To not like this top that a little boy was wearing...?

(68 Posts)
MrsWolowitz Wed 14-Nov-12 14:08:57

At playgroup this morning there was a little boy about 2 years old wearing a top saying "anything girls can do boys can do better"

I was [shocked] and actually pretty angry

Am I being over-sensitive or is that a horrible crappy thing to have emblazoned across anyones chest let alone your little boys?

DoingTheBestICan Wed 14-Nov-12 14:10:21

I wouldn't get myself worked up over it.

HousewifefromBethlehem Wed 14-Nov-12 14:10:35

Yabu he can't even read it grin

I assume he wasn't BF... It would piss me off too.

StewieGriffinsMom Wed 14-Nov-12 14:12:29

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

valiumredhead Wed 14-Nov-12 14:12:35

I got REALLY steamed up last year over a Father's Day card which said " Shhhh don't tell mum but I love you more Dad" I was frothing for days over that one!

numbum Wed 14-Nov-12 14:12:58

Shocked and angry over a tshirt? YABU and over sensitive

numbum Wed 14-Nov-12 14:13:37

Why would it piss people off? confused

OldCatLady Wed 14-Nov-12 14:16:02

Well its just like that song/rhyme 'anything you can do, I can do better' but for boys, it is a joke...I doubt the 2YO actually believes it....confused why you're a angry.

ChippingInLovesAutumn Wed 14-Nov-12 14:16:02

Daft question really, how can you be unreasonable in 'not liking' something. You can like or dislike whatever you please, it's what you do about it that is U or NU.

You need to get out more if this shocked you.

I've seen it both ways. It's not something I'd buy - but it's certainly not shocking. Also, if he's at playgroup, I seriously doubt any of the kids were reading it and feeling buoyed up or deflated by it hmm

In short, you are being over-sensitive - but you wont be alone in that, there will be plenty of others agreeing and frothing over it.

BooyhooRemembering Wed 14-Nov-12 14:16:08

i wouldn't buy it but i wouldn't get angry over it.

MrsWolowitz Wed 14-Nov-12 14:17:11

Num i know that this is nothing like the t-shirt in the OP but a re you suggesting that its always over-sensitive to get angry over a shirt?

Even things like this ??

MrsWolowitz Wed 14-Nov-12 14:18:43

I just doon't like it, I don't like the 'boys are stupid - throw rocks at them' stuff either.

i think its pig ignorant and just hmm

People buying T-shirts are TRYING to communicate something, otherwise why print words on them? IMO if they wear T-shirts like the one in your PP, they are communicating that they are a complete twunt. Putting your baby in a shirt that denigrates girls, IS saying something to everyone in the room. That's why you do it, surely.

Mrswolowitz I think the rape tshirt might be an entirely different kettle of fish!!

hazleweatherfieldgirldetective Wed 14-Nov-12 14:22:49

So what did the nursery/his parents say when you complained?

MrsWolowitz Wed 14-Nov-12 14:24:33

secret I know thats why I said "i know that this is nothing like the t-shirt in the OP" I was just highlighting that it is ok to be annoyed by something on a t-shirt.

MrsTP thats what I think, otherwise why have anything written on the top? or just gibberish? It is a message and a pretty crappy one at that imo

wigglesrock Wed 14-Nov-12 14:25:24

Its not my thing but it doesn't anger me. My daughter has a top that has several female superheroes on it and it says "Look out boys". a friend told me that she didn't like it as she has sons [shrug]

MrsWolowitz Wed 14-Nov-12 14:26:35

hazle I didn't as I wasn't sure if I was being over-sensitive. To be honest I'm still not sure if I am or not.

I don't doubt its a pretty ignorant and stupid thing to put on a top but whether its generally offensive I don't know, I might just be being OTT by getting annoyed.

hazleweatherfieldgirldetective Wed 14-Nov-12 14:30:29

I think you possibly are being oversensitive to be angry and shocked. The rape tshirt deserves that response, I don't think the little boy's tshirt does.

It's a silly sentiment, and not one I would choose to emblazon on my own son, however I have seen DNiece wearing a bib that read 'Girls rule, Boys drool' and it didn't offend me. It also didn't seem to offend her eight year old brother who spent the whole day pointing out the hilarity of it.

StewieGriffinsMom Wed 14-Nov-12 19:42:21

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

degutastic Wed 14-Nov-12 19:45:29

MrsWolowitz is it wrong that I kinda like the w anchor t shirt on the page with the (horrible) rape one? Not that I'd wear it, natch...

WilsonFrickett Wed 14-Nov-12 19:51:58

It's just the same old sexist bull. That said, someone bought the 'boys are stupid, throw rocks at them' stuff so obviously there's money to be made out of stupid parents who buy into lame stereotypes.

candr Wed 14-Nov-12 19:53:01

Some of those were pretty bad but did giggle at the Mumsnet one. Don't like shirts that have sexual or derogitry? slogans on. I think some parents don't read what is on tops before they buy them and others just don't care.

My dd has a jumper which just says, 'girls are better'.

Meh.

OutragedAtThePriceOfFreddos Wed 14-Nov-12 19:54:13

I pretty much hate any type of slogan on a tshirt, no matter what statement they are trying to make.

But at least there is finally one that's in favour of boys, because for years up until now, every sexist slogan on a child's top I have seen has been the other way round.

Boomerwang Wed 14-Nov-12 19:58:29

Only adults really get what it implies. YABU about this particular slogan.

inneedofsanity Wed 14-Nov-12 20:11:37

Here we go - another thread to get worked up about how sexist and oppressive towards women society is...apparently.
Its a T - SHIRT!

I must live in a part of the UK where we are oblivious or immune to this stuff. Everyone I know, speak to or interact with just gets on with life. They dont agonise overchildrens t shirts with slogans meant to be funny, or feel that the evil patriarchy is oppressing them at every turn.
I find it sad that we are teaching girls to think the worst of boys and men at every turn.

inneedofsanity Wed 14-Nov-12 20:15:01

Poor repetition of phrase there blush but I get fed up with the mn vitriol about this kind of thing.

dawnpreview Wed 14-Nov-12 20:17:20

Not a child's t-shirt, but look at this one!
http://www.jamrags.com/viewDetail.php?proid=154&color=Navy

Sorry if link doesn't work, don't know how to do it on phone

SunflowersSmile Wed 14-Nov-12 20:23:34

I get a lot of hand me downs for which I am grateful. Certain clothes my ds wears I probably would not have chosen [even some of expensive stuff]. However, as it saves me buying stuff he wears it.
One exception- a Che Guevara T- shirt aged 2-3 years. Just felt uncomfortable..

GreenShadow Wed 14-Nov-12 20:24:26

Do you know, when I first read the start of this thread, I thought the slogan was being 'offensive' to boys as I assumed it was tongue in cheek, because I automatically think girls are thought to be better at most things than boys these days and the t-shirt was just 'making boys feel better'. (Not phrased very well, hope you get my drift)

Funny how different people's minds work.

LucieMay Wed 14-Nov-12 20:28:44

http://jamrags.com/viewDetail.php?proid=154&color=Navy

Ha ha ha! This one!

teacherandguideleader Wed 14-Nov-12 20:32:15

I have a t shirt that says 'boys are stupid, throw rocks at them'.

(note to self: do not wear this on own clothes day at school)

MoelFammau Wed 14-Nov-12 20:35:13

I do think that little boys get such a bad rap. Girls out-perform them at every turn until they reach the end of secondary school so maybe the t-shirt is a little confidence booster?

I have a daughter myself but a friend has 2 lovely wee boys and she was telling me that the oldest (5yo) was told in school by his teacher (ffs) that girls are smarter than boys and less trouble.

GreenShadow Wed 14-Nov-12 20:40:43

Exactly Moel

Alisvolatpropiis Wed 14-Nov-12 20:41:54

I think t-shirts for little girls saying "WAG in training" or "Future footballers girlfriend" are far more unpleasant.

ShellyBoobs Wed 14-Nov-12 20:44:41

...what do you think that does to our girls to be constantly told boys are better than them.

Girls being constantly told boys are better than them?

When? By whom?

confused

And OP, you missed 'horrified' from your op. grin

KatyPeril Wed 14-Nov-12 20:46:39

YANBU. Let's not have fun with anything anymore. Fun is offensive. Down with fun.

BastardSpiders Wed 14-Nov-12 21:03:24

YABU - there are far more t-shirts that are 'offensive' towards boys than there are the other way around. If you had spotted a little girl wearing a t-shirt saying that girls are better than boys, then I seriously doubt you would have posted. The problem is with you, not with a child's t-shirt.

Have you considered getting a life?

DowagersHump Wed 14-Nov-12 21:12:03

Any t-shirt that makes wholesale and derogatory comments about a group of people based on their gender/race/whatever is stupid and pathetic.

And parents who buy them for their children or give them to them to wear are stupid and pathetic and/or illiterate. I wouldn't want anything to do with a family where a kid was wearing a tshirt like this. Not least because they probably read the daily fail

lifeintheolddogyet Wed 14-Nov-12 21:21:19

I've lost count of the number of t shirts aimed at boys (blue, green etc) I've seen with 'Little Monster' or 'Trouble' or some similar dross slapped over the front. I baulk at that just as much as the one that the OP saw today and disliked. Girls are 'good' boys are 'naughty' blah blah blah.

So, in theory, YANBU OP.

DumSpiroSpero Wed 14-Nov-12 22:04:45

My DD had the exact same thing in reverse when she was about 2 (anything boys can do etc)...

At least that evens the score I suppose!

FreePeaceSweet Wed 14-Nov-12 22:05:31

I love the Mumsnet shirt. Thats funny grin

unrulysun Thu 15-Nov-12 21:54:07

Wow, Bastardspiders missed the point by about 3 miles there. Back to Basics school...

HousewifefromBethlehem Thu 15-Nov-12 22:20:09

My ds has a t-shirt saying 'Boys and girls are equal'

He also has one saying 'I hate girls. Except ones with big tits'

grin

Ds3 has one saying boys rule

EchoBitch Thu 15-Nov-12 22:35:21

Housewife how old is your son?

HousewifefromBethlehem Thu 15-Nov-12 22:51:02

Nearly 11. Of course his t shirt doesn't really say that. It says 'tell my mum to get the fuck off mumsnet'

grin

bellabreeze Thu 15-Nov-12 23:00:11

Its just a joke my son has a tshirt saying 'will trade sister for video games' even though of course he wouldn't. There are plenty of 'girls are the best' type tshirts too

FlatFacedArmy Thu 15-Nov-12 23:00:56

I am 30 in December.

When I was that age, I had a tshirt that read "Anything boys can do, girls can do better" and it was one of my favourite tops, according to my parents, who thought it was cute. And I've seen that slogan (that GIRLS can do better) around many, many times while growing up. IME it has the status of a common saying, regardless of any sexism.

I think YABU to be so shocked by it, it's not a slap in the face for feminism, in fact I would take it as some kind of tongue-in-cheek retort to the girl-orientated older saying.

(Forgive me if I haven't worded this well, I'm still struggling with baby brain and not remembering words that should be on the tip of my tongue...)

Startail Fri 16-Nov-12 00:55:23

DD would have read that by 4 or 5 and told him straight.
"Oh no they're not, girls rule!"

Fairyegg Fri 16-Nov-12 01:31:35

I have better things to be angry about therefore yabu.

ChippingInLovesAutumn Fri 16-Nov-12 01:39:18

I wouldn't want anything to do with a family where a kid was wearing a tshirt like this. Not least because they probably read the daily fail

Really? You are going to judge an entire family based on a one childs t-shirt. That's far more unreasonable than the t-shirt.

SomersetONeil Fri 16-Nov-12 01:50:51

"You are going to judge an entire family based on a one childs t-shirt"

I certainly would.

And I'd give this one a wide berth.

He also has one that says hazardous to sisters, he doesn't have any sisters which shows how much attention I pay to slogans on shirts

Dahlen Fri 16-Nov-12 08:03:53

*Any t-shirt that makes wholesale and derogatory comments about a group of people based on their gender/race/whatever is stupid and pathetic. *

^^ This

Try substituting the genders with race and see how 'ironic' or 'harmless' it sounds then.

"Anything black people can do white people can do better" hmm

Girls may outperform boys in primary education, but seeing as they still suffer a 15% pay gap, are disproportionately represented among those living in poverty (65% of which are women), it doesn't seem to be helping them much.

Dahlen Fri 16-Nov-12 08:05:35

BTW, this wouldn't work me up - if I got worked up about every instance of casual sexism I came across I'd be frothing on a daily basis several times over. Life's too short and this would barely register on my radar.

But that doesn't make it ok, and I would judge the intelligence and values who thought that this was an appropriate or 'fun' T-shirt for a 2 year old.

MrsWolowitz Fri 16-Nov-12 08:29:16

Hmm some interesting points.

Bastard do fuck off, there's a dear.

I would still have been very hmm if the genders were reversed. I've already said that I don't like the whole 'boys are stupid, throw rocks at them'.

To me this top is similar to 'anything black kids can do, white kids can do better'. There would rightly be outrage if such a shitty top exsisted so why should this be different?

Oh and what Dahlen said.

RawShark Fri 16-Nov-12 14:15:56

Again what Dahlen said. I wouldn't put my son in this unless it had been bought my a fond relative in which case you have to put it on at least once for a visit or photo!
HOwever
I dislike all slogan (and ostentatiously branded logo )clothes, and have since I was about 12. My MIL gave us a relatively inoffensive one (If you think I'm handsome wait till you see my daddy) and I ...... just don't like it.

I find the "lock up your daughters" ones particularly annoying at the moment.

whistlestopcafe Fri 16-Nov-12 14:19:02

I wouldn't buy it but I most certainly wouldn't get cross over it. I have seen a T shirt that says "Girls rock, boys suck". Stupid tshirt but I'm not worried that it will damage my boys self esteem.

achillea Fri 16-Nov-12 14:26:24

Some of those t-shirts on that website did make me wince.
YANBU - people need to take more responsibility. They are parents, not teenagers.

CalmingMiranda Fri 16-Nov-12 14:28:25

The slogan is stupid, not funny, and part of a whole mindless jokey dialogue that adds to the whole world in which boys and girls grow up in, "girls are like this and have pink clothes and toys, boys are like that and have dark clothes and violent toys, girls need to be prettty and then sexy, boys will be boys, aka boistrous, and then earn 10% more money"

Naff at best, insidious at worst.

Why would anyone actually buy this for a child to wear? It would be so much cheaper without the stooopid comment.

CalmingMiranda Fri 16-Nov-12 14:30:08

Why do we have to encourage this antipathy between girls and boys? Girls are better / boys suck / throw rocks....

Let them see each other as ordinary and children, just ike them. Why make a dichotomy out of it?

One of the t-shirts I have seen on a 3-year old child that I hated was "Father Christmas doesn't exist but I can't read so I don't know that." Grrrr.
I don't like it, but it anything written on the clothes of children too young to have chosen it irritates me. I don't think you should have slogans unless the person wearing them understands the implications of it. Much as I wanted to put DS in cute AC/DC baby vests, I didn't because that's my taste not his and he has a personality of his own.

fuzzpig Fri 16-Nov-12 23:29:10

YANBU, I don't like slogan stuff like that either.

Everlong Fri 16-Nov-12 23:31:21

I wouldn't buy it. But I wouldn't think much of it tbh other than it was naff.

SouthernShepherdess Fri 16-Nov-12 23:54:34

A lot of things rattle my cage..something that is supposed to be a bit of fun isn't one of them!

If you think that's offensive, then what about when I was on holiday as a kid when I was about 8, we were at the clubhouse or wherever one evening..there was this northern family there. I was all dressed up sweet in my pink dress with daisies on it and knee length socks and pretty sandles, (typical 80's style), and this poor unfortunate little girl of the same age, to my mother's horror, was wearing a baseball cap with a plastic dogs turd on it, with the word "SHITHEAD" written on it! My mum never forgets the way I was just sat there staring at this other kid! Priceless. One I shall never forget grin

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