Borrowing and lending dh can't ever get it right.

(56 Posts)
Gorjuss Tue 09-Apr-13 19:11:15

My dh continues to use the expression borrow and lend the wrong way round, claiming in front of dds that it doesn't make a difference and I am being awkward by pointing it out.

moondog Tue 09-Apr-13 19:12:21

It is one of those things that makes you want to beat people repeatedly around the head isn't it?
In fairness, in many languages, the word is the same fro both.

whois Tue 09-Apr-13 19:12:21

You just can't learn some people

[cant stand mix up of lend/borrow and teach/learn]

Snorbs Tue 09-Apr-13 19:13:34

It's itch/scratch that drives me bonkers.

Your poor DH.

UptoapointLordCopper Tue 09-Apr-13 19:19:05

In my language borrow and lend are the same - you use an equivalent of "to" or "from" to distinguish. But pah! I still get it right in English ALL the time. << smug >> On the other hand we don't distinguish "he" or "she". And I get that wrong in English all the time, which is confusing for the listener. blush

HotCrossPun Tue 09-Apr-13 19:23:24

So your DH says ''I will borrow you some money'' instead of ''I will lend you some money''?

kinkyfuckery Tue 09-Apr-13 19:24:13

Alot of people get it wrong. Don't loose your temper with him.

ParadiseChick Tue 09-Apr-13 19:28:40

grin at alot!!

I can't stand this. That'll learn ye!

HollyBerryBush Tue 09-Apr-13 19:30:07

^learn me' - that's another one that makes me want to bludgeon

zwischenzug Tue 09-Apr-13 19:32:57

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Gorjuss Tue 09-Apr-13 19:33:13

Yeah "borrow me". I know exactly what he means it and I don't get mad over him saying it more so because he refuses to accept they mean different things.

carlywurly Tue 09-Apr-13 19:33:42

I don't like "I was sat" but appear to be fighting a losing battle with that one.

HollyBerryBush Tue 09-Apr-13 19:34:01

Get him a dictionary for Christmas

Gorjuss Tue 09-Apr-13 19:39:19

Good idea hollyberry he will have something to put his cup of tea on.

ecclesvet Tue 09-Apr-13 19:40:11

I always get confused which one the 'creditor' is.

MsVestibule Tue 09-Apr-13 19:44:42

YANBU. I used to pull people up on this at work. The conversation would go like this:

Clearly Uneducated Colleague (even if they had a degree): Can you borrow me a ruler?
Me: No, but I can lend one to you, if you like.

I was really popular.

ecclesvet I used to but then I realised that I was never in any doubt about which one was the "debtor". So I just remember that the creditor is the other one.

Did you do that thing, too, MsV where someone says, "Can I borrow a tissue?" and you say, "No, but I'll give you one if you like." That's not annoying either.

MsVestibule Tue 09-Apr-13 20:07:58

TheSurgeonsMate Oh no, I wouldn't do that. I do set myself some limitations on the 'being irritating' scale.

Bunbaker Tue 09-Apr-13 20:12:14

I hate it. It makes people sound thick and uneducated. I didn't realise that borrow and lend are the same word in some other languages though.

Viviennemary Tue 09-Apr-13 20:15:53

I don't think it really matters. And it's even more confusing if it's the same word in other languages. But would it help to say the person who owns the object is doing the lending and the person who receives the object is doing the borrowing. And in any case I think it's a bit of a regional thing. It's like a double negative. Used in some regions more than others. That's my theory anyway. I've no proof. grin

ILikeBirds Tue 09-Apr-13 20:15:53

It's reasonably common to both where I grew up and where I live now but drives me insane.

"Remember me to" is another one that irritates. As in

Person A: I'm going to see Claire tonight
Person B: Remember me to her

(Translation: say hello from me)

UptoapointLordCopper Tue 09-Apr-13 20:16:52

Sometimes you do carry over idiosyncrasies from other languages. For eg (showing off now wink) in Japanese I think you don't distinguish the definite and indefinite article, so some Japanese English speakers find it hard to use them correctly in English. Some Chinese speakers also sometimes don't distinguish tenses because there are no such things in Chinese.

I love these kinds of things. smile

UptoapointLordCopper Tue 09-Apr-13 20:17:38

"Remember me to" - Scarborough Fair. smile

AnythingNotEverything Tue 09-Apr-13 20:17:58

Where I lie (oop North) people are always getting these words mixed up.

Kids are especially afflicted with the won/beat mix up. Makes me twitch.

ILikeBirds Tue 09-Apr-13 20:23:38

The OH (not native English speaker) always says "I've seen that more times"

Five years of me replying "More times than what?" and he still hasn't grasped that the word he needs is many :-)

greenandcabbagelooking Tue 09-Apr-13 20:32:32

I hate it when people say "my sister got it me". That makes no sense.

I also hate "I'm going toilet".

Chiponshouldermom Tue 09-Apr-13 20:51:33

Never a borrower nor a lender be! Gorjuss YABUR! Only joking! You are a wordsmith he is clearly not the brains of your relationship. Enjoy WOMAN MUMMY POWER

Chiponshouldermom Tue 09-Apr-13 20:52:31

It's like T U R T L E power but M U M M Y power

Hopasholic Tue 09-Apr-13 20:59:52

Dare I say it's a man thing?

My DH can't get it right and neither could my Ddb. On the other hand my two DS's have had it drilled into them so they get it right!

Viviennemary Tue 09-Apr-13 21:06:46

Remember me to one who lives there. She once was a true love of mine.

EggsEggSplat Tue 09-Apr-13 21:09:04

Borrow/lend, teach/learn, 'I was sat', 'I was laying' - all make me twitch. But I think some of it is regional usage as well as just bad grammar.

(sidetrack: Uptoapointlordcopper - there are $no articles at all - definite or indefinite- in Japanese, or Chinese, or Korean etc, so it is very hard for them to get the hang of usage. Also no plurals as we know them in any of those languages, and no verbs with tenses in Chinese. Makes it easier for Europeans to learn those languages, though there are other difficulties...)

UptoapointLordCopper Tue 09-Apr-13 21:12:49

What do you call the "this" and "that"? We have them in Japanese and Chinese. But definitely no "a" and "the".

ImpatientOne Tue 09-Apr-13 21:16:11

Yes Snorbs I completely agree on the itch/scratch one it drives me nuts grin

My poor DH really gets a tough ride as English is his second language but I don't let him get away with much! blush

EggsEggSplat Tue 09-Apr-13 21:38:26

Uptoapointlordcopper - I think this and that are demonstrative adjectives. Much more similar, except that in Japanese there is that third one, ano/are etc = 'that one over there' etc.

UptoapointLordCopper Tue 09-Apr-13 21:50:32

Thank you eggs. Isn't it marvellous? Further display of language trivia: in Malay/indonesian you have two "we" - one including the listener and one excluding.

EggsEggSplat Tue 09-Apr-13 21:54:49

I can see that would be quite a useful distinction. I definitely think the you singular v you plural thing (a la French & German) could be handy too, though having said that, the ability to be vague also has its attractions, as I have learnt from Japanese.

When I rule the world, I might have to invent a new world language, way better than Esperanto, incorporating all these interesting/quirky/useful things.

drjohnsonscat Tue 09-Apr-13 22:00:32

smile at "remember me to the one who lives there"...takes me back to the 80s in my teenage bedroom listening to S&G - all in all a very 80s themed day.

English doesn't need a tu/vous thing - I struggle with it in French. But we do need a he/she/it word.

UptoapointLordCopper Tue 09-Apr-13 22:02:38

Apparently there is a language which doesn't do left and right - just north south east west! Then you can be very specific about directions. "There are some Lego pieces south of the east-facing sofa". grin

Hechan Tue 09-Apr-13 22:03:27

I am learning Irish. Apparently there are 2 different verbs for "to be", one for normal use and one for habitual use. The teacher explained the latter was the equivalent of the English "do you be", as in, "do you be going running every Friday?".

Can't say I remember learning that construction at school.

UptoapointLordCopper Tue 09-Apr-13 22:03:29

You can use "they" for he/she, according to my dictionary, but it calls it "slang".

Hechan Tue 09-Apr-13 22:04:57

My kids have learned at school that you plural in English is yous.

UptoapointLordCopper Tue 09-Apr-13 22:06:39

"yous" shock

Hechan Tue 09-Apr-13 22:08:47

I know. Tbf it's not taught as part of English, but as the English translation of the Irish, if you see what I mean.

TooManyDicksOnTheDancefloor Tue 09-Apr-13 22:15:28

Where I live, also up North, kids seem to think the past tense of beat is bet. They'll say things like 'remember last season when Leeds bet Sheffield Wednesday'. They also think the past tense of treat is tret, as in ' last night I tret missen to fish and chips'. Apparently missen means myself. It doesn't make me angry though, I love the local dialect.

Apileofballyhoo Tue 09-Apr-13 22:22:30

There really isn't any equivalent in English for the Irish habitual present tense - it is the present tense of 'I used to' or 'I would have' as opposed to the present tense of 'I was'. Hard to explain!

There is no word for 'yes' or 'no' in Irish.

steppemum Tue 09-Apr-13 22:22:30

how about rent and let?

I am renting my house, no you aren't if you were renting it you would be paying a LL money per month. You are LETTING it.

Or even bring and take.
At home child says 'I will bring it to school tomorrow'

No you won't, you will TAKE it to school and then BRING it home again.
dh cannot get this one right, but to be fair English is one of 5 languages he speaks, and it is pretty good, he can correct my grammar!

steppemum Tue 09-Apr-13 22:24:52

In Indonesian the word for no is hardly ever used.

If possible you use another phrase like

yes - but mean no
that's nice - means no
maybe tomorrow - means no
etc etc

but my favourite, used in pretty much every context is - Not Yet!

Bunbaker Wed 10-Apr-13 07:37:53

When I first moved to Leeds I was confused when people said "while" instead of "until" - he won't be back while 3.

AnyoneforTurps Wed 10-Apr-13 08:16:16

"Remember me to" is perfectly correct, just slightly old-fashioned.

OP YANBU though - infuriating.

Steppemum - interesting! As I understand it, in Welsh you don't say Yes, but just confirm the point asked. "Can you swim?" "I can." Can any Welsh speakers confirm this?

ILikeBirds Wed 10-Apr-13 09:52:54

Logically though you can only remember things yourself, if you want someone else to remember something you remind them. It's why it sounds so wrong to me even if it has historical usage.

lashingsofbingeinghere Wed 10-Apr-13 09:57:19

Back in the North West, us kids would say "Give us a lend of your bike."

But I still know the difference between lend and borrow <sniffs>.

rtc8608 Wed 10-Apr-13 10:00:59

The ultimate annoying phrase when I was at school - 'Can I lend a pen'!

AnyoneforTurps Wed 10-Apr-13 10:18:17

Logically though you can only remember things yourself

We tend to use it more like that but actually it can mean "call to mind" more generally.

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