To ask son to shower every night?

(94 Posts)
mrsgregorypeck Sun 27-Jan-13 10:11:55

I ask my son (11) to have a shower every night before a school day. This leads to lots of huffing and puffing and occasional temper tantrums.

To be fair, I remember my brothers at that age were required to have a bath every Sunday and only "a good wash" at the sink in between. <<adjusts lacy shawl while settling down on rocking chair>>

Have our perceptions changed of what constitutes acceptable levels of cleanliness or am I just being unreasonable?

my chaps shower every night (pre teen and teen); it's evolved from the bathtime routine when they were wee.

No bad thing to be clean, this age is when the whiffyness can start, and we can all remember going to school with a smelly child. sad

Milliways Sun 27-Jan-13 10:20:22

At 11 mine started showering every morning - it's what wakes him up! He staggers out of bed at 6.20 - 6.30 and stands in the shower for far too long, but he does it without question and is always ready to leave for the bus at 7.20.

CreamOfTomatoSoup Sun 27-Jan-13 10:21:51

Unless he plays rugby daily then he doesn't need a shower daily. A 'gentleman's wash' at the sink, cleaning his armpits and bits, should be enough. Do his arms and legs smell?

Alliwantisaroomsomewhere Sun 27-Jan-13 10:22:31

YANBU. My 8 yr old DS is getting to the stage where he needs to shower every day. At the moment it is probably 5 days a week he showers. I don't want him to turn into DH who thinks 4 or 5 times a week for an adult male is sufficient! angry

CreamOfTomatoSoup Sun 27-Jan-13 10:22:34

i said daily too much!

Startail Sun 27-Jan-13 10:22:45

Yes if you like paying to heat water.

I don't get this washing when your not dirty habit.

DeafLeopard Sun 27-Jan-13 10:23:41

I disagree Cream - at that age the hormones are kicking in and they get quite stinky without a daily shower.

Branleuse Sun 27-Jan-13 10:26:42

not unreasonable if hes stinking.

I make mine bath every other day

redexpat Sun 27-Jan-13 10:28:39

It depends on your reason, like whether or not he smells, or if he has trouble geting up in the morning.

valiumredhead Sun 27-Jan-13 11:02:56

I have to ask ds who is the same age to shower every night or he honks of sweaty pre teen grin He does a lot of sports at school so needs to.

DoItToJulia Sun 27-Jan-13 11:05:31

My 7 yo showers most days. YANBU.

It's not negotiable in my house, they all accept it now, it's a good routine to get then in.

valiumredhead Sun 27-Jan-13 11:08:09

At 9/10 ds could get away with every other night, now it is definitely needed every day.

escape Sun 27-Jan-13 11:08:41

The OP makes a good point though - think it is totally the norm these days for all and sundry to be bathing/showering every day .
BUT, 'back in the day' we never did, and the fact remains, whilst, yes, there was always the few who needed better personal hygiene, the fact remains - most of us were perfectly clean. Teens/Tweens/Kids/Adults are no smellier now that they were then..

dinkystinky Sun 27-Jan-13 11:13:58

My kids have baths or showers every day - they'd be like that kid from Charlie Brown, all hidden in a miasma of dirt and stink, if they didnt.

Enjoy it while it lasts. Soon you won't be able to get him out of the bathroom!

daffodillady Sun 27-Jan-13 11:47:31

I was always taught that you bath/shower to stay clean not to get clean.

Locketjuice Sun 27-Jan-13 11:50:39

No that's no unreasonable...it's just hygienic!

mrsgregorypeck Sun 27-Jan-13 11:51:54

Thanks for all these supportive replies. It's not as if we are expecting him to wash at an outdoor cold tap in the yard; he has a very nice shower-room all to himself. And I look forward to tallwiv's prophecy coming true, as I'm sure it will.

LadyBeagleEyes Sun 27-Jan-13 11:52:52

Don't worry Op, girls will be on the horizon very soon, and your ds and the bathroom will have a permanent smell of lynx.
DS has been showering everyday since he started High School.

everlong Sun 27-Jan-13 11:53:15

We persuade ds (13) to shower every morning instead of night time. He says it messes it hair up if he has a shower at night!

I do think they need to shower daily though.

Tailtwister Sun 27-Jan-13 11:54:23

YANBU. I think they really need to wash properly every day at that age and if there isn't time in the morning then it's sensible to do it at night. I couldn't function without washing properly at least once a day (each morning at a minimum) and would do at night too if I had time.

I think it's a good routine to get into.

BlackholesAndRevelations Sun 27-Jan-13 12:33:24

Not sure why anyone would think this is U.

SolidSnake Sun 27-Jan-13 12:36:35

YANBU, personally I feel greasy and yuck if I don't shower every day

CecilyP Sun 27-Jan-13 12:38:37

Agree with tallwiv and LadyBeagle, so I wouldn't worry about it while he is only 11. Then you will feel glad he has his own shower room as you won't have to make your way through a fug of Lynx in order to get your own shower.

mrsgregorypeck Sun 27-Jan-13 12:46:42

Not sure either why anyone would think this was U. According to DS, though, NO-ONE ELSE has to submit to such a punishing hygiene schedule. Tried to get him to shower in the morning (which I think is the best way to start the day) but lost patience with the arguments in the morning when time is tight so insist now upon bed-time shower. Can't wait for the gentle fragrance of Lynx to be wafting through the house...

lljkk Sun 27-Jan-13 12:49:02

DS is 13 & we are lucky to herd him into the shower once a week.
I just do not have the energy to have such a battle unless strictly necessary.
Whatever bad effects this is supposed to have had in DS's life haven't materialised. Getting yelled at by his dad "You Stink!!" is about the worst of it.

complexnumber Sun 27-Jan-13 12:54:59

I am trying to remember when I started taking a shower every morning.

It was probably a lot later than I would like to think. As a student in the early 80's we (housemates and I) were too tight/broke to put the water heater on, so we would use showers in the SU building or visit a friend in halls of residence.

I doubt if I managed that 7 days a week. (Frequent wash shampoo has not been around for that long really.)

I don't think I was particularly smelly, I certainly would have been told so if I was (my friends were a delightful bunch who would have taken great pleasure in giving you a nickname, one was called BFSS George- Big Fat Stupid Smelly).

I know that I now feel really icky if I don't have a shower as soon as getting up on a work day. But I'm not convinced that to do otherwise is really such a no no.

DeafLeopard Sun 27-Jan-13 15:18:29

We regularly have half a dozen or so teen boys in the house, I can tell which ones shower daily and which ones don't.

I think back in the day when people didn't shower daily, we probably just got used to the smell and so didn't notice it.

Pandemoniaa Sun 27-Jan-13 15:41:06

According to DS, though, NO-ONE ELSE has to submit to such a punishing hygiene schedule.

Ah yes, these are the same no-one elses who are the same everyone elses that are given unlimited pocket money, a life free of bedtimes and as many X-rated video games as they can spend their unwashed time playing.

It's an old trick but no more successful now than it ever was.

YANBU either. Showering daily is a good habit to get into as well as almost always necessary. It's quicker to shower than have splashy "gentlemen's washes" too.

Pandemoniaa Sun 27-Jan-13 15:45:33

PS. Having been brought up in the those apocryphal Dark Ages where, allegedly, women lit coppers in order to heat water to to fill a tin bath in front of the fire, can I just point out that in many households, regular, daily baths or showers were just as commonplace then as today. We had two bathrooms in the 1960s. Radical as that might sound.

Adversecamber Sun 27-Jan-13 15:50:02

DS has smelly feet so does need to shower every day, he plays sport four days a week. He hates showering and washing and even switched it on once so I could hear the water but didn't get in, he was rumbled. Mates DS put his head under the shower to get wet hair but not his actual body. You need to be Sherlock Holmes to catch them out.

hoxtonbabe Sun 27-Jan-13 15:52:26

It is a must...my one has now got to the stage where he can "monitor his smell" LOL

so sometimes he will shower twice in a day grin

Almostfifty Sun 27-Jan-13 15:52:44

Ah, the no-one elses.

Funny how they're always the only one isn't it?

Ours started showering in the mornings when they went to secondary school, rather than a bath at night.

Woke them up, and made them clean and fresh to start the day. The Lynx seems to have stopped now thank goodness.

determinedma Sun 27-Jan-13 16:26:07

like lljkk I have a soap dodger. he is 11 tomorrow and the battles over bathing are exhausting and dull. I am rigidly strict on teeth twice a day, washing hands after loo but otherwise he baths when I can get him in there.
He doesnt seem unduly smelly so far

andtheycalleditbunnylove Sun 27-Jan-13 16:29:24

daily showers. bath if you don't have a shower.
get them into the habit now or they'll stink at university. most teenage boys seem to need reminders about being clean and its always at its worst three weeks after the freshers arrive.

mrsgregorypeck Sun 27-Jan-13 16:38:05

DS is also outraged by the unfairness of the days when he goes swimming and therefore has two showers that day. This, apparently, inoculates him against dirt and sweat so that he does not need a shower at all for the two following days. And, yes, I too have witnessed the head under the tap routine in a pathetic attempt to convince me that a shower has been taken. Any tips?

You are not being unreasonable, I made both my boys shower daily once they were teens/preteens. The stench would be unreasonable if they didn't.
I did walk into he classroom on a sunny day when one of the boys was 11, I gagged, and the teacher started to laugh, his response was "they are a bit ripe aren't they" From that day on there was no excuse not to get showered.

tuckingfits Sun 27-Jan-13 20:57:10

My partner's parents didn't think it was important to teach him a good hygiene routine. It is only now at the age of 37 (38 today) that I have managed to get him to succumb to a daily shower. He has a manual job. Has done since he left school. Why did he think a shower once a week/fortnight would suffice?

Had I known about his habits early on,we would not have lasted,as it was I didn't discover until after I moved in & was pregnant. In fact it was some time after that,as I worked evenings & he worked days so I assumed he showered before bed. He rarely smelled but to be honest the thought is so off putting that I cringe to think of some of the times we were intimate. Bleurgh.

It has been a long hard slog to instill in him the understanding that few of his mates who do similar work are very likely to shower upon arrival home from a hard day's labour. Had his parents done this when he was in his formative years,many an argument in our household could have been avoided.

Please endeavour to teach your sons about the importance of personal hygiene,if not for anyone else's sake but their own. Think of the breeding ground being created for bacteria...

tuckingfits Sun 27-Jan-13 21:01:26

Should have mentioned that at the age of 37 he also turned the shower on,moved his shower gel in the cubicle,stuck his feet in to make them wet enough to make wet footprints & a damp towel. No more. It got to the point that I told him it's a bad model for our son to learn from & that if he didn't buck his ideas up it was over. Extreme maybe but for me it was a matter of respect to me & our relationship (in which we were having other issues too,but this was as good a time as any to bring it up. Again).

DS1 has to shower after rugby as he's covered in mud. At the height of the rugby season he plays five times a week. On non-rugby days he likes to shower when he gets in from school, which is fair enough as he's just walked a mile and a half carrying an 8kg pack, most of it uphill. After his shower he gets into a t-shirt and pyjama bottoms or a onesie grin to do his homework, before going out again after dinner to Scouts / youth club / more rugby training.

DS2 (nearly 11) only showers every other day, he hasn't started puberty yet but his hair gets greasy quicker than it did six months or a year ago.

hoxtonbabe Sun 27-Jan-13 21:21:45

This thread is having me in fits of laughter...sometimes you do think it is only your boys...although as good as my one is with showers teeth brushing is a totally different ball game :-(

mrsgregorypeck Sun 27-Jan-13 21:38:33

Why are so many boys/men such disgusting mingers? Does anyone have a theory? The underpants stains thread also seems to back up this view, unfortunately.

Alibabaandthe40nappies Sun 27-Jan-13 21:48:01

I don't plan on mine ever getting out of the habit of a daily bath or shower before bed.

Boys smell once they hit even the very early stages of puberty, and they need to wash.

lljkk Mon 28-Jan-13 09:42:09

I am a dragon about teethbrushing, though, much trouble there myself.
It's not just males, MrsGP.

sweetestB Mon 28-Jan-13 09:51:07

I personaly find it disgusting wether anyone, regardless their age doesn't shower/bathe daily.
Unfortunately my H was brought up with the good washing in the sink mentality and it has a really bad impact in our relationship.
Habits are hard to change, so it's better to get into good ones IMO

sweetestB Mon 28-Jan-13 10:02:28

tuckingifts you said it so well. I have very similar circumstances and totally get your point.

Both my ds's (15 and 12) shower every morning. I think it helps them waken up, and I shower every morning too. When they were babies they used to get their bath in the morning, that's just how I've always done it!
They do occasionally have a bath in the evening too, one plays squash and goes camping with cadets, and the other does a lot of swimming and riding, so I don't always want them getting in to nice clean beds without getting rid of the muck that those activities produce!

OneMoreChap Mon 28-Jan-13 11:40:20

Being unreasonable to ask him repeatedly.

Ask him once, the tell him.

Boys smell and need to shower.

I prefer to shower at night, too, but many like a morning shower to start the day awake....

OneMoreChap Mon 28-Jan-13 11:40:32

s /the/then

QOD Mon 28-Jan-13 11:50:31

My dd is a minger

Now we have a new shower cubicle we can get her in there 3 times a week. She doesn't smell but she looks grimey ... Very odd as we bath/shower daily and always have.

She also won't brush her hair without a row .. That's another whole thread!

socharlotte Mon 28-Jan-13 11:53:31

I am guessing you could wash properly at a sink, if you were diligent and thorough enough- but I have too teenaged boys and I doubt this would be the case!!

sallievp Mon 28-Jan-13 12:01:38

YANBU...IMO a quick shower takes the same time as a 'strip wash'. 5 mins??Good to get into clean habits early.

OneMoreChap Mon 28-Jan-13 12:02:58

I went to a boarding school where you had baths twice a week. Showers after sports and proper washes at a sink every night.

Boys were told how to ensure pits etc. were washed, and how to clean teeth properly (and later to shave)

seeker Mon 28-Jan-13 12:11:34

I have never understood how you can wash at the sink without flooding the bathroom. I am absolutely certain my 11 year old couldn't. And why on earth have a quick shower? Surely it would be less messy, more effective and probably quicker?

seeker Mon 28-Jan-13 12:12:31

Why on earth not have a quick shower, that should read.

JacqueslePeacock Mon 28-Jan-13 12:18:38

My DS is still at the nightly bath before bed "bedtime routine" age. When do they grow out of that and into having to be cajoled into morning/evening showers?

slhilly Mon 28-Jan-13 12:34:54

Hmm. This sounds like a bit of a pointless confrontation, to be honest. Focused a bit too much on the process vs the outcomes, if you will. I presume you don't want him to smell or be dirty, and that's why you want him to shower nightly. How about trying to agree with him that smelling and being dirty is a bad thing, in terms that he will relate to (your mates will take the mickey etc). And then agreeing what it will take to not smell / be dirty, and committing to that. At 11, I really doubt he'd stink that badly if he didn't have a shower every single night.

I also think you might consider listening to him a bit while he tells you why he doesn't want to shower so often. I'd push him to go beyond the fairness point, which is a red herring. I wouldn't be surprised if he thinks that it's a waste of his time to shower every day because he doesn't smell enough to warrant it. And to be frank, he may not smell that badly yet.

Helltotheno Mon 28-Jan-13 13:51:56

if he thinks that it's a waste of his time to shower every day because he doesn't smell enough to warrant it

Yes but that's the whole point: people don't realise they smell cos they can't smell themselves. Case in point is the cold section of my local supermarket where I have to mouth breathe on a regular basis ... If I walked up to any of those people and told them they smelled minging, that would probably come as a surprise to most of them!

Which is why it's the duty of adults to teach kids how to stay clean and YANBU at all OP. I'd like my DS to shower every day ideally but at the moment, we're (grudgingly) every second day. I find that mainly, I can smell his hair and me no like, sorry. No excuse for unpleasant body smells...

valiumredhead Mon 28-Jan-13 13:52:17

At 11, I really doubt he'd stink that badly if he didn't have a shower every single night

I take it you have never been in a class of thirty eleven year olds then? grin

sweetestB Mon 28-Jan-13 13:53:40

What I don't understand is: can you wash your intimate bits on a sink? Don't these parts need attention every day?

valiumredhead Mon 28-Jan-13 13:59:39

sweet back in the 80's, so not that long ago, council houses were not required to have an inside loo/bathroom. My grandparents washed at the kitchen sink and never smelled at all, in fact my grandmother was one of the most glamourous women I have ever known. Plenty of people had to do the same and managed perfectly well. If you really can't imagine having a wash at a sink then I think it shows just how 'spoilt' we have become wrt what we find acceptable and not. I have lovely memories of the smell of Imperial Leather soap and dashing outside to the loo for wee.

How do you think people in hospital/bed rest manage to keep clean? They use a bowl of water, soap and a flannel - it's not hard it's just easier and quicker to jump in the shower.

Samu2 Mon 28-Jan-13 14:06:30

My 11 year old hates getting wet, we get tantrums and all sorts. They think he may be on the autism spectrum so it could be a part of it.

He is my smelly one though. His feet smell every day and he sweats really quickly. He has a bath once a week and a shower once a week and then I make him wash his armpits, feet and bits every morning. That was our compromise. That way he keeps smelling fresh but doesn't have to get his whole body wet every day.

I am constantly sniffing him so I know a good wash every morning is keeping him fresh for school and bed.

My 13 year old doesn't sweat at all.

DottyDot Mon 28-Jan-13 14:11:35

we've got ds's (11 and nearly 9) to every other morning - which has been a huge battle from twice a week.... hmm

The 11 year old isn't smelly yet but has very greasy hair if it's not washed. The 8 year old is sadly quite smelly on the days he doesn't shower, so we've got him to agree to go up to daily showers from when he's the grand old age of 9 (in April - roll on!).

I'm trying to persuade both of them that this is all a good thing - that it's their hormones kicking in and they're growing up into men... Sigh.

valiumredhead Mon 28-Jan-13 14:14:29

dotty why do they have to agree to showering? Surely at 8 and 11 you tell them to shower and that is that?

sweetestB Mon 28-Jan-13 14:30:19

valiumred I am not sure if your post answer my question? I'm not criticizing, just trying to understand really, since I'm from a very hot part of the world and having a standard shower daily is pretty much the norm, whilst most people have 2 showers daily. Plus we wear and wash clothes daily too for obvious reasons.
I'm not comparing cultures, I know that obviously in a cold country people tend to sweat less and there is the heating issues, but the concept of having a wash in the sink is new for me and I genuinely ask:
Do people wash their vagina, penis and anus on a sink, and if they don't, how often do they think it needed to be properly cleansed with water and soap?
I feel very yuck if I don't shower everyday and I do want my daughter to have the same habit, and I'm not judging anyone who thinks differently, I'm just curious.

aldiwhore Mon 28-Jan-13 14:35:37

I've advised my 9 year old to start showering each morning, we've talked about sweat, he's sniffed his armpits aplenty.

He does it without being ordered to, if I DID order him it would create a battle I don't think is necessary. Maybe I'm lucky.

Helltotheno Mon 28-Jan-13 14:46:15

It's very difficult to wash nether regions at a sink... a lot of spilled water and a lot of washing of ... eh.. whatever you're using to do the cleaning. With showers available, I find it hard to believe that people would choose slopping about at a sink (unless thru necessity, I accept that) to luxuriating in a lovely hot shower.

I also heart bidets because they're what you're supposed to use to wash nether regions, not sinks (just ask the French, Germans, Spanish etc smile )

Showers are a rule in our house, not a choice!!

mrsgregorypeck Mon 28-Jan-13 14:49:11

All these replies have been very interesting. DS hasn't yet hit puberty so isn't completely honking if he doesn't have a daily shower. He still smells stale and horrible, though.

We have had a lot of rows over the fact that after he is told to have a shower he comes down in pyjamas with wet hair. I then discover that his shower cabinet is completely dry. So infuriating when in other ways he is such a good boy who is keen to please.

valiumredhead Mon 28-Jan-13 14:52:51

sweet yes, you wash yourself thoroughly using soap/wash cloth and water while standing at a sink.

It really isn't that hard to keep water in a sink while having a wash - my dh manages to have a shave every day at the sink without slopping water everywhere.

seeker Mon 28-Jan-13 14:57:21

But why would you wash at the sink if there's a shower available? I understand that in the days of limited hot water people did this, but why now?

Nagoo Mon 28-Jan-13 14:57:35

My sister used to try to trick my parents with the wet hair thing. It's not just boys.

TBh I need a shower right now, and I simply CBA. I'm not particularly stinky but my hair does need a wash. No one is telling me to go. I will have one before bed. If someone made me shower right now, and I was a petulant child, I might try and get one over on them as well.

valiumredhead Mon 28-Jan-13 14:59:55

My ds has been known to run the shower and stand definitely by it to make me think he is in there - cheeky sod grin

valiumredhead Mon 28-Jan-13 15:00:19

I don't know seeker is anyone saying that they prefer washes?

Nagoo Mon 28-Jan-13 15:01:48

Actually, I am going to do the grown up version of this <sprays dry shampoo>

sweetestB Mon 28-Jan-13 15:08:47

Ok thanks for the clarification. So where the wash cloth goes after the wash? I find showers so relaxing, much more even than baths, but I might try the sink wash and see how it goes.

valiumredhead Mon 28-Jan-13 16:00:25

Wash cloths go straight in the laundry basket in this house grin

DeafLeopard Mon 28-Jan-13 16:25:02

I also don't get how it can be easier to have a strip wash at the sink than have a shower.

I worked in a nursing home where we had to do bed baths for some residents, but it was easy to do intimate areas as they were lying down on a towel, and we would use three flannels for that one area, one to wet and soap, a second to get the majority of the soap off and then another to make sure that there was no soap left on the skin.

To stand at a sink and do that would make an awful lot of water on the floor.

shemademedoit Mon 28-Jan-13 16:25:27

If my boys don't wash willingly every night, I ambush them with a handful of shampoo so they've no choice but to get in the shower blush

valiumredhead Mon 28-Jan-13 16:28:12

You can wring out flannels you know wink

MoodyDidIt Mon 28-Jan-13 16:39:07

no YANBU

my dc are only 3 and 6 and they have baths every 2 days. they usually make a fuss and say they don't want to (why do kids do this??) and soon i will start to get them to do it daily, prob in the next year or so

as others have said, i remember smelly kids at school and i never want my kids to be the smelly kid grin

also it sets them up for good habits into adulthood

I seem to remember having a weekly bath till mid-teens (we didn't even own a proper shower till then, just a rubber thing on the taps). I must have stunk. confused

From about age 10-11, if my kids don't have a shower every day (sometimes missing a day if they haven't done much), boy do I notice!

Tarlia Thu 07-Feb-13 20:55:24

hides all face cloths from guests People actually use them for washing their bits?? Urg!

I'm with the shower once or even twice a day, fresh clothes every day camp. However we are only supposed to bath baby once per week on advice from specialists, as his skin is so bad (we do sneak in an extra shower). The poor thing gets so excited on bath days, long may this last!

IvorWindybottom Thu 07-Feb-13 21:06:29

People who shower everyday should be flogged,no need for it whatsoever,what a waste of water and power therefore a waste of money and it contributes to global warming
absolulty disgracefull

Ivor, do you never exercise or work up a sweat cleaning, carrying heavy shopping, etc? I don't have a car, most of my stuff is second hand and the last time I was in an aeroplane was 1986. There's other ways to tackle global warming, you know - so less hoiking of those windy-arsed judgy pants, please.

My DS walks 30 minutes to and from school , plays rugby and does PE twice a week.
I insist he baths or showers every day.
He's just getting into the teen hormone stage. His pits can get a bit whiffy at the end of the day.

I tell him no-one wants to be the smelly child sad

(Weekends and holidays he doesn't need to wash. He just smells 'little boy' when he's dossing about at home)

Adversecamber Fri 08-Feb-13 09:17:32

Two flannels were used when I was a dc, one for the face and one for the bum.
We bathed on a Sunday evening only and we had to share water. Paraffin heater in the bathroom. I shower every day now but very quickly, I suppose I am quite puritanical in my outlook on life and see modern stuff as self indulgent. The good thing about that is I rarely spend money.

HousewifeFromHeaven Fri 08-Feb-13 09:38:16

Of course no one wants their kids to be the 'smelly' one.

Some children don't have enough clothes so have to wear the same ones a lot. Not enough money to wash the clothes a lot.
Not enough money to have the water on a lot etc etc.

That combination will create a smell. Not showering everyday at 11 doesn't, especially if clean clothes are worn IMO.

HousewifeFromHeaven Fri 08-Feb-13 09:40:01

Meant to add

Showering everyday is quite acceptable. Fact grin

Chopstheduck Fri 08-Feb-13 09:43:49

I think they all go through a phase of soap dodging. Mine have tried avoiding it altogether, pretending to have a shower by running it and not getting in, or diving in then straight back out without actually washing.

They can shower when they want, but they will shower once a day unless it is a pyjama day at the weekend or something. If they refuse to get in, they won't get dinner/bfast until they HAVE showered. A few times holding our noses when she walked in worked wonders for my eldest.

irregularegular Fri 08-Feb-13 09:47:34

Well my 9 and 10 yr old only bath/shower twice a week. The hormones haven't kicked in yet and they really don't smell.!

DH and I do both shower every day. DS and DD know that they will need to when they are older. I'm monitoring the situation - I may change the routine when they go to secondary as a pre-emptive measure.

I know I didn't bathe daily as a child and I'm sure my friends didn't either. It does seem rather wasteful of water, energy and effort unless they are actually mucky, or just want to.

sweetestB Fri 08-Feb-13 12:55:44

I WASH my hair EVERY DAY, or every other day Ivo are you listening.?
I also don't drive, don't travel, buy local, and recycle/upcycle/re-use as much as I can.
And I absolutely hate waste and avoid it.
My dd is learning this very well.
But I won't give up my daily showers and fresh clothes.
It's essential for my well being and self esteem

But my husband is opposite
and I respect people are different and have different needs.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now