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To think giving a valentines card to your daughter is a bit weird?

(104 Posts)
FatPenguin Sat 16-Feb-13 21:02:14

MIL got valentines cards for OH to give to his daughters (15 and 12 years old). He refused and said he thought it was a bit odd giving valentines card to your kids. MIL is now in a huff with him.
Do people do this?

yousankmybattleship Sat 16-Feb-13 21:04:19

My Dh gives our daighter a card. I think it's really sweet. It depends how you see Valentines, we just use it as an excuse to show a bit of love and be a bit soppy. My son gives his sisters valentines too.

Monty27 Sat 16-Feb-13 21:06:24

Naffola

WTF? confused

MolotovCocktail Sat 16-Feb-13 21:06:33

It's just a lighthearted thing, IMHO. It depends on context, I s'pose.

EuroShagmore Sat 16-Feb-13 21:08:02

My parents used to do one for me. <saddo> I knew it was them but played along. smile

Euphemia France Sat 16-Feb-13 21:08:06

My dad used to, and DH sends one to DD. It's sweet. smile

Annunziata Italy Sat 16-Feb-13 21:08:33

I give my DC Valentines, it's just a lighthearted wee card.

hippo123 Sat 16-Feb-13 21:08:39

Personally I've never Quite understood why an adult would get a child a valentines day card or a child make an adult one. To me it's a thing between two adults in love. I know many would disagree though. Yanbu

CockyFox Sat 16-Feb-13 21:08:51

It is weird but people do it. My uncle sends my cousin flowers every valentines day has done as long as I can remember she is a married mum now but he still does it. Even weirder is it is always the sane flowes he sends to my Aunt (his wife) and his sister.

I don't think it's weird and would hope that if DP and I have a girl that he would give one to her.

I think it's lovely and you can get many valentines cards that aren't 'romantic'.

AuntieMaggie Sat 16-Feb-13 21:09:05

I always got a card from my dad. Nothing weird about it. In other countries its a day for all types of love (friendships etc) not just romantic love.

mynewpassion Sat 16-Feb-13 21:09:45

Isn't Valentine's about love? I think it's sweet.

CockyFox Sat 16-Feb-13 21:10:08

Same flowers not sane flowes.

mum11970 Sat 16-Feb-13 21:11:02

My dh has always bought the dds valentine cards. Eldest is 23, lives with her partner and son and still got one off dad this year. It's just a bit of fun.

wonderingsoul Sat 16-Feb-13 21:11:35

dc got one each from their great nan from the USA.. they werent lovey dovey ones atall. . one was spider man and the other toy story.. just saying funny poem and happy valentines we wish you where there.

I wouldn't do it but don't see the harm.

We write a Valentine's card for each of our DCs every year, with a little letter inside telling them how much we love them and how proud we are of them. We tell them these things on the other 364 days too, but it's a nice thing for them to keep.

I used to get one from my dad. It was kind of half embarrassing, and half nice... the embarrassment was more because I didn't get one from anybody else!

If that's your family tradition then fine... would be a bit odd to start now if he'd never done this before, though. IMO.

NobbyClark Sat 16-Feb-13 21:12:18

Our dd puts loads into the day (she is 10) and sends boys in her class cards and gets really excited about the chance of her getting one back.

Last year she didn't get be in the morning and was soooo gutted so my dad sent her a mystery one. This year DH sent her a mystery one. Then dd2(4) got upset so I had to send her one too......... grin

AuntieMaggie Sat 16-Feb-13 21:12:47

And I made all my workmates cakes for valentines to show that I care...

and tbh when I was a teen getting a card from.my dad was better than getting none esp as he didn't sign them so I could pretend they were from someone else to my mates!

ShowOfHands Sat 16-Feb-13 21:13:04

DD made a card for me at school. I put a card in her bookbag. It's just a sign of affection.

It's only weird if you hang weird ideas from it.

FatPenguin Sat 16-Feb-13 21:13:15

But isn't it meant to be about romance? If it was just about people you love then surely you'd send cards to all people you love e.g like Christmas..

wonderingsoul Sat 16-Feb-13 21:13:58

why do girls only get them to the poster who mentioned if they had a girl they would do it.

I once made one for my brother on moonpig. It was sent through he post and it took him ages to work out it was from me!!

Dd2 came home from school with heart pictures for me and DH.

Monty27 Sat 16-Feb-13 21:14:56

Giving dcs cards is not in the original spirit of the St V celebration in the UK. Aside from the fact it's more commercial crap.

aldiwhore Sat 16-Feb-13 21:18:00

My Dad did this for me one year, his intentions were good, but I felt rotten... not only did no boy my own age fancy me (because when you're 12, fancy is a far as you think) but my parents obviously knew, felt sorry for me and thought that it would cheer me up. It didn't.

I guess it depends how you view Valentine's Day... I always viewed it from a romance perspective, therefore, we wouldn't think of sending our kids Valentine's Day cards. Some people see it as a day about 'love' in all it's forms, so for them it's not weird.

YABU... even though you may view it as romantic love, other might not.

We don't really celebrate it asfor us a) it's just commercial tat b) it feels a bit enforced romance, which for me is not romantic and c) no one really knows who the fuck St Valentine was, and even those who do couldn't possibly reason that Cupid was in anyway involved, different religion. (But if you like it, do it and be happy).

FatPenguin Sat 16-Feb-13 21:18:58

Can you get v'day cards with son or daughter on them then? The ones MIL had got were 'to the one I love' type ones..

TheYamiOfYawn Sat 16-Feb-13 21:19:07

In our household, DP and I don't exchange cards, but we made cards for the children and DD made cards for us all.

aldiwhore Sat 16-Feb-13 21:19:19

Should also say that thinking it's 'weird' almost inplies the father has some inappropriate feelings for his dd... so maybe a better word is available that doesn't turn this into a paedo emergency. YABU for that too. smile

EstherRancid Sat 16-Feb-13 21:19:57

i think originally St Valentine was about romance, but there's fuck all romantic about hiking up the prices of flowers and posh chocs for the day is there? grin

we gave DD a card, it reads 'happy valentines day' on the front and 'to you' on the insided

i used to give the DSs a card when they were younger too.

i used to send my nan a card and small gift too, she loved it, said it was lovely to get a little note from someone saying they loved you

TidyDancer England Sat 16-Feb-13 21:19:57

Yes people do this, and no, it's not weird.

Annunziata Italy Sat 16-Feb-13 21:20:48

I send my sons them smile

My SIL told me I was mental and no wonder they are mummy's boys hmm

crashdoll Sat 16-Feb-13 21:21:54

My dad always gave them to me and my sister. Hated it. It was the furthest thing from sweet and loving but he is an arse, so I'm biased.

MyDarlingClementine England Sat 16-Feb-13 21:41:26

I think its adorable.

How is it odd to send a card to them on a day about love - to say I Love You?

DorisIsWaiting Sat 16-Feb-13 21:54:10

DD1 got VERY upset last year as lots of the children in her class got one from parents and she didn't untill I hurridly made one.

This year all 3 dd's got a card.

(If 59p keeps them happy and reminds them that they are loved then I haven't got a problem with that!)

honeytea Sat 16-Feb-13 21:55:47

My mum always gave us a heart shaped lolly or some heart chocolates.

I think it is odd that it is your mil giving your dp a card for him to give to your dd, if your dp wanted to give your dds a card that is lovely but it's non of mil's business.

Why don't you suggest mil sends the cards to your dds?

mrsbunnylove Sat 16-Feb-13 21:59:23

loathesome. i recall my mum making me make a valentine's card for my dad and him sending me to the post office to 'get one for your mum' which later ended up in an envelope with my name on and i was supposed to be pleased.

their game. i was just the stooge. i'd be six at the most.

bedmonster Sat 16-Feb-13 22:06:05

DP always gets one for the DDs. Unfortunately this year he didn't quite read all the card and the inside makes a reference to a big banana blush grin

They know it's from him, and think it's funny. They are 7 and 8.
DP and I aren't the soppy gushy type, for us it's just a day of having a nice dinner and the DDs have a special meal too. We don't see it as a romantic day at all.

Flisspaps Sat 16-Feb-13 22:09:22

My mum used to make them for us when we were kids, and secretly post them through the letterbox - valentines day was almost always in half term when I was little.

TheBuskersDog Netherlands Sat 16-Feb-13 22:10:14

My Dh gives our daighter a card. I think it's really sweet. It depends how you see Valentines, we just use it as an excuse to show a bit of love and be a bit soppy. My son gives his sisters valentines too.

Why doesn't your husband send one to your son then?

thegreylady Sat 16-Feb-13 22:11:35

My dad always sent me one signed 'Guess Who?' in his handwriting!!he sent mum one with an identical message but hers had kisses!

no, we dont do valentines cards for the kids and I never got one from my parents when I was a child either. I think its a bit strange too

workhouse Sat 16-Feb-13 22:14:58

We do...DH nd I exchange cringy lovey dovey ones and the kids get a fun one each. Its all very harmless and fun.

CabbageLeaves Sat 16-Feb-13 22:15:31

I posted one to my DD at uni. My younger child found 3 heart shaped chocs in her lunch box and was completely thrilled.

GregBishopsBottomBitch Sat 16-Feb-13 22:16:14

I bought my mum flowers, at nearly 30, shes still my mummy.

bedmonster Sat 16-Feb-13 22:18:12

Ah Greg, that's sweet!

KenDoddsDadsDog Chile Sat 16-Feb-13 22:18:57

My dad always got us sweets, DH got DD a flower. Think you are trying to make something inappropriate when it isn't. Nursery gave all the kids love hearts - is that weird too ? hmm

FatPenguin Sat 16-Feb-13 22:19:49

Thebuskersdog- we don't have any children together, they are OH's daughters.
MIL buys a valentines card for her daughter/granddaughters but not sons/grandsons. But girls have always been favoured in family.
To those of you who buy them for your DC's, do you also buy them for your parents or any other family members?

our school didnt do anything for valentines day and I only got something for dh and not for the 2 kids or mum, etc - didnt occur to me to get them anything

Jaynerae Sun 17-Feb-13 00:22:53

DD's friend came into playground on Thursday morning with a valentines card, She showed DD and said I think it is from either boy A, Boy B or Boy C, what do you think? DD said not boy A as it doesn't like you, sorry, but true. DD's friend replies ' he does he just hides it well.'

I was desperately trying to hide laughter, they are 9 btw. I know her parents sent her the card they do it every year and she then goes round asking all boys is it from you?

I really couldn't do that to my DD and let her think it was from a boy.

HolidayArmadillo Netherlands Sun 17-Feb-13 00:32:05

My dad always bought me and my sis flowers on valentines. Very sweet I think.

Greensleeves Sun 17-Feb-13 00:36:49

My dad gives me flowers on Mothers Day, is that weird? I like it, it's his <gruff, repressed> way of saying he thinks I'm a good mum to his grandsons

I think a dad giving his dd a valentines cards is sweet, if that's the dynamic in the family. My dad would rather have chewed his own foot off than do that however grin

Booyhoo Sun 17-Feb-13 00:43:36

my son made a valentines card at school for both me and EXP then when he got home he added his brother onto it aswell. he just sees it as a day to express love to the people you love. for him that means his family. ds2 and i then made a card from both of us to ds1 in return for his card. we enjoyed doing it and getting a big hug when we handed over the cards. it was lovely actually. i dont think we are weird.

LahleeMooloo Sun 17-Feb-13 01:19:15

I was presented one from my son that he'd make at after school club. I've been single for many years and to be honest, it just upset me rather than made me happy. Of course I pretended to DS but I just wanted to forget the whole day. I think it was a bit irresponsible of the after school club to make them. Just stick with the mother's day and xmas cards. I think it's weird and pointless to send them to/from your children/parents when the whole day is centred around romantic love.

StickEmUp Sun 17-Feb-13 01:26:44

I signed off my dh card with my cats names too! crazy cat lady

Jinsei Sun 17-Feb-13 01:34:03

I would find it a bit odd tbh. Fair enough if you all give cards to each other just to express general love and affection, I suppose, but I really don't get all these men giving stuff to their daughters. Why are the cards and gifts only from the dads and not from both parents? And why don't sons get them too? confused

Bogeyface Netherlands Sun 17-Feb-13 01:36:51

Sis and I were given a little box of chocolates on Valentines every year from my dad (well, he signed it with the traditional question mark!). We found out, fairly recently, that he did it so that mum wouldnt have to "share" her box and end up with none!

But apart from that, definitely weird!

tinyshinyanddon Sun 17-Feb-13 01:37:39

I used to think Valentines Day was only about romantic love but now we have kids and are in the USA, here it is about love, friendship and affection. DD takes 20 Valentines to school and all her class exchange cards. They make a special box to store their Valentines in - they are not full-size cards, just small ones, some with gifts attached (pencils, stickers, candy). DD makes DH and I several cards and we give one to her and smaller DS. Quite different to what I was brought up with but I am rather used to it now and find it a very kindly gesture.

Kaida Sun 17-Feb-13 06:35:56

I don't like it, it's Americanised rubbish. Valentine's Day is about romantic love here. Also the whole 'dads sending to their daughters' thing has echoes of romance that make me uncomfortable - it's like those father-daughter dances organised by the purity movement in America. Creepy.

Here in the U.S. it is much more encompassing. Primary aged kids often get/make them for all their classmates and parents and grandparents often give them to kids. I bought Special K strawberry cereal with chocolate bits for the kids as a treat.

FaffTastic Sun 17-Feb-13 06:50:50

The Weird Orange Man, Alex Reid, referred to his young baby daughter as his 'girlfriend' on Twitter on VD - that's v odd IMO.

To answer your post though, I got a card from my parents when I was a young girl but it kind of faded out. Wouldn't have wanted one, and it would've felt a bit strange getting one from them/DF, when i was a teenager.

seeker Sun 17-Feb-13 06:51:53

My dp has always sent both dd and ds cards- but in his writing so they e always known they were from him even though he denies it, if you see what I mean. And I scatter heart shaped chocolates or something similar in their rooms for them to find. Oh, and we have a particular heart shaped pudding for dinner. But we also celebrate the first day of spring, st Patrick's day, st George's day- the opening of an envelope-any excuse chez seeker!

NellysKnickers Spain Sun 17-Feb-13 07:16:29

DH and I don't swop cards. We certainly don't send them to ds's. We all say "I love you" to each other on a regular basis, we don't need to send a card on a set dat. Bit weird IMO.

domesticslattern Sun 17-Feb-13 07:43:07

My father used to send me a valentine every year right up until he died. I treasure them as he was incredibly stiff upper lip and non-vocal about anything to do with love or affection, yet once a year he told me he loved me. Now I have DC we all send each other cards - usually home made- 8 cards were swapped in our house on Valentine's morning!! Where is the harm in telling people you love them?
The weird thing about the OP's scenario is not a father sending a card to his children but the MIL purchasing it without consultation, as though he cannot enter a newsagent himself. That's weird.

LtEveDallas Sun 17-Feb-13 07:43:19

DD always sends one to me and one to DH - and this year the two of them made me a heart shaped cake to come home to.

We get one for DD from the two of us and she also gets one from MuttDog "to my mum". The dog also gets her a bar of chocolate. (Clever dog)

This year I sent her an anonymous one in the post, thinking she'd be excited by it. I wrote it with my left hand. DD took one look at it, said "I bet its from George, I recognise his handwriting" and ripped it in half shock. She was really pissed off - I read that one wrong didn't I? grin

KenDoddsDadsDog Chile Sun 17-Feb-13 07:43:57

Some right old po faces on this thread. You must always be peeping through your net curtains for paedophiles. Pre school , inappropriate for teaching children about a cultural day? Disgrace.

OK: just to clarify:
When I say we send them to all our DCs, that means our daughter and our sons.
The cards just have a design of hearts on the front, so work just as well for familial love instead of romantic love.
We sign them from us, we don't pretend they are from mystery admirers.
When I was a child, I sent one to my parents and they sent one to me (one of the things I look back on with happiness in a generally Stately Home childhood).

lesserspottedshitehawk Sun 17-Feb-13 08:14:42

How to blow a sweet gesture out of proportion. Yes we get the DCs valwntines cards. I must have missed the memo about it being about romance not love.

Mind you, your MIL does need to keep her hooter out. If its not a gesture that comes instinctively from your DH it is NOT her place to buy them for him. Controlling.

BinksToEnlightenment Sun 17-Feb-13 08:43:57

I think it's a sweet thing to do.

This year, nursery made me a little Valentine's card fom my son and I took him out for a lunch and got him some sweets on the way home.

My best friend and I usually send each other a Valentine's message and go for a drink together too.

Valentine's romance and hearts and flowers and chocolates is all just a bit of silly fun. But it's a nice way of letting someone know they're special to you.

TheCatAndTheFiddle Sun 17-Feb-13 08:49:40

To me, personally, it's about a celebration of romantic love between couples (or potential couples) rather than just general 'love'. So I wouldn't send cards to parents/children. It's not that I think it implies a paedo emergency if people do it, it's just not something I would do, or think was really the appropriate thing to do on that particular holiday.

FredFredGeorge Sun 17-Feb-13 08:56:44

MIL sends my DD a valentines card - it says Granddaughter on it... I think it's very weird, and I would certainly not send ones to my DD, but traditions about holidays differ a lot across areas and communities and groups and you just get on with it.

Yes for me valentines day is about romantic love - and even then only for kids/teenagers to learn about it, but it's harmless if others think it's different.

Donnadoon Sun 17-Feb-13 09:17:58

I have 2 sons and 2 daughters I send them all valentine cards as a joke really...they know fine well its me who has sent them but the little ones giggle and say thankyou and the older ones just roll their eyes at me and shake their heads in despair at that their silly mother.DH and I don't bother with cards, he did get me some lovely flowers this year though.

EllieCook Sun 17-Feb-13 09:41:49

My dad used to give us Valentine's cards and a marshmallow heart every year. It was cute, nothing weird and certainly not romantic. I used to give valentines to my classmates - I think it is what you make it, but it's not important enough to get into a huff about it.

FatPenguin Sun 17-Feb-13 09:43:37

Yes I think the issue here is MIL buying the cards and then going off in a huff and saying he's a bad dad for not giving them when he said it's not something he wants to do.
On another note, I feel like my parents owe me my lifetimes worth of valentines cards envy...

MissAnnersley Sun 17-Feb-13 09:52:17

I give DS a Valentine's card. It usually has something funny on it. I pretend it's not from me although he knows it is. I usually buy him a heart shaped cake or sweetie. It costs around £2.

We both enjoy it.

My exMIL sends him a card every year. To me it's an acknowledgement from her that she loves him and is thinking of him. It's a much appreciated gesture in a tricky family dynamic.

It has nothing to do with romantic love.

superstarheartbreaker Sun 17-Feb-13 09:59:31

ABU. It is sweet. My dad and grandad used to always give me cards; very few others ever have!

superstarheartbreaker Sun 17-Feb-13 10:03:34

Why does the whole valentines thing have to be just about romantic love? Surely other types of love should be celebrated too. Blood is thicker than water and all that! Most people think that Valentines sucks anyway; couples feel the pressure to give 'goodenough' gifts and be all sexy and singles feel shit for being single. I was chuffed with my 3 Valentines texts. I normally get nada..even when I was in a relationship recently I was gutted.

Beaverfeaver Sun 17-Feb-13 10:06:07

I think it's weird but know many who do it.

superstarheartbreaker Sun 17-Feb-13 10:07:13

Some of us single mums got together on Valentines day this year and had a little party . We made cards and heart shaped scones for the kids. We also made a chocolate fondue and dipped strawberries in it; not wierd.

DomesticCEO Sun 17-Feb-13 10:10:54

I don't see anything wrong with giving cards to DC but do think, as other posters have said, that its a little odd that only girls are getting them and not sons. Why leave the boys out?

Or is it all about the daddy's little princess crap?

shushpenfold Sun 17-Feb-13 10:13:10

It's lovely....I used to send one to my dad, being that I loved him for being my lovely dad.

shushpenfold Sun 17-Feb-13 10:16:20

Lovely, lovely grin Obviously having a moment this morning (a lovely one!)

SarahBumBarer Sun 17-Feb-13 10:23:09

I think it's depressing (and weird) that people are so quick to label practices weird just because it's not what they do.

Jinsei Sun 17-Feb-13 10:47:50

I think it's depressing (and weird) that people are so quick to label practices weird just because it's not what they do.

But it's not quite that simple, is it? Personally, I would never send a valentine's card to my dc, my friends or my parents etc., because for me, that's not what this festival is about. However, I see nothing weird about other people doing it if that's what they want to do.

What I do find a bit odd is the number of parents who only seem to send cards to their children of the opposite gender - mainly dads to daughters but also mums to sons. If it is a celebration of non-romantic family love, why does gender even come into it? Why don't the cards go from mum and dad, to both sons and daughters? (And before anybody jumps on me, i know they do in some families and that's not what I'm talking about). This is the aspect I find a bit difficult to understand, and nobody has really explained it.

DomesticCEO Sun 17-Feb-13 11:02:18

Jinsei, that was the point I was trying to make but you put it so much better than me!

If its about non romantic love then why the dads to daughters thing?

That's what I think is weird!

Jinsei Sun 17-Feb-13 11:10:32

domestic, I tried to make the same point yesterday but it didn't come out very clearly! grin

I would genuinely like to hear from someone who does the dads to daughters/mums to sons thing as to why they do it like that!

CheeseStrawWars Sun 17-Feb-13 11:16:00

St Valentine is the patron saint of engaged couples and happy marriages... it's a romantic love thing. St Sarah is the patron saint of daughters - she has a day on 19th August - perhaps your DH could tell your MIL he'll hang onto the cards til then? wink

Why did your MIL get your DH cards anyway - if he wanted to do that, then surely he'd have got his own?

WhatsTheBuzz Sun 17-Feb-13 11:16:07

get
a grip! Unless your MIL is actually a creep in general, it's weird that
in your head this is an issue. I was given a flyer for a Valentine's
themed kids' craft morning, is that inappropriate too!?

BrianCoxandTheTempleofDOOM Sun 17-Feb-13 11:22:00

I send DD a card and usually get her a little present.

I started that tradition after my friend telling me that her dad always bought her a card and she really loved it (always left it unsigned, she always pretended to not know who it was from - silly family tradition, but meant a lot to them).

I liked the idea of doing that for my DD (9 yo). I have never sent a V card to anybody (other than home made card to my parents when I was little) and have never celebrated V day, so the 'romantic' love thing holds no ties to the day, for me.

Owing to the onus I have put on getting DD a card, V day is all about 'Love' whatever that means to you as a person/family, but not 'romance' to me.

DS is due in <deep breaths> 5 weeks omg am hyperventilating and I did think how lovely it would be next year to get him involved too! (although it will mean absolutely nowt to him, being 11 months old! grin )

BrianCoxandTheTempleofDOOM Sun 17-Feb-13 11:25:18

If its about non romantic love then why the dads to daughters thing?

but why not? Unless you (you in general) are insinuating the dad is doing it for perverted reasons.

Sometimes in life, there is no ulterior motive/deep thought - maybe, just maybe, it's an innocent little gesture aimed at bringing a smile to a face?

<throws rainbows and sparkly shit around MN>

wink

WhatsTheBuzz Sun 17-Feb-13 11:27:12

as
for banging on about the origins of Valentine's day, do you do that at
christmas/easter/halloween too? fgs, what are you actually trying to
insinuate?

BrianCoxandTheTempleofDOOM Sun 17-Feb-13 11:35:27

WhatsTheBuzz nail on the head.

It would be interesting to know how many people who celebrate Christmas, do so to the letter (midnight mass, church on Christmas day) and how many of us save opening presents until Boxing Day, as was the original reason for the 26th December (in the UK at least)

I said it about Baby Showers the other day, other traditions/cultures should be openly embraced. It gets on my tits nerves the way that it is sneered upon, and the good old 'Americanism' line is rolled out time and again.

What's wrong with embracing other cultures? Or should ours (UK) not evolve and just stay the same forever? If so, for what reason? Culture is not fixed, it is life, it is something that breathes and evolves over time.

can you tell I am putting off housework?

MusicalEndorphins Sun 17-Feb-13 11:40:49

Some people like to celebrate everything. My mother used to decorate the house with cardboard Valentines, decorate the table, and give us heart shaped pancakes, red jello and cupcakes with red sprinkles decorations on then. We all got chocolates and cards on Valentines Day.
I do not follow suit I may add.

MusicalEndorphins Sun 17-Feb-13 11:42:55

PS. I think your dh was snotty to his mother.

Jinsei Sun 17-Feb-13 11:46:44

But still nobody has explained yet why gender comes into it? confused

MusicalEndorphins Sun 17-Feb-13 12:15:00

OP, do you mean, the cards were to be from your dh, not from her? In that case I tale it back, your dh was not being snotty.
Perhaps her mil thinks the boys would be embarrassed because it is "girly"? (not my opinion) I don't think that is fair, it should be none or all, and the cards should be appropriate for the persons they are for.

MusicalEndorphins Sun 17-Feb-13 12:15:19

*take, not tale.

DomesticCEO Sun 17-Feb-13 12:52:55

BrianCox, nope no insinuation whatsover that its peverted but why leave sons out? If you have children of both genders why would dads only give cards to their daughters and not their sons?

FatPenguin Sun 17-Feb-13 12:54:07

MusicalEndorphins- Yes she bought the cards for OH to give to his daughters. 'These are for DD1 and DD2 from you - write in them' sort of thing. He didn't tell MIL she couldn't give cards from herself but he just said it isn't something he wants to do.
And yes I also wondered why it was just girls in the family who gets them, as you said it should be for boys and girls or no one at all.

Apparently MIL does this every year and every year he says no so she signs them herself and pretends their from him.

allbie Sun 17-Feb-13 14:07:03

Well I give a card and chocs to all our DCs , boys and girls...shock...horror! They know it's me and they love it!! Our eldest daughter (15) wanted to make sure I was doing it as usual because she liked getting a card from me! It's about soppy old love and I love them all with all my heart. You live but once, why confine yourself to having to be so against everything when you can spread abit of fun, laughter and happiness? Not to mention an acknowledgement of your pure love for those most special to you in the whole wide world!

AuntieMaggie Sun 17-Feb-13 17:19:46

I adopted the idea of it being about more than romantic love and telling your other loved ones how much you care on v day from scandinavian friends who in their 20s still made little cards/notes for 'everyone'. I think its lovely and doesn't have to be expensive or commercial. Who doesn't like to be told they're loved?

Foggles Sun 17-Feb-13 17:26:15

I've got nothing against it but it's not something we have done - or any of our friends / family TBH.

Perhaps it is a more recent practice?

Having said that, people wonder why DH & I get each other easter eggs....

because it's chocolate - that's why! grin

andubelievedthat Sun 17-Feb-13 17:41:16

my fella always sends one 2 a>my sister a complete drama queen (esp. if she does not get one ) and b> my daughter ,not his < who is not a kid>is young adult, because he does not want her to be upset ,privately, if no one else sent one , he writes them with his non writing hand cos he thinks / hopes it disguises his usual handwriting, one of the many reason i luv him is his daft caring re other peoples feelings.

BrianCoxandTheTempleofDOOM Sun 17-Feb-13 18:56:18

Domestic ah yes I understand, I think I went off on a more generalised tangent with my wittering, as up-thread it was insinuated that it was odd in a pervy way.

Foggles Can I just say, the one celebration I am given nothing for is Easter <sobs> although DD gets far too many eggs and I end up having to help her eat them

Foggles Sun 17-Feb-13 19:40:51

BrianCox I practically had chocolate exchange days written into a prenuptial agreement grin

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