to want a bun fight?

(123 Posts)
MardyBra Sat 06-Oct-12 09:48:07

It's Saturday morning and the rest of the family are out and about. So I logged onto MN to get some bunfight entertainment, and you're all being nice. So where are the vipers this morning?

MrsRajeshKoothrappali Sat 06-Oct-12 09:49:12

<Throws a bun.>


MardyBra Sat 06-Oct-12 09:50:33

<eats bun>

ledkr Sat 06-Oct-12 09:51:53

Fuck off with your buns < lobs a dripper>

tangerinefeathers Sat 06-Oct-12 09:51:58

I'll have ya!

TeeBee Sat 06-Oct-12 09:52:39

We've eaten them all.

MardyBra Sat 06-Oct-12 09:52:54

I'm looking for a 300+ post AIBU, with opposing factions, name calling and deletions. Not a solitary lob of a bun. [ wink]

ledkr Sat 06-Oct-12 09:54:03

I'm off to spend my benefits on a goat and big tv whilst parking in a p and c space and have a piss in a disabled toilet

Disabled parking spaces should be sold to the highest bidder and old people should be banned from shopping whilst I am.

And discuss.

Slugslasher Sat 06-Oct-12 09:56:27

Sorry, I'm fairly new here, what is this 'goat' of which you refer?

Slugslasher Sat 06-Oct-12 09:57:49

.....and shouldn't you all be polishing the silver..?

VintageAxeWeldingPboredWarrior Sat 06-Oct-12 09:58:23

What the fucks your problem with buns huh.

<harbours fleeing buns>

<gets fat eating buns>

<fucks orf>

Tweasels Sat 06-Oct-12 10:00:17

Ah, here we go again. Another cliquey/quichey thread where people do <<stuff inside these brackety thingies>>

<<sits tight and waits to be bullied>>

InvisibleHotPinkWeasel Sat 06-Oct-12 10:00:34

Abortion thread in politics is starting to kick off nicely sad

puds11 Sat 06-Oct-12 10:01:19

How about we discuss how bad it is to formula feed your baby?

<pats large stack of buns>

tweasels things are only quichey if you don't join in ;P

catgirl1976 Sat 06-Oct-12 10:02:23

I FF my baby and put him a day orphanage. And his middle name is Boris.

<lob buns this way>

TheGOLDCunnyFunt Sat 06-Oct-12 10:02:33

Fuck off Tweasels wink

<throws bums>

MardyBra Sat 06-Oct-12 10:02:43

Oh that sounds a bit serious weasel. I'd settle for a good Mil thread. Or an Op who won't accept she is Bu supersoaker-style.

< refuses to type stylee>

TheGOLDCunnyFunt Sat 06-Oct-12 10:03:07

Bums? Eww. buns!!!

I formula feed my goat and I'm proud of it.

<strokes 52" tv>

MardyBra Sat 06-Oct-12 10:04:42

slug I think the goat is an Oxfam gift of a goat to a developing country. A disputed gift choice.

HecateHarshPants Sat 06-Oct-12 10:05:04

WHAT are your children doing while you are on here trying to get a cheap thrill by starting a fight? They are quite clearly neglected/malnourished/going to join a gang. You are a woman and your role is to provide a stimulating environment for your children. You should be baking cakes right now. And making your husband a cup of tea. He's had a hard week and deserves your attention and devotion.

And your hair looks crap today.

there you go. That ought to do it.

Tweasels Sat 06-Oct-12 10:05:59

I don't want no bums thrown at me. What if you haven't wiped properly?

catgirl1976 Sat 06-Oct-12 10:06:39

Oooh oh...I shave my fanjo, work ft and I don't know why I even bothered to have a baby (it was the cute outfits obvs)

MardyBra Sat 06-Oct-12 10:06:41

Tweasels. This could be a mardy quiche to counteract the emerging Larpers and Pos no I'm not bitter for not making THE list

MardyBra Sat 06-Oct-12 10:07:17

I agree with Hecate.

Slugslasher Sat 06-Oct-12 10:07:55

Ooooooooh! The WI love those!

BigBroomstickBIWI Sat 06-Oct-12 10:09:24

Shall I put a call out on Facebook and Twitter to get all the Regulars to do a pile on? wink

ShirleyRots Sat 06-Oct-12 10:12:56

FFS. Haven't you got anything better to do?

I feel sorry for your children. And your husband as well. And the house you live in. And if you have pets I feel sorry for them and all.

ledkr Sat 06-Oct-12 10:12:59

I am still bf my goat and he is older than me. And what? Come and have a go if you think you are hard enough cunty bollocks

Tweasels Sat 06-Oct-12 10:13:13

Mardy quiche, made with goats cheese.

On the subject of Oxfam goats. If someone sends a goat to Africa rather than buying you the usual Boots No 7 gift set. Retaliate by sending them a their house.

lovebunny Sat 06-Oct-12 10:15:49

goats are cute.
don't you people have any... trifle...

ledkr Sat 06-Oct-12 10:16:00

I am having a two week holiday to "Disney land Florida,in America" and I live in a council house Bring it on

ShirleyRots Sat 06-Oct-12 10:17:03

Oh ledkr - have you been before? IT IS AMAZINGLY AMAZING AND BRILLIANT. envy

MardyBra Sat 06-Oct-12 10:19:47

Yeah fine, all you GANG talk amongst yourselves using your secret codes and SIGNALS.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!MAKES ME SICK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

How d'you like them apples?

ledkr Sat 06-Oct-12 10:20:43

Ent really Shirley but have before yes ace can't afford it these days not enough tax credits grin

ShirleyRots Sat 06-Oct-12 10:22:18

Oh those bastards not giving you enough tax credits to go on holiday. Do you smoke? <puffs on £92 worth of WTC - just to fuck people off>

ledkr Sat 06-Oct-12 10:25:03

I don't smoke no shirl but I forgot that last night whilst out and smoked about 400 have a sore throat now

SoleSource Sat 06-Oct-12 10:26:06

Oh fuck off and take your anger out on people in reality, you weak weasel.

redwhiteandblueeyedsusan Sat 06-Oct-12 10:26:29

ah tweasels...
<thinks> hmm bullying you say?

how about...

"go boil your head and fuck off to the far side of fuck..."

is that good enough for you huh? <snigger>

usualsuspect3 Sat 06-Oct-12 10:32:07

You should be doing your housework and cooking your hubbys dinner from scratch, not posting on the internet.

I hope my taxpayers money isn't funding your internet!!!!!!! angry

MardyBra Sat 06-Oct-12 10:33:37

The problem is, I can't be arsed to respond to the provocations. I just want MN to have a bunfight to entertain me.

Tiredmumno1 Sat 06-Oct-12 10:35:17

Would you lot please shut the fuck up, I have a headache!

Thank you

<throws trifle at mardy>

usualsuspect3 Sat 06-Oct-12 10:35:35

I'm going out now, the bunfights usually kick off when I'm out and are all deleted when I get back.

With only threads about threads alluding to them left.

SoleSource Sat 06-Oct-12 10:40:17

Throws cake tin at Tired's head grin

<hides behind Usual>

Tiredmumno1 Sat 06-Oct-12 10:41:57

<gets out flame throwers>

And for your info sole, usual will be on my side.

<pokes tongue out>


MardyBra Sat 06-Oct-12 10:42:36
SoleSource Sat 06-Oct-12 10:43:25

Bests up usual,> now fecking what?

MardyBra Sat 06-Oct-12 10:44:20

Ran = mean

Tiredmumno1 Sat 06-Oct-12 10:45:12

Not sure sole? I am too busy laughing my head off at bests up gringrin

SoleSource Sat 06-Oct-12 10:46:40

spose best get showered and dwessed

See yow laters x

Proudnscary Sat 06-Oct-12 10:47:09


My MIL's a BITCH because she cleans my house and buys the dc's unsolicited presents...who does she think she is?? Meddling old bag!!!

And..and...I'm going to send my dc to private schools because the state system is shite and full of peasants!!!!!!!!!!

<throws 86 buns with dynamite filling and detonates them>

Tiredmumno1 Sat 06-Oct-12 10:48:16

Make sure you dodge the flame throwers on the way out sole wink

Have a lovely morning smile

Aethelfleda Sat 06-Oct-12 10:49:47

Can I post to avoid tidying the house for yet another viewing??

<loads up the trebuchet with a giant, formula-fed, tatooed bun>

<crank, crank, crank....>

BoffinMum Sat 06-Oct-12 10:51:54

I think politicians who agree with the 12 or even the 20 week abortion thing ought to be forced to adopt a couple of children with life threatening multiple complex disabilities each. And assessed by OFSTED annually to see how well they are doing.

If that doesn't start a MN bunfight I don't know what will.

<Hoists bosom>

MardyBra Sat 06-Oct-12 11:00:10

YANBU boffin

MardyBra Sat 06-Oct-12 11:00:34

<off to stir things up on Baby Names>

VintageAxeWeldingPboredWarrior Sat 06-Oct-12 11:00:44

<<<<<comes back for trifle, quiche and apples>>>>>

you are all wankstains on the butt of humanity

Tweasels Sat 06-Oct-12 11:08:57

Wankstain (snigger)

Slugslasher Sat 06-Oct-12 11:11:35

I do think the 50% tax rate for high earners is too much though!

I would have been here earlier but I was parked in the maccy d's disabled space with my twins who are wearing matching dresses btw. One is a boy but I like them to look the same and pink on boys is ok!

I was letting my older dc eat his nuggets whilst I breastfed one twin and bottlefed the other. The goat will get the leftovers!

We were just on our way to shop for our 3rd holiday.

<lobs kiplings trifle bakewaell>

VintageAxeWeldingPboredWarrior Sat 06-Oct-12 11:25:48

Foine, winkstans then, ffs

<<<<tosses porridge>>>>

FrustratedSycamorePants Sat 06-Oct-12 11:45:18

<lobs sticky buns>

Leave the bastard.

<legs it>

MardyBra Sat 06-Oct-12 11:50:40

Ah. I've just found the meat-eating Dh thread. That should keep me busy rubbernecking for a while.

MardyBra Sat 06-Oct-12 11:52:34

Or I could start a "who's your fav MNer" thread.

SoleSource Sat 06-Oct-12 11:55:16

Oh you are all a load of ole trollops on this thread.

<very smug middle clarrs gavel>

Please don't gift me a goat as I already have lots.

Can you send me some money instead so I can go on holiday.

Thanking you kindly.

VintageAxeWeldingPboredWarrior Sat 06-Oct-12 12:06:32

Vintage is my most favourities mner eva.

<<<eats clarrs>>>

<<lets goat eat Mardys jumper>>

>gives 2p to hiloday fund<

redwhiteandblueeyedsusan Sat 06-Oct-12 12:09:22

you bastard aethel... just snorted coffee.


The taxpayers money is funding my entire lifestyle.

Just out of the hairdresser, fag in hand, bought everyone pre-made sandwiches for lunch.

Suck it up you cliquey cunts.

MaryZed Sat 06-Oct-12 12:12:51

I see you are all buying into the Mumsnet Orchestrated Culture of Bullying hmm

You should be ashamed of yourselves.

FrustratedSycamorePants Sat 06-Oct-12 12:12:53

<lobs goat at tess>

<catches goat>

<spins around like wonder woman>

<lobs it back>

<peers at 2p in holiday jar>

Come on! We can do better than that. I am entitled to a holiday.

Narked Sat 06-Oct-12 12:19:34

<Flings M&S Spice, Iced Buns>

<Flings self after them to retrieve them>

I am utterly offended by everything on this thread. You are all bullies and you have made me cry!!

FrustratedSycamorePants Sat 06-Oct-12 12:30:10

<goat smashes into head as ninja reflexes fail>

<<flings goat poo instead>>

<<<ducks to avoid narked>>>

FrustratedSycamorePants Sat 06-Oct-12 12:31:28

<lobs a teacher and some pampas grass> grin

Fakebook Sat 06-Oct-12 12:34:55

I think all women should breastfeed. Women who formula feed are selfish horrible women with no shame. Why doesn't anyone tell them BREAST IS BEST. BREAST IS BEST.

mrsminerva Sat 06-Oct-12 12:38:12

You are all being really passive aggressive, I hate you all, have a biscuit instead of buns and goats.

SomeTosser Sat 06-Oct-12 12:47:47

<strokes goat collection>
All of youse who don't buy goats with your benefits are fuckin lezzers.
Yer. Lezzers.
Lezzers who kill babies and smoke craven A and think that Eric is hotter than Alcide.

<chucks chelsea buns indiscriminately>

VintageAxeWeldingPboredWarrior Sat 06-Oct-12 12:56:09

<<<eats babees>>>

>takes 2p back<

Call that intetled, sheeeesh

<<pats direct cow>>

MaryZed Sat 06-Oct-12 12:56:11

And why has no-one mentioned the bullying of the poor goat?

FunnysInLaJardin Sat 06-Oct-12 12:58:15

we are not allowed to be nasty now. We have to say 'you sound like an arse and here's a compelling argument why' And TBH that is soooo much less fun than saying you are a twat that no one is bothering so it seems

VintageAxeWeldingPboredWarrior Sat 06-Oct-12 13:01:27

You are a twat Fanny

<waits to see if universe is realonged>

FunnysInLaJardin Sat 06-Oct-12 13:05:35

my name is Funnys, if you don't mind, and I'm reporting yo ass for that PA


I have more bedrooms than I need, will I be moving? Will I fuck.

<gathers in more taxpayer dosh, spends it in Boden on stuff I don't need>

The goat had it comin' MaryZed

It was giving me evils.

<reports everyone including the goat>

SomeTosser Sat 06-Oct-12 13:36:04

<loads goats into a deHavilland, goatbombs Devon>

Report THAT, TessCowDirect!

VintageAxeWeldingPboredWarrior Sat 06-Oct-12 13:45:30

<<brings in the heavilly artillered cows>>

>loads cow pats<

>>sets target on on twat winkstans<<

Is that DA enough for ya


IvanaHumpalot Sat 06-Oct-12 13:52:04

No buns here - just some naice pastries. Tea anyone?

Mmmmm, carbs......

Stop goading me Ivana , you know I'm on a diet.


VintageAxeWeldingPboredWarrior Sat 06-Oct-12 13:59:52

Oooooo tea

<unloads weapons of poo destruction>



<<parks goat in C+P parking space, swishes immaculate hair and puts Grand Theft Auto on for DCs>>

You A All BU. And bullies. And wrong!

And doesn't anyone think of the children??

<<throws Pombears>>

LetsFaceTheMusicAndDance Sat 06-Oct-12 14:09:52

Oh FFS what's the matter with you? hmm

You just could of started one..... (like that! smile)

It was very quiet on MN last night though.

No laundering kittens or fanjo boils or anything fun.

(That ought do do it wink)

Youv al splet evryfing rong nd yer grammmer s shirt!

MaryZed Sat 06-Oct-12 14:17:55


I'm waiting for a good opportunity to use it (and expect to be summarily told off).

You can't be told off for using it, Justine enshrined it into MN law.

MaryZed Sat 06-Oct-12 14:22:22

Yes, but if you look at her later post carefully, she is backtracking and saying we can only use it on benefit type threads.

So I expect it may not, sadly, be around for long.

I don't actually think Justine herself has any idea how strict the deletion policy is these days. 'cos when she was in charge it was much more fun.


MardyBra Sat 06-Oct-12 14:26:33

What's Ypmyallslaa?

(missed the webchat)

Well that's just rude! I suggest we leave a flaming bag of dog poo outside of MN towers.

Your post makes you sound like an arse.

MardyBra Sat 06-Oct-12 14:28:39


MaryZed Sat 06-Oct-12 14:29:40

Your post makes you sound like an arse (to be followed by "and here is the reason why").

Justine said it was ok to use, wasn't a personal attack and that some people were arses. Apparently saying "your post makes you sound like" is'nt the same as "you sound like an arse" or "you are an arse".

Unfortunately, I suspect she might have got carried away and now wishes she hadn't posted.

MaryZed Sat 06-Oct-12 14:30:24

and that apostrophe in isn't is a typo, btw.

Frontpaw Sat 06-Oct-12 14:40:41

I don't like buns.
I like donuts.

MardyBra Sat 06-Oct-12 15:00:52

Good point front. I'm not that partial to buns myself. Can we lob carrot cake?

SomewhereInCanada Sat 06-Oct-12 15:09:45

< sticks head above parapet >

< loads maple syrup covered moose into long range cannon >

Is this a private party or can anyone join in?

Tiredmumno1 Sat 06-Oct-12 15:11:31

<opens mouth, awaits carrot cake>

And some bread pudding if you have any wink

Would anybody mind throwing a vanilla slice this way?

MardyBra Sat 06-Oct-12 15:16:18

Love your user name btw Tess.


Thanks Mardy.

<< sprinkles glitter, fairy dust and happiness over the whole thread >>

Two minutes and thirty-three seconds until I end you all some more vibes of lurrrve and forgiveness

<< runs>>

MaryZed Sat 06-Oct-12 16:41:57

Feck off SDTG

<sweeps up glitter> <finds more glitter> <loses temper>

Frontpaw Sat 06-Oct-12 16:49:02

You'll never get rid of that effing glitter. It gets everywhere. Thanks. Thanks a lot.

VintageAxeWeldingPboredWarrior Sat 06-Oct-12 17:00:38

judgemintal clunty barstards the lot of yea.

<<<adds sparkly stars to the glitter>>

>>puts 2p back in the hiloday pot<<

<takes out Tess's spliff>

Yay! 2p back in the holiday pot.

<flicks through brochures>

You're all lovely really.

Hang on a minute..........where the bloody hell's my spliff gone??

<< hides glitter everywhere >>

catgirl1976 Sat 06-Oct-12 19:26:55

I'm in one

Play fighting thread has a crowd around it shouting "fight, fight, fight"

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