AIBU about how much to pay for my dance costume?

(36 Posts)
MixedBerries Wed 10-Apr-13 11:06:57

Really not sure about this. It's not a serious matter, nor is it keeping me awake at night but just wondering what everyone else thinks...

I'm part of a dance group and we're performing at a festival in July. At first, the festival date clashed with my family's holiday so I said I couldn't perform with them. Our teacher went ahead and bought costumes for the group which cost £40 each in the shop and so this is what she charged the others.

The festival date has now been moved which means I CAN perform after all. Teacher said this was fine if I could find the same costume elsewhere as the shop she bought from had sold out. I found the costume (dress) on ebay and bought it for £9.99 myself. The teacher is now asking me to pay her £30 as everyone else had to pay £40 for theirs and it's not fair mine only cost me £9.99.

Is she BU to ask me to give her £30 to make up the difference? Or should the rest of the group just have to live with the fact I bought mine cheaper? I could pay it just for the sake of harmony but I'm wondering about the principle.

LIZS Wed 10-Apr-13 11:09:40

If you sourced and bought it , how does she know how much you paid. You don't owe her for it .

Wommer Wed 10-Apr-13 11:12:18

She's being ridiculous and yandbu!
The only possible reasoning I can think of is that all of the costumes cost her around a tenner each and there are other expenses up to about £30 which she's lumped under the same heading....

Can you ask her exactly what she's going to do with the £30?
If its just going in her back pocket (although don't expect her to actually say that) then no absolutely not!
If its for other stuff (wracking brain here!) make up, hair stuff, tights (?!!), mini bus hire? And she can specify then yes maybe.

Kormachameleon Wed 10-Apr-13 11:12:22

I would laugh in her face

Until she got the message

Cheeky mare

MixedBerries Wed 10-Apr-13 11:12:58

Thanks LIZS. She knows what I paid as I showed it to her online just to check it was exactly the same as the others. She saw the price then. The others don't know how much it cost though.

HoHoHoNoYouDont Wed 10-Apr-13 11:14:19

shock Words almost fail me at the cheek of this woman.

PLEASE promise me you will not pay her the money.

MixedBerries Wed 10-Apr-13 11:28:29

Hmmm. So far it's a consensus. I'm just reluctant to rock the boat as she's a nice lady, does not make much money through teaching us (although I think she enjoys it more than most of us) and we live in a fairly small community where grudges last a long time!

annh Wed 10-Apr-13 11:30:50

Have you asked her what she is planning to do with the £30? And why didn't she buy everyone's costume from Ebay as the price is so much better?

LIZS Wed 10-Apr-13 11:31:30

or did she and pocket the dfference ?

edwardsmum11 Wed 10-Apr-13 11:33:37

I wonder if she pocketed the extra and got it for same price as yours. I wouldn't give her the difference.

MixedBerries Wed 10-Apr-13 11:35:23

She's just going to pocket the difference to make it fair to the others as far as I know. There are no other costs involved.

She was adamant that she charged others £40 because that's exactly what they cost in the shop. I can't verify this but I believe her.

I guess she didn't get them all on ebay as the one I bought is a one-off sale- they weren't abundant or in many different sizes as would have been needed for the whole group.

HazleNutt Wed 10-Apr-13 11:38:33

Huh? Why on earth would YOU pay HER the difference? How is it even her business how much you paid for the costume?

BackforGood Wed 10-Apr-13 11:41:27

Unbelieveable ! Apart from anything else, no-one else need know yours was cheaper, but even if it was, it's irrelevant. She asked you to get the costume, which you did. Would she have been reimbursing you if you'd had to pay out £50 ? I could sort of understand her trying it on if she'd got the costume for you, but she didn't, so there's no 'case' to answer.

kinkyfuckery Wed 10-Apr-13 11:42:57

What a cheeky cow. Unless the £30 involves other costs, tell her to do one!


surely the others paid her "£40 to cover the cost of buying it

you bought your own costume so you paid the cost of buying it

the woman is a complete and utter imbecile!

Angelico Wed 10-Apr-13 11:48:27

Bonkers. YANBU. She is BVVVVU.

CheeseandPickledOnion Wed 10-Apr-13 11:48:57

YANBU. WTF? Their costumes cost £40 so they paid £40. You found yours for £10, so you pay £10. Why on earth would you be giving her £30? Fucking nonsense.

MummytoKatie Wed 10-Apr-13 12:03:29

Presumably your costume is second hand whilst theirs is all brand new so you are not paying for the same thing anyway?

Floggingmolly Wed 10-Apr-13 12:05:38

Nut case!!! You saved the money, how would handing it over to her make it "fair" to everybody else? That's three year old logic.

LadyBeagleEyes Wed 10-Apr-13 12:08:14

Why on earth would you give her £30, who would this be fair for?

MammaTJ Wed 10-Apr-13 12:10:29

Ask her if she would be giving you £20 if yours was £60. I doubt very much if she would.

CwtchesAndCuddles Wed 10-Apr-13 12:11:59

There is no way on earth I would be giving her the money!

She is bonkers..............

Floggingmolly Wed 10-Apr-13 12:13:36

Good point, Mamma! That would be just as "fair".

zzzzz Wed 10-Apr-13 12:16:23

The answer is "no" followed swiftly by "are you insane?"

Why would you do that?

What would she do with your £30?

MixedBerries Wed 10-Apr-13 12:18:45

That IS a very good point MammaTJ. Ok. I'm decided. Just have to think about how to approach it now. Thanks everyone.

MummytoKatie Wed 10-Apr-13 12:29:24

You could suggest you bring in some chocs or something for backstage if you wanted to be nice......

Of course then the others will know that you got your costume much cheaper and she may not want that....

RougePygmy Wed 10-Apr-13 13:07:32

She is not that nice if she is planning on pocketing £30 of your money...

She can hardly talk about fairness if she is trying to con money out of you.

zzzzz Wed 10-Apr-13 13:12:37

I'd wait and let her bring it up again and then just say "goodness, I thought you were joking! Of course I can't give you £30 of my money because my dress was cheaper than the ones you bought."

MammaTJ Wed 10-Apr-13 13:46:11

Actually, just worked out your approach.

Tell her you had to start a case against the person you were buying from on ebay because they failed to send it to you. (Or it was fault and you had to send it back, depending whether she knew you had recieved it or not) You have now had to order one from another supplier, unfortunatly this has cost a great deal more. She will be ok to cover the difference won't she? When can you pay me dance teacher?

MammaTJ Wed 10-Apr-13 13:47:07

fault faulty

unfortunatly unfortunately

Crinkle77 Wed 10-Apr-13 13:49:15

YANBU how dare she ask you for the £30 and then pocket the difference for herself. You could say that you are happy to give a donation to charity and see what she says

RubyGates Wed 10-Apr-13 13:51:48

No way.

If I were the others I'd be a bit miffed that she hadn't done her homework before sourcing them for £40. No, you don't give her the difference. She did nothing to help you with the costume. confused

MixedBerries Wed 10-Apr-13 14:46:56

Some great ideas!

Pixieonthemoor Wed 10-Apr-13 14:48:44

That's just so weird and bonkers!! If she was trying to make it a bit more fair on the others surely she would be splitting the £30 between the rest of the dance troupe not pocketing it herself!! How on earth is that fair??

MixedBerries Wed 10-Apr-13 21:22:34

Ok. Thanks so much everyone who replied. I have an approach in mind and I'll let you know how it goes.

quoteunquote Wed 10-Apr-13 21:41:01

Bonkers, unless she charges £30 conformation of matching outfit fee.

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