to think AIBU should be split into serious AIBU and not so serious, I've got more important things to worry about AIBU

(51 Posts)
kim147 Sun 31-Mar-13 11:51:55

Because that will then stop people pouncing on you.

complexnumber Sun 31-Mar-13 12:03:02

So which category would you put this thread in?

kim147 Sun 31-Mar-13 12:05:41

This is so not serious.

Trills Sun 31-Mar-13 13:30:47

I'd rather it was split into "I am not BU grr I am ranting" and "I actually may consider the possibility that IABU"

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 13:39:24

I am fed up of the pouncing on AIBU. It should be renamed 'What do you make of this'?

MsVestibule Sun 31-Mar-13 13:46:25

I hate the 'is this all you've got to worry about, don't you realise that children are dying in Syria?' brigade. Other threads are obviously lighthearted but the OP still get grief about it.

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 13:49:32

I think in the section 'What do you make of this?' the Op should be allowed to not reveal what they think to start with.

AIBU is truly vile. Put a thread in there and you get flamed, put the same thread differently worded in Chat and it tends to go ok.

YABU. Who is it you don't want pounced on? Is it OK to pounce on serious AIBUs? Or is it OK to pounce on unserious AIBUs?

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 13:51:46

I think there are posters who go onto AIBU with the intention of pouncing/flaming whenever possible.

I'm glad this is all you have to worry about, I stubbed my toe earlier, you should try having to deal with that grin

I started a thread in aibu, it was about my mil,and not only did I get some yanbus, but the people who did think iwbu were all polite and nice to me and it descended into an interesting, informative debate.
Never thought I'd see it smile

BarredfromhavingStella Sun 31-Mar-13 13:53:15

YANBU, think it's a very good idea.

Trills Sun 31-Mar-13 13:53:58

Can we have a definition of "pouncing" as opposed to just "replying"?

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 13:54:49

SPB are you sure? I started a thread in AIBU and got accused of being ignorant about Christian festivals. sad

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 13:55:46

I think 'pouncing' is usually a very short, curt reply generally totally unhelpful and flaming the poster at the same time.

Oh yes. I did have to add a huge disclaier in the title though. In what way are you ignorant of Christian festivals?

Yes to "pounce" on this thread would be "fgs op divisive much? Get.a.grip"

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 13:58:40

I said Good Friday was 'odd'. The thread was about some things being open and some not. I was told it wasn't odd and I was ignorant about Good Friday and to get my facts straight.

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 13:59:32

Ooh yes Stealth good pounce example. A snippy question.

confused
Easily confused, really

SPB: your thread had a massive disclaimer though! People shouldn't have to provide disclaimers to keep from being flamed.

No I agree. But we do, because of the po. I was terrifiwd, had taken my life in mg hands grin

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 14:02:43

Good Friday is not odd. It is a Christian festival that, in this country (and others) is marked by a bank holiday. Like Christmas, it is actually a festival celebrated my many who are not Christian, but it is no more odd than Christmas.

Perhaps you should google Good Friday so you are a bit less ignorant about it?

^ ^ Me being educated in AIBU. sad

Sorry, get it now, was confused by the 'open' remarks.
Is this a po thing? I'm seeing it more and more but whether I'm just more noticing it or whather it's more prevalent.

Viviennemary Sun 31-Mar-13 14:10:09

It's a good mix. And if people are very serious they can post in relationships or Health or whatever other appropriate section. But sometimes people take a thread seriously when they aren't meant to. or vice versa.

Viviennemary Sun 31-Mar-13 14:11:11

What's a po. It's like a different language on MN sometimes. I'm way behind.

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 14:12:04

Professionally Offended Vivienne

I find Good Friday odd. What is good about being crucified?

juneybean Sun 31-Mar-13 14:21:40

Well... therein lies another debate versus PO and po ... i.e. Professionally Offended or po-faced.

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 14:22:05

oh don't say that Kiss. shock I only meant it was odd re shops opening. I should have asked why it was called Good Friday shouldn't I?

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 14:22:47

Yes, it could mean either but lately it has meant the former juney.

juneybean Sun 31-Mar-13 14:23:49

That's not what people were saying on Portofino's thread the other day grin

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 14:24:59

Ooh all that stuff was a bit scary juney. sad

BitBewildered Sun 31-Mar-13 14:28:53

Please don't stop it having 'AIBU' in the topic name though, I like saying 'ayboo' in my head. grin

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 14:30:37

Lovely example of a wordy 'pounce' on this thread. sad And it's in Chat. sad

juneybean Sun 31-Mar-13 14:33:58

It's stuff like that which makes me think twice about starting ANY threads never mind AIBU threads.

kim147 Sun 31-Mar-13 14:35:33

That's an impressive pounce. Wonder if people are like that in real life or does the internet bring out the real person.

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 14:38:10

Can you imagine saying that to a stranger in RL kim?

kim147 Sun 31-Mar-13 14:45:15

Just walking down the street and asking someone if they've seen a shop open?

Would you tell them to fuck off, I can't believe you're so disorganised etc etc.

I probably wouldn't. I'm quite nice really.

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 14:48:47

No, I don't generally tell strangers to fuck off kim, unless we didn't get the memo and it's the new thing to do....

kim147 Sun 31-Mar-13 14:50:29

The psychology of internet forums - I bet someone's done a PhD on it.

KurriKurri Sun 31-Mar-13 15:19:49

I think AIBU should have all the replies hidden, so people say what they think based entirely on the posts of the OP.

How your AIBU thread goes is based largely on the replies of the first couple of posters IME, everyone else smells blood and comes in for a feeding frenzy, getting ever more abusive as you go down the thread, so 'I think you are being a bit unreasonable' gradually morphs into 'fuck off you fuckwitted fuck' grin

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 15:35:09

You are not wrong Kurri.

EllieArroway Sun 31-Mar-13 15:44:12

I think calling it "Am I Being Unreasonable?" was a huge mistake. It immediately asks for a value judgement about the askers behaviour and, in some respects, their personality.

Very, very few people can cope with being told "Yes, you're being unreasonable" - whereas being helped to see things in a different light is much easier to take on board.

Sparkling That poster knows little about the history of the Good Friday and Easter holidays. Easter has long been a pagan festival, pre-dating Christianity massively - and GF was just tacked on before it to support Xtian beliefs.

Being called "ignorant" by Christians who know less about the history of their religion than most atheists really, really makes me angry

EllieArroway Sun 31-Mar-13 15:47:20

Also - most people posting AIBU threads don't really think they are, particularly with the more serious issues, so having a load of people saying "Yes - YABU" is hard to swallow. Hence the mammoth (and quite entertaining) bunfights.

Sparklingbrook Sun 31-Mar-13 15:52:28

I explained what I meant by the 'odd' thing Ellie, but I never got an apology for being called ignorant. sad

foxache Sun 31-Mar-13 15:53:34

Kurri, you're right, I hate gang pouncing. Sometimes there seems little point in starting a thread here as you can predict the tiny, irrelevant part of your OP which someone will jump on with a short, one-line rude comment.

Also posters who don't bother to read the whole OP and reply incorrectly and people who won't read the tone of an OP in an understanding way and are unable to distinguish between a hurt whinge and an unreasonable situation angry

Trills Sun 31-Mar-13 16:02:46

most people posting AIBU threads don't really think they are, particularly with the more serious issues

If you aren't open to the idea that at least one person might think you are being unreasonable don't ask.

kim147 Sun 31-Mar-13 16:05:26

Someone suggested a rant thread - where you just rant and no one can disagree with you grin

EllieArroway Sun 31-Mar-13 16:16:05

Trills Totally agree - but they do anyway, because they're pretty certain they're not being. I do feel a little sorry for those who come on saying, "Look, I know I'm being unreasonable but...." and get it in the neck anyway.

We're ALL over-reacting dicks sometimes. Although I never cease to be impressed by the largely non-judgemental, down to earth parenting advice that's often given. I swear that if MN were around when my DS was little, I would have had a happier time of it - and I mean that.

Sparkling And you won't. Not ever.

JustinBsMum Sun 31-Mar-13 16:35:51

I don't think there's a rule

Sometimes I am grumpy and impatient and post similarily or sometimes I am smile and wine.

Also, there are so many posts on many threads that all range of responses are there.

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