To get annoyed at DH for buying me flowers

(152 Posts)
BimbaBirba Wed 13-Feb-13 21:04:03

For Valentine's... Yes one day early!
Annoyed because he dumps them on me and I need to unwrap them, get a vase, dispose of all the wrapping, cut the stems and place them
in water then clear up the mess from leaves and other bits that fall on the floor.
What a faff! I just wish he'd buy me chocolates instead!

Sidge Wed 13-Feb-13 21:06:37

My heart bleeds for you.


ThisIsMummyPig Wed 13-Feb-13 21:07:13

Well if he bought them tomorrow you wouldn't have them when you woke up. My DH leaves them in the car, but they might get a bit cold tonight.

TBF He only buys them for my birthday now, valentines is a non-event in our house.

Ilovesunflowers Wed 13-Feb-13 21:07:28

How bloody ungrateful. Not funny even if you are joking. Poor bloody guy.

lastSplash Wed 13-Feb-13 21:08:18

Say "they're beautiful, thank you. Please can you put them in a vase in the living room?" and let him sort it all out...

I would say YABU purely on the strength of the OP but (1) I hate the flower-pushing at exorbitant rates that goes on around valentines; and (2) suspect it is not a very ethical / environmentally sound business so YANBU.

XBenedict Wed 13-Feb-13 21:08:19

Really? How lovely he bought you flowers!

KnittedCharacter Wed 13-Feb-13 21:08:24

How very ungrateful!!!!!

gordyslovesheep Wed 13-Feb-13 21:08:43

bet your diamond shoes are too tight as well OP

MrsBW Wed 13-Feb-13 21:08:45

What Ilovesunflwers said.

BluelightsAndSirens Wed 13-Feb-13 21:09:04


mynewpassion Wed 13-Feb-13 21:09:18

Show off.

LadyWidmerpool Wed 13-Feb-13 21:10:13

That's why my husband hasn't bought me flowers in ten years - to save me a trip to the kitchen! What a guy grin

usualsuspect Wed 13-Feb-13 21:10:15

YABU, I love getting flowers.

You sound like a right misery guts.

BimbaBirba Wed 13-Feb-13 21:10:18

I'm being an ungrateful bitch aren't I? I just don't see the point of them, just the faff

McNewPants2013 Wed 13-Feb-13 21:10:55

Have awful for you

KnittedCharacter Wed 13-Feb-13 21:11:49

Did u thank him bimba? what have u bought him for valentines?

usualsuspect Wed 13-Feb-13 21:12:08

Must be awful, having a husband who buys you flowers.

Is he usually so controlling?

BimbaBirba Wed 13-Feb-13 21:14:17

He buys me flowers at least 5 times a year, the bastard.
I got him chocolates and a card

I don't really like cut flowers. DH knows this. This week he heard me reminiscing about yellow Bic biros and bought me two boxes. That's love.

I get it, OP. It isn't the gift, it is what it represents. He panicked on the way home, grabbed flowers, and thought "that'll do" without actually thinking what you like. And his responsibility for the gift ends when he dumps it in your lap.

SoWhatIfImWorkingClass Wed 13-Feb-13 21:15:15

Poor guy.

gordy grin

My DH bought me a bottle of Sancerre instead of a bunch of 'shitty overpriced flowers you'd have to fanny around with for 10 mins'. That's why he's lovely. (Reminds me to update my dh is a cock thread from earlier this week).

So YANBU wine wins

YABU - the faff is part of the fun. You can look at them and think how lovely they are as you arrange them

and what usual said ^^

DizzyHoneyBee Wed 13-Feb-13 21:15:39

YABU. People who have lost their husbands due to bereavement would jump at the chance for flowers. Start appreciating what you have and stop being so ungrateful.

BimbaBirba Wed 13-Feb-13 21:16:02

Exactly Horatia. He could take some responsibility for the gift too!

GirlOutNumbered Wed 13-Feb-13 21:17:05

urgh. I hate Valentines Day.
Watching all the men in Tesco today buying cheap tat and cards.

Does anyone really need a day to say I love you.

usualsuspect Wed 13-Feb-13 21:17:20

You just have to put them in a vase, it's hardly bloody rocket science.

LAK11 Wed 13-Feb-13 21:17:36


KnittedCharacter Wed 13-Feb-13 21:17:59

Is he gonna be pissed with u when he has to take all the packaging off the chocs and open the box?

DelGirl Wed 13-Feb-13 21:18:23

leave the bastard hmm

take responsibility for the gift? what the actual fuck, it's only a bunch of flowers

BimbaBirba Wed 13-Feb-13 21:19:11

It's not just a matter of putting them in a vase. It's all the leaves on the floor, and changing the water, and finding a vase that fits and disposing of a lots of wrapping paper, and throwing them away when they're off. Shall
I go on?

Sidge Wed 13-Feb-13 21:19:27

Horatia that's quite an assumption.

Maybe he'd gone into a florists and given them his wife's favourite flowers and colours and had a bouquet made up for her?

I think buying someone you love a gift of any sort is lovely and should be received with gratitude. If you hate cut flowers and your OH knows that then it would imply a degree of thoughtlessness but if he doesn't know that you can't complain.

(I'd far rather have flowers than chocolate!)

dickiedavisthunderthighs Wed 13-Feb-13 21:19:42

My invisible boyfriend bought me Liberty and Tiffany and then invisibly asked me to marry his hypothetical self.
I'd be fuming if I was you.

usualsuspect Wed 13-Feb-13 21:19:53

See, opening chocolates is a faff, and then all that deciding whether to eat the fudge or caramel one first.

BimbaBirba Wed 13-Feb-13 21:21:19

Chocolates give me pleasure, flowers sit idle. You can't really compare the two

aldiwhore Wed 13-Feb-13 21:21:40

I'm not sure YABU or not... DH once bought me the entire spectrum of gifts one can possibly purchase at a garage that aren't car related. That didn't excite me, but I suppose I should be grateful. (I was actually...sad that I am)

usualsuspect Wed 13-Feb-13 21:22:30

I think you are on a wind up grin

BimbaBirba Wed 13-Feb-13 21:23:23

Guess I've never had the guts to tell
him I resent him for buying them in 11 years that we've been married. Suppose I should have said it the first time. I can't really say it now, can I?

KnittedCharacter Wed 13-Feb-13 21:23:38

my thoughts exactly usualsuspect

i really hope so usual

ChewinTheFat Wed 13-Feb-13 21:23:55

YABU and ungrateful!

I spotted a massive bunch of red roses today in town, nearly bought myself them but thought that would be a bit on the sad side.

BimbaBirba Wed 13-Feb-13 21:25:19

Not at all. Why is everyone always so suspicious on MN? I genuinely wish could tell him I don't want them.

Primafacie Wed 13-Feb-13 21:25:55


BimbaBirba Wed 13-Feb-13 21:26:53

What's LTB?

KnittedCharacter Wed 13-Feb-13 21:27:28

because bimba you sound like you are spoilt! i cant believe someone wud act like that. would u have preferred him to have forgot?

BimbaBirba Wed 13-Feb-13 21:30:10

Well he kind of had forgotten actually. Today we went to see him at work with the kids who are on half term and one of them asked him what he was going to get mummy for St Valentines and he looked genuinely taken aback. Next thing he comes home from work with the flowers.

HildaOgden Wed 13-Feb-13 21:30:20

I really hope you're nicer to him than it seems by your posts,if not then maybe he got them to deliberately annoy you?Or maybe he thinks you eat too many chocolates as it is?

BimbaBirba Wed 13-Feb-13 21:32:58

I think he hasn't got a clue that he pisses me off every time he comes home with a bunch of flowers. As I said, I don't really know how I can tell him after all these years. He would think I'm the biggest hypocrite ever.

Springdiva Wed 13-Feb-13 21:33:17

I agree Bimba.
My DH buys flowers and also sends them for my birthday. But what's involved in that - phone florist, give card details, tell them what you want on giftcard - 'with love from spud'. In all it must take about 5 and a half minutes. And I"m supposed to be overwhelmed with thrilled gratitude.
The other time he buys flowers is when he has been a selfish dick and is trying to make up for his crap behaviour - I really feel like telling him to stuff them.

Can I swap your flowers for the sweet FA that my husband has got me?!

WorraLiberty Wed 13-Feb-13 21:34:14

Perhaps he thought you'd look know sitting there all evening behind a large bunch of flowers?

moondog Wed 13-Feb-13 21:35:17

I do think you have a point.
However lovely flowers are (and they are) all that extricating from tight plasic and sellotape is dispiriting.
When I give someone flowers I always take them out of the plastic and rewrap in lovely tissue paper with a ribbon and decant flower food to a little glass jar. I figure like me they will be grateful not to have all that hassle.

usualsuspect Wed 13-Feb-13 21:35:48

I'm even more amazed that anyone actually agrees with you.

BMW6 Wed 13-Feb-13 21:36:55

Or maybe he thinks you eat too many chocolates as it is?

I luv you Hilda grin

usualsuspect Wed 13-Feb-13 21:37:09

What hassle?

It takes a few minutes, bloody nora.

The world has gone mad, mad I tell you.

Sidge Wed 13-Feb-13 21:37:49

Maybe you should take your unwanted flowers to a local nursing home, they'd be gratefully received there.

or send them to me

BMW6 Wed 13-Feb-13 21:38:57

Don't bother with a vase OP - just shove em up your arse.
That'll show him. The bastard.

LetsFaceTheMusicAndDance Wed 13-Feb-13 21:39:19

Alfrex? Greensleeves?

Are you at it again!


BimbaBirba Wed 13-Feb-13 21:40:21

Wouldn't mind if he sorted them
out and looked after them until they're disposed of in the green bin.
As it is, it feels like a cheap gesture

ENormaSnob Wed 13-Feb-13 21:40:23

My dh has bought me chocolates.

I am 7 months pregnant. Does the selfish twat not realise I already have 2 stone to lose post baby sad

Bloody thoughtless grin

Worra grin

BimbaBirba Wed 13-Feb-13 21:41:51

Who's alfrex?

Moistenedbint Wed 13-Feb-13 21:43:05

What a frightful misogynist shock and so controlling ....perpetuating benevolent sexism and undermining the women's revolution. Leave the bastard, call women's aid, etc etc etc.

PoppyWearer Wed 13-Feb-13 21:44:01

OP, I don't like DH buying me flowers. Yes, the mess/hassle but for me I just don't like watching them wither and die. I'd rather have a plant and then forget to water it.

My one exception is daffodils, I love to fill the house with them at Easter.

Just tell him! Have told my DH not to buy me flowers, he wasn't the slightest bit offended.

MIL always brings flowers when she visits and her, no, I don't dare tell.

NapaCab Wed 13-Feb-13 21:44:29

Flowers for Valentine's Day that you have to cut up and put into a vase?

Leave the bastard!

Oh I want flowers now. envy
I LOVE flowers.
<narrows eyes as hairy DH watches sodding football obliviously>

I'll have them.

miemohrs Wed 13-Feb-13 21:46:49

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Ridersofthestorm Wed 13-Feb-13 21:48:07

My god how inconsiderate of him confused

Libramonkey Wed 13-Feb-13 21:50:00

Wish someone would buy me flowers... or chocolates.... or anything. sad

floweryblue Wed 13-Feb-13 21:53:04

What do you get your DH for Valentine's OP?

Adversecamber Wed 13-Feb-13 21:54:04

I remember my mate going off on one because her DH had the temerity to buy her supermarket flowers.

Ragwort Wed 13-Feb-13 21:54:05

I agree with you grin - I really hope my DH doesn't buy me flowers tomorrow, 1) they are sooooooooooo expensive, I would rather have a bog standard bunch every week for the next two months than a huge bouquet - 2) I am going away on Saturday so it would be a real waste.

Surely a true gift is something that you would value and appreciate, I would love it if DH got my car valeted or bought me a dustbin grin - either of those gifts would make a real difference to my life, a bouquet will not.

Equally I suppose I know that the present my DH would like is an hour or so 'unreserved' attention in bed, and no, he's not going to get that grin. I've bought him a £1 box of maltesers grin.

zipzap Wed 13-Feb-13 21:54:49

YANBU - valentine's flowers are a rip off and only show that the person buying them has been suckered by a massive marketing machine...

Same goes for cut flowers most of the time. DH knows better than to give me flowers too - would prefer to have a pot plant or plant for the garden that will last for longer and give pleasure for much longer too. Partly this is because I refused to give cut flowers to my mum and his mum when we got married as is often convention (not least because they were staying away from home) - instead I got them a couple of little rose bushes each (including making sure they had nicely named and appropriate species of roses), wrapped up nicely. Now, 10 ish years down the line, the rose bushes still live on in their gardens and both like them as pretty flowers in the garden and as a more long lasting reminder and genuine thank you to both of them. Cost the same as cut flowers if not a little less, but the value was significantly more.

I once received a beautiful bouquet of flowers when leaving a job that was actually a fairly long term consultancy post (18 months). The people involved had become good friends (and I went on to work with a lot of them a little later in a different company) - they knew me, knew I loved chocolates and wine amongst other things that are impersonal thank you type presents to give when a present isn't needed. They also knew I was going on holiday abroad for a couple of weeks the next day. And yet - they still gave me these beautiful flowers that I got to look at for all of a couple of hours when I got them home, then I gave them to some relatives that I lived closest to and could easily get them to, as otherwise they would have sat in my flat and been dead by the time I got back. It just felt like they had ordered them without thinking for a moment (and admittedly they were all men so maybe they had wives that would have liked them or they had a florist account for such things but no account for wine or chocs. But despite knowing they meant well, it still felt like a kick in the guts because even if they had spent a fraction of the money on a box of chocs or bottle of wine it would have been more personal and useful. And then on top of that you end up feeling guilty because you know they went to some trouble and thought they were doing something nice so that just compounds the bad feelings.

You ungrateful bugger OP. Send them here, I've been debating buying myself and the kids some for tomorrow anyway. Washed and polished a vase ready! grin

Libra thanks

usualsuspect Wed 13-Feb-13 21:57:19

I've got all my vases ready, I know interflora will be knocking all day.

Foggles Wed 13-Feb-13 21:57:33

I usually get given supermarket flowers that have been rolling around in the back of DH's car for the last week. Usually a few of the heads are missing.

I still arrange them in a vase and think what a tight bastard he is

grin only kidding

NotSoNervous Wed 13-Feb-13 21:59:30


<sends usual some roses>

WorraLiberty Wed 13-Feb-13 22:01:00

My sister used to work delivering flowers for her local florist

She said the worst part was when someone wasn't home and she'd have to leave them with a neighbour.

The utter look of disappointment when they realised they weren't actually for them grin

Foggles Wed 13-Feb-13 22:03:09

Worra - I can just imagine.

The florist van pulls up, you see them come up the path, knock on the door and then they ask you to take them in for No. 11.

Bastards grin

BimbaBirba Wed 13-Feb-13 22:04:16

grin Worra

ladymariner Wed 13-Feb-13 22:04:42

I've heard it all now.....this can't be for real. Can it? Really? Surely nobody is so brattish as to make out sticking a bunch of flowers is hard work?

Well, I hope you've had a relaxing evening with your feet up and a restorative tipple at your side, Op, to help you recover from the stress of this terrible occurrence.....

Libramonkey Wed 13-Feb-13 22:08:10

Thanks TheSit smile

puds11isNAUGHTYnotNAICE Wed 13-Feb-13 22:08:24

Give them back to him tomorrow as his valentines?

mumeeee Wed 13-Feb-13 22:08:55

YABU. I love getting flowers and we don't exchange big gifts on valentines. DH usually buys me flowers and we go out for a meal. That's it I don't even buy him anything now as he's not eating chocolate at the moment.

ouryve Wed 13-Feb-13 22:09:01

Say thank you because he thought of you. Sort them out. Remember that he thought of you. Some time in the future, have the conversation where you mention that flowers don't really do a lot for you. I understand that one. It's an expensive gift that sometimes makes my nose run and is gone after a week or so.

Even though we'd agreed not to bother, this year, DH bought me a very sweet little potted plant, today. Small, unobtrusive, my favourite shade of purple, will last and will make me smile whenever I look at it. Just as much as the 10p pot of mini daffs I bought a couple of weeks ago (and which I will plant out in the garden, when the winter is over)

supergreenuk Wed 13-Feb-13 22:10:14

I hate getting flowers too. Over priced too. I agree with all you have said. My husband knows though. I love my chocolates.

Leeds2 Wed 13-Feb-13 22:10:54

What on earth are yellow bic biros?!

usualsuspect Wed 13-Feb-13 22:11:45

Did you arrange the yellow bic biros in a vase?

My neighbour is pregnant with her third. Her husband sent her some beautiful flowers, the van turned up to deliver, but she must've been in the shower. He pulled up after school run just as I was going to offer to have them, so he (looking gutted) signed for them & took,them in. They must've cost at least £40 but something similar from tesco would've been £15, he'd paid the extra for the lovely surprise factor, but ended up just walking in with them himself.

puds11isNAUGHTYnotNAICE Wed 13-Feb-13 22:13:30

Leeds I think they are Bic biros that are yellow confused

I am aghast at the sheer bastarding cheek of him! Flowers! How bloody dare he. If it's not an eternity ring you should tell him to stuff off.

I would be shoving them up his nostril and stamping my foot. A lot.

Bloody flowers <shakes fist>

You just can't get the romance nowadays.

BimbaBirba Wed 13-Feb-13 22:18:19

I know what! I could tell him they make me sneeze (I do suffer from hayfever). Thanks for giving

BimbaBirba Wed 13-Feb-13 22:19:28

Thanks for giving me a brilliant excuse!

miemohrs Wed 13-Feb-13 22:22:30

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ChairmanWow Wed 13-Feb-13 22:25:18

...and thanks for giving us this hilarious thread.

Hopefully he will make you happy next year by getting you absolutely nothing.

determinedma Wed 13-Feb-13 22:26:33

I will get sweet f.a so enjoy your flowers. I expect I will get my tits groped in a gesture of "love"

BimbaBirba Wed 13-Feb-13 22:26:51

Hilarious? Really?
Oh well, better than a flaming, I suppose.

Moistenedbint Wed 13-Feb-13 22:32:11

I remember my mate going off on one because her DH had the temerity to buy her supermarket flowers.

Arf, have heard of women remonstrating with their partners over garage-bought flowers.. Superficial, ungrateful, pompous behaviour.

And I always think, you clearly have very little to worry about

Do birds fly over your flowers Bimba? Does your son have a vegetarian girlfriend? I'm not going to say you are or are not being U until I know you aren't someone playing an elaborate joke. This not being as funny as the burnt cakes unfortunately.

I LOVED the cakes one.

BreconBeBuggered Wed 13-Feb-13 22:54:21

I like the brandy sauce.

frantic53 Wed 13-Feb-13 22:54:54

YABU! In 32 years of marriage I can count the bunches of flowers I got from ex h on the fingers of one hand and three of those were for the birth of our children and bought because my DM bullied him into it! All I got every year was, "We're not doing Valentine's are we? It's such a waste of money." I happen to know that NW (that's new woman, I just made that up) is to be spoilt rotten tomorrow though! sad

These are yellow Bics.

I was trying to get into the OP's head sympathetically. If she doesn't like flowers, flowers are a crap present. A default present that Stereotypical Woman might like, but not her. Like diamond earrings or a hot water bottle with a heart on.

In fairness, if you've spent years failing to tell him you don't like cut flowers, today probably isn't the day to bring it up.

booge Wed 13-Feb-13 23:53:04

YANBU I can't be arsed with flowers either. (Except a bunch of daffs in a rubber band).

JoyceDivision Wed 13-Feb-13 23:59:05

when i had dc1, for the valentines day, dh went to pick up a chinese takeaway, and got an extra paper bag from the staff and put my present in there, got back, handed it to me and said 'here's the prawn crackers' and when i ripped open the bag there was.... a texas chainsaw massacre lunchbox and flask! I absolutely loved it!!!

It wasn't expensive ut it was well thought out by dh and soemthing daft he knew I'd like.

JoyceDivision Thu 14-Feb-13 00:01:54

i don't think I'll get much this year, and if it really puts it in perspective, i got nothing for Christmas from dh as he spent the days befpre Christmas at hospital with MIL as she passed away sad

Now, go and say thank you for your flowers, I'd be happy with them!

consordino Thu 14-Feb-13 00:04:35

I don't like roses - everybody knows I don't like roses. The DC know I don't like roses. DH will buy me roses tomorrow. He buys me roses for my birthday too. Every time the children chorus "but mummy doesn't like roses". I have been saying for several years "I like XXXX, and XXXXX flowers, but I don't really like roses."
At least they die quickly!

thistlelicker Thu 14-Feb-13 00:05:01

Sometimes men can't win! Ur lucky he even bought u them and took the time and proved they just not bought from the garage!!

I told my hubby no valentines this year! We will use money to book a holiday instead! wink

OrangeLily Thu 14-Feb-13 00:06:34

Diddums... Poor you.

Life is so hard!

ilovesooty Thu 14-Feb-13 00:08:52

I do know someone who gave her husband hell because he bought her flowers that didn't complement the living room.

JoyceDivision Thu 14-Feb-13 00:13:38

I really like those roses (i think) that look like little cabbages!

consordino Thu 14-Feb-13 00:14:27

Cabbage roses??

CuriousMama Thu 14-Feb-13 00:14:33

Odd you can't converse with your dh? Dp knows not to buy me them. They remind me of funerals tbh. I like them in my garden though.

Dp bought me clothes much nicer. I bought him some underwear for me and a sexy dress, for me wink

CuriousMama Thu 14-Feb-13 00:15:46

consordina, I think I know where I'd stick the roses wink Is he trying to wind you up?

CuriousMama Thu 14-Feb-13 00:16:22

consordino sorry for spelling mistake.

JoyceDivision Thu 14-Feb-13 00:16:30

these type here , Consordino

JoyceDivision Thu 14-Feb-13 00:17:23

But I wouldn't put flowers in my bottom, that wold be odd! And a waste of flowers! But possibly be more fragrant...

consordino Thu 14-Feb-13 00:19:31

Nope, sorry, I don't like those either. I like tulips and daffodils the best.

Jojobump1986 Thu 14-Feb-13 00:26:06

YANBU, or at least, if you are then so am I! I hate, hate, hate flowers. You have to arrange them & find somewhere to display them with pride & then figure out the right time between keeping them up long enough for DH to feel they've been appropriately appreciated & getting them down before they start to smell. I always get it wrong & leave them up too long because I feel guilty throwing them away & then they smell disgusting. DH knows better than to get me flowers now after I burst into tears, insisted he didn't know me at all & there was no point to our relationship. In my defence, I was trying to get my depression under control at the time & the meds made me a little emotional fragile! Someone else bought me flowers last weekend & DH has been removing the dead ones & topping up the water for me. They're not very smelly as flowers go but I'm pregnant & can smell the 'green' from across the room. They are pretty though!

tinyshinyanddon Thu 14-Feb-13 03:33:44

This thread illustrates why DH has been instructed to bring me one dozen donuts tomorrow (and I have even given him the coupon to get them on sale).

We were sat in Frankie and Bennys earlier and i said "I haven't got a card for you for tomorrow" he said "I haven't got one for you either" so we both went to ASDA, took it turns to go get a card for the other cos it was snowing and baby's nap time. (sat in p&cparking as well, DEVILS!) £4 quid! I'd rather have avbottle of wine, personally!

True example of commercialism. But it wasn't my doing, I'm just happy that he made my baby and I get to wake up with him everyday <boak> :-)

financialwizard Thu 14-Feb-13 06:12:43

I got flowers yesterday with chocolates and a card. First time in six years for my husband. Tbh I am just grateful he managed to order them because he is posted somewhere sandy right now.

Eebahgum Thu 14-Feb-13 06:43:41

I'm thinking this is a joke too although not as good as the cake one. If not, I would like to add another to the long list of YABUs. My dp buys me flowers every month or so & I love it. I suspect I'm getting a big load of naff all today though & that still makes me a bit sad.

BambieO Thu 14-Feb-13 06:47:16

I have no idea if I will get a gift but am looking forward to my card and the dine in deal from m and s currently residing in my fridge smile is it too early for the wine and chocolates? grin

zcos Thu 14-Feb-13 06:54:51

hate Valentine's! prefer st dwynwens much prefer getting flowers as a suprise ... and not red roses!
I can see your point of view op if he just shoved them at you almost thinking right I'm off the hook grin

BimbaBirba Thu 14-Feb-13 06:56:48

I must have started a thread similar to a bogus one by your comments. I'm sorry if people think this was a fan thread. It wasn't. That's the trouble with bogus thread: people don't believe anything anymore.
Might try to upload a picture of the bloody flowers on my profile to prove Im not a fake

KnittedCharacter Thu 14-Feb-13 07:21:47

My dp always buys me flowers which come already in a bag of water presented in a box so all i have to do is find a nice place for them to stand!! He is a good un....!

pigletmania Thu 14-Feb-13 07:32:56

Here have a biscuit very ungrateful

BambieO Thu 14-Feb-13 07:36:07

piglet I'm reckoning you will be flamed for not providing the saucer for crumbs and the brew for dunking and a Hoover for strays grin

MrsBucketxx Thu 14-Feb-13 07:39:36

stealth boast

have a biscuit I get bugger all.

BambieO Thu 14-Feb-13 07:47:23

There's a lot of biscuits here and no saucers, this is a recipe for disaster!! OP will be most unimpressed smile !

MrsBucketxx Thu 14-Feb-13 07:50:13

but you dont have a mug and saucer, or is that wrong too?

GreenLeafTea Thu 14-Feb-13 07:57:32

Two years ago dh and I were really broke so agreed not to get each other presents. My dh ended up buying me some plants in a Christmas display. I was really annoyed as I could have really used something more practical with the money such as shoes, there was nowhere to put the bloody things and I was just so stressed out and busy as we were moving in the new year. It was really the last thing I needed at that moment, more things to look after!

I get the OP's feelings. It's the thoughtlessness of the gift that was the problem. Like buying someone on a diet chocolates.

BambieO Thu 14-Feb-13 07:58:56

Haha I have no idea mrsb

I'm one of those weird creatures that doesn't drink hot drinks


ScumbagCollegeDropout Thu 14-Feb-13 08:15:28

I'm kinda with you OP.

I am crap with flowers. Sure they can be nice to look at but they don't do anything. Just sit there getting all droopy and dry until I can be arsed to throw them away two months later.

I don't see the point in them.

Chocolate on the other hand...

Mosman Thu 14-Feb-13 08:21:40

I had to buy my own so the children wouldn't cotton to the fact that I want to stab him the head for fucking some tart.

Take the roses and thank god you aren't me today.

thegreylady Thu 14-Feb-13 08:24:56

My dh and I just exchange cards and a kiss in bed on Valentines Day then I get breakfast in bed :-) . Much nicer than flowers.

AllYoursBabooshka Thu 14-Feb-13 08:25:30

Oh Mosman sad

Now that's a bastard, hope you're alright.

YABU Bimba. Tell him you don't like flowers.

SnowyWellies Thu 14-Feb-13 08:32:22

Oh Mosman. sad

OP if you are real, then really I am pretty shocked by your ungratefulness. It is a nice gesture, your DH loves you. These are all good things in a world that is too often filled with pain and difficult times. (seriously). Are you the sort of person who rolls their eyes at wonky mother's day cards from children too? Don't be that person.

My FIL gets really pissed off if anyone buys him presents.... the last time he did was a few Christmases ago when he really went off on one. So now we do not do presents at Christmas.... DH and I and the Dcs secrete ourselves away in our room Christmas morning and open them privately. It is a real shame, that someone ruins it like that. Don't ruin your husband's pleasure at getting you something nice.

CuriousMama Thu 14-Feb-13 08:34:57

Mosman so sorry to hear that. What are you planning to do or is it too soon to think straight?

CuriousMama Thu 14-Feb-13 08:36:29

SnowyW why do you have Christmas with your FIL? Sounds pretty grim.

I get it, OP.
I started feeling like this about the same time I went off my stbx-husband.

DP doesn't 'do' Valentine's Day. I mind a tiny bit, because I've been conditioned to. But he does romantic things at random times throughout the year when I least expect it, which is much nicer.

He wrote me a song on Sunday smile

SnowyWellies Thu 14-Feb-13 08:51:09

Because it is all meant to be a family Christmas Curious. smile Actually, generally Christmas is a nice time, just that bit always seems a shame.

Although- when I wrote that upthread I thought to myself WHY do we pander to him like that? Okay, so he hates presents.... this year I might say 'Right kids, present opening time' and just do it in the lounge room. (Although DH and I might do ours privately).

My DH did not give me flowers, but I received three cards in his fairly obvious writing pretending to be fron a 'secret admirer' so I have told him he needs to up his game as clearly I have options grin

CuriousMama Thu 14-Feb-13 09:01:04

Please do SnowyW, you'll think back when the dcs are grown and really regret pandering if not. Why should you do this, it's crazy?

SnowyWellies Thu 14-Feb-13 09:09:34

We do tend to tip toe around him a bit anyway as he can be quite difficult (although I do genuinely love him) but you are right, Curious.

Sorry for hijack OP!

CuriousMama Thu 14-Feb-13 09:15:27

My late exFIL didn't do gifts or cards but he would never have been like this. He accepted them from us but wouldn't have ever bought any. ExMIl more than made up for him and still does. Love them both.

I'd tell him beforehand that it's not fair on the dcs so it'll save any fuss on the day. I find it very odd tbh that the allows this with dcs in the house? Even if it's for religious reasons you have to embrace all beliefs. Seems a bit passive aggressive?

Stropzilla Thu 14-Feb-13 09:17:15

Mine doesn't make an effort the rest of the year why should today be any different? I only get flowers after an argument and thatss really not the reason I want flowers!

Lucky you!

Notafoodbabyanymore Thu 14-Feb-13 09:22:16

Just been reading a thread about a woman whose DH takes all her wages, verbally abuses her and kicks her. sad


discotequewreck Thu 14-Feb-13 09:40:04

Ilovesooty, that made me laugh I.e. the woman who berated her dh for the flowers that didn't compliment the living room.

I can always rely on mn to cheer me up smile

landrover Thu 14-Feb-13 10:01:15

The cakes thread was SUCH fun!!!!! I totally agree with Bimba!!!!!! I tell my husband every year (nicely) that I would rather have a silk flower arrangement that I can keep forever!
He is getting it right now! (card and champagne and bar of chocolate) But I think Bimba is right!!!

SnowyWellies Thu 14-Feb-13 11:09:16

Ummm.... i have just read that other thread where someone got a hoover for VDay.

That would piss me right off, which makes me rethink my earlier 'just be grateful you got anything' stance.............

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