to think that "love" is just as bad as "hun"?

(88 Posts)

I see posters on here calling each other love all the time now and I really cant stand it.

Why? Surely its just as bad as hun?

TartWithACart Tue 29-Jan-13 19:28:20

Both are equally annoying and make me want to vomit in my slippers.

E320 Tue 29-Jan-13 19:30:19

Patronising - in both cases.

beautyfades Tue 29-Jan-13 19:39:27

its doesn't bother me at all luv ;) .

Peevish Tue 29-Jan-13 19:42:20

No, 'luv' would be just as dopily illiterate as 'hun'.

'Love' might be vomit-inducing, but at least gets properly spelled slightly more often.

SunshineOutdoors Tue 29-Jan-13 19:45:59

In Yorkshire 'love' is just a bit like saying 'mate' or 'pal'. Nothing sickly sweet about it. Not on a par with 'hon' here at all.

I personally don't like 'babe', although having said that I wouldn't actually mind being called that, because these things tend to be said in an affectionate, well-meaning way, not anything nasty.

SunshineOutdoors Tue 29-Jan-13 19:48:14

I think the 'hun' thing is just because it's associated with posts from another forum, not actually about the word itself (although I could be wrong). Should be 'hon' though.

andtheycalleditbunnylove Tue 29-Jan-13 19:50:01

'love' is horrible, low and vulgar.

'hun' is pretentious, meaningless nonesense.

'babe' is just pathetic.

call me mrs. mrs bunnylove with be fine.

MerylStrop Tue 29-Jan-13 19:51:38

Love can be a put down esp male builder to female householder
But in the North, men call each other love, esp in Yorks. It's just normal and affectionate
Hun I always think of as a way of being warm to internet strangers, never hear it said in real life. Maybe it's been turned on its head to be patronising, but I only ever see it liberally sprinkled through posts on here or fb about 5 times per sentence

Jinsei Tue 29-Jan-13 19:54:23

I hate "hun" or "babe". They both sound horribly false and contrived to me. On the other hand, I have no qualms about "love".

Disclaimer: I have a northern mother.

ModernToss Tue 29-Jan-13 19:54:31

'Love' is perfectly standard in the north of England, and is not a class signifier at all. It certainly isn't 'horrible, low and vulgar'. It is also immeasurably better than 'hun' or 'babe'.

P.S. Always better to spell words correctly when you're chucking around the pejoratives, bunnylove.

Mynewmoniker Tue 29-Jan-13 19:55:45

I don't mind 'Love'; it's warm and northern.

'Hon' seems American and spikey.

IYKWIM blush

mrsbunnylove Tue 29-Jan-13 19:56:54

excuse me, but i'm northern born and raised, and still resident. i assure you that 'love' is only used by low people or as a put-down.

KatyTheCleaningLady Tue 29-Jan-13 19:57:21

I don't mind "love." It's probably non-U usage, but so what?

I tend to call women I don't know "Ma'am" or "Miss" but that's because I'm American. For all I know, I sound like an idiot. I don't mean anything by it. I'm just addressing a stranger as politely as I know how.

" i assure you that 'love' is only used by low people"
WTF confused?

deleted203 Tue 29-Jan-13 20:00:49

I'm with moniker and modern. Hon seems American to me, 'babe' is a bit Essex-ey in my head, although I don't know if that's the case? 'Love' is very common round here and I'm used to being called it lots of times a day by perfect strangers. Newsagent, etc will always say 'there you go, love' as opposed to 'madam'.

The other one round here is 'duck' which I don't mind. I really dislike being called 'dear' though which strikes me as very patronising. (Overtones of 'calm down, dear'). Perhaps it depends on where you are regionally.

deleted203 Tue 29-Jan-13 20:02:12

WTF? Well I'm Northern born and raised and still living here and I would completely disagree that 'love' is only used by low people OR as a put down!

MerylStrop Tue 29-Jan-13 20:03:04

sorry bunny (are you sockpuppeting by the way, sweetie?) but you are wrong about that

mrsbunnylove Tue 29-Jan-13 20:04:29

sorry, sweaty (sp?) but i'm not. you just know the wrong people.

and i can change my name, can't i? i'm always recognisable. a theme, you know.

Love is used a lot in NI.

I still dont like it though. Maybe it just feels more like a patronising or bitchy thing to say to me because thats often how its used in NI woman to woman.

Man to woman isnt as bitchy, more like a respectful "mate".

I use love, and lovely all the time. Its because i'm awful with names, and I quite like it.

spanky2 Tue 29-Jan-13 20:07:00

Imo babe is the same as calling the love of your life chav .grin

Mynewmoniker Tue 29-Jan-13 20:08:01

" i assure you that 'love' is only used by low people"
WTF ? from me aswell......love!

AwkwardSquad Tue 29-Jan-13 20:08:28

'Love' is perfectly standard in the north of England, and is not a class signifier at all. It certainly isn't 'horrible, low and vulgar'. It is also immeasurably better than 'hun' or 'babe'.

Exactly. It's standard in the north. Also 'pet' in the north east. Nothing wrong with either. Never had them used to me as a 'put down' and if by 'low' you mean ordinary people getting on with their day to day lives and trying to just connect with each other to smooth over the little bumps, then you can bloody well count me as 'low' and proud of it. Sheesh.

BridgetBidet Tue 29-Jan-13 20:09:01

I lived in London and moved to Sheffield. Love is very rude and patronising in London but is pleasant and affectionate in Sheffield.

MiniTheMinx Tue 29-Jan-13 20:10:16

I hate all of them, we use Darrrrrrling in this house.

LadyBeagleEyes Tue 29-Jan-13 20:11:04

I like love, it's very traditionally British. Hun isn't, nor is babe.
grin at low people.

NorksofPlenty Tue 29-Jan-13 20:12:53

Wtaf are "low people"?! Horribly superior and totally inaccurate Bunny. Another Northerner here and I've never heard love used in a derogatory way, it's just something we say to each other at the end of a sentance. It's a pleasantry and I can't see any harm in it

InNeedOfBrandy Tue 29-Jan-13 20:17:34

I really like being called lovey, love or hun or B or bubs or babe or any term of endearment really.

LadyBeagleEyes Tue 29-Jan-13 20:21:32

Low people live in the Netherlands.

Pourquoimoi Tue 29-Jan-13 20:23:27

YANBU, but I hate the rise of hun everywhere, even from people you'd really not expect it from. Yuk!

LesBOFerables Tue 29-Jan-13 20:24:42

'Love' is a traditional term of endearment or friendliness in the North, and sounds more authentic to my ears than 'hun', which linguistically-speaking has only been here five minutes and sounds a bit affected and fake to me.

Hulababy Tue 29-Jan-13 20:28:21

I am from/in Yorkshire.
Love is used by people from ALL classes from what I can gather - often slightly older people ime, although also by people in shops a fair bit too.
Most definitely not used as a put down or by "low people" ime - though not altogether what we mean by "low people" if I am honest.

Hulababy Tue 29-Jan-13 20:29:45

I don't like hun at all though - not even a full word, just an abbreviation of honey, another word I'm not really a fan off. Don't like babe either.

Love is like chuck (sp?), mate, etc.

mrsbunnylove Tue 29-Jan-13 20:29:49

tell you what - you look out for how 'love' is used in future. you'll see i'm right.

mrsbunnylove Tue 29-Jan-13 20:30:23

and i'm mrs bunny, love, so i know... grin

purpleloosestrife Tue 29-Jan-13 20:30:45

sod the hon/hun/love debate ...I really want to know who these low people are?

I rather think I'd like to be one! grin

DawnOfTheDee Tue 29-Jan-13 20:33:23

I use love. As does my DH. I am 5'6". DH is 6'1". Neither of us are low. I even try to avoid bending down unless I really really have to. <blows a low raspberry>

usualsuspect Tue 29-Jan-13 20:35:32

You do talk bollocks sometimes,mrsbunnylove.

Hissy Tue 29-Jan-13 20:36:19

No love, NOTHING is quite as bad as hun.

<shudders>

#honoraryNortherner

usualsuspect Tue 29-Jan-13 20:37:03

I use 'duck' not sure how low that makes me.

DawnOfTheDee Tue 29-Jan-13 20:39:00

Lower than hen but not as low as chuck, I reckon usualsuspect

growingbytheday Tue 29-Jan-13 20:39:52

I'm from the North East (Newcastle) 'love' is used as a term of endearment or comfort or jusy an easy way to show a friendly face to strangers you may encounter. I consider those who pass judement i.e. 'low' on others, to be overly obsessed with class and sadly lacking in the niceties which demonstrate it. Hinny is also used here, but mainly by older people-I like that too so I must be chewing dirt right now! grin

HollyBerryBush Tue 29-Jan-13 20:40:08

Duck - now that does piss me off

Mynewmoniker Tue 29-Jan-13 20:41:28

Does Jeremy Kyle sometimes say "sweep" or "sweet"? Whatever; THAT'S the worst most patronising word I've EVER heard. angry

Jinsei Tue 29-Jan-13 20:42:06

Low people? hmm Maybe you're right, love, but I'm not ashamed of my roots!

"Duck" is common around here too. I don't use it but I like being called it! grin

LadyBeagleEyes Tue 29-Jan-13 20:42:16

I never liked Hen, which is very common in Scotland, though I like Pet, which is used a lot in the Highlands.

bamboostalks Tue 29-Jan-13 20:42:23

Does it really matter? It's nearly always a term of endearment, not intended to offend. I like them all if they are well meant which they usually are.

Jinsei Tue 29-Jan-13 20:45:10

My mum used to say "pet", I like that too.

Have never heard anyone use "hen" but both of my parents used to call me "chick". smile

EmpressMaud Tue 29-Jan-13 20:45:36

I don't mind 'love' and it's usually the older (and northern) generation who use it, at least that I've found. 'Luv' on the other hand...

I've said on another thread that I really dislike 'hun' (however you spell it) and would make instant judgements about the user.

I usually say dude....or man....but then I'm a lentil weaving hippy type who grew up being completely in love with Bill and Ted....what class does that make me?

LucyGoose Tue 29-Jan-13 20:49:26

Can we just agree that the absolute worst are: pet, petal and hinny!
Yes, my inlaws are from the NE.

What the heck is a hinny? It sounds like a small horse.

ugh.

EmpressMaud Tue 29-Jan-13 20:49:29

Yes, Bunny, do tell about the 'low people'. I too would love to know.

Jinsei Tue 29-Jan-13 20:51:04

I judge "hun" too. It's a bit different from the old dialect words, isn't it? I don't think hun is traditionally used anywhere in the uk, is it? It's a fairly recent import as far as I know, and I think that's why it doesn't ring true to me.

Foggles Tue 29-Jan-13 20:52:02

I am from the north and like love and pet

I hate hun. It doesn't sound genuine at all.

diaimchlo Tue 29-Jan-13 21:02:28

Being a Northerner born and bred and definitely not a 'low' person I use the term love all the time to people I interact with as a pleasant term not a put down and so does nearly everyone else I know here so Mrsbunnylove you are definitely an exception to the rule.... I would remove the last 4 letters of your user name.

As for Hun and babe can't be doing with them at all.

I'm a Yorkshire lass, I use love all the time, I'm called love all the time, in a lovely affectionate caring way. I'm v well educated, and a professional person. I'm not low or vulgar. But then again I'm not stuck up either.....

growingbytheday Tue 29-Jan-13 21:18:50

Hinny is Geordie for woman and is used by both men and women (mostly older) affectionately as also are 'bairn' (child) and 'marra' (friend). Hacky (dirty) not so much!

mumblechum1 Tue 29-Jan-13 21:22:38

I'm from the North West, but now live in the Home Counties and I sometimes call people Love just to be friendly, eg if a small kid is in my way I'll gently nudge them along and say, "excuse me love"

And I is dead posh, I is. smile

SunshineOutdoors Tue 29-Jan-13 21:23:29

Interested to hear what constitutes a 'low' person too.

TartWithACart Tue 29-Jan-13 21:38:12

Actually, I change my mind. They are both equally vile and make me want to vom only when used in a patronising way or by someone my own age/younger (why people in their early twenties insist upon calling me 'love' is unfathomable). I don't really object to being called love, hun, duck, pet, sweets, doll or babes if it's meant in a friendly way. Now that I think about it my parents call me all of the above on a regular basis confused although if DP starts I am going to LTB!

salopia Tue 29-Jan-13 22:01:47

as a nurse of 25 yrs I am delighted to be called any of these things !! bloody hell you lot, there are far worse you can be called
#

abbyfromoz Tue 29-Jan-13 22:24:21

'Love' is patronising. Sounds like an old aunt trying to give you a lesson on life. Hun is fine... It's a 'non' word.

roastednut Tue 29-Jan-13 22:24:29

What bamboostalks said. I really don't mind any of them. I can't really understand why people get irritated by it.

ImperialBlether Tue 29-Jan-13 22:31:23

I had a twelve year old say, "Excuse me, love" the other day.

LouMae Tue 29-Jan-13 22:34:42

Doesn't offend me at all. Very commonplace in Lancashire, particularly from bus drivers! I think it's quite nice and shows the person is down to earth and not up their own arse.

RandallPinkFloyd Tue 29-Jan-13 22:46:10

Isn't it all about intent thought?

If someone is calling you sonething in an attempt to patronise it doesn't matter whether its hun or love, it's just them being a twat.

If its a genuine term of endearment I couldn't give two shiny shites if its pet, chuck, duck or lovely, it's just nice to be nice.

doublemuvver Tue 29-Jan-13 23:34:14

I love "love" being in Yorkshire and all. Part of its dialect history, high and low. Detest "hun" and cringe when someone refers to me as such. Colleagues know not to call me it!

garageflower Tue 29-Jan-13 23:58:48

I don't really see the offence in any of these terms if they're said/meant in a nice or affectionate way. I say 'babe' and 'love' to my close mates and I'm not vulgar or patronising. I don't say 'hon' but that's because I just don't, not because I find it annoying. Isn't the meaning behind the word more important? I don't know anyone that uses those words to be patronising.

RafflesWay Tue 29-Jan-13 23:59:58

Gordon Bennet - some of you are SOOO easily offended. Love in Yorkshire is very warm as is Pet in Tyneside and then there is somewhere else where older folks use "Meduck" If anyone uses these to me I most definitely take it in the spirit it is meant. Patronising? Words fail me but perhaps it's another generational thing!

LouMae Wed 30-Jan-13 00:04:50

I don't think it is generational raffles I think it's regional.

RafflesWay Wed 30-Jan-13 00:26:07

Cheers for that Lou but I never heard of any Southerners being "Offended" by
Such things in the 60's and 70's but then I think we had bigger things to worry about back then and people weren't so mean spirited. So glad I grew up in a more tolerant and considerate time.

So am I still allowed to say "sweetie" and "sweetheart" or will you all have me thrown off MN? grin

loofet Wed 30-Jan-13 08:15:27

I think 'love' can be quite cocky actually. I'm just thinking of someone going 'Alright love, calm down' in a cocky tone.

I hate all pet names personally and I am a Northerner where you're either a love or a mate, not really gender assigned either. They all get my goat.

Moistenedbint Wed 30-Jan-13 08:50:02

Can't abide "hen" ... Particularly when it's regurgitated by middle-class people trying to enhance their non-existent working-class street cred.

mrsjay Wed 30-Jan-13 08:58:27

I sometimes lovey people am I not supposed too I never do it in a <head tilt> way it is just the way I type oh well never mind sorry if it annoys some people

mrsjay Wed 30-Jan-13 08:59:52

MY friend from yorkshire loves people and I think it is lovely I dont see her often but do like a love now and again from her

Mynewmoniker Wed 30-Jan-13 16:03:05

Oooooooo! and 'daaaaaaaaalin' gets my goat aswell angry

usualsuspect Wed 30-Jan-13 16:06:45

You get called 'meduck' all the time around these parts. I like it.

Jinsei Wed 30-Jan-13 16:54:52

I'm just down the road from you usual, and I like it too. And it isn't only the younger generation either. smile

usualsuspect Wed 30-Jan-13 16:58:12

'Alright meduck' is our favourite way of greeting someone.

Nancy66 Wed 30-Jan-13 16:59:52

'love' is nice...it's old-fashioned and cosy and nice.

'hun' is horrible and modern and meaningless.

I quite like 'hen' as well

evertonmint Wed 30-Jan-13 17:01:04

A love lover here smile I'm from the north, live down south and miss hearing it in common usage.

I like that it is gender neutral - it is used by anyone to anyone. I like that it is has a long history.

I think some people are confusing love (just lovely) and luv (used patronisingly by builders etc.)

Hun is awful and just makes me think of Attila rather than something sweet that I have on toast.

Well then I'm awful, low life, common... what ever because I just love and use them all;
Hun
Chick
Chicken pie
Love
Luv
Babe
Baby
Baby cakes
Bring them on, it saves trying to remember everyone's names. I am rubbish at that!

OrangeLily Wed 30-Jan-13 17:17:11

Neither are bad! It's people being nice. Get a grip and stop being a grump!

noddyholder Wed 30-Jan-13 17:20:15

My friends and I sometimes use it and some of us also use darling which has been trashed on here too. I think things like this only sound 'wrong' if you don't use them in your circle of friends and anything you do use sounds normal

beautyfades Wed 30-Jan-13 20:26:52

Can assure you bunnylove i am NOT a low person! Though i am from the north and use the word "love" how rude of you to make a statement like that!!!!!!!! UNBELIEVABLE...

OrangeLily

Having an opinion does not make me a grump. You can have your grip back smile

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