To be freaking out about unplanned pregnancy

(27 Posts)
Typicallytypical Fri 12-Apr-13 06:42:54

Short backstory:
I had fertility treatment for dc1, immediately conceived naturally with dc2, had/have pre and post natal depression with both. Dh has had a vasectomy plus the all clear.

We have literally had sex twice this year. My periods are regular as clockwork and I'm 7 days late.
I have taken two tests both negative but all the symptoms match previous pregnancies : low level cramping, sheer exhaustion, crying although very pnd so cry all the time anyway! Can't stop eating and drinking, skin changes, heavy discharge (sorry tmi)
We don't want another baby. I can barely cope with the ones we have now. I just can't imagine termination, now I know my own children it seems barbaric. But my pregnancies were sheer hell physically, emotionally and mentally and I still suffer every day with the aftermath. I don't know what to do, please help.
I can't discuss irl in case I do go with the termination.

Typicallytypical Fri 12-Apr-13 06:44:19

Ps immediately conceived naturally with dc2 unplanned believed that I still had fertility issues. Naive emoticon.

anniroc Fri 12-Apr-13 06:54:24

Sorry for your distress. You do need to get the pregnancy confirmed though - two negative tests sound like a hopeful thing! Fingers crossed you are wrong.

If it is positive then I definitely think you need some counselling to help you feel strong enough to make a decision about your future. Good luck x

everlong Fri 12-Apr-13 07:00:22

Try not to panic.

I would go so far as to say I bet you're not pregnant. Two negative tests are a good sign.

But I would go and see your GP to be a 100% sure.

Typicallytypical Fri 12-Apr-13 07:14:27

Thanks for your replies. I have been doing too much Google research and it appears that people can have several negative results and still be upduffed despite vasectomies. AaaaaaRrrrrrrgggggghhhhhhhh!
I never thought that I'd be praying to be peri menopausal!

PooFlower Fri 12-Apr-13 07:28:31

I was sterilised after dd2 and each time my period has been late I've convinced myself I must be pregnant and had similar symptoms including a prickly sensation in my womb that I get in early pregnancy,
Luckily I wasn't pregnant but it still stresses me out as like yourself I don't want anymore children but don't think I could go through with a termination either.
I've even considered asking for the coil or similar as I feel I can't relax and trust that the sterilisation has worked and am reluctant to have sex with dh.
I think discussing this with your GP would help and I'm going to do the same myself.

I think with two negative tests its unlikely that you are pregnant.

Damash12 Fri 12-Apr-13 07:32:51

I doubt you are pregnant, but that is your starting point. Are you taking any medication for how you feel?

HDEE Fri 12-Apr-13 07:33:25

YABU. I'd place a month's salary on you not being pregnant. You can't possibly be having symptoms of a pregnancy (which are caused by HCG) yet not be producing that HCG in our urine.

katiecubs Fri 12-Apr-13 07:37:00

What HDEE said - it makes no sense so strongly doubt you are pregnant.

Typicallytypical Fri 12-Apr-13 07:40:45

Pooflower that's interesting did you go with extra contraception in the end or have you adapted now?
Damash I'm just taking st John's wort as am breastfeeding, up until recently it worked really well.
Not meaning to drip feed but I suffer extreme ovulation pain and this month there was nothing which at the time I was pleased about.
Hdee how much is your monthly salary? It might come in handy if there's another wee wain to consider :-*

Typicallytypical Fri 12-Apr-13 07:48:36

I have read about false negatives where there hasn't been enough time for the hcg to build up enough to be detected by home tests. I will make early gp appt if possible this morning and hopefully get an answer one way or another. I can't function until I know!

Typicallytypical Fri 12-Apr-13 11:13:27

Hi there just a quick update. I have been to the gp and he advised that yes sometimes the hcg present ideas not at a high enough level to show in a urine test. I am booked in for a blood test next Tuesday didn't think to ask how long it takes to get a result?
Got very distressed in the surgery, have had metallic taste all morning not sure if it's psychological!

everlong Fri 12-Apr-13 11:22:43

I'm no expert ( but have had 5dc ) but I doubt that you would be having symptoms with a negative test.

Typicallytypical Fri 12-Apr-13 11:25:20

Blinking auto fill, not ideas *is.

Neverendingstory1 Fri 12-Apr-13 11:34:08

If you had no ovulation pain then perhaps you didn't ovulate this month which would explain why no period. And may also explain the past fertility problems.

IneedAsockamnesty Fri 12-Apr-13 11:35:39

The HCg blood test takes a couple of hours to be available.

But I would be shocked if by Tuesday if HCg is picked up in a blood test that it wouldn't be picked up by pissing on a stick, HCg increases daily by Tuesday it will be much higher than today and POAS will be able to pick it up as little as 14 days after ovulation.

digerd Fri 12-Apr-13 11:40:53

Stress causes chemicals < don't know the names> in your saliva. My mouth goes dry usually, but your metallic taste is probably that.

If you had no ovulation pain this month, it would appear you did not ovulate.
Perimenopause or Thyroid problems affect your ovulation/periods

Keeping fingures crossed for you.

Typicallytypical Fri 12-Apr-13 11:51:22

Neverending and digerd, that makes perfect sense, despite all my regular periods I had a year of strange cycle /ovulation prior to the fertility treatment to conceive dc1. I have had recent thyroid tests and all clear.

Typicallytypical Fri 12-Apr-13 11:54:19

Oh btw I have bought a stash of pound shop tests to keep me going until Tuesday!

How old are you? I think it's VERY unlikely that you've got strong pregnancy symptoms but not enough HCG to show up on a HPT. Your body is messing with your head.

gobbledegook1 Fri 12-Apr-13 12:09:40

I have always been able to tell I'm pregnant a good week before I can get a positive result so I don't believe a negative nessisarily means your not. I would do a couple more tests a few days apart to be sure especially if you have specific symptoms.

PooFlower Fri 12-Apr-13 12:10:53

Typically, I haven't done anything yet but am seeing my GP next week so will mention my worries.

This months AF was 5 days late and its happened a couple of time in the last year since DD2 was born and I got myself into a right tizz which probably didn't help.

It doesn't help that there isn't a test to check if sterilisation has worked.

Good luck and hopefully your AF will come before Tuesday.

Typicallytypical Fri 12-Apr-13 13:16:54

Northernlurker I am 41 so it's not entirely strange for things to go awry, and I agree that my body could be messing with my head too, gobbledegook I am the same, I have had several pregnancies but only two full term, I have always known way ahead of doing the test and normally have a positive result at 6-7 weeks.
Good luck to you too Pooflower its hard having no control over your body.

Typicallytypical Fri 12-Apr-13 13:23:58

Northernlurker I am 41 so it's not entirely strange for things to go awry, and I agree that my body could be messing with my head too, gobbledegook I am the same, I have had several pregnancies but only two full term, I have always known way ahead of doing the test and normally have a positive result at 6-7 weeks.
Good luck to you too Pooflower its hard having no control over your body.

Typicallytypical Fri 12-Apr-13 13:26:57

Woops sorry for double post

Typicallytypical Mon 15-Apr-13 14:18:44

Update: panic over, aunt flo has arrived, better 10 days late than never. Thanks for your replies and for helping me not to panic! I hope not to have to go through this for the next ten years ...

everlong Mon 15-Apr-13 14:31:00

Cool smile

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