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To refuse to take 3 points on my licence for speeding when I wasn't the driver

(254 Posts)
hmc Wed 16-Jan-13 20:14:21

....because that's called perverting the course of justice and if found out it attracts a custodial sentence

I have a clean licence. They have a lot of points and need to drive for their job

scurryfunge Wed 16-Jan-13 20:15:32

Who is asking you to this?

hmc Wed 16-Jan-13 20:15:57

h

nennypops Wed 16-Jan-13 20:16:05

YANBU. People who lie about these things tend to get found out, and as you say it just makes it much, much worse for both of you.

Boomboomboomboom Wed 16-Jan-13 20:16:33

YNBU. Do not do it. Speeder needs to suck it up, and if it takes them over 12 points they can make a hardship plea to try and keep their license.

StuffezLaBouche Wed 16-Jan-13 20:16:37

Er no. Don't take them. And it's fairly dickish to ask someone to ask you to, tbh.

hmc Wed 16-Jan-13 20:16:38

(as in husband) - might not be recognisable without the d in front!

Catchingmockingbirds Wed 16-Jan-13 20:16:46

Has someone asked you to pretend you were driving when they were actually doing the driving and was speeding?

If so yanbu. If they need their car for work they shouldn't have been speeding in the first place.

Zavi Wed 16-Jan-13 20:16:55

YABVR.

Refuse to do it. Its against the law for you to do so. About time the other person started taking responsibility for their actions.

scurryfunge Wed 16-Jan-13 20:17:15

Don't do it. The true driver has to take the consequences. It will attract a far greater problem if found out.

hmc Wed 16-Jan-13 20:17:22

Apparently I am an 'unsupportive wife'

ilovesooty Netherlands Wed 16-Jan-13 20:17:25

Don't do it. It's both illegal and totally immoral. Your husband shouldn't even be asking you to do this.

bureni Wed 16-Jan-13 20:18:08

Was the car yours and if so who was driving at the time of the offence? If the offence was caught by a speed camera you can request to see a picture of the car and the driver taken by the camera but it is also an offence not to tell who was actually driving the car.

hmc Wed 16-Jan-13 20:18:21

Tell me about it! I agree!

VBisme Wed 16-Jan-13 20:18:29

You'll get into trouble if you try - they can usually tell the difference bwteen a male and female driver.........

scurryfunge Wed 16-Jan-13 20:18:49

Point out that you couldn't be any less supportive whilst you are in prison.

EasilyBored Wed 16-Jan-13 20:18:58

He's a dick for even asking. Plus, they take photos, and I'd imagine it would be pretty obvious who was driving.

hmc Wed 16-Jan-13 20:19:27

I'm not budging. I won't do it.

It's his car, I was the passenger. 79 on a dual carriageway (bit harsh - hardly boy racer, but still a speeding offence)

ilovesooty Netherlands Wed 16-Jan-13 20:20:22

Good for you. What a dick he is.

hmc Wed 16-Jan-13 20:20:31

Don't worry I am not contemplating it - I just intend to show him this thread so that he can see he is being unreasonable and get off my case

Depends. I would for dh if be got them all at going through a 30 at 36. He's a bit dozy but doesn't speed much.

I'm not going to lose our house, his job for 3 points.

HeathRobinson Wed 16-Jan-13 20:21:41

YANBU. I wouldn't do it.

FelicityWasSanta Wed 16-Jan-13 20:22:42

Wow. This sort of pressure is not an every day situation.... Is he always this much of an arse?

landofsoapandglory Wed 16-Jan-13 20:23:21

YANBU.

Has he got lots of points because he continues to speed? Will he only stop once they ban him from driving for a while?

hmc Wed 16-Jan-13 20:24:31

This will put him onto 9 points, and he will drop back down to 6 in March when an old 3 points expire. He drives around 40,000 miles a year so argues that he will be caught again. His previous speeding offences have all been pretty marginal in fairness - but he will just need to set his cruise control to 70 /40/30 (whatever is relevant) and not derogate from that. It's tough on him but its not my fault and I am not breaking the law to get him out of it

LittleChimneyDroppings Wed 16-Jan-13 20:25:24

So if he gets the points he loses his job?

CloudsAndTrees Wed 16-Jan-13 20:25:25

YANBU.

What will be the consequences if you don't?

scurryfunge Wed 16-Jan-13 20:25:25

Wow, Laurie, would your DH really risk the job and home for the sake of 6 mph?

hmc Wed 16-Jan-13 20:25:35

He gets stressed and then becomes unreasonable. He usually comes around in the end

ENormaSnob Wed 16-Jan-13 20:26:50

No way would I do this for dh. Or anyone else.

It's his own stupid fault.

Presumably he knew he already had points yet continued to speed?

hmc Wed 16-Jan-13 20:27:03

He doesn't lose his job - he is just fearful that further speeding offences may occur within the next 3-4 years putting him at 12

Locketjuice Wed 16-Jan-13 20:28:23

I would take them.

irishkitkat Wed 16-Jan-13 20:28:44

TBH I probably would. I would request the evidence of speeding first to see if there's any clear indication of who was the driver and if it was possible I would take the points. I know it's not ethical or legal and I would be enraged at DH for putting me in that position but that's what I would do. My DCs life I.e. house, food on the table etc depends on my DH and I earning and I wouldn't risk it all for 3 points. Sorry you've been put in this position and I don't think you're unreasonable whatever you decide sad

hmc Wed 16-Jan-13 20:29:34

I have suggested to him asking for the video evidence. He wasn't impressed

AnnoyingOrange Wed 16-Jan-13 20:29:57

He needs to buy one of those devices that tell you what speed he should be doing and whee the speed cameras are. And then take notice of it

hellhasnofurylikeahungrywoman Wed 16-Jan-13 20:30:25

Tell him to cut his speed then he wouldn't be in this position.

irishkitkat Wed 16-Jan-13 20:30:27

Sorry HMC just seen that your DH won't lose his job. In those circs I wouldn't take the points.

Abra1d Wed 16-Jan-13 20:30:32

'Depends. I would for dh if be got them all at going through a 30 at 36. He's a bit dozy but doesn't speed much.

I'm not going to lose our house, his job for 3 points.'

That would doing more than 20% over the speed limit, you would be perjuring yourself for.

RuleBritannia Wed 16-Jan-13 20:31:27

I agree with the others. You should not take the blame. It would be against the law.

Having said that, <just wondering> during that journey on the dual carriageway, did you plead with him ask him to slow down?

ENormaSnob Wed 16-Jan-13 20:31:34

So he wants you to do it just in case he decides to speed in future? hmm

Is he normally such a tool or just a bit thick?

ilovesooty Netherlands Wed 16-Jan-13 20:31:50

If it only takes him to 9 and he's going to lose 3 in March he'll just have to be more careful in future, won't he?

No, you shouldn't take the points, why both risk being prosecuted for a criminal offence? quite apart from the fact that they are his points due to his bad driving and he needs start driving within the speed limit. TBH if his job depends on it then he should be more on the ball about his speed and driving altogether. It's not tough on him- the limit is there for a reason.

hmc Wed 16-Jan-13 20:32:16

AnnoyingOrange - will look for one of those! I think it probably is easy to lapse in concentration and do 79 in a 70 - perhaps when overtaking....especially when you drive 4x the average motorists annual mileage. It sounds like a useful tool - but he does need to take note of it

echt Wed 16-Jan-13 20:32:20

"His previous speeding offences"?

"He will get caught again"?

He just doesn't seem to care or accept any responsibility.

An arse for breaking the speed limit and an even bigger arse for wanting you to break the law to excuse his feckless attitudes.

landofsoapandglory Wed 16-Jan-13 20:32:39

He will only get caught again if he carries on speeding. Tell him to set his cruise control and drive within the limits.

EarnestDullard Wed 16-Jan-13 20:33:01

"he is just fearful that further speeding offences may occur within the next 3-4 years putting him at 12"??

Is he aware that speeding is something he is doing, not something that happens to him? Tell him to be take responsibility for his actions and stop breaking the speed limit. Arse (him, not you).

AnnoyingOrange Wed 16-Jan-13 20:33:32
Pippinintherain Wed 16-Jan-13 20:33:59

Well if he stops speeding he won't get caught will he?

It's not difficult to actually obey the speed limit offs.

BellaVita Wed 16-Jan-13 20:34:12

He needs to control himself in the roads.

What ENorma said.

I am speechless, really I am.

KumquatMae Wed 16-Jan-13 20:34:16

If you're worried that you might get more points, OP'S husband, how about you just don't drive above the speed limit?
Hth smile

Pippinintherain Wed 16-Jan-13 20:34:17

*ffs

polkadotsrock Wed 16-Jan-13 20:34:45

No offer of a 'bad driver school'? I was given the option and took it with open arms!!! Although I think it depends on what area you are in

hmc Wed 16-Jan-13 20:34:50

Thanks AnnoyingOrange

marquesas Wed 16-Jan-13 20:35:17

Why is he "fearful that other speeding offences may occur"? Does his car have a mind of it's own that overrides him driving within the speed limit (is he Knight Rider grin).

He'll have to do what I and lots of others and I'm sure you do and do his very best not to speed.

hmc Wed 16-Jan-13 20:35:32

He doesn't think he will be offered a bad driver school because he has done one in the past year

FelicityWasSanta Wed 16-Jan-13 20:35:44

He seems to have no idea where the brake is. How odd.

FloweryDrawers Wed 16-Jan-13 20:37:02

So he wants you to take the points because he's basically saying that he's going to speed and get caught again in the course of the next 3-4 years.

So if you do take the points, what will you do WHEN he does it again?

Don't be guilted into doing this by any talk of "you" risking the house, DCs' livelihood or any of that. HE is doing the risking. If he doesn't want the points, then he bloody well stops speeding, using any of the technology now available to help him do this.

McNewPants2013 Wed 16-Jan-13 20:38:22

He needs to cut his speed, so this is his 3rd speeding offence in under 5 years.
surely he would of learnt his lesson by now.

and no i wouldn't take the points, i have had my licence 9 years and not a single point has been put on there.

www.nopenaltypoints.co.uk/SpeedAwarenessCourse.html

perhaps he could get himself on one of these courses.

maddening Wed 16-Jan-13 20:38:49

Well it's illegal isn't it?

BigStickBIWI Wed 16-Jan-13 20:39:25

Your (D)H is being a twat, hmc. (Sorry. I'm guessing you probably already know that wink)

If his job relies on him having a driving licence, then he needs to make sure he drives within the speed limit so he doesn't risk losing it.

If he can't concentrate on keeping his speed within the limit, then he is also guilty of driving without due care and attention.

Twattybollocks Wed 16-Jan-13 20:39:26

Do not take the points. You do the crime you face the consequences. He is the one who is speeding, he needs to stop speeding, not carry on and expect you to carry the can. For the record I have personal experience of this, the driver lost their license even though someone else had taken points for them several times.

ClaraDeLaNoche Wed 16-Jan-13 20:39:26

It's absolutely up to you. I wouldn't be horrified if you did say it was you driving, it's not a big deal and people do it all the time.

hmc Wed 16-Jan-13 20:39:47

Must admit - I never, ever speed in 30's or 40's etc (built up areas - risk to pedestrians), but like practically everyone else I see on the motorway / dual carriageway I do 75-80 sometimes on motorways... so I have some sympathy with him at 79 (I would however be highly censorious of him if it was 85/90 though). But it changes nothing - he has to take the rap.

No scurry, of course he wouldn't deliberately be risking his home and job - he's just dozy in the mornings and he's only ever got points from going slightly over in a 30.

If he drove through 4 like that in a short period of time he could easily get 12 points. Where he got 3 was on a dual carriageway in Watford where you go from 60 to 30 very quickly - it was that unreasonable they got rid of the camera.

Most people have been a bit dozy and got 3 points. I think if he'd had that happen in a very short period of time - in a time not long enough to have got the letter for the first 3 through the door then I'd take them.

scurryfunge Wed 16-Jan-13 20:40:38

I find it strange that some people on this thread are prepared to go to prison in order to preserve their partner's driving licence. Not much good to your children if you are in Holloway?

specialsubject Wed 16-Jan-13 20:41:36

so he is such a bad driver that he cannot a) control his speed b) can't drive and keep within speed and c) even after a training course still can't do what the rest of us can?

he is also such a total ARSE that he thinks the rules don't apply to him. Don't take the points. The only thing he should be doing on the road is sweeping it.

are you Mrs Chris Huhne, or is there more than one of these arrogant neanderthals about?

McNewPants2013 Wed 16-Jan-13 20:41:36

but like practically everyone else I see on the motorway / dual carriageway I do 75-80 sometimes on motorways

I hope that is a joke, I never speed. Speed limits are there for a reason

Porkster Wed 16-Jan-13 20:41:55

He really needs to stop speeding (states the bleedin' obvious).

We have friends who have done the taking points for each other thing, and not just one couple we know, at least 3.

Portofino Wed 16-Jan-13 20:41:59

a lapse of concentration? I pased my driving test nearly 26 years ago and have NEVER had a speeding ticket. It is not THAT hard!

StickEmUp Wed 16-Jan-13 20:42:00

He's done a speed course already?! hmm
Gosh. I can't believe anyone would say please take the points. Let alone a person who claims to love you. I assume a 'H' does this nowadays. Love bit I mean

keely79 Wed 16-Jan-13 20:42:47

YANBU - it is up to him not to speed. There is no-one forcing him to do so.

Portofino Wed 16-Jan-13 20:42:54

It's a limit, not a target as some wise MNetter said once....

specialsubject Wed 16-Jan-13 20:42:56

ps and I don't speed on the motorway either. Apart from it being against the law, anyone who does must get free petrol. Drag goes up as square of speed.

ClaraDeLaNoche Wed 16-Jan-13 20:43:04

Well if challenged one could just say Oh silly me, I thought I was driving that day. Doh.

AngryTrees Wed 16-Jan-13 20:43:42

Get him to read this:

www.dailyecho.co.uk/news/9968897.MP_s_speeding_points_trial_set_for_next_year/

Perverting the course of justice trial- this MP and his wife did exactly what your husband is trying to persuade you to do.

hmc Wed 16-Jan-13 20:44:04

No its not a joke. Even my 80 year old father clocks 76mph sometimes!

Chris Hammond is considering raising the maximum speed limit to 80 mph

HecateWhoopass Wed 16-Jan-13 20:44:14

Hell no. Not unreasonable.

If someone does something, why the hell should they get to pass on the consequences of their choice onto someone else?

It's not difficult to stay within the speed limit. If you choose to not do so - you make that choice knowing that if you get caught - there are consequences. those are YOUR consequences.

If he doesn't want to get any more points, then I'll let him into a little secret how this can be achieved.

come closer,

closer

shhhhhhh...right up close...

DON'T BLOODY SPEED!!

CunningPlan Wed 16-Jan-13 20:44:50

If he can't concentrate on keeping his speed within the limit, then he is also guilty of driving without due care and attention.

^ This. I take the point that almost everyone has done 80 on the motorway, but if you do, you have to suck it up if you get caught. It's no use breaking the law (and endangering lives no less) and then whining that it isn't fair.

hmc Wed 16-Jan-13 20:45:04

Philip Hammond, I mean! (Chris must be an old boyfriend)

AnnoyingOrange Wed 16-Jan-13 20:46:32

Is he still driving that high performance German car? He needs to buy something slower smile

comingintomyown Wed 16-Jan-13 20:46:48

No way would I take them and that was before hearing hes done a course already on managing his driving hmm

landofsoapandglory Wed 16-Jan-13 20:48:18

Most people have been a bit dozy and got 3 points.

I haven't, I've had my licence 25 years this year and haven't had any points, DH is the same and has had his almost 31 years.

Maybe it's time to make people resit their tests if they clock up six points within a two year period, like they do new drivers.

carlywurly Wed 16-Jan-13 20:48:48

I wouldn't. You also have to declare it to car insurers and if you end up getting any more within 5 years, you will end up with a high premium. His must be pretty bad already, but that's his issue..

Theas18 Wed 16-Jan-13 20:49:09

Just say no OP.

To the other half- why are you such a dim idiot? You can cut your speed and drive at the limit for the road. Because you clearly are arrogant enough to think you know better and are "such" a good driver that the rules don't apply to you, isn't a good enough excuse. They apply to everyone.

OP. why do you, and yor children Contine to put yor lives at risk by being driven, in excess of the speed limit on the road? Driving at or below the limit is the safe way to look after your family. He clearly doesn't see this.

HoneyDragon Wed 16-Jan-13 20:57:12

Dh has just commented that he drives on average a thousand miles a week and that amount of driving should make you a better safer driver, not one more likely to be caught speeding.

HoneyDragon Wed 16-Jan-13 20:58:35

Oh and dh has been driving 30 years and kept his licence clean

thegreylady Wed 16-Jan-13 20:59:37

Any chance of a course instead of points-I was offered the option?
Don't take them YANBU-all he has to do is keep to the speed limit off motorways.

Snorbs Wed 16-Jan-13 21:00:52

If he is unobservant enough to be caught speeding three times then it's time he realises that he's crap at it and he should give up trying.

Plus if his car control is so poor that he sees it as inevitable that he will get even more points, he needs to consider going on an advanced driving course to teach him some skills.

I've been driving 23 years and I'm a pretty careful driver (ex police/mod drivers so have done advanced driving skills) but even I have 3 points.

I think it very much depends where you live - I was fine driving in Scotland and the north east where there is much less traffic but the south east where I live now is insane for speed cameras.

There was a camera catching people in London yesterday described in the daily mail - box junction, you can't see the end of it clearly - only 4 cars can enter without getting caught because of the next set of lights - it catches a driver every 3 minutes. Totally unreasonable and unpredictable.

McNewPants2013 Wed 16-Jan-13 21:02:52

thegreylady He doesn't think he will be offered a bad driver school because he has done one in the past year

Sallyingforth Wed 16-Jan-13 21:04:29

to hmc's husband...
You are a fucking idiot to continue speeding when you've been caught several times before.

But trying to involve your wife in a far more serious crime that could involve her going to jail is unforgiveable. This forum is fairly relaxed when it comes to swearing but if I was to describe what I think of you my post wouldn't be here for you to read.

Grow up! And learn to take your punishment like a man instead of expecting someone else to do it for you.

20 years driving here, no points and I used to do 40k a year too. Your DH is an arse, quite frankly.

BartletForTeamGB Wed 16-Jan-13 21:04:57

"No scurry, of course he wouldn't deliberately be risking his home and job - he's just dozy in the mornings and he's only ever got points from going slightly over in a 30."

Gosh, I hope he doesn't accidentally kill a child one morning because "he's just dozy in the mornings."

exexpat Wed 16-Jan-13 21:05:51

It is a criminal offence - just ask Chris Huhne MP and his ex-wife. I'd suggest you get him to read that, then tell him to stop being so stupid and driving so fast.

lottiegarbanzo Wed 16-Jan-13 21:06:41

Haven't you both heard of the case (as in court) of Chris Huhne and his ex-wife? That's former minister Chris Huhne - who lost his job becuse he's on trial for the serious offence of asking his then wife to take his points.

hmm

Yeah, that's the same. hmm Being a bit dozy and not clocking your doing 36 instead of 30 at 6.30am.

And running over children.

bureni Wed 16-Jan-13 21:09:42

He has no chance of getting away with asking you to take the blame, the speed camera will have recorded the reg number, car and driver. He should just man up and admit he was a total dickhead (again)

lockets Wed 16-Jan-13 21:10:11

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

merrymouse Wed 16-Jan-13 21:21:23

No YANBU.

At some point he has to learn to obey the speed limit. If he has done a speeding course in the last year, has just got another ticket, and thinks it is inevitable that he will get 3 more points in the next 12 weeks should he really have a job that involves so much driving?

At what point would he decide to take responsibility for his driving - when you both have 9 points on your licenses and can take no more courses?

SoftKittyWarmKitty Wed 16-Jan-13 21:27:51

I've been driving over 20 years and I disagree with the seemingly widely held view that everyone speeds. I don't, in fact I actively try not to. It's not worth it.

Why does he repeatedly speed? Can't he just set off earlier if he doesn't want to be late, or does it make him feel all manly to go fast? There are some very sad stories on this thread from last month. He should read them.

Your H has committed a criminal act. If you take the points, you will have too.

SoftKittyWarmKitty Wed 16-Jan-13 21:30:24

Actually I hope he does get caught again and banned from driving. The roads will be much safer without the likes of him on them.

hmc Wed 16-Jan-13 21:35:19

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

Don't take the points for him, he's an idiot.
I've been driving 30 years and never had a ticket for speeding or parking, the only one I ever got was for going through the wrong lane to pay a bridge Toll in San Francisco, and I'll say not my fault, they had completely changed how it's done since the last time I went through, the picture they took must have been me with money in my hand sticking out the window, wondering where the toll collector was and a look of WTF on my face!

hmc Wed 16-Jan-13 21:36:09

Fortunately for you I am simultaneously writing an assignment so don't have time to give you a through mauling for your last post

ilovesooty Netherlands Wed 16-Jan-13 21:38:45

it's not a big deal and people do it all the time

Is that the message you give your children in terms of observing the law?

ShellyBoobs Wed 16-Jan-13 21:40:21

If he is unobservant enough to be caught speeding three times ...

He's been caught 4 times in the last 3 years, Snorbs.

2 x speeding already on his licence.
1 x speeding resulting in bad driver course.
1 x speeding he's trying to get OP to shoulder.

Also, I thought that when a car owner responded that they weren't the driver at the time of the offence, the photos were checked to try to identify the driver if possible and catch anyone committing perjury (as it's not uncommon)?

Floggingmolly Wed 16-Jan-13 21:48:15

Are you serious, Laurie? Your dh sometimes breaks the speed limit because he's just dozy in the mornings????
That's what points on your licence are for. To ultimately get dangerous drivers off the road.

McNewPants2013 Wed 16-Jan-13 21:55:46

i agree with SoftKittyWarmKitty.

He is a repeat offender of speeding, and i for 1 don't want reckless drivers on the road.

No, he got points once from an unreasonably positioned camera - but I can imagine he's more likely to speed on quiet roads at 6.30 am.

It's a total myth that 'Speed Kills'. Bad driving kills, not speed. Which is why they will put it up to 80 on motorways - it will have no effect on deaths.

ShellyBoobs Wed 16-Jan-13 21:57:03

You might expect that already having 6 points on his lcence would help him focus on his speed, tbh.

Do you think he maybe ought to get a smaller engined car since he can't keep this one under control, hmc?

SecretNutellaFix Wed 16-Jan-13 22:03:16

Laurie- surely it follows that drivers who knowingly drive over the speed limit are bad drivers?

They are deliberately ignoring the rules that re there for the safety and wellbeing of all road users.

Sure, deliberately and wilfully ignoring them makes you a twat and a bad driver.

Accidentally going over occasionally, not so much. It's a mistake, people make mistakes every day.

letsgomaths Wed 16-Jan-13 22:13:02

WARNING: sometimes when they send you the question asking "Who was driving", they [b]already know[/b].

Likewise, when the police pull you over and ask "who owns this car", "is it insured" etc, they [b]already know[/b].

Lie at your peril!

letsgomaths Wed 16-Jan-13 22:13:40

Oops, not used to the MN method of bold here, automatically doing tags as for other forums!

echt Wed 16-Jan-13 22:18:27

I agree with SoftKitty. Hard to see what's unkind about hoping a lawbreaker gets caught and taken away from where they're doing harm.

Just transpose SoftKitty's wish to any other crime. Sounds reasonable to me.

OP's response to SoftKitty bang out of order.

mercibucket Wed 16-Jan-13 22:23:32

So the dual carriageway was not a 40 or 50 mph then? Unlucky to get caught doing 79 but he'll just have to take the points and spend the next few years actually driving to the speed limit or below. It might focus his mind a bit!

You need 12 points within 3 years to lose your license so if 3 of his points are coming off in march he should be ok.

The fact that he's a total douchebag is another matter.

GrimmaTheNome Wed 16-Jan-13 22:35:03

>It's a total myth that 'Speed Kills'
No, its not. Its the laws of physics.

MarinaIvy Wed 16-Jan-13 22:37:53

voice Isn't it obvious? OP isn't doing the typing any more; it's the entitled dick she has for a husband.

I sometimes speed. I never do in slower areas - that's where children and other people walk. I do a bit on motorways, but if I got points, I'd be a bigger man than HMC's new typist.

GrimmaTheNome Wed 16-Jan-13 22:38:41

...though to be sure, it depends where you are and what you hit - hence 30 limits where there are likely to be pedestrians is important. If a dozy driver at 6:30 hits the paper boy, he will be more likely to cause worse injury or death if he's speeding simply because energy is proportional to speed squared.

merrymouse Wed 16-Jan-13 22:41:00

No Laurie, speed kills.

In the same way, falling off a tower block tends to be more fatal than falling from a chair.

polkadotsrock Wed 16-Jan-13 22:41:01

I get what softkitty is saying but that would mean he would be jobless and op and her dcs would all be suffering for his mistakes, so not nice for OP to hear.
As a slight aside would they really allocate scant resources to sending out letters asking who was driving when they know who was just to catch people out? Is that not entrapment or something? < no sarcasm here, genuinely wondering

GrimmaTheNome Wed 16-Jan-13 22:41:58

Anyway, OP - the way to be a supportive wife is to help your H find some technology to help him stick to the limits. My satnav gives warnings of fixed cameras, and accurate speed which I find easier to keep an eye on than the car speedo.

GrimmaTheNome Wed 16-Jan-13 22:43:07

> he would be jobless
I'm pretty sure the OP said that wouldn't be the case - so long as he doesn't break the limit yet again.

polkadotsrock Wed 16-Jan-13 22:44:21

She did indeed, I was talking about what softkitty said- hoping he gets banned.

merrymouse Wed 16-Jan-13 22:44:25

As hmc's husband will know from his speeding course.

Meglet England Wed 16-Jan-13 22:47:37

yanbu. It's tough shit on him, if he can't drive properly he has to face the consequences.

I never understand people going over the speed limit, IME it's easy-peasy to stick to 30/40/60/70 etc. I don't go over the limit.

Pourquoimoi Wed 16-Jan-13 22:50:47

He won't get caught again if he doesn't break the law again will he??
Simple. (Can't pretend I never do it though blush)

YANBU.

merrymouse Wed 16-Jan-13 22:52:02

Am I right in thinking that the op's DH would currently be facing 12 points if he hadn't gone on the speeding course?

EuroShagmore Wed 16-Jan-13 22:57:21

I wouldn't take the points, ever (I work in a profession where a dishonesty offence could see me struck off, in any event).

Most satnavs tell you the speed limit on the road and show you your speed. many also show the position of fixed speed cameras (but not the radar traps of course). With mileage your husband is doing, I'd be surprised if he were not already using a satnav. If not, get him a TomTom.

Points stay on your license for 4 years minimum you only get banned if you accumulate 12 points in any 3 year period.

bureni Wed 16-Jan-13 23:00:27

Get him a pair of glasses as well, he might be able to see the traffic signs and the speedo at the same time.

FudgeyCookie Wed 16-Jan-13 23:04:38

I wouldn't even contemplate it to be quite honest. Why would you if you have a clean license?! It's your H fault that he has those points on his license, his fault he was speeding, his fault he got caught speeding AGAIN. No one is forcing him to speed ffs.

Wrt raising the speed limit on motorways - we use the M5 quite often and already see loads of drivers speeding, the limit is there for a reason. I'd be worried that raising it would make those idiots think they are still too big for the law, and again going over the limit. Say, raised to 80mph = some driving at 90-100mph.

SoftKittyWarmKitty Wed 16-Jan-13 23:13:35

Oh no, I've missed a now-deleted response aimed at me. Clearly I'm not as fast as the OP's DH.

It seems you don't agree with me wanting him off the road, OP. Well if he doesn't speed, he won't get banned, will he? Speeding drivers, drunk drivers and their ilk are a risk to us all - including you and your DC/family. Read the horrific stories on the other thread I linked to, then try telling me that it's acceptable for drivers to speed.

Sallyingforth Wed 16-Jan-13 23:42:18

hmc's DH
You're a bloody coward aren't you.
You hide behind your wife when you've broken the law and expect her to perjure herself for you.
And then use her name to insult people giving her advice.
You have no respect for her at all.
What a weak, feeble excuse for a man.

flow4 Wed 16-Jan-13 23:58:31

Get him to swap his car for a Suzuki Carry!grin

ComposHat Belgium Thu 17-Jan-13 00:04:03

nine points so he has been caught driving like a knob on three occasions. if he job was that important he wouldn't be drivingl
likeeley a grade a twonk.

It isn't inevitable he will get caught again if he isn't so arrogant to treat the roads and DIDN'T SPEED. he won't get anymore points.

ABreakFromTheNorm Thu 17-Jan-13 00:07:31

I would. Not for this example as he's not learnt his lesson and no job at risk etc however if getting points meant dp would lose his job I'd do it.

StuntGirl Thu 17-Jan-13 00:23:22

I wouldn't dream of it, and I'd be appalled that my partner would think he could ask.

I too hope your partner gets banned from driving tbh, he is clearly not safe to be on the roads.

sashh Thu 17-Jan-13 01:32:42

I'm actually suprised he is still employed with a record like that. Or has he not informed his employer? If so he is also driving without insurance.

OP your dh is knob.

OP's dh you are knob. You need to learn to drive within the law.

There will be a photo. There will also be a record of your 4 offences and your wife's 0, and I know the police can be a bit thick at times but not that thick.

You are risking both your liberty and that of your wife. How are you going to look after your children if you are both in prison?

My DH wouldn't even ask me to do this. HIBU and needs to concentrate on not speeding in the first place.

He has driven regularly for work over the last few years and has 0 points so no it's not "inevitable" he will get caught again as he claims. That kind of attitude is the reason for his points!

My dh has driven regularly I mean. <tired>

Tortoiseonthehalfshell Thu 17-Jan-13 01:50:20

It's not just 'inevitable' he will get caught again - he thinks he's likely to get caught again BEFORE MARCH. Because if I'm understanding this, he's not going to go to 12 points this time, and in March 3 drop off anyway - so his only risk is that he takes these three and then speeds again in the next two months. Two months!

JoanByers Thu 17-Jan-13 03:21:24

While i can see some sense in taking the 3 points if he was going to go onto 12, to risk going to prison to keep him on 6, rather than 9, points, is stupid.

what the actual fuck?? angry

your dh is a first class twat! congratulations! you must be so proud hmm

speeding kills... he doesnt deserve his licence... personally i hope he get caught and is either banned or sent to jail though both would be good imo

ffs does he actually have any brains in his head? or just in his trousers?

twoyearsandcounting Thu 17-Jan-13 06:53:19

he argues he will be caught again

The man is totally unrepentant and hasn't learnt his lesson. He is a dangerous driver w admits he will do it again .

Good for you refusing to take the points. If he can't drive safely then he should be punished.

MumVsKids Thu 17-Jan-13 07:05:54

So he knows he will be caught again?

YADNBU for refusing to take the points. I've happily paid a speeding fine for DH before now, but refused to take points for him. My licence is clean, I intend to keep it that way though I admit this is more through luck than anything else

AltinkumATEalltheTurkey Thu 17-Jan-13 07:10:56

I wouldnt either, your just bailing him out, and as he says, he knows it will happen again, well if that's the case will you bail him out the next time?

He needs to take control of his actions and be a bloody man with it !!

EmmaBemma Thu 17-Jan-13 07:14:09

It sounds like the sooner he is off the road, the better.

Morloth Thu 17-Jan-13 07:55:09

I would have thought the point of 'points' was to allow for a couple of mistakes here and there.

Tell him to man up and stop fucking speeding, it isn't that hard.

diddl Germany Thu 17-Jan-13 08:04:55

Oh dear, he´s just one of those victims of circumstance, isn´t he that takes no fucking responsibility & thinks that it´s all someone elses fault.

TBH I´d LTB as I´d have no respect for him anymore.

hackmum Thu 17-Jan-13 08:07:51

I thought the Chris Huhne and Vicky Pryce trial was about to start this week for exactly this offence - I don't know what's happened to it, but it's a shame, as it might have given your DH pause for thought.

In your position, I wouldn't do it, and in your DH's position, I wouldn't even ask. I agree it's tough if he risks losing his job but he will just have to try and drive within the speed limits.

Bear in mind that they can check against information from cameras who was driving the car if they choose to investigate.

TurnipCake Thu 17-Jan-13 08:11:52

My ex wanted me to take the blame for him driving like a twat in my car. I refused. He wanted evidence it was him driving (apparently it could have been the faeries or Bin Laden as far as he was concerned) and the police sent a nice photograph of his mug that had been taken from the front. Just as well, then.

LIZS Thu 17-Jan-13 08:15:53

He doesn't lose his job - he is just fearful that further speeding offences may occur within the next 3-4 years putting him at 12
Then he needs to be more speed aware and not do it , especially if his job may be at stake, not ask you to take the rap.

BlueyDragon Thu 17-Jan-13 08:21:10

Dear hmc's H,

It's illegal to ask hmc or anyone else to do this. If you're worried about losing your licence, don't speed. If you're worried about being late, leave earlier. Welcome to the world where if you don't comply with the law there are consequences.

Bluey

SolomanDaisy Thu 17-Jan-13 08:21:30

Bloody hell, I don't know which I'm more outraged by: the OP's DH who wants her to take his points so he doesn't have to stop speeding or the poster who is happy for her husband to speed because he's 'a bit dozy in the mornings' and 'speed doesn't kill'. Twats.

DoodlesNoodles Thu 17-Jan-13 08:25:19

I wouldn't do it. I would be sympathetic a bit but I wouldn't want to risk being done for lying about it.

I think it is easy to speed. I was caught doing 36 in a 30 area and I got to do the speed awareness course. I try so hard not to speed now but every so often I do.

He doesn't think he will be offered a bad driver school because he has done one in the past year

Oh the Irony!

Why is he so certain he is going to incur further points this year. Why can't he do what the vast majority do? If his job involves driving why the hell would you even risk it??

YANBU.

DeepRedBetty Thu 17-Jan-13 08:32:08

Have done a quick poll of 16 drivers I know well enough to ask about points and trust enough to get an honest reply. We're all forty/fifty-something now, most of us have been driving 20+ years. Only two of us have had speeding points, and both of them only once. So bollocks whoever said 'most people have picked up three points at some point in their driving careers' somewhere up-thread.

shelscrape Thu 17-Jan-13 08:38:11

Well, OP you summed up the legal basics in your first post. if you take the points for him your are committing the offence and he is also committing the offence by asking you to do it. it is doing an act tending to pervert the course of public justice, liklihood of a custodial term for both of you is pretty high.

Your DH is being an arse, other's may do it but it doesn't make it right. A driving licence is a privilege not a right.

If your DH would be at the 12 point limit he can admit the offence, attend at Court are make a submission to the Magistrates that he would be caused undue hardship if disqualified - that could result in no disqualification or a lesser period of disqualification, BUT he could only use the loss of livlihood argument once in a period of 3 years .... so real last chance stuff. He just needs to suck it up and face the music. His mistake, his consquences. don't get sucked into this mess.

Before I left the UK I worked in criminal law and have seen people prosecuted and convicted in just these type of circumstances.

Snorbs Thu 17-Jan-13 08:46:30

To be fair, speed by itself doesn't kill. Jet airliners fly a lot faster than cars drive but have a much better safety record.

Inappropriate speed combined with lack of awareness of what's around you and poor observation - that kills.

Given that the OP's myopic pillock of an H has been caught speeding four times already (thanks for the correction ShellyBoobs), his observation skills are clearly woefully lacking and he's obviously completely unaware of what's going on around him.

OP's H, you're not just a selfish, self-entitled twunt for trying to guilt-trip your wife into taking on the points you earned, you're also crap at driving. You want to try learning some situational awareness skills.

MarinaIvy Thu 17-Jan-13 09:11:33

I think we lost HRC. Frankly, I wonder how long we had her.

Adversecamber Thu 17-Jan-13 09:30:38

Do not take the points
He sounds like an awful driver
I actually hate the everyone speeds excuse, have I ever gone over the speed limit, I cannot say I have never gone over but it is rare and not in a built up area.

My dad has been driving, including buses (especially the old double deckers with the crash gear boxes), for about 50 years. He has never had any points on his licence.

DP has been driving for more than 30 years - no points ever.

Me - about 20 years - no points ever. And I would never take points for someone else. Their points, their problem.

TricksyLaBOOshh Thu 17-Jan-13 09:58:04

I'm amazed at how many people are giving the OP a hard time about this actually.

Her dh drives 40k miles a year - I would take about five years to rack up that sort of mileage, and I have definitely (inadvertently) gone over the speed limit, at the very least, once a year. All it takes is a fussy child in the back, keeping with the flow of traffic etc, to distract you and before you know it you are few miles an hour above the limit. It's just luck I've never been caught, even though I try my hardest to be a good driver.

Those who are being so sanctimonious must be watching their speedo like a hawk (and not watching the road), and I'm struggling to believe that they have never exceeded a speed limit.

To the poster who's dh says driving excessive distances makes someone a better driver, I would argue that there is also the possibility that they would be more complacent (familiarity breeds contempt).

exexpat Thu 17-Jan-13 10:06:41

I think most people have probably exceeded the speed limit, deliberately or accidentally, at one time or another. I know I have occasionally, though I have never had a speeding fine or points. The thing is, it is not as if you get caught every time you do it, or even one time in ten. Maybe one time in a hundred, or even less than that?

Which means that for every time the OP's husband has been caught speeding, I would guess, he will have exceeded the speed limit many, many times, unless he is spectacularly unlucky, or stupid enough only to speed in areas with working speed cameras. It sounds like he just doesn't think that speed limits apply to him.

SilverAndSparklyKat Thu 17-Jan-13 10:08:35

You can go online and view your speeding offence. I accidentally went at 35 in a 30 whilst lost in a strange town on a dual carriageway (very confusing roads in Stevanage!). When I went online they a crystal clear picture of me ranting and dh looking contrite as we were exceptionally late for a christening due to his bad directions.
I doubt they'd have believed me if I said dh was driving!

OP have only read up to your post on the first page where you say he already has 9 points - and I am so angry for you! He is being a complete arsehole about this. And his argument that he does 40,000 a year so will be caught again makes no sense - if he doesn't speed, he won't get caught! How much dangerous driving and points on his licence will it take for him to grow the fuck up and stop driving dangerously?

Refuse to lie for him, sit back and make him realise that if he doesn't stop speeding, he will lose his licence next time. What an absolute wanker he sounds - sorry but he does sad

BigStickBIWI Thu 17-Jan-13 10:17:45

The thing is, if you're driving that number of miles in a day/week/month/year, because it's imperative for your job then you have to drive with awareness such that you don't exceed the speed limit.

I'm not getting why that seems so difficult to grasp.

More time on the road = more opportunities to be caught

But also:

More time on the road = more time to develop your driving skills

... and it seems that the OP's (D)P doesn't believe that the second one of these applies to him

FloweryDrawers Thu 17-Jan-13 10:27:34

Tricksy - are you saying you think it isn't possible to keep an eye on your speedometer to avoid speeding AND watch the road at the same time?

Because if you are, you either need to start a campaign alerting the world to the danger of speedometers, or brush up on your own driving skills.

This thread is really winding me up. Anybody who isn't capable of safely controlling a car whilst occasionally glancing at the speedometer shouldn't be driving at all angry angry angry

There is no excuse for speeding FFS.

Your DH speeds routinely and as pointed out above you don't get caught everytime you speed I suspect your odds of getting caught for any single incident of speeding are very low indeed.

Your DH has been caught 4 times in 3 years so that is one speeding ticket for every 30,000 miles driven.

My DH drives about 12K per year by car (he was a bus driver for a number of years but I am yet to hear of a double decker in central London being done for speeding so I am ignoring that milage). Since I have known him he has had one speeding ticket. So one ticket in 16 years. That is one ticket in 192,000 miles driven by car. I drive less and have never had a ticket.

Lets compare
OP's DH - one ticket per 30,000 miles driven
My DH - one ticket per 192,000 miles driven

flowery Thu 17-Jan-13 10:35:54

Going at 36 in a 30 zone is surely way more dangerous than going 79 on the dual carriageway? Far more likely to be children running around and it's well publicised the difference those extra mph make when someone is hit.

People don't run around on motorways generally, so up to 80 is usually safe. On motorways its idiotic driving that kills, not 80mph. Imo speaking as someone who has been known to go 80mph on motorways when conditions are safe

On that basis I would ordinarily have much sympathy with anyone caught at 79mph.

However I have no sympathy for someone caught at 79mph who already has 6 points on their licence and therefore if they had any sense would be being ultra cautious. And even less sympathy for someone who has a cruise control facility on his speedo meaning there is absolutely no excuse whatsoever. And even less sympathy for someone who asks his wife to break the law and take his points.

I agree BigStick. Plus when you are driving for a job you get to know your way around, you learn the route and the speed limits and where the speed cameras are at least

WhoWhatWhereWhen Thu 17-Jan-13 10:43:49

I have a guaranteed method of never getting any points, It's worked for me for years AND there is nothing the courts or Police can do to stop me getting away with it, everyone who drives for a living should know about this trick.

You know what it is though, I DON'T BREAK THE SPEED LIMIT.....dont tell anyone

Tell him to stop fucking speeding! Selfish arse that he is. Yanbu at all in anyway shape or form op.

TricksyLaBOOshh Thu 17-Jan-13 10:48:26

No, flowery, that's not the point I was trying to make. I'm saying its very easy to take your eye off the ball for a minute, and before you know it you are above the limit. People are being very black-and-white about this subject.

And FWIW, I don't think that the op should take her dhs points, he needs to drive more responsibly in future or change jobs.

GrimmaTheNome Thu 17-Jan-13 10:51:27

Don't forget that if you're caught doing 79 your speedo will have been registering higher - anything up to 10%. They never read low.

Tricksy - of course you don't have to watch your speedo 'like a hawk.'hmm You just glance at it occasionally and remain aware of your engine noise. If there are distractions then you should slow down - the speed limit is an upper limit, not a target which must be reached.

flowery Thu 17-Jan-13 10:54:02

confused

What's not the point you are trying to make Tricksy? I wasn't responding to anyone in particular with my post.

Crinkle77 Thu 17-Jan-13 10:55:58

It might also depend if the speed camera caught a photo of who was driving. Not sure if they would check but it is a consideration

TricksyLaBOOshh Thu 17-Jan-13 10:58:36

I was responding to FloweryDrawers, unfortunate x post I think!

StuntGirl Thu 17-Jan-13 10:59:54

I am quite capable of checking the speedometer while driving safely. In the same way I can check blind spots, watch the road ahead, be aware of the cars behind me and read road signs while driving safely.

charitymum Thu 17-Jan-13 11:07:31

It's not just about the law. Speeding kills people. If he speeds he needs a wake up call before he kills you or your DC or my DC.

Not being judgemental-everyone can
make mistakes- but regular disregard for speed limits creates culture that speeding ok and then kids die (and actually 36 in a 30 will kill more children than 79 on 70)

YANBU

FairPhyllis Thu 17-Jan-13 11:14:24

OP's DH, do you really think the police aren't wise to this sort of scam?

You sound like a selfish, inconsiderate knob who thinks he is above the law.

If you and OP end up with custodial sentences for attempting to pervert the course of justice, it will be a damn sight more inconvenient for your family than you potentially losing your licence.

Dahlen Thu 17-Jan-13 11:17:54

I am not a slow driver. I like to put my foot down TBH. I also like having a clean licence and have managed to drive for 20 years without ever accumulating any points. Your DH needs to face the consequences of his actions and learn some self-control. Asking you to take his points is clear evidence of the fact that he's nowhere near that point yet. All that will happen is that he'll get your licence clogged up with points too, and probably still lose his own in the near future anyway. YANBU.

ChaoticintheNewYear Thu 17-Jan-13 11:35:13

OP's H you need to grow up and start taking responsibility for your actions. This includes taking these points and making sure you learn to drive within the speed limits in future, something you don't seem capable of atm.

allgoingtoshitnow Thu 17-Jan-13 14:52:11

Of course you should take the points OP (assuming you were also in the car at the time and could argue confusion over who was driving if the police query it?).

If its a choice between your DH putting food on the table or not then its in the best interests of your family. He may not get banned this time but one more fine and hes lost his job. Is that a risk you are willing to take?

40k per year of job based driving is a world away from the holier-than-thou drivers tootling between home, nursery and coffee morning each day, who are probably on the road for 10% of the time that your DH is. IME such posters only view speed cameras as fair right until they get that first ticket. Then you cant shut them up over the injustice of it all.

Half the speed cameras are just there to generate money anyway. 87 on a countryside dual carriageway (?) is a little fast but not life threatening. Its not like it was 87 past a school. You just have to weigh up the risk of getting caught out in a lie though. And unless you are an MP I doubt you will end up in prison...

bureni Thu 17-Jan-13 15:00:33

No way should the OP take the points as she would be convicted for perverting the course of justice which could see a prison sentence, the police know who was driving the car already through the video evidence.

specialsubject Thu 17-Jan-13 15:05:10

TricksyLaBOOsh - bollocks. 'keeping up with the flow of traffic' does not mean speeding. If the child is distracting, pull over. you are a CRAP driver if you believe this.

all of you who think speeding is ok can piss off to your own desert island.

my DH has just come home. I am very lucky because he was on the receiving end of someone like you.

PatriciaHolm Thu 17-Jan-13 15:44:38

87 on a countryside dual carriageway (?) is a little fast but not life threatening

You're joking, right? More people get killed on non-motorway non-built-up roads (countryside dual carriageways essentially) than on motorways or in built up areas. 87 on a countryside dual carriageway is insane. (Thought the OP's H was doing 79 I think, still too much).

And they won't be able to "argue confusion over who was driving if the police query it?" with a photo.

ffs angry

those of you saying that its ok because its not near a school/village/town etc, are you flipping stupid or something?

there will be other car drivers on the road... some with families with them!! its very easy to lose control of a car, especially when its this cold outside and there's likely to be ice and/or snow.

also what would happen if someone else was to lose control of their car? it takes longer to stop when you're speeding!

jesus i honestly cant believe some of the posts on this thread

Sorry but I agree with allgoingtoshitnow.
If it means he can carry on working and earning the money then, if it was me, I'd take the points.
Many many people do this every day.
I'm very pleased there are soooo many drivers on MN that are angels in their cars and never ever exceed speed limits. Well done to you all!

Psst, HMC's DH, there's a trick to avoiding getting caught by the speed cameras, simple but always works. Are you listening?



Lean in closer...



Closer....



Bit closer so I can whisper to you, don't want everyone catching on to this trick...



IT'S CALLED DRIVING THE SPEED LIMIT YOU TWAT!

"I'm very pleased there are soooo many drivers on MN that are angels in their cars and never ever exceed speed limits. Well done to you all!"

hmm Seriously?! You know it isn't difficult to drive the speed limit don't you? Is there a magnet attached to the bottom of your foot that means you can't help pressing the accelerator?

It's not being angelic. It's being sensible and actually giving a fuck about not hurting/killing others.

Ra88 Thu 17-Jan-13 16:02:10

I have taken 3 for my dp ! Then again he did get 6 because I forgot the car insurance ran out 2 days before and he drove the car.. hmm

andapartridgeinaRowantree Thu 17-Jan-13 16:02:15

I know ppl who were prosecuted. So no ynbu

allgoingtoshit

I specifically posted about my DH who did 12K pa on top of driving a bus for 8+ hours a day. He drove with work and home driving 60 hrs + a week for years and managed 1 speeding ticket in 16 years.

Are you the OP's DH under your own log in now? Your post sounds very entitled and arrogant.

40k per year of job based driving is a world away from the holier-than-thou drivers tootling between home, nursery and coffee morning each day, who are probably on the road for 10% of the time that your DH is.

and more than a tad misogynistic

I was knocked off my bike on Saturday by a driver who was not paying attention. She was an idiot and I told her so. But fortunately other than shock and some bruising and damage to my bike and clothes which she said she would pay for, I was and am ok.

If she had been speeding, I would probably be dead.

OP - stand your ground, and tell your DH to pay more attention.

lottiegarbanzo Thu 17-Jan-13 16:21:56

No allgoingtoshitnow the question is, is that a risk you are willing to take.

lottiegarbanzo Thu 17-Jan-13 16:26:41

Btw, DP has driven all over the country for work for years. This situation just hasn't arisen and he has no points. That's because he's an adult who takes responsibility for his own actions.

"40k per year of job based driving is a world away from the holier-than-thou drivers tootling between home, nursery and coffee morning each day, who are probably on the road for 10% of the time that your DH is"

So does this mean you think the more you earn and the more the drive the faster you can drive? You know it's not a computer game right? You don't earn "speed boosts"...

Twattybollocks Thu 17-Jan-13 16:37:34

Sorry but if you are driving safely within the speed limit it makes no difference whether you drive 10k per year to and from school or 40k per year for work, you will not be caught for speeding. Doing lots of miles for work does not entitle you to exceed the speed limit and put other peoples lives at risk.

TooImmatureMincePies Thu 17-Jan-13 16:42:20

Oh honestly. If you do the crime you do the time. At one point DH had, I think 11 points. 5 for speeding on a dual carriageway (the local police were having a crack-down on speeders, hence 5 at once), 3 for parking on zig zags outside Dominos while he ran in to get a pre-ordered pizza, and 3 because he answered his phone while driving. Yes, he was extremely pissed off when it happened, but he accepted that it was his fault. He took the risk, so he took the consequences. Nobody made my DH decide to answer his phone/park illegally/speed. Nobody made your DH speed either. He did that himself.

Well I don't consider myself inconsiderate but yes, I have hit 75 on a motorway at times and oopppsss.... I have looked down and I'm doing 32 or 33 in a 30 limit.
None of us are perfect!
http://shareranks.com/1454,Top-Ways-Many-People-Break-the-Law

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/law-and-order/3044794/How-we-all-break-the-law-every-day.html

babadeems Thu 17-Jan-13 16:58:35

Urgh, really gives me the rage when other drivers argue "well you can't keep to the speed limit all the time", "sometimes you don't realise you're going over" etc etc etc. FIL even comes out with "they can do you for going too slow too you know so it's not easy". No police officer in existence would 'do you' for going 25 in a 30 zone or 50 in a 60 zone so just go slower, it's not f*cking hard! Then if you do accidentally stray higher before you notice you've got a few miles in hand before you hit the limit.

An accident is dropping your keys on the floor when you lock the car - going over the speed limit so often that you get caught repeatedly is not an accident, it's a glaring sign that you're a self-entitled twat who shouldn't be allowed to control a vehicle designed for responsible adults.

I've done 1 of those 20, and I can live with that because it's one that doesn't risk causing physical harm to others. You've got to be really fucking inconsiderate to do one of these;
1. Speeding
2. Talking on a mobile/texting while driving
16. Driving through a red light

Because they could all result in the death of someone.

lottiegarbanzo Thu 17-Jan-13 17:00:09

Honestly OP's DH, your anger sounds like fear. Fear that you are not in control of your own destiny. Fear because you see speeding as something that happens to you, that could strike at any time. You have no confidence in your own ability to control your speed, so take charge of your destiny. You are reaching out for the nearest dependable person in helpless panic, hoping she can take your fear away and tell you it's all going to be ok, like a soothing mother.

Have you considered advanced driving lessons?

Mayanbob Thu 17-Jan-13 17:08:57

The sentence for perverting the course of justice ' should be custody unless unjust to do so'

If OP takes points, and her DH is in the know (as obviously he is) then they would BOTH be charged with PCJ. Both potentially face a prison sentence- and who would care for any DC then?

Hope this puts into perspective the 'logic' behind what is being suggested here. Poor OP but at least you seem sensible

HoneyDragon Thu 17-Jan-13 17:18:31

As I said earlier. Dh is this households sole earner. He drives s thousand miles a week. If he loses his job we don't earn. If he loses his job over 80 other people would end up unemployed too.

He doesn't speed of drive like a dickhead because he is a responsible grown adult who would not jeapordise ANYBODY else's livelihood or life.

HMC I hope your dh was panicking when he suggested it. He put you in a shitty position which you don't deserve.

Posterofapombear Thu 17-Jan-13 17:19:50

I routinely drove 500 miles a day with young offenders in my car for 7 years.

No speeding tickets.

There is no excuse for driving like a twat.

Snorbs Thu 17-Jan-13 17:51:54

I used to routinely do 30-35k a year. The only tickets I got were a couple of car park fines for over-staying what I'd paid for.

I did get done for speeding on my motorbike when I was young and very stupid. I took it on the chin, learned from my mistakes and wouldn't have dreamt of trying to off-load the points onto someone else.

I mean, how much of a cunt do you have to be to get caught doing something stupid and then try to land someone else in it?

amicissimma England Thu 17-Jan-13 18:08:18

"Bloody hell, I don't know which I'm more outraged by: the OP's DH who wants her to take his points so he doesn't have to stop speeding or the poster who is happy for her husband to speed because he's 'a bit dozy in the mornings' and 'speed doesn't kill'. Twats. "

And what about the people who think that the reason they were caught speeding was that the camera was in an 'unfair' position?

Tip to anyone getting distracted, lost, etc: lift the right foot slightly.

Sallyingforth Thu 17-Jan-13 19:34:14

I mean, how much of a cunt do you have to be to get caught doing something stupid and then try to land someone else in it?

Ask the OP. She lives with one.

allgoingtoshitnow Thu 17-Jan-13 19:41:24

How is taking 3 points for your DH because you have none, theres hardly any risk (it happens all the time) and he will lose his job if you dont 'landing someone in it'?

Its pretty simple. Take the points or dont fucking eat.

Anyone else think MurderOfGoths should shop herself for that time she did 34 in a 30 zone? I've no idea how she lives with that on her conscience.

GregBishopsBottomBitch Thu 17-Jan-13 19:46:23

He shouldnt have been speeding, nor learned his lesson, tell him to fuck off.

minibmw2010 Thu 17-Jan-13 20:04:23

What would he do if you take the points and the Police then say 'well actually that's all a bit strange because we can clearly see a male behind the wheel'. It is possible you know !!!

If the police are willing to prosecute an MP and his ex-wife for doing exactly this, then believe me they'll do it to you both as well.

"Anyone else think MurderOfGoths should shop herself for that time she did 34 in a 30 zone?"

Hahaha. Good thing I've never done it really. Is it truly than unbelievable to you that someone is able to drive without going over the speed limit? It's not exactly difficult to do!

"How is taking 3 points for your DH because you have none, theres hardly any risk (it happens all the time) and he will lose his job if you dont 'landing someone in it'?"

Well quite, everyone knows that getting caught perverting the course of justice has no consequences whatsoever, in fact you win a prize for it!

Autumnchill Thu 17-Jan-13 20:21:35

I deal with speeding tickets as part of my job and so I can not emphasis strongly enough the fact that you must not take these points however much he sulks.

He will have to basically learn to stick to the speed limit.

exexpat Thu 17-Jan-13 20:38:06

allgoingtoshitnow aka hmc's DH, I suspect - the OP said in one of her earlier posts that these points weren't enough to make you her DH lose his licence, and therefore presumably lose your his job. If you they persist with the illegal plan of getting her to take the points, they could both end up with a criminal record, and possibly a jail sentence, which I can't imagine would do either of their careers or their family life any good.

I would hope that you the OP's DH will see this as a final warning and start to slow down a bit rather than getting his knickers in a twist and swearing at people when everyone on the internet says he is an idiot .

Veritate Thu 17-Jan-13 20:43:23

"Its pretty simple. Take the points or dont fucking eat."

But that isn't the issue here. He won't lose his job for this. He will only lose his job if he is stupid enough to speed or commit another driving offence between now and March, when three of his current points come off the licence. The choice is entirely in his hands. It is utterly stupid to assume you won't be found out - the police do check the photos, particularly for people like this who already have a lot of points on their licence who may be more tempted to lie. If or when he is found out, he will certainly lose his job and have massive difficulty in finding another because he will have a record for dishonesty - and so will OP.

"Its pretty simple. Take the points or dont fucking eat"

2 things.

1 - It's pretty simple. RTFT.
2 - Why should the OP be punished for something that isn't her fault?!

pointythings Netherlands Thu 17-Jan-13 20:53:45

allgoingtoshit I used to drive 30k miles a year - did it for almost 9 years, in fact. I have never had points on my license.

Also, depending on the car, if the OP's H was clocked at 79mph, then the speedo must have been showing more, and in the cases of some cars, a lot more. If you're inattentive enough not to notice that your speedometer is (probably) showing you going at 80+ mph, then you should not be on the road at all.

lottiegarbanzo Thu 17-Jan-13 20:59:53

allgoingtoshitnow for someone doing an otherwise excellent impression of OP's DH, you don't seem to have grasped the basic elements of the story. He will only reach 12 points if he is caught speeding again before the end of March. Really interesting that you regard that as utterly inevitable.

(What would this bloke do without a wife he assumes he can browbeat into lying for him? Hmm. Not eat all by himself presumably. Pretty sad.)

And, calm down dear! (it might never happen, eh?)

hatgirl Thu 17-Jan-13 21:21:12

I do 40k+ miles a year and have been driving for 10 years and have never had any points. Your H sounds like one of those people who drive a big Audi/BMW and just can't bear to be stuck behind someone like me who is sticking to the speed limit. Any of those points for being on his phone whilst driving by any chance?

My job and my professional status mean I have to keep a clean license. Therefore I don't speed, drink and drive, run red lights or take deliberate risks when I am driving. It really is that simple and your H as a grown man with responsibilities needs to realise that.

cumfy Thu 17-Jan-13 23:02:38

Dear hmc's DH,

You really are a fucking twat aren't you ?

Well think about it ....

See ? smile

Regards cumfy

ICBINEG Fri 18-Jan-13 01:03:21

wow!

I am actually more pissed with the dozy driver doing 36 in the 30 than the 79 in a 70. But if you break the limit you have to take the consequences yourself...obvs the OP should not take the points.

The DH should try driving well for the 3 months he needs to not be speeding. Who knows, he might even like it!

Morloth Fri 18-Jan-13 07:13:31

It just isn't that hard. No divine abilities needed.

If it is so hard for you to maintain a steady speed, then perhaps you shouldn't be driving.

If he cared about his family more he would be making sure he didn't lose his job because he can't control his vehicle.

Once again, it really isn't that difficult.

BlueyDragon Fri 18-Jan-13 08:21:50

I can't believe anyone would suggest that law breaking is acceptable just because it happens frequently. How on earth does that make it the right thing to do? People frequently lie to insurance companies (fraud), shoplift (theft), ride bikes without lights, speed, commit benefit fraud, take illegal drugs - should all of these be acceptable because they happen often? Er, no. Because they increase costs to consumers who are honest or put people at risk or fuel organised crime, which costs us all - the estimated £2billion profits from organised crime have an even worse tax payout than some big corporations I could mention and get people killed into the bargain. "Small" crimes are as important as big ones and I can't believe anyone would suggest that committing one is OK.

I appreciate many people speed occasionally but if you get caught, be man enough to take the consequences and then if you are worried about losing your licence, don't do it again. Then you won't lose your job. Easy when you think about it, isn't it, and no-one need risk anything at all.

Plomino Fri 18-Jan-13 09:46:24

Jesus . I drive 800 miles a week minimum . Every week . Then when I get to work , I get in the job car , and drive that through London traffic , quite a lot of the time on blue light runs . Have done this for nearly 20 years . So far , in that time , I have had one speeding fine , for 37 in a 30 . But then if I get more than 6 points on my licence , I can't drive for work .

Quite apart from the fact that perverting the course of justice is a criminal offence , if the OP gets found out ( and please realise that the camera partnership take more than one photo , specifically to identify the driver ) , the insurance company will find out too . Then the OP will find it damn near impossible to get insured on her own car . Ever , because she'll be flagged up as a fraudulent driver .

Is it really worth it ? So that the DH can continue to speed with impunity and sheer fucking arrogance ?

Where is the op?

allgoingtoshitnow Fri 18-Jan-13 10:51:13

"Hahaha. Good thing I've never done it really."

Bullshit. There isn't a driver in this country whos never broken the speed limit because half the time the limit isn't signposted clearly. Plenty of sanctimonious posters who haven't been caught for it though as this thread shows. Their day will come and I know they are so utterly honest that they will return here, reopen this thread and confess their sins when it happens.

"Where is the op? "

Probably out with her DH seeing if the camera is forward or backwards facing. People rarely get caught but it pays to be safe.

Speed cameras are a complete scam. Thankfully they are slowly being removed.

"Bullshit. There isn't a driver in this country whos never broken the speed limit because half the time the limit isn't signposted clearly."

Just because you can't resist going over the speed limit doesn't mean everyone else is the same. And even if roads aren't signposted it's usually pretty easy to tell what the limit is, just by comparing it to other roads where you do know the limit. And if you really don't know then you err on the side of caution and drive the lower end of the speed scale.

ICBINEG Fri 18-Jan-13 10:57:16

hmm my DF revisited the scene of a ticket recently because he was thought there was likely insufficient indication of the limit (was doing 70 in a 50 on what you would assume was national limit dual carriage way). When he came back he held his hands up and admitted that he couldn't have been paying enough attention because the limit signs were very clear.

I haven't had points on my licence in 15 years of driving. Yes, I have drifted over limits...and every time it happens I curse myself and tell myself to be more careful in future. If I got a ticket I would accept it no complaint.

QOD Fri 18-Jan-13 10:57:31

I took some for dh many many many moons ago. Wouldn't now!!
Naturally I earned some of my own immediately after I lost his off my license

Grrr

Veritate Fri 18-Jan-13 11:04:28

"People rarely get caught"
Don't deceive yourself. They do. Especially people like op's dh - the system flags up those who already have points on their licence precisely because they're the ones most likely to come up with damn stupid ideas like this.

allgoingtoshitnow Fri 18-Jan-13 11:04:48

Come on MurderOfGoths - ICBINEG has confessed. Its very easy, just stand up and say 'My name is MurderOfGoths, and I'm a speeder'.

Then we can start working on your road-captain issues.

Why would I lie? Just to make you feel better?

If it helps, my dad is a driving instructor. Not only was a brought up by him to obey the rules of the world, I also saw him in a neck brace when some fuckwit who couldn't bear to do the speed limit got impatient when they had to share the road with a learner.

Aside from being a driving instructor, by dad has also driven buses, coaches, limousines, lorries, pretty much any road vehicle. So I've also been taught that being stupid enough to get points on the license can mean losing all income.

I know the importance of not speeding.

Also saw multiple people knocked down outside my school as it was a favourite road for speeding on. It happened at least once a month.

So do I speed? No, never. It's been shown to be stupid in so many ways that I cannot see why you would.

I get that you feel guilty and want to assuage your guilt by convincing yourself that everyone does it. But they don't. So either accept the guilt, or assuage it by not speeding anymore.

ICBINEG Fri 18-Jan-13 12:27:39

I wasn't confessing to being a speeder...I was confessing to being a bad driver. I never deliberately go over the limit. But I have been know to glance at speedo and notice I am a couple of MPH over. This is bad driving as you should always be aware of your speed.

So which are you all? A bad driver or a deliberately bad driver?

btw I completely believe that someone trained to a more advanced level than myself could drive without breaking the limits!

Pigsmummy Fri 18-Jan-13 16:44:56

I would take the points, flame me all you like

Pigsmummy Fri 18-Jan-13 16:49:27

I used to do 60,000 miles a year and clocked up points, don't judge me unless you want the long version of this tale.... I did advance driving and the police run speeders course and haven't looked back, they do make you a better driver. If my hubby needed me to take a fine then I would, it takes a major court case for the photograph to be scrutinised (accident with injury for example) so I would just fill in the back of the ticket without dispute and send it back. Then get hubby to buy me dinner.

lockets Fri 18-Jan-13 16:51:17

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TwoFacedCows Fri 18-Jan-13 17:06:28

WOW!! i regularly drive at 85mph on the motor way and most dual carriage ways. Some are busier then others and i will slow down to 75/80. But on the motorway i am nearly always driving at 85mph and sometimes more! i looked down at the speedometer and i was doing 98mph! ophs!

I think if I was in a car travelling at 98mph I would literally shit myself. I am not fond of speed.

TwoFacedCows Fri 18-Jan-13 17:35:55

i LOVE speed, but yes it was a tad too fast for me as well.

CrapBag Fri 18-Jan-13 17:39:33

As it is clearly a regular occurance I would make him take it. He really isn't learning is he!!

I fucked up big time recently. First time ever in trouble. I was being genuine and not believed in court. They came down on me hard. I have learned my lesson from it though.

specialsubject Fri 18-Jan-13 17:44:34

TwoFacedCows - apart from the fact that you are apparently above the law, where do you get your cheap petrol? You are using vast amounts more than needed because you go so fast.

so you are the definition of more money than sense.

OP - let him take the rap. The life you save could be yours.

TwoFacedCows Fri 18-Jan-13 17:51:25

I have a petrol card, paid for by work smile

So no i dont think i am.

nkf Fri 18-Jan-13 17:55:58

This thread is an eye opener. I had no idea it was possible to do this. I had no idea that anyone did it. Why would you? Just why? If you keep getting speeding tickets, you're driving too fast too often. And 36 instead of 30 is much more worrying than 70 on a dual carriageway. 30 is built up area/residential and that means people. This man thinks he will get more tickets. Think it's inevitable. He needs to be off the road. They should drop the upper limit to six.

nkf Fri 18-Jan-13 18:00:09

Buy you dinner? That'll do it. Sure. I've never eaten dinner before. What's it like?

If you are breaking the law while driving doesn't it tend to invalidate your insurance?

cumfy Sun 20-Jan-13 13:01:01

I love the The Tale of the Australian Speeding Judge.

I'm sure he will enjoy it too!

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