AIBU? DS wants to go sledging, I've said no because......

(35 Posts)
januaryjojo Fri 18-Jan-13 13:41:31

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

It's probably a more effective consequence than the suspension from school.

Well done, you did the right thing.

Why was he fighting?

sannaville Fri 18-Jan-13 13:44:29

Hmm I don't know on this one. Fair enough if his siblings still had to go to school then obv no way would I but schools are closed so he would be home anyway and it rarely snows. I'd let him out after tea after he has dulled for a but

sannaville Fri 18-Jan-13 13:44:44

Sulked for a bit!!

Pancakeflipper Fri 18-Jan-13 13:46:01

I think good on you. YANBU.

He can rant all he likes but the suspension from school is a biggie isn't it? And the fun opportunity of sledging with friends - well he might think twice and realise there's consequences to be had.

Katz Fri 18-Jan-13 13:47:07

suspended from school would equal grounded at home too, so therefore no sledging. Once the suspension has been served then the grounded if appropriate would also be lifted.

If it had been nice and the others were going to the park after school would he have been allowed?

LaCiccolina Fri 18-Jan-13 13:48:39

I agree with u if u have suspended all other treats too as part of punishment so ie before snow because if behaviour he lost access to mobile/TV in own room/sweets etc.

If he still had all other treats so to speak and only punishment was just suspension then probs u are bu only because it was the lazier approach to discipline.

I'm guessing u were a rather than b so suspect I'm on ur side...?

januaryjojo Fri 18-Jan-13 13:55:43

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BeanJuice Fri 18-Jan-13 14:00:48


januaryjojo Fri 18-Jan-13 14:01:48

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

McNewPants2013 Fri 18-Jan-13 14:03:05


SkinnybitchWannabe Fri 18-Jan-13 14:03:48

YADNBU There's no way I'd let my son go out if he'd been suspended..stick to your guns and don't give in at all

TroublesomeEx Fri 18-Jan-13 14:03:51


Although it sounds like there might be more going on for him if he's happy to do school work from the school website whilst he's on suspension.

Have you spoken to school about him?

januaryjojo Fri 18-Jan-13 14:09:06

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Cherriesarelovely Fri 18-Jan-13 14:10:49

Well done OP. You are doing exactly the right thing in showing him how seriously you take his suspension

Inaflap Fri 18-Jan-13 14:12:27

As a teacher, can I just say that I wish there were more parents like you. You are doing the right thing but I would let him go out adter school officially finishes.

TroublesomeEx Fri 18-Jan-13 14:17:59

Well it sounds like you're doing everything you can do then - including taking the suspensions seriously.

I think I would agree with Inaflap though and let him go out when the school day officially ends. He needs to keep up with his friends and let off some steam too.

LaCiccolina Fri 18-Jan-13 16:41:10

I can't think of a damn thing else u can do either. Apart from talking. And I doubt he's interested in that.....?

Reaa Fri 18-Jan-13 16:45:46

You have done the right thing smile

TidyDancer Fri 18-Jan-13 16:48:00

You have absolutely done the right thing. No doubt at all.

freddiefrog Fri 18-Jan-13 16:52:49


Suspension from school would earn a grounding at least from me

freddiefrog Fri 18-Jan-13 16:53:47

Sod it, posted to soon

Suspension from school would earn at least a grounding from me, so they wouldn't be going out whatever the reason

CremeEggThief Fri 18-Jan-13 17:00:07

Yep, YANBU. He deserves it!

StuntGirl Fri 18-Jan-13 17:11:24

Suspension would equal grounding here too, so YANBU. I hope you can get to the bottom of his behaviour problems soon.

Goldmandra Fri 18-Jan-13 17:14:29

I think you are doing exactly the right thing by making sure the punishment is a punishment but I agree that going out after school would have finished seems fair.

The fact that he is happy to sit at home doing school work would concern me. Has he been seen by CAMHS?

Could he be getting suspended from school deliberately because it's easier to cope at home?

bedmonster Fri 18-Jan-13 17:15:07

YANBU. It's serious and maybe he will realise it now when he's not going to get to enjoy the snow.

Smellslikecatspee Fri 18-Jan-13 17:15:51

Hope you get whats at the bottom of his acting out too.

In our family grounding meant that you did not leave the house except for school/PT job etc.

Its his bad luck it snowed/ schools out


But if comes down and apologises for being a stroppy brat and screaming at you, then I'd be inclined to let him go tomorrow. smile

Yfronts Fri 18-Jan-13 17:28:13

Well done. I agree with you and would have done the same.

polkadotsrock Fri 18-Jan-13 17:34:20

I wouldn't be letting him out after school time either, if he's grounded then he's grounded. Totally the right thing to do.

Bobyan Fri 18-Jan-13 17:38:49

Stick to your guns, you need to carry on being firm and consistent.

Startail Fri 18-Jan-13 17:48:13

I remember DS1 from next door coming round to borrow some tool or another for DS2.

DS2 was not allowed out due to being suspended from school.

DS1 said DS2 was very fed up of being grounded and we agreed that was exactly the point.

If he spent 3 days chasing about on his bike, it would be a pretty useless punishment.

I don't think his mum enjoyed having him stuck at home either.

feralgirl Fri 18-Jan-13 18:03:05

I think I'm right in saying that, when excluded, students are still supposed to be at home (theoretically) studying and accompanied by an adult. At my school we have exclusion packs of work that kids have to complete. We also have to notify the police and the EWO when we do a fixed term exclusion and if kids are spotted out and about then they are picked up and taken home (although I imagine this would be impossible if an exclusion coincided with a snow day).

In a circuitous way, I am saying that no, YADNBU!

WhateverTrevor Fri 18-Jan-13 18:20:28

Circuitous, like that word I am going to use it tomorrow !
Op Yanbu and I feel for you, but have no words of wisdom.

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