my dh has changed my screen saver photo on my phone aibu to be annoyed?

(54 Posts)
chocoholic05 Wed 10-Apr-13 10:30:55

I have a new phone. my screen saver photos have always included my dh and my boys always. However this week I got round to adding a new screen saver photo and I it was a photo of my 2 boys looking very happy during a family day out at a farm last week. smile A lovely photo. I didn't leave dh out out of spite or any reason at all its just a nice photo we both said we love. Anyway I came down this morning and discovered the screen saver photo has been changed to a photo with dh in it too. It's not even a nice photo he looks grumpy in it. Not one I would have chosen. I'm annoyed about it aibu?

phantomhairpuller Wed 10-Apr-13 10:36:10

A bit, yes. But then so is your DH. It's all a tad childish IMO confused

Branleuse Wed 10-Apr-13 10:38:10

change it back

YouTheCat Wed 10-Apr-13 10:38:29

I'd be pissed off too. I think tinkering (unasked) with someone's phone is akin to going in their bag without asking and bloody rude.

Change his screen saver to a picture of your middle finger. grin

clam Wed 10-Apr-13 10:39:48

Well, leaving aside the fact that my dh wouldn't have a clue how to change a screen saver photo, yes, I'd be hacked off too. I'd change it straight back, on principle.

chocoholic05 Wed 10-Apr-13 10:41:51

yes I think I will! Dh is at work so I've not spoken to him about it yet.

Hopasholic Wed 10-Apr-13 10:43:47

I'd download a picture of Brad Pitt and have that as my screen saver for when he returns from work grin

He is being an absolute childish arse so I'd treat him in the same manner!

CajaDeLaMemoria Wed 10-Apr-13 10:43:49

Maybe he's a lot more upset to be left off than you/he realises?

He shouldn't have changed your background, granted, but perhaps it's worth finding a nice picture of all of them, rather than leaving him out?

It is petty, but I can also see why it'd hurt a bit to be left out, even if it felt too stupid to talk about. Maybe he thought changing it back was preferable to starting a conversation and feeling like an idiot?

Hopasholic Wed 10-Apr-13 10:45:48

But he's a grown man Caja

harleyd Wed 10-Apr-13 10:46:08

change it back and tell him to grow up

PregnantPain Wed 10-Apr-13 10:46:27

So what if he is upset, it is her phone and he is being childish. Both my wallpaper and screensaver is just DD at the moment, DP wouldn't even think to comment on this either way, it is up to me.

Booyhoo Wed 10-Apr-13 10:46:57

what age is he?

is he jealous of your children?

what a dick.

KarmaBitch Wed 10-Apr-13 10:47:09

I wouldn't make a huge deal of it tbh. I'd just change it back and in passing just mention 'Oh, any particular reason you changed the screen saver? I've changed it back to the original one.

He's not one of those who will also go through your every text, is he?

squeakytoy Wed 10-Apr-13 10:48:47

ffs.. its a phone screensaver... grips needed all round here I would say! I dont even know what my husband has as his... and mine alternates between a half naked shot of Johnny Depp or a pic of my dog usually...

chocoholic05 Wed 10-Apr-13 10:51:22

he's 43 I didn't think he was jealous of our children. It's not a nice photo of the boys either they're somewhere behind dh npt looking at the camera looking cold and not happy at all

chocoholic05 Wed 10-Apr-13 10:52:12

lol squeaky toy!

Well, it is childish of him. But if you really have always had a picture of all of you, then maybe he has associated that with feeling good, and feels hurt for reasons that he probably can't explain very well. Hence swapping it to one which meets your previous criteria, but has him looking grumpy.

I'm guessing he's not someone who finds it easy to talk about emotions?

Booyhoo Wed 10-Apr-13 10:56:34

just change it back and say "leave my phone alone"

PinkCanary Wed 10-Apr-13 10:56:44

My DH likes to change my screen saver to things I'm petrified of, then waits patiently for my hysterical reaction once I realise...

chocoholic05 Wed 10-Apr-13 10:58:05

but does it matter? I didn't intend any malice it was just a nice photo end of and I'm annoyed about the intrusion more than anything really

chocoholic05 Wed 10-Apr-13 10:58:58

responding to mum in Scotland btw!

chocoholic05 Wed 10-Apr-13 11:07:42

just had another look at the photo. I stand corrected dc are gathered up at the front of him looking cold tired and fed up and sucking their thumbs dh is also looking cold and fed up. So not a nice photo imo

KellyElly Wed 10-Apr-13 11:09:08

I wouldn't be annoyed I would just think it was a bit weird. Is he a bit insecure?

Booyhoo Wed 10-Apr-13 11:10:15

you still haven't changed it?

belfastbigmillie Wed 10-Apr-13 11:11:30

Put one on of a naked fireman smile

chocoholic05 Wed 10-Apr-13 11:12:48

no cause I'm mums netting on my phone! I'm taking the boys to the playground soon will do it later or maybe at the playground?

Branleuse Wed 10-Apr-13 11:13:58

its definitely a sign of feeling insecure.

No, I'd be annoyed too. I'm just trying to think why he might have done it. If my DH decided to change any settings on my phone I'd be well pissed off!

Hulababy Wed 10-Apr-13 11:17:35

I'd change it back.

Can't imagine DH ever doing anything like that tbh. My screen saver is often just DD, rarely has me or Dh on.

Is your Dh usually so insecure?

NoelHeadbands Wed 10-Apr-13 11:17:49

I think that's weird.

My screensaver varies between Gerard Butler semi naked and Gerard Butler fully clothed, dh knows its more than his life is worth better than to even think about changing it.

There are three ways to play this now, either leave it, change it, or take a picture of yourself with a really angry face or flipping him off and put it as his screensaver.

MayTheOddsBeEverInYourFavour Wed 10-Apr-13 11:21:28

He is being weird and a bit pathetic

Even if he does have an issue it's still really rude to just change it without asking you

madonnawhore Wed 10-Apr-13 11:21:29

Messing around with your phone behind your back is not on IMO. Straying into invasion of privacy territory.

Also, what is the screensaver on his phone? Is it a pic of you?

Booyhoo Wed 10-Apr-13 11:21:32

it takes 10 seconds to change back. you need to plan it? confused

chocoholic05 Wed 10-Apr-13 11:23:40

I need to find it! I've taken loads of photos since then! I may even choose a different one entirely smile

kinkyfuckery Wed 10-Apr-13 11:25:41

Wow, why so serious? Has he maybe just done it for a laugh? Change it to something funny, it could be a fun little battle you get going on wink

Booyhoo Wed 10-Apr-13 11:26:21

he wouldn't have deleted the one of just the boys would he?

what would he do if you had one of just you on it?

All a bit weird on both sides. He shouldn't be fiddling with your phone and I would ask him why he changed it - he might be feeling left out. But, like a PP said, grips are needed all 'round. It's a pic on a phone. Mine is my Dog, who I only occasionally love more than DH... His is also of the Dog, who he always loves more than me. I don't care. it's just a phone FGS.

dothraki Wed 10-Apr-13 11:39:46

belfast grin

Hopasholic Wed 10-Apr-13 12:48:12

I do think it's out of order & it's an invasion of privacy. I'd be putting a pass code on my phone. I bet he's gone through your phone, he must have in order to find a picture of him. If he's that insecure you can bet your life he's gone through your text messages too.

bbface Wed 10-Apr-13 12:52:39

You are married and have children???? This sounds so childish!!

BoneyBackJefferson Wed 10-Apr-13 12:54:09

Are you sure that he has changed it and its not just the phone going funny?

chocoholic05 Wed 10-Apr-13 13:33:20

i do have a pin number on my phone to stop my boys from going into it not my dh. He has worked out my pin number twice now. The first time I changed it. He said to me you're changed your password haven't you. I said yes how did you know and he said because I've tried the old number and it didn't work! shock

Fairylea Wed 10-Apr-13 13:36:55

You're lucky you're not married to my dh.

He regularly surprises me with a screen shot of his willy when I go to look at my phone having set it himself as a surprise.... immature but amusing I guess. I do have a lock on my phone so it's not as if anyone can see it.

MiaowTheCat Wed 10-Apr-13 13:39:50

Just change his phone operating language to a random one - if it doesn't use the standard alphabet so it's harder to guess words to change it back - all the better.

KellyElly Wed 10-Apr-13 13:41:56

He has worked out my pin number twice now. The first time I changed it. He said to me you're changed your password haven't you. I said yes how did you know and he said because I've tried the old number and it didn't work! That's quite alarming behaviour grin

allchocolatedout Wed 10-Apr-13 13:46:38

Recently dh changed mine to a picture of his naked arse. But not only the screensaver but also the background and the lock screen photo. Every time i thought i had got rid of it, there it was!

Do you think your dh meant it as a joke, is in a grumpy photo on purpose? That is all i can think of tbh

ladyjadie Wed 10-Apr-13 13:51:38

Change the picture to one of you holding a bit of paper saying 'Bugger Off'

Change your pin to something totally random and change the lock screen to a pic of you sticking your finger up/tongue out or just a sign saying 'gutted'


I would so change it to a picture of a buff semi naked man, even though that would usually be the last screen saver I'd choose.

CockyFox Wed 10-Apr-13 14:07:28

That would annoy me.
That said it is a joke in our family whenever a phone is left unattended to change the background photo to one of a certain 70s popstar. I won't say who because it could out me but it is very funny.

chocoholic05 Wed 10-Apr-13 15:15:49

oh dear I think I should have checked the facts first. My 7 year old ds has just admitted to doing it! blush

KellyElly Wed 10-Apr-13 15:24:16

hahahahhahahah! How did they know your password?!

Booyhoo Wed 10-Apr-13 15:29:42


Yeah ok

MsBella Wed 10-Apr-13 15:30:42

He's being ridiculous!

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