to not understand why strapless wedding dresses are so popular?

(163 Posts)
Floogel Fri 11-Jan-13 11:28:45

I just think that on lots of people they are not the most flattering style. Yes they do look great on some people, but I don't get why 99% of the styles are strapless?

flowery Fri 11-Jan-13 11:30:00

YANBU. For a large proportion of people they are not the most flattering style, but I guess it's the fashion. Has been for a long time though hasn't it?

Doyouhearthepeoplesing Fri 11-Jan-13 11:30:35

Because then you have the option of adding sleeves or not.

I hate strapless but have bought a strapless and having it altered as no other dress did.

SaraBellumHertz Fri 11-Jan-13 11:32:13

Bit like leggings really...

Nancy66 Fri 11-Jan-13 11:34:28

I agree. They only suit very slim, small-busted brides.

Another thing that wearers don't allow for is that, on the day, they will be very nervous and that may lead to a flushed chest.

specialsubject Fri 11-Jan-13 11:35:22

strapless needs slim toned arms and shoulders.

I did go to a wedding where the bride was slim and toned with small boobs (and 25), and looked lovely in her strapless dress. I have also seen some SHOCKING photos of strapless dress brides, who badly needed someone to say before hand 'let's be honest love, you are too fat for that'.

TheBrideofMucky Fri 11-Jan-13 11:39:19

I'm having a strapless one you horrible lot! But I'm young and have toned arms and am getting married in the middle of the summer, am I allowed? grin

FamiliesShareGerms Fri 11-Jan-13 11:40:29

YANBU.

samandi Fri 11-Jan-13 11:41:02

YANBU. I don't get the strapless thing full stop really. The rare times I've worn strapless dresses I've been worried about them falling down and constantly having to hitch them up. They can look nice, but then again you can look half naked wearing them. Personally my favourites are dresses with high necks, Oriental style.

Floogel Fri 11-Jan-13 11:41:20

TheBrideofMucky sure you will look great! They look ace on some people. Just not on everyone. And everyone seems to go for them!

HazleNutt Fri 11-Jan-13 11:42:54

YANBU. They're like leggings and skinny jeans - great on a very small number of people actually wearing them and horrible on rest.

WorraLiberty Fri 11-Jan-13 11:43:39

YANBU and even on the slim and toned, the back can be so tight it makes the skin look pinched.

TheBrideofMucky Fri 11-Jan-13 11:43:45

My father is a wedding photographer and he says the same. I think I will have to get his official approval before I'm allowed down the aisle in it. grin

AllBellyandBoobs Fri 11-Jan-13 11:43:47

I wore a strapless dress despite having huge boobs. Before going shopping my only stipulation was that the dress mustn't be strapless but it turned out to be the one that suited me most and actually minimized by bust. In fact, I even went braless on the day as the dress was structured enough to support me without giving my boobs the extra oomph that wearing a bra did.

Without any bias, I obviously looked lovely smile.

Floogel Fri 11-Jan-13 11:44:43

I prefer something like this myself:

www.phase-eight.co.uk/fcp/product/phase-eight/Wedding-Dresses/Maria-Wedding-Dress/201648106

Think it is really classy grin

Icelollycraving Fri 11-Jan-13 11:44:49

Bollocks,I looked bloody fantastic. I am not slim by any stretch of the imagination.

TheBrideofMucky Fri 11-Jan-13 11:45:27

*Not about me looking great btw (although thanks for being kind!) just that everybody seems to go for them whether they suit them or not.

LadyBeagleEyes Fri 11-Jan-13 11:48:15

That one is stunning Floogel.

SaraBellumHertz Fri 11-Jan-13 11:48:30

thebride they can look lovely.

I wore strapless - I was a 25 year old toned size 8 with great boobs grin

Doyouhearthepeoplesing Fri 11-Jan-13 11:49:51

floogel that's how I'm having my dress altered to be like. I need the structured corset of a strapless due to back problems and an hour glass shape, but want the lace to cover the bust area and give a bit of modesty, by buying strapless I've got the flexibility to choose how the dress looks.

It won't be strapless on the day [gron]

Crinkle77 Fri 11-Jan-13 11:49:54

I prefer something with sleeves as I think they are far more demure for a wedding

Doyouhearthepeoplesing Fri 11-Jan-13 11:50:24

grin even!!

Floogel Fri 11-Jan-13 11:51:50

I love sleeves! but hard to find many w. dresses with sleeves.

Doyouhearthepeoplesing Fri 11-Jan-13 11:52:50
TheCraicDealer Fri 11-Jan-13 11:52:57

It's like how in the 1990's the fashion was for meringues with fake floral head-dresses, the 80's were massive bows and mutton sleeves....the 2000's have strapless dresses, often accessorised with back fat. They'll date massively. Unfortunately lace detailing (which I love) will probably be the next mass "style" due to K-Middy's dress.

But you know, it's the bride's day and so long as she feels fabulous and we keep our judging to ourselves everyone's happy!

RobinSparkles Fri 11-Jan-13 11:55:28

I had a strapless one and I regret it now. I did actually suit it very well as I have nice shoulders and I am slim but I have seen so many dresses that are similar now, I wish I had gone for something different.

TheBrideofMucky Fri 11-Jan-13 11:58:30

This is mine. It's not very demure but we aren't marrying in church and have been together years and years and have two young children so everyone in attendance already knows I'm not virginal. grin

https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=maggie+sottero+penny&hl=en&safe=off&client=safari&tbo=u&tbm=isch&source=univ&sa=X&ei=P_7vUMifMIGm0QX8-YGQDQ&ved=0CC0QsAQ&biw=320&bih=416#i=2

Alisvolatpropiis Fri 11-Jan-13 12:00:27

They look lovely on some but they're just so ubiquitous these days.

TheBrideofMucky Fri 11-Jan-13 12:05:43

I expect it's going to be a generational thing. My mum kept her wedding dress just in case I wanted to wear it. We opened the box recently and fell about, it's a huge thing with flouncy sleeves and embroidered flowers. Luckily I don't have daughters as they will definitely feel the same about mine in twenty years. grin

Doyouhearthepeoplesing Fri 11-Jan-13 12:07:08

I don't know if it is a generational thing. Mine is very similar to my mums. Very classical design really.

KittyBreadfan Fri 11-Jan-13 12:07:12

YANBU, its actually difficult to find a wedding dress with straps or sleeves at the moment! My first wedding dress was strapless and I looked awful, I'm short with huge boobs and it just didn't look right, plus I spent the whole time worrying about popping out. I got changed as soon as the reception started.

When I get married this year I'm having my dress made for me. With sleeves!

They can look lovely and there are some really stunning ones but its definitely not a look that suits everyone.

Solo Fri 11-Jan-13 12:08:14

link
A bride that shouldn't have worn a strapless dress imo...

TheBrideofMucky Fri 11-Jan-13 12:08:25

My mum's was a real meringue. But must have been fashionable at the time as I have seen a lot of my friends' mothers sporting similar styles in their photos around about the same time.

KittyBreadfan Fri 11-Jan-13 12:08:37

Bride of Mucky that's a lovely dress smile

YANBU. They do look lovely on some, but it doesn't suit most. I idly browse dresses on occasion and know I would like shite in a strapless, and also, I have no boobs to hold them up so it'd have to be really tight, which would hurt my chest, so I'd rather not! My sister looked lovely in one though!

Fakebook Fri 11-Jan-13 12:09:20

Yanbu. They only shit women without underarm hanging flesh.

Fakebook Fri 11-Jan-13 12:09:43

Suit, not shit.

I wore a strapless dress, Im not skinny but my decolletage is my best feature. I flaunted it grin

SpicyPear Fri 11-Jan-13 12:10:57

YANBU. I wore strapless and it was a mistake. I wasn't fat, but also not slim or toned enough and the structured corset made the tops of my arms look all flabby. I'm also very pasty and did flush with nerves. That was six years ago so I'm surprised it's still the fashion.

javotte Fri 11-Jan-13 12:10:58

It was all I could find at less than £200 for my wedding in 2008. It was really unflattering. Damn fashion...

TheCraicDealer Fri 11-Jan-13 12:12:07

Bride, if you're going to go strapless, that's the way to do it. Lovely!

sooperdooper Fri 11-Jan-13 12:13:14

I got married last year and I got so annoyed going round wedding dress shops, 99.9% of them are A-Line and strapless, just like every wedding dress at every wedding I've ever been to - yawn - I don't ever wear strapless, I'm a 38DD, why would I start on my wedding day?

I tried some on but never felt comfortable, I ended up getting a beautiful dress from Anouska G at House of Fraser, loved it

TheBrideofMucky Fri 11-Jan-13 12:17:02

Thanks for that, means a lot as I haven't shown many people yet and am a bit nervous about the choice. Was worried you were all going to throw up on your keyboards. grin

Anoushka G does some really lovely things Sooper, I had a bridesmaid dress for a friend's wedding last summer and it was beautiful.

TheCraicDealer Fri 11-Jan-13 12:17:15

This is the wedding dress equivalent of "blah" I think you're getting at, sooper.

RuleBritannia Fri 11-Jan-13 12:17:22

<sighs> There was a time when brides (in church) were supposed to look demure. Neck high dresses with sleeves. Mine was beautiful silk with silver embroidery, a boat neck and sleeves. Looking at it now, I wonder how I managed to fasten the buttons all the way up the front! It was fitted and straight and absolutely lovely!

RuleBritannia Fri 11-Jan-13 12:18:48

And fat people should not wear strapless or fitted dresses. It makes me roll eyes.

ClartyCarol Fri 11-Jan-13 12:18:51

Solo - shock at that photo! Got to be photoshopped surely, unless the whole thing burst open with the weight of her generous bosom.

Can't comment on dresses, I wore a trouser suit grin.

Spatsky Fri 11-Jan-13 12:21:34

I had a halter neck

PaellaUmbrella Fri 11-Jan-13 12:24:35

Floogel

That was my wedding dress! I loved wearing it so much. I really didn't want a strapless dress and was starting to get frustrated at 99% of dresses being bloody strapless. Then I walked into House of Fraser and saw that one grin

IMO strapless is unflattering unless you are very slim, have very toned arms and a small chest. There is nothing more unsightly than a bride with a back cleavage, hoisting up her dress all day long.

To be honest, most wedding dresses aren't especially flattering on people who aren't relatively slim. Because they are long white dresses. White isn't the most slimming colour. And long dresses that are A line just look a huge mass of material which is why strapless look nice - they show some skin to break up the whiteness. And if they are straight or fitted, you need to be slim too. The dress Floogel linked to from Phase Eight is beautiful, but it still wouldn't look much better on plumper person than a strapless.

SneakyNuts Fri 11-Jan-13 12:35:12

Floogel the Phase Eight dress you posted is the one/style I'm going for smile

wonkylegs Fri 11-Jan-13 12:35:46

solo that's not just strapless they also forgot to put in half the material across the bust!!!
I don't care about anyone else but mine suited me. I do have the right body shape tho (tiny hourglass) & I was young & toned.
I tried lots of styles including sleeves and it just was the one that looked best. It wasn't what I thought I'd get and wouldn't have even tried it on if somebody else hadn't suggested it.

Longdistance Fri 11-Jan-13 12:39:21

I don't like the strapless ones, and had one with straps. I wed in 2009.

My dress was by Amanda Wyatt and a called Delores.

Sorry can't link blush

marchwillsoonbehere Fri 11-Jan-13 12:41:17

And fat people should not wear strapless or fitted dresses. It makes me roll eyes.

Well we mustn't offend you must we hmm so let's pass a law right away!

If I am missing a huge dose of irony here Britannia then I apologise, but if you are serious then it's just as well you weren't at my wedding because I am fat and wore a strapless fitted ( and flared) dress. (with a shawl) Sometimes tbh I think it was a bit of a car crash, but mostly I think my smile was so ear to ear and I was so lit up from the inside that I don't think anybody noticed the dress.

In general though, I think , ahem, voluptuous women do far more justice to strapless than do thin ones! Thin women look good is sheath/shifts and erm, that's it.

MummyPig24 Fri 11-Jan-13 12:42:50

Oh shit. I've chosen a strapless dress. I didn't want strapless but fell in love with this dress, the way it made me look and feel. It has a sort of chiffon fabric halter neck which I didn't like and was having taken off but i wonder if I can get it made into shoulder straps instead. I have big boobs and don't want to be pulling it up all day. sad

Doyouhearthepeoplesing Fri 11-Jan-13 12:43:44

Big boobs look better in a corset than flat chests imo

elizaregina Fri 11-Jan-13 12:46:51

yanbu

soo bored of strapless even when they look nice just one long boring blur..

loved the phase 8 and monsoon ones are lovley.

specialsubject Fri 11-Jan-13 12:50:42

in short, like any other item of clothing, a strapless dress looks great on some and terrible on others.

the important thing is not to make the KateM mistake and look like a doll on a toilet roll,especially when your bridesmaid's outfit makes everyone watching roll over and go 'PHWOAR'. Particularly when 'everyone' is a huge television audience.

BTW wedding dresses don't have to come from wedding dress shops. Mine didn't and I still wear it occasionally two decades later. It isn't white and it isn't strapless.

The bit I think is funny is that I've come across so many women around here going on about original dresses.....and they are all the same, ivory strapless gowns.

There's a bridal shop across the street from the music shop where DD takes piano lessons, and I'd estimate at least 95% of the dresses are ivory strapless gowns.

Mine was strapless and I was 7 months pregnant!

I looked awesome...it was also black.

Tailtwister Fri 11-Jan-13 12:52:34

We were married in 2008 and it was next to impossible to find a dress with sleeves. I was very slim and small chested, but very pale and didn't want so much flesh on display (DH's Grandfather was marrying us). I very nearly had one made, but eventually found one with sleeves.

I think strapless dresses do look nice, but it's nice to have a little jacket over the top (or a veil) to cover your shoulders during the ceremony.

I am amazed that the fashion has remained for so long though.

LadyBeagleEyes Fri 11-Jan-13 12:54:55

I loved Kate Middleton's dress.

They are popular because they are cheap to make. Much easier to manufacture a dress with no sleeves or neckline, and with an adjustable waist (coset style).

specialknickers Fri 11-Jan-13 12:57:46

Try finding a dress that isn't strapless though... I got married in 2009 and couldn't believe how little choice there was. Even in the fanciest wedding boutique in Islington all the bloody frocks looked the same. After wasting 3 weekends trawling the vintage shops of north and west London I gave up and bought something in the sale at debenhams (a shop I had never been to before or since) and tried not to think too much about it. Grim times!

TheCraicDealer Fri 11-Jan-13 12:58:30

So did I, LadyBeagle. I was a bit bummed out when I saw it actually. I would've wanted something like that, different to the strapless a-line stuff, but now if you went for a similar style you'd get people going "ooooh, like Kate Middleton?".

DragonMamma Fri 11-Jan-13 12:59:17

YANBU

They don't suit 80% of people who wear them. I was adamant I didn't want one and thankfully found one that wasn't. Here is the one I wore - I loved it my non strapless dress

Doyouhearthepeoplesing Fri 11-Jan-13 13:01:30

How do you all feel about converse for wedding shoes grin

I didn't have white or ivory- I was far too impure to get away with it grin

I wore Iron Fist zombie flats Doyouhearthepeoplesing

KittyBreadfan Fri 11-Jan-13 13:04:08

Doyouhearthepeoplesing luffs it! Considering the idea for my wedding.

TheCraicDealer Fri 11-Jan-13 13:04:15

That's gorgeous DragonMamma! You're lucky, cap sleeves are not my friends.

Doyouhearthepeoplesing Fri 11-Jan-13 13:04:18

I have several pairs of iron fist pumps and they're so comfy I'm tempted to wear a pair of those

Doyouhearthepeoplesing Fri 11-Jan-13 13:04:52

Basically I'm against uncomfy heels grin

Nancy66 Fri 11-Jan-13 13:04:54

dragonmamma - that's a really beautiful dress

They are so comfy aren't they? As I said, I was 7 months pregnant so comfort as key...I don't have any full length pics on this laptop but here's me...the dress was plain black, the sahs/bouquet/buttonholes etc all made by me. Hope the link works.

sphotos-g.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-prn1/40162_487679699552_2745329_n.jpg

CwtchesAndCuddles Fri 11-Jan-13 13:09:13

YANBU

When I got married in 2004 I got fed up of looking for a dress, strapless doesn't suit me and it wasn't what I wanted. I actually asked as soon as I went into one shop "do you have any dresses with sleeves?" The owner gave me a bit of a funny look, and then found one with sleeves - pity it was backless!!!

I ended up making mine.

Doyouhearthepeoplesing Fri 11-Jan-13 13:09:40

Aw you look gorgeous!

TheCraicDealer Fri 11-Jan-13 13:09:45

Doyouhear, Toms have a wedding collection. The pale pink wedges are v cute and would give you a bit of height if that's something you're thinking about. Comfy as well!

Trills Fri 11-Jan-13 13:10:27

Ah, a classic smile

It feels all cosy and familiar.

Have we had "back fat" an "fat armpits" yet?

What about the question of tattoos?

Shoot me, I was a size 14 with big boobs and wore strapless. I got married in 2006 and there were barely any with sleeves to be found. The few which did exist were very mature looking and would have looked really silly on me (I was 20 when I got married). And whilst I don't have the best arms I still think it suited me.

However I did wear a custom made steel boned corset underneath it - no sagging here!

scarletforya Fri 11-Jan-13 13:11:33

YANBU

They're nasty.

soverylucky Fri 11-Jan-13 13:13:18

YANBU
1. Nearly everyone has a strapless gown.
2. The dreaded "back cleavage" where it has been laced up too tight on a flabby back.
3. The structure of them can make a big boobed girl look awful when she sits down as everything gets pushed up. You end up looking like a medieval wench.
4. Arms look flabby and horrid.

I would like to point out that I am fat and large chested. I did not wear a strapless gown.

Doyouhearthepeoplesing Fri 11-Jan-13 13:13:25

craic I'm 6' marrying a 5'9 man... I'm not sure he'd like me adding more height grin

Thanks, pretty much everything was hand-made, even my hair!

The dress was a £35 maternity evening dress...gotta love a bargain!

DragonQueen Fri 11-Jan-13 13:13:58

Because strapless dresses are easy for designers/shops/factories to make. Much more simple than straps or sleeves.

They are even easier to make when they come with lacing on the back - almost a one size fits all approach.

That's why they are so ubiquitous, they offer a much bigger profit margin.

I agree though, they are a flattering style on very few people, slim straps or cap sleeves or long sleeves are far more flattering.

TheCraicDealer Fri 11-Jan-13 13:13:59

HAAAAAA!!!!!

Doyouhearthepeoplesing Fri 11-Jan-13 13:14:30

Your big smile is the first thing that's noticeable tbh scarlet

Hahaa....I'm 5'10" and my DH is 5'7" (and a half...very important!) grin

McNewPants2013 Fri 11-Jan-13 13:18:20

I had a strapless dress and I looked stunning, I am size 14-16 with 36f bust.

It was altered so I was spilling out and wore a coset to keep all the lumps and bumps in place.

If I was going to get married again I would go for straps as by the end of the night I was very uncomfortable.

I did have sandles for when heels got to much

Scarlet, you looked stunning. Your happiness shines through <goes all soppy>

LadyBeagleEyes Fri 11-Jan-13 13:40:46

You look ever so coool Scarlet.

atthewelles Fri 11-Jan-13 13:48:11

YANBU. Very few brides look good in them and they look very unoriginal at this stage. I am much more likely to find myself oohing and aahing over something a bit more covered up but floaty and elegant.

Aw shucks, thanks lovelies grin

I felt like a bloated whale and was in bed by 9pm

CloudsAndTrees Fri 11-Jan-13 14:15:02

Yanbu.

They are a sure fire way of getting back fat bulges that people will notice when you're taking your vows, unless you are particularly toned.

MuddlingMackem Fri 11-Jan-13 14:29:56

Doyouhearthepeoplesing Fri 11-Jan-13 13:01:30

>>>> How do you all feel about converse for wedding shoes <<<<

I went to a family wedding last year and the bride was wearing what I believe were DMs. grin

But surely a bride in a floor length dress can get away with any kind of shoes as the dress hides them. wink

TheCatIsEatingIt Fri 11-Jan-13 15:08:29

I'm not sure it's that they're popular, it's more that that's all that's available. I had strapless because the only ones with sleeves were frumpy, but had a bolero made from very similar fabric so that from a distance it looked like a dress with sleeves.

cannotbelievehowexpensive Fri 11-Jan-13 15:13:13

what a rather nasty, spiteful thread this is....slagging off women on how they look on their wedding day is low even for mumsnet! I have seen some beautiful brides in strapless dresses.

Floogel Fri 11-Jan-13 15:22:21

I didn't mean the thread to slag off people, just to question why 99% of styles seem to be strapless when it's a fashion that only suits a few......

ArtemisatBrauron Fri 11-Jan-13 15:34:21

No, they are a bit ubiquitous and definitely do not suit everyone! But on the other hand I wore a wedding dress with very thin straps and was told unceremoniously by a "friend" that I needed to get a bolero as I looked "too naked" (no cleavage at all on show, just shoulders/arms) so what do I know?

GW297 Fri 11-Jan-13 15:35:02

YANBU!

curryeater Fri 11-Jan-13 15:39:58

Just wanted to say that ScarlettLady's is one of the nicest wedding pics I have ever seen!

YouOldSlag Fri 11-Jan-13 15:43:24

YANBU. This is not a bitchy thread, and you're going to get hundreds of posters saying "well I wore it and I looked nice!".

However, what I don't understand is whether it's a chicken and egg situation. Do brides always wear strapless because it's hard to get anything else? and then did designers think "Oh everyone's wearing strapless so that's all we'll make?" Is it a vicious circle?

When I bought my wedding dress in 2006, the only dress with sleeves was the one I bought and I wasn't in love with it. I didn't want a strapless/bolero combo but there was literally no other choice.

It's THAT that annoys me. The fact that 99% of wedding dresses are strapless and people looking for sleeves have to look really hard or go online or go to a dressmaker. Plus there are SOOO many strapless dresses that whenever you know a wedding is coming up, the bride's dress always looks the same to me.

emsyj Fri 11-Jan-13 15:52:50

I used to sell wedding dresses, and lots of women would walk in and say, 'I don't want strapless but that's all I can find everywhere else'. I don't think it is predictable who will look good in strapless to be honest - it's not about whether you're thin or fat or have big or small boobs etc, I've seen different shaped necklines and bodices look very different on various shapes and some very slim women look dreadful in strapless, others look great, same for those who are bigger.

I didn't want strapless as I have fat arms and a bony xylophone chest, so I had mine made - me in my dress grin - any excuse! I got married in 2009 and it was either strapless or get it made....

YouOldSlag Fri 11-Jan-13 15:57:38

emsy- you look beautiful, really classy.

I think strapless dresses expose too much and I really object to the fact that if you don't like them you have to go to loads of trouble to get a wedding dress from a dressmaker or order online and risk it not suiting when you try it on.

There's a massive business opportunity here, why can't strapless dress suppliers see it?

Thistledew Fri 11-Jan-13 16:00:24

I think it is such a shame that there is still such an expectation that a bride will wear a white/cream/ivory dress, as well as the ubiquitousness of the strapless style.

For a lot of women this is the most they will ever spend on a dress, and the most time and attention they will put into choosing it. It is also a day above others that you will want to look your absolute best. So why stick with white? Why is going for a colour still seen as such an oddity?

I am getting married this year and will be having a dress with a square neckline, little cap sleeves, and it is a gorgeous dark gold colour. It has been really quite odd but I have had several people get all interested in asking me what it will look like, right up to the point when I say that it will not be white, whereupon they have abruptly lost interest and not asked a single other question.

emsyj Fri 11-Jan-13 16:03:36

Aaaah, thanks YouOldSlag - to be fair I think the fashion is starting to move forward. The mainstream designers like Alfred Angelo, Maggie Sottero etc will take a while to catch up, but the higher end ones are moving away from a fully strapless collection and if you have £££ to spend you can find non-strapless dresses - but if you're on a budget it's much harder, as non-strapless styles are the more fashion forward UK designers in my experience, and they are often made here and cost more.

Interesting point raised that strapless are easier to make and therefore have a higher profit margin... I'd never thought about it that way, but it makes sense. It's no doubt much easier to fit a corset-backed strapless dress on a variety of sizes than it is to make sure sleeves are placed correctly and straps sit properly with necklines in the right place etc.

ithaka Fri 11-Jan-13 16:10:48

I thought Kate Middleton's dress was lovely (for whoever slagged it off further up the thread).

YANBU, strapless suits so few. All clothes look better on the slim (hence models being skinny), so this isn't about size, but rather it is an unflattering style for just about everyone.

I was lucky, as my mum made my wedding dress - we married in 1993 (god, that long ago) and my dress was regency/jane austen stylee with a little short old gold velvet jacket. This was just BEFORE the infamous TV Pride & Predj with Colin Firth. My dress looked v much like something Jennifer Ehle wore, but I married before then so was not copying (gah!).

curryeater Fri 11-Jan-13 16:12:52

Thistledew - link please? (cheeky)

I have a thread in s & b which is very sparsely populated. Love the sound of dark gold

Gingefringe Fri 11-Jan-13 16:25:10

My SIL had a strapless dress which looked lovely on. However, a few drinks down the line she stood on the front of her dress and pulled it down to reveal her boobs!! Very embarrassing.

I think strapless dresses are fine, it's just the back fat and tattoos that make them look unattractive.

Thistledew Fri 11-Jan-13 16:25:24

Sorry curry, but I can't link because it is being designed from scratch for me by a close friend of the family who is a dress maker! I have gone from being a bit 'meh' about the whole thing to being ridiculously excited about the dress. My friend is part way through making a toile at the moment, and I spent a few days over Christmas saying "how about a bit more of a tuck here, a flounce there, and angle on that bit", and seeing it starting to come together. I know I am very lucky in having a skilled friend who can do this for me without spending the price of a small house, but I know several women who have spent several thousand pounds and still just ended up with an ivory strapless dress.

Ughfootballseason Fri 11-Jan-13 16:27:02

Mine had removable sleeves and when I look at the pictures I looked much nicer when the sleeves were on.

My figure was (at the time, ha!) fine for it but without the sleeves it did indeed look ubiquitous.

This one. www.stephanieallin.net/collections/a-fine-romance/casablanca/

Latonia Fri 11-Jan-13 16:33:59

I heard somewhere that there are so many strapless dresses in the shops because they are cheap to make compared to those with sleeves, so it's partially manufacturer led.

slug Fri 11-Jan-13 16:41:47

ScarlettLady SNAP!! I also got married at 7 months pregnant and in black. I had a dress from Ghost, chosen for the strechiness.

Sallyingforth Fri 11-Jan-13 17:10:17

What I don't like about strapless dresses is that the structure built into the bodice often gives it such a hard, un-natural shape - more like a suit of armour than a garment.

curryeater - thank-you so much. We couldn't afford a photographer so all pics were taken by family and friends.

slug - I love seeing people's faces when you say you got married in black....priceless grin

TheBrideofMucky Fri 11-Jan-13 19:18:43

Beautiful ScarletLady! Your whole face is lit up, you have a lovely smile. Good dress too grin.

sockmuppet Fri 11-Jan-13 19:21:59

Actually high necks and sleeves for women with big boobs looks awful

MamaBear17 Fri 11-Jan-13 19:29:59

I think a whole range of women can pull off strapless, they just need to go for the right fit. Mine was strapless but I wore a feather bolero with it because I got married at Christmas. I loved my look on the day, wish I could do it all again!

CheapBread Fri 11-Jan-13 20:36:02

Yanbu
GOD I love that Phase 8 dress. I want to get married again, in that! Also liked Emsyj one, quite 50s!

I'm super 'meh' about wedding dresses, they're all the same and overpriced.

I'm slim and (v) small chested and I looked like a boy in the beasts I tried on anyway. Mine had thin straps as it was a thin material dress.

I find it mad that 70s brides had everything covered bar their faces and fingers and modern brides practically have their baps out. (I'm sure I've said this before...)

GregBishopsBottomBitch Fri 11-Jan-13 20:52:08

http://www.weddingdresses.com/files/2010/10/revealingweddingdress.jpg

I think this is what OP means, sorry dont know how to link them yet.

ChaoticintheNewYear Fri 11-Jan-13 20:55:25
GregBishopsBottomBitch Fri 11-Jan-13 20:56:18

Scarlet Such a beautiful photo, and you owned not being traditional, not all dresses have to be white.

GregBishopsBottomBitch Fri 11-Jan-13 20:57:07

Thanks Chaotic

Not sure why someone would wear a dress like that.

onetiredmummy Fri 11-Jan-13 20:59:34

Its not just white, you can have floral if you like...& a little something in your hair perhaps

giant sleeves anyone

ChaoticintheNewYear Fri 11-Jan-13 21:02:48

Strapless dresses are like everything else, they suit some but not other's.

ScarlettLady you look lovely smile

ChaoticintheNewYear Fri 11-Jan-13 21:08:10

Greg you're welcome smile

I personally, if ever I did get married, would avoid wearing ivory/cream/white. I tried on a cream coloured cardigan last year and you've heard of the saying death warmed up well...I was more death stone cold. The colour just drained from my face. I can get away with wearing a white vest because of the expanse of skin between the white and my face but unless I went for a strapless number, which I'd prefer to avoid, I'd end up looking like the zombie bride grin

shotofexpresso Fri 11-Jan-13 21:09:03

I totally agree, unless you have slim arms and small tits you look awful and/or spend your entire day hoiking!

Porkster Fri 11-Jan-13 21:12:14

I think they are no longer the fashion, as lace with sleeves has taken over.

Although some can look amazing in strapless, many look atrocious with back fat and dinner lady arms. No-one even remotely fat should wear them, imo.

ZuleikaJambiere Fri 11-Jan-13 21:12:30

When I was wedding dress shopping (2006) I threw a bridezilla strop and flounced out of a shop when I was told that I'd 'have to wear strapless because that's the fashion and if I didn't like it then tough'. I found a beautiful long sleeved dress in another shop, which suited my figure and the weather much better

shotofexpresso Fri 11-Jan-13 21:12:36

I will say this though there is very little variety other than strapless you have to hunt the classier numbers out, I'm a B2B I want an off the shoulder beauty & the beast style gown, not the easiest to find, so I'm having it made.

GregBishopsBottomBitch Fri 11-Jan-13 21:15:41

My sister wore a strapless dress at her wedding, shes small busted and looked beautiful, i couldnt wear that dress as my boobs are F cup, i'd be spilling out of them.

JumpingJackSprat Fri 11-Jan-13 21:31:03

Ughfootball that casablanca dress is amazing such a beautiful shape. thats what a wedding dress should be like in my humble opinion. only with sleeves though.

one of my favourite dresses is maggie sotteros cassia - got my eye on it for if i get married!

2kidsintow Fri 11-Jan-13 21:32:44

When I got married, strapless wasn't really an option.
But meringues were!

Every wedding dress had big puffy sleeves, usually with ruffles.
Lots of lace and embroidery on the bodice.
A big train.
Cutouts with lace and bead inserts on the sleeves and skirt.

Not lovely.

I wish dresses like this had been available at the time I got married ('92)
www.phase-eight.co.uk/fcp/product/warehouse/Wedding-Dresses/Elizabeth-Wedding-Dress/201337106

GregBishopsBottomBitch Fri 11-Jan-13 21:35:21

2 that dress is beautiful,very similar to what i'd want.

2kidsintow Fri 11-Jan-13 21:37:37
OTheYuleManatee Fri 11-Jan-13 21:42:27

I am small of boob and broad of shoulder, narrow of waist and broad of hip. I went with strapless 50s style with epic underskirts and vintage lace worked into the bodice, plus a bolero in the same lace as my arms are not skinny. Everyone said I looked amazing grin

YANBU though about strapless dresses on people who really, really haven't thought about it.

ChaoticintheNewYear Fri 11-Jan-13 21:46:57

I do like that phase eight one.

OTheYule sounds lovely. Any chance of a pic? grin

LurcioLovesFrankie Fri 11-Jan-13 21:48:08

Because (based on having been a bridesmaid several times and traipsed round inordinate numbers of wedding dress shops) there is nothing else available! I have a theory which says "follow the money". As someone who's done a lot of dress making, sleeves use a surprising amount of material, and are difficult to set in place (and so require a lot of skilled woman-hours - I think I'm right in assuming most of the labour in the far-east factories where the bulk of wedding dresses are manufactured are women). So it costs money to make dresses with long sleeves, and this eats into your profits. Never mind the fact that there are very, very few women who actually look good in boned sleeveless dresses (too curvaceous and you get the icecream oozing over the cone effect, too slender and it looks like you have a lampshade strapped to your torso as it stands proud of your boobs at the top).

tipsandtops Fri 11-Jan-13 21:49:37

YANBU. I think a lot of people pick them because they think non-strapless dresses are a bit frumpy, plus the corset-style of strapless dress means you can get a nice figure...from the boobs down. But as everyone has said, then you have the problem of back fat.

I was adamant that I didn't want strapless. The shops had a lot more strapless dresses than everything else, but it wasn't exclusively strapless. High necks and cap sleeves are becoming more and more popular, especially with the higher end designers. This is mine I hope I look as good as she does in it.

ChaoticintheNewYear Fri 11-Jan-13 21:54:30

Lovely dress tips

I'm a 36DD and wouldn't look good in a high neck either. I can do sleeves but would have to be with something similar to the neckline on the dress that you've linked to.

Thank-you everyone for the lovely comments.

HouseOfBears Fri 11-Jan-13 22:25:23

Ok, so for those saying anyone who isn't slim shouldn't wear strapless, please enlighten me as to what style dress us unfortunate fatties should actually be wearing?! Trust me, cap sleeves and straps look equally bad on chunky bingo-winged arms and broad shoulders, high neck makes big boobs look horrific, and anything un-corseted is much less flattering around the rest of the body. So whilst there are some beautiful suggestions on this thread, I haven't seen any that would suit anyone larger than a size 10!

GregBishopsBottomBitch Fri 11-Jan-13 22:54:27

I think strapless can look nice on bigger women, its really heavy busted women like me, who couldnt get away with them, unless it was well supported.

LibraryMum8 Fri 11-Jan-13 23:24:30

Had to chime in on this one! I got married almost 13 years ago and even then everything was strapless! I was an "older" first time bride, I got married at 36. I was thin but not toned and I never wore strapless anything in my life (just don't have good arms) and certainly wasn't going to wear one on my wedding day!

I found ONE dress that was not strapless short sleeved instead. When I went back to buy it, it was Gone, turned out it was there but on the clearance rack! Apparently no one wanted even the last dress that was not strapless! Thankfully I rescued it and bought it! I truly can't believe this fad has not died out yet.

Bumblequeen Fri 11-Jan-13 23:36:40

I had a full dress (fitted down to waist) with slim straps. I knew I did not want a strapless dress as I had seen so many brides in them previously I like to be different.

Apart from the small details such as diamonte, pearls, gathering which you can only see if standing right in front of the bride they virtually all look the same.

hammyimo Fri 11-Jan-13 23:38:04

I don't think they are popular - certainly when I got married (around 8 years ago) there literally was nothing else available. I wore a shawl around my giant broad shoulders.

Bumblequeen Fri 11-Jan-13 23:40:20

A few of my female family members married in the 60's. To this day they look beautiful and classy in their photographs. The dresses are not at all what brides would wear today but they are not cringeworthy like the 80's style.

BrandonFlowersHoHoHo Fri 11-Jan-13 23:56:29

What a sad thread...I felt like a million dollars in my dress. I'm a size 14, not particularly toned, 36C bust, probably showing some back fat, no tattoo though thank fuck. Makes me look at my wedding pics and feel like a whale now. Ah well,

BrandonFlowersHoHoHo Fri 11-Jan-13 23:56:29

What a sad thread...I felt like a million dollars in my dress. I'm a size 14, not particularly toned, 36C bust, probably showing some back fat, no tattoo though thank fuck. Makes me look at my wedding pics and feel like a whale now. Ah well,

apostropheuse Sat 12-Jan-13 00:07:09

YANBU

Very few women suit those dresses, but everyone seems to wear them.

Back fat, pasty skin, overflowing breasts, and tattoos, very classy.

I sometimes wonder if bridal shops hypnotise them when the walk through the door so that they see a different image to what everyone else sees.

Oh well surely the fad will eventually end.

GregBishopsBottomBitch Sat 12-Jan-13 00:16:15

I seen it on Telly recently, big breasts stuffed into a strapless dress, that just looks awful.

BrandonFlowersHoHoHo Sat 12-Jan-13 00:18:36

I wonder why others care so much about what people chose to wear tbh...does it affect you in any way, shape or form? When I see a bride I just think how happy she looks, I've never looked at a bride and judged her choice of dress/tattoo/boobs blah blah blah. People just like to make themselves feel better by slating others imo.

Adversecamber Sat 12-Jan-13 00:22:17

I wore a dress with small sleeves, my niece looked beautiful in her strapless wedding dress but she is tiny and would look amazing in anything.

fossil971 Sat 12-Jan-13 00:23:02

That's so true about the 1960's. My mum got married in an ivory silk empire line/sheath dress with a lace bodice over and white kitten heels - it wouldn't have looked out of place this year.

I had to make my dress because I wanted a princess line dress and it was the meringue-tastic 1990s - it had a wide neck and tiny cap sleeves. I would not have looked good in strapless, I'm over a foot shorter than DH and you need a continuous line from shoulder to floor to get an impression of height. There is no excusing the crusty Pronuptia plastic-pearl tiara though....

It does come down to availability but if there was more choice brides could have an equally beautiful dress in terms of fabric, trims, style but with just a little more support and choice of shape at the top.

Dfg15 Sat 12-Jan-13 00:34:23

i worked for a while at a venue that did weddings and most of the brides that wore strapless dresses really shouldn't have. They all had back cleavage and looked awful. If they had worn dresses that covered more flesh they could have looked beautiful. Something else I noticed too was that a lot of the larger brides had themed weddings, we had a Dr Who wedding, a Robin Hood one, a gangster casino one and all the brides wore strapless dresses. I'm really not being bitchy here, just making an observation!

I got married in 2008 and wore a v-neck dress like this

I have been to quite a few weddings in the past five or so years and every bride has worn strapless and they have all looked beautiful! The dresses have not looked the same even though they have the same neckline and they have suited a wide variety of shapes and sizes.

I think what matters is choosing a dress you love, feel comfortable in and that fits you well. I have bigger boobs so I was happier in a v-neck, I felt more supported.

TheCatInTheHairnet Sat 12-Jan-13 02:09:33

Fluffy, I love that dress!

I got married over 14 years ago and strapless were the trend that came straight after my wedding. Initially, I was all "Oh! Why didn't I think of that?!!" but to be honest, I'm still happy with the dress I chose. Sleeved corset top with long straight skirt, long train and big, F off veil. Very end of 90s though!!

andrea315 Sat 12-Jan-13 02:44:31

I bought a strapless dress and had straps put on it !!

sashh Sat 12-Jan-13 06:33:53

I think the key is to be honest about your shape and height and dress whatever it is flateringly.

I went to a weddin in the 1980s where the bride wore what was fashionable at the time which was a fitted top with the seams sort of round the edge of your boobs and darts under the boobs.

But the bride didn't have any boobs so the material sort of pooled around her chest.

Hobbitation Sat 12-Jan-13 06:41:21

I got married in 2004 and wore one then, as my arms were very toned and I was a 34C so not very busty. The dress had straps originally, but after I had it fitted I hadn't realised the straps were now too long until the day, and ended up tucking them in! I think it's a very noughties look and would find it a bit dated to see someone in a dress like that now.

Notafoodbabyanymore Sat 12-Jan-13 09:55:17

I had a strapless dress and was curvaceous with big boobs at the time. (Now I'm just fat with big boobs!) I felt like a princess (and I'm not really the princessy type!) and I still love how I look in my photos.

I understand the OP's point and think it's a shame more styles aren't available for those who want them, but those people who are making nasty comments about women looking awful on their wedding days should be ashamed of themselves.

Queenmarigold Sat 12-Jan-13 10:00:34

Mine was strapless, but my arms and shoulders are slim and toned. Large boobs just made my waist look smaller and full skirt hid my fat thighs!
My advice- try lots on and see; every bride looks amazing anyway!

lljkk Sat 12-Jan-13 11:33:10

I wore one & looked great <<sticks tongue out>>

I guess it's a social change that many people are increasingly tolerant of fat on show, for better or worse. In spite of low BMI I have many flabby bits I would just as soon cover up -- I was bullied so much as a child, embarrassment sensors in overdrive. Maybe it's healthier to not care what's visible.

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