The dog just tried to eat the cat

(77 Posts)
lougle Wed 10-Apr-13 12:36:22

The cat was up out of reach but that dog has a telescopic neck, I swear it. He's like a canine inspector gadget.

TheNebulousBoojum Wed 10-Apr-13 12:38:40

So what happens next?
Is it a frequent occurence?

Branleuse Wed 10-Apr-13 12:38:41

what???? seriously?

can you rehome one of them?

lougle Wed 10-Apr-13 12:40:15

The cat is fine. A little damage to the ear, he just managed to nick it with his tooth before I caught him.

Latara Wed 10-Apr-13 12:42:21

My cat tried to eat a fox recently.

You need to teach the cat some self-defence skills.

After all a cat has four sharp sets of claws and a nasty set of teeth, plus a Universal joint and lots of flexibility... poor dog only has one set of teeth but no claws.

Latara Wed 10-Apr-13 12:43:30

PS. i'm not sure how you actually teach a cat self-defence, it just comes naturally to some cats.

lougle Wed 10-Apr-13 12:44:15

Mmm good point, but this cat is never going to be the self-defence type.

mistlethrush Wed 10-Apr-13 12:46:33

Lougle, cat needs a safe place to go that the dog can't get to - so the otherside of bars that it can get between and the dog can't - stair gate, crate - and or out of reach vertically (with an easy route to get there).

What sparked the incident?

TheNebulousBoojum Wed 10-Apr-13 12:49:43

We had kittens when I was a teenager, and one of the half-grown ones got chased by an alsatian. He tried to escape into our garden, but the dog jumped the gate.
To be met by my cat.
Who slashed his nose and eyes, then as he ran she jumped on his back and continued the assault whilst shrieking at him. The dog jumped the gate with the cat attached. I was very impressed, she'd only ever given the impression that she was bored with parenting before.
The dog avoided all black cats for the rest of his life, just to be on the safe side.
Perhaps your cat either needs a new home or a tough buddy.

lougle Wed 10-Apr-13 12:51:53

Sorry, it was silly of me to start this thread. The cat is in fact a cake. A cake which was wafting it's delicious smell at the dog, sparking his extraordinary neck stretching skills. He managed to graze his tooth along the ear before I saw him. Naughty boy. It just shows that no matter how far back I think the food is, he can reach it.

lougle Wed 10-Apr-13 12:52:45

It really is a cat shaped cat though.

mistlethrush Wed 10-Apr-13 12:56:46

Ah, my dog managed to eat a cheese cake the other day. Silently. Even though she has 2 discs on her collar and had to move a kitchen chair to get to it.


Ahh well, before the Haterz get in, it made me giggle grin

My aunties lab ate a leg of lamb. Not too impressive, except it was frozen!

lougle Wed 10-Apr-13 13:02:21

Thank you for not being cross - I don't have it in me to do these sorts of threads, I'm just too honest! As soon as mistlethrush posted useful advice I felt terrible grin

He does have a telescopic neck though and he's an absolute scavenger.

TheNinjaGooseIsOnAMission Wed 10-Apr-13 13:02:48

grin my mil's boxer dog ate a snowman christmas cake that he'd got from opening a door and the box it was in.

frozen leg of lamb is very impressive!

lougle Wed 10-Apr-13 13:02:52

Beyond limits, a bit of ice isn't going to stop a dog smile

Cheesecake, mmmmm.

lougle Wed 10-Apr-13 13:03:59

When I was young, our GSD stole a big block of cheese from the worktop. I remember my Mum making him finish every bit shock. He didn't do it again for a while...

skratta Wed 10-Apr-13 13:04:16

This made me laugh! My dog was caught eating a lampshade hmm thankfully none swallowed, just destroyed, but I think she would have happily managed it if I'd caught her a minute later.

SizzleSazz Wed 10-Apr-13 13:04:17

I personally loved your thread title (and I am a cat owner wink) grin

TheNebulousBoojum Wed 10-Apr-13 13:04:47

Well, I'm relieved. It didn't seem like your usual persona from the SN boards to be indifferent to your cat and its fear. smile

NicholasTeakozy Wed 10-Apr-13 13:06:24

grin at substituting cat for cake!

When a mate of mine first moved into his new house his cat used to sit right by his front gate watching the world go by. One day one of the local dogs saw her and went for her. About 30 seconds later it ran off down the road. She did this with every dog that attacked her till eventually the dogs used to cross the street when they spotted her. If they were on leads they'd try to drag their owner across. She was hard as nails and an equal opportunities hater.

Didn't stop my toddler eating frozen sprouts the other day either, come to think of it!

lougle Wed 10-Apr-13 13:07:44

It's not my persona. Which I guess I'm relieved about. The dog was in fear, though, I can tell you, when I caught him. I've driven into a town to get that cake tin, 11eggs, 11oz of flour, sugar and butter, and the party is in 24 hours. (thank you, Matilda -I love that word).

recall Wed 10-Apr-13 13:07:49

A cat shaped cake are we talking ?

Booyhoo Wed 10-Apr-13 13:08:20


Softlysoftly Wed 10-Apr-13 13:08:32

I don't really get it?

lougle Wed 10-Apr-13 13:09:28

Yes, it's fab. A cake tin shaped like a cat. I'll try and find it on the net...


SadGiantPanda Wed 10-Apr-13 13:09:35

You should definitely rehome the cat cake. Preferably in my direction.

digerd Wed 10-Apr-13 13:10:35


What a wonderful mother your cat was - fearless and ferocious like a tiger protecting her young. Good for her.

Ullena Wed 10-Apr-13 13:12:26

May I swop my cats for your cake please? grin

lougle Wed 10-Apr-13 13:13:21

Some great stories here. My dog escaped the house a few weeks ago. He ran down the drive and saw a cat across the road on the pavement. He literally went screeching to a halt and they just stared at each other, a bit like those western films where the two men stare at each other before doing their 10 paces. The dog turned and came inside grin

lougle Wed 10-Apr-13 13:14:20

Ullena - my DD is going to be 4 tomorrow. She would be delighted and dismayed in equal measure by your proposal grin

Latara Wed 10-Apr-13 13:15:05

My old cat ate part of a Hedgehog cake, the buttercream icing AND the sponge!

Latara Wed 10-Apr-13 13:15:46

This is better than a Maggie T thread, getting bored already by those.

TheEndTisHere Wed 10-Apr-13 13:16:10

Our old collie went next door and ate a whole gammon joint! when I was young we lived next to a beach he loved BBQs on the beach but we didn't BBQ on the beach.

lougle Wed 10-Apr-13 13:16:42

My dog ate a rubber seahorse shock

oldwomaninashoe Wed 10-Apr-13 13:18:59

My sons dog ate the fish pie I had lovingly prepared for him and his wife, they had to have beans on toast!

MiaowTheCat Wed 10-Apr-13 13:19:01

You're worried about the telescopic neck... try owning a greyhound - the noses extend I'm sure of it.

Aforementioned greyhound has a fondness for (sorry) poo munching and decided the covered cat litter tray resembled an all you can eat buffet - and the fresher the better. Decided to stick pointy nose in the opening while angry kitty was in the middle of doing what angry kittys do in the litter tray - got a face full of claw and feline wrath for her trouble and tried to remove her head, which got stuck, so I had the greyhound running around the living room, covered litter tray on head, angry kitty inside covered litter tray hissing, paw swiping and being very very angry generally at being disturbed mid poo... utter chaos (but blooming hilarious in hindsight).

Greyhound now runs away in fear from the cat if the cat so much as looks at her - an ex racing greyhound being chased BY a small furry cat is amusing.

Ive seen a 10 week old kitten stand off against a full grown black lab/retriever type dog. I think the dog thought he'd found a tasty snack til he got clawed in the face.

I honestly think the kitten would have won that fight even if I hadn't dashed out and scooped him up!

Glad to hear the cat cake survived grin

Latara Wed 10-Apr-13 13:20:25

I'm a bit concerned (seriously now) about the Landlady next door who is moving back in.

She has 3 out-of-control Collies, my cat has scared one of them but i'm worried that the 3 dogs together could hurt my cat.

TheNebulousBoojum Wed 10-Apr-13 13:20:26

This thread is confirming my passion for cats is correct. Not dogs. smile

TheNinjaGooseIsOnAMission Wed 10-Apr-13 13:20:29

my current very daft cat drinks tea from my cup shock that's a very serious crime. My old cat used to climb up the pebbledashing on the outside of the house and you'd see him stuck there level with the upstairs windows grin

lougle Wed 10-Apr-13 13:22:05

I'm going to use jam to glue the ear flap back on before covering the cake. I'm still taking the cake to the party <defiant glare> blush

cornygrigio Wed 10-Apr-13 13:24:11

We had a cat that ate spiders and daddy long legs. We should have hired her out.

lougle Wed 10-Apr-13 13:24:38

I've got 4 chicks in a brooder at the moment. It's too cold for them to go out yet. The dog is doing a good impression of an 'am I bovvered' face whenever I check their water. He isn't convincing me that they'd survive a meet, though hmm

Latara Wed 10-Apr-13 13:25:11

Maybe alter the cake so it's a one-eared cat cake...

Latara Wed 10-Apr-13 13:26:19

Right now my cat is waiting outside for Sparrows to fly into her mouth.

Ullena Wed 10-Apr-13 13:32:43

Why will no one take these evil cats and replace them with cake ?


Happy Birthday to Little Lougle!

mistlethrush Wed 10-Apr-13 13:35:10

My dog would like to sample my wine glass, but I keep too close an eye on it for her to have managed that yet. My lurcher has an extending neck, very long nose, and jump jet vertical capabilities...

Lueji Wed 10-Apr-13 14:11:16

I'd still go with re-homing the cat.
I have a lovely place, btw. smile
And we like cake too.

Ullena Wed 10-Apr-13 14:15:35

You can have my cats, Lueji.

PolterGooseLaidAChocolateEgg Wed 10-Apr-13 14:19:55

lougle have you been on the wine already? grin

Lueji Wed 10-Apr-13 14:26:09

Ullena, only if they are cake cats. smile

D0G Wed 10-Apr-13 14:27:56

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ReluctantBeing Wed 10-Apr-13 14:28:10

This thread has the funniest use of drip-feeding!

MartyrStewart Wed 10-Apr-13 14:29:03

I swear my GSD is part anteater. He has a very long flexible nose. And proper 'fingers' confused

Lueji Wed 10-Apr-13 14:33:57

If everything else fails, try to make it into this cake

SlumberingDormouse Wed 10-Apr-13 14:37:45

The very greedy Dalmatian we had when I was little once ate an entire turkey followed by an entire Christmas pudding. He was drunk and swaying for days! grin

FeijoaVodkaAndCheezels Wed 10-Apr-13 14:38:33


Ullena Wed 10-Apr-13 14:38:52

Lueji they have certainly eaten plenty of cake in their time thieving little furballs, so they may actually count as part cake now?


freddiefrog Wed 10-Apr-13 15:02:28

Mine ate a whole bag of satsumas that has just arrived in my Tesco delivery a little white ago. String bag, little stickers, peel and all

The results were pretty epic.

He also ate a bag of frozen peas on Sunday

He wouldn't dare attack the cat though, I think she's exersiced mind control over him

I think most cats can see off a single dog as long as they aren't very infirm or cornered. I remeber seeing our cat from a few decades ago deal with next doors setter. Dog was as soft as a brush and padded up to Jess (yes he was black and white) with goofy expression. Jess (tough born on a farm cat) swelled up hugely, let out a shriek and whacked Goofy across the nose before fleeing. Poor dog was distraught.
Likewise most dogs can see off a cake cat. grin

Ezza1 Wed 10-Apr-13 15:18:04

My cat drank quite a bit of Baileys one Christmas Day before we noticed shock He was quite the groggy moggy for the rest of the day.

lougle Wed 10-Apr-13 18:15:01

Ok, well it's taken all day. But I unveil the nearly-eaten-by-the-dog cat:

The one that got away

SamuelWestsMistress Wed 10-Apr-13 19:02:17

My dogs have always known better than to try and piss off the cats. Hissy spitty sharp buggers that make them bleed!

ThreadWorms Wed 10-Apr-13 19:12:19

That's one fab cake lougle. You'd never know it nearly lost an ear grin.

My GSD once ate a whole large tub of vaseline. It pooed it out all up the 'back passage' so to speak. I got the hose out and went to hose it away, but it didn't disperse - I just ended up making a rather impressive looking vaseline and poo swiss roll [belugh]. grin

MiaowTheCat Wed 10-Apr-13 19:18:04

By the way - the aforementioned feline who thinks she's Rambo and has the dogs terrified... is at LEAST 14 years old and a leg short of a full pack - so should really fall under the infirm category and hasn't got the memo.

Both dogs will move when she orders them to, she has a sofa of her own and has them well and truly trained.

lougle Wed 10-Apr-13 19:18:20

Icing covers a multitude of sins, worms wink

ThreadWorms Wed 10-Apr-13 19:21:49

I've been known to 'plug' gaps with butter icing. Can you tell baking is not my forte? Happy birthday to your DD, I hope she has a lovely day smile.

lougle Wed 10-Apr-13 19:23:14

Thanks grin

Lucyellensmum95 Wed 10-Apr-13 19:29:49

One day, I had just taken the sunday joint out of the oven, DP had to nip round to my mums for something and my friend phoned. All of a sudden in came the dog with the whole joint in his mouth shock. I did the unthinkable - run it under the tap quick and carved it before DP got back grin I told him afterwards, he wasn't best pleased!

lougle Wed 10-Apr-13 19:37:13

Hahaahha the only thing you can do, Lucyellensmum <eyes suspiciously perfect cat's ear>

Lueji Wed 10-Apr-13 19:37:18

If I was the dog I would have gone for it too.

TheNinjaGooseIsOnAMission Thu 11-Apr-13 11:56:50

happy birthday to your dd, hope she likes the cake grin

lougle Fri 12-Apr-13 21:43:22

Thank you grin

She loved the cake and nobody noticed the grazed ear. The cat has been disemboweled now. Poor thing, it never stood a chance sad

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