10 week old being taken to Scotland for 3days

(117 Posts)
DillyDallyDayDream Tue 11-Dec-12 22:10:40

Posting for a friend

Her MIL (they have a shit relationship) is demanding she takes my friends 10 week old away to Scotland for 3days. She's saying no as the distance is quite big (would travel from South east England).

Who's being unreasonable my friend or her mil?

Fairyegg Tue 11-Dec-12 22:11:48

Mil. It's fine if the babies mum is ok with it. If she's not, she's not and therefore it doesn't happen.

MIL is demanding that she (the MIL?) take the baby to Scotland? Away from the baby's mum? Or demanding that the mum take the baby to Scotland?

Either way, who the fuck gets to 'demand' this? On what grounds?

Ameybee Tue 11-Dec-12 22:12:51

MIL being seriously unreasonable - not her baby & no right x

DillyDallyDayDream Tue 11-Dec-12 22:13:48

Her MIL is demanding that she (the MIL) takes the baby

Katienana Tue 11-Dec-12 22:13:55

The mil is being ridiculous. No one has the right to take a baby from it's mother. It would be cruel. Ds is 10 wks tomorrow I cannot imagine anyone taking him.away from me...they would find it easier to rip my arm off tbh.

Hahahhahahahah.

No.

The end.

GrimAndHumourlessAndEven Tue 11-Dec-12 22:16:52

er no

the baby should be with mother

ChaoticforlifenotjustChristmas Tue 11-Dec-12 22:17:37

MIL is BVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVU

ItsAllGoingToBeFine Tue 11-Dec-12 22:17:56

No. She would still be being unreasonable if mum was allowed to stay with baby.

What does her DH say about it, surely he would tell his Mum to get to fuck. Her MIL has no right to demand anything even if they had a brilliant relationship.

WeAreSix Tue 11-Dec-12 22:19:25

Absolutely not!!! No way would I allow my mil to do that (not that she would!)

pictish Tue 11-Dec-12 22:19:49

Nope. Not her baby, not her call.

ZhenThereWereTwo Tue 11-Dec-12 22:20:18

Clearly the MIL.

Say No, if she continues f off should work.

Stuffingballs Tue 11-Dec-12 22:20:20

How can she demand to take the baby?

She can ask and your friend can say no. The End.

JiltedJohnsJulie Tue 11-Dec-12 22:20:30

Yes, just what does her DP have to say about this?

duletty Tue 11-Dec-12 22:20:56

Eh? Mil is suggesting she removes a baby from its mother..DIL....to the other end of the country for 3 days? Why on earth would would anyone suggest such a thing?? Trying to rack my brain to think of a senario where this would be a helpful suggestion, but can't comeup with any.

I did however get on a plane with dd at three wks to do a whistle stop tour of my relatives in scotland for a few days as I had just a small carry on bag with a few things but who would want to separate a baby from a mum?

What does your friends dh make of this?

Pozzled Tue 11-Dec-12 22:21:27

No. MIL is being ridiculous.

Many (most?) mums wouldn't be happy to leave a 10 week old overnight just down the road. To demand to take a baby that young miles away is just mad.

madbengal Tue 11-Dec-12 22:21:54

No way MIL is nuts

Smellslikecatspee Tue 11-Dec-12 22:22:53

Ha ha ha ha

I don't have DC and I still think that's nuts.

FFS I did leave my 10 week old kittens for half that length.

She (MIL) has no right to demand anything.

What's her (ops friend) OH/DH saying?

MrsTerrysChocolateOrange Tue 11-Dec-12 22:23:24

MIL is being so U that she has almost done a quantum and gone through to R again. I hope DIL and her DH told her to fuck off.

CaptainVonTrapp Tue 11-Dec-12 22:24:24

You're joking right? The MIL is BU.

DillyDallyDayDream Tue 11-Dec-12 22:24:26

The trip is to see my friends DPs step family.
Her DP is saying yeh let mum take her, she's a social worker so it will all be ok

Smellslikecatspee Tue 11-Dec-12 22:24:32

*i didn't leave my kittens for half that time

Really need to proof read. .

squeakytoy Tue 11-Dec-12 22:25:24

unreal... I wouldnt even have expected to have my grandaughter overnight at that age unless specifically asked by her parents. I certainly would not have demanded it, or even thought of taking her away anywhere.. madness!

MrsTerrysChocolateOrange Tue 11-Dec-12 22:26:13

What does being a SW have to do with it? A good SW would know that this is unacceptable. I will ring all the people I used to work with at SS and ask them. Let's pretend I did because all of them would say the MIL is BU.

CabbageLeaves Tue 11-Dec-12 22:26:26

No way.

MiL is wrong to 'demand' and DP is a twat for not recognising how ridiculous it is unless the child's mother is happy with it

FromGirders Tue 11-Dec-12 22:26:35

Hahahahaha
Nope. Would never happen. MiL does not get to say what happens to a baby any time, let alone when baby is ten weeks old!!!

NervousAt20 Tue 11-Dec-12 22:26:38

Mil is BU. and as for the demanding? WTF I would be telling her where to get off

FromGirders Tue 11-Dec-12 22:27:30

And DP would be wearing his testicles as earrings!

Friend needs to grow a pair and tell MIL to fuck right off! MIL is probably trying to rekindle her old feelings of being a new mum and wants baby all to her greedy self.

Smellslikecatspee Tue 11-Dec-12 22:27:38

Just seen your last post if I were your friend I would be seriously thinking about my relationship.

As for MIL being a social worker, well then surely she should be aware of the needs of a young baby and its need to be close to its mother/ main care giver.

steppemum Tue 11-Dec-12 22:28:21

Mil is unreasonable.

baby should not be separated from mum for 3 days at this age. Totally inappropriate, baby is still bonding. The baby would be distressed unless MIL has lots of daily contact with the baby now.

I am guessing she isn't breastfeeding. If she is then it is impossible as baby needs to stay with mum to feed.

I have argued before on threads about mums being so precious that their dps are not allowed to take the baby away for an hour/day, but that is the baby's dad, and only for a few hours.

Just feel the need to say it again

Ab so lu tely NO Way!!!

CaptainVonTrapp Tue 11-Dec-12 22:28:24

I don't care what her job is but I don't believe a SW would 'demand' this of a 5 weeks old baby.

'Her partner' says it will be ok??? What's her partner got to do with it?

DillyDallyDayDream Tue 11-Dec-12 22:28:53

I said exactly the same Mrs Terry's. The MIL IS a spiteful bitch anyway

GentlyGentlyOhDear Tue 11-Dec-12 22:29:01

Ridiculous! What is it with all of the entitled MIL threads at the minute?!

A social worker should know better than to suggest such a thing as well!

ArtexTheHallWithBoughsOfMonkey Tue 11-Dec-12 22:29:48

What a bizarre demand. Why would a mil want to take a baby that wasn't hers? In what way would the baby benefit? What is up with all these insane baby stealing mils lately? Is it a Thing they're advising in Bella?

I can see why your friend has a shit relationship with mil. Mil is a monster. Your friend should tell her to get stuffed. Same goes for 'D'P if he doesn't get his head out of his backside.

MrsTerrysChocolateOrange Tue 11-Dec-12 22:33:46

Good for you Dilly. Now is the time for your friend to channel her inner tiger/bear/<choose protective animal of choice>. She will need to learn to say no in a way that people will understand. She is now a Mother and will need to protect her LO from this really very odd person.

DoingitOnTheRoofTopWithSanta Tue 11-Dec-12 22:33:50

A good SW would know that this is unacceptable.

Yes, that^

Your friend is insane if she starts letting MIL get away with that sort of shit now. I hope your friend is not breast feeding, as that would make the MIL unreasonable times a fucking billion

propertyNIGHTmareBEFOREXMAS Tue 11-Dec-12 22:36:38

The mil needs to become an estranged mil ASAP. Why oh why does your friend even need to consider if she is being unreasonable. What madness.

propertyNIGHTmareBEFOREXMAS Tue 11-Dec-12 22:40:10

MrsTerry, to be honest it is situations like this they the phrase 'fuck off' was invented for. The DIL needs to repeat the expletive liberally as required grin

MrsTerrysChocolateOrange Tue 11-Dec-12 22:42:36

Agreed, property, agreed. grin

DillyDallyDayDream Tue 11-Dec-12 22:55:17

She's said no and told mil to do 1 but mil keeps coming back even more demanding

shock

a child that age should not be away from its mum... regardless of who is asking to have them.

scotland? for 3days? blooming madness!!

PuggyMum Tue 11-Dec-12 23:00:11

Tell your friend that...

'No is a complete sentence'

She will soon have this as her mantra with her mil!

gimmecakeandcandy Tue 11-Dec-12 23:00:38

Ffs what is it with all these cuntish mils I keep reading about lately? Tell your mate to tell her to fuck off to the far side of fuck and stay there.

JiltedJohnsJulie Tue 11-Dec-12 23:05:07

Well mil can demand but agree your friend needs to tell her to FUCK OFF.

RayanneGraff Tue 11-Dec-12 23:05:56

The MIL is unreasonable, to a staggering extent. Think you will get a MN consensus on this one.

maddening Tue 11-Dec-12 23:09:52

Mil is vu

DonkeysInTheStableAtMidnight Tue 11-Dec-12 23:13:52

Bonkers, not going to happen. Back up your friend fgs, this really isn't acceptable. Where is DP in all this, is he a man or a mouse? Sad if this relationship ends over MIL playing greedy granny over the 10 week old.

NonnoMum Tue 11-Dec-12 23:14:26

When I read these post about loony MiLs, I always want to ask how well the MiL's boobs work...

gallicgirl Tue 11-Dec-12 23:21:01

I'm guessing the MIL is being demanding from the other end of the phone.

Hang up.

Job done.

flow4 Wed 12-Dec-12 00:00:52

Oh I dunno, maybe the MIL has a point...

Naaaah, ONLY JOKING! grin

Just thought I should try and introduce a bit of variety grin... We don't normally all agree on AIBU... But the MiL is soooooo U that I don't think you're going to get a single dissenting voice!

blackeyedsusan Wed 12-Dec-12 00:06:57

flow 4... i was going to say..." but she is the child's grandmther... " ...
so tell her to fuck off no, no, no NO

What ATruth said. Her exact words.

CoolaYuleA Wed 12-Dec-12 00:32:05

MIL is being totally unreasonable - at 10 weeks the longest I left DD was to have a bath whilst she was in bed.

As another way of telling her fuck OFF no, how is she planning on getting the baby there? Babies under six months should not be in a carseat for more than 2 hours. Even flying to Scotland, with drives at either end this is likely to be too long. If they are driving it's no chance from a health/safety perspective.

Although I would just go with a) "Fuck off". And no competent SW would ever suggest that this is acceptable.

zipzap Wed 12-Dec-12 00:38:55

I would tell the MIL that of course she can take her gc to scotland for a few days once they are ready for it. Which won't be until about August 13th 2027 at the very earliest.

That way you are saying yes - but not yet. While you say No she can argue back as she is obviously a loon. If you say that she can but only once the child is ready then she is being the unreasonable one as she wants to take it before it is ready.

I'd also seriously consider reporting the MIL to SS - yes, I know she is a SW. But if she thinks that it is right to take a perfectly fine baby away from its mum at 10 weeks and subject it to two very long drives in a few days then she shouldn't be...

Narked Wed 12-Dec-12 00:42:50

'She's a social worker'

I wouldn't care if she's Mary-fucking-Poppins, taking a 10 week old away from their mother - who doesn't want them to go - for three days, hundreds of miles away is an utterly fuckwittish idea.

MrsTerrysChocolateOrange Wed 12-Dec-12 01:00:38

Narked that is so weird. My nickname in the homeless shelter I worked in was Mary-fucking-Poppins. Coined by a lovely lady who was very proud she had come up with it. Since I am the original Mary-fucking-Poppins I can tell you that, NO, even I shouldn't be taking a 10 week old to Scotland.

piprabbit Wed 12-Dec-12 01:03:43

I must have the baby... or else...

Or else what exactly - what is the MiL threatening to do that could possible force the OPs friend to change her mind?

Lawabidingmama Wed 12-Dec-12 01:10:29

Flip me absolutely mental!! At 10 weeks old I wouldn't have let my mil take my baby round the block for ten minutes (or anyone else) I actually can't believe this is being suggested! My eldest DD is nearly 3 and if my mil or DM for that matter asked to take her anywhere for 3 days I would not hesitate in saying no! Crikey o Reilly! This is very bizarre!

myfirstkitchen Wed 12-Dec-12 01:47:08

no-one would take my 10 week old baby away from me, regardless of what degree they have!

CSIJanner Wed 12-Dec-12 03:27:49

What Zipzap said.

deleted203 Wed 12-Dec-12 03:47:56

Fucking hell! It's an insane suggestion. Tell her to fuck off, she's mad.

DeafLeopard Wed 12-Dec-12 06:06:03

Not that you need it as there are so many, but another YANBU from me

jaggythistle Wed 12-Dec-12 06:19:30

MIL is being ridiculously unreasonable.

if Scottish family want to see tiny baby that much, they can come and visit. FFS.

jaggythistle Wed 12-Dec-12 06:30:26

also mine are 8 months and 3 and have never been away overnight. 10 weeks!

sleepybump Wed 12-Dec-12 06:31:04

Be strong for your friend, it's got to be fuckin horrible being pressured by your partner & his mother. Your friend is absolutely right to say no, and keep saying no, don't even let her give in to betweeny-options ("well if I can't take her to scotland, I'll have her at mine overnight..." etc etc)... I couldn't even understand why PIL would want to take my baby into another room to coo over her at that age let alone let them take her away from me! lol - She's now 14months and has never been away from either me or her dad - Neither of us could have her go away overnight anywhere yet either! (she's not ready to be away from us, let alone me mental state at having her be away!)

be strong for her x

sleepybump Wed 12-Dec-12 06:33:09

ps jaggythistle has it spot on...

Why are family not visiting her if they want to meet the new arrival?? That's the NORMAL thing to do...

waterrat Wed 12-Dec-12 06:45:22

I have only just left my 7 month old for one night - with his dad, in his own home and it was really weird being away for so long - and he was unsettled by it. At 10 weeks I had just about left him for long enough to get my hair cut.

The dad is the wierd one in all of this.

DillyDallyDayDream Wed 12-Dec-12 20:22:15

Update:

Mil though it be ok for friends was DP (split up over this and many other things the mil does) to take the baby so booked flights,

You and your DP have split up?

And MIL booked the flights for your baby anyway?

Is that right or did I misread?

LynetteScavo Wed 12-Dec-12 20:29:46

The MIL can go take a running jump.

She's being beyond unreasonable.

Tell her to come back when the child is ten years old.

CatchingMockingbirds Wed 12-Dec-12 20:31:52

hmm I don't think anyone would be ok with their mil taking their 10wk old away for a 3 day holiday without them, nevermind if they don't even get on! Let her waste her money on flights, your friend doesn't have to give her baby to the mil.

LemonBreeland Wed 12-Dec-12 20:35:48

The MIL would need identification to take the baby on a plane anyway. And a letter from the parents allowing it to fly, couldbe quite tricky.

No way would a 10wk old baby be going anywhere without me if I was it's Mother. And 3 days! Not a chance she would even babysit for a few hours after this if it was me.

Rudolphstolemycarrots Wed 12-Dec-12 21:43:13

MIL is selfish and bonkers! Who on earth would separate a baby from it's mother? Being a social worker is meaningless by the way. The social worker is not the babies mother!

At the end of the day they can't just take the baby against mothers will. She could easily get the police involved and call it kidnap.

Can you let your friend see this thread? She must stay strong.

Rudolphstolemycarrots Wed 12-Dec-12 21:44:17

The MIL is only thinking of her needs - her need to show then baby off etc. The MIL is not thinking of the baby's needs at all. The baby is most happy with it's mum.

malinois Wed 12-Dec-12 21:50:03

@LemonBreeland: erm, no. Scotland isn't independent yet. She would need no more identification or letter from parents than she needs to get on a bus or train.

BadPoet Wed 12-Dec-12 21:54:44

@malinois, not true, id is needed for domestic flights, for most children the simplest is a passport.

Really shocked a SW would even think this was in any way reasonable.

If the exDP is happy with it though he will provide a letter and the birth certificate it doesn't have to come from the mother does it. OP is your friends ex having the baby around that time at all?

flow4 Wed 12-Dec-12 22:01:44

So this is an exDP and his mother? Not even a dad the baby lives with?! shock

This is so ridiculous it might almost be funny... Almost...

timeforachangebaby Wed 12-Dec-12 22:04:07

so the dad is going as well, and this is for the baby to meet its half siblings.

I was prepared with my "fuck the fuck off" statement, how much time does this "dad" spend with the baby.

Hang on - I see a scenario here. The 'friend' and dp are separated? Does the ex dp have the dc on his own for any length of time. Eg instead of 3 days at dads, mil is thinking 3 days in scotland? Slightly less weird.

midori1999 Wed 12-Dec-12 22:15:54

The MIL is so unreasonable that all of AIBU thinks she is. That's about as unreasonable as you can get an then some, surely?

So your friend has now split from her partner over this? Blimey! Although I can't say I blame her. Her MIL is ridiculous. Her ex partner is ridiculous. Please support your friend to stand up to these idiots.

flow4 Wed 12-Dec-12 22:19:32

Notactually, a 10 week old baby isn't likely to have over-night contact with dad, surely?

timeforachangebaby Wed 12-Dec-12 22:20:48

I know someone who has shared overnight contact with their baby, 4 nights her, 3 nights him, since birth, personally I think its too much too soon, but it works for them.

Not saying this person should but it does happen.

flow4 Wed 12-Dec-12 22:22:22

Gosh. I could never have done that. But then DS1 never had a single night away from me until he was 4.9, and I was in hospital having his bro!

I don't know! Friends left their six week old overnight with pils. Mine were in sight for the first oooooh six years of their lives, so I don't know what less paranoid parents do grin

jaggythistle Wed 12-Dec-12 22:37:59

my B and SIL left their DD overnight at 6 weeks too, after being out for the evening without her at 3 weeks. they also left her behind with gps to attend a family funeral at the other end of the UK at about 3-4 months and raved to us about their great nights sleep.

we were somewhat hmm as we chose to take our pfb with us. (don't worry he slept through the service and no one noticed him smile )

he also went out to restaurants etc with us too, i was happy to have him there. it's when they get mobile that a relaxing night out with dc asleep in pram gets harder ime!

CatchingMockingbirds Wed 12-Dec-12 23:06:17

You still need a passport to get a plane to Scotland. I've needed a passport for both me and my son when travelling from Scotland to other parts of the UK and back again.

Chubfuddler Wed 12-Dec-12 23:11:21

Still a no from me. A non resident dad wouldn't have overnight contact with a ten week old. Three days hundreds of miles away is so off the scale unreasonable its laughable. No no no.

CatPussRoastingOnAnOpenFire Wed 12-Dec-12 23:14:12

Photo ID for travel to Scotland.
Anyway...NO. End of! MIL needs to do one!

DillyDallyDayDream Thu 13-Dec-12 21:20:52

The baby's dad doesn't have any regular contact with bAby, he would rather see his mates - that's another thread! Never had baby over night

Friend has read this thread, resulted in her telling mil to piss off, etc etc

CatPussRoastingOnAnOpenFire Thu 13-Dec-12 21:30:34

Good for your friend! Now stay strong. x

YouOldTinsellySlag Thu 13-Dec-12 21:36:50

No need for the Dad to have any overnight contact at 10 weeks- even a judge would be understanding of that.

What is it with these strange MILs who want to treat GCs as their own baby and upset their DILs? There seem to be a lot of threads about this lately.

What worries me the most is that the DPs/DHs aren't putting their foot down and saying "it's a NO and you're upsetting my wife/partner by asking"

Obviously in the case of OP's friend, they split up over it and I am pretty sure my reaction would have been the same had DH sided with his mother over anything similar.

YouOldTinsellySlag Thu 13-Dec-12 21:38:41

Maybe your friend should have a legal document drawn up OP, just to ensure that the baby has no overnight stays with MIL or is taken on a plane etc.

If the exDP can't be bothered much, she might be in a stronger position to assert her rights as the Resident Parent.

ChasedByBees Thu 13-Dec-12 21:38:43

No no no no no. DD is 10mo and I haven't had a night away from her. There's no way I'm ready to let anyone babysit overnight.

izzyizin Thu 13-Dec-12 21:55:59

she's a social worker so it will all be ok

Ye gods. Another professional who is not fit to practice needs vocational guidance.

DillyDallyDayDream Thu 13-Dec-12 22:02:13

My friend is trying to see a solicitor to get something drawn up stating that the baby can not be taken out of the county we live in by them & no overnights with them

YouOldTinsellySlag Thu 13-Dec-12 22:15:01

That's good OP, a sensible action by your friend.

izzyizin Thu 13-Dec-12 22:15:08

Sounds as if your friend may need to apply for a residence order.

In the meantime she can tell the exMIL to do one as grandparents have no legal right to contact/overnight stays etc, and tell her ex to man up and start putting the needs of his dd before those of his dm.

peaceandlovebunny Thu 13-Dec-12 22:30:45

no.
that's the word. use it.

2rebecca Thu 13-Dec-12 22:42:14

One good thing about breast feeding is that it avoids crap like this with young babies.
If she is no longer with her ex then she could have very little to do with his mother, if they were never married then she doesn't really have a relationship with this woman. Her child will have a relationship with her as she gets older but the more this woman demands the less she is likely to see of the baby. She needs to get her son asking for access and sort out seeing her through him not getting aggressive with the child's mother.
I think if she is thinking the child will never have overnights with her father she is being unrealistic. You have a child with a man you share parenting.

fuckwittery Thu 13-Dec-12 22:59:53

BOTH parents (assuming Dad is named on the birth certificate and has parental responsibility) have to consent to a child being removed from the jurisdiction of England and Wales. It is a criminal offence of child abduction otherwise. I am just a bit worried that Dad will have contact or somehow contrive to allow MIL to take the child to Scotland. If so, and they manage to get the child away from her then your friend should call the police. Doesn't matter if the child is with its Dad, if there is a threat of removal from the country the police should assist.

fuckwittery Thu 13-Dec-12 23:00:57

the pressure of wanting to take the baby to scotland is a very good reason not to allow overnights at the moment

YouOldTinsellySlag Fri 14-Dec-12 08:12:28

I think if she is thinking the child will never have overnights with her father she is being unrealistic. You have a child with a man you share parenting. I agree as a father he has equal rights, although she has said he is more interested in going out with his friends than seeing the baby.

However, she could certainly say no to overnights during the first year and I am sure that will b accepted by a court.

Mytimewillcome Fri 14-Dec-12 08:50:51

Is it something to do with the time of the year or something? This is the 3rd thread I've seen about a bonkers MIL demanding to take away a small baby from their mother. It is absolutely outrageous. If her DH can't support her then your friend needs to come back to her with such force that it will leave her MIL knowing exactly what her place is. Your friend is not being unreasonable her MIL is. God it makes me fume!

Mytimewillcome Fri 14-Dec-12 08:54:01

Sorry just read that they had split up. So as your friend isn't going to be around she decides to make decisions about the baby. I hope her MIL and her son/husband (because that's what he is) will be very happy together and leave the mothering to the mother!

Tailtwister Fri 14-Dec-12 08:56:05

10 weeks is far to young for a baby to be away from it's mother (unless it's unavoidable of course). The MIL needs to back off and your friend is right to refuse.

Mytimewillcome Fri 14-Dec-12 09:09:27

She's a social worker?! Sounds like a crap one! I wonder what her colleagues would think if they heard what she wanted to do.

pigletmania Fri 14-Dec-12 09:24:21

Omg your MIL is toxic and nasty. Yes go to a solicitor and call te police if she turns up, if she tries to snatch your baby tats abduction.

Mytimewillcome Fri 14-Dec-12 09:27:31

Also say to your friend that if she allows this it won't just stop there. Once the MIL is allowed to do this she will think that she can take the baby whenever she wants.

flow4 Fri 14-Dec-12 13:47:13

Just to emphasise that the baby has a right to see her father, not vice versa... 'Little and often' is generally considered best. A reasonable arrangement would be 1-2 hours 3 or 4 times a week. And a non-resident father of a 10 week old baby would reasonably be expected to come to the baby, not to take it away somewhere. Parental responsibility does not have any bearing on this situation: whatever the father's legal status, contact must always be in the interests of the child, not at the convenience or request of the parent. hmm Taking a baby away from its mother to stay for 3 nights with a non-resident relatively unknown parents is NOT in the baby's interests. Seeing a solicitor is a good idea, because they can help make this very clear to the ExP and the exMiL.

YouOldTinsellySlag Fri 14-Dec-12 14:38:34

Good advice flow

CabbageLeaves Fri 14-Dec-12 15:56:58

Excellent point made Flow

choccychomp Fri 14-Dec-12 16:11:29

The mil can take photos, send e-mails, use skype (disclaimer - I don't know how this works) she does not need to take the baby. At around 10 weeks I developed post natal depression so there's no way of knowing how mum/baby will feel in a few weeks' time!! Sorry to sound melodramatic but I would have felt like my baby had been kidnapped if someone had taken him/her for more than a couple of hours.

Also -will it really be just 3 days? Does that include travelling time, or will that be even more? What if it snows and flights get cancelled?

Well done for supporting your friend.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now