To dislike Brian McFadden

(227 Posts)
madamezouzou Mon 04-Mar-13 13:34:12

There's a quote from him in this DM article where he says:

'They [the kids] have got really terrible northern, Manchester accents. They're really common because of where they live and who they live with.’

AIBU to think that it's just not on to criticise your children- or anyone's children, really- like that? Personal feelings about accents/ "common-ness" (blergh) aside. Imagine how they will feel when they read that some day.

Sounds like he's buggered off to somewhere more glamorous and now regards his old life, and his old family, as beneath him. Not on.


He's been quite unpleasant about his kids before. I get that he hates his ex, but if she's that bad why doesnt he spend more time with the girls.
Ah yes, because he lives on the other side of the world to them.

I have no idea who he is but he sounds thoroughly unpleasant. I hope his children aren't old enough to read his comments.

HoldMeCloserTonyDanza Mon 04-Mar-13 13:40:31

He is an appallingly bad parent.

Sugarice Mon 04-Mar-13 13:40:40

He's a massive twat, this being the bloke who shagged a lapdancer on his stag do before he married KK, he's got some nerve!


SkylarWhite Mon 04-Mar-13 13:41:52

He comes across as vile, immature and a terrible father.

scarletforya Mon 04-Mar-13 13:44:12

He's a wanker. He's from around here where I live so the cheek of him calling someone else common!

Gobshite. He never bothers his arse to see the kids from what I can make out.

Snowflakepie Mon 04-Mar-13 13:46:38

He is appalling, simple. This is all about publicity for his new tour (as a support act, no less) because he is a talentless arrogant twat who shagged around and abandoned his first wife, kids and band because he thought he was better than them. For all that I am not a fan of Kerry, she has never abandoned or slagged off her kids like that. Crawl back under a rock, Bryan. Oh yes, he changed the spelling of his name because he thought it was common with a y. Tells you all you need to know. Vile.

itsallyourownfault Mon 04-Mar-13 13:47:59

He pays little or no child support so he loses his right to comment. He's not exactly class personified himself anyway. Attention seeking at its worst. I can't help but find him sexy wrong!

threerings Mon 04-Mar-13 13:50:09

Can,t stand the toad that is Brian Mcfadden. It,s all to easy for him to slag off the women who has had her problems but has always done her best by her kids. Like feeding,putting clothes on their backs and shoes on their feet. Where was he, living it up on the other side of the world whilst leaving Kerry to get on with it.
He is a nasty bitter jealous turd that should keep his mouth firmly shut. What next for you Brian..... clinging to a gantry for Fathers for Justice in your Batman suit shouting "She done my kids wrong they speak common" You are a knobend. Kerry and her Girls had a lucky escape from you a Father that is clueless on how to hurt his kids feelings so publicly.

DixieD Mon 04-Mar-13 13:51:38

Oh god, he gives me the rage. He is a terrible parent. Abondoned his kids and moved to the other side of the world. Even in his custody battles he was not looking to get them himself. Oh no, that might interfere with his wonderful career in Australia, he wanted his mother to bring them up.
If I couldnt for whatever reason get custody of my kids, I would be moving as close to them as possible. Particularly if they were being brought up by a drug addict, alcholic married to a very dubious character, as Kerry Katona was for many years.

ChipTheFish Mon 04-Mar-13 13:52:24
scarletforya Mon 04-Mar-13 13:53:54

How in fuck he pulled Delta Goodram and Vogue Williams I will never fathom. It's not like he has money either, seemingly he gambled the lot. confused

chicaguapa Mon 04-Mar-13 13:55:10

YANBU. I like the Warrington Manchester accent. I think Kerry has made sure everyone knows what a bad father he is though. So no-one's in any doubt.

Fairylea Mon 04-Mar-13 13:57:44

Can't stand him.. he's like my ex, has every opinion under the sun of how to parent and chooses to live in another country to his children. Utter twat.

I feel really sorry for Kerry k actually. She has made some bad choices in her life but had a terrible childhood and suffers very badly with bi polar disorder but has always been there for her girls. I'm pleased she's managed to turn her life around recently. She's doing well.

RafflesWay Mon 04-Mar-13 13:58:27

I had just finished reading same article when I spotted madams thread.
Vile comment to make about his own dc's. Ok if he doesn't like their accent then there are healthier and more caring ways of addressing same. One day they will read his comments and how will they feel then? Hardly going to fill them with confidence!! Also hope he doesn't have a concert in Manchester coming up on his tour! HAHAHA would love to hear the reaction from the crowd cos I think he is only support act for Ronan Keating if it is the tour I have read about.

Mehrida Mon 04-Mar-13 13:58:45


He is a class A knobber.

That is all.

everlong Mon 04-Mar-13 14:02:26

Nothing wrong with a manchester accent and I'm guessing he knew how common KK was before he got with her.

He's a dick.

MrRected Mon 04-Mar-13 14:04:26


Murphy0510 Mon 04-Mar-13 14:05:30

He's vile.

And talentless

zukiecat Mon 04-Mar-13 14:07:41

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

123oap Mon 04-Mar-13 14:11:05

No you are not being unreasonable. He is a Twat! However, a lot of the facts about the girls are wrong. They live in Surrey.

DesperatelySeekingSedatives Mon 04-Mar-13 14:13:49

YADNBU! He is a vile cunt of the highest order!

KK is a knob, I dont dispute that but if he is that concerned by how their daughters are being raised he should pull his fucking finger out and spend more time with them, build their relationship. But sadly he'd rather use the situation to score points against his ex. Sad fucker.

Also whats with attacking their accent?! Presumably they speak like their mother (not a huge shock- shes actually there for them, he isnt!) who he married and had 2 babies with! If the accent pisses him off so much why he marry someone and make babies with her who speaks that way?!

Their poor girls. Makes me sad how they've been treated. I'm sure their mother loves them loads but their dad?! i wouldnt feel loved i think.

Trazzletoes Mon 04-Mar-13 14:18:01

123 they have recently moved back north.

LaurieBlueBell Mon 04-Mar-13 14:18:22

He is vile, the biggest twattyest twat who ever left twatland.

lolaflores Mon 04-Mar-13 14:18:22

wonder what his own mammy thinks about the sterling gentleman she has raised? I am sure she can walk the streets of the Northside head held high and proud of punch of her darling son. The total tool that he is. I feel sorry for his poor old mum, the shame of him

Writehand Mon 04-Mar-13 14:47:35

It's fun seeing how many other people rate this guy as badly as I do. I can't abide the sorry excuse for a dad. What's always riled me is that when his ex had her various problems he was always out there slagging her off while - at the same time - moving to fucking Australia!!!

He never seems to register that criticising the other parent while not even being in the same hemisphere as his kids disqualifies him. If he cared so much why didn't he stay? His ex could've done with the support.

Kerry Katona, for all her faults, seems to have tried to do her best despite struggling against a lousy upbringing and big mental health issues. Her passionate love for her kids comes over, as does the efforts she makes to stay clean and do better. She's humble & open about her faults, and brave.

He doesn't like their accents? Ferchrisakes!! Why did he marry a woman with an accent he didn't like?

Even in his custody battles he was not looking to get them himself. Oh no, that might interfere with his wonderful career in Australia, he wanted his mother to bring them up.

If I couldnt for whatever reason get custody of my kids, I would be moving as close to them as possible. Particularly if they were being brought up by a drug addict, alcholic married to a very dubious character, as Kerry Katona was for many years.

Absolutely, DixieD!! Kudos for putting your finger right on the button.

We used to worry ourselves sick about my DSD's mother and home situation, and though we couldn't do much unless something big happened we could at least stay as close as poss. By moving to Australia, Bryan McFadden pretty much abdicated as a dad.

kinkyfuckery Mon 04-Mar-13 14:50:26

He is an absolutely useless wanker. Everything I read about this vile excuse for a father makes me want to punch him in the face. I really struggle to imagine how anyone could possibly not dislike him!

Northern accents are on the most part lush. YANBU

lolaflores Mon 04-Mar-13 15:21:24

I also think that his issue with the accents is a deep seated Irish prejudice about sounding "English". I can say that as I have had first hand experience of it. Utter fuckwit that he is.

cant stand the fecker and never have. he's a complete twat... and this is coming from a westlife fan blush i was so happy when he decided to leave. best decision he ever made. why is he still around? cant believe people still like him tbh

he's never been there for his kids and moved miles and miles away as soon as he could. then cheating on kk and turning it around like it was all her fault angry

i like kk... always have done and im so pleased she's turned her life around. i hope it continues

Nancy66 Mon 04-Mar-13 15:37:02

I agree that he is a cock.

however I have lost count of the number of times KK has supposedly 'turned her life around' so I wouldn't count your chickens yet on that one...

threerings Mon 04-Mar-13 15:37:55

Did he ever stop to think how his kids friends will react at school to them. O I see what your dad thinks of you in the article, nice one Brian. I salute kk in all her struggles and battles she can still hold her head high and be proud that she has brought up such lovely kids that love,respect and adore her For all her faults she has made good and is a mum that puts her kids first. You BRIAN should keep your sorry arse under the stone you crawled out from under..

LadyBeagleEyes Mon 04-Mar-13 15:44:59

I remember KK when she was on I'm a Celebrity, she was so totally in love with him and her kids. She won it that year and was really funny and sweet.
I think he destroyed her self esteem when he dumped her and I always wish her luck in her struggles.
He, on the other hand is an arrogant talentless twat, hanging on by his fingernails to his non existent career.

propertyNIGHTmareBEFOREXMAS Mon 04-Mar-13 15:46:59

It's not like Kerry was posh then became not so. He knocked her up twice, what the fuck accent did he expect his dds to have? What sort of a twat is he? Why move to the other side of the world to his children then still think he's entitled to slate the parent who remained there for them? So many questions.

Lottapianos Mon 04-Mar-13 15:54:26

'I also think that his issue with the accents is a deep seated Irish prejudice about sounding "English". I can say that as I have had first hand experience of it.'

Completely agree with this (have Irish family and grew up there). My aunt and uncle are Irish but have lived in London for 35 years and raised their 2 kids there. When their kids were little and developed Cockney accents, this seemed to come as a shock to my uncle who would tell my aunt to 'teach those kids to speak properly'. What a genius hmm

He seems like a grade A scumbag to me. A complete talent-free zone too. I'm not a KK fan but like other posters have said, she is the only one out of the two of them who seems to have done any actual parenting. He sounds really vile.

And not that it matters, but Manc is one of my favourite accents ever smile

shockers Mon 04-Mar-13 15:59:39

I remember her coming out of the jungle and he was there to meet her. She looked stunned and asked why he was there, he replied that he was there because he loved her. You could see the confusion/hurt/hope on her face... she knew it was a publicity stunt on his part.

I don't really follow KK or other slebs, but that moment when he leeched off her success stuck with me as being particularly cruel as he had already been linked to an Australian girl who's name escapes me.

lolaflores Mon 04-Mar-13 16:27:53

Delta DullOne. who wisely moved along not too long ago

lolaflores Mon 04-Mar-13 16:29:26

pianos a lot of time and effort was expended thrashing the English accent out of myself and others upon our return to Ireland as kids. his attitude is not new or surprising. the jumped up fucking gurrier.
KK don't marry your new man, if you are listening. just don't love. you know him 5 minutes, he simply cannot be The One, tyhere have been too many for that to mak,e any sense anymore

cornycruzcampo Mon 04-Mar-13 16:38:31

he is the opposite of Peter Andre.
He really, really can't be bothered about his kids.
The purple gluttonous cock.

FutTheShuckUp Mon 04-Mar-13 16:42:05

Horrible man, always disliked him and hated and still do hate the way the press pulled KK to shreds after falling to pieces when he fucked off with someone else yet he escaped any criticism

propertyNIGHTmareBEFOREXMAS Mon 04-Mar-13 17:36:31

Brian makes the Andre look like a fucking God of parenting.

lolaflores Mon 04-Mar-13 18:05:46

I want to know why he even has a career at this point in civilisation? What is the point of him anyway? amusing as his great bloated face is in perhaps a sideshow aspect, what else does he bring to humanity

emma123ab Mon 04-Mar-13 18:34:05

Brian has let them 2 daughters down big time by never being there he's a total idiot. And I was disgusted with Kerrys mtv show when she was on drugs and had her stepsister minding her kids and looking after everything. But she has come a long way and deserves credit for that. But I really don't like Brian or Kerry and the kids are the ones who suffer.

emma123ab Mon 04-Mar-13 18:42:15

As for Kerry being honest I thought she got caught on video by The NOTW snorting Cocaine and said it was a one off and then had to admit after that she was addicted, I wouldn't call her that honest.

flippinada Mon 04-Mar-13 19:03:14

YANBU. He has the repellent, porcine features of the terminally self-satisfied.

I suppose he does serve some purpose, in that he provides a splendid example of what not to be like.

So, for example, if he does something, all decent people know to do the exact opposite.

flippinada Mon 04-Mar-13 19:05:07

I would like to retract my previous statement, as it's unfair to pigs, who have at least some positive qualities.

Jelly15 Mon 04-Mar-13 19:18:37

He is a horrible, worthless waste of space. He compares himself to Robbie Williams on leaving a sucessful band - what a joke! Robbie has talent and went on to have a sucessful solo career.

I really feel for those little girls with that useless set of parents but at least Kerry seems to love them. I am sure Brian wishes he could wash his hands of them only it would effect his image.

gimmecakeandcandy Mon 04-Mar-13 19:25:53

Agree he is a total knob. He cheated on Kezza on his stag do and she forgave him and he has been shitting on her ever since.

BornInACrossFireHurricane Mon 04-Mar-13 19:31:42

He is a dick of the highest order.

How can anyone be that that thick?

HoldMeCloserTonyDanza Mon 04-Mar-13 19:37:17

Exactly Jelly. At least Kerry tries.

He genuinely couldn't give a fuck about them.

AmberLeaf Mon 04-Mar-13 19:50:06

He is a vile sorry excuse for a man/father.

RedPencils Mon 04-Mar-13 19:56:32

He's a tool of the highest order.
Poor KK to fall for a shit like him. Cheating on his stag do? Class act.

LadyBeagleEyes Mon 04-Mar-13 19:58:15

Is he still mates with the other members of Westlife or do they hate him too?
His leaving the band didn't make a blind bit of difference to their success, did it?

Clayhead Mon 04-Mar-13 20:00:47

Didn't she live in Wilmslow anyway? Very rough area...hmm grin

Notfootball Mon 04-Mar-13 20:36:16

Didn't he try to return to westlife and they turned him down?

He makes shit dads look good.

forehead Mon 04-Mar-13 22:06:25

He is a twat of the highest order. I cannot stand him and i must admit that i was glad when Delta whatsherface dumped him.
He will pay dearly for being such a shit father.

Ginebra Mon 04-Mar-13 22:11:04

He and his mammie are deluded blamers. he cheated on kk with a stripper or a lap dancer (?) and he and his mammie sat on the late late show trashing kerry. what planet are they on??? and in ireland his own accent is far from dublin 4 . no self awareness.

Ginebra Mon 04-Mar-13 22:18:06

Plus, he is from tallaght !!!!! i know that there is nothing wrong with bei.g from tallaght but most people from tallaght wouldnt be labelling any other place common !! (i cant afford a house in tallaght b4 i end up in trouble)

threerings Tue 05-Mar-13 13:20:57

Wow Brian has really surpassed himself " The best thing about being a dad is that you have to grow up when you realise you are responsible for two little maggots" Gosh yet again this is how he speaks about his kids, Can,t he just can,t help himself in being King Tool.....

RubixCube Tue 05-Mar-13 13:30:36

Didn't he slag Kerry off about one of her daughters weight?I think he shoud maybe look at photos of himself through his west life days.He was no skinny minnie himself.Horrible vile man

jellybeans Tue 05-Mar-13 15:03:20

I can't stand him because he cleared off to Oz to start over with Delta, his kids should have come first. Who would move to another country unless they had to? is he seen as a joke over there or is he popular? Puts himself first when it should be the kids.

DixieD Tue 05-Mar-13 15:15:10

Not that I want to defend the cretinous waste of oxegyen but maggots to describe kids is actually a common enough term used in Ireland. It looks bad written down I suppose, but it is a term of affection. My mother called us it and I use it sometimes with my kids, as does DH. Its like calling them messers or scuts. IE you cheeky little maggot/scut said in jest.

Ginebra Tue 05-Mar-13 19:02:12

I have never heard it myself. Tyke, Scamp, chap... and one i hate 'scut' but never heard maggot used as anything other than bait.

Lighthousekeeping Tue 05-Mar-13 19:06:49

If she has managed to keep them in private school they won't be that common. He's vile. I don't know how he pulled Delta either.

Ginebra Tue 05-Mar-13 19:13:51

he's just clutching at straws looking around for things to criticise. he doesn't know them well enough to find anything real. My own x thinks i have delusions of grandeur because i pursued maintenance instead of carrying on claiming benefits. how's that for a criticism? i had delusions of grandeur and was petty and vindictive to attempt to see him bear some of the responsibility of parenthood.
i think this is why it's so easy to hate brian, there's a little bit of him in my x, or a bit of my x in him/ . my x's mummy thinks he's a victim of cold-hearted Ginebra.

Wishfulmakeupping Tue 05-Mar-13 19:31:37

He's a vile knob, always thought it was disgraceful the way he left those kids. How he has the barefaced cheek to pick apart kk parental skills from afar is a joke he really is an utter twat- who slags off their own children- WHO DOES THAT?!

cornycruzcampo Tue 05-Mar-13 22:10:43

I didn't know that he and his mother went on the telly and slagged of KK shock how rude!
I can't imagine them two being at the top table when his daughters marry....

MoleyMick Tue 05-Mar-13 22:39:52

I'm in Australia and he pops up everywhere, I can't bear him and I have always felt very sorry for kk and those girls.
Brian m has a well documented "bromance" with Kyle Sandilands here, a horrendous mysoginist who has been disgraced a number of times and was the one who interviewed that 14 year old rape victim live on air with some utterly dreadful questions. That they are best mates days a lot.

TraceyTrickster Wed 06-Mar-13 02:15:18

You lot are lucky. He is on bloody TV where you least expect him here in Aus.

He was engaged to a local golden girl, Delta, got his face known/few stints on TV and then they split. Cynical , moi? I loathe the bloke

Wonder if he can meet someone who is big in Antarctica?

StuntGirl Wed 06-Mar-13 02:33:25

They're both pretty abysmal parents but given he fucked off and abandonded them he doesn't actually even qualify as a parent. Or a human being tbh. Twat.

Ozziegirly Wed 06-Mar-13 04:20:09

Unanimous then - Brian is a twat who we all hate.


Thumbwitch Wed 06-Mar-13 04:26:49

I don't even have to read the article to agree with you. I can't STAND him. He was a judge on Australia's Got Talent and was an utter twat on there, ALL the time.

anonymosity Wed 06-Mar-13 04:51:39

I thought he spent several years trying to win custody of his two girls and travelled back and forth between Australia and the UK to do so?

flippinada Wed 06-Mar-13 08:04:33

If you want to get custody of your kids, moving to the other side of the world would tend not to go in your favour, I should imagine.

DixieD Wed 06-Mar-13 08:13:32

Yes, he tries to win custody, but on the basis his Mammy would bring them up. Not him, oh no. Far too busy to bother with his own children.
I am surprised you haven't heard it Ginebra maybe its more colloquial than I realised. Never heard the expression 'acting the maggot'? Its definitely very common out my way (North Dublin).

jeanmiguelfangio Wed 06-Mar-13 09:04:59

Yanbu class a bell piece. I cannot for the life of me understand why people like this make it public. We don't live in the Stone Age it's easy to look things up and comments never disappear. I feel so sorry for those little girls.

Whatsdoneisdoneisdone Wed 06-Mar-13 09:05:11

He's a prick. He looks like a self satisfied slug with a beard.

I can't believe anyone likes him.

CelticPixie Wed 06-Mar-13 10:08:26

He's a shithead. A crap father who should probably be castrated to to prevent him ever breeding again.

I think he is to blame for a lot of Kerrys's problem as well. She had a very troubled upbringing but found happiness and stability with Brian and then he went and buggered off to Australia to shack up with some tart from Neighbours. He broke her heart.

MarmaladeTwatkins Wed 06-Mar-13 11:14:36

Oh YANBU. He is just a very poor excuse of a man.

Kerry stuck with him through his fat minger years then he loses a few pounds and grows a shit beard and off he fucks with someone else. That is pretty low but hey ho, people leave their spouses because they've fallen for someone else. Happens every day. But what is inexcusable is slagging off your own kids and slagging off the other parent who is present, whatever her misgivings.

He is a prick. A BIG PRICK.

Can someone email this thread to his PR people? He might learn a thing or two. Agree he is a complete and utter cockbag.

Slagging your ex off in public is bad form but slagging your kids off is the work of a real bottom-feeder.

The rest of Westlife must be falling about laughing at him comparing himself to Robbie. What a wanker!

lolaflores Wed 06-Mar-13 11:47:26

COCKBAG, superb. Is there a language on the face of the planet to describe the moral line he has gaily leaped over?
He said what he missed most in australia was "having the banter in the pub with the lads then popping into the bookes for a quick bet"
Not, funnily his children even getting a look in there.
Thought bookies were common though. Ones turf accountant is much classier.
He is punting a new album or some shit..."THe Irish Connection"
I mean....what is that even...what!!! He doesn't even live there anymore.
Is that like the french connection but not talent, style or wit?
I remember that footage of those twats on the late late....even I couldn;t watch him lumbering around with the rest of them.
But, yes. COCKBAG. yes.

Thumbwitch Wed 06-Mar-13 11:49:24

Just read the rest of the thread.

Jellybeans - his image here is none too hot, either - he's far too up his own arse and the afore-mentioned bromance with Kyle Sandilands hasn't done him any favours. Reading the tweets about him while he was on Australia's Got Talent suggested that he's about as popular as a bucket of cold sick. BUt then he was only tolerated here while he was with Delta Goodrun - now that's dead in the water, he's just so much useless flesh hanging around the place.

He is touring here as a support act to Ronan Keating - and we noticed the other day that their concert most local to us (second biggest city in NSW) has been cancelled. We snorted and sniggered and reckoned it was due to lack of sales! (but we don't know, it's only speculation)

Snazzynewyear Wed 06-Mar-13 11:52:11

Utter cock. I feel very sorry for his daughters. Don't really understand what Delta Goodrem ever saw in him (or any other woman come to that).

MarmaladeTwatkins Wed 06-Mar-13 11:57:46

I've just listened to that "Drunk In The Bar" song.

WTF?! I would have laughed at it if the lyrics weren't so ominous. It is surely up there with Alex Reid "The Reidinator"s Stardust.

MarmaladeTwatkins Wed 06-Mar-13 11:58:17

And Gazza's "Geordie Boys"

DesperatelySeekingSedatives Wed 06-Mar-13 12:00:56

I think I watched a documentry a few years ago featuring KK and her brood (as well as her second awful choice of husband!) and thought all of her children came across very well, despite the chaos that surrounded them. They were all sweet natured, well mannered children and the eldest (Molly?) was an absolute sweetheart.

So maybe I should take back my comments about KK being a knob? Despite her demons shes managed to raise (ok with the help of nannies!) 4 lovely children. With zero help from their useless dads. Brian McNoBrain should be proudly puffing out his chest when talking about his lovely daughters. Not talking about feeling embarrassed by how their accents sound hmm sad

Cherriesarelovely Wed 06-Mar-13 12:23:05

UGH. Horrible man.

AllYoursBabooshka Wed 06-Mar-13 12:25:43

FFS! I just made the mistake of looking at those lyrics Marmalade (Or Marm-O-Lad as that's how I say it in my head)

It's a Christmas ball of flashing lights.
You're the nights bright wonder.
Your sex comes crashing into sight,
Breathing lustful thunder.

Her sparkly sex comes crashing into sight? Is he talking about a Vajazzle? confused

Read the rest of this poetic genius here

Ginebra Wed 06-Mar-13 12:32:19

I agree that Brian is to blame for kerry's problems. she'd had a rough childhood with no love and a drug addicted mother. then brian swans in, leaves her with two kids and fucks off not only breaking her heart but issuing character assassinations on her !!!! That must have been like a formula to BREAK her. She was held together with sticky tape.

Poor Kerry. Well, I hope that she keeps the wankery men out of her life and marches to the beat of her own drum. No.more.wankers.Kerry.

AnyaKnowIt Wed 06-Mar-13 12:37:12

Do you think we could get him on to do a webchat?

SherbetVodka Wed 06-Mar-13 12:37:44

Didn't he slag Kerry off about one of her daughters weight?

Oh I really hope that's not true as it could be quite damaging for a young girl to know that her dad's publicly said that she's got a weight problem. Very insensitive of him if he did say this sad

MarmaladeTwatkins Wed 06-Mar-13 12:38:04

It is a cringefest isn't it, Babooshka? I am actually cringeing!

"Oh yeah, here we go again.
Everybody looking at you, looking like a ten.
All messed up no place to go.
Flirting on the dance floor,
putting on a show .
So far you're killing at the bar,
getting really trashed
still looking like a star.
Even if you go too far
I love you just the way you are."


AllYoursBabooshka Wed 06-Mar-13 12:52:18

I just cannot believe that no one turned to him and said in all seriousness...

"Brian, this song is really shit. You're a Ballbag and shouldn't be allowed near a recording studio"

He's had four albums of CRRRRRRRRRIIINGGEEE.

LadyBeagleEyes Wed 06-Mar-13 12:55:27

Has he really had 4 albums.
Did any of them sell any copies?
And whatever happened to Delta?

MarmaladeTwatkins Wed 06-Mar-13 12:57:42

Four?! WTAF???

Has he self-funded them or something? I am so embarrassed for him. They read like lyrics that a 14 year old scrawls in the back of his English folder when he is daydreaming about being a popstar instead of doing what he should be doing.

AllYoursBabooshka Wed 06-Mar-13 12:59:50

Yes, four! I can't imagine who buys them.

As for Delta I assume she woke up one day, realised she was engaged to Brian McFadden then ran away screaming.

SinisterBuggyMonth Wed 06-Mar-13 13:05:00

Wow, I didnt think much of KK until I read this thread, its totally changed my opinion of her, she's doing well considering what that ARSE did to her.

love Manc accients too

AlistairSim Wed 06-Mar-13 13:05:49

I can't abide the man.

He's a talentless meat-puppet.

MarmaladeTwatkins Wed 06-Mar-13 13:07:56

"As for Delta I assume she woke up one day, realised she was engaged to Brian McFadden then ran away screaming"


Poor Delta.

What about this Vogue character? I don't know how your brain must work to be want to be involved with a man who publicly slags his ex and kids off.

AllYoursBabooshka Wed 06-Mar-13 13:17:26

Poor girl was raised by people who looked at a baby and thought "Lets call her Vogue, like the magazine!"

I'm sure she will have her "Uh Oh" moment too, hopefully before she has a child with him.

MarmaladeTwatkins Wed 06-Mar-13 13:28:52


AllYoursBabooshka Wed 06-Mar-13 13:33:09



LessMissAbs Wed 06-Mar-13 13:40:09

What does he do for a living?

Surely dating women in the public eye and self-funding albums that don't sell can't bring in much money? Does he live off these women and "manage" them then? I remember how he was waiting for Kerry when she won I'm a Celebrity, then dumped her once her sheen had dulled slightly.

Why doesn't Kerry pursue him for child maintenance?

I cannot think of anything more likely to cause upset to someone rather sensitive like Kerry than being publicly dumped by her first husband and father of her two children.

What a badly brought up man.

DioneTheDiabolist Wed 06-Mar-13 13:49:24

He is a vile, talentless publicity whore with no morals. He doesn't care a jot for those children and never has.

He's a twat. How anyone likes him, I do not know.

LeftLuggage Wed 06-Mar-13 14:03:47

He released this song a few years ago. Deluded tosser! Classic bits in bold

("Drink some English tea" arf WTAF??)

Real To Me

Showbiz dinners and the free champagne,
Men in suits who think they know it all
No one knows me but they know my name, That's not real to me

Hotel lobby to the airplane, Another country but they start to look the same
Watch the world behind a window pane, That's not real to me

When I see my babies run, When all the madness has been and gone
I raise my family and live in peace, Now thats what's real to me
Real to me.

Dying flowers in a dressing room,
A dangerous time to let your head make up its own mind
Got me thinking that the spirits flown,
That's not real to me

When I see my babies run, When all the madness has been and gone
I raise my family and live in peace, Now that's what's real to me

Picnics in the garden and the children they can play,
The first day of the summer and I'll laze here all the day
We'll invite the family round and drink some English tea,
Then I raise up my finger and watch football on t.v

When I see my babies run, When all the madness has been and gone
I raise my family and live in peace, Now that's what's real to me
That's what's real to me
Wake up you might be dreaming, Wake up you might be dreaming now

MarmaladeTwatkins Wed 06-Mar-13 14:12:18

Oh LeftLuggage, thanks for the laughs! grin

"We'll invite the family round and drink some English tea,
Then I raise up my finger and watch football on t.v"

God I just want to punch his stupid potato face right in. The idiot. I am cringeing like buggery. That was painful to read! Am off to find some more!

So it's unanimous. Brian McFadden is the Worst Father On The Other Side Of The World ™

MarmaladeTwatkins Wed 06-Mar-13 14:17:05

Oooh this is a big load of old shit isn't it?

"Sorry Love Daddy"

"Sorry Love Daddy"

It seems like only yesterday
I held you in my arms and said
You will never need to fear the dark
But unforeseen misery has come
Between your Mommy and me
And we can love you more, now we are apart

Daddy, he's got to go away
Coz there's just no other way
To live this through
Someday, you'll learn to understand
This wasn't what I planned, for me and you
Sorry, love Daddy

Everyday is filled with pain
But never feel that you're to blame
Sometimes life breaks, in mysterious ways
I can't make it up to you
Believe me I am trying to
No matter what you'll always be my babies"

What?! No mention of Delta here in this song, Brian! Nor any mention of you moving just about as far away as you can from your babies. You tool. How exactly are you trying to make it up to them?! By calling their mother names and saying they are fat common?! Hmmmm. hmm

I bet his PR person said "Brian we really need to get you a song written that will make your 2 fans think that you're not a massive arsehole. You've dumped your wife and left your kids for an Australian poplet. Damage limitation is what we need..."

MarmaladeTwatkins Wed 06-Mar-13 14:18:44

Lula, he is Peter Andre's Nemesis. This man does not love his kids. Peter Andre's Love For His Kids - there is more love for his kids in one strand of Pete's hair than in Brian's whole body for his kids.

Perhaps a new reality show is in order? Peter Andre teaches Brian to be a better dad? <rings ITV4>

MarmaladeTwatkins Wed 06-Mar-13 14:25:28

"Irish Son"

OK am actually shaking with laughter now.

"I was born in the heart of Dublin
Back when being gay wasn't cool
Made get on our knees every Sunday with the other fools

We were warped by the Christian Brothers
In the cell blocks at our schools
Get a hand print on your skin
Before you break their rules

Go hit me now
That I'm twice your size
Brushed off the accusations
And bowed before your lies

This is the city that raised me
With the religion they gave me
Now I'm old enough to know my own mind
And it was leaving that saved me
I seen so much that has changed me
Just break with your past
Feed your own mind
This Irish son has moved with the times

Weddings deaths or baptizing children
That's my debt paid to the church
I don't need that kind of salvation
When I get hurt

Don't fill my head with sermons
And force me to believe

This is the city that raised me
With the religion they gave me
Now I'm old enough to know my own mind
And it was leaving that saved me
I seen so much that has changed me
Just break with your past
Feed your own mind
'Cause this Irish son has moved with the times

Our father who art in heaven
Come down here and make your presence known
We can't do it on our own
The lunatics let run the asylum
How can we find peace inside your home
When you can't trust your own

This is the city that raised me
With the religion they gave me
Now I'm old enough to know my own mind
But it was leaving that saved me
I've seen so much that has changed me
So just break with your past
Feed your own mind
'Cause this Irish son has moved with the times
'Cause this Irish son has moved with the times!"


corlan Wed 06-Mar-13 14:35:38

I never thought I'd see the day when the whole of MN agree on something.

(Oh, and YANBU - he's an utter gobshite!)

flippinada Wed 06-Mar-13 14:38:33

Those lyrics are priceless.

Is anyone else reminded of that awful Peter Kay character?

LadyBeagleEyes Wed 06-Mar-13 14:40:42

Loving the Brian hate on here.grin.
Wish KK would come and join us.

MarmaladeTwatkins Wed 06-Mar-13 14:43:31

Oh dear. Here is a very poignant one called "Auf Weidersein Bitch"

"Oh babe I was feeling so horny
The night became a porn movie
Your performance was phoney
Auf Wiedersehen bitch.
Driving in a hired van
Down the autobahn
Flat out doing 82
We got out for some sour kraut
And a walk about
Then the devil came into view
She must have smelled my money
Cause her nipples were hard
It only took a week before she maxed out my card
Kicked her off in Di¼sseldorf
Then her next day off she appeared in Tokyo
Even though she was just a ho
I could not let go
She wouldn't listen to me when I said
Oh babe I was feeling so horny
The night became a porn movie
Your performance was phoney
Auf Wiedersehen bitch
Back off don't u try to control me
I'd rather die and be lonely
Got my hands to console me
Auf Wiedersehn bitch
She licked my man
Like it was marzipan
Like a German can
It was sehr gut, Danke Shon
Things went bad cause she went mad
She even told my dad
When she saw other girls hanging around
She's only here on Wednesday
And she thinks she's my wife
Went rooting through her hand bag
Shit myself there's a knife.
Oh babe I was feeling so horny
The night became a porn movie
Your performance was phoney
Auf Wiedersehen bitch
Back off don't u try to control me
I'd rather die and be lonely
Got my hands to console me
Auf Wiedersehn bitch"

grin Oh Brian you are so gangsta.

LadyBeagleEyes Wed 06-Mar-13 14:48:36

You made that up surely Marmalade grin
I love some of the rhyming. particularly
'we got out for some sour kraut
and a walk about'.
That's genius that is.

Filibear Wed 06-Mar-13 14:53:37

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

'She licked my man
like it was marzipan'?

What she took one taste of it and vommed over your thighs?

MarmaladeTwatkins Wed 06-Mar-13 14:56:14

Sadly not sad

It makes Razorlight's "I met a girl, She asked me name, I told her what is was" line look like something written by John Lennon.

It sounds like a Flight Of The Concords song.

MarmaladeTwatkins Wed 06-Mar-13 14:59:27

Nooooooooooooooo! The Conchords would never be so misogynistic as Brian McFatten!

Isittimeforgin Wed 06-Mar-13 15:05:07

Oh dear god marmalade - please tell me that's not a real song?? shock I have just snorted out loud in front of complete strangers reading those lyrics grin

TheCrackFox Wed 06-Mar-13 15:05:58

Marmalade - come on, own up, you must have made that up. I am shaking with laughter as it is just so dire.

Brian is a talentless arse.

MarmaladeTwatkins Wed 06-Mar-13 15:12:07

Fuck off! grin Even I could write a better song than that! It is AWFUL.

Honestly, I think that my vagine would seal shut if it transpired that my husband had written... and SUNG...

"She licked my man
Like it was marzipan
Like a German can
It was sehr gut, Danke Shon
Things went bad cause she went mad
She even told my dad
When she saw other girls hanging around
She's only here on Wednesday
And she thinks she's my wife
Went rooting through her hand bag
Shit myself there's a knife.

How could you find a man who wrote those lyrics sexually attractive? And I am assuming that he wrote them. There isn't a professional songwriter on earth who would admit to writing that.

Oh. My. That's just tooooo funny <weeps>

Those lyrics. My head! And Marmalade telling people to Fuck Off because they accuse her of making up the lyrics.


Must remember to say OP YANBU - he is King Twat of Twatsville

<weeps some more>

MarmaladeTwatkins Wed 06-Mar-13 15:24:38

If you want to check out Brian's exemplary acting skills...

Am loving the bit at 2:35 when he sings "Watch football on Teeeee Veeeee" in the style of a power ballad.

LadyBeagleEyes Wed 06-Mar-13 15:28:58

This is better than a Peter Andre thread.

FannyFifer Wed 06-Mar-13 15:39:17

This thread makes me like Peter Andre and his sweet orange love for his kids.

McFadden has a face you would never tire of punching.

Has a cheek calling anyone common never mind his own kids, far from D4 u were reared Bryan you utter knob.

MarmaladeTwatkins Wed 06-Mar-13 15:40:15

Peter Andre has been usurped as our Figure of Hate.

I am sure he will be gutted.

Any threads relating to McFadden News must have the PotatoFace Klaxon pre-cursor. wink

MarmaladeTwatkins Wed 06-Mar-13 15:43:33

Have you actually watched the video to "Real To Me" that I linked to just?!

You must.

So what Brian is saying is that this life of playing sell-out stadium tours and being chased after by hoardes of screaming fans is not real to him. He does not want it. Well fucking good job Bri', cos you haven't got it, have you? You're supporting another little has-been twat on his solo tour. I bet the only people you get mobbed by are a few Westlife Nans from back in the day, who preferred you when you were chubby with those awful bleach blond curtains. You are not living the life of fucking Bono so stop complaining like you are. You wazzock.

FannyFifer Wed 06-Mar-13 15:45:13

Someone should tweet this thread to KK. grin

LadyBeagleEyes Wed 06-Mar-13 15:48:20

She wanted a fuck
But I was eating my duck
which caused a ruck.
My added lyrics to his gangsta song.

MarmaladeTwatkins Wed 06-Mar-13 15:49:22

I don't think that KK would like it if we did sad She does seem to maintain a bit of moral high ground when it comes to slagging off Bri'. No idea why though. I would have been setting up Facebook pages about his fat days and all sorts had I been in her shoes...

lolaflores Wed 06-Mar-13 16:03:42

This is priceless work people. at the least let his PR read it and give them time to adjust their trajectory right up his fundament, though is there any room left in there. Mind you if they have an evil flip plan, to make him so bad he is good (like men on death row suddenly exuding sexual allure) they are on to a winner. Though they might want to rethink the shots of him on the front of his latest offering going a bit Julio Iglesias 1981 in a tux with the dickie bow undone. all dishsevelled yet somehow sophisticated. YOur mum might like it...just.

BridgetBidet Wed 06-Mar-13 16:09:38

He is an arsehole. However I have to disagree about KK. She is no better. She made a living out of banging on about how terrible her childhood was because her mother took drugs and had dodgy boyfriends then did exactly the same.

I've been horrified by some of the things she's admitted to. She said that she used to lock herself in her bedroom suite for days on end getting off her face on coke whilst her kids were in the house but she thought that was okay because she employed a nanny. She said the kids were calling to her through the door and she wouldn't reply or open it because she was so off her nut.

And I don't buy this 'oh Mark Wright made me take it' stuff because nobody can force you. At least she is clean now but she has another dodgy criminal boyfriend and I have to say I wonder how long her being clean will last.

And it was common knowledge she had a serious drug problem but that dick Brian didn't come back and rescue his kids from the situation, he's such a fucking wanker.

I feel sorry for those poor kids with parents like that.

cornycruzcampo Wed 06-Mar-13 16:14:25

But did the lady that licked his man like marzipan? Sadly Brian wasn't clear, although I'm guessing that the answer is no.

lolaflores Wed 06-Mar-13 16:16:48

Well, from my varied experience of men and their little chaps, not one tasted like marzipan though a few certainly looked like it. I mean, the complex he must have about himself to compare it to marzipan! I fear he may be beyond all hope at this point.

cornycruzcampo Wed 06-Mar-13 16:18:33

Like one of those little marzipan eggs from an Easter cake perhaps? Poor Brian.

what i always wonder is, who is it that likes this weasle face dead beat dad

he is a pathetic excuse for a man and certainly is not a father.
any man that moves the other side of the world, is vile let alone when its a well known fact his ex who has the children is a drug addict

and as for commenting on his childrens accents, how very damaging for his children


AllYoursBabooshka Wed 06-Mar-13 16:44:58

For some strange reason I read "who is it that likes this weasel face dead beat dad" as

who is it that likes this weasel with the dead face of a bat

Bloody dead bat face weasel man that he is.

cornycruzcampo Wed 06-Mar-13 17:01:02

Dead bat face weasel man with a marzipan man.

AllYoursBabooshka Wed 06-Mar-13 17:06:32

Dead bat face weasel man
With a marzipan man
And a head like a ham
Or Fireman Sam

Quick Brian! Lyrics for your new single!

japonicabumsplatt Wed 06-Mar-13 17:12:52

well, if that doesn't get him into the top 10, his rightful place, nothing will

EarlyInTheMorning Wed 06-Mar-13 17:25:54

MarmaladeTwatkins you've made me cry with laughter.

MarmaladeTwatkins Wed 06-Mar-13 17:26:45

Who actually calls their cock "my man"?

Sadly there is no accompanying video to this song. I know. I've been searching YouTube for the last hour sad

cornycruzcampo Wed 06-Mar-13 17:31:59

We could make one .... With marzipan figures.

AllYoursBabooshka Wed 06-Mar-13 17:42:09

Don't Google "marzipan penis".

Actually, do

cheeseandchive Wed 06-Mar-13 17:55:49

<crying with laughter>

best thread I have read in a long time

oooh, 'thread' and 'read' rhyme. I'm off to tell Bryan - he'll probably want to use them in his new single!

lottieandmia Wed 06-Mar-13 17:58:59

He sounds like a total arsehole.

flippinada Wed 06-Mar-13 17:59:22

Thank you all for making me laugh like a drain.

DS thoroughly enjoyed the "head like a ham" lyric and asked me to repeat it, twice grin

Oblomov Wed 06-Mar-13 17:59:47

"Brian makes the Andre look like a fucking God of parenting. " grin

japonicabumsplatt Wed 06-Mar-13 18:04:39

Lets put out a hand to him...a cookie dough hand. He seems happiest with confectionary symbolism. Or we could do a marzipan porn animation? Marzipan and sour kraut he would looove that. With a northern voiceover.

StuntGirl Wed 06-Mar-13 18:08:39

Oh god, I'm dying with laughter at those lyrics - are they real?!?! Christ on a bike...who is funding this man's vanity projects?!

MarmaladeTwatkins Wed 06-Mar-13 19:01:43

I am now singing "Head like a Ham" to the tune of Nine Inch Nail's fucking excellent "Head Like A Hole" Thanks for that!

AllYoursBabooshka Wed 06-Mar-13 19:21:10

grin I love that song.

Head like a hammm
Covered in jammm
I'de rather dieeee
Than admit that it's Spam

cornycruzcampo Wed 06-Mar-13 19:51:44

sadly there are no books available by ham head on amazon
<wistfully remembers PA's reviews which were absolutely not written by MNers>

Snowme Wed 06-Mar-13 20:08:47

Kerry Katona sold her soul a few times over just to keep her children in a good school and with a roof over their heads and (as far as I know, I don't watch many reality shows) she's kept them out of the media. She's to be applauded in my mind. She comes across with true Northern grit.

And I bluddy love a Northern accent, me smile

Snazzynewyear Wed 06-Mar-13 21:16:03

Just read his Wikipedia entry and of all the madness there, the following sentence leapt out at me:

'After joining [Westlife], he changed the spelling of his name Brian to Bryan to make it easier to sign autographs'

Eh? Why is a y so much easier to write than an i? You can do both in joined up writing, surely? Presumably the author of the entry didn't want to put 'to make him sound more cool' (or perhaps 'kool').

Real To Me was number one in both Britain and Ireland, too. The shame. The lyrics annoyed me hugely at the time. English tea (who SAYS that?) and what have you. Hmph.

MarmaladeTwatkins Thu 07-Mar-13 09:47:47

"'After joining [Westlife], he changed the spelling of his name Brian to Bryan to make it easier to sign autographs'"

<creases up> grin

This is what we're dealing with here. A massive himbo, worse than Pete because whilst Pete was a himbo, he wrote Insania which pisses all over Auf Weidersein Bitch AND he is an exemplary father. Brain could only hope to be a quarter of the man that Pete is.

EarlyInTheMorning Thu 07-Mar-13 10:08:05

I love that some earlier on this thread said he's got a potato face
He so does

MarmaladeTwatkins Thu 07-Mar-13 10:11:04

That was me Ithangeweverymuch!

EarlyInTheMorning Thu 07-Mar-13 10:12:43

Marmalade I think you are my hero

Potato face potato face potato face
so true

MadamGazelleIsMyMum Thu 07-Mar-13 10:15:14

YANBU. Knob of the highest order.

And those lyrics have made me wee a tiny bit.

Please, PLEASE someone tweet this thread to his PR people.

I have to agree that Bryan/Brian is scum, I have to take exception to some of the comments posted on this thread, IMO they are out of order and uncalled for.
What have ham, potatoes and twats ( plus all the other names used) done to deserve being used in the same sentence (and as an insult) as that thing? grin
PS Bryan if your man tastes like marzipan. You need to wash it, you dirty bastard!

UnknownGnome Thu 07-Mar-13 10:27:19

I love this thread! Those lyrics! I love how he's incorporated some gcse german into his song. Showing off his intellectual side there! Though he's missed a trick, if I may make a slight improvement...

She licked my man
Like it was marzipan
Like a German can
It was sehr gut, danke shon
She really got me off
Wo ist der bahnhof?

I'll await my royalties Bry grin

MarmaladeTwatkins Thu 07-Mar-13 10:40:17

What is "Like a German can"? I found myself pondering this at 3am this morning...

LadyBeagleEyes Thu 07-Mar-13 10:48:58

Yes Marmalade, what is a German can?

MarmaladeTwatkins Thu 07-Mar-13 10:51:40

I have no idea. Shall I tweet Bri and ask him?

MarmaladeTwatkins Thu 07-Mar-13 10:57:52

This little ditty is called "Lose Lose Situation" and it is from the seminal (seminal as in covered in semen, not seminal asin groundbreaking) album Wall of Soundz (playing with the spelling again there Brian, I like what you're doing)

"Lose Lose Situation"

When we fall out I like to go driving in my car
Listen to something ironic and end up in a bar
Get an ear full of shit from a stranger who's got a broken heart
Weighing up what would be more painful
Staying with yer man or going back to her

Doesn't everybody feel this way sometimes?
It's a lose, lose situation for a shitty little crime
You can never win with women
Its pointless trying to try
It's a lose, lose situation until the day you die

Everybody knows the score
She'll be crying to the mother in law
Then I'll be sleeping out with the dog
Must give Inter Flora a call

Then we make up I'll be walking on egg shells for a day
I'll clean the house in the hope that I might get a lay
I think back to that drunken stranger, something that he said
"You made your bed so lie in it she'll be quiet when your dead"

Doesn't everybody feel this way sometimes?
It's a lose, lose situation for a shitty little crime
You can never win with women
Its pointless trying to try
It's a lose, lose situation until the day you die"

I think that this song is about how Brian doesn't understand wimmin and what they're all about. Perhaps you should spend less time hanging around the Autobahn Brian?

TheCraicDealer Thu 07-Mar-13 11:05:08

"This album is something I have wanted to do for a long time. Ireland has produced some of the greatest songs in history and I decided I would put my own twist on a collection of my favourite ever Irish songs."

Hate to break it to you Bri, but Nothing Compares 2 U was written by Prince. Who is American. Soz.

TheCraicDealer Thu 07-Mar-13 11:07:14

Also- how the fuck did he convince Sinead O'Connor to feature on his newest album?! Ronan Keating I get, but would've thought Sinead was a bit pickier.

UnknownGnome Thu 07-Mar-13 11:08:41

I get the impression he doesn't much like women. Unless they're, you know, licking his man


MarmaladeTwatkins Thu 07-Mar-13 11:10:55

He didn't even like the woman that was licking his man all that much!

twitchycurtains Thu 07-Mar-13 11:17:34

I know its been said before but the man is a complete knobber. I don't really like Kerry but its obvious to everyone her problems escalated when he took off and left her with 2 kids to raise. She has openly said he was the love of her life, he on the other hand gets his mother to see his kids during custody visits, shacked up with Delta Goodrem within 2 secs of their duet being released and chooses to live on the other side of the world. He never gave a fuck about either of his two kids even at the height of all the drug allegations. He is a complete and utter cock!.

Also, he was one of fugly ones from westlife, so glad they carried on being successful after he left to become a solo star (arf) dick!

KenDoddsDadsDog Thu 07-Mar-13 11:18:22

He's a turd with highlights.

scarletforya Thu 07-Mar-13 11:21:47

Sweet Holy baby Jebus, I knew he was a too, shockl but the lyrics! the terrible, awful CRINGEMAKING lyrics WAAAAHAAAAHAAAAAhaaaaa grin

Brian or Bryan I AM SCARLET FOR YE, ye thick!

scarletforya Thu 07-Mar-13 11:24:13

Knew he was a tool*

Isittimeforgin Thu 07-Mar-13 11:47:03

I now really, really want to hear Auf Weidersein Bitch cos I think it might just be my new favourite song grin grin
There really is no hope for the dickhead is there? I would so love to be a fly on the wall at his management meetings when he says "I've been working on a new song'!!! grin

RedPencils Thu 07-Mar-13 12:13:21

I had to google those lyrics just to make sure you werent making them up. What an untalented buffoon he is.

MarmaladeTwatkins Thu 07-Mar-13 12:18:17

Auf Weidersein Bitch cannot be listened to anywhere. Not on the Youtubes or Spotify. Hmmmm.

The best looking one from The 'Loife was Mark, the gay one. He was lovely. The rest were shit arses.

MarmaladeTwatkins Thu 07-Mar-13 12:22:25

I've just checked on the iTunes store to see if I could get a preview of it and it's not even on there. Is this a conspiracy? Are Brian's record company trying to erase Auf Weidersein Bitch from musical history? Why?!

Isittimeforgin Thu 07-Mar-13 12:25:53

I am inconsolable marmalade......but not enough to actually buy the album obviously!

AnyaKnowIt Thu 07-Mar-13 12:25:57

It was co-written by Guy Chambers shock

CockyPants Thu 07-Mar-13 12:26:24

Bri you have the face of a spud
And your songs are shitty crud

Isittimeforgin Thu 07-Mar-13 12:30:22

You have a dick like almond paste
And of space you are a waste

TheCraicDealer Thu 07-Mar-13 12:37:36

Do not panic Marmalade - some kind soul has written a song-by-song review of the entire album for people who as yet do not own a copy. I say "yet" because this is clearly a classic in the making, according to this review presumably written by someone with no ears.

LadyBeagleEyes Thu 07-Mar-13 12:41:55

...'one of the most talented men ever to emerge from a boy band'.
Did I really just read that?

caramelwaffle Thu 07-Mar-13 12:57:32

Your lyrics are a load of crock
You are a talentless cock

Bry, you're not cool, or chic, or rad'
You're just a deadbeat dad

caramelwaffle Thu 07-Mar-13 12:58:31


YANBU. He is an odious toad of a deadbeat dad.

AllYoursBabooshka Thu 07-Mar-13 13:12:40


I found it. grin


This video contains images some viewer may find disturbing.

AudrinaAdare Thu 07-Mar-13 13:19:02

Ha hahahaha!

I love the way the person who made the montage just couldn't be arsed to finish it and leaves the entire last minute of the song image-less grin

Isittimeforgin Thu 07-Mar-13 13:21:13

It's even better, in a really really bad way, than I hoped grin

grin it's as awful as he is

UnknownGnome Thu 07-Mar-13 13:27:29

Allyours, thank you! I'm so happy you tracked that song down. He actually sang those awful lyrics. Oh my. I wonder if he's popular in Germany? ? hmm

AllYoursBabooshka Thu 07-Mar-13 13:51:40

Oh lordie don't thank me.

In fact I deeply apologise for subjecting you to that. grin

Are horny and movie supposed to rhyme then? grin

japonicabumsplatt Thu 07-Mar-13 13:53:58

just shell shocked here. the sound of that song has actually fried my one last brain cell. i got past the first 20 seconds or so and then just lost the will to live or care about it.
my intestines are crying and ringing a solicitor as we speak
fucking terrible

MarmaladeTwatkins Thu 07-Mar-13 13:54:19

Actually crying now at hearing it in the flesh grin Thank you Babooshka, you have made my day grin

He seems to have taken a country-lite direction with this one. I love the montage,too. Poor Delta, having to have her face associated with this song sad

MarmaladeTwatkins Thu 07-Mar-13 13:55:55

grin at Japonica grin

DrGarnettsWinterMixture Thu 07-Mar-13 14:15:02

Thanks to whoever it was who mentioned the 'sweet orange love' that the Andre has for his kids, that has made me ROAR grin

Brian is the reverse of PA. He doesn't dedicate every breath he takes to them sad And Mysterious Girl is a work of lyrical genius compared to any badly scanning McFadden output

japonicabumsplatt Thu 07-Mar-13 14:18:24

SOmeone somewhere is making money out of this deluded gurrier's vision of his future as a cultural icon. that can be the only reason this cunt is still allowed to produce such turds and then inflict them on an unwitting society.

EarlyInTheMorning Thu 07-Mar-13 14:25:51

I though you were all joking with the aufidersen bitch
but it's true
potato face potato face

Lottapianos Thu 07-Mar-13 14:28:19

Oh dear lord, my ears, MY EARS!!!! That's even worse than that Peter-Andre-Loves-His-Kids 'Insania' racket. I lasted 1min 25secs <proud>. Absolutely and utterly horrendous. How could something so awful end up being recorded? shock

What on earth was Delta Goodrem thinking? I know we all have our mental moments but Christ alive! She's well rid. As is Kerry.

So sorry for his girls sad and anyone who listens to any of his songs ever

katrinefonsmark Thu 07-Mar-13 14:34:03

The kids accent comments were made a few years ago and are being recycled. We don't know if he actually said them. The only fact we know is that he chose to live very far from his children.

rainbow2000 Thu 07-Mar-13 15:17:38

My god this has to be the funniest thread ever.I have never laughed so much in my life and for even more torture he "sings" Adele Someone Like You badly.
Id go sofar as to say im ashamed he is Irish

Please no more shite lyrics/music. This thread is seriously disturbing. shock grin

FannyFifer Thu 07-Mar-13 18:51:29

OMFG, it's a real song, I am crying laughing listening to it, the just giving up with the montage makes it even funnier.

Ginebra Thu 07-Mar-13 19:01:00

Just read in the paper that his new album has sold only 42 copies! how embarrassing for him!

LadyBeagleEyes Thu 07-Mar-13 19:23:00

I can't believe even 42 bought it.
I bet he has a big extended family.

FannyFifer Thu 07-Mar-13 19:26:43

Big family, being Irish an all. wink

Portofino Thu 07-Mar-13 20:15:38

I really hope Kerry reads this. grin

Thinking about it, he really is the anti-pete...
Even without PALFHK:
Hes blonde, petes dark
He is pasty, pete is orange
He is podgy, pete is umm not

And KP and KK were in the jungle together werent they?
Something fishy is going on here...?

RedPencils Thu 07-Mar-13 20:28:45

Dare soneone to tweet thread to KK. Dare dare dare.

KenDoddsDadsDog Thu 07-Mar-13 20:55:13

I have twitter trigger finger ....

HappyHippyChick Thu 07-Mar-13 21:20:16

Oh god I'm humming that song now blush. I'm going to have to dereg aren't I?!

CockyPants Thu 07-Mar-13 21:22:55

Germans love The Hoff.
Clearly not a nation renowned for its taste....

BringMeTea Thu 07-Mar-13 22:27:55

This thread is very very funny. Do you think Brian has an iota of self-awareness? I have a dvd of Rob Brydon being Keith thingy where he interviews famous couples, Richard n Judy, Sian n Lembik (yes) and Kerry and Bri are on there and he was foul even then. He basically calls her a slag when they got together when she was in Atomic Kitten. Poor deluded Kerry just sits there looking shocked and offended but takes it. Awful.

AnnandBarryAgain Fri 08-Mar-13 00:05:42

I have never heard it myself. Tyke, Scamp, chap... and one i hate 'scut' but never heard maggot used as anything other than bait.

Haha are you posh Ginebra grin grin always maggots round here, (D15) never tykes. Often scuts!

AnnandBarryAgain Fri 08-Mar-13 00:14:01

Ireland take a bow. The lyrics. Jesus Mary and Joseph and all the saints in heaven.

The next Ireland Eurovision entry. They have a pan-European appeal.

He was always the ugly fucker in Westlife. Brian McFatFat until he got Dr Gillian'd. He is an utter utter utter bollox.

I recall Ryan Tubridy calling him out for being a useless father on the Late Late. not that I admit to watching the late late oh no

Thumbwitch Fri 08-Mar-13 04:36:54

I offer you this. From Australia's Got Talent, last year - my favourite ever moment! At ~4:35 is the class moment - but the rest of it has merit in sheer hypocrisy and up-his-own-arseness as well. grin

I hope you can see it - it's youtube, but not sure if it will be area-restricted.

Thumbwitch Fri 08-Mar-13 04:39:51

Beyond - your acronym is fully libellous!! shock - PAFLHK, you mean.grin

shock oopsie, sorry pete!

TheAccidentalExhibitionist Wed 13-Mar-13 21:03:11

Thumbwitch that guy was really good, what fucking arseholes they were to him.
Obviously Bri looked like a twat as usual grin

rainbow2000 Wed 13-Mar-13 21:13:32

Whoever put Bryan McFadden singing that fucking porno song up,thank you i cant get it out of my head.Thats not a good thinggrin

CredulousThicko Thu 28-Mar-13 11:53:47

Heads up, all you lovers of Bry/Bri

he's just been on This Morning being a luvverly cheeky oirish chappie and he's coming back in a bit to murder sing Nothing Compares 2U

Can't wait!

WorriedMummy73 Thu 28-Mar-13 11:58:55

I meant to add to this weeks ago, but it disappeared before I could.

Did anyone else read the recent interview with him in the Sun's Sunday 'women's mag (which is an utterly nasty, bitchy piece of trash and I apologise profusely for reading it). He was talking about how someone had hired his current wife to DJ somewhere but he wanted her with him instead so he offered to pay her the same amount to be with him instead (or some such nonsense). He then went on to say something along the lines of 'paying for my own wife, it's like she's a prostitute, hahahahaha'.

I was all 'eeeeewwwwww' - and that was BEFORE I read this thread and realised that this remark was just another example of his complete twattery!

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