to call my DS "Tarquin Fin Tim Lim Bin FTang FTang Ole Biscuit Barrell"

(110 Posts)
slippysofa Mon 25-Mar-13 20:01:45

... and expect him to have friends?

YouTheCat Mon 25-Mar-13 20:02:56

That's a beautiful name. grin

ventilatormum Mon 25-Mar-13 20:03:30

think he'd be ok without the Ole - or are you spanish?

Chavvy and common.

ginmakesitallok Mon 25-Mar-13 20:03:53

It rolls off the tongue and has suh lovely initials

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

YouTheCat Mon 25-Mar-13 20:04:41

Or Python?

KatamariDamacy Mon 25-Mar-13 20:07:18

Too silly. How about Kevin Philip Bonggg?

jinxdragon Mon 25-Mar-13 20:07:59

Barrel with one L? Lovely. With two it's just chavvy and horrid, your poor child will be CONSTANTLY spelling his name out for people.

LineRunnyEgg Mon 25-Mar-13 20:09:15

Reginald Maudling is lovely, too.

wonkylegs Mon 25-Mar-13 20:10:16

We had a FTang FTang variant for DS toogrin
Baby brain hormones made me settle for a more regular combination at registration which is a shame as there are at least two others in the class which would never have been a problem if we'd stuck with the original!

Ok, but personally I prefer Zingelbert Bembledack Yingybert Dambleban Zangelbert Bingledack Wingelbert Humptyback Slut Bunwalla..

EggsPressYourself Mon 25-Mar-13 20:11:21

There are two kids in my DS1 class with the same name - I think it's faddy.

NeoMaxiZoomDweebie Mon 25-Mar-13 20:12:43

Yanbu. tis your baby and nobody else should have a say. I have to say though...not too keen on the Barrell bit....could you consider something more normal there? Maybe Tarquin Fin Tim Lim Bin FTang FTang Ole Biscuit BAKER instead?

WorriedMummy73 Mon 25-Mar-13 20:12:51

How about Strangely Brown?

NeoMaxiZoomDweebie Mon 25-Mar-13 20:14:16

DD2 aged 5 is currently lying beside me and she suggests "Mr Knobbly" as a good name for a baby boy. Her opinion should count for something I think.

apostropheuse Mon 25-Mar-13 20:14:49

It's a bit pretentious. Drop the second Ftang perhaps?

TheCraicDealer Mon 25-Mar-13 20:15:34

Perhaps you might want to pronounce "biscuit" like the panda in this ad. Makes it a bit different, know what I mean?

LeggoAcubunnyture Mon 25-Mar-13 20:15:44

There are three of those in our local school. It's the new Jack!

WorriedMummy73 Mon 25-Mar-13 20:16:28

DD wanted to call DS1 'Doogie' (after the dog on Smarteenies - anyone else remember that on CBeebies?). DS1 wanted to call DS2 Peppa Pig (if he was a girl) and Baby Jesus (if a boy).

My suggestion was Megatron for DS2 - I thought it was a strong, powerful name that speaks of leadership qualities. DP did not agree...

lakeofshiningwaters Mon 25-Mar-13 20:16:44

I've taught several of these and they're always naughty...

NeoMaxiZoomDweebie Mon 25-Mar-13 20:16:55

Good idea Craic! She could spell Tarquin like "Tarkwin" too!

Viviennemary Mon 25-Mar-13 20:17:05

What about Tobb. (First letter and last three) That would save a lot of writing.

KoalaFace Mon 25-Mar-13 20:17:55

I read that name out to DH and he laughed his head off. I think it was the Ftang Ftang.

JesusInTheCabbageVan Mon 25-Mar-13 20:19:45

YABU for giving your DS a girl's name. He'll be a laughing stock, poor thing angry

Snazzynewyear Mon 25-Mar-13 20:19:54

Timeless and classic! Love it.

LineRunnyEgg Mon 25-Mar-13 20:22:29

A tad ... Oxbridge?

You might want to consider something a tad more Harvard, like Windsor Lockhard III?

TheCraicDealer Mon 25-Mar-13 20:23:21

Oh god yes, you need some roman numerals in there somewhere. Good spot, LineRunny.

WhoWhatWhereWhen Mon 25-Mar-13 20:24:29

Three of those in my DD school....

cocolepew Mon 25-Mar-13 20:26:10

I'm sure Bippity Flip Flop Moptop IV would love to be his friend.

slippysofa Mon 25-Mar-13 20:26:54

linerunny I can't call him Reginald Maudling. His sister's called that. And his other brother is called Dennis Moore Extra Ord Dinary.

OhDearieDearieMe Mon 25-Mar-13 20:28:17

grin @ 'Kevin Phillips Bonnnnnnnnnnnnnnng'

I'm afraid, OP, that this thread ages you. Unless there's been a revival and I didn't know?

slippysofa Mon 25-Mar-13 20:29:37

I was a very precocious child watching my parents' re-runs on the video in the 1980s.

LineRunnyEgg Mon 25-Mar-13 20:30:28

Pob II.

Too common?

I had a dog called that, just saying ...

OhDearieDearieMe Mon 25-Mar-13 20:31:39

Shit. In that case it just ages me.


I remember when all this was green fields.........

LineRunnyEgg Mon 25-Mar-13 20:32:02

There's always Eric The Half A Bee.

Due for a revival?

YouTheCat Mon 25-Mar-13 20:32:59

What about Mr Badger?

Or Mr Eric Praline?

Bearcrumble Mon 25-Mar-13 20:34:50

Lucifer Trimfone.

StanleyLambchop Mon 25-Mar-13 20:39:58

What is wrong with Jethro. Q. Walrrustitty. Much easier on the ears.

gordyslovesheep Mon 25-Mar-13 20:41:03

call him Spiny Norman or Chief Superintendent Harry Snapperorgans

gordyslovesheep Mon 25-Mar-13 20:42:16


YouTheCat Mon 25-Mar-13 20:43:32

Cardinal Ximinez? grin

gordyslovesheep Mon 25-Mar-13 20:45:18

Dr Bloody Bernofsky?

LineRunnyEgg Mon 25-Mar-13 20:47:20

Cardinal Ximinez?

I don't think that his prep school will be expecting the Spanish Inquisition.

slippysofa Mon 25-Mar-13 20:51:26

line our pet is called Eric the half a bee. But I had to give him up for adoption as we were loving him carn. A. Leeee.

ohdeariedeariedearieme - soz, just kidding. I loved it. Aged 7. Taught me everything I know. Espcially that penises can also be used for peeing. Took me ages to work that one out.

gordyslovesheep Mon 25-Mar-13 20:53:38

cyril connolly????

LineRunnyEgg Mon 25-Mar-13 20:56:35

What a lovely name.

For a pet rat.

slippysofa Mon 25-Mar-13 21:01:35

gordy don't you bring those politicians into my thread. spits spits although wasn't CC quite good? or bad? I dunno, before my time. Just off to the pet shop to buy a parrot.

hermioneweasley Mon 25-Mar-13 21:04:05

May I be the first to suggest "Kevin Luxury Yatch"?

hermioneweasley Mon 25-Mar-13 21:04:24

Or Mr Smoke-too-much

YouTheCat Mon 25-Mar-13 21:07:17

Dd used to go into school aged 6 and declare 'my hovercraft is full of eels' in her best Hungarian accent. So proud. grin

NOBODY expects the Spanish Inquisition! Our chief weapon is surprise...surprise and fear...fear and surprise.... Our two weapons are fear and surprise...and ruthless efficiency.... Our three weapons are fear, surprise, and ruthless efficiency...and an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope.... Our Amongst our weapons.... Amongst our weaponry...are such elements as fear, surprise.... I'll come in again

HamAlive Mon 25-Mar-13 21:08:45


YouTheCat Mon 25-Mar-13 21:09:11

Dave's a girl's name. hmm

slippysofa Mon 25-Mar-13 21:10:58

Is this the right chatroom for an argument?

StanleyLambchop Mon 25-Mar-13 21:11:22

Vivian Smith-Smyth-Smith? Has a nice upper class ring to it??

YouTheCat Mon 25-Mar-13 21:12:18

Esquire, deceased? grin

livinginwonderland Mon 25-Mar-13 21:14:43

Can I just say this is the first time I've been on television?

YouTheCat Mon 25-Mar-13 21:16:13

And now a man with 9 legs...

He ran away.

HamAlive Mon 25-Mar-13 21:21:37

Oh yes, I do apologise.

Fghonn? Pronounced John, obviously.

gordyslovesheep Mon 25-Mar-13 21:22:00

My mum bribed me with ice cream in 1978 to go into a very posh cheese shop in York and ask for Venezuelan Beaver Cheese

IAmLouisWalsh Mon 25-Mar-13 21:22:45

Raymond LuxuryYacht?

LadyIsabellaWrotham Mon 25-Mar-13 21:23:36

What about Frank?

Frank's a nice name.

President Nixon has a hedgehog called Frank.

slippysofa Mon 25-Mar-13 21:25:56

gordy that wasn't down Petergate was it?

And now for something completely different....

I took DS to see The Croods today and one of the script writers is John Cleese.

Would you like a five minute AIBU or the full half hour?

YouTheCat Mon 25-Mar-13 21:26:59

Oh god! Gordy that is brilliant. grin

Did they have any?

How about "Knight Jose Ni" as an alternative, in case he turns out to be a girl?

YouTheCat Mon 25-Mar-13 21:28:39

Or Zoot?

livinginwonderland Mon 25-Mar-13 21:30:40

will you get him an ex-parrot?

slippysofa Mon 25-Mar-13 21:33:47

norks the way this thread is going, it might be the full half hour.

No it isn't.

livinginwonderland Mon 25-Mar-13 21:35:13

yes it is.

YouTheCat Mon 25-Mar-13 21:36:18

That's not an argument.

OhDearieDearieMe Mon 25-Mar-13 21:36:46

Doug and Dinsdale Piranha once nailed my head to a coffee table. True.

slippysofa Mon 25-Mar-13 21:37:22

No. It's just contradiction. A proper argument isn't just saying "no it isn't"

MsTakenidentity Mon 25-Mar-13 21:39:27

OP's nickname choice is probably better than Toilet grin

YouTheCat Mon 25-Mar-13 21:41:32

Yes it is.

No it isnt

LineRunnyEgg Mon 25-Mar-13 21:44:48

That's just automatic gainsaying.

gordyslovesheep Mon 25-Mar-13 21:45:35

It may have been - I was a scrawny 8 year old from Liverpool - the shop assistant sneered at me and I legged it grin my Ice cream though - tutti fruiti !

gordyslovesheep Mon 25-Mar-13 21:46:32

I have tried to persuade my own kids to go into Hotel Chocolate and ask for Crunchy Frog Suprise ...they aren't keen

YouTheCat Mon 25-Mar-13 21:57:53

I reckon my dd would be up for that. I'd probably not have to bribe her much. grin

livinginwonderland Mon 25-Mar-13 21:59:35

yes it is.

RalphGnu Mon 25-Mar-13 22:00:17

It's a naughty boy name.

How about Tarquin Bubbles Bon Bon?

YouTheCat Mon 25-Mar-13 22:00:38

Sounds 'tinny'.

Don't think that would work where we live, shoebox in middle of t'road

DaffodilAdams Mon 25-Mar-13 22:02:44

I like it OP. Very catchy.

slippysofa Mon 25-Mar-13 22:03:18

Crunchy Frog! I'd forgotten about that! Just like Anthrax Ripple.

Blimey, I thought everyone had gone to bed. If they had a bed, rather than just licking the road clean.

This ironing is taking me ages tonight.

YouTheCat Mon 25-Mar-13 22:03:19

You were lucky. We lived in rolled up newspaper in septic tank.

slippysofa Mon 25-Mar-13 22:05:25

Nigel Farage. Now THAT'S unreasonable!

OhDearieDearieMe Mon 25-Mar-13 22:06:54

I think we should have Johnson cold for supper! grin

Maat Mon 25-Mar-13 22:07:32

Biscuit Barrel should be double barrelled.

doyouwantfrieswiththat Mon 25-Mar-13 22:09:31

It's a bit of a mouthful when screaming at him in the local park, but if he's an only child that'll give you more time.

Kveta Mon 25-Mar-13 22:09:45

I prefer throat wobbler mangrove myself.

It'll never fit on the passport you know. You try filling in a form with 20 spaces for your middle name and see how he gets on. It's just cruel I tell you.

cumfy Mon 25-Mar-13 22:16:28

Is he an MP ?

cumfy Mon 25-Mar-13 22:16:53

or just a very clever boy ?

slippysofa Mon 25-Mar-13 22:20:26

Neither comfy he's not even the Messiah. He's a very naughty boy.

Must be an MP then nudge nudge wink wink say no more.

StanleyLambchop Mon 25-Mar-13 22:24:13

Does he haggle?

YouTheCat Mon 25-Mar-13 22:25:15

Don't you oppress me!

slippysofa Mon 25-Mar-13 22:30:38

AIBU to worry that my DS cuts down trees, wears high heels, suspenders and a bra?

LineRunnyEgg Mon 25-Mar-13 22:31:32

Who the fuck would call their child Nigel Farage?

StanleyLambchop Mon 25-Mar-13 22:33:40

AIBU to worry that my DS cuts down trees, wears high heels, suspenders and a bra?

Well what did you expect with a name like Tarquin? You should have given him a nice manly name like Brian.

YouTheCat Mon 25-Mar-13 22:35:44

Nigel Farage's mum.

slippysofa Mon 25-Mar-13 22:40:51

line and you I am crying with laughter.

LineRunnyEgg Mon 25-Mar-13 22:45:51

Mrs Farage should have come on this thread for some better ideas, frankly.

Reginald F'tang Farage. Now that's the name of a Prime Minister.

This thread is clearly full of spam...

...spam spam spam spaaaaaaaaaam

YouTheCat Mon 25-Mar-13 22:56:01

I don't like spam.

LineRunnyEgg Mon 25-Mar-13 23:05:03

We do not approve it here at the Ministry of Funny Walks.

livinginwonderland Mon 25-Mar-13 23:10:41

Bloody vikings.

slippysofa Mon 25-Mar-13 23:17:19

And now for something completely different. A man with three buttocks.

And now, I fear, I must go to bed. Cue: raggedy old man running off into the distance. Te da de da da da Da de da, dee da, dee da, dee DAH!

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