like you'd get with an upset stomach - obviously running plays havoc with the digestive system!

I have had it once - luckily I was only 2 minutes from home but I agree that if you weren't near a toilet then you'd be stuck.

All he can do really is try and make sure he 'goes' before he leaves the house or plan a route where he can pass home/a toilet. I agree that 3 times in 15 years doesn't warrant packing bags/tissues every time he runs.

LessMissAbs Thu 18-Apr-13 13:48:08

That's a bit extreme FannyFifer - I mean carrying loo roll and a plastic bag with you when running is doable, but an entire portaloo!

Anyway OP, it sounds like your DH didn't actually crap in the street but behind a bush. I agree crapping in the actual street, on the pavement, with people around you, would be entirely unreasonable, but concealing yourself when you've checked there are no other people about, in undergrowth, if you're really desperate, 3 times in 15 years, is just dealing with it sensibly.

This is why runners are often better with other runners...

Bogeyface Thu 18-Apr-13 13:52:15


I am not talking about random things that just happen. This is something that he knows could happen every time he takes a run so why not take a nappy bag with him? If you knew that you suffered travel sickness then yes, I would expect you to take a sick bag on a coach for example.

stop being so squeamish about a natural bodily function!

Who's squeamish, most of the women on here are mothers, poo comes with the job! As I said above, its not so much about the shit, but the fact that he left it there. Its no better than if it were dog shit.

Bogeyface Thu 18-Apr-13 13:54:15

Why is it ok to say "I am a runner, I need to shit therefore I can shit where I like, get over it" but not to say "I am a dog owner, my dog doesnt have worms therefore it can shit where it likes, get over it"?

MandragoraWurzelstock Thu 18-Apr-13 13:55:13

'Running causes this to happen, it's not pleasant but what is the alternative?'

Erm, don't go running where there's no toilets?

I mean yes if you don't expect it to happen, like, you suddenly become unwell, then of course it's excusable.

But if you KNOW it's likely to happen then really words fail me.

As a sufferer of IBS I am all to familiar with the urgent urge. There have been times when I have genuinely genuinely thought that I was going to soil myself from the horrific agony and urgency of the disease.
The sudden and indescribable hideousness of these attacks are weekly but only ONCE have I actually had the lack of self control to wait for a toilet. It was in a field next to a motorway where the nearest toilets were 20 miles. I have never been so mortified in my life.

YANBU OP at all and anyone who thinks its acceptable is be VVVU. It's filthy and an adult should have the control to hold it or make a plan. It's no excuse being a runner - plan your damn route if it's happened before.

<settles boobs back into place after extreme hoiking. Seeks medical attention for lodged judgey-pants>

JuliaScurr Thu 18-Apr-13 13:57:18

take tissue & bag. hide behind bush to poo
not a problem
littering the countryside with human turds
big problem

LessMissAbs Thu 18-Apr-13 13:58:36

Bogeyface you are aware that there such things as wild animals, eg foxes, badgers, mice, rats, etc - do you think they all use toilets??

Mandora so all runners and some walkers should forego the countryside and forever more confine their routes to 1/2 mile circuits of the toilets in the local park, or a public toilet block? Mmnn, sounds fab!

so all runners and some walkers should forego the countryside and forever more confine their routes to 1/2 mile circuits of the toilets in the local park, or a public toilet block? Mmnn, sounds fab! - if it means that they won't shit somewhere and leave it then yes. Or alternatively they could learn some control or at least to prepare.

What did your mother always say before you went out? "have you gone to the toilet because theres no where to go on the way"

I think the general consensus is that we should expect more from humans than we expect of dogs and their owners.

MandragoraWurzelstock Thu 18-Apr-13 14:04:12

Not as fab as treading in someone else's shit.

sparechange Thu 18-Apr-13 14:08:11

Bogeyface, sorry, you are making me laugh
He knows it could happen every time he goes for a run?
As someone else pointed out, 3 times in 15 years means there is a 0.02% chance of him needing a poo while he runs

That is like saying every pregnant woman knows she might go into labour at any point after 28 weeks because there is a small % of prem labours so she should put a plastic sheet on every tube/bus/restaurant seat she sits on
Or DCs should never ever be allowed out in public before the age of 8 in case there are any accidents

Are you really suggesting everyone needs to be prepared for something that has a 0.02% statistical likelihood of happening? Really?

GoSuckEggs Thu 18-Apr-13 14:09:34

Oh Jesus, when i saw this thread title i got scared that it was about me!!

A couple of nights ago i was walking the dog, and suddenly got the worse cramps and had to run behind a tree and shit!

It was horrendous. I didnt think i would be able to make it home. Lucky i didnt try because it was volcanic! blush

Bogeyface Thu 18-Apr-13 14:22:30

Bogeyface you are aware that there such things as wild animals, eg foxes, badgers, mice, rats, etc - do you think they all use toilets??

Are YOU aware that you have a choice about it and they dont? I dont expect animals to use a toilet, but I do expect you to show some consideration for others and clean up after yourself. If that means shoving a very very small plastic bag into you pocket or whatever, then why cant you do it?

And every pregnant woman over 28 weeks is aware that she could go into labour at any time, however unlikely that is, and therefore is prepared by carrying her notes and making sure she is going to be somewhere within phone distance of medical help. You know, like the midwife tells you to hmm

Bogeyface Thu 18-Apr-13 14:23:39

So all runners are animals who cant possibly be held accountable for leaving random shits about the place?

That explains a lot.

limitedperiodonly Thu 18-Apr-13 14:24:25

I bet your dog was mortified gosuckeggs. Did he try to get you to the kerb first?

formicaqueen Thu 18-Apr-13 14:31:14

I have pooed on a run. It was in an isolated rural spot and I couldn't see the problem. Not sure I'd poo on a city run

Skybore Thu 18-Apr-13 14:32:29

QuintessentialOHaraThu 18-Apr-13 14:03:52
"I think the general consensus is that we should expect more from humans than we expect of dogs and their owners."

Snigger... yet well said smile

livinginwonderland Thu 18-Apr-13 14:45:45

My dad goes fell-running - as in, 20+ miles up mountains in the arsehole of nowhere, so there are no public toilets for miles. Runners regularly pee while running or squat behind rocks/bushes to relieve themselves. I have, disgustingly, seen a man finishing the race with poo all over his thighs. You could clearly tell it wasn't just mud and it was horrible - I'd rather he'd gone behind a bush!

Runners trots are a real thing - I would rather someone pooed in a bush than ran past me with poo running down their thighs!

babyfirefly1980 Thu 18-Apr-13 14:46:38

The thing is Dog owners get castigated for leaving shit around and rightly so. Someone on a run should not think they have an excuse to crap where they want and leave it.

Stropperella Thu 18-Apr-13 14:51:44

Um, if a particular form of exercise causes you to get stomach cramps and diarrhoea, is it actually good for you? Perhaps those who get struck down with "runners' trots" should just stay in and run on a treadmill.

Skybore Thu 18-Apr-13 14:53:27

This thread has been an education... of sorts.

ChasingDogs Thu 18-Apr-13 14:54:47

Well if he's got runner's shits there isn't a lot he can do about it is there?

He does need to go back and clear it up/bury it though. And I'm not sure why so many people think it's fine to shit in rural areas. Some of us do actually live here, and walk in those secluded woods daily (including off the paths). The countryside is not a toilet for runners (or anyone else that doesn't have the excuse of being feral grin). Clear it up or bury it properly, please!

GoSuckEggs Thu 18-Apr-13 14:57:20

limitedperiodonly um no.... i had to try and fight the filthy little git off because he was trying eat it. it was not a pretty sight. me with pants down, horrendous shits trying to squat and hold top and trousers out of shit all the while trying to fight the dog away from eating it.

honest to god i was almost sick.

livinginwonderland Thu 18-Apr-13 15:04:53

Um, if a particular form of exercise causes you to get stomach cramps and diarrhoea, is it actually good for you? Perhaps those who get struck down with "runners' trots" should just stay in and run on a treadmill.

what? really? so all professional runners who get this should just give it up and run on a treadmill for the rest of their lives?

runners trots is a real thing. it's not because these people are disgusting or unfit or doing something wrong.

limitedperiodonly Thu 18-Apr-13 15:05:10

Eurghh! No at trying to eat it.

LessMissAbs Thu 18-Apr-13 15:11:54

Life must be so limiting if you must never walk, drive or run without being near a toilet at all times. I had no idea people planned their lives in this way until this thread! (apologies to anyone with IBS, I am not meaning you).

Gad, just think of all those hillwalkers, who go out for day long walks! I wonder what they do! (and sadly, this thread has got me wondering!)

SUMMERFRUIT Thu 18-Apr-13 15:12:01

sorry but if you have to go, you have to go runner

Blatherskite Thu 18-Apr-13 15:20:03

I run. I have never done this.


Letitsnow9 Thu 18-Apr-13 15:20:58

If he could of ended his run and made it home then gross, if he couldn't hold it in, well if you have to go, you have to go. It's so much more acceptable to vomit in public than from the other end but you have the same level of control.

ThatVikRinA22 Thu 18-Apr-13 15:23:03

a friend of mines dog rolled in some human poo. disgusting.

why do people think its ok? and just leave it there?? no its not on. and i run too.
if i was so desperate i would run home.

LadyBeagleEyes Thu 18-Apr-13 15:25:02

As someone that was married to a hill walker for many years, who camped overnight, he always dug a hole and buried it, though I often wondered about how polluting all the loo roll must be.
I believe in the more popular hillwalker areas like the Lakes, there's a lot of litter left including toilet paper, and people will poo indiscriminately so watch your feet.

NinaHeart Thu 18-Apr-13 15:25:39

I used to run a lot. I even did a marathon. Not once did I crap anywhere except in a loo. (self righteous icon)

Op's DH...NO!

ProfYaffle Thu 18-Apr-13 15:28:54

Dh's exgf was a runner and apparently pooed in fields all the time, used to take loo roll with her and everything.

ItsAllGoingToBeFine Thu 18-Apr-13 15:30:07

I think some people are deliberately misunderstanding.

Occasionally you may have to have a shit when you run. It is not caused by not having a poo before you leave or by over exercising or by being a filthy minger. No one knows what causes it. Just because it has not happened to you doesn't mean it won't. Just because it has happened doesn't mean it will happen again.

It doesn't happen a certain distance into your run. You can't plan for it.

If it does happen you will have an involuntary and uncontrollable urge to void your bowels. You cannot hold it in. You have two choices 1. shit yourself. 2. Shit somewhere else.

If you are very lucky with impeccable sphincter control you may have time to check for passers by before ripping your shorts down.

It is not something runners have any control over. The only way to stop it is for nobody to run, ever, just in case.

Are it as what it is, a sudden illness. And feel sorry for those afflicted - there is nothing more humiliating than trying desperately not to shit yourself whilst trying to find somewhere discreet to go whilst panicking that someone will spot you in this vile act.

Bearbehind Thu 18-Apr-13 15:36:17

This is gross but it shows some runners don't use bushes grin

LadyBeagleEyes Thu 18-Apr-13 15:39:24

I wonder if Mo Farrah has ever crapped himself or got caught short.

Bearbehind Thu 18-Apr-13 15:39:44

I was walking along the canal a while ago and saw a man ahead of me get out of his van and onto the tow path carrying something white.

It was really misty but I couldn't see him ahead of me anymore so got a bit freaked out, until I glanced to the right and saw his white arse in the bushes!

Seems some van drivers even go out armed with bog roll for their bush trips!

HullMum Thu 18-Apr-13 15:46:22

it doesn't matter if runners understand. the vast majority of other human being don't want to step in shit. or have their children throw their ball in it

thursday Thu 18-Apr-13 15:48:19

i run. i dont poo in bushes but i know other people who've been caught out while out and about. not in town though, in the hills where there aren't public toilets. its a bit grim but not in the same league as this. i caught someone cacking in my back street recently, while walking my kids to school. i was too stunned to confront them and as they were about 3 paces from the steaming pile with a tissue on top my kids were unaware and i didn't want to change that. it was a woman delivering faux charity plastic bags. urgh.

HeyYoniYoni Thu 18-Apr-13 15:51:58

If an activity causes you to need to deficate somewhere other than a toilet I'd suggest that perhaps you shouldn't be partaking in that activity

andubelievedthat Thu 18-Apr-13 16:08:08

Several years ago 50 ish of us decided it would be a fun day out to walk to top of Ben Nevis , evening prior to said walk ,all but myself and a handfull of others were in pub ,and of course on said walk(climb really) plenty needed to poo/pee ,only thing is , the landscape of said mountain is barren ,i.e. no no cover! like none ! how far my friends had to run to get out of eyesight ! the shame ! the laughs! being a natural beauty site nothing is allowed to be installed near or on mountain,i.e. portaloos, re your fella >has he never heard of Dock leaves ?

MandragoraWurzelstock Thu 18-Apr-13 16:24:07

'so all professional runners who get this should just give it up and run on a treadmill for the rest of their lives?'


I'm not wanting to suggest that there's no purpose any more for 'professional' runners, as such, but we do have a postal system these days. And buses.

KatyTheCleaningLady Thu 18-Apr-13 16:32:32

There's a theory that humans did evolve to run long distances. Humans can literally outrun many much faster animals, like gazelles, just through endurance. Our early ancestors probably got a lot of their protein this way.

VivaLeBeaver Thu 18-Apr-13 16:34:09

dh does this. But at least he poos in fields mid run as we're rural.

Bogeyface Thu 18-Apr-13 16:40:27

I am still yet to hear why runners can't carry a nappy bag with them and clean up after themselves.

Sparklingbrook Thu 18-Apr-13 16:42:02

Because it would ruin their 'time' Bogey. sad

MandragoraWurzelstock Thu 18-Apr-13 16:50:04

C'est Bizarre.

Floggingmolly Thu 18-Apr-13 16:50:05

He's a filthy muck lark.

Feelingood Thu 18-Apr-13 16:57:02

Is t it against the law?

phantomnamechanger Thu 18-Apr-13 17:01:58

We have a huge problem in the rural lanes near where I live with lorry drivers leaving bottles of piss and bags of poo everywhere - we are near the channel tunnel and ferries, the motorway verges are littered with it, sometimes it is lobbed out of moving vehicles! I pity the poor beggars who have to go round clearing it all up.

It is absolutley disgusting, as are you runners who do not bag and bin it. Illness and dire emergency is one thing, accepting that this may happen and not going prepared is just irresponsible. Vile.

Idocrazythings Thu 18-Apr-13 17:05:48

Just say someone took their poo in a little baggy, what do they do then with it? Carry it home like a drink bottle, put it in their iPod holder or pocket? Most dog owners seem to tie it to their dog lead. And they are generally walking. It's not like there's a huge amount of bins around here… I truly think on the rare occasion someone has do a nature poo, that they are discrete and bury/cover it. If not then they deserve the flaming that is happening here.

Can just see the next AIBU- I just saw a runner carrying a bag of poo, swinging it like a medal. AIBU to think its a bit minging?

Stropperella Thu 18-Apr-13 17:06:19

Hmm, well, perhaps those who are so afflicted should do a little bit more research. If you google "runners trots" and "how to avoid" it seems to indicate that there are steps you can take. Dr Google appears to give a fair bit of advice on the subject.

JenaiMorris Thu 18-Apr-13 17:06:46

It's fucking revolting.

And hmm at it somehow being not quite so bad because badgers and rabbits (rabbits ffs!) don't use loos.

I live semi-rurally. Lots of wildlife. Not once on a walk have I had bother with badger, fox, or rabbit crap.

Dog shit, yes, because some dog owners have the same opinion it seems as some posters here - that because wild animals and livestock defecate in the countryside that it's OK to leave their dogs' shit all over the place. It isn't.

He should have gone back and clearerd it up, the filthy fucker.

miemohrs Thu 18-Apr-13 17:07:33

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

redandblacks Thu 18-Apr-13 17:08:31

.. here's me thinking we had bears on the loose. I never knew that about runners either and will always look at the school running team of parents in a different light now - incontinence pads?

redandblacks Thu 18-Apr-13 17:11:10

I couldn't do it - perhaps there is a correlation between those who poo on the roads and those who poo at work ( which I have never done either). If it ever happened to me it would only happen once as I would never run out in public again

VeganCow Thu 18-Apr-13 17:12:12

If he knows he has done it once, twice, now three times before, if he goes out running from now on without wipes and a bag, I would now be pretty put off him if I were you.i

Brings this to mind - Gary Lineker shitting himself on the pitch

Bogeyface Thu 18-Apr-13 17:15:05

Just say someone took their poo in a little baggy, what do they do then with it? Carry it home like a drink bottle, put it in their iPod holder or pocket?

Ermm yes! Why not? If it is not so disgusting that they can leave on the ground surely it isnt so disgusting that they can carry it home with them?

I am gobsmacked that anyone can honestly say its ok! I live in a rural area popular with runners, I previously thought that we had a dog shit problem, now I am not so sure.

redandblacks Thu 18-Apr-13 17:17:42

Now understand why newlyweds on honeymoon typically write about a jog BEFORE breakfast

Idocrazythings Thu 18-Apr-13 17:20:18

But bogey talking about genuine people not the piss takers, that genuinely try to do the right thing and are truly stuck and can and will hide/bury it. Would you expect them to carry it home even if they are say 7miles from home?

JamieandtheMagicTorch Thu 18-Apr-13 17:26:40

Take a trowel and bury it.

Or, if taking a trowel is unrealistic, crap in a bag

Or, accept the message that running is frankly, unnatural.

redandblacks Thu 18-Apr-13 17:28:04

Perhpas he was trying to curl out a huge Mars Bar - but in the end he only did a marathon !!!

redandblacks Thu 18-Apr-13 17:28:36

Bu hey, shit happens....

JamieandtheMagicTorch Thu 18-Apr-13 17:29:21

I am also surprised from a physiological POV that this is the body's response to running. I would have thought that all available resources would be diverted waway from the digestive system to the leg muscles, so peristalsis would stop.

<shaky O level grasp of human biology>

limitedperiodonly Thu 18-Apr-13 17:40:05

Can I ask? When your dog shits and you bag it, can you put it in an ordinary bin or is that wrong?

There aren't any dog poo bins here (urban area) and people generally clean up.

I used to go running with DH. He never mentioned this phenomenon probably because it would have put me off even more. I'm going to question him on his habits later.

fuzzpig Thu 18-Apr-13 17:40:40

<refuses to click any links on this thread>

louisianablue2000 Thu 18-Apr-13 17:42:29

A quick google shows it's illegal to defecate or urinate in public (what a surprise!), there was a taxi driver fined £750 in Bristol earlier this year after being caught on camera doing it. It's part of the local government act.

redandblacks Thu 18-Apr-13 18:00:33

Could be a kind of kundalini activation!!

Latara Thu 18-Apr-13 18:02:32

This poo thread is hilarious! I'm now looking at the runners i know in a different (very suspicious) light...

I've sometimes worried about this happening to me - I don't run, but one of my jobs is leaflet distribution, which can involve being a long way from a loo. I have occasionally had to wee behind a bush, but TBH I just think there should be more public loos. What is really horrible is when you want the loo, you spot a block of them, go haring up to the door and it's locked and bolted...

JamieandtheMagicTorch Thu 18-Apr-13 18:16:59

It is true, there should be more public loos. It is a massive issue for elderly people, too. Can really out limitations on their lives.

JamieandtheMagicTorch Thu 18-Apr-13 18:17:41

Put, not out

kotinka Thu 18-Apr-13 18:25:17

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Skybore Thu 18-Apr-13 18:36:58

Idocrazythings Thu 18-Apr-13 17:20:18
"Would you expect them to carry it home even if they are say 7miles from home?"

Why on earth would he have to carry it home? Put it in the first bin he comes to surely? And as he has form with this, suggest he plans his route accordingly. As I said in my last post, suspect he gets a kick out of doing this.

NC78 Thu 18-Apr-13 18:39:31


redandblacks Thu 18-Apr-13 18:58:10

I feel a new smartphone app coming on

RescueCack Thu 18-Apr-13 19:40:35

OK, now he's home from work I have interrogated him further.

The bush was a long way from the path, which wasn't a street (my hysteria may have got the better of me here...) and he thinks only animals would be in the area. I know where he means and it isn't a shortcut to anything, it's by a stream, so probably no foot traffic. He would no way be able to find it to clean it up now - it's too big a 'wild' space. Also, you couldn't pick it up <boak>.

Thankfully it has rained torrentially this afternoon, so it's probably gone.

Still minging.

I don't feel like he's sorry enough.

kotinka Thu 18-Apr-13 19:48:56

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Being 'a runner' doesn't make him above consideration for others, imo

This is the point exactly! I don't care where it is, it's filthy and making comparisons to animals is ridiculous. Animals eat other animals shit - does that make it ok for us to?!

And saying "when you have to go, you have to go" - see all of the posts on here from IBS sufferers, if we can hold it!!!

Floggingmolly Thu 18-Apr-13 20:21:54

He thinks only animals would be in the area hmm. He could be right...
Face it op, you married a guttersnipe.

Lazyjaney Thu 18-Apr-13 20:58:55

So, if a joggers shits in the bushes and no one from MumNet hears about it.....

Fakebook Thu 18-Apr-13 21:14:38

The shit is near a stream? And it rained torrentially? Well done, he's just probably poisoned a whole stream full of animals.

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Thu 18-Apr-13 21:15:52

DS did this once. We were in the middle of nowhere, he was five, he couldn't wait. I had no bags, nothing. I shoved him in a bush, gave him a leaf to wipe with and put leaves over the poo. Grim.

EleanorFarjeon Thu 18-Apr-13 21:31:27

I have been a runner for years. Not once has it made me need to shit.

I once saw an old woman do this in a park in Nice.

I must've done this shock for an hour afterwards.

Very, very bad to not clear it up. OMG imagine standing in that.

Maybe the OP's dh has a weak anus?

<clutches at straws>

pigsDOfly Thu 18-Apr-13 21:46:57

Well OP, if you DH knows it's a hazard that runners are likely to face why was he not prepared.

For some time I've seen poo in the street and thought it might be human, now I'm beginning to think it probably is.

Make him take a poo bag or several with him in future when he runs (in both senses) so that at least he can clean up after himself. Yuk.

LetsFaceTheMusicAndDance Thu 18-Apr-13 21:48:33

Filthy pig needs to take a dog poo bag out with him every time and crap in that if he needs too.

mateinthree Thu 18-Apr-13 21:52:42

Lots of dog owners and 100% of cat owners seem to think it's acceptable for turds to be made and left by their animals wherever and whenever the turd creator needs one. Why should humans be different?

pigsDOfly Thu 18-Apr-13 22:01:21

Just because some dog owners are inconsiderate and disgusting doesn't make it ok for humans to shit all over the place and add to it mateinthree.

I wouldn't dream of leaving my dog's poo on the street, in the park or in the woods. I would like to think that human poo is just as unacceptable to most right thinking people as dog poo.

mateinthree Thu 18-Apr-13 22:04:32

I'm just playing devil's advocate wink Human poo, dog poo, cat poo, all pretty disgusting, but why such an extreme reaction to the human variant?

ZZZenagain Thu 18-Apr-13 22:08:05

if he needed to go, he needed to. He went off the path and did it in a bush. I don't think it is the end of the world. It is the dog poo littered all over the place which disgusts me tbh.

Jengnr Thu 18-Apr-13 22:08:54

Seriously, this 'if you're a runner you'll understand' bollocks is just that. If running makes you need to have a dump wherever you happen to be and leave it for everyone else then fucking WALK.

It's grim.

foreverondiet Thu 18-Apr-13 22:24:28

I have been caught out, so now use a glycerine suppository before I leave the house. Generally when I have been caught out and have to go into Starbucks or a pub or petrol station - but live in fear of out running and no toilets.... generally i run in the gym for that reason (easy to stop treadmill do poo and back to treadmill).

I have some sympathy, running makes you need to go and if there are toilets its that or crap yourself. But if you poo into a nappy sack and put it in bin don't see why its so vile?

JamieandtheMagicTorch Thu 18-Apr-13 22:28:14

Friend of mine used to find human poo down her street most weekends. Some street drug or other makes you crap almost immediately, apparently. Forget which. Heroine?

JamieandtheMagicTorch Thu 18-Apr-13 22:28:48

Or even heroin

Human poo, dog poo, cat poo, all pretty disgusting, but why such an extreme reaction to the human variant?

Because its nice to think that humans are more sophisticated than animals and can, for the most part, control their bowel movements.

If everyone deficated wherever the wanted - bushes or no bushes - then we'd live in a filthy society. Runners don't get an exception pass from this. It's like saying its ok for cyclists to litter or for newly weds to shag in public... fails to come up with decent example in bed

LadyBeagleEyes Thu 18-Apr-13 22:40:01

Heroin constipates you Jamie.
So not that.
My view of runners has totally changed after this thread.
Now if I see one I'll look with different eyes.
And watch where I put my feet.

Nicknamefail Thu 18-Apr-13 22:44:13

I'm with the runners, running makes you poo. Urgently. Sorry. Although he should always carry an emergency bag (even if only 3 times in 15 years). Leaving it is unacceptable.

Floggingmolly Thu 18-Apr-13 22:53:39

But if you know this in advance, Nickname, it can hardly take you by surprise? confused. Run in the direction of a toilet, ffs.

LayMizzRarb Thu 18-Apr-13 23:06:08

What a filthy pig.

Nicknamefail Thu 18-Apr-13 23:18:28

Not me flogging! But know of others.... (Also v v infrequently like op oh)
Hard to do a 20 mile run close to toilets though.

Bogeyface Fri 19-Apr-13 00:15:27

In Sue Townsends book Number Ten there is a crack house full of people shitting themselves, so its probably that. Grim.

As I have said before, it isnt the need to shit that is the problem, its the leaving it that disgusts me. Dont do your shit and cheerfully walk away, you would clean up after a dog so clean up after yourself!

cumfy Fri 19-Apr-13 02:00:42

Yes, why doesn't he just run round the block a few hundred times.

The this will never happen.

lobsterkiller Fri 19-Apr-13 07:29:47

Not sure if already posted but its called "runners tum". I used to run but had to give up in the end due to the need to go to the loo everytime i ran, however i always made sure i got home!!

youmaycallmeSSP Fri 19-Apr-13 10:06:35

Oh yuck. If he really was caught out and had no other option then he should at least have gone back with a bag and cleared it up after his run.

Maybe he should get one of these. My 3yo rates it hmm

Good lord. Talk about overreacting. Human shit is not nice - I get that. But how many runners do you think are regularly (or indeed ever) crapping on runs in the street? Have you seen any? Is it likely? If it's in a bush or out in a hedgerow or field, nobody will ever know it's there. Some are carrying on as if their children are going to be knee-deep in it. And those of you using it as a reason why people should give up running... what nonsense. And I'm sure the great explorers and mountaineers etc should have just stayed at home in case they needed a poo while they were off discovering new countries or scaling Everest or whatever, in case there was no Starbucks handy.

But how many runners do you think are regularly (or indeed ever) crapping on runs in the street?

Two days ago I used to think none, now I know that is a hell of a lot more! bleurgh

Skybore Fri 19-Apr-13 13:38:04

foreverondiet Thu 18-Apr-13 22:24:28
"I have been caught out, so now use a glycerine suppository before I leave the house."

Too much information, thanks!

Skybore Fri 19-Apr-13 13:42:24

And if the goal is NOT to do a crap when you are out running, why would you want to use a Glycerine supp anyway?

fromparistoberlin Fri 19-Apr-13 15:03:57

ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww at marathon runner shitter photo

lottiegarbanzo Fri 19-Apr-13 15:26:45

I ran for years and have never done this, or considered it. Plenty of fibre and regular habits, no need! In fact I believe exercise helps digestion, so you're more regular as a result.

I've also done lots of hill walking, so see nothing wrong with peeing behind a bush when really necessary but would never poo. I have come across human poos on top of mountains, visible under a rock and it's gross, really, really foul. Much bigger, wetter and smellier than sheep poo, which is pretty innocuous.

I think any runner who believes they may feel the need should carry a bag and a trowel, just in case!

lottiegarbanzo Fri 19-Apr-13 15:31:34

Btw, if this really disgusts you, don't ever go on holiday to India. Not an issue confined to runners there!

merlottits Fri 19-Apr-13 15:43:55

Yes please NEVER visit India.

People just drop trou and lay a cable all the time. Revolting.

I can't get worked up about the odd runner's turd. Still reeling from the news that Gary Lineker shat himself during 1990 world cup.

TheRivieraKid Fri 19-Apr-13 15:49:55

Catching up very late with this thread but I think it's crack that makes you need to take a dump quite quickly Jamie. A few years back we lived in a house that backed onto another row of houses. Local druggies used to use the path as a place to take a crap all the time. Not a nice sight when you open your curtains, and it stunk in the summer.

I think it's disgusting. YANBU OP.

TheSmallClanger Fri 19-Apr-13 15:51:08

Adults, without SN or sudden health problems, should not leave their poo lying around in public. It is disgusting. The general code for hillwalking and rough camping is that you bury it.

On a related note, DD asked me once last year what happens when you need the loo urgently during the Tour de France. I had to admit that I did not know. DD pointed out that wetting yourself and then riding a bike for hours sitting in it would give you nappy rash. She didn't mention the other thing.

fascicle Fri 19-Apr-13 15:55:57

A vote for the OP's husband. If this happened to him regularly, you'd expect him to carry a bag, or have an emergency poo plan. But he was clearly caught unawares (3 times in 15 years is rare in my book). The only other option may have been to have crapped in his clothes (please see Paula Radcliffe note below). Surely that's more unpleasant/disturbing for your hubby and anyone else who would have seen him.

For all the runners who haven't felt the need - you're very lucky. Don't assume that other runners' constitutions are the same as yours. Regardless of how healthy your diet is, how regular you are, whether you've already had a good crap that day - if the contractions come, it can be hard to stop them. I've always managed to get home, but it's a horrible feeling.

Re: Paula Radcliffe. I think it was during a London Marathon she had a public wee, and the Athens Olympic Marathon where she had some sort of infection and accidentally crapped herself in her kit, having pulling out of the race close to the end.

JamieandtheMagicTorch Fri 19-Apr-13 16:46:06

Thanks to those who replied about crack smile

Floggingmolly Fri 19-Apr-13 17:07:58

A vote for the op's husband
He wasn't running a marathon; he was going for a jog.
There are no circumstances under which having a shite in a public highway in civilised society is acceptable.
I'm assuming crack addiction doesn't apply?

limitedperiodonly Fri 19-Apr-13 17:24:57

Very brave of you to refer to runners as 'going for a jog' floggingmolly grin

I've never noticed my local streets and parks awash with human shit. Perhaps I'll inspect the next public turd I see more closely. Or perhaps not.

This thread is slightly hysterical and I'm not a jogger, marathon runner or irresponsible dog owner. It's fun, though.

Idocrazythings Fri 19-Apr-13 17:37:45

I've followed this thread and found it quite amusing, and commented a few times. However I'm getting a bit hmm. Really it's not a joke and people like the OPs husband are usually pretty embarrassed by it.

Even though the OP says poo. We're not really talking about a poo, runners trots is actually really sharp stomach cramps, followed by an urgent need to poo; sometimes you can ignore it, and it goes away (long enough for you to get home) other times it builds in intensity. The result is actually a pretty explosive poo. not one easily picked up really I have been lucky enough to always make it to a toilet, but I've come close.

They'res no predicting it, it might not happen for weeks then happen for a few runs in a row. It might happen 20min into a run or after 120 min. You can try running on an empty stomach, diet changes, drinking while running not drinking… but it doesn't make a huge difference. Immodium helps but who wants to take that every run.

If running is your main form of exercise and you really enjoy it, then the randomness of it happening is enough not to put you off running.

Do other runners agree?

fascicle Fri 19-Apr-13 18:09:11

Yes, I agree Idocrazy, although there are some runners on the thread who don't seem sympathetic, since it hasn't happened to them. Generally, I don't think people appreciate that this isn't like 'normal' bowel habits or evacuation. It's more like being in the final stage of labour, fired by rocket fuel.

lottiegarbanzo Fri 19-Apr-13 18:16:44

But if you think it might happen to you, don't you carry some means of containing or concealing it? Even if that means doing it in your undies or shorts, bagging and binning / carrying them?

As someone said, for hill walkers and campers, there is a protocol, you bury it. I appreciate most runners don't carry much with them but those who need to, like fell runners, do carry essential equipment. I don't see why those prone to exploding bowels shouldn't be equally prepared, just in case.

Idocrazythings Fri 19-Apr-13 18:24:26

I don't think they do fascicle which is why I wrote it (several others have said it too) it's disappointing, mainly, what other runners, who don't get it, are writing. Which is why I wrote what I wrote. That and the fact I don't want everyone thinking runners are a bunch of dirty mingers!

PassTheCremeEggs Fri 19-Apr-13 18:29:10

This is so grim. Our dog disappeared into a bush recently and rolled in human poo - I've never been so repulsed. Your DH should take a bag, it's not that hard, I pick up after my dog every day, why on earth is it ok for him not to pick up after himself?? Ewwwwww.

Idocrazythings Fri 19-Apr-13 18:33:08

No lottie. Until this thread I never really thought about it to be honest. I've always been able to get home or to a toilet. Personally I have one run I can think of where if it happened I'd be stuck as there are no toilets- think tow path/ embankment area; but that's about it. And truly, if it was that dire that I couldn't get to a toilet at some point I shudder to think of the consequences, but a nappy bag would not be adequate.

Floggingmolly Fri 19-Apr-13 18:33:53

But they are a bunch of dirty mingers if they realise the possibility but make no provision for it, Idocrazy. confused. What am I missing?

Idocrazythings Fri 19-Apr-13 18:44:14

Truly. I give up. It's not something that happens all the time. Hardly ever. Most people are able to get to a toilet. It's not something you could pick up easily so taking a bag would be useless. A genuine person who found themselves in this situation would make sure they buried it, covered it up and cleaned the area. They then would do a mortified run of shame home.

fascicle Fri 19-Apr-13 19:42:50

Floggingmolly - it's happened three times in fifteen years to the OP's DH. With that frequency, it's like insisting that everyone walks around with a bucket in case they need to projectile vomit and can't reach a toilet.

lottiegarbanzo Fri 19-Apr-13 20:08:41

So you can't make provision, like ensure your ability to bury it but, if a genuine person, you would make sure you buried it and cleaned up? I'm confused.

To change tack, (sorry, this may have been covered) but advice from a friend who went on lots of demonstrations, once upon a time, was that, as shitting in public counts as public indecency (no surprise there - and actually, I think she was talking about weeing in these circs), what one must do if finding oneself desparate while trapped in the midst of a very large crowd in the middle of say Trafalgar Square, is announce very loudly, preferably close to a policeman, 'I am about to squat down and have a wee/poo', thus you have given those who might see, the opportunity to look away and avoid offence. Then, I am sure, protocol would be to borrow said policeman's helmet to cover the offending result, avoiding any unpleasant stepping effects.

So the moral is, if in a public place, where other people may pass by, don't be shy, be assertively inoffensive!

Idocrazythings Fri 19-Apr-13 20:41:08

Nope. I've given up. You're just taking the piss, or should I say shit? grin

thecook Fri 19-Apr-13 23:03:06

Op - I would be leaving him

I am a very good runner. I exercise almost every day. And I have never felt the need for a shit whilst on the track. Fucking disgusting.

Southeastdweller Fri 19-Apr-13 23:08:15

How vile. Truly gross. He's a human for god's sake, not an animal. There's no good reason for this kind of thing, only pathetic excuses.

Has this 'incident' made you think of him differently?

LessMissAbs Fri 19-Apr-13 23:13:11

thecook I am a very good runner. I exercise almost every day. And I have never felt the need for a shit whilst on the track. Fucking disgusting

Odd way to put it. Tracks always have toilet facilities. So why would you mention it if you run every day on the track? Or do you mean you run off-road? Or do you do your steady runs round the track too, in circuits of 400m, almost every day?

lottiegarbanzo Fri 19-Apr-13 23:19:38

I'm simply seeking truth.

On which note, OP, we do need to know whether your DH's poo was of the ordinary 'needing a poo' variety, or, one of these rocket-fuelled, contraction-propelled, super-splattery special runners' variety.

On that subject, I have learnt something and, have a whole new topic for discussion when I re-join my running club. Fab!

thecook Fri 19-Apr-13 23:20:05

LessMissAbs Track and road. Yes there are toilet facilities at the track. If I ever did feel the need to do a shit whilst training I would go to the toilet. But this has happened before to the OP‘s partner so why doesn't he run close to home?

bluepapermonkey Fri 19-Apr-13 23:20:59

ewww. i always thought it was drug addicts - but it's runners!

that is so foul.

Doinmummy Fri 19-Apr-13 23:31:45

Not read the whole thread but have now got an image in my head of a row of portaloos with runners going round and round them a la musical chairs !

redandblacks Fri 19-Apr-13 23:34:39

perhaps they should install a sushi style conveyor belt alongside the tow path which feeds into a sealed waste disposal unit. Runners could squat across it and deposit their token of appreciation as and when. On the other hand, a supermarket bag without holes would be better than a nappy bag (surely?) and would weigh nothing to carry in a pouch. Failing that a drawstring bin liner?

redandblacks Fri 19-Apr-13 23:35:16

Brown plates wink

redandblacks Fri 19-Apr-13 23:40:30

Seriously though, if you are saving on gym fees and enjoying the priviledge of having everyone move aside as soon as they see you coming (old ladies and babies in pushchairs included) then it is almost bullying behaviour to antagonise the said people by shitting your spleen out in transit. Here is a link to get you a free colostomy bag:

fascicle Sat 20-Apr-13 11:07:13

I don't get the lack of understanding, and condemnation, especially from runners like thecook. Just because you have not experienced this, doesn't mean it's down to greater control or superior standards. It simply means you are lucky.

If runners are susceptible to runners trots, then I'm sure, for their own sake as well as others, they are likely to manage their condition e.g. by avoiding certain known food/drink triggers, ensuring they have evacuated before a run (helpful, but not fully preventative), and choosing routes that include toilet facilities or running in loops so they're never far from home.

However, the OP's husband has only had three incidents in 15 years. So it's untypical for him and he's not expecting to be caught short.

To all posters condemning this as disgusting behaviour - can you confirm that 1. You have never been caught short and had to wee outside 2. You have never had the misfortune to vomit before reaching a toilet.

Bogeyface Sat 20-Apr-13 11:17:57

Why do people keep comparing this with vomitting?

Generally if a person vomits its because of an illness or condition such as morning sickness. They cant possibly know that it is going to happen and cannot be reasonably expected to be prepared for it as it is a rare occurance. However, as "runners trots" is widely known about and is a known possibility for anyone taking a long run, there is no reason why the runner cant be prepared for it.

Vomiters who throw up due to excess of alcohol are just as bad imo, as they know that getting shitfaced is likely to lead to them vomiting and should be treated just as harshly as someone pissing/shitting in the street.

fascicle Sat 20-Apr-13 14:35:31

Why do people keep comparing this with vomitting?
Both can happen without warning; are pretty involuntary etc.

They cant possibly know that it is going to happen and cannot be reasonably expected to be prepared for it as it is a rare occurance.
You could be writing about the OP's husband...

there is no reason why the runner can't be prepared for it
Generally yes, but in the OP's husband's case, it's an average of once every five years.

NetworkGuy Sat 20-Apr-13 15:36:47

"but it is harder to find one now as many round here have been shut."

Exactly. Before I had an operation, last year, I had to wear a catheter, so had no "desperate to go" moments, and having moved to a new city, took a few hours out of my day (in fact to see what laptops there were, for someone asking on MN) to go off to another part of the city to explore a retail park, and walk back.

I walked seven miles through various suburbs, saw the odd collection of shops, a few places I won't likely ever wish to see again, and apart from an Asda store that was open, which I did pop into, but not to use the loo, can distinctly remember not seeing a single public toilet where one might be able to "go". Additionally, on that 7 mile walk, not a single park bench (and I walked through several small and one large park). So "green" the city may be, but facilities are definitely lacking.

Obviously there may be Asda, Tesco and so on if you were in a city or town, but public toilets are nowhere to be seen around here.

Yes, blame it on vandalism, government spending cuts, or whatever, forcing local councils to close or remove them (or in some places such as where I lived in N Wales, add one of the 20p public toilets with the doors which open automatically after a certain number of minutes, like it or not!) but I'd say the chances of finding public toilets in many areas are getting fewer and fewer.

I was going to start delivering some leaflets for my own business (if I can get enough people to switch internet I could give up "working" for a living) but the prospect of 3-5 hours wandering the streets with no public toilets makes it change from "healthy exercise" into a "toilet nightmare" !

I'm not advocating deliberate use of a bush but if you've got to go, then I'm afraid you've got to go, and I'm not going to criticise anyone who just cannot "hold it". Maybe I'm nore forgiving now I'm getting much closer to retirement age than you youngsters!!

PS For she who should have name changed, yes, it might have been an idea, but frankly it's public now and getting the post deleted would make it obvious anyway smile Anyway, you're only human, and it could happen to any of the "absolutely disgusting" brigade this time tomorrow or next month or in 20 years time, so don't worry about it, your secret is public knowledge safe with us.

thecook Sat 20-Apr-13 23:29:46

fascicle No I have never experienced runners shits. Nor have I heard talk of it in my athletics club. It ain't fucking difficult, yiu run near your house so you can get home quickly if you need a shit.
Now what fucking bit of that don't you understand?

simplesusan Sun 21-Apr-13 00:03:43

This reminded me of an ex bf.
He was out one night, without me, when the urge to poo was overwhelming, so what did he do? Wait until he had walked the 600m home to use the toilet? Oh no. He duly squatted down on some "grassland" and proceeded to poo. Unfortunately for him this "grassland" was actually part of the firestation. Whilst he was in the act, a massive light was switched on shining directly on his arse and a tanoy message told him to stop shitting. He was half way through so couldn't stop. The light continued to shine, the tanoy continued to scream stop, you dirty bastard, and I dumped him not long afterwards.

fascicle Sun 21-Apr-13 10:07:46

thecook Now what fucking bit of that don't you understand?

I don't understand your black and white view, especially given the runners lack of history. I also have no clue why you feel the need to be so aggressive - completely unecessary.

I think we've established that it is more than possible to hold yourself, extreme urge or non, for a toilet in all but the most extremes of circumstances - therefore, pooing in public isn't acceptable.

A nappy bag would sort this out, with a few babywipes, in case of "emergency". Unless you are running starkers (which lends a whole new set of problems) then managing to carry these should not be a problem at all.

Regardless of it happening "only" three times, just one occurance should surely provide a decent person enough reason to carry these small things just in case.

In the case of the OP, the DH admitted that he could have held it but didn't want to end his run. Which is unreasonable.

Oh just buy him a copy of this book

This has totally put me off starting couch to 5k. How revolting.

Even if it has only happened 3 times in 15 years, can't he tuck a nappy sack in his shorts or something? Just so a festering human turd isn't lurking just round the corner?

Skybore Mon 22-Apr-13 12:59:02

I watched the London Marathon with extra vigilance this year following this horrific thread, but if anyone runner DID have an irresistable urge to defacate it was censored by the BBC!

MansView Tue 23-Apr-13 13:54:19

so, if you're in the middle of nowhere what are you supposed to do..?

this is a true story - about 8 years ago I was working away and this time I could only get booked into a manky hotel (well, wasn't that bad !), and I went out for a quick pint after work, I got a lift back and my plan was to nip into the hotel, in the lift to the 7th floor then into my room and have a pee...

great, it was going to plan - except when I went to swipe my card in my door it wouldn't work...I tried a few times but no luck, but I was on the verge of pissing myself..!

I had a piss against the wall (away from my room at least)...well, the thing was - I had to go back downstairs to get my card reset, and I could go down with piss soaked trousers, or not...

what would you have done?

MrsHoarder Tue 23-Apr-13 14:18:51

Held on. As i'm not 3 and have bladder control. If a quick pint out reduces you to not being able to hold on long enough to find a toilet then you probably shouldn't drink.

Bogeyface Tue 23-Apr-13 15:40:03

Yes, held on. But then if a quick drink leaves you pissing in corridors and thinking that its in any way ok then your bladder is the least of your worries hmm

MansView Tue 23-Apr-13 15:42:04

well, I guess that makes you a better people than me then... smile

award yourself a pat on the back !

Urgh, Mansview.

Any normal person would have rushed down to reception, where they no doubt had toilets.

You actually pissed on a wall indoors?!?!

That's one of the single-most disgusting things I've ever heard.

I'd have let out as little as possible into my clothing until the pressure was off, then got changed once I was back in my room.

Bogeyface Tue 23-Apr-13 17:49:15

well, I guess that makes you a better people than me then.

Yes, yes it does

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