to think that you shouldn't be staring down my shirt?

(194 Posts)
TulisaLover Thu 08-Nov-12 23:00:24

I was leaning over sorting out some papers on my desk today and a colleague came up to my desk and started talking about a meeting the team were having. When I looked up I immediately realised where he had been looking and he got a bit flustered. I put my hand on my top to hold it against me and gave him a look of disdain back. Am i being unreasonable to think that any reasonable man would have averted their eyes? What would you do?

WorraLiberty Thu 08-Nov-12 23:02:06

I'm a woman and I can't help looking at boobage on display sometimes.

It's only part of your body.

Fakebook Thu 08-Nov-12 23:02:08

I'd wear tops that covered my boobs, even when I bent over.

Marzipanface Thu 08-Nov-12 23:04:45

Cover boobs. Men will have a quick look. I probably would despite being female and straight.

TulisaLover Thu 08-Nov-12 23:05:07

Erm...why should I wear different tops? I like the one I was wearing - I get hot otherwise.

kinkyfuckery Thu 08-Nov-12 23:06:20

If you will wear tops that are revealing, you have to expect that sometimes people will look. He didn't act or say anything inappropriate, did he?

I'd have a look too. Maybe you've got a nice rack.

TulisaLover Thu 08-Nov-12 23:07:10

No he didn't do anything else - I think i made it quite clear I knew where he had been looking and I wasn't happy about it.

BeauNeidel Thu 08-Nov-12 23:07:41

I would probably look as well. Any 'flash' of skin, whether intentional or not, is going to make me look. Same as anything unexpected happening is probably going to make me look!

That said, ogling ain't nice.

WorraLiberty Thu 08-Nov-12 23:07:45

If you like it then wear it

If it shows your boobs then you're obviously cool with that...and why shouldn't you be? It's just another body part afterall.

But I don't see why you should take it badly when someone looks at said body part?

If was covered it couldn't be seen, could it?

Fakebook Thu 08-Nov-12 23:09:05

Well if you like wearing tops that show your boobs off then expect people to look.

squeakytoy Thu 08-Nov-12 23:09:23

" I like the one I was wearing - I get hot otherwise."

riiiiiiight... so an extra button done up would make you get hotter??? grin

Cozy9 Thu 08-Nov-12 23:10:11

U shouldn't be wearing revealing clothing if you don't want parts of your body you don't want other people to see to be revealed.

TulisaLover Thu 08-Nov-12 23:10:21

OK seems I am being unreasonable - but he was definitely ogling.

WorraLiberty Thu 08-Nov-12 23:10:36

I remember sitting at a school Governor meeting last summer, surrounded by 8 women with mahoosive knockers spilling out of various vest tops and dresses.

It was hard to look anywhere else to be honest and all power to them...they looked nice and cool grin

ChippingInLovesAutumn Thu 08-Nov-12 23:10:59

Don't flaunt your boobs and expect everyone else to 'avert' their eyes - wear clothing appropriate for the office. Not that tricky. No matter how hot it is an extra inch of top across your chest isn't going to make you overheat hmm

Fakebook Thu 08-Nov-12 23:11:59

Sorry I just saw your nickname. < rolls eyes >.

Bunbaker Thu 08-Nov-12 23:12:14

Sorry, but it's human nature to look if someone displays their wares (even if it is unintentional).

I think you have unrealistic expectations about men averting their eyes.

If you don't want people to look wear less revealing clothes.

apostropheuse Thu 08-Nov-12 23:15:17

You can certainly wear whatever you want to wear, but you're the one who's choosing to reveal body parts that you don't want anyone to look at.
Seems a bit daft.

Just show what you want to show and cover what you don't want to be looked at.

TulisaLover Thu 08-Nov-12 23:15:52

I've accepted I'm being unreasonable fakebook. What's wrong with my nickname??? She's a brilliant role model.

squeakytoy Thu 08-Nov-12 23:19:49

a brilliant role model for what exactly??? grin

Fakebook Thu 08-Nov-12 23:20:14

...Right. smile.

TulisaLover Thu 08-Nov-12 23:22:26

squeaky - for people everywhere. She's shown you can rise out of the ghetto and make a life for yourself.

MrsCantSayAnything Thu 08-Nov-12 23:25:36

People will look they just will. I look when flesh is on show even if I'm not attracted.

A Dad on our school run always has hairy cleavage on show and I just feel like my eyes GO there whether I want them to or not.

Fakebook Thu 08-Nov-12 23:30:14

Does the UK really have ghettos though? and she hasn't really risen much either. She's a talentless bint who has a sex tape. Sounds like every other attention seeking whore that's a celebrity these days. Hardly something for young women to aspire to.

The ghetto? She grew up in Belsize Park!

squeakytoy Thu 08-Nov-12 23:37:31

pmsl at "the ghetto".. we dont really have ghettos in london..

she drinks, smokes, takes drugs, and somehow gets really shit music in the charts, she is no role model..

Cozy9 Thu 08-Nov-12 23:37:46

Maybe the man should walk over to your desk with his shirt unbuttoned to the midriff and see if you look at his chest.

ecclesvet Fri 09-Nov-12 00:22:26
maddening Fri 09-Nov-12 06:37:46

If a bloke wears tights trousers and gets a builders bum you''ll prob look - not as it's sexy (far from it) but just as it's there.

I'm more offended if I've got my puppies on display & someone doesn't look grin

Seriously though, I don't get people who wear revealing clothing then complain if people look. Sometimes you just can't help it.

And pmsl at the ghetto comment.

Cynner Fri 09-Nov-12 06:56:16

sighs I am less than 5ft tall..someone is always looking down my shirt..

HecatePropylaea Fri 09-Nov-12 07:11:07

If a woman wears something that reveals her boobs - in a show almost to the nipple, jiggling flesh type of way, then I look. Same as if a bloke is wearing tight trousers and you can see the bulge.

I can't help it blush my eyes are drawn to it. The more I try to avoid looking, the more I look.

I think it's cos I know I really shouldn't look. iyswim. The more I try to ignore the heaving bosom or the trouser snake, the less I can.

It's really very embarrassing.

KenLeeeeeee Fri 09-Nov-12 07:20:13

TBH I'm kind of uncomfortable with the ethos of "if you wear a low cut top, you should expect people to look". I reserve the right not to be ogled and made to feel uncomfortable regardless of what I'm wearing.

Bunbaker Fri 09-Nov-12 07:23:21

You are right Ken, but you have to take human nature into account. Like most other posters on here if there is lots of flesh on display I can't help but look. It's the way of the world whether you like it or not.

KenLeeeeeee Fri 09-Nov-12 07:30:03

True, Bunbaker. I guess even my eyes would be drawn to it! I think it's more the idea that someone HAS to be ok about people looking iyswim. So I accept that people will look at my chest if I'm wearing something revealing, but it doesn't mean I have to be ok about that.

I'm not expressing myself very well at all, am I! Too early in the day and not enough coffee!

CarolynKnappShappey Fri 09-Nov-12 07:38:01

Leave Tulisa alone! She didn't "make a sex tape" in that sense - she made a poor choice of boyfriends and he then acted like a total git. She called him on it rather admirably, and pointed out that she herself had done nothing wrong apart from shagging a total scumbag.

On the OP I agree that it is human nature to gawp inadvertantly if there's a load of flesh on display, but since we weren't there, we don't know whether her colleague crossed the line into active leering.

ClitmassIsCumming Fri 09-Nov-12 07:38:08

The guy LOOKED down your top he didn`t GRAB your tits did he, crikey you can`t be offended when people look if they can be seen, and if Tulisa is a role model then kids today haven`t a hope in hell...confused

MrsBucketxx Fri 09-Nov-12 07:45:10

this sounds like a stealth boast to me "wo is me i have s great rack and someone looked" hmm

cover up polo necks and funky jackets are in this season.

GhostShip Fri 09-Nov-12 07:50:34

A role model hahahahaha

MulledWineOnTheBusLady Fri 09-Nov-12 07:58:00

Fucksake, YANBU. Can't fucking believe this thread.

I'm assuming you weren't wearing a Moulin Rouge corset, as others seem to be assuming? No? Then you have a perfect right to expect people to politely avert their eyes if you happen to briefly be in a position where norkage is in point. We can't all walk around permanently swathed to the neck. I would glance at a sudden flash of flesh too, it's human nature, but I wouldn't gawp for minutes on end until the other person looked up.

You did exactly the right thing though, in letting him know you had noticed. If he's a decent human being he'll have been a bit embarrassed at being caught and be more polite next time.

UltraBOF Fri 09-Nov-12 08:00:30

<still crying at 'ghetto' grin>

WorraLiberty Fri 09-Nov-12 09:26:38

We can't all walk around permanently swathed to the neck. I would glance at a sudden flash of flesh too, it's human nature, but I wouldn't gawp for minutes on end until the other person looked up

How do you know he 'gawped for minutes on end'? confused

The OP looked up and realised the guy had been looking MulledWine...exactly as you would have done yourself.

TulisaLover Fri 09-Nov-12 09:29:01

Thank you mulled. I knew I was not being unreasonable - the night time crowd almost had me convinced that I was though. And at all those who think Tulisa is a poor role model - who do you think is today if not her? I think she is the epitome of femininty.

MulledWineOnTheBusLady Fri 09-Nov-12 09:30:46

The OP said in a subsequent post that "he was definitely ogling." I have to take that at her word; none of us were there.

WorraLiberty Fri 09-Nov-12 09:32:40

Mulled she was looking down so couldn't possibly have known

But I think this whole Tulisa thing is a wind up anyway...

MulledWineOnTheBusLady Fri 09-Nov-12 09:34:04

YANBU at all about the top, OP, but your idealising of celebs is definitely U. grin

MulledWineOnTheBusLady Fri 09-Nov-12 09:35:38

Like I say, Worra. We have to take her at her word, we weren't there. If she reckons she has reason to think the guy was ogling, that is what we must assume. Otherwise we could just go round putting "I don't believe you" under every thread, couldn't we.

TulisaLover Fri 09-Nov-12 09:36:34

I think a lot of people here are probably the type who engineer situations where they can look down tops mulled. They are probably constantly dropping pencils for others to pick up, o r asking for 'advice' on paint colours which requires their victim to bend over. It's shameful.

MulledWineOnTheBusLady Fri 09-Nov-12 09:38:01

Bwaha!

Well, I can partially excuse myself on the basis that everyone sounds like a fucking idiot when they talk about celebrities to me, I suppose...

WorraLiberty Fri 09-Nov-12 09:38:17

No I don't think we must assume something that doesn't make sense grin

The OP has said she 'looked up' and immediately realised where he had been looking...so she couldn't possibly know if he had glanced like you or I would...or if he had been stood there ogling.

But perhaps I'm being far too sensible for a Friday morning

My normal drunken crap will resume this evening wine

MulledWineOnTheBusLady Fri 09-Nov-12 09:39:26

Ooh, well, don't mind if I do wine

WorraLiberty Fri 09-Nov-12 09:40:25

Just don't drop it and expect me to mop it up for you shock

MulledWineOnTheBusLady Fri 09-Nov-12 09:41:24

<peers down Worra's top>

I'm torn. I agree that a person should be able to wear what ever they want, and I agree that it's natural to notice boobs/bum etc... But I don't understand why anyone would wear something 'revealing' unless they were ok with people having a quick scope.
Maybe I'm odd; if I'm wearing something lowcut, it's mainly because I want you to look grin

TulisaLover Fri 09-Nov-12 09:45:43

So worra, I still haven't had an answer from those that think iabu ad to what my reaction should have been.... should I have just smiled and continued with my sorting whilst he git a free show?

ShatnersBassoon Fri 09-Nov-12 09:46:02

It's human nature to look at things you're not expecting to see. Glimpses of bare flesh will draw attention, whether it's a man's or a woman's.

I've looked at Tulisa's cleavage when I've seen her on TV. Don't say you haven't, op...

TulisaLover Fri 09-Nov-12 09:50:08

No I haven't gawped at her cleavage shatners. I wouldn't even if I was on cake and thought I had two weeks before she noticed I was looking :-)

WorraLiberty Fri 09-Nov-12 09:50:56

I think your reaction was fine...no problem there at all.

ShatnersBassoon Fri 09-Nov-12 09:57:45

I haven't gawped at Tulisa's chest either, just looked when the opportunity presented itself.

Was your colleague doing an open-mouthed gawp, or just looking?

Fakebook Fri 09-Nov-12 10:27:31

There are plenty of other women and girls out there who are far more suited to being role models for women. Take the 14 year old girl in Pakistan who was shot by the Taliban for having views and speaking out for women's rights to education. Even in a war zone (more dangerous than a ghetto, incase you don't know) she still carried on going to school to get herself an education.

Compared to that girl (and many others like her in the world), Tulisa fucking constavalos ( or whatever the fuck her name is) is NOTHING.
If you think a minor pop star with a sex tape is a brilliant role model, then you need to widen your source of information and literature because reading Hello! Isn't really going to tell you about the REAL role models out in the world.

BarredfromhavingStella Fri 09-Nov-12 10:31:43

I also feel quite offended if my pups are clearly on show & they don't get at least a peek, why else would I be flashing the flesh?? grin

He's a bloke, cleavage was on show what did you expect him to do? hmm At least he had the good grace to appear embarrassed.....

WhenShallWeThreeKingsMeetAgain Fri 09-Nov-12 10:39:42

OP, you are being very naive. You'd better start reading up on human nature rather than thinking Tulisa is a role model.

fluffyraggies Fri 09-Nov-12 10:44:54

My knockers are constantly being gawped at. Doesn't bother me at all grin

If it did bother me i'd wear higher necklines.

TulisaLover Fri 09-Nov-12 10:45:06

I don't watch the news fakebook because it upsets me - half of it is propaganda for the 'credit card generation' according to my DP anyway. As far as I'm concerned, Tulisa is inspiring young people - it's a wonderful thing to criticise isn't it. Come back to me when you've developed a heavenly fragrance or a single to match 'I need you'.

lovebunny Fri 09-Nov-12 10:48:45

keep yourself covered if you don't want to be stared at. take responsibility for yourself. check your clothes won't sag or gape, revealing more than you intend.
if you put yourself on display deliberately, people are entitled to have a good look. you asked for it when you chose to dress like that.

YerMaw1989 Fri 09-Nov-12 10:49:52

This is quite difficult to answer without being there. Only you know if you were dressed with a teeny bit of cleavage or having boob spillage.
However I understand that once you get past a certain cup size you can sometimes under estimate how much is showing, I always have to be reminded by DP/mates like 'your poppin out' blush.

TulisaLover Fri 09-Nov-12 10:50:13

'if you put yourself on display deliberately, people are entitled to have a good look'

But this is society in a nutshell isn't it. Entitlement culture and I'm sick of it.

MorrisZapp Fri 09-Nov-12 10:54:59

Oh man. I was on the bus the other day and a guy (tidy, polite, clean looking) turned round and you could see three inches of hairy bum crack. I was aghast.

I mean, Christ, you don't want to look, but it was THERE.

Mate, hoik them up.

MorrisZapp Fri 09-Nov-12 10:56:30

Ha ha ha at Tulisa 'developing a fragrance'.

Why of course. That's how kids should better themselves. By developing fragrances.

snuffaluffagus Fri 09-Nov-12 10:56:42

Ahaha, OP you're hilarious. Take THAT fakebook. I await your new single and perfume with high excitement..

Anyone for a biscuit ?

TulisaLover Fri 09-Nov-12 10:56:55

I was probably 'popping out' yermaw. I'm quite busty and wear pretty underwear because I like to feel good, but it's not a free for all. I'm not saying 'Come and have a look lads', I'm sorting out papers in my office confused

Fakebook Fri 09-Nov-12 10:58:10

I don't watch the news fakebook because it upsets me

<snorts>

Yes, close your eyes and cover up your ears to the bad things happening in the world and carry on your life in ignorance. Very sad that people like you exist. You can't call someone a role model when you don't even know what else is happening in the world. Words fail me.

Fakebook Fri 09-Nov-12 11:00:07

Oh man, I completely bypassed that fragrance shit. Yeah. That's me told hmm

YerMaw1989 Fri 09-Nov-12 11:00:40

True, but your at work a place where you need to be covered up really.
its not just to prevent 'ogling' I'm a straight, woman I don't want mammaries flapping everywhere grin.

If they can see your underwear you're probably revealing too much. get those cheap vest things from primark? I'm an F if I didn't I would spend my life looking a right tart.

KenLeeeeeee Fri 09-Nov-12 11:01:21

Oh dear, OP. I was with you -- and overlooking the Tulisa admiration-- until you came out with:

I think a lot of people here are probably the type who engineer situations where they can look down tops mulled. They are probably constantly dropping pencils for others to pick up, o r asking for 'advice' on paint colours which requires their victim to bend over. It's shameful.

TulisaLover Fri 09-Nov-12 11:02:46

'Very sad that people like you exist.'

So you think that people who would rather just concentrate on living their own life rather than tut tutting on the sofa saying 'It's so awful what's happened in Myanmar to Aung san suu kyi' don't have a right to live? Do you not see how pretentious that is? No - words fail me.

Feminine Fri 09-Nov-12 11:03:49

op it is perfectly normal for humans to look at cleavages.

If you put them on display, its your look out.

Get yourself a polo neck.

GhostShip Fri 09-Nov-12 11:04:54

Oh give over. I'm a 36DD and wear low cut vest tops, men and women alike look! It's only like them looking at my face, if its there they're going to look. As long as they don't talk to my chest I'm not arsed.

whatsforyou Fri 09-Nov-12 11:07:25

If I was your co-worker I would have been 'gawping' too, I can't help staring at cleavage if on display and I may well have commented 'nice boobage' when you noticed grin
There is nothing sexual about it, I'm just noticing what's out there I also can't stop staring when I see bum cracks hanging out of trousers but wish I could
If you like wearing nice tops and underwear that show off your boobs then people will notice them. I am also a busty lady and know which tops boost them and which hide them, I dress appropriately for the situation as I know they will be noticed, just like if I wore red stilletos people would notice my feet.

Oh, and I think your reaction was fine, as was his!

squeakytoy Fri 09-Nov-12 11:08:30

"Come back to me when you've developed a heavenly fragrance or a single to match 'I need you'."

Now I know the OP is on a wind up grin

YerMaw1989 Fri 09-Nov-12 11:08:44

LOL at victim.

TulisaLover Fri 09-Nov-12 11:18:32

By the way fakebook, I've just been chatting to DP over facebook (it's not fake confused ) and he says 'A lot of the stuff that's reported on the news are false flag events designed to garner pyrrhic support from an apathetic and ignorant populous in order to justify further incursions into lands rich with mineral resources and black gold. This allows the debt ponzi to be continued'. Now, I have little idea what that means, but it sounds like he knows what he's talking about.

WorraLiberty Fri 09-Nov-12 11:20:53

Are you married to Jim Henson by any chance?

whatsforyou Fri 09-Nov-12 11:21:39

A lot of the stuff that's reported on the news are false flag events designed to garner pyrrhic support from an apathetic and ignorant populous in order to justify further incursions into lands rich with mineral resources and black gold. This allows the debt ponzi to be continued

No dear, he doesn't sound like he knows what he's talking about, he sounds like an arse.

TulisaLover Fri 09-Nov-12 11:21:52

He is not a muppet Worra - he knows what he's talking about and told me not to worry about it.

squeakytoy Fri 09-Nov-12 11:22:11

oh dear god.... grin

SunRaysthruClouds Fri 09-Nov-12 11:23:02

TulisaLover as a bloke I would just like to say how reasonable you are being, and how UR your colleague and everyone else is. If I was him I would have had my back turned, or possibly even better, gone into another room and phoned, lest my eyes be distracted downwards in such a scenario.

You could of course make an announcement before bending over to save red faces. Like 'eyes to the ceiling...now'.

WorraLiberty Fri 09-Nov-12 11:26:28

If you don't understand what he's saying, how can you possibly know he knows what he's talking about?

hopkinette Fri 09-Nov-12 11:26:31

Actually quite good - 6/10.

Fakebook Fri 09-Nov-12 11:30:20

I don't give a flying fuck what your dp "thinks".

WorraLiberty Fri 09-Nov-12 11:31:27

I'd like to know what this heavenly fragrance smells like

Does it smell like the Ghetto in Belsize Park?

SnowWide Fri 09-Nov-12 11:37:57

Debt ponzi? Pyrrhic? Does your DP really talk like that?? Wow!! Is he a professor of some sort? Or works for the Grauniad?

mycatlikestwiglets Fri 09-Nov-12 11:39:52

<marks place on thread>

Loving your work OP wink

Oh my good God. This is a wind-up, right?

I don't watch the news fakebook because it upsets me - half of it is propaganda for the 'credit card generation' according to my DP anyway. As far as I'm concerned, Tulisa is inspiring young people - it's a wonderful thing to criticise isn't it. Come back to me when you've developed a heavenly fragrance or a single to match 'I need you'.

He is not a muppet Worra - he knows what he's talking about and told me not to worry about it.

Yes, dear, don't worry your pretty little head. Listen to me and my mad conspiracy theories instead, and focus on Tulisa. Yes, the best thing a young woman could do is develop a heavenly fragrance. Never mind a cure for cancer, that's for Us Men to be thinking about.

EduCated Fri 09-Nov-12 11:43:05

Ahh, a good 'all news is propaganda for destroying the world' conspiracy. Not had one of them for a while.

Also, I got squirted with Tulisa's 'fragrance' by the fecking woman in Superdrug. Heavenly it is not.

LessMissAbs Fri 09-Nov-12 11:43:56

YANBU. Some women have small breasts, some have big breasts. Its a fact of life. Just as I don't go around with my eyes fixated on men's crotches, a man in the workplace shouldn't let himself be caught gawping down a woman's front. Its a basic workplace social skill. Its not a requirement for women to wear buttoned up to the chin crinoline vests to deter men, and some tops, while perfectly decent, from certain angles may show a little more - but only if someone is rude enough to look!

I am sure the OP had enough common sense not to go to work dressed as if for a nightclub.

I understood all of that except 'ponzi'. Wtf is a ponzi?

WorraLiberty Fri 09-Nov-12 11:44:33

Oh my good God. This is a wind-up, right?

Yes but it's quite a funny one grin

pinkyredrose Fri 09-Nov-12 11:44:49

"I have little idea what that means but it sounds like he knows what he's talking about" and "he knows what he's talking about and told me not to worry about it".

Sorry but grin.

Right I'm off to better myself by developing a heavenly fragrance.

squeakytoy Fri 09-Nov-12 11:45:30

"I am sure the OP had enough common sense not to go to work dressed as if for a nightclub"

After reading the rest of OPs posts, i doubt that very much... she is probably off getting her tulisa inspired tattoo by now.... grin

Sorry, but this is quite possibly the funniest thread in ages.

I think it's fair to say most people - male or female - will notice a pair of boobs if they are on display accidentally or otherwise. It's human nature. Yes, there is a line that can be crossed of ogling and that line may be different for different women.

I think there was a serious point at heart. But the stuff the OP has come out with since about Tulisa and her own DP had me spitting out my tea through laughing. Sad state of the world if she's regarded as a good role model. And do you REALLY think she helped develop that fragrance? Course she bloody didn't, some company just asked her to put her name on it (for a percentage of the profits) because they'll shift more bottles to the chavs.

No doubt OP thinks Katie Price writes her own books too.

WorraLiberty Fri 09-Nov-12 11:49:27

Some women have small breasts, some have big breasts. Its a fact of life.

Agreed

So what's the problem with looking at them?

By the way, the OP didn't say he was 'gawping'.

Fakebook Fri 09-Nov-12 11:50:00

I think OP was copying this look, the day her boobies were ogled.:

seksiiii

WorraLiberty Fri 09-Nov-12 11:54:01

Interesting dental floss there grin

<shameless place marking>

YerMaw1989 Fri 09-Nov-12 11:58:37

LMAO is your DP on any substances?

Fakebook Fri 09-Nov-12 11:59:48

Well you can't deny she's a good role model there I suppose. It's good she's promoting flossing. 1/5 people don't floss after brushing.

TulisaLover Fri 09-Nov-12 12:09:22

Sorry I was off having a chat with someone over coffee. Firstly @SunRaysthruClouds - you sound like the consumate gentleman - a rare commodity in the post Chris Brown forgiveness world. To those questioning the words of my DP - let me inform you that he was studying the PPE at Oxford university, but left after he worked out that 'the PPE is what's wrong with the country and it's perpetuating the faux keynesian philosophy'.

You couldn't make this up! Sheer genius!

Fakebook Fri 09-Nov-12 12:13:58

<clap clap clap>

Touché OP. Touché.

WorraLiberty Fri 09-Nov-12 12:14:11

PPE meaning Piss Poor Education?

WitchesTit Fri 09-Nov-12 12:24:23

You know, there are people who slow down when they see a car crash.

There are people who can't not look

same as when they see cleavage. It doesn't mean you have great tits.

Car crash tits

WitchesTit Fri 09-Nov-12 12:26:18

Is how it is termed, I believe.

Witch - brilliant analogy, car crash tits!! In your case, you only have one. Does that mean people stare more?

AgathaFusty Fri 09-Nov-12 12:27:49

As wind-up threads go, this one's not bad at all.

Maybe just laying it on a bit too thick now though?

TheShriekingHarpy Fri 09-Nov-12 12:36:38

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

pinkyredrose Fri 09-Nov-12 12:37:21

Come on OP, we want more of your pearls of wisdom.

Your level of enlightenment is absolutely astounding.

Roseformeplease Fri 09-Nov-12 12:40:26

The thread has made my day. "Studying the PPE" - surely that is just mispronounced and he is studying the peepee. (Yes, I know it is a real degree but it is not usually prefaced by "the). Also, if your husband talks total shite, and you don't recognise that, you should be questioning his ideas, not ours. He sounds like a patronising moron. And Tulisa ffs?

As for flashing your tits, if you go to work dressed in such a way that they can be seen, in whatever position you are in, then you must expect someone to have a look.

WitchesTit Fri 09-Nov-12 12:41:24

Voice - my face is so flipping gorgeous and what I say is so insightful and articulate, no one even glances at my tits sad

Roseformeplease Fri 09-Nov-12 12:41:29

Oh, and left University tends to mean "dropped out" and those who drop out always have an excuse - although his takes a very large biscuit.

KenLeeeeeee Fri 09-Nov-12 12:44:30

You know what is a really good word? Sesquipedalian . I love it.

AgathaFusty Fri 09-Nov-12 12:49:48

I wonder which regular under a name change this is?

corlan Fri 09-Nov-12 12:55:02

You couldn't make this up!

<ahem>

Witch - if you get a webcam, I will force myself to divert my gaze away from your flipping gorgeous face to glance at your cleavage. There are no females where I work and it's very dull for a bloke.

I'm currently wearing 'eau de baby sick' & it certainly stinks to high heaven, is that what OP meant? As for what her DP said, I didn't understand a word of it but can sleep soundly knowing he knows what he's talking about.

TulisaLover Fri 09-Nov-12 13:27:11

I've discussed peoples concerns with dp about his statements about the mainstream media. he says anyone who poo poo's him is very likely to be a bank of England shill wanting to disparage those who have woken up to the illusory nature of fiat currency.

Kaliani Fri 09-Nov-12 13:34:23

Well thats us told then!

Fiat currency? When did Italian motor cards become currency? I know things are a bit strapped in Italy but really...

I wonder if the real Tulisa knows where to use apostrophes? Important, in a role model, I think.... We should know these things.

Thank you so much, this has made my Friday!

Could your DP put that in English for us plebs to understand?

Daddelion Fri 09-Nov-12 13:41:02

'By the way fakebook, I've just been chatting to DP over facebook (it's not fake ) and he says 'A lot of the stuff that's reported on the news are false flag events designed to garner pyrrhic support from an apathetic and ignorant populous in order to justify further incursions into lands rich with mineral resources and black gold. This allows the debt ponzi to be continued'. Now, I have little idea what that means, but it sounds like he knows what he's talking about.'

If you don't know what he means, but he sounds like he knows what he's talking about, never go and buy a car on your own.

Fakebook Fri 09-Nov-12 13:41:52

OP, we know you are being mendaciloquent, albeit, covertly. Your arcipluvian description of your "dp's" views make me cachinnate.

In regards to your booby problem, I can only think that you must be so eumorphous

Fakebook Fri 09-Nov-12 13:43:14

... That you must be one of the most exoptable woman in the team which is why you were ogled.

TulisaLover Fri 09-Nov-12 13:49:02

I've asked him for a dumbed down version - he's actually part of the campaign for plain english so he was happy to help.

Ponzi - an investment scam where early participants returns come purely from money invested by new participants in the scheme. He says the UK housing market and the state pension are excellent examples of this.

Fiat Currency - a currency backed by government backed that will usually end up not being fulfilled to creditors as they thought as the seductive nature of paying back debts by printing more takes hold. He says any money not backed by gold isn't real.

YellowTulips Fri 09-Nov-12 13:50:29

gets cup of brew and waits to see how this thread develops grin

Corrrrrr, TITS <leers at everyone on thread>

CarolynKnappShappey Fri 09-Nov-12 13:59:12

If it is a regular having a lark then I salute her research "fiat money" in particular is a classic financial conspiracy buzzphrase - put it into Google with a few of the other gems from "DH" and you'll be up to your neck in Icke-ite Iizard-spotters.

<waits for next instalment>
We need a popcorn icon surely?

I don't really get how we went from cleavage to ponzi's in a relatively short space of time confused

TulisaLover Fri 09-Nov-12 14:00:17

Carolyn - if I am interpreting DP's words correctly you have outed yourself as a Bank of England shill!

pinkyredrose Fri 09-Nov-12 14:00:38

This thread has made my fucking day!

I've been reading 'fiat money' as 'flat money'...now the Italian motor car comment makes a bit more sense blush

pinkyredrose Fri 09-Nov-12 14:06:06

Hey TulisaLover would you like to tell us what a Bank of England shill is?

Quick ask your partner, he'll know!

YellowTulips Fri 09-Nov-12 14:07:07

Can you DP share his wisdom on the proposition that given no ecomomy uses the Gold Standard should we all be buying Fiat 500's to hedge against the faux keynesian philosophy being perpetuated by Bank of Englad shil's....

I'm really worried about this and in the market for a new car.

YellowTulips Fri 09-Nov-12 14:12:50

Any advice on which model to go for would also be appreciated - was thinking of the "Twin Air" and your other half clearly has a full understanding of gas management.

It would be such relief to get some expert male advice on this troubling subject so I can stop worrying my pretty little head about it.

TulisaLover Fri 09-Nov-12 14:14:18

DP : A shill is basically someone who pretends to be independent when offering an opinion, when they are actually working towards a hidden agenda for someone else.

TulisaLover Fri 09-Nov-12 14:16:12

He says the ideal fiat to go for is a 1995 Panda. Frugal and fulfils the bangernomics philosophy he rigorously adheres to.

Cozy9 Fri 09-Nov-12 14:19:37

What does any of this have to do with tits?

TulisaLover Fri 09-Nov-12 14:25:55

Wow - My colleague just came into apologise for yesterday... he says he was ashamed of his behaviour. I've told him that in future he should simply turn around and speak to ne with his back. turned if I'm leaning over. he's happy to do so, so we've come to an amicable agreement on a going forward basis.

YellowTulips Fri 09-Nov-12 14:26:19

Thank you

I shall start my searh on AutoTrader forthwith. Any advice on colour? I am concerned that red might infer associations with keynesian, when I generally subcribe to supply side economics as advocated by monetarist policy with a dash of libertarian ideology.

Its all so confusing....whats a girl to do?

Cynner Fri 09-Nov-12 14:29:05

He trotted into your office and said sorry for checking out your rack?

TulisaLover Fri 09-Nov-12 14:29:40

Navy blue is always a winner tulips IMHO - classic, demure and no negative connotations. don't need dp for that.

Fakebook Fri 09-Nov-12 14:30:23

Well isn't that a lovely turn of events. hmm.

TulisaLover Fri 09-Nov-12 14:30:26

Dp says hayek would approve too.

Cynner Fri 09-Nov-12 14:32:32

I could only hope to be a speck on the wall for those future meetings..

TulisaLover Fri 09-Nov-12 14:34:49

Hmmm.... I am tempted to go in braless on Monday and call him into the office to test his resolve.....

DinosaursOnASpaceship Fri 09-Nov-12 14:38:44

I was going to post a sensible answer along the lines of it being normal to look to some degree (I know I can't help it at times if there are boobs on display - a woman down the road always has hers visa me and I am embarrassingly aware that whenever I speak to her it's a concious effort to talk to her face not her chest) but ogling and letching is totally different and not acceptable.

But then I read the last few pages of the thread and got totally lost. I don't understand the long words and can make no sense of the conversation.

I've always wondered if faux keynesian relates to Milton Keynes. I mean, they have those faux cows in the fields made of concrete, don't they?

TulisaLover Fri 09-Nov-12 14:44:44

The cows are supposedly allegorical sculptures symbolising the elites ability to milk the lumpenproletariat dry of their will to live according to dp.

Come on Tulisalover...who are you really? A joke's a joke & all that but I'm lost nowconfused

SnowWide Fri 09-Nov-12 14:58:44

Is Milton Keynes a brother of John Maynard Keynes? Always wondered that....a celebrity sibling AND a dull town named after you.... Talk about a double whammy!!

TheShriekingHarpy Fri 09-Nov-12 15:00:47

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LimburgseVlaai Fri 09-Nov-12 15:04:37

he's actually part of the campaign for plain english so he was happy to help.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

BTW Tulisa's husband: if you want to be a pompous arse, at least learn to spell 'populace' correctly.

TulisaLover Fri 09-Nov-12 15:05:53

Milton keynes was supposedly named after a nearby village which was originally called Middleton, but has had its name altered many times throughout the centuries. The fact that its name now is a combo of two famous economists (Milton Friedman and JM Keynes) is further proof of how far back the plans of the New world order actually go according to dp. its like they are orchestrating all this in plain sight!

TulisaLover Fri 09-Nov-12 15:08:26

limburges, according to dp your name sounds rather borghese-esque, so not sure whether or not you're another shill. Either way, dp is obsessed with late eighties bullfrog computer games, hence he's got populous on the brain.

SnowWide Fri 09-Nov-12 15:17:22

Oooooooh!! I am amazed.

<prostrates before Tulisa and her "DP"> (Is DP's last name Wiki, by any chance?)

People, what are you doing mucking about on other threads? Come back here, we are being given an edukashun!

Cynner Fri 09-Nov-12 15:21:12

I attempted to draw my dh into a rousing economic discussion...unfortunately, he wanted to discuss booooooobies..

MatureUniStudent Fri 09-Nov-12 15:43:14

Thank you TulisaLover - thank you. I have spent the last two hours trying to find anything to distract me from continuing my essay about amorophus concepts of liability in Nisi Prius and proximity negating possible ramifications - and you have done it. So intrigued am I by your DP's theories, your breasts and our shared adoration of Tulisa (47 and I have all NDubz CD's and, oh yes, here you will need to stay your beating heart in your heaving breast - the Official NDubz 2010 Album) that I have totally forgotten the overwhelming call of my essay and it's looming deadline. Thank you once again. You is well reemz.

"I've told him that in future he should simply turn around and speak to ne with his back. turned if I'm leaning over."

You dirty pervert, you blatantly just used this as an excuse to check out his arse wink

samandi Fri 09-Nov-12 18:12:37

He was probably thinking a low cut shirt was rather inappropriate for a professional environment.

TulisaLover Fri 09-Nov-12 18:45:11

Sorry I was out watching the new Marion Cortillard vehicle - absolutely marvellous. No I will not be checking out his bottom. Bums aint my thing.

Maybe in the interests of fairness you should also turn your back on him during conversations? That way neither of you could accidentally look at any part of the others anatomy? Or insist on blindfolds? Maybe only converse via telephone? Or through a door?

TulisaLover Fri 09-Nov-12 19:16:59

That would hardly work Murder when I have very important sorting to be done. plus I would be facing a wall, which is hardly becoming of someone of my seniority.

Hilarious! grin

ImperialBlether Fri 09-Nov-12 19:36:17

What are you on, OP? And what the FUCK is your husband on?

ZillionChocolate Fri 09-Nov-12 19:47:27

From bangers to bangernomics in 6 pages. Only on mumsnet.

pinkyredrose Fri 09-Nov-12 20:07:50

Well done TulisaLover u had us all going!

MamaMary Sat 10-Nov-12 13:36:26

Love the bit about plain English campaign grin

EduCated Sat 10-Nov-12 13:57:14

YY, Mama, love the attention to detail grin

Tweasels Sat 10-Nov-12 14:04:17

I love this thread. I'm ashamed I haven't found it sooner.

Sallyingforth Sat 10-Nov-12 17:50:16

TulisaLover
Do you know what goes into developing a fragrance? It's not exactly something that a celebimbo can drop into when she has a spare afternoon - even such a magnificent role model as your heroine.

What usually happens with sponsorship deals is that someone sells their name in exchange for a fixed sum and/or a share of the profits from selling the product.

Still I don't suppose that will stop you from queuing up to buy when she has developed a shampoo or developed a handbag. Get real!

TulisaLover Sat 10-Nov-12 17:56:45

That is simply not true Sallying in this case. For those that don't know, Tulisa showed an incredible aptitude to organic chemistry at school, frequently combining cyclo-hexane with benzoids and producing some of the most devilishly delicious fragrances ever to waft within a classroom. When she was approached to produce a perfume, it was a chance for her to flex her fearsome knowledge of ethyls. The results - mind blowing and it's a fragrance that has delighted everyone in my workplace.

She did the entire thing pro-bono too as a gift to the world.

Tweasels Sat 10-Nov-12 18:03:40

I luffs you Tulisalover. That makes me a Tulisaloverlover.

wildfig Sat 10-Nov-12 18:15:04

Sorry, OP, this is very off-topic and a bit nosy, but how did you and your DP meet? For some reason, I'm getting a strong mental image of Fifty Shades of Grey meets Secretary.

Sallyingforth Sat 10-Nov-12 18:16:21

Gosh TulisaLover

With a talent like that I'm disappointed she hasn't got a Nobel prize yet smile

Perhaps she should sort out the Israel-Palestine problem when she has a spare minute. And why did she let that hurricane hit New York when she only had to lift her little finger?

Sallyingforth Sat 10-Nov-12 18:19:11

PS. My DP would like to know why your breasts were so attractive to the guy in your office. Any chance of uploading a picture for him?

TulisaLover Sat 10-Nov-12 18:30:49

Wildfig - kind of a funny story....we actually met at the local bowling alley. DP was continuously foot-faulting in the adjacent lane, which was absolutely doing my head in. I marched up to him and said "Can you not just once do it properly?'

'My dear, frankly I don't give a damn.' was his response. I had to have him right there.

He took me out to the Frankie and Benny's of the time, and we bonded over a mutual love of onion rings. The kissing was grotesquely smelly, but deeply passionate. It's a tale for the ages.

The Israel-Palestine problem is easy. Everyone in both regions is given $250k relocation expenses, printed out of thin air via Bernanke's special money machine, and is given special dispensation to go to whatever country in the world they wish to live - no visa issues, full naturalised status.

Thus no-one lives permanently in that region - except for a select few agnostic/aethists who run a theme park there where anyone can come for two weeks at a time. Win-win.

No pics of breasts. I only do bottomless.

freetoanyhome Sat 10-Nov-12 18:37:30

grin

BewitchedBotheredandBewildered Sat 10-Nov-12 19:17:04

Are you a fire-breathing product of a beehive with a sting in your tail?

grin

tinkertitonk Sun 11-Nov-12 00:13:14

Tulisalover, I swallowed it all.

Well done. Hats off to a brilliant wind-up.

YouBloodyWolf Sun 11-Nov-12 05:27:40

Wind-up aside, I've found this thread fascinating and revealing illuminating.

In my hand-wringing Ben Eltonish way I've always thought that cleavage blimping was a seedy, aberrant act that marked me out as a sex-pest. I'm very fond of boobies but always feel guilty when I check out a partly-exposed pair, and blush and fluster if I'm caught doing so. But now I learn that most women aren't actually bothered as long as it's not done blatantly, and that sometimes it's sort of welcome? Have I got that right?

I am not a pervert.

Cortana Sun 11-Nov-12 09:31:17

For me as long as you're just having a look, not touching or expecting anything more than a cheeky look it's all good YouBloodyWolf. Slightly more subtle but if you watch closely a lot of women will be checking out arses, forearms and occasionally "the bulge" if my peers are anything to go by. Nothing wrong with appreciating the human form.

Tulisa, would it have been ok if he was selling you discounted meat at the Waitrose counter?

TulisaLover Sun 11-Nov-12 10:24:04

Well... if I'm getting a highly discounted lamb neck fillet, I'll accept slightly more than a furtive glance, but would draw the line at an ogle. Chuck in some chorizo chipolatas though and all bets are off.

A wonderful read for a Sunday morning, before I start work,it's a pity Rhubarb did not come on, & post her amazing funny posts.
I would have had a look at the flesh on show too.wink

YouBloodyWolf Sun 11-Nov-12 10:42:04

Cortana - I notice ladies checking out arses etc, always kinda thought norks were different. The tortured thought processes of a child of the eighties...

TulisaLover Mon 12-Nov-12 23:02:39

Bump due to the wonderfully middle class nature of this thread.

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