Child modelling, please help !!

(197 Posts)
cutiesmum Sun 11-Nov-12 17:37:49

Hi everyone,

I am totally new to this site so i may not have posted this in the correct place - apologies!
I am also new to child modelling, and would like some advice if possible.

I applied to lots of different child modelling agencies and sent off pics of my daughter. She has so far had a yes from Kitschkids, Bizzikids, Talent Management, Chillikids, Childplay, Scallywags, and Norrie Carr.

Grace and Galor and Bonnie + Betty both said no due to us not living in the London area sad

I have ruled out Bizzikids, Talent management , Scallywags and Childsplay.

I have read lots of reviews about Chillikids, Kitsch Kids and Norrie Carr and they all sound like great agencies.

Does anyone have experience or advice on these three?

I have been researching quite a while and need to make a decision asap so any help or guidence would be great!

Thanks smile

WelshMaenad Sun 11-Nov-12 17:39:25

Or, you could decide not to exploit your child.

Icanhasnickname Sun 11-Nov-12 17:50:28

It seems like you have done an awful lot of research and preparation work for something you will no doubt be telling us is for 'fun' and is your DD's choice??
Would I be right in guessing you are a failed model or something like that, and you are now living through your poor doll, i mean, child.

Agree with Welsh.

Never understood why anyone would want to do that to their DC not matter how beautiful or 'talented'.

Why do you need to decide ASAP surely if they are all so desperate to have her they will be willing to wait? Or are they just wanting your money ASAP.

Did you check out all the zillion other topics - many of them much more suitable to your query - before settling on 'Am I Being Unreasonable'?

Just wondering............as you do

Gigondas Sun 11-Nov-12 17:53:59

Agree with all the others but if you genuinely want to--exploit or live vicariously through your child whilst saying it is fun etc-- there was a child modelling thread on meet ups or somewhere.

Tweasels Sun 11-Nov-12 17:54:54

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

jendot Sun 11-Nov-12 17:55:29

I'm not sure AIBU was a good place for this post- 'we' can be a bit blunt and forthright with our replies in AIBU
I think you may be better in the child modelling threads or on other subjects if you are looking for actual advice on agencies rather than our opinions on child modelling per se!

LadyFlumpalot Sun 11-Nov-12 17:56:13

Ignoring the comments above, I can tell you right now that no reputable agency will charge you a "fee" for you or your child to go in the books. They will also not charge you for casting photos. Any agency that does is a scam.

Modelling is very hard work, I'm a part time photographers model and 28 - I find it gruelling.

Please take a moment to really think if it's what you want for your DC. It will mean dropping everything to rush to castings, having to sit in a cold corridor for hours just to show your portfolio for 3 minutes - and in most cases be turned down.

Please google Alba Models. It's a blog and the site (used) to have an up to data list of the reputable agencies.

I hope this helps!

ilovesooty Sun 11-Nov-12 17:56:49

I think the username says it all. hmm

My son is cuter than your child. Jus' sayin'.

But really, urgently needing help with child modelling? Maybe Google a modelling forum?!

The only name I recognise from your list is Scallywags. I would just google and see what kind of complaints come up. Or repost in a different topic.

DD was on an agency's books some years back - thought it would be a fun and was just horrid really - lots of last minute pressure to pitch up in London, lots of little dolls with ringletted hair and lip gloss. Lasted about 3 castings I think.

Otoh, I know of someone who does it, and they have a lot of good pictures, and treat it like a job from the little I know.

pigletmania Sun 11-Nov-12 18:03:58

I would not post in AIBU as you do get a lot of judginess. Look on te other talk topics, like style and beauty fr more appropriate advice

IneedAgoldenNickname Sun 11-Nov-12 18:21:23

I'm going to ignore the judgy comments, and assume you are genuine.

My friend had a modelling agency DESPERATE to sign her ds1, I think it was scallywags but could be wrong. She paid the fee, then when she took him to have his portfolio shots her childcare for her ds2 let her down so she took him along too. Of course, they were desperate top sign him too, and agreed on a reduced price to sign them both. Ds1 never got any work, and ds2 got all of one job - on asos.com . The parents never made their money back, and decided not to renew the contracts street the first year.

Her sons are gorgeous looking, I'd almost say better looking than mine.

My opinion is that they probably just want to take your money.

GhostShip Sun 11-Nov-12 18:58:47

Let your kids be kids and stop living a dream through them.

They'll have plenty of time working when they're older.

Feminine Sun 11-Nov-12 18:59:41

I was a child model and a fashion model (in London) for 17 yrs.

Never hand over any money. Google the AMA (association of model agents) for a reputable one.

You can only try it. You never know if your child has potential unless you do.

Bear in mind, if your child is at all shy it will be a very difficult thing to pull off!

Good luck.

IneedAsockamnesty Sun 11-Nov-12 19:16:48

Having been a child model and later a normal model.

Just don't, it's very hard work people are out to prey on your parental desire to confirm your child's loveliness and exploit you.

However if your not stupid enough to pay to put your child on someone's books or pay for photos then you may be ok. If you are stupid enough to do so then you don't stand a chance of not being exploited and rinsed.

Try those ghastly pageants instead they are IMHO gross but at least they are honest about it and you are less likely to fall for a con from a none respectable agency

WelshMaenad Sun 11-Nov-12 20:03:05

Yikes, don't try the ghastly pageants. They just make me think if poor little JonBenet Ramsay and induce extreme nausea.

Why can't children just have a childhood? Is that not fashionable any more?

IneedAsockamnesty Sun 11-Nov-12 20:04:17

Me to welsh but at least they are honest about being dreadfull

WelshMaenad Sun 11-Nov-12 20:07:05

I don't know, I think you run the risk of getting sucked into it all and thinking that fake tan and eyelash extensions on three year olds is perfectly normal behaviour. Meep.

fosterdream Sun 11-Nov-12 20:10:38

I get stopped loads with my eldest DD with offers I refuse if she wants to model when she is 16+ I will allow her to but right now I trip to wacky is more fun than in a hot studio!

Fakebook Sun 11-Nov-12 20:11:58

I run a child modelling agency. Just pop £500 in an envelope and send it to:

Cutie Patooties
PO Box 40
London

I'll get your cutie a job!

freddiefrog Sun 11-Nov-12 20:20:38

The only one I've ever heard of on your list is Scallywags.

I was at an event with my littlest DD and someone allegedly acting on Scallywags's behalf approached us as she was 'desperate' to sign her up as they could get her 'so much work'

I made some initial enquiries to see what was what, and then ran a mile. £200+ signing up fee for someone 'desperate' to sign her up? They must think I came down in the last shower

A friend signed up her son with Scallywags around the same time and got 1 job (M&S I think)

OpheliaPayneAgain Sun 11-Nov-12 20:28:29

ooh bitch thread!

Of course without child model agencies you couldn't coo and fart over pampers adverts, or have any M&S party dresses modelled, or indeed cutie little fellas doign a ready brek advert

loveroflife Sun 11-Nov-12 20:40:00

My best friend's dd was accepted by Scallywags and Norrie Carr. They chose NC as Scallywags apparently takes anyone and charge a large joining fee.

NC was half the price (reg fee) whatever they label it as but she said there was just too many kids for too little jobs. She had three auditions in a year, and at each audition there was between 5- 10 other kids from Norrie Carr alone! That's not including all the other agencies.

Her DH pulled the plug as the train journey didn't even get covered - a complete time waster and non starter. The thing is (sorry OP) it's for the parents not the kids. A toddler or baby has not a single scrap of interest in modelling.

Take her to soft play instead, she'll enjoy it a lot more.....

IneedAsockamnesty Sun 11-Nov-12 20:42:40

I have no issues at all with child Modeling agencies none well if they can actually get jobs so people can coo over the babies in the ads.

But I do have huge issues with the ones who claim to be able to if you pay money then don't.

Roseformeplease Sun 11-Nov-12 20:46:09

You didn't actually ask, but YABU. Child modelling is not about the child.

Softlysoftly Sun 11-Nov-12 20:48:23

I have considered this for DD1 but only because she is constantly asking to dress up and have her photo taken hmm I'm not sure the reality would be as much fun iyswim and I would hate her to be judged on her looks, which is oxymoronic when it comes to modelling I know!

But it does make me think someone's child has to be in the adverts and if it was treated as fun ie no expectation of work, no pressure, not minding it probably costing rather than making money then why not?

Anyway from my brief look into it urban angels seemed to be the MN favourite and from their website their books are open for applications until tomorrow.

BUT don't pressure your kid and don't expect to make any money and if she hates it stop no debates.

cutiesmum Mon 12-Nov-12 16:55:16

Firstly thanks for all the replies, especially the negative and slightly insulting ones ha ha! Although, for people who think its SOOO bad, why you would sit and waste your time giving out your small minded opinions is well and truely beyond me!

Someone suggested I may be a failed model lol - answer to that is no I'm not! Are you???? Maybe that's why your so bitter!?

I came on here to ask a question, not to open a discussion about what people think is correct and incorrect! There's more in the world to worry about than someone putting their child forward for modelling!

Maybe you have nothing better to do than sit and attempt to judge people on a wesbite (lol) but I do so thanks again but I'm off! Ciao

Ps wouldn't be surprised if half of you have tried to put your own kids forward, and have been told NO wink

givemeaclue Mon 12-Nov-12 17:01:37

Aren't castings normally in London?

cheekydevil Mon 12-Nov-12 17:02:33

Oh dear sad

NotQuintAtAllOhNo Mon 12-Nov-12 17:03:44

<ducks for the shower of rattles that op just threw out of her pram>

grin

lol lol

grin

And lol some more. It is SO fun whenever there is a moggling thread here. The OPs are behaving predictably to the script.

I am sure they are part of MNHQ robotic posting programme, to give us a larf now and then.

wink

On a serious note, ds2 is extremely photogenic, looks like an angel, and people keep telling me I should sign him up. No way would I put him through that.
My friends daughter is a model. No no no.

Icanhasnickname Mon 12-Nov-12 17:04:07

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

NotQuintAtAllOhNo Mon 12-Nov-12 17:05:22

Thinks of little chimney sweeps working for pennies and apples in victorian London. I guess the difference is that the children are clean, and the grime on their faces is by Dior not LaPlaceFire

givemeaclue Mon 12-Nov-12 17:08:22

If it doesn't work out, sweepz kidz may have vacancies for little cuties to pop up chimneys-and there is no registration fee!

cheekydevil Mon 12-Nov-12 17:08:51

Will no-one think of the overused exclamation and question marks? Not to mentioned the "lol"? <shudder>

Please all stop with the lolling! hmm [shudder]

OP why not get a hobby and let your child enjoy being a child rather than dragging her to call outs for people to judge her on her looks.

HoolioHallio Mon 12-Nov-12 17:13:47

If you need to make a decision ASAP, can I suggest names in a hat ? Or flipping of a coin ?

HTH wink

shemademedoit Mon 12-Nov-12 17:20:26

A friend's little bot does it. I've seen him in loads of stuff and they've quite a best egg set aside for when he's bigger, thanks entirely to his own hard work. He loves it, but I'm sure he's a rare case. No idea which agency though, sorry.

shemademedoit Mon 12-Nov-12 17:21:04

Boy!!!!!! Oh dear. No modelling involving bots. Yet.

shemademedoit Mon 12-Nov-12 17:21:46

Damn it I give up. Nest egg. Etc etc. correct my fat fingered iPhone mistakes yourselves!!!!!

Sallyingforth Mon 12-Nov-12 17:23:22

OP please do some web research on these agencies. Google their names. You will find stories of disappointment and financial loss.
Don't subject yourself and your child to this.

WhenShallWeThreeKingsMeetAgain Mon 12-Nov-12 17:24:18

Will someone please explain to me how the OP can be "totally new to this site"..........yet have 41 posts beside her name?

nancerama Mon 12-Nov-12 17:25:13

My old company used to hire child and adult models for promotional photography and advertising. They used to approach Norrie Carr, Elliott Brown and MOT to send candidates to castings. I believe these agencies charge a fee, but this is deducted from the first few jobs.

I wouldn't involve DS in modelling though. There is a lot of waiting around at castings and an awful lot of the children were the kids of lower division WAGS. I just don't think I'd have a lot in common with the other mums and DS would be bored to distraction with the waiting around.

Firawla Mon 12-Nov-12 17:39:29

OP one of my ds is with one of the agencies u mentioned up there (kk), ive been quite happy with them. TBH alot of the negative comments on here i think are people with no experience of child modelling just moaning and being rude for the sake of it. They do take a fee when you join, this is normal in most agencies its adults modelling where u dont pay anything i think, but that said i wouldnt suggest going with expensive agencies and dont pay for "portfolios" as that is a rip off cos they will need thier pics updated regularly as being young they change often, so pics quickly going out of date

All this talk about financial loss etc, will probably apply if you do get scammed with all these portfolios and non legit agencies but with the once youve mentioned they are all okay (not sure about talent management)
Bizziekids youve ruled out anyway, i would mention i find them a bit of a pain as they are really strict and moany about the updates and will kick u off the books if you dont update in time, then want money to go back on again!!! (this happened to another of my ds so i just left it as i thought im not paying again and cant be bothered with it)

norrie car & chilli kids ive heard of parents with kids with them, not sure any specifics but think they are quite good. norrie car joining fee is quite expensive tho if i remember correctly???

kk who my ds is with are very good in that they dont get all stroppy with the parents like bk, they are quite laid back and dont expect u to run round jumping through hoops all the time! so i find that so much better. they are friendly and helpful. my son whos with them has been with them for about 2 yrs now? hes had a few jobs and a few castings, and easily made the joining money back on the first job so finance aspect of it is not too much of an issue.

as for the children not enjoying it u have to see how they get on, u know ur child so know whether they will be okay or not. mine can be a bit shy now so once his contract is finished i might not renew it depending how it goes on his next job. its not like they are tied into it for life!! so u can try it and if it goes well then great, if not then no loss really.

dont know why some people are soo against it - exploiting children etc. tbh i think my son will probably be pleased with the extra money in his account once he is older and i show him that he has earned this. if u see they really not enjoying it then u pull them out, its not particularly a big deal

btw there is a much more helpful thread on netmums on this topic so have a look there cos for some reason people on here can be weird about it. but if ur not on netmums can pm me if you want any more info

Bobyan Mon 12-Nov-12 17:43:37

YABU

I'm a model <strikes a pose>. And so's my dog <dog vogues>.

Floggingmolly Mon 12-Nov-12 18:16:33

Oi, stroppy! All people are pointing out is that if these agencies are requesting payment of £200+, it's unlikely they're being very discriminating.
Therefore the odds are against them finding work for your dd, her being a cutie notwithstanding.
Does she have your diva temperament too?

WelshMaenad Mon 12-Nov-12 19:07:52

Au contraire, OP, my children would, of I was so inclined, take the modelling scene by storm, they're gorgeous and sickeningly photogenic.

However, I'm just not vain and self absorbed enough as a parent to subject them to so much judgement and disappointment for my own strange gratification. Which us what most of the child modelling world is built on.

Most of their childhood photos will be taken at the park, not in a studio prancing around in overpriced clothes to help line the pockets of done commercial giant. Fuck me, I can't think of a more soulless existence.

Feminine Mon 12-Nov-12 20:36:40

assosiationofmoelagents.org

Just to make it a bit easier smile

Feminine Mon 12-Nov-12 20:38:23

sorry ~typed too fast!

associationofmodelagents.org

WorraLiberty Mon 12-Nov-12 20:46:56

Can I just point out that there are plenty of bug ugly kids on TV and in films...so looks are pretty irrelevant here.

As long as they have character or something else that makes them stand out from the rest, they'll normally be accepted.

cutiesmum Mon 12-Nov-12 21:00:03

I've been a member of this site for about 3 days , maybe the 41 next to my name is the amount of posts on this thread?? Clearly you don't have much experience of this site either!

I'm a failure of a mother because I'm interested in child modelling LMAO I'm not going to even comment on that statement - pathetic!

Firawla thank you for the advice! I too don't understand why people are so against it! These peoples kids must be pretty bored becuase everything in life consists of some kind of judgement! You put your child in a football team, he's being judged on how well he can play compared to others!

Not going to right anything more on this website! Its like talking to a group of vultures, absolute vile people who think they have the right to judge and insult others - you must all be so perfect ha ha!

Firawla I will pm you thanks - maybe we can be terrible child expoiting parents together ha ha ha !

fosterdream Mon 12-Nov-12 21:11:06

I think the OP may be my SIL trying to rob yet another person this time her child instead of DH and me.

fosterdream Mon 12-Nov-12 21:12:02

Am I been unreasonable is where this post is and yes you are

Gigondas Mon 12-Nov-12 21:14:20

And it's write not right op.

Feminine Mon 12-Nov-12 21:16:44

Did you see my link op?

Its very helpful.

Teabagtights Mon 12-Nov-12 21:16:54

Will you put the money your kid earns in an Account for them or are you going to spend it on some more gold and Burberry?

littlemisssarcastic Mon 12-Nov-12 21:34:13

OP, My friend's DC are models with one of the agencies you have named, and tbh, although one of her DC only gets about 3 jobs a year out of it, the eldest DC is getting lots and lots of work.

So much, in fact, that her eldest DC has taken a lot of time off of school to attend castings and work. My friend now feels she has to say her eldest DC is not very well to get the time off of school with as little fuss as possible.
Her eldest DC is 7 btw, so not in high school yet, but I admit to feeling uncomfortable about it, even though her eldest is doing very well, and has modelled for a number of well known companies and is now appearing on tv.

Are you honestly prepared for the last minute rush to a casting? The constant email checking to see if your DC has been chosen, the waiting around at castings?

Have to say though that I've never heard of the three agencies you are specifically asking about, but then I am in the SE. Don't want to say anymore because don't want to out myself.

Also OP, how old is your LO?

littlemisssarcastic Mon 12-Nov-12 21:37:37

Teabagtights Isn't the money the child earns modelling paid directly to the child, into thier own name? Doesn't the child need an account in their own name for the pay to go into? Or am I being horribly naive?

I would be horrified if a child was modelling and the parent was spending the proceeds of the modelling!! shock shock

This has made me LOL, LOL.....(what is it with LOL that actually makes me want to flare my nostrils?)

My gorgeous long lashed son is constantly being told he should model. I cannot think of anything worse than having this lovely time watching cbeebies eating his pombears interrupted. But really, having to get into London at short notice, waiting around and having to be smiley on demand....? It's not going to happen. Good for you OP if
you think your child will enjoy it (and I'm really not being sarky) but
you are being VVVU posting this here....

Ps....did someone say gold & Burberry....??! Ooooo I could be
swayed wink

shemademedoit Tue 13-Nov-12 19:45:22

Ok. Now I have to confess.... I did hire son out at a child model once. A HAND model. Just his hands. For a film. He had to play a Bach prelude (he's 11 and not too bad on the piano). It took him hours of hard work. I don't imagine for a minute that he enjoyed all the work, but he enjoyed the day, and there's £2500 in an account for him that I could never have set aside otherwise.....surely this modelling business can't be all evil. Can it? sad

nadinewood Sat 01-Dec-12 23:47:02

Hi...late reply sorry! My DD was accepted by kitsch agency(kitschkids), chillikids, talent management (theyre in connection with models direct i believe), scallywags also. kitsch was the one we were going for...they said they are happy to wait for us to go to the photoshoots in jan as we couldnt make it just yet. so in that mean time we joined scallywags by paying monthly..but ive now left them as that agency is not for us...they have a lot of children same as babyshak and bizzy..but they do get some work!! I dont think i am going to go with kitsch though as we have just had a awesome reply from impact model agency. which is amazing. so proud (please dont get it mixed up with impact management ect) its in liverpool. They are sending me a info pack thing about the agency and lisencing ectect...when we go to see them ill see if its good for us...i know it will be just fine. we are very very lucky to have been accepted smile give them a try! X

Wheresmypopcorn Sun 02-Dec-12 00:09:59

My friend's DD has made a lot of money modelling - she is in loads of international campaigns . Just as well, my friend is a struggling single mum and her partner ran off and doesn't contribute. she is very beautiful and takes direction well which is key. a child who doesn't listen won't work a lot. however, the modelling is coming to an end as she is starting school and the school will not accept her being taken out of school to work.

Scheherezade Sun 02-Dec-12 00:36:55

I was told model agencies accept everyone, its how they make their money.

When an agency came to our town, every single kid in our school that went was accepted, including me. And I was NOT photogenic!

Scheherezade Sun 02-Dec-12 00:38:16

So no, sorry Nadine you aren't lucky to be accepted, you'll be lucky if they find anything where they pay you, rather than the other way around.

Valdeeves Sun 02-Dec-12 06:53:04

Aside from the exploitation - from an early age you are teaching your child that looks are very important. I've heard that often it can be like a production line and I saw a documentary where the photographers were just so brusque with the kids.
Your kid has got to really love having their photo taken - mine doesn't like it at all - there's no way he'd endure the studio set up.

Wheresmypopcorn Tue 04-Dec-12 20:17:22

I did once go with my nephew to a casting and it was really boring sitting around waiting for the next name to be called. Although I still don't understand why some people think child modelling is evil.

Sallyingforth Tue 04-Dec-12 21:02:45

So you paid scallywags monthly, got no work and now you are going to another agency.
I'm sorry you have not realised the reality of this business.

Annakin31 Wed 05-Dec-12 05:11:54

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ripsishere Wed 05-Dec-12 06:53:25

My DD was scouted when we lived in Thailand. We had five hours of hellish hot weather with her pretending to be the child of a random male actor with ghastly orange make up.
She quite liked the Macdonalds she was given, but didn't like the fake dad.
I spent her 50 quid on fags and beer.

Greythorne Wed 05-Dec-12 07:34:21

Nadinewood

Greythorne Wed 05-Dec-12 07:34:35

Sorry, words just failed me

Feminine Wed 05-Dec-12 07:56:30

Its not all based on looks.

Silly as that sounds.

Many child models have to also be pretty good actors. Its not always about the best looking child. Surprisingly many children cope better with the rejection that the Mothers! wink

I was a child model for a while, and an adult one for 17 yrs. Its a massive industry, with( as you can imagine) different requirements and rules.

I am a bit confused with op though. I sent her a very helpful link, I don't think she has even seen/said thanks!

Feminine Wed 05-Dec-12 07:58:50

As I said earlier, if you choose an agency that is with the AMA you will not be required to pay anything up-front.

They have a list of reputable child agencies to choose from.

NumericalMum Wed 05-Dec-12 08:28:58

As the older sister of a child model I would be very careful doing this. My sister grew up believing she was beautiful (she was) and better than me and all her friends because of it. She struggled with food disorders at a very young age and although she has turned out well now she has no self confidence anymore as she is no longer the cutie three year old she was back then. My daughter would be really good at acting and modelling but it would be a cold day in hell before I did this to her.

missrubywoo Fri 10-Jan-14 18:26:42

God, you poor love coming on here for some advice & getting a barrage of abuse from a load of bitter (& probably ugly) oddballs. I searched modelling reviews as I was thinking of entering my little girl & came a cross this useless thread. I am in two minds about whether to do it, i was thinking if I got some nice pictures to take away it's pretty much the same as taking my baby to have personal professional pics done & if anything comes out of it then thats a bonus. If I take her to a casting & decide its not right, I can just walk out. Don't judge until you try, I say! Good luck anyway x

Whiskwarrior Fri 10-Jan-14 18:29:43

Well done missrubywoo for dredging up a thread from two years ago, and then insulting the members of the site.

cupofcake Fri 10-Jan-14 19:32:28
LittleMissGreen Fri 10-Jan-14 20:00:32

Humph - thought it was going to be the OP coming back after all this time to tell us of the millions her DD had made!

Droves Fri 10-Jan-14 20:50:37

Why the hatred of child modeling ?

Child gets paid lots of money for doing next to nothing , except wearing clothes /endorsing products .

Not all models are beautiful , expressive is more important than looks at that stage.
Loads of child models go on to do acting , or photography themselves .

The money is a good start to uni funds , if your not born with a silver spoon.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe Fri 10-Jan-14 21:24:38

Teabagtights... Gold and Burberry? Was that really necessary? Did OP strike a nerve or something? I think you're out of order and your post makes you sound like a bit of a cow.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe Fri 10-Jan-14 21:25:34

Ooops... well spotted Whiskwarrior blush

PedlarsSpanner Fri 10-Jan-14 21:28:01

Oooh er we've been handbagged by missrubywoo

Welcome to Mumsnet!

Whiskwarrior Fri 10-Jan-14 21:31:09

By the looks of things missruby registered just to have a dig, then buggered off again - no other postings!

What an arse (probably ugly too grin)

Objection Sat 11-Jan-14 14:41:02

I applaud your bravery for posting this on AIBU!

(and YABU)

Objection Sat 11-Jan-14 14:49:47

I think most people's issues with child modelling is that children are being heavily involved in a world where you are judged and valued on your physical appearance. For kids, who are still developing their personalities, interests and self worth this is incredibly likely to make a lasting impact on their self - image.

DoYouLikeMyBaubles Sat 11-Jan-14 14:59:06

I was a child model for H&M and I would say don't do it. You're not doing it for your children, you're doing it for you.

cory Sat 11-Jan-14 15:00:38

Droves Fri 10-Jan-14 20:50:37
"Why the hatred of child modeling ?

Child gets paid lots of money for doing next to nothing , except wearing clothes /endorsing products ."

That would be my objection.

Takes up lots of time and teaches no useful skills unlike swimming lessons, finger painting or virtually any other activity they could be doing in the early years. Hours of hanging around in waiting areas doing very little.

Makes them focus on their looks.

And money earned by a child will have lost a lot of value by the time they go to uni- unlike skills acquired by the same child which will still be there.

Somebody suggested recently that my ds (early teens, handsome and with an outgoing personality) should try modelling. I looked at him narrowly and thought "now what would I rather have you concentrate on just now, the presentation of your skin or the presentation of your science homework?"

Shitehawke Sat 11-Jan-14 15:04:55

Op won't come back, she is probably sailing the med on the yacht her daughter she paid for through her little earner daughters 'career'.

GlassCastle Sat 11-Jan-14 15:07:06

My son was with Liz Smith in the early 90's and was scouted. With little babies it is as much about head shape and temperament as it is about looks.

He is now driving around in the car he brought with the money he earned. Poor little exploited baby.

He did it for 18 months until he got to the age where it was starting to interfere with our lifestyle (trying to prevent him getting bumps, wanting to cover up birthmarks which was not the message I wanted him to get), he enjoyed the positive feedback, the baby wranglers and fuss made of him.

Not everything about modelling is exploitation. I notice people who sneer at it still buy the products branded with baby images and i bet they don't write to companies in protest at this terrible exploitation.

I certainly wasn't a failed model/drama school parent. I have always had my own career that is nothing to do with the modelling industry. I was on PT hours so had the time to accompany him along with other family members.

We have amazing photographs of him (He was on the cover of three of the biggest parenting magazines and did several adverts) and he will laugh his head off at the outraged claims of exploitation on this thread.

Objection Sat 11-Jan-14 15:10:59

dammit, this is the first time I've Ben zombied!

Objection Sat 11-Jan-14 15:11:37

*been

Crowler Sat 11-Jan-14 15:11:53

God, you poor love coming on here for some advice & getting a barrage of abuse from a load of bitter (& probably ugly) oddballs.

LOL.

GlassCastle Sat 11-Jan-14 15:15:19

A little insight into the 'judgmental process' of the casting call.

I took my baby son to the HQ of what was then (and may still be) the biggest parenting magazine in the UK.

We went in to see the Editor who played and cuddled with him for ten minutes, looked through his book, told me he was lovely and then we went.

No different to introducing your child to anybody else. No trauma.

The next day we got the call. That was his first job.

He was never plastered in make up in any job because they just didn't do that then. When a client asked if he could be photographed with a naked bottom I refused. I refused on the one occasion they asked to use concealer on a birth mark. We then decided to stop as he was approaching 18 months and time for nursery with all the rough and tumble that may entail.

Some misconceptions on here.

Whiskwarrior Sat 11-Jan-14 15:22:15

Methinks the lady doth protest too much!

GlassCastle Sat 11-Jan-14 15:37:28

Not sure whether you are referring to me or not with that comment.

I am offering an explanation from somebody who has experienced it and most definitely the more positive aspects of the industry. And that goes for my son too. If people are going to stereotype parents of all child models as power crazed, attention seeking money hungry exploiters, then at least listen to somebody who knows what she is talking about.

Good child models are not necessarily the most 'beautiful'. that is not what they are really looking for. As in adult modelling it is about being photogenic, about temperament and being flexible regarding the way the business is run. Tantrummy children won't work no matter how photogenic they are. Snotty entitled parents will deprive their children of opportunities to make decent money. And my son made decent money-really decent money alongside holidays to some cool places with a photoshoot attached. They book a lot of stunt babies too and the regulations are very strict about how long a small child can work. They adhere to them too because the risk of the set being spot checked is high.

All of you with sixteen year olds working for minimum wage - many of these teenagers are being grossly exploited by their employers from cutting into their breaks and expecting them to start work fifteen minutes before paid time starts (Aldi) to taking away their bonus because they have just bought out another company (Cineworld) to not providing proper health and safety protection on their stock rooms (Aldi again)....I could go on.

Just because they are not so little doesn't make it right.

natwebb79 Sat 11-Jan-14 15:47:55

'Stunt babies'?! grin

Whiskwarrior Sat 11-Jan-14 15:48:48

Stunt babies would surely be the ones in the Evian adverts?

Bowlersarm Sat 11-Jan-14 15:51:20

grin @ bitter ugly oddballs.

What we thinking then that MissRuby is the Op?

Moominmammacat Sat 11-Jan-14 15:54:15

I think we used Norrie Carr about 15 years ago. Certainly didn't pay a fee. It is totally horrid. My DS did around three jobs inc one tv advert and he made around £1000 but it was really horrid, sitting around, waiting, no nappies for one job. Money was useful but there must be better ways.

Weelady77 Sat 11-Jan-14 15:59:32

Cutiesmum, my friends 3 kids went to an audition in Manchester for some kids modelling/casting agency in London I'm going to her house tonight I'll ask her which one!

It was only 1 of her kids who was going for the audition when they got there the photographers said the other 2 could join in the one who went for it never got accepted but the older child did, but she was told there wouldn't be any joining fees she just had to pay for the photos which she had to go for another session in Manchester for the whole day and it was £100,

I'm all for it I thought about it for my own dd but I've not got the time and dd is quite shy looking at cameras, I say just do your research on agency's smile

Whiskwarrior Sat 11-Jan-14 16:05:28

Duh! Ever heard of a) reading the full thread and b) zombie threads weelady

Weelady77 Sat 11-Jan-14 16:19:26

Sorry I'm just new too, don't know what you mean??

gamerchick Sat 11-Jan-14 16:39:09

Ah man this thread is ooooold!

As an aside I do like the modelling bods who get stroppy.. call everybody a bunch of plugs then flounce off. It's like a script.

Whiskwarrior Sat 11-Jan-14 16:43:50

weelady - no, you're not new. You've said as much on other threads. You're a recent name change with lots of posts.

But, to give you the benefit of the doubt.

Good form is to read the whole of a thread before posting, rather than just the first post. If you'd done that you would have picked up that this is an old thread. And that the thread had moved on a tad since the the opening.

A zombie thread is a thread that has been resurrected from the dead. I don't for the life of me know how/why this happens, but it does. You'll find that missrubyroo brought this thread back simply so she could have a pop at the posters on it.

Now you know for future reference...

GlassCastle Sat 11-Jan-14 16:43:51

hmm

Who just lately has been reanimating old threads? Seems to be becoming a sweet little old habit.

Whiskwarrior Sat 11-Jan-14 16:45:40

Glass - it's always happening, it's not new. It's definitely a weird thing to do though. And the person who does it never seems to notice it's an old thread.

The thing is, when you go to post on a zombie thread for the first time you get a big RED warning above the message box. There's no excuse for ignorance really.

Weelady77 Sat 11-Jan-14 16:48:12

Whisk warrior I'm new to posting I normally just browse when I've been bored, and someone has kindly told me what a zombie was smile

Whiskwarrior Sat 11-Jan-14 16:52:07

Aaah, apologies, Weelady - confusing you with another weelady!

Weelady77 Sat 11-Jan-14 17:07:00

It's fine smile

GlassCastle Sat 11-Jan-14 17:08:47

There's been a spate of particular thread reanimations recently with what appears to be trouble making intentions.

Whiskwarrior Sat 11-Jan-14 17:10:23

Glass - I've obviously missed them. Details, please!

Bahhhhhumbug Sat 11-Jan-14 17:29:00

You want to put your child forward for decorative purposes or to help sell products and you say we are 'vile' people hmm

Shall we have a campaign to bring back those sickening 'Bonny Babies' competitions on holiday sites while we're at it ?

WilsonFrickett Sat 11-Jan-14 17:44:01

I know it's a zombie thread but I NEED to know wtf a stunt baby is!

Athrodiaeth Sat 11-Jan-14 17:45:29

Of course they all said yes. It's got nothing to do with what your kid looks like. They just want your money. She'll sit on their books for all eternity while you keep shelling out in fees, and the chances of her getting a job amidst all the other thousands of kids cluttering the books are minimal.

Whiskwarrior Sat 11-Jan-14 17:46:22

Well, I feel sheepish. I've been played nicely, haven't I?

Viviennemary Sat 11-Jan-14 17:54:27

I think the main rule is not to hand over huge sums of money for photo portfolios and going on agency books and the like.

GlassCastle Sat 11-Jan-14 18:21:17

Oh stunt babies is just a coined phrase for the way they manage the legal requirements for working hours.

They are paid to help set up the shots/sets. Then the baby that will appear in the actual shot/Ad is brought in. They may use a LOT on a two day shoot. Then a 'Baby Wrangler' like a nanny/entertainer is brought in to both help look after them and to get them laughing and interacting.

The wranglers were all male on the shoots we were on and excellent at their job.

As for the 'decorative purposes' I take it you never ever buy products with these babies on do you? And you need to deregister from MN because what do you think the babies on the MN images are? They are models.

Do you watch TV? Those babies on TV -- many of them are models too like my son was.

We handed no money over. We had to pay for our book but that was deducted as part of the agency commission. We used Hal Jeyes for our models book. A really great photographer called Steve Shott did a lot of our shoots too. He was very popular.

TheBigJessie Sat 11-Jan-14 20:06:43

weelady77 I'm all for it I thought about it for my own dd but I've not got the time and dd is quite shy looking at cameras, I say just do your research on agency's

Each to their own, dear.

P.S. You've been on Mumsnet since September, and posting on this sub-forum since New Year's Eve. If you look under your profile details, you'll be able to find the exact details. smile

Bahhhhhumbug Sat 11-Jan-14 20:17:27

My ' babies ' are all in their thirties now. So yes you can take it that I never buy products with a picture of a baby on.

If I am going to be called collectively 'vile' I am entitled to counteract with my opinions on what I find vile.

Yes I watch TV but would not feel in the least bit bereft if I never saw another advert with a baby in it ever again. Would not worry me one jot. In fact I mute the TV when the ads come on and go and make a brew , put a wash in . whatever.

The OP was about a child and so was my response in any event , not about babies.

But yes I did used to find the 'Bonny Babies' 'competitions' awful even back in the day.

I don't pay any attention whatsoever to the babies pictured on Mumsnet as I am not on here for any baby related advice with no longer having any babies obviously.

I will go on any chat forum I please and deregister from it when and if I please.

HTHs.

Whiskwarrior Sat 11-Jan-14 20:36:11

Jessie - oh, buuuuuuurrrrrrrnnnnnn!

grin

LedareAnsley Sat 11-Jan-14 20:54:52

"You've been on Mumsnet since September, and posting on this sub-forum since New Year's Eve. If you look under your profile details, you'll be able to find the exact details"

grin

Whiskwarrior Sat 11-Jan-14 21:02:04

Think I'll have my fecking flowers back now, thanks, weelady

GlassCastle Sat 11-Jan-14 21:09:30

Yes but you condone the use of baby/child models and actors by using such forums. You cannot separate the two.

And surely you know that baby products featured baby models on them even in the late seventies and early eighties? My eldest is approaching thirty, my son old enough to be driving the car that the vile business bought him.

You fuel the industry whether it be overt or covert. It is disengenuous to state otherwise unless you dressed your kids in potato sacks and used no baby products at all. And whether you want to believe it or not, it is advertising that fuels the knowledge of the choices and the decisions you made as a purchaser of baby and children's products.

GlassCastle Sat 11-Jan-14 21:11:08

Posted too soon -

'Bonny baby' competitions I agree were ridiculous. Especially as the fashion up to the late 70's was for overfed looking babies. Not bonny at all.

Bahhhhhumbug Sun 12-Jan-14 12:29:17

I don't condone them though. I happen to live in a society where it is out there and cant help or avoid the fact it is on chat forums or the TV that I watch. It is ridiculous to try and force me to agree with you and with this industry by virtue of the fact I come into contact with it through no fault of my own. What would you like me to do ? move to a desert island where there is no TV and no child modelling agencies so that I can have a valid opinion on something.
Yes you can 'separate the two' otherwise vegetarians shouldn't eat in restaurants as they are condoning meat eating etc. Yet I know plenty who do and yet feel very strongly that people shouldn't eat meat and not just for themselves. There just aren't any (in my area at least and in general very few) vegetarian only restaurants.
Same with parenting chat forums they are in the main going to have child model pictures on their advertising.
I have had enormous support on Mumsnet with a severely poorly and disabled DGD and an adult son with health problems himself as a single dad too. Why should I not avail myself of that and in turn pass on advice to help them ,plus enjoy a bit of a chat / debate on a forum just because there happens to be the odd picture of a child or baby model on their advertising.
I have not , in short , the time nor the inclination to become a banner waving vigilante about child modelling and to be ensuring I completely boycott every aspect of life where it might feature. I have enough on my plate. But the fact still remains I don't like it and don't agree with it and I resent being called vile or bitter or a wannabee model myself or by proxy for my children or whatever , just because it is something I don't like personally.
I'm glad we agree on the Bonny Babies. My issue was more with the lining up of mums in competition with each other to decide who had the most beautiful child not the chubby aspect , though agree they were misguided with 'the chubbier the baby/child , the bonnier and healthier it was' in those days.

Weelady77 Sun 12-Jan-14 12:36:11

Bigjessie which makes me new lol!!! I've not been on here for years like the rest of you I'm not posting on every single thread! First comment on AIBU was New Year's Day on the piercing thread,

You seem to have a right bee in your bonnet with me!

Whiskwarrior Sun 12-Jan-14 13:04:22

I haven't been here for years either. You've been here for four months, that's hardly 'new'. And you've been posting all over other boards since then (I've checked too).

You know full well what the site etiquette is and when you go to post on a zombie thread for the first time you get a big red warning telling you all about zombie threads.

The fact that you then went and started a thread trying to garner sympathy through pretended ignorance is pretty low.

AIBU doesn't have a separate set of rules to the rest of MN. You behave here the same way you would on other boards.

But, each to their own.

Weelady77 Sun 12-Jan-14 13:08:20

Yeah I've posted on other boards I said that! But first time I posted on a thread here was New Years night!
Again yeah I've had a few months but not on it 24/7
I'm not a name changer like you said I told you I changed it once when I first joined as I used just my real name
I use my phone so I got no warning maybe because I wasn't the first to post on the old thread I don't know and I certainly didn't know what a zombie was!

Whiskwarrior Sun 12-Jan-14 13:13:44

And your reason for starting your little pity-party thread was...?

Weelady77 Sun 12-Jan-14 13:14:51

I asked the rules as I don't know them! Someone helpful posted them which I think some people ought to read!!

PedlarsSpanner Sun 12-Jan-14 13:26:39

Oooh handbags!

Whiskwarrior Sun 12-Jan-14 13:28:03

No, you didn't just ask for the rules. You also managed to get in that someone (me) was snotty with you. Which you also managed to get in on another thread last week, complaining about people being rude to you on the ear piercing thread.

If you can't stand robust debate, I'd suggest you stick to posting about vacuum cleaners and mops - you might not get so much 'rudeness' that way.

AIBU is well known for people disagreeing with one another - people get called names and bad language is used. It's not on to have little digs at people on other threads, whining that you're being picked on.

Weelady77 Sun 12-Jan-14 13:34:11

Whiskwarrior your probably right!!!
I cannot be bothered with arguing there's more to worry about in life about someone I've never met not liking me!

I'll stick to cleaning my house and let the playground bullies get on with itsmile

TheBigJessie Sun 12-Jan-14 13:35:25

Bee? No. But will counter accusations and inaccuracies. 'tis public forum. When you complain about people, they will give their side of the story. Right of reply is available to all.

Then, you will make yourself memorable, which will make it harder for you to claim new member.

Treated you as totally new to internet last week, and tried to give you guidance on how discussion works then.

Weelady77 Sun 12-Jan-14 13:36:56

Thebigjessie I'm just going to read from now on!

Whiskwarrior Sun 12-Jan-14 13:39:55

Playground bullies?

Interesting how disagreeing with someone and pulling them on bad form makes them 'Katie Hopkins-like' and 'playground bullies'.

But, each to their own...

Fluffycloudland77 Sun 12-Jan-14 13:42:19

Is ops daughter called Quinoa?

Weelady77 Sun 12-Jan-14 13:47:07

Or maybe zombies as old threads keep getting brought up!

Someonesensible52 Tue 04-Mar-14 13:11:30

My word you lot are hilarious with your rights to be so vile and judgemental but the pouncing on anyone who calls you on it.

Yes I know I joined only to criticise people who will now jump on me (because of course they have the right to criticise everyone, it's only wrong if you disagree with their harpy ways) and I'm resurrecting. an old thread.

A robust debate involves actually knowing what you are talking about and presenting the evidence for your viewpoint, everyone learns and therefore everyone is a winner. Also resurrecting. an old debate is usually a good thing. as new members will benefit from the varied views and old participants may view it with fresh eyes. Few here would last 5 seconds in a robust debate and should stick to petty opinion battles and trading ill resesearched judgement.

Oh my word I have just had a pop at Mumsnet members for their witchiness. That totally makes me the arse here...........

eastdulwichbedwetter Tue 04-Mar-14 13:50:12

My friend works in advertising for a major agency and has often used contractors for babies for FMCG goods.

For the main, the agency makes money because the expenses and fees aren't that much.

If you have more than one child it puts a burden on childcare because the hours are long and other children have to get dragged along for 12 hour days etc

Yes, they want nice looking children, but if you are seeking validation it's more about the child's behaviour being amenable and about them being happy and docile.

For most shoots several children are booked as they are essentially unreliable so chances are you wouldn't even be used.

Bottom line, it feeds parents narcissism (=bad) it involves lots of schlepping and hanging around (=not that enjoyable for children) it doesn't make money for the most part for the majority (=a bit futile then)

If used as a baby unlikely this will continue into childhood, so it's a small window. All that hassle and angst worth it?

My friend wants to use my youngest but I just laugh!

It's like men in porn, hardly any of them make money but there's always a queue of them to do it....

Saturnsearcher Tue 04-Mar-14 16:20:40

I'm not sure I like children modelling at all frankly

chocolatemademefat Tue 04-Mar-14 23:37:41

I'm well jell that you have a cute kid. Why oh why was I saddled with a pig ugly one that no modelling agency would be interested in? Oh wait - he's actually gorgeous and I didn't have him to make money. Hope she makes you a millionaire.

Robfordscrack Tue 04-Mar-14 23:45:21

Nothing wrong with asking about child modelling OP, ignore the judgy pants being hoiked.

YouAreTalkingRubbish Tue 04-Mar-14 23:51:28

ZOMBIE THREAD
ZOMBIE THREAD
ZOMBIE THREAD
ZOMBIE THREAD
ZOMBIE THREAD
ZOMBIE THREAD
ZOMBIE THREAD
ZOMBIE THREAD

Mimishimi Wed 05-Mar-14 06:24:21

I'm nit exactly sure what your question is but my advice would be never to go with an agency that requires you to pay them. Reputable agencies will take (an often large) percentage of the fees earned from placing your child in a job. The other ones make a living off hopeful parents paying thousands for portfolio photos etc.

cakemakerg Thu 12-Jun-14 09:50:51

Well guess what? I am new on here also. I 'fell' upon this thread looking for info on model agencies. I have a 17 yo dd who was scouted by a model agency when she was 5. Like many on here I decided that I wanted my daughter to have a childhood. But now she is hoping to make a bit of money to help her through uni. She still looks about 14 which is why I looked at Netmums. But the fact that I decided not to go ahead with the agency does NOT give me the right to make judgements on those who choose otherwise.
All these so called 'goody two shoes' mums who think that it is wicked to 'exploit' your kids in this way really, really need to have a good look in the mirror. This poor mum - who came here for advice - has been hounded by the vast majority of you. Well done to those who held the voice of reason in this thread. You are in the minority. These vicious women have been described as 'vultures'. I have no doubt that that will not affect them in any way. I am sure that they have called others far worse and thought nothing of it. I am going to describe them as something that SHOULD strike straight to their Earth Mother hearts. YOU ARE CYBER BULLIES!!! You disgust me! You are simply jealous cats! If you have a point to make you can make it without the nastiness. I just hope your wonderful DD's and DS's do not follow in your footsteps because they will just be called scum.
I have joined netmums for no other reason than to make this post. You obviously do not have a life or any ambition for your kids other than to make yourself look good by pulling others down. NASTY NASTY NASTY!!!!!

wineoclocktimeye Thu 12-Jun-14 10:05:04

I'm delighted you joined netmums, I'm sure you'll be very happy there grin

Actifizz Thu 12-Jun-14 10:18:50

grin

cakemakerg Whilst you may have valid points (not red the thread so couldn't say) at least try to get name of the website right confused

mrstigs Thu 12-Jun-14 10:39:22

Do people ever work out that joining to shout abuse is neither original nor effective? Seriously, many many people have joined before to shower us all is their 'well thought out opinions of our behaviour' and the only person getting upset is them.
If you don't like it don't contribute, please don't feel the need to convert us to the fluffy side.

gordyslovesheep Thu 12-Jun-14 10:45:58

you sound like a bag of laughs grin you will LOVE netmums x

cakemakerg Thu 12-Jun-14 13:35:43

Dear God !!
'Fluffy side'? I'm talking common decency.

Abuse? Have you seen what people have been saying before me? I didnt see you popping up then shouting ABUSE!

Twinkletwinkle - seriously? You commented to say I got the name wrong?

gordyslovesheep I have many friends from all walks of life, rich, super rich, council house, unemployed, famous, Big Issue sellers, highly intelligent, and others that are just happy being who they are - and I enjoy great times with all of them. I choose to mix with those that have respect for others and enough self esteem that they do not have to put others down to feel good about themselves.

My point is - by all means discuss and give your opinions. Many of the bullys on here are clearly intelligent and I am sure could argue me into a fantastic headlock. But with your intellect and clever repartee you SHOULD know where to draw the line. Are you of the opinion that if you are sat behind a computer you can write whatever you want and no-one gets hurt? I think we have heard enough on the news about this sort of behavior in children to know that this is just simply not right. But behavior like this on a website dedicated to mums??? Think intelligently. What sort of example are you setting?

Somewhere in the thread it has been said that this particular area is known for 'saying what you think'. Those of you who think that what has gone on before my post is acceptable and do not want to be 'fluffy' will be the ones who respond negatively to my comments. Everyone else will understand.

I am sure that there will be some that will want to pick apart my comments. Well go on - knock yourself out - have fun. At least you now have the knowledge of how you appear to people looking in and any future nastiness will simply vindicate what I am saying. Just thank goodness that its all anonymous and you can hide behind your computer screen.

No - mumsnet is definiately not for me.

Disclaimer spoken at high speed
Any spelling mistakes are purely my own and I take full responsibility for them. Ditto any grammatical errors. Anyone who feels the need to focus on these areas when there is a much bigger subject being debated shall be deemed to be a first class a**e.
Debaters are welcome, but please be respectful.

Why would your first and second posts on a thread be to drag up old threads, get the name wrong then say that the forum isn't for you?

I'm not having a go. I'm genuinely confused

silveroldie2 Thu 12-Jun-14 13:49:46

Oh the irony grin

Have fun at netmums. We don't really need the 'clutching handbag' sort in here.

Oh and we're big scary cyber bullies wail so you'd best be keeping away from those awful nasty mummysnetters who don't agree with everything that you have to say.

candycoatedwaterdrops Thu 12-Jun-14 13:59:32

cakemakerg You joined a forum, bumped up an old thread to tell us we're all scum and vicious vultures and then have the audacity to call us bullies?! LOL grin

"Disclaimer spoken at high speed
Any spelling mistakes are purely my own and I take full responsibility for them. Ditto any grammatical errors. Anyone who feels the need to focus on these areas when there is a much bigger subject being debated shall be deemed to be a first class a**e.
Debaters are welcome, but please be respectful."

I think you would fit right in here. You're funny. And, you could have written "arse" so that's good too. Give us a whirl, you sound a laugh.

cakemakerg Thu 12-Jun-14 14:05:01

ElizaDolittle2
I was genuinely looking for info on model agencies. I found this thread I was was appalled about that way the original poster was treated. I have taught my children to stick up for anyone that is being bullied. TBH I hadnt realised how old the original post was - I am very new to this. But I was so incensed by it that I felt I needed to stick up for this lady, and the others that have also been shot down when asking very simple questions on this thread. Yes - I got the name wrong - why is that such a big issue?? I have hovered over other forums before and never have I seen the nastiness that was on here - and a mums forum at that. Maybe I am naive. Maybe other forums are just the same and I havnt come across it yet. But does that make it right when we all have heard of at least one local kid that committed suicide because of this sort of behaviour?
Silveroldie2
What is ironic? That I am saying something that should have been said 2 years ago?? Do you disagree with what I am saying?

cakemakerg Thu 12-Jun-14 14:06:38

MrsTerryPratchett
No - I dont think I fit in. But thanks.:-)

cakemakerg Thu 12-Jun-14 14:09:15

mrscumberpatch
hv u read the whole thread. I'm not asking people to agree with everything I say. But yes, I am giving my opinion. You need to take cyber bullying seriously.

<sulks> but I like a little cut and thrust on threads. And, there are nicer areas. Try Chat or similar but not the Doghouse, it's bedlam in there. Having lots of opinions if good. I don't agree with everyone on here by a long chalk.

*is good FFS. I need your disclaimer.

cakemakerg Thu 12-Jun-14 14:11:09

You see MrsTerryPratchett - I already have one person telling me I should leave and take my handbag with me...
Not exactly welcoming.

cakemakerg Thu 12-Jun-14 14:12:08

MrsTerryPratchett
Feel free to take total rights to my disclaimer ;-)

Oh, don't expect welcoming. This is more a firm handshake, pat on the back place than a tea and biscuits welcome one. I got pummeled on my first foray here. Really shat on. I dusted myself off namechanged and got on with it. I have had some great support and met some RL friends on here. You should see what happens when there is a need. Google Woolly Hugs or go to the Sleep topic. People here are great when you need them.

cakemakerg Thu 12-Jun-14 14:14:13

BTW I did make it quite clear that not everyone on here are cyberbullies - so I am not accusing y'all. But those who have a nerve touched by my comments......

I read the whole thread years ago. My views haven't changed in that I don't particularly like it- but what other folk get up to is their business. Not mine.

You can't just throw in 'cyber bullying' when people are telling you that you're being a bit ridiculous.

You've barrelled in here, brought up an ancient thread and then because somebody had the audacity to tell you that it's not quite the done thing you started some diatribe about cyber bullies blah blah blah.

All just a bit OTT.

Mumsnet can be a great an encouraging place and hilarious and political. Just not on 3 year old threads!!!! Forum etiquette out the window!!

cakemakerg Thu 12-Jun-14 14:16:49

Great convo Mrs T but I think I will be leaving very soon. I'm not into the soriety initiation thing - either you take me or leave me.
lol - now they will all be shouting LEAVE THEN at their computer screens.

AlpacaLypse Thu 12-Jun-14 14:18:28

Anyone who wants to talk about the ethics of resurrecting old threads, there is a thread in Site Stuff [http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/site_stuff/2105010-Can-we-put-a-lock-on-old-threads?msgid=47627789 here]

Might be better to talk there than keep this one high on the Active Convos list.

cakemakerg Thu 12-Jun-14 14:22:39

Mrs C
I havnt a clue what u are talking about...
I 'threw in' cyber bullying because thats what people were doing. I did that in my very first thread - not because people were telling me I was being ridiculous. No one had contacted me at that point. I wasnt even a member. I was just sticking up for all those who had to put up with it all. Are you a mum? Wouldnt you like it if your DD or DS had someone to stick up for them if someone was bullying them?
No one has told me its not the done thing until your last post. I think you are confusing me with someone else.

It's not the done thing on any forum... Anyhoo, that's by the by...

cakemakerg Thu 12-Jun-14 14:30:06

Candycoated
I bumped into the forum first - then joined.
I was not calling you all vultures. That was the original poster in retaliation for the way she was being treated and it was clearly aimed at the bullies - I was quoting her.
I was DID say that any adult that thinks it is okay to bully online was pretty scummy, and I will stick with that.
But if you are NOT one of the bullies then it doesnt apply to you.

HoneyDragon Thu 12-Jun-14 14:30:52

So you've googled, come across a old thread on Mumsnet and had the massive ARSE about it in a brilliantly subjective manner and decided that everyone on Netmums are cyber bullies.

Cool grin

cakemakerg Thu 12-Jun-14 14:31:18

Mrs C
What is not the done thing?

calculatorsatdawn Thu 12-Jun-14 14:41:38

If it helps cakemakerg I'm lovely

Possibly a big part of your issue is that you were googling modelling agencies for children and came across this thread so presumably it's something that you're interested in and were quite put out when it turns out the majority of people who commented on the post think it's a pretty naff thing to do.

Maybe if you'd been googling other forms of child employment and found people on here disagreeing with an OP seeking agencies that would help her DC to get factory work you might have thought differently.

Have you seen the red chair thing in Graham Norton? That's the TV equivalent of AIBU. AIBU is not MN.

cakemakerg Thu 12-Jun-14 14:42:40

Oh HoneyDragon
How many times do I have to say it.
In my very first post I said that there were people on this thread who were being helpful to the original poster and were injecting a voice of reason.
No - not everyone on here is a cyberbully. Can people please stop accusing me of saying that.
MY COMMENTS ARE NOT AIMED AT EVERYONE
is that quite clear now?
But I hope that those that were involved in pulling this lady down got to see the comments I made and that it might just strike a nerve.
I was hoping that the people who agree with me that we should all be more careful about what is said to people on here AS WE WOULD LIKE OUR CHILDREN TO DO would feel strong enough to come out from under the heavy weight of the bullies that had dominated a lot of this thread.
Although, now I realise that the thread is old, they probably wont.

cakemakerg Thu 12-Jun-14 14:47:31

Hi Calculator
No - I wasnt upset about the negativity towards child modelling - I decided against for my DD's. My eldest DD is now 17 and she simply want to earn money for uni. Its one option.
It was the personal attacks on the original poster. But now I realise how old this thread is they are probably not on here anyway - 'my bad' I think is what the teenagers say now.
scratches head having got a clue about AIBU or MN - way over the top of my head.

HaroldLloyd Thu 12-Jun-14 14:52:31

Hugs cakey grin

WaitingForMyMam Thu 12-Jun-14 14:57:29

I love how the criticism has been construed as jealousy, as if we are all so consumed with our/our children's looks that the anti-modelling arguments simply could not be driven by anything else.

I don't like baby/child modelling. I would be perfectly happy for my kids to do it when they reach an age where they can think for themselves. Before that, it's my job to protect them and I don't think child modelling is doing that.

HoneyDragon Thu 12-Jun-14 14:58:49

Or some people had different opinions on the subject and the op purposely chose to post in a forum called Am I Being Unreasonable.

You are, like the people you have chosen to attack and call cyber bullies, posting from a subjective opinion.

And it's an old thread so people may not have the right to reply.

Not that they should have to. Because they were not doing anything wrong. You just didn't like what they had to say.

You did not stipulate any posters any posters comments, you chose a generic you. You chose to register on a site to be vitriolic. You did not think before you posted and you have been as equally offensive and rude as people you are calling bullies.

I'm frankly disgusted at your comments on child suicide too, horrible comment and completely facile.

Perhaps if you'd bothered to THINK before you posted you wouldn't have to keep back tracking or doing the faux bewilderment thing.

You fucked up and you were rude. It happens.

madbutnormal Thu 12-Jun-14 15:10:37

This is an old thread
I can remember the user name and topic from weeks back

<whispers> does she realise she's not actually on netmums?

OP this part of Mumsnet really is like a fight club sometimes. You can't change its character just because you don't like it.

cakemakerg Thu 12-Jun-14 15:41:37

Honey
I dont profess to understand forum politics about where the posting is made and what prompted the original poster to do it.

Faux bewilderment thing? Some people are actually genuine. Cynical much?

You are right - child suicide is disgusting. But what I find more disgusting is that I had to use such a phrase to underline what I was saying because I got the impression that the point was being missed.

What these people were doing was no different to what had happened to many of these kids.

Yeah I fucked up - I have said that - but you said it again for me - so thanks.

I dont have a problem with people saying they dont like child modelling. What I dont like is the personal attacks that were being said with it.

Quite frankly I am amazed at how many people feel insulted by this. Clearly there are some here who are giving me some support - and thank you :-)

Waiting
If you have a different opinion to someone then thats fine. Personal attacks take it to a different level. (just to clarify I am not saying that you have attacked me). The posters at the early stage of this thread were accusing her of buying her burberry with her DD's potential earnings and just using her to make her millions. Its not necessary. Say that you feel it takes away from your DD's childhood. Say that there are nicer things for kids to be doing. If thats their opinion then fine. But to chase her away and then laugh amongst themselves at how clever they were. It smacks of playground bullies to me...

Anyway - its all a mute argument now as they have clearly long departed from the forum as will I.

Just chat amongst yourselves - talk about me if you must, pat your backs and say what clever people you are and how I just couldnt handle the heat. But the truth is - I have kids to collect from school and a life to live.
Thank you for the hugs Harold
Thank you for being a nice person calculator
Thank you for being my BFF on mumsnet Mrs T
Ta'ra and toodaloo

sillystring Thu 12-Jun-14 16:14:21

Why does this crappy thread keep getting resurrected? This is the 2nd time it's happened.

sillystring Thu 12-Jun-14 16:15:18

...and I think you mean "moot" argument. If it were "mute", no one would say anything...

cakemakerg Thu 12-Jun-14 17:01:32

Read my disclaimer sillystring - you are officially an a**e

cakemakerg Thu 12-Jun-14 17:04:50

btw sillystring - it was meant as a joke. This is now boring. How do I get off here??

PrincessBabyCat Thu 12-Jun-14 17:13:41

Child modeling is fine as long as you stop when the child says they no longer want to do it, as with any sport or extra curricular.

cakemakerg You get off by pushing the X button. Duh.

sillystring Thu 12-Jun-14 19:19:43

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

cakemakerg Fri 13-Jun-14 10:54:57

Thanks Princess
Found it.
And 'duh' sillystring - if its this easy to get off this long dead thread then why are you still on it making comments as its so crappy? Just get off it. Run, quick - escape while you can! There are plenty of other threads that I'm sure could use your input and take up your valuable time....

I know you can use expletives here - I learn quickly. I was simply quoting my disclaimer because I am sure you are the sort of person that had I used ARSE then you would have pulled me for not quoting my disclaimer exactly.
Oh and I'm a troll because I stood up for someone. Again, I didnt see anyone calling out the earlier posters as trolls for their inflammatory remarks.
As I said - at least I have let those of u that think this is acceptable see how you look to people looking in.

And NO I do not think that everyone on here are bullys - but there are plenty seem very twitchy from the nerve I have touched.

Have fun in your little community.

Try not to draw blood.

grin

DeepThought Fri 13-Jun-14 12:48:42

Oooh a Frothing Berserker grin

If you don't want to stay. Why then do you keep coming back? confused

HaroldLloyd Fri 13-Jun-14 13:16:20

She can't resist our charms really.

QueenofallIsee Fri 13-Jun-14 13:28:01

Careful cakemaker, I hear that cakes can fall flat if made when stressed..that would never do

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