AIBU and V precious about dd2 going unrecognised at school?

(79 Posts)
TheSecondComing Thu 13-Dec-12 14:24:35

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Yes go into the school and tell them that your dds reception class is a fairly low acheiving group. They won't think you are a fucking loooooon or dead pushy, they will just think you are outrageously rude.

Oh I get pissed off about this too. My dd hasn't had a certificate since year 1 (year 2), she's also one of the bright ones. I don;t undertstand how it's worked out but the same names do tend to crop up. YANBU - but our children are clearly above such things wink

Festivedidi Thu 13-Dec-12 14:33:58

I think if it was me I might be tempted to mention to the teacher that the Christmas list was written by your dd. She may genuinely not know this and if it is a lot better than the usual standard her friend is producing then it would be entirely normal to praise this friend.

Is your dd bothered though? If she is, i would mention it, if not then I wouldn't.

Pancakeflipper Thu 13-Dec-12 14:35:24

The piece of work recognised yesterday is unfortunate. The teacher took it as the other kid's work and neither kid corrected them and the teacher may have been impressed at the other kid's perhaps greatly improved standard and sent it on for extra praise as assembly.

Maybe if they knew it was actually your daughter's it wouldn't have made the assemble because they expect that standard of work from her?

I forget the Christmas list incident.

I would start making a mental note on the ways your child is or is not getting praise - what systems the school use ( stickers, merits, weekly award etc) and perhaps have a word at the next parents evening?

I am not one for " ooh my child is wonderful." BUT my DS1 is a quiet happy get on with it kid. He never won any reward thing in his reception year and this included merits, weekly awards etc. All his reports and parents evenings were glowing. But he was under the radar of the teacher.

In year 1 I did have a chat to his teacher who didn't make me feel stupid or awkward and instantly said he was the reliable get on with it kid. And they made more effort with him and he blossomed.

carocaro Thu 13-Dec-12 14:37:32

Eeeks!!! I was all for you, until the last paragraph, 'low acheiving cohort' - that is not at all nice and exceeding horribly judgemental. You can't possibly know where all the other children are up to with their education, you daughter may have got it quickly, others take longer, it does not mean in anyway they are a 'low cohort' My DS2 is in Y6 and took longer than average to learn to read and write but is on track to get 5 & 6's when he leaves.

Maybe she's a bit of a know it all and tries to tell everyone what to do and how to do it and the teachers are trying to make her a little more humble before her acheivements are acknowledged.

If you went in and moaned about the other child, you are a shoo in for loon/pushy parent, however, if you feel she is being overlooked, which I doubt, do mention it. At our school we have star of the week, and they all get it eventually as they are only so many weeks in the school year, so some have to wait longer than others to get it, so just remember that alledegely near the top of the class does not mean she should be top of the list, as other factors count to being star of the week eg: kindness, good play, good friend etc etc.

We are only half way through the year, calm down dear!

TheSecondComing Thu 13-Dec-12 14:39:37

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Pancakeflipper Thu 13-Dec-12 14:42:29

It bothered my DS1 too, otherwise I wouldn't have known either. I was oblivious the the methods of rewards until he filled me in with the details and then my close mate whose daughter is in his class added in some others.

TheSecondComing Thu 13-Dec-12 14:44:53

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Welovecouscous Thu 13-Dec-12 14:46:06

It's not uncommon to not be reading yet in reception. Doesn't mean the other children are 'low achieving'. confused Statistically early readers are often overtaken later.

upstart68 Thu 13-Dec-12 14:48:31

Hi tbh I'd just leave it.

She won't be the only one who's not been recognised in this way and whilst a mistake has been made, it really isn't worth making a fuss about it.

Her time will come. We waited a long time for our dd to be rewarded and suddenly she was rewarded three weeks in a row.

Save bothering the teacher for something more serious.

You are only a term into reception. If it were still happening this time next year, then I'd probably say something to the teacher.

Hobbitation Thu 13-Dec-12 14:49:29

They usually give as many of them as possible a chance to be Star of the Week or whatever, I'm sure DD will get her chance to shine. DD1 was moaning about not being Star of the Week yet, others are getting it for "improving", but she can't improve as she tries her best all the time! Then last week she was. I'd let DD explain about the piece of work to the teacher. What did the teacher say about her at parents' evening? It takes time for each teacher to know a child as an individual. If she is far ahead of the others it won't go unnoticed, I assure you.

My DS is dyslexic and has to work 10 times as hard to acheive half as much as most of his classmates so him and the other children like him probably do get more recognition for 'less work' in the eyes of parents like you.

You are being very rude about a class of 4 year old children. I'm sure your daughter is just fantastic but it doesn't mean the rest of the class are low acheivers.

Festivedidi Thu 13-Dec-12 14:51:46

Could it be that they know she's quiet and think that singling her out in assembly would upset her. It would have upset my very quiet dd when she was in reception, she would have cried about everybody looking at her. She did want recognition but in a quieter way rather than announce it to everyone. Do they praise your dd in other ways?

carocaro Thu 13-Dec-12 14:53:13

How do you know only 2 other kids can read? The information is P&C, I'd be more concerned about how you got that knowledge, you can't possible know that. I am sure she gets lots of praise in the classroom setting and that should not be discounted, but will you only be happy with the all singing and dancing kind? What did they say about her at parents evening? Good I presume, why does this naot make you happy?

Again, eeeks, with your attitude.

WorraLorraTurkey Thu 13-Dec-12 14:56:37

Just leave it

She'll get her certificate and clap eventually.

It's only December and if they only have these assemblies every 2 weeks, they haven't had that many yet..considering the school year only started in September.

*FYI
Not being stealthy etc but dd is way ahead of her classmates (think they're a fairly low achieving cohort iyswim and dd2 is at the other end of the scale) this is nothing to do with me, she's just 'got it' quickly iyswim??? *

Sorry, you killed it with this last paragraph!

pigletmania Thu 13-Dec-12 14:57:38

I was agreeing with you op right until the last paragraph. I was one of those 'low acheivers' at primary school, a bit backward, ff 20 odd years I have a good degree and a good Msc an will hopefully do a doctorate in the future. That means nothing.

You get a group of adults you don't know who read at 2 or who read at 9, r who potty trained at 18 months or 4 years. Makes no difference how their like as adults. I would just leave it and wrk on a bit of humility

JustinBoobie Thu 13-Dec-12 15:00:49

our school makes absolutely sure all children are 'awarded' at assembly - especially at that age.

I'm sure her time will come.

Re low achievers in reception...my DS started school a week after he turned 4 and when he came out of reception year he still couldn't read or write etc etc so I suppose you could have said he was a lower achiever at that time.

He is now in year 6 and his reading/writing is well about average so really, low achievement in reception is a load of bollox anyway.

Just saying!

higgle Thu 13-Dec-12 15:01:27

My eldest son went to a school where only children from particular families ever got recognition, and we were constantly told by the deputy head that her daughter ( in the same class but put up a year, which I had to fight for for my son) was far brighter than him. He got his recognition in the end - school prizes in all subjects at secondary school and an Oxford place. I do believe little miss perfect has not had such a good outcome. Karma!

TheSecondComing Thu 13-Dec-12 15:04:43

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DonkeysInTheStableAtMidnight Thu 13-Dec-12 15:05:25

Blinking a little at "fairly low achieving cohort" but no I don't think it's unreasonable to hope your DD has consistently good work recognised as much as another child's outstanding beyond-the-usual effort. When does term end, might she yet get singled out?

As to whether I'd mention it, if by February half term there's still no moment in the spotlight for her, yes I'd ask. Boost her confidence at home, in the meantime.

My dd has been in her current school with the same teacher (they carried her over) since March last year and has not once been star of the week.

She is a LOW achiever.

Its hammering her confidence.

Teacher says they do star of the week by house points, dd is sen and forgets to put hers on, its infuriating

pigletmania Thu 13-Dec-12 15:10:50

Oh no whistling that is awful. I would have a word with the teacher to help her put the points on

I did have a word with her, the response was "well I do remind the class to put them on"

This is a child who comes out having forgot her coat/lunchbox/bag/book every single blooming night, she is not going to be able to remember to colour in squares!

She has also never had the reward trophy, nor star of the day, nor been allowed to pick from the prize box.

She has had an assembly prize box (pencil or well done card) twice and top table once. All by another teacher for good manners and helping but never by her own.

She is daft enough to stick her hand up when the teacher asks who has been in the paper box/paints tray/sink and ends up having to clean it up alone even if she has not made the mess because none of the other kids put their hands up.

[bitter]

TheSecondComing Thu 13-Dec-12 15:18:49

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

No you have not offended TSC smile

I worked in a school where the bottom group where the only ones who ever got any recognition, another where it was always the "naughty ones" so I do understand.

A good teacher should be able to find a way to praise and award every single child.

There must be something no matter how big how small a child has done a good job at and can get recognition.

It is infuriating for me too. DS1 is SEN, was way behind the class, and then suddenly made a massive leap in year 2 and 3 with the help of a nurture group. He has had 2 certificates recognising his achievement. (Which he deserves because he's worked very hard). DS2 is consistantly average, and tries hard in everything. He hasn't got a certificate of merit at all (he's in Y2). He's finding it a bit demoralising and now won't do reading/homework with out a struggle. sad.

diddl Thu 13-Dec-12 15:24:48

I would want the teacher to know that a child had been praised for work that wasn´t hers.

I think I´d leave it at that though.

I can see that it must be upsetting if she´s not getting praise, but tbh, if she´s having a pretty easy ride so far-thank your lucky stars!

complexnumber Thu 13-Dec-12 15:32:19

Sorry, no help at all. But I had pictured a small child going into school with a fake beard and moustache (possibly glasses) so they wouldn't be recognised.

(I actually tried this when I was 7... thanks mum!)

drjohnsonscat Thu 13-Dec-12 15:43:43

I think the OP has had an unduly hard time. My DD's class is overall high achieving. It's just a fact. On average some classes will be less high achieving for many, many reasons. She was just trying to put some context behind her statements and was quick to de-stealth-boast her post.

I wouldn't say anything about this assembly in particular but wait and make sure DD is praised at assembly at some point soon. No need to make it about this particular child getting praise for work that wasn't hers.

diddl Thu 13-Dec-12 15:46:01

Yes, I had to laugh too complex as for some reason when my daughter started the same 2ndry school as her brother, she was known as "the famous xxx"!

youarewinning Thu 13-Dec-12 15:46:45

If it helps and you care?! I got what you meant as a low acheiving cohort. It's not offensive and even OFSTED comment on children entering school largely below, at or above national expectations. People can say what they like but it happens in areas yer on year or as a one off year. My friend teaches year 2 and has always met targets for SAT until last year but looking back at the level the children started and finished year R on was the lowest the school has seen for 6 years she's been there. TBH I think people settled on low acheiving and thought you meant under acheivers but I got or thought you meant! that they started school lower than expected level and thats partly why your DD stands out more not because she's exceptionally bright (although clearly she is wink). Its a shame your attempt to underplay your DD;s abilities have been used as a stick to beat you with.

As for speaking to the teacher, I would. Just say DD was upset as she had written that list. Explain you understand that for DD it may not have been an all singing and dancing assembly piece of work but for a 5yo seeing her friend get praised over for something they did is upsetting. Plus its not fair on the other child when the teacher sudddenly expects this standard of work from her again.

RedHelenB Thu 13-Dec-12 16:53:15

Have you seen the piece of work? How do you know for definite that it's noit the other girl's?

WeWilsonAMerryChristmas Thu 13-Dec-12 17:04:01

But how do you know that only two children can read?

Sneepy Thu 13-Dec-12 17:23:57

Also if your DD is already 5, then she is probably older than the rest of the class. I just don't think you can say "low achieving cohort" and get away with it. Most 4 & 5 yo reception children I know are not free readers yet (DD2 just brought her first reading book home this week) and we are in a "high achieving" area.

I'd have a problem with the school recognizing academic stuff in assembly at this stage when there is such a wide range of abilities at reception stage. Is it a very pushy school?

OutragedAtThePriceOfFreddos Thu 13-Dec-12 17:41:30

I agree that your child is likely to be the oldest in the class if she is already 5 and she has only been at school a term.

You are being precious. There are other ways to praise and recognise good things in children without having to have an assembly about it, and I'm sure your dd is having her fair share of those things.

carocaro Thu 13-Dec-12 18:02:25

"This opinion (and it's not too far off the mark) was arrived at by general conversations with friends"

This makes me slap my hand to my forehead in disbelief. So the 'low cohort/only 2 can read/not far off the mark' has been arrived at my a minority of parents, some of which have nothing to do with the school, who don't actually know for sure and just gossiped in the playground/on a weekend away about it.

The golden rule of school and how not to piss off other parents, teachers and children is to concentrate on your child and your child only and not make up totaly crap about other kids based on hearsay and your own opinions. You seriously all talked about this on your weekend away?

You can shout it from the rooftops about how well your child is doing but certainly not at the expense of others, of whom you actually know very little. How would you think other parents would feel if they knew you had deemed their children 'low-cohorts'? Would you like it if you had found out they had called your daughter something horrible eg: bright but dull/can read but can barely socialise, must be low self esteem/self worth? Not pleasant at all. You will, if you try, make some great friendships with Mums at school and you all be worth your weight in gold to each other, helping each other out, sharing the experience together etc etc, so try not to be so narrow minded and opinionated and you might actually enjoy it instead of being hooked up on stats!

JoanByers Thu 13-Dec-12 18:05:48

You know that they rotate these 'star of the week' prizes? Everyone gets one.

All must have prizes.

It doesn't mean anything.

AvonCallingBarksdale Thu 13-Dec-12 18:15:13

At DD's infants they seem to rotate the star of the week things - they always manage to find something to praise pupils for. FWIW, I could read freely before I started at school (preen), but I can safely say that I'm not any more advanced a reader than my peers now! Is DD your first child, OP? It's unusual for kids to be free readers in reception, so she's obviously doing well, but they all catch up in the end, even the "low-achieving cohort" wink

lljkk Thu 13-Dec-12 18:45:24

yanbu. I dont' see why you wouldn't inform the teacher about the mis-attributed piece of work, or that your DD was feeling put out. But you might be U if you expect anything in particular to happen on back of it. So have to help your DD to deal with small disappointments. See the things she has rather than the things she hasn't.

TheSecondComing Thu 13-Dec-12 18:53:17

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

lljkk Thu 13-Dec-12 18:57:23

TSC: just hide the thread. It's doing you no good at all.

Oh, but read my post first, I'm sure it was reasonably wise. wink

cloutiedumpling Thu 13-Dec-12 19:05:41

They may use the "shout out" to encourage kids who, for whatever reason, are thought to need encouragement. I've heard of such a system being used to try to encourage good behaviour. This does seem to dishearten the kids at the school who are quiet and get on with their work, but also seems to prevent disruptive behaviour too so I suppose it benefits everyone in the long run.

TheSecondComing Thu 13-Dec-12 19:15:21

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DeWe Thu 13-Dec-12 19:23:34

Actually I think it would be sensible to have a quick word with the teacher. If the teacher had given a sticker in class then I'd leave it though.

Thing is, if they teacher tends to give every child a turn, it could be their only certificate, and I think it could make a child feel rather bad to have their only certificate for someone else's work. Also some teachers might well look at other work the child has done and think "that's not up to the previous standard, and not reward them for something they've worked hard on.

I'd say something along the lines of "Please don't make a fuss about it, but the "Anna's list" was actually done by my dd." I wouldn't particularly want my dd to get the certificate, or the other child to lose it though. I wouldn't say anything about the certificate.

RillaBlythe Thu 13-Dec-12 19:26:26

Anna's Christmas list? hmm

Thing is if they are only doing these assemblies once a fortnight, dd only has had, what, 8 chances of being mentioned, & that is if they single out someone from every class each time. Is this whole school or just infants?

Timetoask Thu 13-Dec-12 19:26:54

I would talk to the teacher about your dd not being recognised in assembly (for over a year). The school might think that because she is doing so well her confidence doesn't need to be nurtured.

lljkk Thu 13-Dec-12 19:26:59

I'd probably be a happier person if I too could transfer some of my perceived MN Twattishness to Real Life.

TheSecondComing Thu 13-Dec-12 19:28:13

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DonkeysInTheStableAtMidnight Thu 13-Dec-12 19:28:24

You're not a massive twat or even a bit of one, maybe it was risky putting aibu and v precious in your thread title. Hope DD2 gets her day in the sun very soon OP.

CaliforniaSucksSnowballs Thu 13-Dec-12 19:30:01

Aww poor kid credit for her work being given to someone else.
I'd buy her a cake and celebrate at home with her and give her your sympathy for not getting recognised. Maybe mention it quietly to the teacher if you get a chance but I wouldn't make a huge deal of it.

RillaBlythe Thu 13-Dec-12 19:30:55

I know it's you! Just noticing the name, where did you get that from? grin

Veggies eh - cant trust them.

plantsitter Thu 13-Dec-12 19:32:51

I can imagine how pissed off I'd be if someone else was given a prize for my work! I don't think there's anything wrong with showing your DD you will stick up for her (and therefore she is allowed to stick up for herself - no reason girls should pretend to be less bright than they are just so they don't cause a fuss).

Narked Thu 13-Dec-12 19:33:12

Talk to the school. If your DD is in reception and having lessons with Yr2 the chances are she's falling through the cracks when it comes to recognising her efforts. All children need to feel encouraged, regardless of ability.

Onebadbackandalostpelvicfloor Thu 13-Dec-12 19:35:07

I totally sympathise with you OP and its always the bright, well behaved ones who go unrecognised. I have a y3 child who is doing y6 level literacy and maths and is, as described at parents evening, "an exceptional child" yet this has never been recognised within any school reward system.

My child is very pissed off about it, especially as little joe in the corner who is a brat gets rewarded at every assembly for sitting still for 5mins. They cannot rationalise that they are doing everything asked of them and getting no recognition but behave like a toad and you get heaps of praise.

Schools piss me right off.

InNeedOfBrandyButter Thu 13-Dec-12 19:41:05

I know in our school the star of the week was rotated and nothing to do with who had been doing their best that week in reception. Now in Yr1 and 2 it's still evened out fairly so every dc will get it at least once but it's also more whta they are doing to earn it to.

Does your dd do any outside clubs? In my dc's school any certs/medals/badges they can bring in on a friday and get clapped in assembly along with the star of the week (1 in each class) and then the head teacher award (1 child in the whole school) which doesn't get handed about willy nilly. my wonderful pfb got it once was so proud

TheSecondComing Thu 13-Dec-12 19:42:45

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Rudolphstolemycarrots Thu 13-Dec-12 19:45:07

Tell the teacher that 'I just had to laugh during assembly when they were holding up my DD's letter/drawing and rewarding other girl for something she didn't do. It was so funny but at the same time DD was v upset' . And let the teacher sort it out.

IWishIWasSheRa Thu 13-Dec-12 19:50:21

I agree with onebadback I have a yr2 dd and she does well tries her best and for the past few years has struggled to understand why she has 2 stars and the difficult child in the class has 30.
I also feel for the teacher who is having to use the stars to reward behaviour that should be expected- but I now put myself in the shoes of the other childs mum- anything that helps the other child modify his behaviour is a blessing! I explain to my dd when she queries it that "he needs more help behaving the way you know how to, but the teacher knows how well you are doing and you should be proud of yourself' I once considered speaking to previous teachers about lack of recognition for good work but then played them at their own game- when dd got a star I wrote in her contact book how much it had meant to her and how she was going to try extra hard to earn some more!

I have friends who are teachers and they hate the star system but my dds teacher is very fair this year and the difference is amazing- she really does have a knack of rewarding great behaviour and work- but I think she is the exception and the best we can do in future is to help our kids be self motivated by their effort and attainment!

kinkyfuckery Thu 13-Dec-12 20:20:15

So let me get this straight, the teacher isn't aware that someone else (your DD) did the other child's work? And the other child was rewarded on that work? And noone has told the teacher, but you're pissed off that she's not psychic?

TheSecondComing Thu 13-Dec-12 20:31:30

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

RedHelenB Fri 14-Dec-12 07:27:42

s a teacher & a parent I think you are so wrong about bright well behaved children not getting recognition - they are always the ones that get picked for special things, get speaking roles in plays etc. It's the quiet middle of the road plodders that are more likely to get overlooked ime.

Meglet Fri 14-Dec-12 07:42:53

They don't rotate Star of the Week. DS is in Y1 now and hasn't got a thing since he started school. No present boxes, class certificates, nothing. He's not 'under the radar' and is doing really well in reading and maths.

<Very bitter and will be speaking to his teacher in the new year>.

RedHelenB Fri 14-Dec-12 08:10:50

30 children in a class & maybe 13 weeks of term, so more than half a class will not have got star of the week!!!

diddl Fri 14-Dec-12 08:27:53

Surely the other parents would want to know that the little girl has been praised/rewarded for work that isn´t hers?

ApplesinmyPocket Fri 14-Dec-12 08:55:40

Hello TSC, was it you who gave me my best-ever laugh on MN? 'Your minge, I can see your minge!' (apols if I've remembered it wrong. Though it would be quite funny given the topic if I'd given you credit for a quip that wasn't yours! grin

As for the Christmas list, I totally understand how you feel, perfectly natural, we feel so much for our DC when there's an injustice like this. I'd absolutely be tempted to say something to the teacher on the lines of some of the good suggestions on here. HOWever, I do think it's one of those occasions where you might eventually feel relieved that you DIDN'T say anything. I think it might make you look a bit sour and spoilsporty, unfair though that is. I can imagine the teacher rather dismissing it but giving you a sort of mental tick on a list you don't want to be on (I could be quite wrong!) Isn't it one of those occasions you will look back on and think 'I'm glad I didn't say anything, with hindsight...phew'?

Your clever little DD2 not getting a certificate is, as you say, a different matter and I don't think it's unreasonable to gently hope aloud at some parent-teacher meeting that your DD is full of anticipation that she has worked hard and might soon be in the running, almost with a laugh - 'you know what kids are like!' - if time goes on and it looks like she really has been overlooked.

Bless her, I like the sound of her imagination - being the Christmas Elf!

diddl Fri 14-Dec-12 09:25:55

"I can imagine the teacher rather dismissing it but giving you a sort of mental tick on a list you don't want to be on"

The teacher wouldn´t want to know that she gave credit to a child for work that wasn´t hers??

RedHelenB Fri 14-Dec-12 09:32:15

Noit really, it will soon be apparent what child does what. And if op hasn't seen the work im question how can she be sure that the child did not put pen to paper.

diddl Fri 14-Dec-12 09:35:28

It may well have been a joint effort-in which case one getting no recognition is still shit.

I´d have to say something.

TheSecondComing Fri 14-Dec-12 09:53:52

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

I think YANBU to mention quietly to the teacher that the work was in fact your daughters but I wouldn't make a big deal out of it.
I also wouldn't panic about the 'recognition' for your daughter, my dd's school ensure throughout the year that all children get at least 1 certificate in the year. I know this as this happened to my dd last year grin
I shall add though that when my dd started school she couldn't read does that put her in the 'fairly low achieving cohort' or just make me a shit parent?

TheSecondComing Fri 14-Dec-12 10:27:09

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Oh I'm not taking offence i was just wondering as let's face it my dd is a genius now grin haha kidding if she shut up for 5 minutes there might be some hope!!
I would maybe mention to the teacher that all children are not being recognised for their achievements despite how fabulous these might be, iyswim.

KurriKurri Fri 14-Dec-12 12:10:36

I think if you are bothered by this, and your DD is bothered (and that's very understandable - the mix up over the Christmas list would feel like a very big injustice at her age) then you should say something - it shows your DD you will fight her corner if she's upset.

If you go in tactfully, point out the mistake (but don't make a huge issue of it) and say you are concerned your DD is not getting the rewards when she is trying v. hard, - what does she need to do to in her work to merit an award etc etc (i.e go in with the attitude of you and the teacher between you, tackling a problem) then I don't think they will think you are a loon. (And actually it doesn't really matter if they do - what matters is that you feel you want to do something, so you should do it.)

good luck smile

MummytoKatie Fri 14-Dec-12 13:11:52

So your dd is working at Year 2 level and she did a piece of work for her friend that is working at Year R level? Well - it's no wonder her friend got praised!

Not sure what the right thing to do here is. Maybe mention to the teacher without turning it into a big drama.

However, I think that is minor in comparison to the fact that this may not be the right school for your dd. There are two possibilities here - one is that your dd is genuinely gifted. The other is that she is a very bright little girl who appears gifted in the context of the school.

If it is the second then there may be another school where she would be able to stay in her own class for lessons. Or maybe move to Y1 rather than Y2. Which has to be a better situation from a general "happy at school" point of view.

TheSecondComing Fri 14-Dec-12 13:31:47

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

upstart68 Fri 14-Dec-12 21:35:03

I kind of see this from the other side.

My dd is good at some things, not so good at others. Recently she scraped into an extention group. She worked in a team one day and they won the prize. I asked her were your answers right? No she said but A and B's were (the other team members). I got mine all wrong.

So she didn't deserve the prize but it gave her a chance to feel what winning felt like. She's been in school three years and never been picked for anything and never won a prize. She was so happy and so proud.

Yours will win loads of prizes - give it time. But don't make a fuss and take the joy away from this other dc.

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