To want to punch every single noisy opened mouth eater I come across?

(121 Posts)
twinkletoescare Thu 15-Nov-12 16:36:05

Ok maybe not punch BUT DEFO tell them how rude,bad mannered and annoying to anyone within a six mile radius it is?
Kids or elderly I don't's RUDE.

pjmama Thu 15-Nov-12 16:38:22

Disgusting, foul behaviour and worthy of a swift smack in the chops IMO.

Lottapianos Thu 15-Nov-12 16:40:03

Give 'em a punch and then another one from me. Drives me insane. How can they not hear themselves??? angry

Katisha Thu 15-Nov-12 16:40:24

Yanbu and please extend sentiment to gum chewers.

Cortana Thu 15-Nov-12 16:41:29



twinkletoescare Thu 15-Nov-12 16:41:41

Not just me then?!
Omg I literally seeth with rage inside whenever I hear/see them!!
It drives me totally insane! angry

Anniegetyourgun Thu 15-Nov-12 16:42:06

There was a young, well-dressed, nicely made-up woman sitting opposite me in the train once, chewing gum with her mouth open. It was all squelchy. Probably these days, now I'm older and a whole lot horrider, I would actually dare to ask her to close her mouth.

5Foot5 Thu 15-Nov-12 16:42:19

With you on this one.

I suppose with very little children it is to be expected, they have yet to learn. But I am always appalled when you find an adult who does it. I have twice worked with people who were quite uninhibited open mouthed eaters - once I sat opposite one. I just can't understand how they could get to adulthood and not realise that hardly anyone else eats like that. One was a young bloke with a girlfriend - did he never take her out for a meal? How could she stand it?

VirginiaDare Thu 15-Nov-12 16:42:37

should be shot on sight. Vile creatures. And gum poppers should be tortured first.

Teeb Thu 15-Nov-12 16:43:38

Oh my god, you are totally not being unreasonable.

There are certain friends/family members I refuse to sit at the table with. How anyone has let them become an adult who can't even eat properly is beyond me.

DH eats noisily with his mouth closed. I have no idea how he manages it.

StuntGirl Thu 15-Nov-12 17:00:27

My friend is a chomper and lip smacker. I hate it. He does the same thing with chewing gum. Which he chews All The Time. <rage>

DublinMammy Thu 15-Nov-12 17:05:10

Wait until they have finished eating before administering open-handed smack across the chops or risk being splattered....

BatmanLovesHowlingAtTheMoon Thu 15-Nov-12 17:07:40

I can't bear the sound of people eating. I can get through the sound of crunching by distracting myself mentally if they've got their mouths closed (and my DH puts up with me having music on while we're eating) but if they're eating with their mouth open I just want to cry. It's almost a phobia, but makes me feel ill, rather than fear, iyswim.

My friend at uni had several serious girlfriends (not all at once!) but ate everything with his mouth wide open, at top volume. Always made me wonder how good he was in bed grin

Bubblemoon Thu 15-Nov-12 17:09:36

How do people get to adulthood and still eat noisily? Beyond me.

MrsBungleBear Thu 15-Nov-12 17:10:05

Absolutely vile. YANBU.

MrsDeVere Thu 15-Nov-12 17:12:05

not bad op
we have got to about 10 posts and no-one has come on to post 'yabu to suggest violence, are you like this at home? Do you have children? I feel sad for them tbh <sadface>'


SquishyCinnamonSwirls Thu 15-Nov-12 17:12:54

Unless said person has an awful cold and can't breathe and eat at the same time (like me atm!).

TakingTheStairs Thu 15-Nov-12 17:15:24

It drives me mad too, and what is incredibly frustrating is that both my, and my DH's parents have started doing it. Both sets of parents were very strict about making sure their children didn't do while growing up, but now they do it themselves. It's gross.

LimburgseVlaai Thu 15-Nov-12 17:15:56

And add shmacky squelchy slurpy kissers too! Urgh.

louiswalshizzcloset Thu 15-Nov-12 17:16:19

YANBU. It's fucking annoying and disgusting.
YABU if you want to punch my 4yo. He's never quiet and hums when he eats

Another with a DH who eats noisily with mouth fully closed.

MyDaydream Thu 15-Nov-12 17:16:28

How do people get to adulthood and still eat noisily?

They come from families who pass the filthy habit down. It's like feeding time at the zoo when the ILs come over for dinner, I just want to scream "I make enough food for everybody, nobody is leaving the table or getting dessert until I'm finished so slow down and shut your fucking mouths". But they wouldn't hear me over the chewing noises.

twinkletoescare Thu 15-Nov-12 17:16:50

Lol mrsdevere
I was quite expecting that response!
And to anyone who is thinking that....yes I have children...(grown adult children) who were tied up and beaten if they dared to eat with their mouth open... wink

Cahoots Thu 15-Nov-12 17:18:54

YANBU. In fact I don't lie any open mouthed eating not just noisy eating.

Hate it and will discretely leave the room if someone is CHOMPING. Yuk, yuk, yuk!

jjuice Thu 15-Nov-12 17:20:14

Hate it with a vengeance. I make everyone at work suck crisps, and if anyone so much as picks up an apple I have to go to somewhere until it's all gone.

We have a coffee slurper in my office...I have yelled at him on many occasions
don't bloody drink it it's too fucking hot he does it on purpose to wind me up now.

We also have a squirrel in the corner who rustles the paper bag on his breakfast teacake, folding it over and over just enough to take one bite then rustle rustle fold fold. I have phoned the butty shop today and asked them to wrap it in cling film. It was bliss.

I think I may have a problem.

HoneyDragon Thu 15-Nov-12 17:20:45


last thread like this resulted in about 75% of mnet scared of the other 25% though. Hopefully they didn't starve to death grin

Cahoots Thu 15-Nov-12 17:20:57

What about tea slurping?

In my opinion it is not quite as bad but still infuriating.

TheDarkestNight Thu 15-Nov-12 17:21:16

Batman - I feel the same, except all mouth noises make me feel ill and ragey at the same time. I can't deal with beatboxing either, or that clicking noise people make with their tongues. Even thinking about it makes me cringe! Ughhhh at gum, and lip-smacking. Those people should be slowly tortured, and there is a special place in hell for those who do it on public transport.

iseenodust Thu 15-Nov-12 17:22:06

Shall we blame the parents or schools ?

OnwardBound Thu 15-Nov-12 17:25:07

I'm another with a DH who eats noisily with his mouth closed!

I don't know how he manages it. I think it's because he eats very enthusiastically and he has a big nose with large nostrils and the sound becomes somehow amplified?

I tell him he sounds like a labrador eating wet food [and he really does!]

I love my DH very much and he is a wonderful man in so many ways.

But when he eats I just want to punch him. I know how this sounds and I do not advocate DV in any way and would never actually do it....

But I just want him to SHUT THE FUCK UP with the vigorous chewing noise!

twinkletoescare Thu 15-Nov-12 17:31:06

jjuice omg I think we were separated at birth!

iseenodust parents and the school...

Lottapianos Thu 15-Nov-12 17:31:06

Ditto Onward. Love my DP too but his chomping makes me want to reach for sharp tools

OnwardBound So glad it's not just me.

My DH is a noisy eater too sad

He never used to be. Now I want to stab him with a fork at every meal.

wavesandsneezes Thu 15-Nov-12 17:36:06

YANBU. And I would extend that to ANY open mouthed eater regardless of whether or not they are noisy. It is vile. And DS (8) would agree - he finds the sight of food being chewed in an open mouth so bleurgh that he physically vomits most of the time that he witnesses it. Bless him, I have been called into school in the past because he has deposited his just consumed lunch back into his lunch box due to this very thing.

LimburgseVlaai Thu 15-Nov-12 17:37:37

My brother eats like a pig. I used to put my fingers in my ears, take my glasses off and sing loudly. We used to have extremely loud shouting matches.

BonVoyageCharlieBrown Thu 15-Nov-12 17:39:28

My sister does this while I'm speaking to her on the phone. sad

I may not be seeing it but listening to it is far worse!

claraschu Thu 15-Nov-12 17:43:49

My son does this, and it is ruining my relationship with him. I have screamed, nagged, sobbed and begged at every meal for the last 10 years, but he keeps doing it.

cheekydevil Thu 15-Nov-12 17:47:22

My dh makes a noise eating a banana! He closes his mouth but his teeth bang together. Who needs teeth for eat a banana for gawds sake?

OwlLady Thu 15-Nov-12 17:49:55

OP, fuck off and stay at home then is my advice

FellatioNelson Thu 15-Nov-12 17:52:11

Oh god, Yanbu. By BIL is the WORST everrrrr for this, and he is a lip smacker as well. He is a really nice guy but I cannot sit next to, or opposite him when we eat. I wait for him to sit then I go to the furthest point at the table.

shrimponastick Thu 15-Nov-12 17:53:23

Oh yes Cheeky DSS has started eating like that recently. No idea, why. Also seems to have a new habit of blowing on every fucking mouthful.


Lottapianos Thu 15-Nov-12 17:55:14

OwlLady there's no need for that!

twinkletoescare Thu 15-Nov-12 17:56:38

owlLady is obvs a noisy eater. Grosse.

twinkletoescare Thu 15-Nov-12 17:58:08

shrimponastick lol @ the blowing on every mouthful...I've had one that done that!

TremoloGreen Thu 15-Nov-12 17:58:22

Oh gosh.

Can I come and unload here?

I've had this problem my whole life. And Daydream, I identify. ILs are lovely people, but their table manners are appalling. I had to deprogramme DH when we were going out. All gross eating habits make me want to cry. This includes: mixing things together (like rice pudding and jam, this started primary school), licking the lids of yoghurt pots and, if I ever see anyone eat the foam off a cappucino with a spoon, I can never look at them in the same way again.

And, breathe.

OwlLady Thu 15-Nov-12 17:59:34

really am I? maybe I have a very disabled child I have to take out and about into the community who cannot eat nicely and I think some of you are narrow minded and ignorant
maybe that's it instead? hmm but nevermind, carry on with your perfect lives and console yourselves that it's just me

twinkletoescare Thu 15-Nov-12 18:02:48

Yes owlLady of course we all think this applies to people with disabilties,people with false teeth etc etc......
Nobody on here has suggested anything about disabled people?
Do you REALLY think we all sit and judge a disabled child eating with their mouth open?

OwlLady Thu 15-Nov-12 18:03:34

hmm the original post says they don't care if people are elderly

OwlLady Thu 15-Nov-12 18:04:05

and yes actually I do. I have over a decade of experience and yes, people do sit there and judge ALL THE TIME

Cortana Thu 15-Nov-12 18:04:08

<carries on perfect life with a bit of humor and understanding that having a little grrrr moment about someone who is perfectly capable of eating nicely and yet still does not is not an attack on some without the ability to do so for whatever reason>

twinkletoescare Thu 15-Nov-12 18:04:23

Oh sorry...elderly is disabled?

OwlLady Thu 15-Nov-12 18:05:43

you said people with false teeth in your post above mine twinkle, or did you mean people in their 30s with false teeth?

twinkletoescare Thu 15-Nov-12 18:07:50

I have two false teeth from having them knocked out in an accident as a child, my friend is 26 and has a full set of false teeth due to poor dental hygiene from her foster carers.

Don't put your own hang up son me because I'm not interested.

<carries on with perfect life>

Cortana Thu 15-Nov-12 18:08:23

False teeth can impair your ability to eat Owl, Twinkle didn't mention age, you got there yourself. People have false teeth for lots of reasons.

DublinMammy Thu 15-Nov-12 18:09:07

And people who answer the phone by clearing their throat? BATTER THEM!!!!!

OwlLady Thu 15-Nov-12 18:09:43

she said elderly in her first post and my own hang ups? get a grip grin

twinkletoescare Thu 15-Nov-12 18:11:59

dublinmammy it's worse when they are form a call centre and do that!

jjuice Thu 15-Nov-12 18:12:50

Tremolo and people who mix up ice cream until it's slimy?

Owl I believe this is a light hearted thread. OP shame on you for not having made that clear....

britmodgirl Thu 15-Nov-12 18:13:26

wasn't this a light hearted joke thread, who called the fun police?

Cortana Thu 15-Nov-12 18:13:35

Being elderly doesn't mean you can't eat nicely. My aunt is in her 80's and due to being a perfectly able adult she can eat at table nicely thank you.

The point was that being elderly or a child doesn't excuse bad table manners. The false teeth reference was OP pointing out that sometimes there are valid reasons for not eating nicely and of course this thread wasn't aimed at them.

What about people who eat noisily down the phone Twinkle and Dublin?!?!

britmodgirl Thu 15-Nov-12 18:14:33

banging of cutlery against teeth arrrggggghhh

DublinMammy Thu 15-Nov-12 18:15:23

Eating noisily down the phone whilst clearing throat and crinkling the wrapper? I may have a stroke soon....... Just from pure rage.

Tiredmumno1 Thu 15-Nov-12 18:15:32

My ds has SN and does this regularly, he also gets reminded every time to close his mouth, but I forgive him he just forgets smile

Tiredmumno1 Thu 15-Nov-12 18:16:04

I won't punch him either grin

Just a gentle reminder wink

kiwigirl42 Thu 15-Nov-12 18:17:11

oh god. My mother eats with her mouth open so you can see all the food being chomped around. She sucks at the same time as chewing and its just fucking disgusting. Makes me sick just thinking about it.

there is just NO NEED. NO fucking NEED. We've a labrador who eats nicer than her.

twinkletoescare Thu 15-Nov-12 18:17:32

jjuice I must remember to add a little (this is a joke thread) in my next post just so everyone can be clear wink

cortana I had a very good friend who used to chomp down the phone but would insist on talking/chomping for hours on end, god I'm shuddering just thinking of it!

Even my own eating, if I have a cold and can't eat with my mouth closed, drives me insanely mad, so yadnbu. I stopped eating with some family members and sometimes can't face dinner at the family table just because of the gross eating habits of my own kids/grandfather. It is probably my problem, not theirs, but I hate it. I have looked at my husband when he is eating noisily and had murderous thoughts...

OwlLady Thu 15-Nov-12 18:18:05

I really don't think I need to be patronised

Fair enough if it was meant to be lighthearted but I still find it offensive

Cortana Thu 15-Nov-12 18:18:20

<Passes Dublin smelling salts>

Arf Tired, always nice to hear about people not beating their kids. grin Although the wink after "gentle reminder" did make me wonder what you did!

twinkletoescare Thu 15-Nov-12 18:20:35

flyingspaghetti wow you've got it bad! grin

DublinMammy Thu 15-Nov-12 18:21:15

<revives self>

<thanks Cortana for smelling salts>

<realises has offended anyone who ever knew anyone who had a stroke or other vascular event ever as clearly was utterly serious>


Cortana Thu 15-Nov-12 18:21:22

I wasn't patronising you. You made a comment about OP's posts, I had read them in a different way (and I suspect in the way OP intended) and I pointed that out.

Cortana Thu 15-Nov-12 18:23:18

Don't worry Dublin, I had a mini stroke once (tempted to make Ex-DP joke but I'll leave it). Although I should point out I also wasn't making fun, I know if you're at risk of a stroke salt isn't really what you need, however I don't think smelling salts fall under the same.

totally agree.

Am stalling in inviting MIL who eats with her mouth open for Christmas. DH and I are already thinking up 'emergencies upstairs'

CotherMuckingFunt Thu 15-Nov-12 18:30:29

Bloody Nora, tetchy? Anyway....

I can't sit opposite or next to dh When he eats. He does this breathing in thing while scraping the food off his fork/spoon if it's hot. Drives m nuts.

But his worst offence is his ability to sound like a washing machine at the beginning of the cycle (when the water is filling and it slops from side to side) even when his mouth is closed.

HappyTurquoise Thu 15-Nov-12 18:32:02

A parent of one of DD's friends just said 'washing machine' whenever her DS ate with his mouth open, and he immediately closed his mouth to chew. She explained that she just asked him to imagine what it was like to see all the food he's eating going around in a washing machine, because that was the view she gets when he chews with his mouth open! DD loved the analogy and we've adopted the 'washing machine' alert for those moments when needed. grin

DublinMammy Thu 15-Nov-12 18:36:31

Cheers Cortana, you can't be too sure who has had a sense-of-humourectomy!!!!

applefalls Thu 15-Nov-12 18:50:29

Totally in agreement, OP.

Makes me want to pull out their teeth with pliers and no anaesthetic, sew up their gob with string and a rusty needle, leaving a small gap in which I will insert a high-pressure hose at mealtimes abd feed them liquid slop that way, at top speed.

But that's all happening in my head in case anyone feels offended. You'd never know how murderous I feel cos my gurning-with-disgust features are hidden under an opaque rain bonnet pulled right down to avoid splashes.

And my earholes are stuffed with loft lagging.

BatmanLovesHowlingAtTheMoon Thu 15-Nov-12 18:50:37

I am so glad I'm not alone!

Just remembered - also hate the banging of cutlery against teeth. I try not to be in the same room as DH when he eats cereal, as he closes his teeth over the spoon and scraaaaapes the food off. Lips! Use your lips!

Tressy Thu 15-Nov-12 18:55:53


cheekydevil Thu 15-Nov-12 18:59:08

Don't forget people who scrape the plate with their cutlery....and while we are on it people who say 'cutelry' smile

twinkletoescare Thu 15-Nov-12 18:59:24

This thread is making me chuckle!
I really thought I was the only one who had this phobia to the extent I do! Thrilled to learn I'm not grin

Everlong Thu 15-Nov-12 19:01:10

People who cough and don't cover their mouth whilst your eating.

Twice in the space of 30 seconds. Had to leave the fucking food.

DublinMammy Thu 15-Nov-12 19:01:34

Love that there is a scientific name for it - wold it stand up as a defence in court I wonder?

"Your Honour, I was compelled by my Misophonia to [insert violent verb here] the victim, I simply couldn't bear any more smacky-mouth noises"

Case dismissed?

DublinMammy Thu 15-Nov-12 19:02:05

Ahem, "would", sorry.

OwlLady Thu 15-Nov-12 19:08:02

I'm sorry, i think i have had a complete sense of humour bypass this week, maybe this month and was being aggressive and impulsive because I am so stressed out

I promise in future not to take things so personally. I do mean this blush

tasmaniandevilchaser Thu 15-Nov-12 19:10:10

DH has started to put super hot food in his mouth and then do a slurpy intake of breath through his open mouth. Is this grounds for divorce? I think so. cother we could do a joint application.

Coughing over your food....there can't be a jury in the land that would convict you.

tremolo you need some desensitization therapy, life must be very hard for you . Mixing rice pudding and jam?

twinkletoescare Thu 15-Nov-12 19:10:40

Happens to all of us owlLady grin

Growlithe Thu 15-Nov-12 19:16:38

YANBU. I can't stand snifflers who won't blow their noses either. Drives me crazy. I could never be a teacher for this reason and admire anyone who is.

Tiredmumno1 Thu 15-Nov-12 19:18:40

Cortana, the wink after meant nothing. Honest. grin

TremoloGreen Thu 15-Nov-12 19:38:25

tas Oh no. What would the therapy consist of? Probably sitting in the middle of a circle of people while they all simultaneously licked a yoghurt pot lid. I think I would just spontaneously combust. grin

trixymalixy Thu 15-Nov-12 19:41:03

YANBU, my other pet hate is people who hold their knife like a pen too!

DublinMammy Thu 15-Nov-12 19:47:16

Oh no!!! Not the knife/pen people, Trixy. Had forgotten them....

tasmaniandevilchaser Thu 15-Nov-12 20:00:39

grin I can do it for a small fee. I will sit in front of you and drink cappuccinos, eating all the froth with a spoon. Don't worry I won't tie you down.

tasmaniandevilchaser Thu 15-Nov-12 20:01:03

that last msg was for tremolo btw

Shutupanddrive Thu 15-Nov-12 20:03:44

Also has anyone mentioned slurping? angry

I cannot stand the sound of people scraping food off the fork with their teeth. It makes my skin crawl. So I put up with unfathomable closed-mouthed noisy eating but I tell anyone whose teeth are scraping against metal to stop or they're getting no more food.

*Onward bound*: my DH also has a big nose and nostrils... Maybe that is the source of the problem. He claims it's to do with the shape of the inside of his mouth. He doesn't seem to be able to prevent it, but it does make me feel quite stabby (especially when he's being annoying).

Alisvolatpropiis Thu 15-Nov-12 20:56:31

My former boss did this. Whenever there was a work do,we would fight not to sit opposite him. Once sat down nobody would move to go to the toilet or anything because the person sitting opposite him would move and then we'd fight over seats again.

How he didn't notice I will never know. He was an utter cunt. I loathed him. The chewing with mouth open and spraying people with food just clinched it for me.

Alisvolatpropiis Thu 15-Nov-12 20:57:51

Shutup above mentioned former boss used to slurp as well.


jjuice Thu 15-Nov-12 21:10:18

owl hope the rest of the month is better. wine or brew

MrsDeVere Thu 15-Nov-12 21:12:32

owl sad
It happens. Don't beat yourself up. I hope things get better.

MrsDeVere Thu 15-Nov-12 21:13:10

When OH sneezes more than twice in a row I want to hit him with a chair.

Cortana Thu 15-Nov-12 21:57:31

Owl, I PM'd you earlier hun xx

wigglybeezer Thu 15-Nov-12 22:13:38

You all need to google misophonia, Ds2 has it and it makes family life very difficult sometimes as he can't stand the ( minor) noises his brothers make. I am about to try a hypnotherapy tape on him.

YADNBU, my Mum does this. We reprimand her for it now and just leave when she's eating. She also talks with her mouth full of food <<boak>>

MrsChristmasVamos Thu 15-Nov-12 22:20:00

This drives me nuts.

It's a real pet hate.

I know I must make a noise when I eat, so I am sure that sometimes I am irrational.

DS is the worst culprit. Only because when you tell him to eat whatever it is quietly, he does. Might just be cos he's an alien teenager.

However, would have gladly caused DH pain just now. Just had to listen to him eating a huge bowl of Crunchy Nuts. WHY does it feel like it will never end ? Then, just as you get used to it, it stops.

I may get him back in a while by devouring a few bags of crisps. The deep ridge ones. Except I wouldn't cos he says it doesn't bother him ! Which I find odd, cos certain foods I eat get on me nerves if they are too loud.

I am weird, I know that, in my defence. grin

TeaMakesItToTheTop Thu 15-Nov-12 22:21:43


And I match your load eating and give you sniffing.

Ewgh. Both of them give me the RAGE. I shuffled in my chair all the way from the West Country to London last week because I was sat opposite someone who did both. The shuffling was to stop me shouting at him THE RULES OF THE TABLE.

Does anyone know what age the eating loudly becomes an issue? DS4 is 2 and at the moment I don't need to shout "Eat with your mouth closed and talk with your mouth empty" at him like I do at DS3 (8) if he forgets the RULES OF THE TABLE. I need to know how long I've got to train him. blush

BibiBlocksberg Thu 15-Nov-12 23:03:44

Fellow Food Noise Open Mouth Chew rager here, vile, utterly vile!

Bag rustling is also one of my 'triggers' -'people take the piss out of me because I cut bags of crisps and other noisy food containers with scissors.

Gets the job over and done with in a second without having to listen to endless rustle rustle rustle noises.

Also work in an office that's so quiet you can hear your blood rushing through every single vain.

I want to commit murder every lunch time when the crisp munching starts all around me.

I've learned to moisten each crisp down so it's inaudible now (to save being a hippocrite for one)

I may do a national tour of talks on 'crisp moistening' and considerate scissor using smile

Tanyaaah Fri 16-Nov-12 09:28:40

I used to work with someone who would sit and eat an entire yoghurt with his tongue. EVERY DAY.
It was so disgusting I had to eat my lunch back in the workshop.

Growlithe Fri 16-Nov-12 17:49:58

MrsDV I thought my DH was the only one who has to sneeze twice in a row. Stupid big comedy loud ones too. even when the DCs are in bed. It drives me insane.

MrsDeVere Fri 16-Nov-12 18:02:13

OH does MASSIVE ones. One I can deal with, two is annoying but THREE??
Its so unnecessary

Its just showing off really. Don't you think?


actually serious

Growlithe Fri 16-Nov-12 18:19:17

Yes DH does the big AHHHHHHHHHCCCCHHHHOOOOOOOOOOO thing. Twice. It is completely for effect. He also snores in a ridiculous way. It is just showing off.

Lavenderhoney Fri 16-Nov-12 18:19:43

Comedy sneezes! And shouting -a whooshooo! While they do it.
Food slurping, and not just soup. And munching noisily with mouth open- I have to get away.

I can't bear people eating on the phone either esp apples and crisps - and I say ' look, call me back when you have finished your snacks' ( is that rude?)

Gum chewers. Hate them. And popping gum. Makes me really edgy.

That's why I dont go to the cinema, it's like being crushed onto an economy flight complete with crappy small seats, film ruined by all the munching, endless crunching of crisps and ice from the the giant buckets of coke people seem to need. With rustly packets. And nuts! Stop licking yor fingers! And open the bag! What's with the tiny corner torn off and sticking your finger in the bag and struggling.

Think I need a sit downsmile

MrsDeVere Fri 16-Nov-12 18:22:27

I also hate those stupid tiny sneezes that people do. Like a little pfft.

I think I am perfectly reasonable

DSis does those ridiculous tiny sneezes.

Like a little squeaky "chee"

Pointless, absolutely pointless.

Growlithe Fri 16-Nov-12 18:32:39

We need to define the perfect sneeze. grin

twinkletoescare Fri 16-Nov-12 18:54:25

I love how this has turned into a sneeze bashing thread! grin

Jackinthezombie Fri 16-Nov-12 20:16:11

Carefull, you might turn into this guy. here

jjuice Sat 17-Nov-12 21:45:36

Perfect sneeze is so loud they can hear it in the next town with an exaggerated Aaaaachooooooo noise.

I love sneezing really loudly. clears my brain and gets on the food slurpers nerves.

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