AIBU to veto tacky merchandise?(67 Posts)
DD is almost 2 and is starting to get really keen on Peppa Pig. Everywhere we go we hear 'Pebig!!! Pebig!!'
I don't mind her watching it.
I know she would ADORE wearing Peppa P.J's or eating on a Peppa plate- cuddling a Peppa doll or wearing a Peppa backpack- but it makes me cringe with the tackiness of it.
I feel quite mean but I don't know what it is- i just really can't stand tat.
she has plenty of (mostly) wooden toys or nice looking ones eg, schleich, heimess or brio...and loves her drawing easel
I also don't like anything with a slogan or motif (eg. 'Here comes trouble') puke.
Am i depriving her? Or does anyone agree with me?
hahaha she is less than 2 ...good luck in the next few years
choose your battles wisely
If she'd ADORE wearing Peppa Pig pyjamas then why can't she have some? It'll make her happy.
I can't stand tat either but if it makes my child happy I'll put up with it. And it's not all tat. Just pick out the best/nicest of the tat.
Ah, its wonderful when you can control influences.
All I'll say is wait for peer pressure when school starts!
Wooden doesn't always mean better, or that it's not tat, and I say that from my anti-plastic materials stance.
I get what you're saying....we're currently in a 'Hello Kitty' phase at the moment (dd1 is 3.5yo)
Like a pp said, choose your battles wisely. A plastic plate and the odd Tshirt are ok....you don't have to buy all the tat going. And some stuff is actually okay, reasonably cute and well made.
I personally can't stand love hearts on everything. 'Next', I'm looking at you!
This is what you do :
Buy pjs rather than daytime clothes- she will love them, you don't have to be seen out with her wearing them!
Buy cutlery - the picture will soon wear off the handle
But her the smallest cuddly, she will love it & it doesn't have to take up space.
Out of interest, how long do you think you can avoid plastic tat & character Merch for???!
Aw, get her some pjs or a t-shirt, it's not the end of the world. Or a pencil case for her easel maybe?
I dislike the slogan'ed stuff too though.
Your idea of "nice looking" toys will differ hugely from a two year old's perspective. Since when have toys needed to look nice anyway?
My 6 year old is currently obsessed with Trash Packs - little gargoyles the size of your thumbnail with the texture of snot.
It's all ahead of you...
Awww ok... Mummy guilt setting in. I might have to give in with the p.j's....
I compromise with stickers, pyjamas and pants.
PJs are good they out grow them, small cuddlies are OK. Avoid themed plastic play. They are nothing like as well made as happy land, wow or Duplo and you can't add to them.
In principle I agree with you, but in practice my dds love something with peppa or Hello Kitty on, and it makes their day to get the 'tinkerbell plate' at lunchtime
I have some limits and some times when I just go - it's only a plastic plate, what does it matter.
My (unspoken) limits are that I don't buy it on anything I want to last, or major item, in case the enthusiasm wanes. So no duvet covers, or curtains, not usually winter coat, bike etc. But I did once buy a Dora coat because it was the only one I could find that fit. And dd2 has a Tinkerbell lunchbox because I made the mistake of saying she could choose which ever one she liked as long as it was the right shape to fit the lunch and drink into...
and I buy the nice version not the tacky version. Eg there are some very nice clothes, nice pattern colour and design which happen to be Peppa pig, and there are some very cheap tacky sequined tat. I don't buy the tat.
DD1 (15) changed her tinkerbell quilt cover for DD2'S birthday sleep over. She'd never worry about her own friends seeing it. Her friends are lovely, they are grown up when it matters and still eight when it doesn't.
DD2 will do teenage for all of them.
I took my little sister's teletubbies duvet cover to university! Slogan stuff was cool as a kid, and now it's retro! I still love it!
just bought the tackiest hello kitty duvet covet ever this week (alright it was the cheapest in the shop as in the sale) but DD1 is beside herself with excitement about it
i reckon the best £12 ever spent to have her skip to bed and stay there all night
i agree with pick your battles - currently DD2 loves to go out wearing peppa pig from head to toe. yesterday she had peppa clips in her hair, peppa baseball boots, peppa pants, peppa socks and we mutually agreed that the jeans and tee shirt although no peppa logo where the types of things peppa would wear
Peppa pig toys are shit, spindly arms and badly made, definitely don't buy those. Octonauts toys, on the other hand, are great. My DS has had so much imaginative play out of them.
I find myself far more kindly inclined to character stuff when I actually like the programme myself. Also, you have to remember who the toys are for!
Aw she's a baby, let her have some PJs or a plate or something. Wooden toys are lovely but my idea of having only a few carefully chosen lovely toys went out the window pretty quickly when someone pointed out to me that the toys were actually for my children and not just to look nice. They kind of had a mix of both. Agree with the slogan stuff though, can't stand it.
Buy her some peppa stuff for her birthday! It's not about what you like it's about what she likes. You can get some lovely peppa playsets.
I agree with the PJs rather than clothes compromise, the only character clothes DS has are ones which we have been given and they are used as nursery t shirts.
We were never allowed anything with a slogan or tv character as kids. All our toys were ethically this and gender neutral that. We just wanted what other kids our age had and not have to be so worthy about it all.
As a result my kids have had a fair amount of merch, I reckon it's worth it. Yes, ok, it's all shit, but it makes them happy for now.
Good luck. Been there, tried to do that- failed!
I will get her some p.j's... Maybe a plate...
Re; what she likes... Well she has plenty of toys that she does like that don't look like junk.
I have always tried to avoid ugly toys for this reason- they are in my house. Toys have the power to infiltrate a home. Also it's our money that pays for them
We bought her a huge garish pink piano she loves, and i don't have a problem with duplo.
Our friends have 4 boys and that house is completely overtaken by teeny tiny figurines and toys so tacky they probably came in a happy meal... <Shudder>
I feel you pain, I hate (really hate) Minnie Mouse, can't help it she bugs me in a million ways, but dd 18 months likes her - she is always attracted to the Minnie bits in a shop and will point them out and since she is as much of an individual as I am I do allow toys/drinks bottles etc but it drives me bonkers inside - I live withit because before long she will be demanding all sorts that i also don't approve of!
By the way, if you like wooden toys a quick google finds loads of peppa pig ones? A compromise maybe?
Abby- if I were you I would print off this thread and keep it safe somewhere so you will find it in 5 years time. You can read it to keep your mind off the sea of pink plastic your home will have become by then!!!!!!
Yes I was like you 5 years ago <wistful>
Except the toys aren't for you and when I saw dd1's little face light up at the Upsy Daisy top she was pointing at it all went out of the window. It's harmless, makes them deliriously happy and is just a phase. Let the poor little mite have some peppa pig things.
The teeny tiny figures are what children want though. DS is 3 and we have lots of teeny tiny figures because that is what he enjoys playing with, and they are great for allowing him to develop his imagination and to off in a little world.
Just get some proper storage and accept that your daughter is going to have different tastes than you
stiffles a giggle.
It seems I already comply with the mumsnet default setting on this of 'PJs, pants and plates' for brands goods :-)
This thead's rather handy as I'm expecting my first and was assuming I'd only buy lovely wooden toys and carefully chosen educational pieces (!)
It has made me remember the delight I felt when I came home from school and my Mum had decorated my entire bedroom in Strawberry Shortcake - wallpaper, bedding, toys, hot pink curtains, the lot. It looked like Strawberry Shitcake herself had threw up in there. And this was the early eighties when character merchandise was nowhere near so prevalent as it is now so she'd had it all secretly brought over from Canada by a lovely aunt.
Looks like I'm going to have to adjust my expectation a bit, but I think the advice upthread about investing in decent storage is wise.
My son is crazy for Disney Cars. And to a lesser degree, Toy Story (particularly Buzz Lightyear) and Spiderman. We have so much Cars stuff, including a Lightning McQueen bed. He is 3 1/2 and this has been ongoing for a while now, certainly the bed was bought last summer. My 1 1/2 year old daughter likes cats, so Hello Kitty is starting to be quite popular with her.
As for slogans, I
like to wear slogan t shirts myself don't mind some of them, but I don't buy ones that are, IMO, inappropriate such as the "princess" "cutie" "babe" type ones for girls, and I don't like ones with "naughty" etc on them.
On my ds's 6th birthday, I changed his duvet cover and pillow for a Liverpool FC one while he was asleep. He still remembers waking up to it as one of the best moments in his life....l
"Toys so tacky they probably came from a happy meal?"
God forbid, eh?
Your friends with four boys? They think you're a snob.
You sound very sneery about your friend. I bet her boys are very happy.
Op please don't be like that about toys. Don't be so controlling about what your house looks like, especially on the basis that its your money that's paying for it. It's also your dd's home where she is entitled to have things she wants too
Well I hope you soften somewhat for your dds sake, you really only buy toys that you like the look of because it's your money and if might make your house look a bit messy. Jeez controlling much? I thought toys were about learning and enjoyment. You'd better start telling her not to bother writing to Santa as he will bring her what
you he feels is best.
I hate tat, but DD likes it and childhood should be fun. She loves wearing her Peppa Pig rain coat.
most people i know had the same idea
we all have a couple of shelves of beautiful, wholesome, improving wooden toys, which invariably stay on the shelves as the DC prefer to play with some brightly coloured plastic
and agree that it can help to channel their desire for character clothing towards PJs/pants/hairclips, so they're not head to toe in Moshis or whatever
Happy Meals.... Oh fuck, how awfully tacky
Yes, YABU. And a bit of a snob, but perhaps you realise that already.
Toys are for children, yes it's your house and your money but your dd lives there too. I get what you're saying, some of the branded merchandise is truly hideous, but so what if it makes your LO happy. Don't buy the big stuff, its too expensive anyway, but what's the harm in some pjs, plates, hair slides or a few figurines?
The Peppa figures are shit though, the arms break off withing about a minute, get them second hand so its no such a big deal.
my DT have a car theme room, not tacky as I used internet to get nice things but they love it. it makes them so happy. you are an adult such a long time, childhood is a time for fun and some tat. my dh and I had dull bedrooms as children and didn't want the same for our DC. toys wise they have a mixture of wooden and plastic and lots of books, all gets played with
We grew up in a house where we only got to watch ski Sunday and the Attenborough documentaries so no attraction really to merchandise (although there was probably less in the 80s)
People say your kids might feel left out but neither me or my brother did.. we did have plastic toys- playmobil, duplo/lego though. The best 'toy' I remember was access to buckets of drawing & painting equipment and clay/fimo/etc. I'm sure we made enough tat of our own but my parents obviously had great patience (and storage in our rooms for most of the ahem 'creations'!). I'm planning to try to do the same with our ds and any others..
i agree to to apoint.
i refuse to buy character tops, as i think they look tacky, i have seen very few that i have thought where nice.
pjs i dont have a problem with, duvets ONLY if they are more cotton then polly as the duvet just doesnt stay in it and always ends up at the bottom in the morning.
plastic tat.. no problem with it.. long as its sturdy, i very rarely refuse to buy £1 store thing or from store 21 as the toys just fall apart.
When DD1 was 2 we decorated her whole bedroom in Barbie ! Wallpaper, border, curtains, quilt cover, the lot. She is 17 now and still sometimes randomly says "ahhh do you remember my Barbie room!" So look at it as creating childhood memories
My SIL DS was never allowed anything with characters on. I remember him in reception with a grey material bag almost as big as him because she liked it while all around him were Disney cars and Thomas the tank. His clothes were also always really expensive and then she would stress over him getting dirty.
OP Let her enjoy her childhood and you enjoy it because it goes so quick. Mother of teens here !
I wonder if you're a friend of mine? Four boys here and, yes, our house is coming down with tiny plastic figures, Lego men, toy soldiers etc. maybe I missed the parenting memo which informed everyone else that we should be hand carving wooden figures from solid oak. As it is I tend to buy my children the toys they like within reason as playing is supposed to be fun. You sound lovely...
"toys so tacky they probably came in a happy meal" [arf]
The best type of toys. We still (ten years later) have a box of MacDonalds toys hidden away for visitors.
I remember the days when I thought I could influence my children's tastes [nostalgic]
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
Haha- i love the fact that people are calling me a snob? Nice. If all else fails resort to personal attacks right? Clever.
I would assume you are taking it personally and in that case don't. I never said other people couldn't buy tat. I just rather wouldn't.
I agree- storage is key. I will accept a certain amount of tat will makes it's way in but hopefully a balance.
Also love the idea about creativity. When i was a child we had a room under the stairs where mum stored craft things for us. Stamp kits, sewing box and fabric etc. We never got bored good memories.
We also spent a lot of time outside building a treehouse, riding bikes, picking mulberries and making then into jam... I don't seem to remember any toys besides barbie (which i adored) and my baby doll Rebecca who i will be passing on when DD is old enough to not draw on her face
I didn't call you a snob. I said your friends think you're a snob.
They're laughing at your pfb-ness about creating perfect childhood memories, wooden toys, treehouses and jam.
They, having four children already, know the reality of it.
"I know she would ADORE wearing Peppa P.J's or eating on a Peppa plate- cuddling a Peppa doll or wearing a Peppa backpack- but it makes me cringe with the tackiness of it." loosely translates as "Sorry sweetheart, I dont want you to be happy - what might people think if they saw you???"
Oh! I didn't realise you knew my friends? And you are so kindly speaking on their behalf?
Oh please. Don't use your made up insight as a guise to insult me indirectly.
You can translate it as that i don't want my daughter to be happy- but if you were logical you would realise that she has plenty of other toys that make her happy and since when was it a prerequisite for a child's happiness to give them everything they want? Hmmm?
Gosh, you sound lovely
I wasn't calling you a snob, and for what it's worth anyone who says you are snobby for your posts isn't attacking you; they are saying you are snobby about toys. Which you are. It's a statement of fact, not a personal attack.
And anyway, I was simply saying that when you have a 2 year old it is quite normal to think you can have "tasteful" toys.
Come back in five years; I doubt very much your house won't be full of tacky crap.
NO IM NOT!!!
Why start an AIBU when you're so adamant you're not?
Really op wanted everyone to say "gosh, you're right, how dreadfully tacky" not YABU
I think the fact that you're not only referring to toys makes your OP sound quite "snobbish". Surely a back pack is a back pack and if your DD wants a Peppa Pig then why shouldn't she have one (obviously assuming she needs a backpack of some shape, sort or description)? It seems from that that you're putting aesthetics ahead of your DDs happiness. My DS loves a Happy Meal cuddly he got on a rare trip to McDs, he brings it everywhere with him, if he was your DD would you take it off her because it didn't suit your taste?
I am lovely Mary i will take your (assumed sarcasm) as a compliment as I don't think it's wise to sum up a person based on a simple AIBU thread.
I guess i am being a little 'snobby about toys' as opposed to being a snob... I'm sure i can live with that though
No, I'm making my assumption on your last couple of posts. Which include the words "Nice", "Clever" and "Oh please".
All presumably used with a tad of sarcasm.
Which makes you sound, quite frankly, not very nice (no sarcasm there at all).
Having "tat" doesn't stop children being creative or playing outdoors you know!
My Mum was like this. Even if I got money as a birthday present and wanted to spend it on something she considered tat she usually wouldn't let me unless I made a horrendous fuss. So I usually tried to let mine have what they wanted at Christmas. Furbies anyone. That was the biggest waste of money ever.
I have taken on board a lot of the (genuine and non critical) advice-
I guess knowing so many people value tacky crap as a necessary part of childhood is helpful in that I will be more prepared for what is ahead!
And i will be more open to some of these toys knowing it is inevitable...
Again- have a happy (non tacky ) Easter all
I think it's more that we value the happiness of our DCs rather than valuing tacky crap. And no one said they had to have everything
I think you're being a bit sensitive OP. I said you were being a snob in relation to the toys, not as a personal attack. I am sometimes a bit snobbish about things too, but I have tried for DDs sake not to be restrictive of things she would "adore".
She's only young and children don't need a huge abundance of toys, so you do have a level of control in that of course you shouldn't give in to her wanting every piece of characterised or plastic tat she sees, but on the flip side there really is no harm in a few bits and pieces that don't fit in with your ideal and as she gets older you will have less control so its probably for the best to accept that now!
What you will find is that you have no control over some things. So I have avoided backpacks with characters on, especially sparkly pink ones. Then dd2 got given a Tinkerbell backpack. She will not be parted from it and she instantly became an huge Tinkerbell fan, even though she has no idea who Tinkerbell is, and has never seen the film.
My only consolation is that it isn't pink, and is quite a pretty colour. So I could have hidden the backpack and refused to buy anything with Tinkerbell on it, but instead I let her get on with it, and decided it wasn't a battle worth fighting, and she chose a Tinkerbell lunchbox for school.
You make an interesting connection though that all character mechandise it plastic crap and that all plastic crap is character related.
In fact dd2 has a very nice wooden dolls house with wooden furniture. Instead of buying dollhouse dolls, we bought the peppa pig figures on the internet. It is referred to as the 'Peppa Pig House' and she has played with it solidly for 2 years and it has been the source of much creative and imaginative play. By a little creativity ourselves, we have the best of both worlds.
Buy a nice looking basket for all her 'treasures' and then they will be well hidden!
You can have homemade Peppa Pig dolls and cardigans and so on if you can knit or sew. This doll would be good for your dd's age.
Yabu life's too short, she's a child so let her be one. She's too young to understand your reasoning and politics. Get her son peppy pig stuff if tats what she would like. Wooden toys are great but not for every Chidren mabey your dd wants a mixture
It up to you however if you says she would adore something ...would you not get imense joy seeing her so happy? I know I do. BTW mine have cheap £1 snack boxes with Hello Kitty on. DD1 uses hers daily for school, tupperware one used the previous year lasted about 10 mths Hello Kitty is still going strong!!
Ds loves peppa pig - we got a peppa pig bundle on ebay for £25 (rocket, boat, playground sets, school set, train, camper van and lots of figures) and he has the peppa pig house - he plays with the figures (loves dolls houses and the peppa pig house is smaller for our tiny cottage)
He has a peppa pig pencil case also.
I say go with it
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