How often do you change your pants?

(476 Posts)
Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 20:41:35

By popular request.

I have a clipboard.

And a pencil.

Every day here.

foxache Sun 31-Mar-13 20:42:28

I'm reporting this thread.

landofsoapandglory Sun 31-Mar-13 20:43:16

Everyday here too.

Do people really do it less frequently?

Thurlow Sun 31-Mar-13 20:43:38

grin

littlemissbunny Sun 31-Mar-13 20:44:19

I only change mine once a week!

Is that not normal confused

ZipItShrimpy Sun 31-Mar-13 20:44:21

Everyday at least. Sometimes twice if I'm going out at night.

Anything less is rank.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 20:44:51

shock @ foxache.

It's in the public interest!

BumpingFuglies Sun 31-Mar-13 20:45:02

I'm reporting this too. Discusting. The word "pants" in the thread title. I'm sorry, can't seem to catch my breath.

AnyoneforTurps Sun 31-Mar-13 20:45:17

I second ZipIt.

FattyMcChubster Sun 31-Mar-13 20:45:21

New pair in morning, new pair for bed.
Who doesn't change at least daily?!

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 20:45:42

<hangs head in shame>

Lara2 Sun 31-Mar-13 20:45:58

Everyday and twice if I'm going out.
Do people really do it less???! shock

ENormaSnob Sun 31-Mar-13 20:46:15

By pants do you mean knickers or trousers?

TheBuskersDog Sun 31-Mar-13 20:46:17

Twice a year, do it on the days the clocks change so I don't forget.

Am feeling lovely and fresh todayshock

I don't wear pants. It's good to let the air circulate around your nether regions. If it was good enough for Elizabeth 1 then it's good enough for me.
Of course, sometimes the stress incontinence can cause a little distress, but I've found that pretending you have spilled a cup of tea usually gets you off the hook.
wink

catgirl1976 Sun 31-Mar-13 20:46:38

I don't wear pants.

Saves on the laundry

WhereMyMilk Sun 31-Mar-13 20:46:43

At least once daily.

Twice if bit sweaty/gone swimming etc.

Anything less than daily is <boak>

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 20:46:47

Same as Lara. Please don't say that's wrong. <worries>

LaQueen Sun 31-Mar-13 20:46:53

Daily, often twice...

Please tell me everyone is the same, they are, aren't they? Please...please...

OhDearieDearieMe Sun 31-Mar-13 20:47:07

When they walk down to the washing machine of their own accord. Then it's time.

grin

bedmonster Sun 31-Mar-13 20:47:31

I change mostly twice a day. Fresh pair in the morning after shower, obviously, and a clean pair on to lounge about it bed after a shower. Take them off and stick in the basket before I go to sleep though, can't wear a stitch in bed!

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 20:47:56

Is anyone going to admit to anything less than daily? Really?

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 20:48:37

Knickers

MooMooSkit Sun 31-Mar-13 20:48:46

Twice a day here to, once in the morning, once after my shower/bath. My brother admitted when he was a teenager he'd make a pair last a week and turn them inside out. shock

Almostfifty Sun 31-Mar-13 20:48:54

Every time I have a bath or shower. I shower every morning and sometimes bathe as well, especially if I'm going out.

I don't just change my pants, I change my bra as well... smile

catgirl1976 Sun 31-Mar-13 20:48:58

Once a week littlemiss?

I. feel. sorry. for. your. children.

bedmonster Sun 31-Mar-13 20:48:59

Sparkling, I don't think anyone does it less than daily confused

trixymalixy Sun 31-Mar-13 20:49:07

Every day as a minimum. Anything else is just bleurgh.

foxache Sun 31-Mar-13 20:49:26

grin BuskersDog

Isn't pants common? wink I'm trying to think of a posh word for pants but failing.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 20:49:27

Not everyone is the same LeQ.

Oh no.

When I have a bath, I need to soak them off.

Iwantmybed Sun 31-Mar-13 20:49:36

Knickers every day, who doesn't? Trousers I'll wear a couple of days. I wear a bra for a couple of days though, nowhere near as grim as 2 day knickers.

Daily.

Sometimes though, I'll have a pajama day and wear them all day and then all night. Because I'm proper minging, me.

I throw mine away after one wear.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 20:50:25

Yes, we feel sorry for your children littlemiss

<discusting>

Every time I spill food down them.
Wait, what? grin

Finola1step Sun 31-Mar-13 20:50:35

Why are you asking OP?

WildThong Sun 31-Mar-13 20:50:39

Once a day unless I sneeze blush

littlemissbunny Sun 31-Mar-13 20:50:51

Yes catgirl you heard me!

Are you calling me a minger or something?

Seriously though do people really change them every day? Don't you care about the environment?

landofsoapandglory Sun 31-Mar-13 20:51:06

I change mine if I am going out, too.

DS1(18) puts a clean pair on in the morning, another pair on when he comes in from school, then changes into another clean pair before he goes out for a run! shock I thought teen boys were meant to be manky!

tethersend Sun 31-Mar-13 20:51:17

At least weekly. I'm not an animal.

Turning them inside out counts as changing, right?

HollyBerryBush Sun 31-Mar-13 20:51:27

g
g
g
Its dis*g*usting, not discusting

FFS

Littlemiss
Free yourself from the tyranny of pant hood.
Flash your flange with pride ( but don't get arrested)

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 20:51:32

Kecks maybe fox??

Hmm?

Fleecyslippers Sun 31-Mar-13 20:52:30

Commando grin

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 20:52:31

Calm down Holly.

You'll have an attack of the vapours.

EmpireBiscuit Sun 31-Mar-13 20:52:38

People wear pants to bed?! Under pyjamas? Are you meant to? I'm now worried I am making a bedroom faux pa every night by taking mine off prior to PJ'ing up.

catgirl1976 Sun 31-Mar-13 20:53:06

Of course you are minger littlemiss

I bet you stink and your house stinks of fetid pants. That's the environment you should be worrying about.

Appalling. I am going to report you to Kim and Aggie. They can come and scub your neglected gusset if you are too idle to do it yourself

LaQueen Sun 31-Mar-13 20:53:26

Yep, and then turning them back to front usual ...

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 20:53:45

I know it's disgusting.

FFS <said in a mimicy voice>

OzmaofOz Sun 31-Mar-13 20:53:49

I get 2 wears out of mine, on day 2 I turn them inside out. It's good for the environment innit.

foxache Sun 31-Mar-13 20:54:08

My mum knows someone who changes their bra every day shock

Pants and PJs (or not) is a whole separate thread Empire grin

Pants are a patriarchal construct perpetuated by the same misogynists that tell you that you need special perfume to make your fanjo smell acceptable. YA all VU for conforming to this myth by wearing them.

Also, they get in the way when it's time for the sootikin to make its appearance.

threesypeesy Sun 31-Mar-13 20:54:44

Every morning and every night here

Anyone that is genuinely less than every day is simply MANKY !!

usualsuspect Sun 31-Mar-13 20:54:49

Op is a pervert.

Do not discuss your knicker changing habits with OP.

LaQueen Sun 31-Mar-13 20:55:28

Sootikin ...you know, I'm not sure I even dare ask???

Stop bullying the OP cat girl. I'm a regular and often see you on here with your band of keyboard warrior, goady, sheep like followers.
It's not clever and it's not funny.

every day if talking underwear and if had extra shower then clean pair then and well after swimming well depends if can find them again or lost the buggers somewhere between locker and changing rooms

less if were talking pants as in trousers

AnyoneforTurps Sun 31-Mar-13 20:55:35

"Pants are a patriarchal construct"

Nonsense, pants are almost exclusively constructed by women wink

landofsoapandglory Sun 31-Mar-13 20:55:46

I change my bra every day foxache.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 20:56:01

shock

You, you...... flouncer

usualsuspect Sun 31-Mar-13 20:56:14

I see the gang are here with their BFFs.

OzmaofOz Sun 31-Mar-13 20:56:31

What's a sootikin ?

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 20:56:31

That was to usual by the way.

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 20:56:32

But changing your pad keeps em fresh no?

LaQueen: go on, Google it. You know you want to...

(that's me being goady)

gobbledegook1 Sun 31-Mar-13 20:56:40

I'm wondering the same as you ENormaSnob.

I always put a clean pair of knickers on everyday and will change them if I get changed to go out which usually superseeds a bath or shower. I will wear the same pair of trousers for several days if I'm not doing much or really going anywhere.

zoobaby Sun 31-Mar-13 20:56:50

If you don't wear pants under your pjs then you can only wear them once. Is that a whole other thread?

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 20:56:56

Plus I forgot a bit of talc acts a bit like dry shampoo too.

4 days:

Day 1 Put pants on
Day 2 Wear back to front
Day 3 Wear inside out
Day 4 Wear isdie out back to front

I find Febreze works v well on hot summer's days

grin
[bats flies away]

PenelopePisstop Sun 31-Mar-13 20:57:30

So people wear knickers in bed? Really? Why?

Hi usual grin

catgirl1976 Sun 31-Mar-13 20:57:31

I change mine 3 times a day.

Day Pants.
Sexy Time Pants.
Sleeping Pants.

Everyone does that surely? Anything less is vile

Plus I wear those perfumed liners and change them hourly. You can get different scents from the White Company. I am currently wearing 'Elephant's Sigh', which is fresh with a hint of the savannah.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 20:57:37

Pants are NOT trousers.

That for them there Americans. 'Kay?

Loislane78 Sun 31-Mar-13 20:58:24

NO NO NOOOOOO - someone mentioned sootikin. Only just forgotten about that from another thread sad

Discustin'

littlemissbunny Sun 31-Mar-13 20:58:25

I don't know if I dare ask what sootikin is?

I am not going to google bitter voice of experience

LaQueen Sun 31-Mar-13 20:58:33

Must. Not. Google...Must. Not. Google...

Nooooooo...help meeeeeeeeeee...

catgirl1976 Sun 31-Mar-13 20:58:59

I'm going to google

Nothing could be as bad as munting

BumpingFuglies Sun 31-Mar-13 20:58:59

Unless you are from Manchester. Then they're pants.

M'kay?

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 20:59:27

<draws breath in like tsunamis building> you have sexy time pants on every day? What for? Is t hat job related, must be <scratches head>

thornrose Sun 31-Mar-13 20:59:42

Oh I see this thread has been taken over by the freaks wink

BumpingFuglies Sun 31-Mar-13 20:59:52

It is DISCUSTING.

Fact.

LaQueen Sun 31-Mar-13 21:00:09

Shouldn't that be Sex-heh Time Pants Cat hmm

catgirl1976 Sun 31-Mar-13 21:00:29

Oh.

If you get a sootikin, it's time to change your pants

<rocks in corner, bleaches brain>

WildThong Sun 31-Mar-13 21:00:42

Joking aside, do not put talc anywhere near your fanboy, it's really bad for you!

littlemissbunny Sun 31-Mar-13 21:00:59

Catgirl I am very hairy so this acts as a barrier between my minge and pants anyway!

I'm hairy all over, even my hands!

Salmo

my closest friends are from USA so i do often call trousers pants so confuses hell out of me and them when people change words

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 21:01:37

What freaks?

I see no freaks.

<holds telescope to eye>

WildThong Sun 31-Mar-13 21:01:59

Not fanboy

fanjo blooming auto correct blush

Nevermind sodding sootikins <has not googles and never will>, what is the purpose of this scientific enquiry, Salmotrutta, eh??

<<suspicious>>

catgirl1976 Sun 31-Mar-13 21:02:33

Sexy time (or sex-heh time) is every evening between 7pm and 11pm, except Saturdays when it is extended to 12pm.

If you don't have a schedule, things can get very disorganised.

It's fine, you just let the sootikin plop down, step aside and walk away. Easy peasy.

If you wear crotchless knickers you never need to change them, the fabric has fantastic drying properties as well, quick rub with a towel they produce there own heat and are dry within minutes, you have to have a hair free crotch though, the sparks tend to cause light the hair if your not careful grin

countrykitten Sun 31-Mar-13 21:03:46

Every day at least once. I change my bra every day too - all underwear is worn once and washed.

Wearing pants under pyjamas is weird and wearing pants in bed is also weird. I sleep in nothing.

catgirl1976 Sun 31-Mar-13 21:03:47

littlemiss

That is worse

What if your greasy pubes poke through your trousers? What then hmm?

I was starting to worry about the fanboy, so glad that's been cleared up.

StuntGirl Sun 31-Mar-13 21:04:07

I googled confused shock

Daily.

I'm also wondering, how has this odd thread come about???

Lockedout434 Sun 31-Mar-13 21:04:23

If I throw them and they stick to the wall then and only then

BumpingFuglies Sun 31-Mar-13 21:04:28

I am particularly fond of fanboys
Although I'm trying to give them up Wild

And are you actually keeping a tally?

sjupes Sun 31-Mar-13 21:05:47

I change a lot blush

If i've slept naked i put a pair on then house clothes, after my shower i put clean ones on and day to day clothes, if i've been out through the day i come in and get clean pants and jammys on then if i decide to wear pants to bed then another pair.

So at least twice a day but usually more. Don't get me started on the pregnancy incontinence blush

foxache Sun 31-Mar-13 21:06:08

Yes I was wondering that too OP, what's the average?

PeneloPeePitstop Sun 31-Mar-13 21:06:12

Every three days. Then sell the dirties on ebay.

Not really. Daily, I'm not minging!

Iteotwawki Sun 31-Mar-13 21:06:14

Depends on which diet I'm on. But normally, when the elastic's got too tight and I have to order in a larger new pair.

usualsuspect Sun 31-Mar-13 21:06:28

Of course she is, she's a bit odd is Salmo.

ZebraOwl Sun 31-Mar-13 21:06:31

A Guider I know took her Brownies away for a week & reminded them each morning they were to put on a clean pair of knickers.

On the last day, when they were packing, one wee lass had no dirty undies to pack. Turned out that, as no one had said to take the dirty knickers off she'd just been layering up. It was back when Brownies wore dresses, but you'd still think someone might've noticed there was something awry...

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 21:07:18

Mwahahaha.

<licks pencil>

landofsoapandglory Sun 31-Mar-13 21:07:24

I googled too, Stuntgirl!shock

My, what a first world problem .....hmm

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 21:07:59

Talc goes on the garden not the house

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 21:08:10

And I'm not odd.

Just carrying out a public service and littlemissbunny made me

School bus joke: what's the difference between rude and crude?

Rude is when you throw your pants at the wall. Crude is when they stick.

whosiwhatsit Sun 31-Mar-13 21:08:51

We're supposed to change our pants?

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 21:09:17

<does complicated statistical analysis>

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 21:09:21

I think Salmo is a panty troll. shock Who would have thought it?

NumericalMum Sun 31-Mar-13 21:09:52

If you go commando at night do you change sheets every day, or is it just me that would have, ummm... discharge...?
Daily at least. Obviously. And would change bras daily too but I can't afford 7 nice ones at a time and i don't have time to do a bra wash frequently.

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 21:10:10

Are you going to do a bar chart or a pie chart Salmo?

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 21:10:27

It appears that if you don't change your pants thrice daily you are below average.

bedmonster Sun 31-Mar-13 21:10:29

Someone PLEASE tell me what sootikins are before I have to google and have nightmares?

And Empire I don't wear them to sleep in, I sleep totally al fresco, but I wear them if i've had a shower around 8ish for a few hours to loungs about in bed before they go in the wash. Wasteful when you think about it, but how much extra space in the wash does an extra pair of pants take? Mine are not very miniscule [grin[]

foxache Sun 31-Mar-13 21:10:56

Is it bad that I only own three bras and about five working pants?

On CSI last night, the man said 'there's nothing sadder than a woman with ragged panties' sad I blushed.

I change daily as is normal without a shower post exercise.

Post shower/excercise I put on fresh underwear.

Ds3 puts on fresh underwear everyday after school when he changes out of his uniform.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 21:11:11

It was a Venn Diagram aksherly.

I've been getting lots of PMs from posters who are not daily pant changing nazis like you lot, saying they feel bullied into remaining silent.
You lot ought to think about the effect your words can have on others.

And you, pervert, I will NOT be available for a photo shoot in Soho next Friday shock

Loislane78 Sun 31-Mar-13 21:12:04

No good comes of Googling strange words, unless you have one of those memory erasers like in Men in Black

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 21:12:16

shock

It'll be a crust chart grin

bedmonster Sun 31-Mar-13 21:12:51

Numerical I don't do my sheets every night no, my fanjo isn't in direct contact with the sheets. I do them once a week like lots of others, twice in the warmer weather. So just the once a week every week this year hmm

LaQueen Sun 31-Mar-13 21:12:59

What type of work do your pants do Fox <curious>

littlemissbunny Sun 31-Mar-13 21:13:05

I wear beige pants from asda, I'm scared they might go threadbare if I was them to much grin

usualsuspect Sun 31-Mar-13 21:13:11

MN at it's worst this thread.

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 21:13:30

How about a 'scatter diagram'?

foxache Sun 31-Mar-13 21:13:48

They work on keeping my bottom together LQ.

Every morning. Sleep in the pair from that morning.

I love big pants. And I only have a few bras too.

Hurrah for the school holidays and salmo's pants thread!

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 21:14:20

Yep. I take NO responsibility for the pant-changing -Nazis.

<waits for someone to say Godwins Law>

I always thought that boys underwear was called pants and girls was called knickers and if you lived in the States their trousers were called pants confused

I'm fascinated by this thread, I'm hoping people are joking here but knickers should be changed daily surely? Or yes twice if you're going out, swimming or similar.

I suppose I could buy a shed load of panty liners to save on washing but that's not good for the environment, unless san pro.

Yeah I'm not sure where I'm going with this really. Time to make a cuppa and keep watching this thread with interest.

catgirl1976 Sun 31-Mar-13 21:14:42

If you put pipecleaner whiskers in your sootikins they make a lovely and ethically sourced toy for the DCs

Much better than 'plastic tat'

I'm so not googling sootikins, just sounds wrong.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 21:16:21

Don't sweat it Mome.

Chillax.

Sootikins are natural. Get used to it dear ( head tilt )

landofsoapandglory Sun 31-Mar-13 21:16:48

OMG catgirl that is gross!

Oh. Just googled. Bleurghhhh.

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 21:17:40

Is Sootikins anything to do with fanny dandruff?

Nope, too many bleughs and eeughs to make me google it - have added it to the list of words never to cross my keyboard.

catgirl1976 Sun 31-Mar-13 21:18:25

Yes Sparkling. Mouse shaped lumps of the same apparantly

<boak>

EmpireBiscuit Sun 31-Mar-13 21:18:27

But, when do your bits get "aired" if you have them snuggled up in pants all day? I like the freedom offered from having jammy bottoms on without undies.

Yep sparkling but over rather a long period of time. Excuse the pun.

slatternlymother Sun 31-Mar-13 21:18:56

I refuse to believe people don't change their pants daily confused

That's just a wind up, like saying you don't change your socks daily or something. No one would wear their knickers longer than one day.

I only wear knickers to bed when I'm on my period, just in case. Otherwise, I think my lady area needs to breathe grin

NumericalMum I'm the same, I am ummm moist shall we say <ahem> that's why I have to frequently change underwear and wear some in bed and my pelvic floor is fine, it's not because of that <starts to feel awkward at over sharing>

If a woman really can wear the same pair for days and they're completely dry, nothing in them. I'm astonished but it's still a bit minging to me tbh

usualsuspect Sun 31-Mar-13 21:19:53

Jammy bottom? Empire, you filthy pervert.

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 21:20:07

Oh right. A girl where I used to work had fanny dandruff. She left it on the loo seat so we could all appreciate it. sad

slatternlymother Sun 31-Mar-13 21:20:19

what is fanny dandruff?!

And what's wrong with smelling of fish?
It's better than summer meadow or whatever carcinogenic substance embedded in always ultra.

Yeah chillax Salmotrutta, I'm chillaxing in my clean knickers wink

nenevomito Sun 31-Mar-13 21:21:09

Daily with a liner as well since my children ruined my nether regions. Anything less would be bleurgh.

usualsuspect Sun 31-Mar-13 21:21:11

she should have used vag and shoulders.

WildThong Sun 31-Mar-13 21:21:31

You change your socks daily ?? shock !

EmpireBiscuit Sun 31-Mar-13 21:22:18

Yup - if my jammy ass got all over the sheets I'd need to wash them more than twice a year....

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 21:22:36

Too right usual. I have mentioned it on Mn before and got a little bit told off in case she has a skin condition. But I know she was just a minger. wink

2kidsintow Sun 31-Mar-13 21:22:47

Each morning. Up and a shower. New pants.
Then they are worn to bed that night too.
Unless I'm going out, or have been swimming or have had another shower/bath that day. Then I'll put on another pair.

littlemissbunny Sun 31-Mar-13 21:22:49

Hear hear Katie who wants a fanjo that is summer meadow fresh! It's wrong!

Bearcrumble Sun 31-Mar-13 21:23:08

Interestingly it seems that the nursery rhyme "pussycat pussycat" was about Queen Anne's sootikin which fell out in St Paul's Cathedral during the Thanksgiving Service for the end of the War of the Spanish Succession.

EmpireBiscuit Sun 31-Mar-13 21:23:19

Now the word moist has been used I shall be hiding this thread.

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 21:23:24

Oh no. I change my socks daily too. I that wrong ? sad

OMG my ribs hurt from laughing after googling sootikins and reading about dandruff. MN is so funny. But that is gross.

Next time a woman complains about her partner not going down on her, perhaps we need to ask how fresh her underwear is or if she has dandruff...

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 21:23:46

*Is

Sorry empire grin

And so what if DH has to wear a snorkel when we get intimate?

slatternlymother Sun 31-Mar-13 21:24:45

No sparkling, who wouldn't? confused

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 21:25:05

As long as he doesn't need a hairdryer to blast the fanny dandruff off....

littlemissbunny Sun 31-Mar-13 21:25:31

I don't have fanjdruff thank you very much

wonders if there is a gap in the market for a special shampoo

<<still not googled sootikin>>

shock @ origin of 'pussycat, pussycat'

grin

slatternlymother Sun 31-Mar-13 21:25:53

I don't understand, how would you get fanny dandruff? I didn't even know that could happen?

WildThong Sun 31-Mar-13 21:27:36

I googled! Why oh why did I have to do it.
Only affect poor women apparently, hmm
Queen Anne had no excuse then!

Maybe fandruff sufferes need to go 'no poo'?

<<innocent>>

sufferers

Bearcrumble Sun 31-Mar-13 21:28:17

I suppose if you were sitting eating very dry crackers in the nude...

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 21:28:50

If you don't wash, the old skin flakes don't get washed off? I didn't dare ask her slatternly.

slatternlymother Sun 31-Mar-13 21:29:55

Oh. Oh God, that's horrible sparkling! <vomits quietly so as not to disturb the conversation>

Anyway it's dangerous to put soap down there.
Don't come crying to me when your labia explode hmm

WildThong Sun 31-Mar-13 21:30:42

Maybe a regional thing, but pussycat pussycat getting a piece and jam (Glasgow ver), how is that about sootikins?

slatternlymother Sun 31-Mar-13 21:31:22

Is it, katie?

littlemissbunny Sun 31-Mar-13 21:31:29

How dare you all suggest I am poor and dirty, IT'S A SKIN CONDITION I CAN'T HELP IT.

Stop bullying me!

It's your fault for starting this thread salmotrutta
I did not encourage you in the slightest

It's cos I is ginger isn't it? You all hate me!

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 21:31:42

She could at least have wiped it off the loo seat.

slatternlymother Sun 31-Mar-13 21:33:01

sparkling, without being too strange, how did you know it was her? Did you ask?

<imagines conversation>

Yes slatternly mother.
You have been warned hmm

foxache Sun 31-Mar-13 21:33:51

How much dandruff would you need to produce to leave a trail on the loo seat??

BruthasTortoise Sun 31-Mar-13 21:33:56

Please don't use the word "pants". We are a civilised people, undergarments is the only correct term and only to be whispered surreptitiously if absolutely necessary.

Bearcrumble Sun 31-Mar-13 21:34:24

"Pussycat pussycat, where have you been?"
"I've been up to London to visit the Queen."
"Pussycat pussycat, what did you there?"
"I frightened a little mouse under her chair"

I know nothing about piece (piece of what?) and jam.

slatternlymother Sun 31-Mar-13 21:34:27

How so? Dangerous?

<worries excessively for critical lady parts>

Yak. Why can't you wash your noon?????

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 21:36:07

shock

I start an innocent thread about pants, turn my back for 5 minutes, and it descends into discustingness.

I am discusted. And, frankly, disappointed in you all.

Vipers.

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 21:36:16

No. We worked in a team of 12. A couple of others followed Miss FD into the loo at different times and it became apparent who she was. She came in early so that helped to narrow it down. sad

You can wash your foof, but not inside your foof.

HTH.

flamingtoaster Sun 31-Mar-13 21:37:35

Surely the most important question has been left out of the survey. Regardless of how often they are changed is everyone wearing Mumsnet approved pants? We can't let standards (or indeed pants) slip.

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 21:38:03

There was discussion about the fanny dandruff maybe being 50/50 with talc? But this was never proved, Miss FD was told her services weren't required for work related reasons eventually.

It has been clinically suggested that soap products in the area in question alter the PH balance of your flower, causing an acid build-up that can be lethal when exposed to a naked flame
I went out for a fag once and it was like a flame thrower. Thank god I don't wear pants or I would have set myself on fire. As it was, I only singed a few coke cans and other litter. But be warned, it could happen to YOU!

nenevomito Sun 31-Mar-13 21:39:45

flamingtoaster - indeed, you have the full brief at one end of the pant spectrum and the gstring at the other. Its important to know which.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 21:39:53

Mumsnet have approved pants?

Are they sensible?

Can one trampoline in them?

littlemissbunny Sun 31-Mar-13 21:40:11

Wow Katie is there a special fire extinguisher for that? The minge extinge?

Oh I see, that's not so bad then pacific

Not sure about the smell thing though, I think I would rather be fragrant.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 21:41:06

I'm still appalled at what this publicly-minded survey has descended into mind.

angry

foxache Sun 31-Mar-13 21:41:15

Flaming, are MN pants ones that are large enough to hoick up to chin height?
Not thongs, I know that.

WildThong Sun 31-Mar-13 21:41:15

Pussy cat pussy cat where have you been?
I've been to London to visit the Queen
What did she give you?
A piece and jam (jam sandwich btw)
What did you say?
I said thank you ma'am

abbyfromoz Sun 31-Mar-13 21:42:08

Well since i shower in the morning and the evening i wear a fresh pair of knickers each time.

The MN approved pants are sloggis I believe.
Not that I own any, of course.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 21:42:52

That's more like it abby

Bearcrumble Sun 31-Mar-13 21:43:16

I feel sorry for scroffyclunge lady.

In my mind she was a fairy and it was fairydust.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 21:43:22

I have sloggis.

They are tres comfortable.

JeanBodel Sun 31-Mar-13 21:43:29

I change my knicks daily. Socks, on the other hand...

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 21:43:54

I used to have some Sloggis. A pair flew off the washing line in strong wind into the neighbour's garden once. <irrelevant>

nenevomito Sun 31-Mar-13 21:44:20

sloggis? What about M&S? Surely there's room for M&S knickers.

That's it, I'm off.
You have made me feel like shit because I don't wear pants.
( flounces )

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 21:44:59

She was no fairy Bear. It was ladydust alright.

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 21:45:21

My pants are from Debenhams.

littlemissbunny Sun 31-Mar-13 21:46:13

My pants are M&S because they were in the sale and I get staff discount

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 21:46:53

Indeed baby.

Back when M&S were struggling there was much debate about where we would buy future pants amongst me and my colleagues if M&S closed down! shock

WorraLiberty Sun 31-Mar-13 21:47:37

I just scrape the gusset and chip bits off

No need for all this changing business

Next you'll all be telling me you change your bras too

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 21:47:50

Don't go Katie.

Don't give in to Pant Nazis!

<hicks banner>

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 21:48:04

Or hoicks.

foxache Sun 31-Mar-13 21:48:39

Worra shock are you every thread!

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 21:48:57

Ewww.

Too busy MNing to do a washing Worra?

WorraLiberty Sun 31-Mar-13 21:49:43

Well yes

Priorities...priorities!

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 21:50:04

Think of the children...

I like big, shiny, black pants with a bit of lace on.
Up to the belly button.

NeverKnowinglyUnderstood Sun 31-Mar-13 21:52:05

I change mine once a day, if I sm going out I change them, bur if I have a bath half way through the day I don't always put on a clean pair..

Which column am I in on the spreadsheet???

WorraLiberty Sun 31-Mar-13 21:52:15

Ahh good point

They can wash my skiddies while I MNet

Genius

flamingtoaster Sun 31-Mar-13 21:53:36

In the current economic situation I think M&S pants from the sale should be considered just as acceptable as Sloggis. What I've never managed to work out, however, is there a preferred colour for the Mumsnet pants.

My view is that pristine white is the most acceptable - proves they are absolutely clean.

grin

grin

NippyDrips Sun 31-Mar-13 21:55:52

I wear day pants in the morning and put on my great big Apple catchers for bed.
if I think I am getting lucky with dp I will put on some sexitime pants too so 2 or 3 times a day.

I can't sleep naked down there incase a spider crawls up my flue.

High fives mermaid

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 21:57:04

Many years ago, my DH bought me a thong when he was on a trip abroad.

I was appalled.

<shudder>

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 21:58:15

ROFL at NippyDrips grin

foxache Sun 31-Mar-13 21:58:55

I'm just glad the whole visible thong thing is over now.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 21:59:32

Thong thing.

Thing thong.

gordyslovesheep Sun 31-Mar-13 21:59:58

once or twice a day

Thongs = same itchy bum feeling as worms.

NotMostPeople Sun 31-Mar-13 22:00:37

My Mother was very excited a few years ago when they launched black panty liners as this meant she could just change the liner every day and keep the same knickers. Boak. No idea why black made any difference.

She also keeps the same make up on for three days. Double boak

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:01:16

I've never had worms...

Have spent too long in the infants I think salmo

Charlie!!!!!! shockshockshockshockshock

garlicbrunch Sun 31-Mar-13 22:05:33

I need a Mumsnet historian. How long does it take a sootikin to build up? I only ask because, what with losing 18 children, Queen Anne's clunge must have been quite a busy thoroughfare. And she can't have had many periods.

I didn't shower today. I'm scared I'll have a sootikin tomorrow shock

Ediblemushrooms Sun 31-Mar-13 22:05:41

Daily or twice daily if exercising a lot or just feel the need.
Could even be 3 x in summer if really hot and going out in the evening.

Never wear them in bed excpet at that time of month and can't quite see why other people would.

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 22:06:22

There will be a bit of FD possibly garlic. shock

littlemissbunny Sun 31-Mar-13 22:06:31

My OH wears asda pants should I LTB?

And do you wear different pants when you're on your period? My sister has older pants that she uses for this purpose, am I just a slattern?

thegreylady Sun 31-Mar-13 22:06:33

Every morning clean ones ,none in bed,if I have a midday shower I have an extra pair of clean ones.

grin ha my first shock face on MN!

garlicbrunch Sun 31-Mar-13 22:07:32

Fanny dandruff? Eeek, Sparkling! shock

<rushes off to shower>

EnchantedBunny Sun 31-Mar-13 22:07:52

I change my pants daily, although sometimes I am a scuzzer and do not shower daily. Also at certain times of the month I find the use of knicker stickers to absorb excess foof juice negates the need to change pants more than twice a day. I am class, me.
grin

thegreylady Sun 31-Mar-13 22:08:26

Mine are all either M&S or Sloggis.

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 22:08:59

Just throw some talc on garlic. wink

harverina Sun 31-Mar-13 22:09:16

I know someone who doesn't change their pants everyday. They took 1 spare pair of pants on a 5 day holiday but took clean socks for every day. Logic?

But Bunny, don't you find it a bit painful when the foof jus attaches your pubes to the gusset and you unknowingly take them off?

BarredfromhavingStella Sun 31-Mar-13 22:09:41

Never.

garlicbrunch Sun 31-Mar-13 22:10:43

knicker stickers to absorb excess foof juice

Now THAT's a brilliant campaign in the making!

"Foof juice? Knicker stickers! Job's a good'un!" grin

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 22:11:21

Pubes Katie? I thought all MNetters were Kojak stylee in the foof regions.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:11:35

Who is this person haverina?

Is it an MNer?

<faints>

They are after a foof jus wax...

garlicbrunch Sun 31-Mar-13 22:12:49

Harverina, they use socks as knicker stickers?

Not sure Talc would agree to being thrown on my fanjo, Sparkling.

nenevomito Sun 31-Mar-13 22:12:57

'sexitime' pants. shock

What kind of monstrosities are those???

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:13:10

Wot, actual Never Barred?

Or some sort of metaphorical Never.

I'm trying to raise the tone here...

<glares>

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 22:13:18

grin Katie. Or sticking the knicker sticker the wrong way up.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:14:05

I'm too old to have "sexi-time" pants. sad

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:14:45

Or maybe that should be agrin

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:15:58

Or a angry?

CotherMuckingFunt Sun 31-Mar-13 22:16:04

Fuck me backwards with a red slipper. I have something MN approved shock

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:16:18

Or maybe a envy

Sexitime pants can be found in Primark, in the thrush section.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:16:39

Wot?

Sloggis?

EnchantedBunny Sun 31-Mar-13 22:16:49

Ooh Katie yes, there is always that risk...blush

I am quite impressed that my classy 'foof juice' has been poshified to a rather sophisticated 'foof jus'! smile

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:17:12

To Cother by the way.

It is MN, we have standards y'know grin

CotherMuckingFunt Sun 31-Mar-13 22:18:12

Sloggis indeed. An I change them occasionally. Next I'll be coordinating my scarf with my nail varnish and cleaning my loo with bracken.

MousyMouse Sun 31-Mar-13 22:18:38

chistmas and easter
if I need it or not.

MousyMouse Sun 31-Mar-13 22:18:55

alternate years that is

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:19:21

Standards?

Standards??

My classy thread has been hi-jacked by Pant Nazis and discustingness.

<sulks>

BarredfromhavingStella Sun 31-Mar-13 22:19:42

Yep, never as in never cos I don't wear any grin lowering the tone nicely I think?

DD has the foof jus that bleaches her sexi time pants.
We call her Harpic

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:20:41

shock

Ha ha!! This thread is making me grin

harverina Sun 31-Mar-13 22:21:18

No a family member of mine!

And socks are just socks. Unless he is using these in place of pants?

NippyDrips Sun 31-Mar-13 22:21:27

Sexitime pants are anything scant made from lace or bits of ribbon. Only to be worn for short periods of time due to their discomfort and indeed thrush inducing capabilities.

CotherMuckingFunt Sun 31-Mar-13 22:22:16

<sprinkles fairy dust over salmo's thread>

<doesn't share where fairy dust was collected from>

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:22:41

Well, I'm glad you're grin Charlie.

I'm not.

angry of Mayfair.

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:22:47

Do you iron you knickers?

harverina Sun 31-Mar-13 22:23:23

And the people that ate changing their pants 3 times per day? How many pairs of pants do you own???

I change daily, more if going out and don't wear underwear to bed just jammies. 3 pairs are excessive.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:23:48

Of course.

Doesn't everybody like my mum.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:24:35

I own eleventy million pairs of pants.

Iron?
How big exactly do you think my arse is?

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:24:56

Salmo bet you have iron knickers

harverina Sun 31-Mar-13 22:25:33

You'd need to if you were changing that often!

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:25:50

Katie can you make one of those balls from bound round elastic bands out if your knickers - you get boiled on your bum from such stringy types yer know.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:25:53

Wha'?

sjupes Sun 31-Mar-13 22:26:28

I have around 15/20 pairs of black primark granny pants, 5 pairs of coloured shorts, 10 ish pairs of 'pretty' pants and shorts and 15 ish thongs.

I live in the granny pants and shorts. Dp think i expect action if i wear a thong .. no chance!

MousyMouse Sun 31-Mar-13 22:26:35

no I only iron my knicker stickers <love love love that term>

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:26:47

boils

Tis a common problem related to skimpy underwear actuaaaaarrrrllllleeeeeeee.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:27:14

Err, are you a bit squiffy Feeling?

harverina Sun 31-Mar-13 22:27:24

If your ironing your pants you'd go to the effort of changing your pants daily. If your minging you ain't gonna be ironing your pants - oh unless they iron their dirty pants to make them look fresh <boak>

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:28:00

Salmo you living your life through your virtual kicker pie chart

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:28:06

confused

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:29:14

harve bit of febreeze...you'd be right to go

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:29:36

No.

I'm on hollibobs.

And can do wot I likes.

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:30:10

grin <stifles rum n coke breath from shrouding Fred>

harverina Sun 31-Mar-13 22:30:20

Surely fabreeze is not flower friendly?!

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:31:00

Ha aha ha ha s I frot that read you were 'on' hollyboobs.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:31:20

Febreeze is evilness.

It honks.

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:31:47

Tis alright ok if you have wire wool to protect.

harverina Sun 31-Mar-13 22:31:54

Shake n vac maybe? It's like fabreeze and talc combined grin

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:31:57

Ahem.

harverina Sun 31-Mar-13 22:32:36

Shake n vac maybe? It's like fabreeze and talc combined grin

harverina Sun 31-Mar-13 22:33:07

Feeling ur killing me blush

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:33:18

It's not good though is it when your flower is in the autumn of its years and the wool is wire.

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 22:34:57

Shake and Vac your foof? shock

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:35:02

It's well known harv that shake n vac clogs hoovers and is NOT recommended, modern equipment of dust in a sootikins

Has anyone mentioned gusset-bleaching yet?

<<runs off again to top up MiL's glass of wine and to make polite conversation NOT about undergarments>>

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:35:17

equivalent

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:36:27

I know nothing of gusset-bleaching.

But we must act fast before Feeling gets ideas.

harverina Sun 31-Mar-13 22:36:32

Foof?

foxache Sun 31-Mar-13 22:37:00

I meant to say earlier, Crust Chart is genius.

Yes Pacific, Have Harpic secreting DD smile

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:37:11

I think Feeling needs coffee.

Fast.

littlemissbunny Sun 31-Mar-13 22:37:14

I wash my judgey pants daily, and hoik them up above my waist!

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:38:07

You do Katie?

Must be a pH thing?

pigletmania Sun 31-Mar-13 22:38:18

Every few days when a crusty layer starts to form

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:38:24

Well pacofic you could get that done with the bum hole bleaching save on time, one stop shop - goodness gracious the personal grooming goes on and on.

I've just about got to grip with root touch ups.

Now....Stained knickers get chucked in the bin, but someone said on tv you shouldn't cos folk need em abroad who havnt got an m n s

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 22:38:34

Right I have the Shake and Vac and the Vax. I am guessing I need the 'crevice tool' attachment?

pacific I double dare you to mention sootikins in conversation.
<immature>

<<preens as Inventor or Crust Chart>>

Having recently seen DMiL's undergarments (I shall henceforth not use any other term), I can see the glamourpussness of Sloggis, I tellya shock!

Yes, she was very relieved when MN explained she didn't have the galloping foof rot grin

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:40:04

I'm NOT sending my stained pants abroad to some unsuspecting innocent person.

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:40:25

Bet you have a nasal trimmer as well that you strap on to crevice tool

Harpic is like 2 in 1 shampoo then, yes??
Gusset and bum bleaching in one easy step.

Genius!!

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:40:58

I have never seen a galloping food, maybe a gaping one.

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:41:09

foof

I could send my sexi time pants. It would be nice for them to get an outing grin

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:42:03

Please keep the Harpic away from delicate areas.

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:42:12

Desscaler versio too, use hair rinser attachment for an enenema

<<trials options>>

"Oh, I have terrible trouble with our fireplace, the sootinkins is just getting too much, must get it swept"

"We have a new bunny rabbit. His name is Sootikins" <cute, non?>

"Oh, her. She's a right sootikins caaaaaw." <hand flick>

<<accepts dare>>

grin

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 22:43:20

Maybe get some Cillit Bang? BANG and the fanny dandruff is gone!

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:43:26

Well Katie's according to your earlier post you gets the, out every night between 7 and 11. Not that I was jealousy no not me. Or was you lying .

Back off Amy lurking grammar police .

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:44:07

Lol sparks

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:44:51

You know you can get excema down there

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 22:44:56

Limescale free foof Feeling. grin

That wasn't me feeling grin
The only thing I get out between 7 and 11 are posts on here.

Cilit BANG!! grin

<<wheezes>>

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:46:46

Hmm, wouldn't recommend in soft water areas though, could dry and shrivel up completely! Then where would the knickers be.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:46:58

"I'm Barry Scott"

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:47:36

Oh Katie's is a nun then, we someone else said this earlier bare faced cheek!

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:48:10

Band and the dirt is gone ~ not from your knickers love

littlemissbunny Sun 31-Mar-13 22:48:31

Clit bang, bang and the druff is gone grin

I am Sister Katie Immaculata smile

Am laughing a big LOT!!!!!!! grin

How do I explain this one to DH who is wondering why I just snotted my wine all over my spanky red sofa!?!?

Am having images of sootikins raining down the chimney and a rabbit prancing amongst the debris.

This undergarment will keep the sootikins away and will ensure that your foof is maintance free grin

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 22:50:43

How about Viakal? It's the Viakal fizz that does the bizz. wink

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:51:16

Why do t I have a spanky sofa? Same reason I don't put sexy time knickers on everyday between 7 and 11 pm

foxache Sun 31-Mar-13 22:51:40

Oh FGS, I'm trying to wedge beef curtains in here somehow, can't find a way sad

'Various colours' too, so you could have days-of-the-week ones

<<flexes credit card>>

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:52:05

You better say ten hail Mary's then Katie for even reading this thread

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:53:24

Well that's what happens when you try to wear things in your twenties and the gusset cuts into them giving you some sort of wedged beef curtains, and swag n tails.

Camel toe is a thing isn't it

What the fuck are the beads for? Do I want to know???

littlemissbunny Sun 31-Mar-13 22:54:31

Yes Katie run away before we corrupt your innocent mind even more

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:55:05

FYI pacif I have just started to build my knicker drawer back up after maternity buckets as they ve long outstayed their welcome. M n s have three for £10 I'm buying three pairs per month .

Trying to get bra fitting in to.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:55:23

A spanky sofa???

What the actual hell??

<faints>

I'm praying for you smile

Hourly.

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:56:28

Well they not fanny beads checkpoint, that Luke be love eggs.

Ahem, actually you use the beads to count out your hail Mary's mas you say them. Me thinks, but nothing to do with down there's.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:56:30

Good on you Feeling.

grin

It autocorrected to spunky sofa salmo that would have been so much worse.
<it IS NOT spunky*

What I would like to know, why oh why do I post on threads like this??

I am a middle-aged woman, mother of 4, professional job. I play the piano FFS!

Why do feel the need to post even an ironic post on a thread like this?
Needy, moi? grin

Thanks for the laughs, ladees, I am of to change in to my PJ pants (no sexitime tonight, MiL in da house)

foxache Sun 31-Mar-13 22:57:41

Feeling, Debenhams are better for bra fitting, I went from waist-boobs to chest ones.

FairPhyllis Sun 31-Mar-13 22:57:43

Generally only on February 29th.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:57:51

Err, that was to the buying of M&S pants.

Not the next bit about beads.

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:58:15

Viacal btw would burn, burn you a new arshole actually spark, so no. It's too alkaline. Right, wonders if sparks can be trusted in a cleaning aisle again.

littlemissbunny Sun 31-Mar-13 22:59:08

I need more than a prayer Katie
I need divine intervention!

Mumsnet has well and truly corrupted me, I used to be so innocent and shy!

I am a pillar of the community Pacific.
I love these threads. grin

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 22:59:43

Pacific - I am beyond middle age.

I admit to hollibobs madness.

Oh yeah.

grin pacific nighty night!

Love eggs are shit.

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 23:00:18

I love trying new cleaning products Feeling. But on hard surfaces generally. grin

The last time I went for a bra fitting the lady asked if I wanted 'support' or 'cleavage'. sad

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 23:00:35

You started old salmon knickers! But thanks I'll give debs a try. I have upper love handle boobs, I have to shift them separately when I turn over in bed.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 23:00:51

Oh, and I'm all professional-like and whatnot in RL too.

Shit, must go to bed. Am over sharing massively. grin

foxache Sun 31-Mar-13 23:01:26

This has been liberating, I have learned a lot, not all of it I wanted to know. Pacific, thank you for the crust grin

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 23:01:54

Get this everyone, sparks has a hard foof!

Jeez do t mess with sparks.

You would need GPS and a microscope to locate my baps.
God did not answer that particular prayer hmm

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 23:02:30

Salmon?

Salmon??

I think you'll find it's Salmo as in Trout.

Brown trout.

You caaaaah.

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 23:03:34

What a reputation to have Feeling. 'She of the hard foof'. grin

littlemissbunny Sun 31-Mar-13 23:03:59

Salmo don't you mean

did you mean to be so rude

Is the fishy nickname a HINT as to your under cracker hygiene salmo?

Mmmmmmm, trouuuuuuuuty smile

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 23:04:52

No you just missing the m love

foxache Sun 31-Mar-13 23:04:56

Admittedly I typed salmon earlier, but then erased the whole thing.

Gives a whole new meaning to the phrase " Trout Pout"

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 23:07:01

<disclaimer> I dot rad the punch olive magazine so I don't know that trout can be spelt salmo.

DevonCiderPunk Sun 31-Mar-13 23:07:03

This has made me laugh a lot. Thank you folks.

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 23:07:55

LOL katie, you would have to be a red snapper fish the. Katiescarlet !

Tee hee.

DevonCiderPunk Sun 31-Mar-13 23:08:13

Feelinggood please have a pint of water before bed...

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 23:09:10

Well c on with a nickname like foxache I'm not surprised......your thread name has to be fooache

Coffeenowplease Sun 31-Mar-13 23:09:35

I once went on a 2 week holiday with a guy that brought with him...4 pairs of pants. 4. For 2 weeks.

Vom.

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 23:09:48

Please don't put an s in your name devon

DevonCiderPunk Sun 31-Mar-13 23:12:34

Hee hee! You have passed the sight test. Make it half a pint of water grin

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 23:13:22

<sigh>

Latin nomenclature: A Short Lesson

Genus then Species.

So:

Salmo trutta = brown trout

Salmo salar = salmon

And it has to be in italics if its Latin nomenclature.

OK?

You viperish caaaaaahs.

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 23:16:15

Awwwwww that be that there taxonomical classification shite the awww right.

But it thought trout was pink

foxache Sun 31-Mar-13 23:16:24

Ok grin all I want to know now is how to abbreviate you.

littlemissbunny Sun 31-Mar-13 23:17:01

fox just call her pants grin

DevonCiderPunk Sun 31-Mar-13 23:17:29

vacca vipera

any good?

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 23:18:33

I answer to anything except "Bastard".

So Sal, Salmo or whatevs. Dude.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 23:18:44

grin

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 23:19:15

You still a fish interested in knickers, oh the irony.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 23:19:57

Oh, I forgots to say that the Genus has a capital but the species doesn't.

HTH.

DevonCiderPunk Sun 31-Mar-13 23:21:19

Hmm. Is "genus" a proper noun, though?

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 23:22:10

Is that a member of the viperidae Devon?

So a snakey thang.

Not my spesh.

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 23:22:19

<Sharp intake of breath>

I'm not no knicker snake, you kinky twisted folk. Dear me. i like making cakes and cleaning windows etc.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 23:22:47

I don't know.

I'm not an English grad.

littlemissbunny Sun 31-Mar-13 23:22:57

Ooh this is all getting a bit scientific and technical now!

Good night, and thanks Salmo for accepting the dare and an entertaining evening grin

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 23:23:46

And I meant that in the Latin nomenclature you write the Genus name with a capital.

foxache Sun 31-Mar-13 23:24:21

Thanks, and grin missbunny.

This pants thread has got very intellectual, am I the only half drunk one?

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 23:24:40

I'm stopping the sciences thang.

It puts folks off.

Nighty night littlemiss

wink

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 23:25:17

No more Intelekshul.

Oh no.

littlemissbunny Sun 31-Mar-13 23:25:43

I can't quite believe I'm sober and I've spent the evening talking about pants grin

foxache Sun 31-Mar-13 23:25:57

My mum is turning up at 9 tomorrow morning, i have been living like old man Steptoe for a week <sob>

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 23:26:35

<looks about>

Night

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 23:26:51

I will go to bed at midnight.

Because I can, and my DC are All Grown Up and Don't Live Here.

Ha!

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 23:27:34

Sofox you really havnt changed your pants then <hilarious>

TooExtraImmatureCheddar Sun 31-Mar-13 23:28:09

You bastarding vipers, you made me google sootikins! <shudders>

I am in bed grin
Pants and vest primly on.

foxache Sun 31-Mar-13 23:29:23

Night Feeling and night miss bunny, I can't believe you did all this sober smile

I've just opened another can because that's how classy I am.

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 23:29:56

Don't it shudder too much it might fall out, we don't want that round here, tis cean in here z <sly smiles>

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 23:30:41

No I have a rium n come, craving crisps.

littlemissbunny Sun 31-Mar-13 23:31:53

Right I really am going now!

Probably not totally sober, there is probably still some of last nights cocktails in my bloodstream grin

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 23:31:54

<snigger at "rium n come">

Beaverfeaver Sun 31-Mar-13 23:32:15

I never wear them but change my sofa weekly

LahleeMooloo Sun 31-Mar-13 23:32:25

To me, pants are long legged outerwear items (another word for trousers), so I can get a couple of days' wear out of them if they're not dirty.

However, if you are referring to knickers, at least once a day, or twice if I'm going out in the evening.

foxache Sun 31-Mar-13 23:32:32

I have Feeling! Not that anyone would know.

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 23:32:42

Katie took you a long time to say those hail Mary's .

Now there is a thread, do you own a vest and under what circumstances do you wear one.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 23:32:57

I'm very relived Beaver.

Quite right.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 23:33:10

relieved

I own many vests which I wear due to lack of norkage. grin

foxache Sun 31-Mar-13 23:33:59

I am jealous of the rium and come, it's my favourite. Going to splash out tomorrow.

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 23:34:23

beaverfever I out it to you your knickers are too thick and no amount of calpol will bring you beaverfever down. God forbid you should own a leather sofa.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 23:34:35

Trousers are NOT PANTS!

Unless you live in the USA or Birmingham!

Alright?

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 23:34:58

Me n DH went halvers our good old tesco express.

Beaverfever!!!
(dies)
gringringrin

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 23:35:50

I'm quite proud of this thread.

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 23:36:08

Have I missed a salient point about birmingham, I am there north of it now just what are you saying?

foxache Sun 31-Mar-13 23:37:09

You should be Salmo, it's made my eve, was just heaving my knitting into the other room with a heavy sigh until I spotted it.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 23:38:28

Apparently they say "pants" in Birmingham when they mean trousers!!

Inconceivable.

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 23:39:05

Oh shit beaver you need to apply an ice pack I'm editable, sorry just realised I misread your post adm you do t wear any.

<chucks sofa throws>

foxache Sun 31-Mar-13 23:39:10

I do love Brummies mind, the best accent.

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 23:39:32

I am an hour south of Birmingham and pants are knickers.

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 23:39:41

<chucks ten a bed pads>

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 23:39:44

Aww.

Thank you foxy.

I added a "y".

It suits you.

foxache Sun 31-Mar-13 23:40:54

Woo! <twirls> I like it.

Salmotrutta Sun 31-Mar-13 23:42:22

Good.

It's all good.

I am pleased with this nights work.

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 23:42:27

Well I'm not a brummie, been here five years am from up north me. I watch
Phoenix nights as comfort viewing.

Well sparks I bare that in mind next it e I'm in harbirn for OU. I will stay clear if the waitrose clea ing product aisles

Feelingood Sun 31-Mar-13 23:43:54

Salmo you should add an salmostrutta

foxache Sun 31-Mar-13 23:50:31

Thank you Salmo, been the best company all week.

Am conking. Night lovelies bear

LahleeMooloo Mon 01-Apr-13 00:04:24

I live in Lancashire, and lots of commoners like me call trousers "pants". I only use "trousers" when I'm being posh/formal!

You are all mentallers and I have had an awesome eve.
Night night gringrin

Salmotrutta Mon 01-Apr-13 00:05:08

Well, that was nice.

One of the cats was accidentally shut in the office.

And crapped.

So I had that to clean up.

Nice. DH was conked out in front of the TV. angry

Although to be fair he had to work today for 9 hours.

Sparklingbrook Mon 01-Apr-13 00:05:44

It's 1st April Yay!

Salmotrutta Mon 01-Apr-13 00:06:26

Yay indeed.

<grumpy after cat-crapping incident>

Sparklingbrook Mon 01-Apr-13 00:07:49

Time to play jolly japes on the family. Your cat has got into the spirit already Salmo. grin

Salmotrutta Mon 01-Apr-13 00:11:42

He's a little bastard.

But I luffs him.

Feelingood Mon 01-Apr-13 00:14:54

Sorry bout your cat crap, there is a pa t pun in there somewhere sorry!

My DH is conked on sofa, I have come to bed now, skin care completed, teeth and clean panties already in place, I can sleep T ease.

There are some pants movies on though.

Salmotrutta Mon 01-Apr-13 00:17:10

I must go to bed too.

Ill be doing a pants check in the morning.

You've all been warned.

Night all. X

Feelingood Mon 01-Apr-13 00:18:50

Night and thank you x may the pants be with you.

A pant check<scratches head)

Salmotrutta Mon 01-Apr-13 08:41:33

Is everybody wearing clean pants then?

Good.

Off out now so behave yourselves.

See, if you made your cat wear pants, the cat crapping incident would have been easier to clean up <<nods sagely>>

I have clean pants AND clean socks (with chicks on grin!) on - put that on your spreadsheet.

<whispers> my DD and I are sitting in bed together eating toast. No clean knickers here yet...

littlemissbunny Mon 01-Apr-13 10:09:41

Morning everyone,

I'm still wearing yesterday's pants cos I'm lazy and haven't got dressed yet I hope you have a suitable column on your spreadsheet!

grin

Um, I'm still wearing yesterday's too but will head up for shower in a bit, maybe after one more cup of tea.

Feelingood Mon 01-Apr-13 10:12:17

Not up long still have same pants on.

With the way my DD is waving her plate around it won't be sootikins in the fanjo but crumbs. That's why you should wear knickers in bed wink

<considers hoovering bed>

Feelingood Mon 01-Apr-13 10:30:38

Clean pants!

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